₦airaland Forum

My kind of phobia. I hate traveling on Nigeria roads, especially at nights.
I hate long journey too.

My brother you are a compound fool ....
Y leave a good girl.

oldienavie:
I know it sounds ridiculous, but the phobia is strong. I know how hard it is to come across good girls in Nigeria, at the same time the thought of being on that road, especially when it's time to bring my family on that journey kinda scares me.

That's your intuition or subconsciousness giving you a forewarning, do not ignore it.

Holluwhakemmy:
These are not genuine reasons we are all managing here in Nigeria, try and adapt no more room for any phobia

Until you have been in his shoes and experience phobia - You cannot be dismissive of his fears. They are real. He is seeking solutions to overcome them.

Op has a legitimate fear.

But there is a greater fear of letting a good lady go because of lesser fear. Have you ever heard Nigerians say: fear women?

A good lady is hard to find these days in Nigeria. Introduction, Wedding or Marriage is not everyday. Let her know your fear so that you do not have to travel much.

Weigh your fears and ignore lesser fear to marry a good woman.

braine:
Your fears are legit, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Nigerian roads are a mess, plus the insecurity.

But then, what must be done, must be done. You can hire private security if you can afford it. Marriage is done once (at least), so it may be worth the investment.

wonlasewonimi:
You have to understand that most nigerians are not rational thinkers that's why you're getting all these idiotic feedbacks. Your life is more important than any girl's whether a virgin or like Toke makinwa. Just let her go and find a woman where you would be comfortable commuting to in order to have a heathy and safe relationship.

You said it better. Nigerians just don't think rationally. That's also why the country is in the mess it is, no doubt. Dude's fears are legit. But it seems no one, at least not many people, care about the several unavoidable deaths on Nigerian roads daily. They believe it will never happen to them until it does.

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

Come let me hold your hand throughout the 4hr trip and help you with your phobia for Nigerian roads.

What sort of a man are you though?

You are scared of Nigerian roads and your girl's area due to the rate of kidnappings and stuff yet you came back from a certain "abroad"

Why not engage the services of security personnel to accompany on the journey as well as ensuring the driver drives within a respectable speed.

You do not have to drive fast neither do you have to drive slow.

Even if you choose to drive at 50km/hr for a 4hr journey you would get to your destination same day with full security personnel accompaniment to take your fears.

I doubt this is about a certain phobia alone.

Small children with phones typing nonsense.....

superCleanworks:
You don't have ballz to make the trip.
You also don't have the ballz to open your mouth and tell her to shift. You don't have ballz to talk.

Tomorrow if they call men to come out you too will carry your two left feet and come out.

exactly, Grow some balls and go see the girl you like man. If you perish you perish.

oldienavie:
I know it sounds ridiculous, but the phobia is strong. I know how hard it is to come across good girls in Nigeria, at the same time the thought of being on that road, especially when it's time to bring my family on that journey kinda scares me.

you are marrying her and not her parents. You only plough that road when you want . You can go a year without going to your wife’s place . Talk to her about this, her reaction and reply will guide you from there, not online advise and certainly not Nairaland .

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

nothing wrong with that. it takes 2 to tango.

if u can't deal with the distance or find a way around it let her be.

How to tell her? She's a virgin so nothing really has happened. just let her know u don't feel comfortable taking those long journeys just to see her or her parents with how Nigeria currently is.

I also don't like travelling certain areas unless I find a convenient way around it.

I can't deal with the stress abeg

Op you remind me of that year wey we dey follow mubo graveyard Road for night from our school to go meet our banny for our lady girls school odo-ona, omor niggaz no dey even get any fear, and last last nah only kiss we go still chop sef... simping years

You sound like someone who is incapable of solving the most obvious problems that face him.

So sad.

Even before I finished reading your write up the obvious solution to your predicament flashed.

So I'm shocked that you can't do same and want to dump an apparently good girl for such a flimsy reason.

When it's time to go see her parents you organise military boys to escort you.

At least 6 heavily armed boys in a Hilux.

You drive behind them and if there's any trouble you turn back when you hear gunfire.

Problem solved.

Good Girls are rare.

Although I'm assuming you can identify one and are not being fooled.

The chances that you can appear slim though but If she's a good one you don't let her go because it's easier to find a pin in a haystack.

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

Opp, can you do me a favour.

Just break up with her and give me her number let me continue from where you stop.

Thank.

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

You are highly unserious!

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

OP like this I am on my way going back to Abuja from Bauchi..... Guess what? Nah woman Carry me come.

I have phobia traveling too esp amist all these insurgencies and insecurities. But some time in life you have to live for the course of somethings....

We actually have a schedule for that. Is either I go over or she comes over.

Las Las Love nah scam.

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

Good ladies are very, very scarce.
That is my own warning to you.
A guy can be bad, but once marriage starts the natural tendancy for responsibility and accountability usually automatically changes him.
A bad woman only hides her badness for a while. It comes out when there is an issue at home.

oldienavie:
You are missing the point, I have a phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, I avoid it as much as I can. Infact I have been in Naija almost 6 months and am not planning to travel out of this city.
When going to Lagos I use the train or fly if thats an option.

Now to bring all my family on that route for an occasion like marriage, would mean I have to ply that road up to 10 times at least going back and forth with family.
That scares me.

Out of all the phobias I've seen, never have I come across "phobia of travelling in Nigeria roads". In conclusion, you are only constituting nuisance in a cyber space, get off nairaland and go get a life

God bless you dear.
Nawaoh

dobnina:
Don't lose a good woman because of a trivial issue that is not her fault.
If you have a good woman, pls hold her tight because there is nothing outside anymore. Good women are scarce this days.
You might feel you will get someone better but my dear, you might get someone worse and you will end up regretting.

Let me ask you a question
Do you drive?
If yes, have you stopped driving cos cars are prone to accidents?
Have you stopped flying cos airplanes crash?
Have you stopped living in your house cos armed robbers might come to your house and attack you at night?

If the answers are No, then you shouldn't get scared of travelling.
Just try to be safe by travelling during the day.
Pray to God for protection and remove the fear from your mind.

Truth is, anything that will happen will surely happen.
Just seek protection from God when travelling.
Overcome your fear and don't lose a good woman cos of that.

MyChoice1:
You have a valid point to be scared. It's one thing to love and another thing to be realistic to what operates within your environment. Recently I read online about a soldier who resigned from his work because of his love affair with his fiancee, and lately upon taking his whole family to the East for wedding things, UGM attacked and killed him and his lady. His family members are now in captivity! Tell me now, was that love venture beneficial to that man in any way? Use your head, because tomorrow the woman will use it as a case that you don't visit her parents bla bla bla hence you don't love her...shor! She will definitely be taking her kids to visit her parents, will you stop her? Use your head bro. Plenty good girls still dey, don't be deceived.

This incident really shock me.

Let me even throw in a situation right now Mr.A is from the North Central and has vested interested in a Lady from the South East.In light of recent events playing in the south East ;insecurity how will he go about performing the Traditional marriage rites.

Enny2013:
My kind of phobia. I hate traveling on Nigeria roads, especially at nights.
I hate long journey too.

Aunty shut up and simply say you hate traveling. Which one is "I hate travelling on Nigeria roads" what makes the road in Nigeria so different from the ones in other countries.
Mtcheew

oldienavie:
You are missing the point, I have a phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, I avoid it as much as I can. Infact I have been in Naija almost 6 months and am not planning to travel out of this city.
When going to Lagos I use the train or fly if thats an option.

Now to bring all my family on that route for an occasion like marriage, would mean I have to ply that road up to 10 times at least going back and forth with family.
That scares me.

It is a pity you brought up this topic , it is like you want to prove your ego. Are you alien to Nigeria that you developed so much phobia? Everything depends on luck people are being killed kidnapped, maimed and assaulted in the cities too train are attacked even the airport is not full prove of safety. The infatuation with the girl being a virgin and of good manner is good but don't be disappointed that you may be disappointed later in life . If you want to marry go ahead and stop disturbing the forum with your correctional attitude coming on net you must be accommodative to abuse and praises

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

If you are buoyant you can work with the woman to solve this problem and you two may need to be patient. Get an apartment for your lady in a high profile area in cities like Abuja or Lagos where the roads are very good and the ambience suits you. Then work with your woman to gradually make her parents get used to visiting her at her residence and spending time there until they consider moving there permanently. You can then make your way down there, finalize all wedding plans there and take your woman with you. After taking your woman with you you could decide to keep financing the apartment you got in a high profile area if your woman's parents intend to keep living there or you could work with your woman to work outa different solution.

I don’t know where you live anyways but I did my traditional marriage in Anambra from Lagos, went there with my family and came back safe and sound. We didn’t go in our own private cars though, I used God is Good Transport because they use the road everyday and know how the road is. Don’t let your girl go because of something you can control.

blazingblender:
My friend go and sit down
Your girlfriend is the one who doesn't deserve you sef
You are having phobia travelling on Nigeria road
Asif the country you live in you guys fly around..
Secondly I believe the abroad you are even talking about may be one of this closeby African countries like Cotonou
Si if you don't come back home where do u wanna retire??
Or you think we living here are asshol*$?

No mind the dude
Flight no abi em wan just dey form

oldienavie:
Ondo State.

Ondo State is even better than these Northern states where I live and we're still balling to God's glory.
My candid advice?
Pray to God for His protection, discuss with your family and embark on that journey.
I so much believe in Christ such that I wouldn't break a sweat if I was in your shoe to embark on such journey.
You aren't even safe by air or train if God isn't protecting you.

Plus, Do know that good stuffs don't come easy, hence don't let no phobia deber you from what you know it's yours already.
May God help you pull through.

Does Ondo state really have any serious security issues? Just asking. Your fears are exaggerated. If you keep living under this bondage of unfounded fears, it will take a whole lot for you to maximize your years on earth.

Then book a flight

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

bro I had exactly same issue. I had feelings for someone in a different state notwithstanding we haven't been together that long. I really wish to settle with her but the distance that might take hours and the security situation in Nigeria currently especially in the east isn't giving any joy. So I summoned the courage one day to let her know I can't embark on such distance. I felt broken though but I thought to myself " to love is sweet but to live is sweeter" I cant risk lives going that distance for about more than 10hrs (to and fro) in a day traveling to go pick a woman.

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

I realized you're not serious since you refer to a 3 months relationship partner as perfect, OP you have alot to learn

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.


I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

Is like you just found out the meaning of phobia and you jst want to make a story essay out of it .
But check e never reach 1000words

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

Please And please bro.. let me have your virgin for keeps.. i promise to love her more than you do.