₦airaland Forum

Herculex03:
We Christians when no be simps Where we come dey ??

michigang:
for us that are looking forward to having a girlfriend. is it okay to approach and toast a girl you saw on the street knowing fully well you may never see her again?

heartofcity12:
Blame the dude that keeps himself in the friendzone for that long. If she can’t accept you in her prime, don’t accept her in her decline. She only came back after exhausting her options, he’s not her priority. It’s high interest or nothing.

Smartb0y:
See this where we get it all mixed up bro.
It is as a matter of fact a fat deal.

When you operate on the grounds of cold approaching, you're working on 20% to 80% rule.

Even if you're the softest guy in the whole world, that girl with no value can rubbish you anyhow she likes yet you talk about it raising your confidence.
I mean how does that even sound in your mouth

Confidence is gotten from within not without.if you're not confident talking to a girl,then something must be very wrong in your life.

Let's call a spade a spade.

Stop trying to fill a void by talking to multiple women, it's not going to change anything.

Work on yourself,is it money that's your problem.... hustle and get that bag,the confidence will come

Is it sexual (health wise), seek medical help, confidence will come


Always try to narrow down why you're having confidence issue.
It has nothing to do with that girl, the problem lies within your subconscious.
Until you stop deluding yourself, you'll think talking to girls is a problem.


When she gives you green light, your odds are greatly improved, we talking about a 60% to 40% rule here. 60% being yours, that's if you're not even all round sexy.

Let's stop deluding ourselves,the disparity between cold approaching and green light is enormous.

We come on here almost everyday talking about how we must rise above women and be better but we still keep using the tools that enables them to best us most of the time.

Come on man ,we can do better.

Winnerly:
As a former proponent of cold approaching, i now support you 100% and i apologise for my part in encouraging men to cold approach. Don’t do it. It’s a new day, it’s nolonger the 90’s and even 2000’s.

Cold approaching is like a confidence transfer. You leave the situation feeling a little worse about yourself if she acts snubbish (which happens most of the time) and she leaves feeling a little better about herself, hence many ladies walking with an exaggerated sense of self.

It’s true that if you talk to 6 ladies, 2 may agree but you don’t really remain thesame guy you were after the 4 rude encounters. Your self esteem will take a hit. Now for the 2 that gels with you, you’re starting off from a disadvantaged position, thus making it super hard to maintain frame.

LordAdam16:
Apologies for the delay in my response.

As always, I'll open with a disclaimer (when necessary):

I'm MGTOW. By default, I'm a proponent of 1 Corinthians 7:1. As such, it's fair to actively parse my comment for bias and I may not be the best person to listen to on purple pill matters.

That said, the good thing is quite a portion--if not a majority of commercially successful media personalities in the manosphere are purple-pillers. So there isn't a shortage of good advice from folks who've taken the same path you intend to and who you might better relate with on shared experiences.

Take this remarkable comment by pansophist for example ('twas a response to yet another blue-pilled complainant):



If you need a precis or a pocketbook guide to committed relationships for a redpiller in the 21st century, importantly by someone who is walking the talk, that's as concise as it'd get.

The template is reproducible and easy to grasp.

A: Be certain of what you want.
B. Know what you'd compromise on and what you wouldn't compromise on.
C. Be willing to take your leave if she fails to meet her end of the bargain on a key benefit in the "no compromise" column.

===

Now, maybe you want to hear what I have to say on the subject. In which case, I'd oblige.

I'd answer your question first. Then touch on the wider subject matter for emphasis

---

Your question was:



Seeking women who are into the culture of previous generations is still possible in traditional climes like ours. However, times are changing for everyone and she'll inevitably be influenced by the changes. Especially if you reside in an urban setting or your own attempts at self-improvement offer her the opportunity to see first-hand what 'modern' women are up to and the complete insanity they can get away with.

Now you might be fortunate that she stays traditional ad infinitum. But the odds of that are low.

---

You may have heard the expression:

Hard times create strong men, Strong men create good times, Good times create weak men, and Weak men create hard times.

This is relevant because by definition, culture is the way of life of a particular group of people. We are at the "good times create weak men" stage, which explains the changing culture. Thinking you can flip the script as a one-man army is wishful thinking.

To be accurate, we've been down this road before. In times of weariness and disaster, women don't care about rights. They just want to be safe and have access to resources. Of course, men have to bear the brunt of it and pay with our lives. However, when hard times are over and things are blissful, they get their rights without much prodding.

Ancient Egyptian women during the Middle Kingdom had more rights than modern Egyptian women. Why wouldn't they? The Empire was the dominant power on the planet, there was zero unemployment, little to no social mobility, and the concept of Ma'at meant everyone knew their place and their roles in keeping the empire running.
Spartan women had more rights than Athenian and even Persian women. Why wouldn't they? Their men subjugated a slave population that outnumbered the native Spartan population and they were feared on the battlefield. Like today with Western women having machines perform all their menial tasks. Spartan women had slaves do all their menial tasks.
Likewise with Roman women (citizens) compared to their contemporaries.

With the end of World War II and the ensuing prosperity and bliss, the same thing is happening with Western women.

===

Now in the past, because of existential threats, there were hard limits to how much leeway women could get when times were good.

Today, most of those existential threats are no more with sovereignty, rules of engagement, war crimes, the ratification of fundamental human rights, mutually assured destruction and other fail-safe mechanisms.

As such, eventually that culture of previous generations that you fondly reminisce about will die out as simping becomes the gold standard. And those of us who live in urban settings or in the West/West-leaning conclaves are on the front-row.

This explains why it is not accurate to use some of the enduring longstanding marriages of yesteryears as templates for today. Ma Adeboye will not tell Pa Adeboye to go sleep on the couch after an argument. Joke Silva does not expect Olu Jacobs to share the chores 50:50. So while they celebrate their golden jubilees and you're fantasizing about replicating it or using them as #relationshipgoals, understand that the pillars and culture that made that possible are not available to you.

To get to that same point, be prepared to be chewed inside out and embark on a wildly different and rigorous journey.

===

Thus, if you still decide to go for committed relationships, even though contemporary culture puts you at a disadvantage; the last thing you want to do is hope to find a unicorn. The idea of unicorns is that they're rare. Not enough to go round, are always sought after even if they're spoken for, and that at the end of the day, they're still horses.

A traditional woman is still a woman. And to give a lucid instance, most of the diaspora men who failed to realize that fact by inviting "women who are into the culture of previous generations" from Nigeria were sharply lectured with cold, hard horror experiences.

The best you can do is prepare for the worst and hope for the best.

Mind you, this is not as nihilistic as it sounds. This is not to mean that you would not have happy times in a committed relationship or marriage as a purple-piller. Especially if you continue to improve yourself and apply TRP nuggets shared here.

Heck, there are a lot of purple-pillers who say the good times are worth the risk and eventual lull periods. In any case, it's not my place to question your reality. That's one of the few good things about the current climate and one I hope more TRPillers take advantage of, you're at liberty to do whatever makes you happy.

Just remember that as investment bankers say "past performance is no guarantee of future results" and ensure you've made appropriate preparations or contingency plans should you become a statistic. Because we only hear complaints after the women have showed their wild side. But when modern men are feeling like Jay Z thinking they have their partners wrapped around their fingers, rather than make hay while the sun shines, they're usually reckless both in words and deeds.

Don't be reckless.

1. Enter every relationship with a clear idea of what you expect to get out of it and what you can reasonably expect to sacrifice.

If you're going in because you prefer to raise your kids in a nuclear family and are willing to sacrifice your individuality, many of your dreams, some of your cherished friendships, amongst many other things. Then by the gods, if years later she becomes insufferable that it begins to affect the family unit and your kids well being, read her the Riot Act.

2. I have to repeat this, have a clear idea of what you can reasonably expect to sacrifice.

Everything has a price. Including entering a marriage or a committed relationship. It might not sound like a big deal now. But 12 years later, you'd wake up, look at her face as she sleeps and wonder "how the f*ck was I so arrogant to believe I could deal with this sh*t for decades".

3. If you're improving yourself, she should be too.

If you choose to overlook this or tolerate her nasty, that's your prerogative and should be your choice. Don't be knackered into believing that while you're working on yourself and literally sucking up to your boss to maintain your lifestyle and not lose her, that her flaws are a package deal that you MUST accept without her even attempting to work on them.

In the 21st century, that's a pile of crap. If marriage is work, you should not be the only one stacking bricks.

4. Live in the moment, enjoy the little things, and soak up the experiences.

Because it might not last, it might be all that gets you through the bad times, it might be your only respite when you look back on your misadventure, or even be a critical reason why your marriage, civil union, or committed relationship lasts.

5. Have an insurance plan.

Whether it's walking away, getting a mistress, separation, signing a prenup if you're in the diaspora, having a sizable nest egg that can't be touched even if she goes scorched earth; never as a rule of thumb let yourself be at the mercy of a woman (or any human being for that matter).

Don't tempt fate! And don't let anyone guilt-trip you into thinking looking out for yourself means you don't "love" her enough. That should go both ways, if she "loves" you enough, she should want you to be happy if things don't work out.

6. Doing all these things and more does not guarantee anything.

People discover new things about themselves. Circumstances change and people react differently to change. Also, everyone has a breaking point.

===

In fairness, I'll admit, it is depressing.

Most guys out there are just looking for dependable companionship, respect, and appreciation and are willing to walk to the ends of the earth for any woman who'd provide that or even the mere illusion of that. Unfortunately, they have to go searching through treacherous terrain for something their grand and great grand fathers probably took for granted.

That said, in the voice of Eneke the Bird, "Since [hunters] have learned to shoot without missing, I have learned to fly without perching."

Be like Eneke the Bird.

-Lord

Nyascobar1414:
Lmaoo...
You are not a good Christian...
You have to be nice and kind to the other gender sir...




Kikkiiiikiiiii

Herculex03:
I no be fool abeg Women no be good people

Nyascobar1414:
Be kind sir....
Be your sisters keeper....
Be nice and worship em, a woman carried you for 9months...
A good christian cherish females...







You cant see through the sarcasm bro....


Real niggas dont gv a fvvk bout em.....

Let em all geddifok, those girls are all selfish...
Its all game, tryna game em....



TRP is Golden.

Herculex03:
Instead of walking into a pit and then getting out,I now see the pit from afar and simply avoid it
TRP is the best thing to happen to me

Lightheaded:
Lol, that would be taking things seriously. No go carry girl matter for head.

I'll never be found in two extremes, saying 'I love you' and 'I hate you'. That's being dramatic, leave emotions for women. There are other ways of making a lady show if she's chosen you, just withdraw the little attention you used to give and watch her display.

When a lady says "I hate you" and is nevertheless still engaging with you, it means:
I hate you because you are different from other guys and I don't get my way when I'm with you.
I hate you because you make me feel like I've never felt before and do the things I didn't think I'd do, some may even outrightly say " I never thought I'd do this",
I hate you because other guys treat me like a princess but you don't give two f*cks, You're not a nice guy.
I hate you because even though you don't care, I care and I keep coming back to you.
I hate you because you tease me too much and don't praise me.

Regardless of that, they'd still seek your attention.

Normally I just smirk and move on with the conversation, no 'why do you hate me?' crap.

She doesn't hate you, she hates herself for liking you.

heartofcity12:
Trust females at your peril.

Winnerly:
As a former proponent of cold approaching, i now support you 100% and i apologise for my part in encouraging men to cold approach. Don’t do it. It’s a new day, it’s nolonger the 90’s and even 2000’s.

Cold approaching is like a confidence transfer. You leave the situation feeling a little worse about yourself if she acts snubbish (which happens most of the time) and she leaves feeling a little better about herself, hence many ladies walking with an exaggerated sense of self.

It’s true that if you talk to 6 ladies, 2 may agree but you don’t really remain thesame guy you were after the 4 rude encounters. Your self esteem will take a hit. Now for the 2 that gels with you, you’re starting off from a disadvantaged position, thus making it super hard to maintain frame.

TMTR:
Avoid single mothers like a plaque , if she is a window, investigate what killed her husband so that what killed him won't also kill you.

In fact just avoid single mothers no matter the circumstances for your own good.

Don't say you weren't warned , my elder brother almost lost his life last month because of a single mother, I warned him but he wouldn't listen ,now that experience has taught him a bitter lesson, he knows better and now takes every word I say as law...

JESHAL:
DON'T SPEND TOO MUCH TIME TRYING TO FIGURE A WOMAN OUT. PEDESTALIZING A WOMAN IN YOUR MIND, LEADS TO PEDESTALIZING HER WITH YOUR BEHAVIORS. ASK YOURSELF THIS QUESTION: "WHILE I AM SPENDING MY TIME THINKING ABOUT HER, IS SHE SPENDING TIME THINKING ABOUT ME?"

fmighty:
Thank you. I did already broke up with her though but just wanted to know if I’m not making a wrong move. I know she’s a Virgin and can’t vouch for that and not only is she a virgin, she’s never been sexually involve with someone else before.

Anyway, thank you for your advice.

heartofcity12:
Maintain frame always..

adeotiabdulaziz:
looking at ur own cv too, we are not surprised why you have been rejected by several men( ur husband and mejiloyon). Pple like you come online to project your frustrations, failures and bitterness from your failed marriage and very foolish pple will be following you.

temi1290:
The only type of meat you should run away from is processed meat eg hot dog, canned beef,as far as you're using the right type of oil, you are good to go

dotunibrahim7:
Nice write up bro. Now what type of oil is the right oil?

ProphetJeroboam:
Hungry man mentality. Trust me when you have enough money for food, you’ll realize that food isn’t meant to be taken as luxury.