₦airaland Forum

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

Alright So I'm the only male born of my parent among 4 girls, i also happen to be the last born at it. my problem started when growing up, cause my parent aged bfr getting a Male child which was my Dad and his parent cravings, I was pampered when growing up such that my parents would never watch me do stressful things, dictate when I go out and who I moved out with (My mum's own was even worse cause when growing up, if I want to go out, she'll always send me back inside) even during secondary school they had to get a school very close to our house. my sisters were only the ones that would go to mum's shop and make sales while mum would either stay with me at home or if I eventually go the shop sef I'll always sit and just watch. Literally, I'll say I was denied the right to be exposed to lotta things and real issues about life.

And cause I was not the sociable type cause I'll literally stay at home, watch movies, eat and my movements limited, I was exposed to pornography and masturbation at a very young age and I battled that bad habit thr my University days (Did I say my Parents also dictated the University I went to cause it was close to our House to and any small riot in school then the next hour they'll come and pick me back home till every thing dies down)

So guys over time, I've grown to be this boring guy who is shy, timid, suffering from low self esteem and can't give vibe even when gisting with my fellow guys, in which most of them just relegate me to this small boy level. Did I also say I've never had a Girlfriend all my life cause the truth is ion always know what to say or how to maintain talking vibe. At first I decide not to care and just always console myself with I was created like that and just continue my boring life, it has now gotten to the point I'm not rated in anything at all, most people just make friends with me cause of what they can gain from me, I'm not even good in anything, I can't speak clearly, I'm kinda literally mentally dumb and ion see me useful for anyone or anything, perhaps maybe God only, No business sense, no work skill or experience, no trade experiences to

I'm currently a Corp member serving and before then I rebelled against my parent cause they wanted to dictate the state I serve which is our state of residence so I go to my ppa from home but I told them No and even got to a fight to my Dad cause of this issue and we din speak for like 2weeks, he eventually called me and we settled. But the issue now is guys I've got less than two months left for my POP for service and you don't expect me to return home useless to my parent house again?? Tho sincerely thr my service year, I din touch my allowee so I've saved up to 270k so far. the issue is ask me what I want to do with the money? I've got no idea, what business sense or idea? Nothing is coming to my head, infact I don't know. The funny thing is, my roommate is exactly my opposite, very outspoken, bold, full of vibe and bring back different female friends each day, this guy is not really financially buoyant but you see girls cook and travel all the way to give him for us to eat. I just wish I was like him, i wish i had the vibe

I'm 24years now and at this age, no idea bout my future, bout life, I can't even relate with people, I'm just so sad, depressed and frustrated. At the moment the only job coming to my head is the military cause I served in a military barrack cause I choose it myself but most of the junior officers are trashing my interest by telling me not to waste my time say I no go survive am with my nature, that military needs tough people and endurance bla bla and on the other hand, my mum is saying Never she'll never allow me join the military not over her dead body and she's bout recruiting my Dad to and Sincerely I'm frustrated and my depression have taken another turn that over the past weeks I've been thinking suicide and it's getting really high, I say I should type this here bfr the worse happen cause if I can't be useful for myself what really is the point living??

Please this advice is to parent and intending parent/couples, pls and pls expose ur children to life, don't over pamper your kids, work on them to make them sociable and outspoken, I swear you'll be doing them a great favour. For me I thought my parent loved me, I thought they were trying to protect me but they've put me in a deep mess I have to face alone and just I pray I get the opportunity to make things right with me

I Can only imagine how much pain you are going through.I want you to know that every change you desire to see in your life can only start from your within..

Feed your mind with positive thoughts...
Read good books that will inspire you and help to increase your self worth.I will recommend Mary Crowley You can too,Think big by Ben Carson,John Maxwell's and a host of others...Try and get these books in hard copy if you can so you can easily peruse over them whenever you feel low.You will just be fine...

In addition to all these listen to soul uplifting songs all the time,before you go to sleep and when you wake up...Watch rib-cracking movies like three idiots(thank me later)...Listen to good radio and TV programmes...Join good facebook and WhatsApp group...

Pick up an interest say football since you are a guy follow it keenly and use it as a point of discussion to mingle with other guys...
Lastly Positively declare good things to yourself...You will be fine.
Sending you love and light...

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

Very wrong to blame your parents for everything that is not going your way in life.
Your are not different from many people around, I mean to say that many people are just like you. You just choose to pick interest in people who are exactly your opposite and wish to be like them.
Many guys above 24 have never asked a girl on a date.
Many guys are introverts just like you are.
Many graduates have no business ideas.
Stop blaming your parents and decide what you want to do with your life!

Ayslambc:
Over pampering sometimes causes problems
Nairalanders, am begging for 3k to feed my wife & two kids. Since i lost my job, its been hell. Pls help us before my kids die of starvation.
0200565164 GTB Emmanuel oyedele
God bless u all

Kindly DM me ur WhatsApp number

detectivejones:
I think its cruel for you to totally blame your parents for what happened and not share in the blame. For starters you were not home schooled. You went to public or private school which would have given you the opportunity to interact and build your social life. About learning a skill, job experience and other things that is why you have an android phone its everything at your disposal you can learn, read and watch things online that'd help you revamp your life. About the self esteem do well by speaking words of confidence to yourself. You can still get it right because you're young. And do not cut your parents off they deserve better. My 2kobo.

Imagine! He's a typical introvert but he just found a perfect culprits to put the blame on. I don't know how he's worse than half of the men out there!

You are probably on the autism spectrum or have asperger's syndrome disorder

Are u kidding me bro am 32 but I go no education no business no work just living until the day I die....

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

Alright So I'm the only male born of my parent among 4 girls, i also happen to be the last born at it. my problem started when growing up, cause my parent aged bfr getting a Male child which was my Dad and his parent cravings, I was pampered when growing up such that my parents would never watch me do stressful things, dictate when I go out and who I moved out with (My mum's own was even worse cause when growing up, if I want to go out, she'll always send me back inside) even during secondary school they had to get a school very close to our house. my sisters were only the ones that would go to mum's shop and make sales while mum would either stay with me at home or if I eventually go the shop sef I'll always sit and just watch. Literally, I'll say I was denied the right to be exposed to lotta things and real issues about life.

And cause I was not the sociable type cause I'll literally stay at home, watch movies, eat and my movements limited, I was exposed to pornography and masturbation at a very young age and I battled that bad habit thr my University days (Did I say my Parents also dictated the University I went to cause it was close to our House to and any small riot in school then the next hour they'll come and pick me back home till every thing dies down)

So guys over time, I've grown to be this boring guy who is shy, timid, suffering from low self esteem and can't give vibe even when gisting with my fellow guys, in which most of them just relegate me to this small boy level. Did I also say I've never had a Girlfriend all my life cause the truth is ion always know what to say or how to maintain talking vibe. At first I decide not to care and just always console myself with I was created like that and just continue my boring life, it has now gotten to the point I'm not rated in anything at all, most people just make friends with me cause of what they can gain from me, I'm not even good in anything, I can't speak clearly, I'm kinda literally mentally dumb and ion see me useful for anyone or anything, perhaps maybe God only, No business sense, no work skill or experience, no trade experiences to

I'm currently a Corp member serving and before then I rebelled against my parent cause they wanted to dictate the state I serve which is our state of residence so I go to my ppa from home but I told them No and even got to a fight to my Dad cause of this issue and we din speak for like 2weeks, he eventually called me and we settled. But the issue now is guys I've got less than two months left for my POP for service and you don't expect me to return home useless to my parent house again?? Tho sincerely thr my service year, I din touch my allowee so I've saved up to 270k so far. the issue is ask me what I want to do with the money? I've got no idea, what business sense or idea? Nothing is coming to my head, infact I don't know. The funny thing is, my roommate is exactly my opposite, very outspoken, bold, full of vibe and bring back different female friends each day, this guy is not really financially buoyant but you see girls cook and travel all the way to give him for us to eat. I just wish I was like him, i wish i had the vibe

I'm 24years now and at this age, no idea bout my future, bout life, I can't even relate with people, I'm just so sad, depressed and frustrated. At the moment the only job coming to my head is the military cause I served in a military barrack cause I choose it myself but most of the junior officers are trashing my interest by telling me not to waste my time say I no go survive am with my nature, that military needs tough people and endurance bla bla and on the other hand, my mum is saying Never she'll never allow me join the military not over her dead body and she's bout recruiting my Dad to and Sincerely I'm frustrated and my depression have taken another turn that over the past weeks I've been thinking suicide and it's getting really high, I say I should type this here bfr the worse happen cause if I can't be useful for myself what really is the point living??

Please this advice is to parent and intending parent/couples, pls and pls expose ur children to life, don't over pamper your kids, work on them to make them sociable and outspoken, I swear you'll be doing them a great favour. For me I thought my parent loved me, I thought they were trying to protect me but they've put me in a deep mess I have to face alone and just I pray I get the opportunity to make things right with me

I was a mess at 24 and wasn't sure I'd make it to 30 but I did last month. Don't beat yourself up about anything, you'll figure it out with time. Important thing is you saved so you can make moves with what you have.

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

Alright So I'm the only male born of my parent among 4 girls, i also happen to be the last born at it. my problem started when growing up, cause my parent aged bfr getting a Male child which was my Dad and his parent cravings, I was pampered when growing up such that my parents would never watch me do stressful things, dictate when I go out and who I moved out with (My mum's own was even worse cause when growing up, if I want to go out, she'll always send me back inside) even during secondary school they had to get a school very close to our house. my sisters were only the ones that would go to mum's shop and make sales while mum would either stay with me at home or if I eventually go the shop sef I'll always sit and just watch. Literally, I'll say I was denied the right to be exposed to lotta things and real issues about life.

And cause I was not the sociable type cause I'll literally stay at home, watch movies, eat and my movements limited, I was exposed to pornography and masturbation at a very young age and I battled that bad habit thr my University days (Did I say my Parents also dictated the University I went to cause it was close to our House to and any small riot in school then the next hour they'll come and pick me back home till every thing dies down)

So guys over time, I've grown to be this boring guy who is shy, timid, suffering from low self esteem and can't give vibe even when gisting with my fellow guys, in which most of them just relegate me to this small boy level. Did I also say I've never had a Girlfriend all my life cause the truth is ion always know what to say or how to maintain talking vibe. At first I decide not to care and just always console myself with I was created like that and just continue my boring life, it has now gotten to the point I'm not rated in anything at all, most people just make friends with me cause of what they can gain from me, I'm not even good in anything, I can't speak clearly, I'm kinda literally mentally dumb and ion see me useful for anyone or anything, perhaps maybe God only, No business sense, no work skill or experience, no trade experiences to

I'm currently a Corp member serving and before then I rebelled against my parent cause they wanted to dictate the state I serve which is our state of residence so I go to my ppa from home but I told them No and even got to a fight to my Dad cause of this issue and we din speak for like 2weeks, he eventually called me and we settled. But the issue now is guys I've got less than two months left for my POP for service and you don't expect me to return home useless to my parent house again?? Tho sincerely thr my service year, I din touch my allowee so I've saved up to 270k so far. the issue is ask me what I want to do with the money? I've got no idea, what business sense or idea? Nothing is coming to my head, infact I don't know. The funny thing is, my roommate is exactly my opposite, very outspoken, bold, full of vibe and bring back different female friends each day, this guy is not really financially buoyant but you see girls cook and travel all the way to give him for us to eat. I just wish I was like him, i wish i had the vibe

I'm 24years now and at this age, no idea bout my future, bout life, I can't even relate with people, I'm just so sad, depressed and frustrated. At the moment the only job coming to my head is the military cause I served in a military barrack cause I choose it myself but most of the junior officers are trashing my interest by telling me not to waste my time say I no go survive am with my nature, that military needs tough people and endurance bla bla and on the other hand, my mum is saying Never she'll never allow me join the military not over her dead body and she's bout recruiting my Dad to and Sincerely I'm frustrated and my depression have taken another turn that over the past weeks I've been thinking suicide and it's getting really high, I say I should type this here bfr the worse happen cause if I can't be useful for myself what really is the point living??

Please this advice is to parent and intending parent/couples, pls and pls expose ur children to life, don't over pamper your kids, work on them to make them sociable and outspoken, I swear you'll be doing them a great favour. For me I thought my parent loved me, I thought they were trying to protect me but they've put me in a deep mess I have to face alone and just I pray I get the opportunity to make things right with me

OP I know that if I tell you that you just described the way I was brought up, you won't believe it.In fact I think I need to make my own thread about it.
OP your own is still better, to God who made me.Sebi your parents still get money small, my own parents are not even well to do.Am 22 years as at now and there was a time I almost committed sucide.Right now,am I don't stay with my parents anymore because I ran away from home.Now am doing better without them.

I really thought my own case was worst.

My Dad did the same thing to me and my other siblings. always overprotective in the name of love. he won't let me hang with friends, making shy and depressed at some point. The worst is that we no even get money. I really need advice on my own.

Ways I've been able to deal with my own thus far is that I've always tried to be in Social places all the time, mostly Church. I am learning a musical instrument too.
Secondly, you're not as dumb as you think. You're very intelligent and brave within you.

Sad. Op if you can see this, send me a private message.

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

Alright So I'm the only male born of my parent among 4 girls, i also happen to be the last born at it. my problem started when growing up, cause my parent aged bfr getting a Male child which was my Dad and his parent cravings, I was pampered when growing up such that my parents would never watch me do stressful things, dictate when I go out and who I moved out with (My mum's own was even worse cause when growing up, if I want to go out, she'll always send me back inside) even during secondary school they had to get a school very close to our house. my sisters were only the ones that would go to mum's shop and make sales while mum would either stay with me at home or if I eventually go the shop sef I'll always sit and just watch. Literally, I'll say I was denied the right to be exposed to lotta things and real issues about life.

And cause I was not the sociable type cause I'll literally stay at home, watch movies, eat and my movements limited, I was exposed to pornography and masturbation at a very young age and I battled that bad habit thr my University days (Did I say my Parents also dictated the University I went to cause it was close to our House to and any small riot in school then the next hour they'll come and pick me back home till every thing dies down)

So guys over time, I've grown to be this boring guy who is shy, timid, suffering from low self esteem and can't give vibe even when gisting with my fellow guys, in which most of them just relegate me to this small boy level. Did I also say I've never had a Girlfriend all my life cause the truth is ion always know what to say or how to maintain talking vibe. At first I decide not to care and just always console myself with I was created like that and just continue my boring life, it has now gotten to the point I'm not rated in anything at all, most people just make friends with me cause of what they can gain from me, I'm not even good in anything, I can't speak clearly, I'm kinda literally mentally dumb and ion see me useful for anyone or anything, perhaps maybe God only, No business sense, no work skill or experience, no trade experiences to

I'm currently a Corp member serving and before then I rebelled against my parent cause they wanted to dictate the state I serve which is our state of residence so I go to my ppa from home but I told them No and even got to a fight to my Dad cause of this issue and we din speak for like 2weeks, he eventually called me and we settled. But the issue now is guys I've got less than two months left for my POP for service and you don't expect me to return home useless to my parent house again?? Tho sincerely thr my service year, I din touch my allowee so I've saved up to 270k so far. the issue is ask me what I want to do with the money? I've got no idea, what business sense or idea? Nothing is coming to my head, infact I don't know. The funny thing is, my roommate is exactly my opposite, very outspoken, bold, full of vibe and bring back different female friends each day, this guy is not really financially buoyant but you see girls cook and travel all the way to give him for us to eat. I just wish I was like him, i wish i had the vibe

I'm 24years now and at this age, no idea bout my future, bout life, I can't even relate with people, I'm just so sad, depressed and frustrated. At the moment the only job coming to my head is the military cause I served in a military barrack cause I choose it myself but most of the junior officers are trashing my interest by telling me not to waste my time say I no go survive am with my nature, that military needs tough people and endurance bla bla and on the other hand, my mum is saying Never she'll never allow me join the military not over her dead body and she's bout recruiting my Dad to and Sincerely I'm frustrated and my depression have taken another turn that over the past weeks I've been thinking suicide and it's getting really high, I say I should type this here bfr the worse happen cause if I can't be useful for myself what really is the point living??

Please this advice is to parent and intending parent/couples, pls and pls expose ur children to life, don't over pamper your kids, work on them to make them sociable and outspoken, I swear you'll be doing them a great favour. For me I thought my parent loved me, I thought they were trying to protect me but they've put me in a deep mess I have to face alone and just I pray I get the opportunity to make things right with me

You will overcome since you know what to do.

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

Alright So I'm the only male born of my parent among 4 girls, i also happen to be the last born at it. my problem started when growing up, cause my parent aged bfr getting a Male child which was my Dad and his parent cravings, I was pampered when growing up such that my parents would never watch me do stressful things, dictate when I go out and who I moved out with (My mum's own was even worse cause when growing up, if I want to go out, she'll always send me back inside) even during secondary school they had to get a school very close to our house. my sisters were only the ones that would go to mum's shop and make sales while mum would either stay with me at home or if I eventually go the shop sef I'll always sit and just watch. Literally, I'll say I was denied the right to be exposed to lotta things and real issues about life.

And cause I was not the sociable type cause I'll literally stay at home, watch movies, eat and my movements limited, I was exposed to pornography and masturbation at a very young age and I battled that bad habit thr my University days (Did I say my Parents also dictated the University I went to cause it was close to our House to and any small riot in school then the next hour they'll come and pick me back home till every thing dies down)

So guys over time, I've grown to be this boring guy who is shy, timid, suffering from low self esteem and can't give vibe even when gisting with my fellow guys, in which most of them just relegate me to this small boy level. Did I also say I've never had a Girlfriend all my life cause the truth is ion always know what to say or how to maintain talking vibe. At first I decide not to care and just always console myself with I was created like that and just continue my boring life, it has now gotten to the point I'm not rated in anything at all, most people just make friends with me cause of what they can gain from me, I'm not even good in anything, I can't speak clearly, I'm kinda literally mentally dumb and ion see me useful for anyone or anything, perhaps maybe God only, No business sense, no work skill or experience, no trade experiences to

I'm currently a Corp member serving and before then I rebelled against my parent cause they wanted to dictate the state I serve which is our state of residence so I go to my ppa from home but I told them No and even got to a fight to my Dad cause of this issue and we din speak for like 2weeks, he eventually called me and we settled. But the issue now is guys I've got less than two months left for my POP for service and you don't expect me to return home useless to my parent house again?? Tho sincerely thr my service year, I din touch my allowee so I've saved up to 270k so far. the issue is ask me what I want to do with the money? I've got no idea, what business sense or idea? Nothing is coming to my head, infact I don't know. The funny thing is, my roommate is exactly my opposite, very outspoken, bold, full of vibe and bring back different female friends each day, this guy is not really financially buoyant but you see girls cook and travel all the way to give him for us to eat. I just wish I was like him, i wish i had the vibe

I'm 24years now and at this age, no idea bout my future, bout life, I can't even relate with people, I'm just so sad, depressed and frustrated. At the moment the only job coming to my head is the military cause I served in a military barrack cause I choose it myself but most of the junior officers are trashing my interest by telling me not to waste my time say I no go survive am with my nature, that military needs tough people and endurance bla bla and on the other hand, my mum is saying Never she'll never allow me join the military not over her dead body and she's bout recruiting my Dad to and Sincerely I'm frustrated and my depression have taken another turn that over the past weeks I've been thinking suicide and it's getting really high, I say I should type this here bfr the worse happen cause if I can't be useful for myself what really is the point living??

Please this advice is to parent and intending parent/couples, pls and pls expose ur children to life, don't over pamper your kids, work on them to make them sociable and outspoken, I swear you'll be doing them a great favour. For me I thought my parent loved me, I thought they were trying to protect me but they've put me in a deep mess I have to face alone and just I pray I get the opportunity to make things right with me

Damn, so sad. I’ll employ you to see a therapist, you are on the right track for been able to recognize ur issue sef

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

Alright So I'm the only male born of my parent among 4 girls, i also happen to be the last born at it. my problem started when growing up, cause my parent aged bfr getting a Male child which was my Dad and his parent cravings, I was pampered when growing up such that my parents would never watch me do stressful things, dictate when I go out and who I moved out with (My mum's own was even worse cause when growing up, if I want to go out, she'll always send me back inside) even during secondary school they had to get a school very close to our house. my sisters were only the ones that would go to mum's shop and make sales while mum would either stay with me at home or if I eventually go the shop sef I'll always sit and just watch. Literally, I'll say I was denied the right to be exposed to lotta things and real issues about life.

And cause I was not the sociable type cause I'll literally stay at home, watch movies, eat and my movements limited, I was exposed to pornography and masturbation at a very young age and I battled that bad habit thr my University days (Did I say my Parents also dictated the University I went to cause it was close to our House to and any small riot in school then the next hour they'll come and pick me back home till every thing dies down)

So guys over time, I've grown to be this boring guy who is shy, timid, suffering from low self esteem and can't give vibe even when gisting with my fellow guys, in which most of them just relegate me to this small boy level. Did I also say I've never had a Girlfriend all my life cause the truth is ion always know what to say or how to maintain talking vibe. At first I decide not to care and just always console myself with I was created like that and just continue my boring life, it has now gotten to the point I'm not rated in anything at all, most people just make friends with me cause of what they can gain from me, I'm not even good in anything, I can't speak clearly, I'm kinda literally mentally dumb and ion see me useful for anyone or anything, perhaps maybe God only, No business sense, no work skill or experience, no trade experiences to

I'm currently a Corp member serving and before then I rebelled against my parent cause they wanted to dictate the state I serve which is our state of residence so I go to my ppa from home but I told them No and even got to a fight to my Dad cause of this issue and we din speak for like 2weeks, he eventually called me and we settled. But the issue now is guys I've got less than two months left for my POP for service and you don't expect me to return home useless to my parent house again?? Tho sincerely thr my service year, I din touch my allowee so I've saved up to 270k so far. the issue is ask me what I want to do with the money? I've got no idea, what business sense or idea? Nothing is coming to my head, infact I don't know. The funny thing is, my roommate is exactly my opposite, very outspoken, bold, full of vibe and bring back different female friends each day, this guy is not really financially buoyant but you see girls cook and travel all the way to give him for us to eat. I just wish I was like him, i wish i had the vibe

I'm 24years now and at this age, no idea bout my future, bout life, I can't even relate with people, I'm just so sad, depressed and frustrated. At the moment the only job coming to my head is the military cause I served in a military barrack cause I choose it myself but most of the junior officers are trashing my interest by telling me not to waste my time say I no go survive am with my nature, that military needs tough people and endurance bla bla and on the other hand, my mum is saying Never she'll never allow me join the military not over her dead body and she's bout recruiting my Dad to and Sincerely I'm frustrated and my depression have taken another turn that over the past weeks I've been thinking suicide and it's getting really high, I say I should type this here bfr the worse happen cause if I can't be useful for myself what really is the point living??

Please this advice is to parent and intending parent/couples, pls and pls expose ur children to life, don't over pamper your kids, work on them to make them sociable and outspoken, I swear you'll be doing them a great favour. For me I thought my parent loved me, I thought they were trying to protect me but they've put me in a deep mess I have to face alone and just I pray I get the opportunity to make things right with me

Guy, go out and try chatting people up, gradually you'll get out of this. Attend social events - church, weddings and all, try making new friends. Sometimes you can also go to bars and club with good friends and take small alcohol. In no time you'll be fine. Don't worry.

Wow!
Ablemed, I'm also the only male child with elder sisters. Were the same age infact, And our stories aren't different, The only divergence is that my parents didn't pamper me. They made sure I did chores, sent me on errands, put me in charge of things, they policed where I went to and who I went with, dictated all my schools forced me to attend church, hammered rules into my head and basically regimented me.

So basically were the same but with different parenting styles.

You won't believe that I still had self esteem issues, I couldn't talk to women for most parts, I became introverted, hardly went out, lacked Confidence and communication skills, shy and quiet. Had body image issues, speech issues too, only comfortable around people I know, Just like you!

But if you see me today! You'd be shocked. Your parents shielded you bro, But you're on a right path. This is how you begin to come out of your shell. This is how you begin to move forward. Stop blaming them, you've the next 6 years of your life to break their grooming and become the person you want to be. But having 2 parents looking out for you bro is a blessing, accept it embrace it while shedding their influence small small. Nothing happens overnight. You can't undo everything in a week it takes time but it's one step.

Despite the fact that my parents Didn't "pamper" me I still didn't turn out better.

You need to retrain yourself, get a skill, learn something. Instead of moving out now use that money to learn something that would take you out of the house daily, Interact with people, even if it is 1 person everyday. Start leaving your comfort zone, go and start conversations with strangers. Smile!

They don't install confidence like an app. You build it bit by bit. Apologize to your parents because you still need that support structure if you really want to stand strong.

You're privileged and it's a good thing. Start using it to benefit yourself. If at age 30 you're still blaming mummy & daddy then it means you're an idiot.

The things your friends are doing that you aren't you'll end up doing them if you start working on yourself now, they had the opportunity to have a different upbringing that doesn't mean they're better than you. It's people like you (us) that end up doing that most because we didn't start earlier. Learn from them but don't copy them.

In the past 2 years my confidence has increased, I'm not so introverted anymore, I go out everyday to work and communicate with people, I went on a date last week, I'm meeting strangers and we're talking, and vibing, I can go out and come in.

Masturbating & porn has a negative way of influencing how you look at women and men, it also gives you that false perception on how you should build relationships with people. So bro you need to stop that. That one too is in your hands and is totally up to you. I did myself #selftraining #selfimprovement.

Your parents gave you the best parenting, now it's time to shed the parts you don't like.

Take it from someone who understands this thing.

@ OP you need someone to help you in doing total overhauling of the wrong ideas that's have been inculcated in you while you are growing up. I have message you, I need your response to the message so we can know the next step to take.

Eileene:
I Can only imagine how much pain you are going through.I want you to know that every change you desire to see in your life can only start from your within..

Feed your mind with positive thoughts...
Read good books that will inspire you and help to increase your self worth.I will recommend Mary Crowley You can too,Think big by Ben Carson,John Maxwell's and a host of others...Try and get these books in hard copy if you can so you can easily peruse over them whenever you feel low.You will just be fine...

In addition to all these listen to soul uplifting songs all the time,before you go to sleep and when you wake up...Watch rib-cracking movies like three idiots(thank me later)...Listen to good radio and TV programmes...Join good facebook and WhatsApp group...

Pick up an interest say football since you are a guy follow it keenly and use it as a point of discussion to mingle with other guys...
Lastly Positively declare good things to yourself...You will be fine.
Sending you love and light...

Thanks so much bro. much Blessings

@ OP.
i am much older than you are: i am not perfect, so please take this little advice i have for you, meditate on it and make things work for yourself.

Firstly, forgive your parents, they are not perfect just as you are not perfect; you will get to understand this with time. Now it is time to take the bull by the horns and be responsible for yourself and this can be achieved without you leaving their presence. You still need all the help and opportunity you can gain from them so do not allow pride and bitterness make you suffer; it does not make sense. You just have to disagree with them on some issues with respect and maturity and thy will get used to that over time.

Secondly and pls take this particular advice seriously: control that habit of masturbation to the minimum. Force yourself to .
go for one month without masturbation for a start and you will see changes that will come naturally.

Productive people try as much as possible to go for 100 days of no sex and masturbation every year. just 100 days.

Nature is always trying to hook you up with people and the opposite sex, but when you masturbate you naturally loose the drive to socialize, this is also natural.

Stop masturbation today and life will just arrange itself much to your supprice. people will approach you, the opposite sex will approach you, situations will happen to you in your Favour and from here the ball will be in your court to manage all of that.

Masturbation takes away from you what nature gives to you naturally through your actions. a thousand therapy sessions will do nothing if you do not control this act of too much sex and masturbation.

WatermelonSugar:
Hi Ablemed,

I can partly relate to how you feel because I am the only daughter and I faced similar restrictions, even though I oppose them with a bit of coconut headism.

Like someone said easier, you're aware of your problem and that's a great step to finding your solution.

I will recommend three things:
1) Joining the right communities. In your quest to meet people, you may end up meeting terrible people who may try to solve your problem in the wrong way. I highly recommend Twenties Tribe (check them on Instagram). If you're a Christian, you can join a local youth-centric church assembly so you can expose yourself to other youths and improve your social skills.

2) Read books on people interaction, communication, and networking, and intentionally try to practice everything you wil learn there. You can watch videos or listen to podcasts if it works better for you. You can practice them by attending networking events and other cool events.

3) If you're a Christian, I'll advise you back up these works with prayer. God sees what's going on, He will help you on this journey.

PS : HAVING A GIRLFRIEND WILL NOT FIX THIS PROBLEM!!

What you need to learn is to build good platonic and professional relationship, not a romantic relationship. Don't let anyone deceive you.
Besides, it's not a crime if you have never been in a relationship at 24, you still have years ahead of you.

Also, you can decide to learn one or two Digital/tech skills that you resonate with.

Love and e-hug.

I'm indeed very grateful... God bless you

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

Alright So I'm the only male born of my parent among 4 girls, i also happen to be the last born at it. my problem started when growing up, cause my parent aged bfr getting a Male child which was my Dad and his parent cravings, I was pampered when growing up such that my parents would never watch me do stressful things, dictate when I go out and who I moved out with (My mum's own was even worse cause when growing up, if I want to go out, she'll always send me back inside) even during secondary school they had to get a school very close to our house. my sisters were only the ones that would go to mum's shop and make sales while mum would either stay with me at home or if I eventually go the shop sef I'll always sit and just watch. Literally, I'll say I was denied the right to be exposed to lotta things and real issues about life.

And cause I was not the sociable type cause I'll literally stay at home, watch movies, eat and my movements limited, I was exposed to pornography and masturbation at a very young age and I battled that bad habit thr my University days (Did I say my Parents also dictated the University I went to cause it was close to our House to and any small riot in school then the next hour they'll come and pick me back home till every thing dies down)

So guys over time, I've grown to be this boring guy who is shy, timid, suffering from low self esteem and can't give vibe even when gisting with my fellow guys, in which most of them just relegate me to this small boy level. Did I also say I've never had a Girlfriend all my life cause the truth is ion always know what to say or how to maintain talking vibe. At first I decide not to care and just always console myself with I was created like that and just continue my boring life, it has now gotten to the point I'm not rated in anything at all, most people just make friends with me cause of what they can gain from me, I'm not even good in anything, I can't speak clearly, I'm kinda literally mentally dumb and ion see me useful for anyone or anything, perhaps maybe God only, No business sense, no work skill or experience, no trade experiences to

I'm currently a Corp member serving and before then I rebelled against my parent cause they wanted to dictate the state I serve which is our state of residence so I go to my ppa from home but I told them No and even got to a fight to my Dad cause of this issue and we din speak for like 2weeks, he eventually called me and we settled. But the issue now is guys I've got less than two months left for my POP for service and you don't expect me to return home useless to my parent house again?? Tho sincerely thr my service year, I din touch my allowee so I've saved up to 270k so far. the issue is ask me what I want to do with the money? I've got no idea, what business sense or idea? Nothing is coming to my head, infact I don't know. The funny thing is, my roommate is exactly my opposite, very outspoken, bold, full of vibe and bring back different female friends each day, this guy is not really financially buoyant but you see girls cook and travel all the way to give him for us to eat. I just wish I was like him, i wish i had the vibe

I'm 24years now and at this age, no idea bout my future, bout life, I can't even relate with people, I'm just so sad, depressed and frustrated. At the moment the only job coming to my head is the military cause I served in a military barrack cause I choose it myself but most of the junior officers are trashing my interest by telling me not to waste my time say I no go survive am with my nature, that military needs tough people and endurance bla bla and on the other hand, my mum is saying Never she'll never allow me join the military not over her dead body and she's bout recruiting my Dad to and Sincerely I'm frustrated and my depression have taken another turn that over the past weeks I've been thinking suicide and it's getting really high, I say I should type this here bfr the worse happen cause if I can't be useful for myself what really is the point living??

Please this advice is to parent and intending parent/couples, pls and pls expose ur children to life, don't over pamper your kids, work on them to make them sociable and outspoken, I swear you'll be doing them a great favour. For me I thought my parent loved me, I thought they were trying to protect me but they've put me in a deep mess I have to face alone and just I pray I get the opportunity to make things right with me

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you.

Though you there is, to solve your dilemma.

Read books.

This are business books I recommend.

Small Business big money by Akin Alabi
How to sell to Nigerians by Akin alabi
Thou shall prosper by Daniel lapin
Think and grow rich by napoleon hill
How to make friends and influence people by Dale carnegie
The way of the superior man by David deida


For Your women skills, read

Sperm wars
The female brain by louan
The dating mind by geofery miller
Alpha male Bible by Sean Wayne


Read all this books within a month before your passing out. You will find yourself and be free.


Just read.... You are amazing, and unique... There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, you think there is, then read to fix you.

Stay blessed brother

I have seen my type of person, you're even better than me because I can't type all these words you just typed, mine is my nature not from parents

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

Alright So I'm the only male born of my parent among 4 girls, i also happen to be the last born at it. my problem started when growing up, cause my parent aged bfr getting a Male child which was my Dad and his parent cravings, I was pampered when growing up such that my parents would never watch me do stressful things, dictate when I go out and who I moved out with (My mum's own was even worse cause when growing up, if I want to go out, she'll always send me back inside) even during secondary school they had to get a school very close to our house. my sisters were only the ones that would go to mum's shop and make sales while mum would either stay with me at home or if I eventually go the shop sef I'll always sit and just watch. Literally, I'll say I was denied the right to be exposed to lotta things and real issues about life.

And cause I was not the sociable type cause I'll literally stay at home, watch movies, eat and my movements limited, I was exposed to pornography and masturbation at a very young age and I battled that bad habit thr my University days (Did I say my Parents also dictated the University I went to cause it was close to our House to and any small riot in school then the next hour they'll come and pick me back home till every thing dies down)

So guys over time, I've grown to be this boring guy who is shy, timid, suffering from low self esteem and can't give vibe even when gisting with my fellow guys, in which most of them just relegate me to this small boy level. Did I also say I've never had a Girlfriend all my life cause the truth is ion always know what to say or how to maintain talking vibe. At first I decide not to care and just always console myself with I was created like that and just continue my boring life, it has now gotten to the point I'm not rated in anything at all, most people just make friends with me cause of what they can gain from me, I'm not even good in anything, I can't speak clearly, I'm kinda literally mentally dumb and ion see me useful for anyone or anything, perhaps maybe God only, No business sense, no work skill or experience, no trade experiences to

I'm currently a Corp member serving and before then I rebelled against my parent cause they wanted to dictate the state I serve which is our state of residence so I go to my ppa from home but I told them No and even got to a fight to my Dad cause of this issue and we din speak for like 2weeks, he eventually called me and we settled. But the issue now is guys I've got less than two months left for my POP for service and you don't expect me to return home useless to my parent house again?? Tho sincerely thr my service year, I din touch my allowee so I've saved up to 270k so far. the issue is ask me what I want to do with the money? I've got no idea, what business sense or idea? Nothing is coming to my head, infact I don't know. The funny thing is, my roommate is exactly my opposite, very outspoken, bold, full of vibe and bring back different female friends each day, this guy is not really financially buoyant but you see girls cook and travel all the way to give him for us to eat. I just wish I was like him, i wish i had the vibe

I'm 24years now and at this age, no idea bout my future, bout life, I can't even relate with people, I'm just so sad, depressed and frustrated. At the moment the only job coming to my head is the military cause I served in a military barrack cause I choose it myself but most of the junior officers are trashing my interest by telling me not to waste my time say I no go survive am with my nature, that military needs tough people and endurance bla bla and on the other hand, my mum is saying Never she'll never allow me join the military not over her dead body and she's bout recruiting my Dad to and Sincerely I'm frustrated and my depression have taken another turn that over the past weeks I've been thinking suicide and it's getting really high, I say I should type this here bfr the worse happen cause if I can't be useful for myself what really is the point living??

Please this advice is to parent and intending parent/couples, pls and pls expose ur children to life, don't over pamper your kids, work on them to make them sociable and outspoken, I swear you'll be doing them a great favour. For me I thought my parent loved me, I thought they were trying to protect me but they've put me in a deep mess I have to face alone and just I pray I get the opportunity to make things right with me

While it's good to be self aware.

The vast majority of people aren't better than you.
You're still young to pick an area of interest amenable to your field.of study & then read, read, read.

You can do a lot without many friends.

Ablemed:
Thanks so much bro. much Blessings

Bro?? Abeg don't turn me to a guy.
On a serious note try and follow what I said it will really help...

i feel bad for you but what of your sisters
what are they saying
how close are you to them, surely one of them is very close to you

My case is worst, I'm just looking for centipede to eat

Ablemed:
Can therapy work for me?? isn't it to late at 24years of age?? I just finished calling mum now and accused her of everything that has happened to me, I told her I don't want to hear from her, not anytime soon. I've tried calling my Dad to but his line is switch off, I just wanna cut both of them off, They put me in this mess that I have to fight alone now

It's never too late and you have a whole lot of time in your hands, I am telling you this because I can relate, some similarities and differences in both experiences and the outcome. I can even say you are lucky to have finished schooling earlier, now is to focus on yourself and find out what truly interests you and I can bet you that you still need those same parents more than ever before because most people will not relate with your situations and those who will relate won't be able to go all out for you.. Yeah, it's complicated but with your age you can still do a whole lot to help yourself.

why would you do that
see why don't direct your bad situations towards positive thing like becoming a critic of books or movies or product or something
the people that will hurt are the people that are very close to you if you take your life

Dumb! Cutting her off doesn't change the fact that 'what's done, is done'. You should be grateful you have parents that care about your well-being! The best approach would have been to lay your concerns to them and give them reasons why you'd want to be left alone. Call your mum and apologise ASAP. Nobody went to school to study how to become a good mother, let alone how to be one in a misogynistic culture. It's all trial and error.

Move on!

Now that you're aware of your current situation, what are you doing about it? Therapy is for everyone, irrespective of their ages. Read self-help books and practise them. Join some religious groups and get involved with their activities (that's the easiest way to build new relationships). Create new career goals. Imagine how you'd like your future to look and work towards actualising it.

Ablemed:
Can therapy work for me?? isn't it to late at 24years of age?? I just finished calling mum now and accused her of everything that has happened to me, I told her I don't want to hear from her, not anytime soon. I've tried calling my Dad to but his line is switch off, I just wanna cut both of them off, They put me in this mess that I have to fight alone now

I'd highly suggest seeking out a therapist who works with attachment issues. You don't have to be stuck with this.

Also, I suggest you keep processing your emotions, but try not to dwell: let yourself experience all of the stages of grief for the time and opportunities that were not available to you instead of getting stuck with the anger and bitterness.

maasoap:
Imagine! He's a typical introvert but he just found a perfect culprits to put the blame on. I don't know how he's worse than half of the men out there!

I tell you.

Ablemed:
I'll like to make my story short as possible without much introduction tho. And also a lesson parents/ new couples should learn from my ordeal, Pls read to the end.

me [/b]

I don't see what you are blaming your parent for here. These are traints you'll find even in kids that weren't pampered.

Bro, stop the blame game. Your mindset is the problem. Your parents didn't expose you to maturation. You learnt it yourself. Stephen R. and Covey said "Any time you think the cause of your problem is outside there, that thinking is the problem". The starting point is to own up. The masturbation you engage in, is the one that messed up your self image and self confidence. Send me your Whatsapp number. I don't like typing. I will send you a voice note. Thanks.

Ablemed:
Can therapy work for me?? isn't it to late at 24years of age?? I just finished calling mum now and accused her of everything that has happened to me, I told her I don't want to hear from her, not anytime soon. I've tried calling my Dad to but his line is switch off, I just wanna cut both of them off, They put me in this mess that I have to fight alone now