Atolu01:
"Women age faster than men". How won't they. If you were saddled with yourself and your nonsense of diverse kinds, wouldn't you age and drain fast. Useless draining parasitic self centered cowardly opportunists. Story sounds almost incredible. Sorry about your experiences. At 24? Hm. The Gaslighting, heavy manipulation and victim blaming/ shaming on this thread is sickening. OP will deliver soundly and safely in Jesus mighty name. The spouse should sort out his mess. Just irresponsibly shifting responsibility up and down.

Amen thank you I am not afraid my God will never failed me he cannot punish me for someone else responsibility.

Yes I can't afford it too because I am not working due to my condition [/quote]





What were you doing before you got pregnant?

CSTRR:

I am not asking her to stay.

I only told her to partake in the healing streams program by pastor Chris taking place today at 3pm online.

She will lay hands on that child when prayer is going forth and a miracle can happen.

If nothing change, she can still leave.
I have no problem with that.

Why don’t you go to OPs house and lay the healing hands? Or you don’t trust your faith that much?

Nozino:


And if anything happens to her, they will say you killed her. That you never liked her

Kill her for what ? Is she an orphan ? She has a father and mother . She is not my responsibility please stop making me guilty as if It's me who birth her.

generalwo:
......na u know.... All i know be say marriage these days no be for better for worst... Na for better only and this woman is a proof of that...

Which kind for better for worse? She wasn't part of this, she wasn't told anything. Why would she be held responsible for kid whose mother abandoned? You're wicked somebody.

I'm sure if the man was as wealthy as otedola... Who has a kid with almost same ailment, she won't leave him for anything.... But because the man no get money... All of a sudden... She can't mother a kid with a disorder..... Na all of una know... Make she dey go.... The man no go die... Neither will the kid.....

The kid will either be taken to a facility where she will be adequately catered for by professionals. Or, many house helps will be hired to responsible for her care.

The man will meet a better woman who will accept him and his kid ... U wen get comprehending ability... Go use am boil beans

That is the point of the whole argument here. This woman was not told about the existing marriage and the kid, she wasn't prepared. That kid is a responsibility of her mother, not hers. Thanks

Femifasola:

Your write up is null and void. The child was dumped by the mother so she's not in the place to take of another woman's child.
Hello! If you so care lease your sister to go take care of the physically challenged child

Keep betraying Christ with your words and same time coming online to rant about the Muslim-Muslim ticket. I have never seen a land populated by more hypocrites than Nigeria.
Act like Christ, Never! Okay attack adherents of other religions, Yes, let the war begin already!

paris7968:
Yes I can't afford it too because I am not working due to my condition





What were you doing before you got pregnant?

Hairdresser and make up artist

Nozino:



Carry the cross the owner rejected?? Wow!!! It’s how you people are not asking the husband to take care of his child!! It isn’t OP’s responsibility, the birth mother has tried. It is his turn. He should take care of his child.

Alternatively. Seeing a you’re such a good Christian with so much love to give, why don’t you adopt the child? No? Now get out.

Keep betraying Christ with your words and same time coming online to rant about the Muslim-Muslim ticket. I have never seen a land populated by more hypocrites than Nigeria.
Act like Christ, Never! Okay attack adherents of other religions, Yes, let the war begin already!

Richy4:

Ok.. it seems your mind is made up already... U are the one wearing the shoes and u alone knows where it hurts...

But let me ask you again..
<<Is leaving him and the marriage really what you want?...
<<You don't think it's a hasty decision that you are making at the moment?...
<<Are you 100% certain that you are leaving without a backward glance/ no coming back when things becomes Rosey and better for your husband?..

If all the answers are yea then I really wish U the best dear..and take care of your unborn baby..

The oloshi get man e want go dey knack!!! Useless generation of women!!

The girl is a special need child and she needs professional attention like speech therapist, physiotherapist etc so the service is usually expensive. I will meet with a professional before tomorrow to give an informed advise to you.

GraciousVictor:
is this your first time of interacting with jovialjune1?
lol my mother was sent packing from her husband, my father's house after the DNA tests revealed that I am not the son of my father.
The useless man I once called my father got angry and kicked my mother's ass out.
Ever since she has been frustrated and I always tend to bring my mother's failed marital life to this forum.
That thread where i exposed my mother's secrets was deleted by the mods, go through my posts you'll see how frustrated I am.
Just ignore me

Fixed.

H0711:


You are also a woman you are saying this because you are not in her shoe trust me it is not easy . I have done it for a week and I gave up and what about her who has been doing it for 7 good years. I don't blame her they made her together so they should share her responsibility.

Yes I'm not in her shoes so i may not fully understand but i feel your presence in that house was a deciding factor for her and the reason your mother-in-law is not willing to help.

H0711:


Amen thank you I am not afraid my God will never failed me he cannot punish me for someone else responsibility.

Amen. Trust you are resting where you are.

H0711:


No problem only God know the real truth if I was a bad wife or not , you can say whatever you like about me it is your opinion and you are entitled to it. Action speaks louder than words if you care enough come and take care of her

madam dey go abeg, I have my own issues to attend to, if I had an idea u were gonna react in this manner I for just waka passsssss. I wish you d best in your decisions, you're an adult!

By November I will get back to you. I am following the issue up. That child needs love and care.

H0711:


Kill her for what ? Is she an orphan ? She has a father and mother . She is not my responsibility please stop making me guilty as if It's me who birth her.

You don’t know Nigerians. The people asking you to care for her will turn against you at the slightest convenience. Dealing with other peoples children is a rocky path, dealing with other peoples special needs children is a no go area. Even if both parents are dead, any grandparents from either the maternal or paternal side should take over.

Yeyeoldman:


Keep betraying Christ with your words and same time coming online to rant about the Muslim-Muslim ticket. I have never seen a land populated by more hypocrites than Nigeria.
Act like Christ, Never! Okay attack adherents of other religions, Yes, let the war begin already!

All this rubbish on top go and adopt the child? Get out for the last time.

He built the foundation of your marriage with lies. I hope your unborn child is okay too. Please don't suffer in the name of marriage. Good luck and safe delivery. Also never tell someone you are leaving them. They will plan to hurt you.

H0711:
I got married two months ago. I am 7 months pregnant my husband didn't tell me he had a child from his previous relationship and the child has a disability celebral palsy. Her mother came to dropped her off in my house saying she has done enough and she's tired it is now hubby turn to take care of her.

The child can't do anything for herself she can't sit, talk, walk and she does toilet in her clothes. I can't do it anymore I love children because I have taken care of my own nieces and nephews before I would have taken care of her if she was normal but taking care of a child in this question is hard and if her own mother has had enough she abandoned her and why would I kill myself taking care of her in my condition.

I want to divorce and go back to my village I have told him i am leaving next month. He is pleading with me not to leave him that he will take the child somewhere else but the place is not free he has to be paying like 200k monthly for them to take care of the child and he doesn't even have that amount of money because he is not financial stable.

I will stick to my decision but I want to know what will other people do in my situation.

As long as you ANSWER YES TO THIS QUESTION, YOU SHOULD DIVORCE HIM BECAUSE he/She who can not accept the BLAMES DO NOT DECERVE THE FAME OOOO.

Are you 100% certain that you are leaving without a backward glance/ no coming back when things becomes Rosey and better for your husband?..

Nozino:



You don’t know Nigerians. The people asking you to care for her will turn against you at the slightest convenience. Dealing with other peoples children is a rocky path, dealing with other peoples special needs children is a no go area. Even if both parents are dead, any grandparents from either the maternal or paternal side should take over.

I agreed with you. Can you imagine my mother in law has even refused to release her daughter who is the child aunty to come and help and why should I kill myself for her when her both parents are alive and healthy.

Jovialjune1:


Fixed.

okay

Some of you are funny o .
I love the way OP is replying some of you that want to guilt trip her to stay .
The man abadon the first wife because of his child condition. He then met OP and didn't tell her about his past.
OP entered marriage with a clean mind she married a bachelor , then all of a sudden the man turn to a father overnight not only that but to a special need child that deserve 100% attention 24/7.
So the husband's mother and sister and the first wife are all running from responsibilities of taking care of the child. Even the husband inclusive. But some of y'all here want OP who had no idea that her husband was a father to a special need child to carry the responsibility for the rest of her life. Responsibility that both the biological mother and father are running from .
Omo OP if you want to leave. Leave o. Abeg don't even look back.
The people that want you to stay should come and help you to take care of the child.

usagee36:
He built the foundation of your marriage with lies. I hope your unborn child is okay too. Please don't suffer in the name of marriage. Good luck and safe delivery. Also never tell someone you are leaving them. They will plan to hurt you.

Thank you. He can't hurt me because I am already at my brother place

H0711:


A big Amen

Jovialjune1:



Pls leave.

Since he can keep something as huge as a child, who knows what else he's keeping from you

You are justified to leave abeg.

OP please disregard this my former advice.
Kindly go back and apologize to your husband.
E get why

Duchessree:
Some of you are funny o .
I love the way OP is replying some of you that want to guilt trip her to stay .
The man abadon the first wife because of his child condition. He then met OP and didn't tell her about his past.
OP entered marriage with a clean mind she married a bachelor , then all of a sudden the man turn to a father overnight not only that but to a special need child that deserve 100% attention 24/7.
So the husband mother and sister and the first wife are all running from responsibilities of taking care of the child. Even the husband inclusive. But some of y'all here want OP who had no idea that her husband was a father to a special need child to carry the responsibility for the rest of her life. Responsibility that both the biological mother and father are running from .
Omo OP if you want to leave. Leave o. Abeg don't even look back.
The people that want you to stay should come and help you to take care of the child.

you're a product of a broken home.
I'm not surprised with this rubbish you just typed

maasoap:

Which kind for better for worse? She wasn't part of this, she wasn't told anything. Why would she be held responsible for kid whose mother abandoned? You're wicked somebody.


The kid will either be taken to a facility where she will be adequately catered for by professionals. Or, many house helps will be hired to responsible for her care.



That is the point of the whole argument here. This woman was not told about the existing marriage and the kid, she wasn't prepared. That kid is a responsibility of her mother, not hers. Thanks

.... Boss... We are humans and we adapt..... She wasn't told... The man was wrong about that.... I agree to it.... The issue here is... The kid should not be a reason why she should abandon her home.... The ease with which people walk out of matrimony these days is alarming.... If it's not domestic violence, I believe every other thing can be sorted out with time and understanding...... She didn't say she need time to digest the whole thing... She just wants to leave using the child as an excuse...... I may sound harsh or inconsiderate but I think this is not enough reason to walk out of marriage... So if the next man she will meet has a similar issue.... That's how she will walk out too... Now i know why there are alot of single mothers littering the country.... They look for every excuse to walk out of a marriage

H0711:
I got married two months ago. I am 7 months pregnant my husband didn't tell me he had a child from his previous relationship and the child has a disability celebral palsy. Her mother came to dropped her off in my house saying she has done enough and she's tired it is now hubby turn to take care of her.

The child can't do anything for herself she can't sit, talk, walk and she does toilet in her clothes. I can't do it anymore I love children because I have taken care of my own nieces and nephews before I would have taken care of her if she was normal but taking care of a child in this question is hard and if her own mother has had enough she abandoned her and why would I kill myself taking care of her in my condition.

I want to divorce and go back to my village I have told him i am leaving next month. He is pleading with me not to leave him that he will take the child somewhere else but the place is not free he has to be paying like 200k monthly for them to take care of the child and he doesn't even have that amount of money because he is not financial stable.

I will stick to my decision but I want to know what will other people do in my situation.

Believe me, if you leave that marriage you will regret it later.

This is what will happen when you leave.
1.. your husband will marry another wife and life goes on.
2..That child will be taken care of in that house you ran away from.
3.. you'll look for husband and will not find, you'll be labeled a single mother that was chased out of her husband's house over infidelity

J0vialjune1:


OP please disregard this my former advice.
Kindly go back and apologize to your husband.
E get why

H0711 I stand by my previous comment, a fool actually cloned this account I quoted today, just ignore the dead brain.

Great! Don't lose guard. Be vigilant. The heart of man is desperate.

H0711:


Thank you. He can't hurt me because I am already at my brother place

Duchessree:
Some of you are funny o .
I love the way OP is replying some of you that want to guilt trip her to stay .
The man abadon the first wife because of his child condition. He then met OP and didn't tell her about his past.
OP entered marriage with a clean mind she married a bachelor , then all of a sudden the man turn to a father overnight not only that but to a special need child that deserve 100% attention 24/7.
So the husband mother and sister and the first wife are all running from responsibilities of taking care of the child. Even the husband inclusive. But some of y'all here want OP who had no idea that her husband was a father to a special need child to carry the responsibility for the rest of her life. Responsibility that both the biological mother and father are running from .
Omo OP if you want to leave. Leave o. Abeg don't even look back.
The people that want you to stay should come and help you to take care of the child.

Thank you . I am already at my brother place I am not living here until thrusday when I will go to the village. Yes ooo if they care more about the child they should come and take care of her while I am gone. All the child need right now is people like them who will care for her without a single complain about it being hard.

My take:

If he could hide something as huge as a child's case from you, I fear that he may have bigger, precarious things hidden from you.

My biggest fear is that he might hurt you. In fact, there's every tendency that he will. Watch your back from now on. Be very careful, even when you finally decide to go pack your things. Please, never be alone at any time with him.

Jovialjune1:



H0711 I stand by my previous comment, a fool actually cloned this account I quoted today, just ignore the dead brain.

No problem thanks