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Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by blaise26abj(m): 10:49am On Aug 08, 2022
15thAccount:
Better days ahead bro. One thing I’ll say is don’t feel inferior because of clothes and gadgets.

I buried myself in a cave for most of my life due to Sapa, I didn’t go out, no one invited me to events and I wouldn’t have honored any because I felt I wasn’t good enough.

There are people with a lot less than what you have currently but they give out so much positive energy and are genuinely happy. I envy these guys, you’ll see the way they laugh and crack jokes and think they have everything good in the world.

You even get android, I almost don’t have any picture from the past 9 years, since it was the small “palasa” phones I kept managing.

I won’t lie nice clothes and gadgets are useful and are nice to have but don’t disconnect from everyone because you feel inferior. Even when money comes, the damage you’ll do to your mental health now might not be easy to fix.

Stay positive while you grind bro. Better days ahead.


Networking is one of the few ways to unfriend Sapa . No matter how introverted you are ( I am one terrible introvert too ) , you NEED to go out and meet USEFUL people ! I can testify to that !
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Samskid310(m): 10:51am On Aug 08, 2022
I just won $10m
Send aza for a cut

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by lendahand(m): 10:52am On Aug 08, 2022
Sheistoopretty:


The big question is; what are you doing Right now? Are you making any moves to level up? undecided
BBN addict spotted
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by IgiveLadiesBj(m): 10:52am On Aug 08, 2022
peacettw:
This was the story of my life a few years till I decided to make a few drastic changes. I implore you to do the same
What was the changes you made if you don't mind? And how did it turn out?

1 Like

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Zulu2022: 10:54am On Aug 08, 2022
Don't feel less of ursef or wat ppl will say,get up and make a move,take charge of ur life,do extraordinary tin to get wat others ain't getting..if u continue sitting in house doing nothing,there is no way money go fly com meet u bro...na person de like u de build house,Liv comfortable,meet ur friends way grab bars,b loyal to them,beg Dem to put u through,mk ur life change
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by apache22b: 10:55am On Aug 08, 2022
AMEN


Gandollaar:
Amen
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by pharmaking: 10:57am On Aug 08, 2022
U better like yourself the way u are.

I no dey look person face, cos I am not living to impress.

I don't care what about you wear or use.I bought iPhone 4s in 2020 because I love the sleeky design.If you like hiss.

I drive 1995 Rover 620si around, if u like no enter if I stop for u.

I am solely responsible for my happiness. No inferiority complex.

3 Likes

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by realestate99: 10:59am On Aug 08, 2022
Kokaine:
you know what can take that feeling off? Volunteer to work for free in hospitals. In your seclusion times, volunteer to visit prisons and donate some clothes you call rags, follow people randomly to the graveyards to bury their loved ones and know that you could be next to be burried on a day you dont know.
That way, you could be in any gathering wearing or holding anything and still keep your head high in dignity.

Yes he can work on that but the issue on ground is the O.p has not been to any gathering for long because of his self imposed exile sponsored by lack of money, it is inevitable to feel awkward that point in time, even if he decides to cover his face with a cloth inorder not to see the material stuffs others are brandishing, the smell of exotic perfumes won't let his soul rest.

I agree, he can really work on that debacle after that incident but trust me , on that day he narrated his reaction was just natural.

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by qtguru(m): 11:00am On Aug 08, 2022
Supreme145:
A close friend of mine invited me to a birthday party he threw for his girlfriend a couple of days ago. I initially declined the invitation but reluctantly agreed when the girl called me personally and pleaded with me to show up.

When it was time to get ready for the party, a peep into my wardrobe reminded me that I had no outing cloths. I hadn't gotten a new cloth for over 4 years. My sapa induced introverted nature somehow masked my need for new stuffs because I hardly go out. A sad reality hit me hard in the face... My two jeans and three tee shirts were badly worn out, no shoes either.

I shaa dressed up and left for the party. I immediately regretted my decision of honouring that invitation immediately I stepped into the venue. I looked so out of place... Guys were all dressed up in nice cloths and latest gadgets, I normally don't let those kinda stuffs bother me but I felt terrible that night.

I sat at a corner observing things till my friend's girlfriend came and yanked me off my seat to take pictures with some of her friends. A friend of hers used an iPhone with three cameras at the back to take the pictures, didn't know the model since both 12 and 13 looks similar.

I went and sat back at my corner till the photo guy came and offered to transfer some of the pictures to me... I hesitated because I knew I didn't want to see the pictures but the guy was persuasive so I gave in. If only I knew the embarrassment that was lying in wait for me.

We proceeded to connect to xender, that was when my antiquated camon CX air that I've been using since 2017 decided to show himself. My phone kept rebooting on its own endlessly till the guy got fed up and left. I was super embarrassed.

My friend still came today to transfer the same pictures to me but I objected vehemently because I looked miserable in all the pictures.
I codedly observed guys in my compound dressed up for church and Sunday outings and came to the conclusion that sapa has been my best friend for a really long while.

HAPPY SUNDAY




Guy na you dey give yourself complex, make do with what you have, people will respect you for it. If someone can judge you on phone then that's a shallow person. But I can relate sha, some parties will make you want to stay at home.
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Fourpockets: 11:03am On Aug 08, 2022
Chloraseptic:
People saying inferiority complex really don't understand what it feels like to be broke.

There's no way you won't feel inferior wearing less quality clothes and no money in the pocket to a gathering of extravaganza lifestyle people.

Most of these people saying inferiority complex wouldn't even attend the party in the first place.

The fact that OP could attend the party shows how confident he could be.

When you are really really broke no amount of faked confidence you have in you, you would still feel inferior one way or another

You hit the nail, 100% solid point
There's nothing like inferiority complex it's just basic human nature

3 Likes

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by triplek2000: 11:03am On Aug 08, 2022
I can relate bro. but no think jare
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Mattwillz: 11:04am On Aug 08, 2022
Samskid310:
Wo no time for long talk Send aza Na person dey help pesin
boss pls help me too make i see food chop thanks uba 2240006110

1 Like

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Papi748637(m): 11:04am On Aug 08, 2022
I feel your pain bro �... You really need a hug �

Stay strong � God no go shame us.

Amen ���
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Papi748637(m): 11:05am On Aug 08, 2022


Na man you be �
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Bullahville: 11:07am On Aug 08, 2022
Supreme145:
A close friend of mine invited me to a birthday party he threw for his girlfriend a couple of days ago. I initially declined the invitation but reluctantly agreed when the girl called me personally and pleaded with me to show up.

When it was time to get ready for the party, a peep into my wardrobe reminded me that I had no outing cloths. I hadn't gotten a new cloth for over 4 years. My sapa induced introverted nature somehow masked my need for new stuffs because I hardly go out. A sad reality hit me hard in the face... My two jeans and three tee shirts were badly worn out, no shoes either.

I shaa dressed up and left for the party. I immediately regretted my decision of honouring that invitation immediately I stepped into the venue. I looked so out of place... Guys were all dressed up in nice cloths and latest gadgets, I normally don't let those kinda stuffs bother me but I felt terrible that night.

I sat at a corner observing things till my friend's girlfriend came and yanked me off my seat to take pictures with some of her friends. A friend of hers used an iPhone with three cameras at the back to take the pictures, didn't know the model since both 12 and 13 looks similar.

I went and sat back at my corner till the photo guy came and offered to transfer some of the pictures to me... I hesitated because I knew I didn't want to see the pictures but the guy was persuasive so I gave in. If only I knew the embarrassment that was lying in wait for me.

We proceeded to connect to xender, that was when my antiquated camon CX air that I've been using since 2017 decided to show himself. My phone kept rebooting on its own endlessly till the guy got fed up and left. I was super embarrassed.

My friend still came today to transfer the same pictures to me but I objected vehemently because I looked miserable in all the pictures.
I codedly observed guys in my compound dressed up for church and Sunday outings and came to the conclusion that sapa has been my best friend for a really long while.

HAPPY SUNDAY




My friend take heart...it's not that bad. It doesn't take too much to change your wardrobe, it only takes loving and putting more value on yourself.

1 Like

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Supreme145(m): 11:09am On Aug 08, 2022
Samskid310:
Wo no time for long talk
Send aza
Na person dey help pesin
0214980892gtb S.O
Thanks
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by alizma: 11:10am On Aug 08, 2022
Supreme145:
A close friend of mine invited me to a birthday party he threw for his girlfriend a couple of days ago. I initially declined the invitation but reluctantly agreed when the girl called me personally and pleaded with me to show up.

When it was time to get ready for the party, a peep into my wardrobe reminded me that I had no outing cloths. I hadn't gotten a new cloth for over 4 years. My sapa induced introverted nature somehow masked my need for new stuffs because I hardly go out. A sad reality hit me hard in the face... My two jeans and three tee shirts were badly worn out, no shoes either.

I shaa dressed up and left for the party. I immediately regretted my decision of honouring that invitation immediately I stepped into the venue. I looked so out of place... Guys were all dressed up in nice cloths and latest gadgets, I normally don't let those kinda stuffs bother me but I felt terrible that night.

I sat at a corner observing things till my friend's girlfriend came and yanked me off my seat to take pictures with some of her friends. A friend of hers used an iPhone with three cameras at the back to take the pictures, didn't know the model since both 12 and 13 looks similar.

I went and sat back at my corner till the photo guy came and offered to transfer some of the pictures to me... I hesitated because I knew I didn't want to see the pictures but the guy was persuasive so I gave in. If only I knew the embarrassment that was lying in wait for me.

We proceeded to connect to xender, that was when my antiquated camon CX air that I've been using since 2017 decided to show himself. My phone kept rebooting on its own endlessly till the guy got fed up and left. I was super embarrassed.

My friend still came today to transfer the same pictures to me but I objected vehemently because I looked miserable in all the pictures.
I codedly observed guys in my compound dressed up for church and Sunday outings and came to the conclusion that sapa has been my best friend for a really long while.

HAPPY SUNDAY



One day you will look back and smile in praise to God for how much he would have turned your life around. Be focus, be hard working, believe in yourself and be prayerful because is only God that can direct your steps to the right places.
This is not just a motivational speech, I was once in such situation but thank God for the journey so far. As for your friends(the guy and the girl), they are example of best friends, believe me, they know and see how you look but they still want you besides them for total happiness for the day, they see you beyond your physical appearance.

5 Likes

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by peacettw: 11:11am On Aug 08, 2022
IgiveLadiesBj:

What was the changes you made if you don't mind? And how did it turn out?

I will be honest. I am still very much introverted and don't go out much. But when I do go out, I don't stick out as a sore thumb, since I now have a good number of decent outfits and look good most times.

So, the drastic change is that I don't look like a reject anymore. I also don't reject invitations as much as I did back in the day. These changes may seem small to an extrovert but to me, they are huge leaps.

2 Likes

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Emeka71(m): 11:12am On Aug 08, 2022
But at all at all you get food at the party.

1 Like

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by princewarri1985: 11:12am On Aug 08, 2022
Nice write up! You should be a write. Bro in life self confidence matters alot. I could be in your place at the partly and dont give a Bleep about the phone i'm using or the cloth i'm wearing and still have the fun of my life because it all boils down to self confidence.
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by pagorino(m): 11:12am On Aug 08, 2022
The reason you should never give up. Brace up and keep your heads high, bro. Your tomorrow shall be far better than yesterday and today.
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Akharmony: 11:16am On Aug 08, 2022
Follow your instint next time. . There's no crime in refusing to go sometime...
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by letitrainnow(m): 11:17am On Aug 08, 2022
You will shine, bro.
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by mastermaestro(m): 11:26am On Aug 08, 2022
AndroidAI:
When I pull up with my car, i dont care if i'm wearing a pyjamas, i will always steal the show. Men wey get doings grin

Just like my cousin who rides in a bad bad machine BMW. Dude can show up wearing small shorts and flip flops. But you must give am him honour when you behold him machine. grin Money good jor. grin

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Yuyu0328(f): 11:32am On Aug 08, 2022
OP it's good you went for the party because it has brought you back to reality...
When I traveled out of where I reside in one secluded place in kogi state, I felt like the whole world has moved on without me.
Chin up op the best is yet to come

1 Like

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by BinamRex: 11:33am On Aug 08, 2022
MrBrownJay1:


i am not here to have empathy, i am here to give you my HONEST OPINION..you can take it or you can take it. choice is yours as it wont change my opinion on the issue.



it doesnt matter whether someone doubt themselves or not in life....when your whole focus in life is what others possess, then you will never truly be free. why would anyone give a flying fukc what other people have? live your life to the best of your abilities and be done with the misery. how can you ever be happy in life when you focus on people having more than you?!?!



i cant encourage anyone that is focussing on other people....but what i can do is make them understand what is wrong with their stand on life. the minute they stop focussing on other people and their possessions, thats when they will live a better life.
thats MY opinion, and again, you can take it or you can take it.


I can tell sapa hasn't waylaid you before. Be kind with your words. Don't mistake undue, belittling and damaging criticism for constructive criticism.

5 Likes

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Hakeem3(m): 11:37am On Aug 08, 2022
I will only say one thing to you.
Let It be your motivation.

2 Likes

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by meedoLock(m): 11:43am On Aug 08, 2022
The fact is that, a while lot of peoole, even on this forum are relatively going through what OP just posted, but not all can voice it out.

Nature is very sensitive when it comes to having the required needs and having what it takes to be a happy person. Infact, I can relate with op but mine is not monumental, everyone will get to say one or two insufficiency in the lives.

Whenever I'm running through such, data is life and my phone is always my friend, staying online and sensitizing yourself, reading jokes, solving riddles can reduce you the stress of depression and having a feeling of low self-esteem.

No matter the condition you find yourself, remember countless of people are still wishing to be exactly where you are. Law of nature....

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Lovelydaisies: 11:46am On Aug 08, 2022
Just try to get yourself nice things if you can. Improve on your income and improve on your self esteem. Put your situation into the hands of God. Things are going to look up.

2 Likes

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by cayorday89(m): 11:48am On Aug 08, 2022
squash47:
I can relate. It's not only SAPA that does these things to people Sha, sometimes it's a product of high isolation.
Most times, we need to move out and mix up with people....
Very true, I can relate, although Sapa get his own side, I can count the number of times I have put on some clothes I have since 5,7,8 and 10 years ago, especially the ones that I bought with several other people for my grandma's burial in 2013, mine are still very much okay while that of others have no trace again, I have shoes I have worn less than five times that h4e total hours is not even up to 10hrs. After work, I remain indoor all day. Only my jeans gets weak and changed as at when due.

1 Like

Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by Arielle: 12:01pm On Aug 08, 2022
Supreme145:
A close friend of mine invited me to a birthday party he threw for his girlfriend a couple of days ago. I initially declined the invitation but reluctantly agreed when the girl called me personally and pleaded with me to show up.

When it was time to get ready for the party, a peep into my wardrobe reminded me that I had no outing cloths. I hadn't gotten a new cloth for over 4 years. My sapa induced introverted nature somehow masked my need for new stuffs because I hardly go out. A sad reality hit me hard in the face... My two jeans and three tee shirts were badly worn out, no shoes either.

I shaa dressed up and left for the party. I immediately regretted my decision of honouring that invitation immediately I stepped into the venue. I looked so out of place... Guys were all dressed up in nice cloths and latest gadgets, I normally don't let those kinda stuffs bother me but I felt terrible that night.

I sat at a corner observing things till my friend's girlfriend came and yanked me off my seat to take pictures with some of her friends. A friend of hers used an iPhone with three cameras at the back to take the pictures, didn't know the model since both 12 and 13 looks similar.

I went and sat back at my corner till the photo guy came and offered to transfer some of the pictures to me... I hesitated because I knew I didn't want to see the pictures but the guy was persuasive so I gave in. If only I knew the embarrassment that was lying in wait for me.

We proceeded to connect to xender, that was when my antiquated camon CX air that I've been using since 2017 decided to show himself. My phone kept rebooting on its own endlessly till the guy got fed up and left. I was super embarrassed.

My friend still came today to transfer the same pictures to me but I objected vehemently because I looked miserable in all the pictures.
I codedly observed guys in my compound dressed up for church and Sunday outings and came to the conclusion that sapa has been my best friend for a really long while.

HAPPY SUNDAY



I felt like crying when I read this. Here's a hug for you.
Have a plan or a goal for your future no matter if you think it is unrealistic now. Then take baby steps towards that. It always gives you hope that one day things will be better. And gives you something to look forward to. Also take comfort in the fact that you are real and true to yourself. Some people you may feel inferior to oftentimes beg, borrow and steal to give a semblance of owning things they cannot afford. Thank your mama for raising you right. Best of luck to you.
Re: My Ugly Experience At A Friend's Party by ETIIKO: 12:02pm On Aug 08, 2022
Never give up. Nature is training you after this your thinking will change good opportunities ahead

1 Like

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