AbuAeesha:
haven't heard men with more than one legal wife come up with such complain.
most domestic violence committed is usually between a man and single wife.
the earlier you all accept that polygamy is a solution to some marital problem,the better.
but when done the right way.
say no to ADULTERY AND FORNICATION!!

MARRY THEM LEGALLY!!

women like competition - once they conclude that you got no game, then you are boring ... then they leave u for someone who makes them believe they have other women desiring him.. don't be boring - NEVER LOOK HELPLESS BEFORE ANY WOMAN - even your mother (as a grown man) - women are emotional creatures, and they do not need an emotional you - sometimes leave her guessing - even if she ask u whats on your mind? tell her, i will take care of it, never mind - and stick to that, dont ever let her feel like she can predict you- surprise her with gifts if u can afford it and sometimes let the hammer of your wrath fall in her presence if she crosses the line and never let her tears after every disagreement make you apologize...the dumbest of women can manipulate the smartest of men with tears, dont fall for that crap! AS LONG AS U DO NOT LAY YOUR HANDS ON A WOMAN - (which i wont ever advise any man to do) NEVER EVER APOLOGIZE TO HER for any misunderstanding u guys have. Women are very manipulative and they can make weak men cede their powers to them so easily - let her chase you and u can do so by being spontaneously unavailable - guy form activity if u gat no game in the actual sense - travel for the weekend - and never give her details of where you are going, if she ask you where u are going, tell her you need some quiet to think and meditate / fast and pray for divine revelations and you need to be alone - make her jealous- when u return, look happy and satisfied with your life and ignore her without being nasty - do that and come tell me the result ----- guy many things dey, dont get angry, get even ---- life is a game, always play to win - DONT YOU EVER FORGET THAT!!!!!

�

No go die for road because of one ußeless woman ooooo...





No go any meeting again. If they can't call their daughter to order without ur presence make Dem go die

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post=112382333:

No be small matter o

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Mr righteousness welcome back, how is thy miracle baby doing. Don't forget to invite me to the child dedication service.

Righteousness2:
From your epistle, no one said you are wrong.
As for the meeting, make yourself available for it , if you can.
Explore every avenue to bring peace.
Most Important, commit your Family to GOD ALMIGHTY in Prayers. Conciously bring GOD into your Home.

I Pray for you that My Precious DADDY Heals your Home and restore the Love , Joy , Peace and togetherness that brought you two together , in JESUS Name

I'll suggest you resolve the issue with your wife and not involve third party (family). You married her and you should know how to appeal to your wife( man must get the code of him wife) if it's for you to beg her, please swallow your pride and do so, it's obvious you must have hurt her badly and that's the reason she's behaving that way. Try to look for how to get into her heart, am sure she'll definitely tell you everything..She might not want to expose your mistake to her family..so do the needful, pet her , show her love, take her on vacation and make another baby

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

It's time to move on, Mr man. Divorce her. She already cheating on you.

Cutehector:
Still go for the meeting

Still go to the meeting the devil is trying to use her to destabilise the family and bring her down to Notting.

@ poster, I suggest you honor the meeting. So far the parents have shown you love, they didn't side their own. For their sake and for the love you have for her do it. After the meeting if she refused to change . Try and unsettle her mind by arranging with a lady that can act as your girl friend. Invite her to the house, make her sleep in the visitor's room and you sleep in the room with her I didn't say be intimate ooo let her have something to worry about. She will have no choice but to arrange herself all by herself Matthew.

Apply "Yul's Formula"

Pray with her every morning as you wake up and before sleeping at night. Mention those specific things that is troubling you both in your prayers. Use the Bible teach her, Invite God to intervene. Some women has certain indecent attitude they brought from their families which they feel is normal. Something as simple as not dressing bed, feeling Sand on bed and on the floor can irritates me. And if a woman don't care it can piss me off easily. Some women don't like bathing in the evening before going to bed. And if you insist she bathe, she will ask if she is smelling. Some will not clean the house for days. And many more are turn offs for men.

elonmuskbaby:
lmaooo man wey don get migraine,you wan add diabetes to solve migraine?

That’s his best bet. When a woman starts behaving that way and you know deep down you did nothing, he should let her go. Them nor dey force person stay for marriage.
If he did something, she would have said it when a meeting was called. It goes to tell you she is not interested in that man anymore.

Well you can fight for custody in court

Sominablack:
Thanks all for the advice, I appreciate. But as it is now, am no longer interested in the relationship any longer, how can I do with my daughter of 7years that's the only issue bothering me now, cos I dont want her to influence her negatively.

I think you should be observing her.. I mean the kind of friends she keeps maybe lately.. And you watch her communication on phone.. Because if a woman starts behaving like this there is something to it.. Because I don't see a reason when someone would try to make peace and the other party is saying nothing that @ times you wake her up in the middle of night still yet nothing. I think she is trying to frustrates and manipulate you

What more do you want?
She said she has lost the love she has for you and doesn't want to be a wife anymore... These things happen. People fall out of love. Please give her a break, so she doesn't do something you both will regret.

Sominablack:
Thanks all for the advice, I appreciate. But as it is now, am no longer interested in the relationship any longer, how can I do with my daughter of 7years that's the only issue bothering me now, cos I dont want her to influence her negatively.

Am African proverb says that when you see a little bird dancing on a bush path, the player of the music is close by.

Your wife has probably lost love for you and that marriage because of bad advises from bad friends or a new love interest she is willing to explore. At this juncture there is little you can do because you can take a horse to the steam but can't force it to drink.

She is hoping for a separation so she can go and look how green the other side is. Divorce or not, It is up to you but whatever you do be successful, move on and be a better you.

Since she wants out take custody of the child if you can so she doesn't poison her mind towards you & still use her as leverage to fleece you.

Na everything una dey bring com nairaland?..struggling to understand the diction.

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

You don't want to honour your father in-laws scheduled meeting but you want your wife to respect you.

Go for the meeting. Don't disrespect your father in law. That will not be good enough.

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

Come, why don't you guys know how to handle these situations? If she decides to avoid intimacy, can't you have it outside or at least create the illusion that you are if you don't want to. If she is silent, you too keep silent, if she no want cook, oga, it is either you cook, learn how to or eat outside. Even when she cooks, you go and buy your ingredients and cool yours, and stop giving her money for food. It is very simple. Haba!

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

You want things done decently in YOUR family.
Does the family consist of one person alone? Since it is YOUR family, she has left you emotionally so you can go have intimacy with yourself. Pun intended.

You can’t be hurting her and expect her to be happy with you.

As a lady, I won't advise you to go because in some situation, the wife family suppose to respect their daughter's husband no matter the issue. You have been there before, they call you again which is ridiculous, they should be the one to come to your house with there daughter to apologize even if you are at fault BUT, go for the last time cos if you are not present there the woman may blame you and her family will say you are at fault, they may even call you a Coward.

Misterone:
stop giving stupid advise. ask her! ask her what? after about 2 family meetings? come! take time o.

Must you insult? Well, it's the nature of sinful man. I urge you to surrender your life to Christ.

Ken4Christ:


Must you insult? Well, it's the nature of sinful man. I urge you to surrender your life to Christ.

where is the insult in my post? I never said you were stupid, I said stop giving stupid advise.

Hunmmm.. Nothing depressed a man than a lady to tell him she doesn't love him anymore.
Bro, attend the meeting if you're capable to make her love you back.

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family
which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

Another Bobo Don d nak her secretly or probably making her happy via online apps.. Shine your eyes bros

Bros, see uncle yul edochie has just set a bold example.

On a more serious note, that woman will frustrate hell out of you.Mark my words.It is not a curse.

This is just the beginning. I know you want a decent and stable family life, but not all women want that.Some are married by their husbands, they refused to marry the so called husband.Their eyes still dey outside.

My advice go hard but oga start to dey learn to commot ya mind for that marriage, because she go do u worse in the coming months.

Start investing in yourself and do things that will bring happiness to you.As for ya madam, she don already divorce you emotionally. If you no do thesame, your mental health go collapse soon.

Sorry for the trouble sha.

Control freak oshi. "Decently and in order" ko. Kidult.

Sominablack:
Thanks all for the advice, I appreciate. But as it is now, am no longer interested in the relationship any longer, how can I do with my daughter of 7years that's the only issue bothering me now, cos I dont want her to influence her negatively.

y are you giving up already? � Have you call your wife one on one and asked her why she doesn't love or feel anything for you again? Try hear from hear before you back out

People forget attraction is both way.. but I discovered that in Africa we tend to think it’s all on the man to love a woman and keep doing things to pay for the love of the woman..
And this is usually a disaster.. you are dating a lady she’s playing hard to get yet she as someone else who she loves but do not care about her.. so when that one is not available any more.. the available becomes the desired… and u think ohh I have her now.. nahhh.. u are the option..and option would usually remain option.. unless God is involved..

Kobojunkie:
Interesting take!

Meh u follow this take.. you are in big trouble oo..
Relationship should be mutual ooo..

sehin79:
Meh u follow this take.. you are in big trouble oo..
Relationship should be mutual ooo..

There are many things relationships should be that relationships particularly amongst Nigerians are not, Respect as you said ought to be mutual, however it almost never is because culturally it is accorded to one partner over the other in marriage and so the other partner is left to suffer in marriages.

Given the unconventional nature of existence in Nigerian marriages, it makes sense to look out for and take interest in ideas that may work when commonsense is all but absent.