₦airaland Forum

samuelson06:
But I'm not the one having troubles. Or you just want to hear my voice on phone?

Sorry, I later realized I quoted the wrong guy. However, since you are connected to him, you can link him up to me. Thanks.

samuelson06:
I sense conflict: Your story doesn't reflect you. You sound like an intelligent person but tell a story of a foolish person.

You can't sound the way you do, and be messing things up with your life. I don't see any correlation and as such I don't believe your story.

But if at all you think you are right, let the woman go so you can face your life as a single person. She's doing you a favor. Don't use someone's child to console your present circumstances. I can understand how hustlers can pound on a woman like they are the source of their troubles. Let her go so you can save, pay your debts, and improve your life.

Everyone has a right to association and they can choose to leave when they want the moment they find out the relationship isn't serving their interest. Let her go. She has every right to stay or leave.

No tangible means of livelihood, but you got married. Now, the chips are down and you are wailing. Is that how to plan to succeed or you were planning to fail? So, what exactly do you want? Manner from heaven? No!

Look, no man has any right to get married when they're earning below 100k naira. Stop inviting poverty into your life. It's easy to fall in life but hard to rise. Right now, you must accept your situation and stop this self-pity.

Sit down and plan your life. Disregard your age and gain some stamina before looking for another woman because this one is probably leaving and may not return.

I see you like an intelligent chap. Get in touch let's work out something. But I have a feeling you are not sincere. If ever you are, let's talk. I can promise it's going to make sense to you. Every big thing starts small. Don't be afraid to start all over again.

Can I also reach out. I am a female in need of a remote job. I am a virtual assistant

Zaynkad:
Can I also reach out. I am a female in need of a remote job. I am a virtual assistant

Yes

Antihypocrite:
I have been married for 3 years now, I have known my wife for 5 years altogether. She was and is still the best thing that ever happened to me.

I don't know where to start from, I can't come to terms with the fact that my wife is leaving.

Guys, I think the problem started last year after some hoodlums stole my bike. That was my major source of livelihood apart from some home lessons that I used to do, but stopped due to health reasons.

It's been difficult financially and I honestly don't know what else to do.

Shortly after my bike was stolen, I got a loan from lapo and added with my little savings to enter palm oil business. I wish I had not done so as I ended up losing about 80k because the guy I worked with cheated me whole heartedly.

My wife had to get a job as a teacher in a private primary school. I told her it was just temporary as I was working to raise money for her start a poultry.

In order to clear the lapo loan, I had to do odd jobs and take loan from loan apps. My wife's little salary of 20k became the major source of feeding while I battled to clear the loan.

Sometimes I would borrow from friends to pay the loan app to be able to borrow a higher amount from the loan apps again. This was a mistake and a trap cos now I am so much indebted to these loan apps. I am even owing some friends and right now I am unable to pay back.

I have been in debt for over 8 months now to these loan apps. They have tarnished my Image to all my contacts.

I even stopped going to church because most of my church members who received messages from these loan apps did not even care to hear me out. They believed the loan apps that I am a fraudster on the run.

My wife started feeling ashamed of me. She stopped associating with me in public spaces. I know she has tried. Nobody deserves to pass through what she is passing through.

This afternoon when she came back from work, she told me that she would be going back to her parents house

She said that it is best she goes back to her people until I am able to sort my self out.

Guys I have tried to be strong for so long. Right now I don't think I can hold on anymore. I have always believed that things would turn out well, but right now I am in a low place. I don't know how long I can hold on again.

Last month I tried to even get a security job that pays 25k monthly. But I feel so discouraged to do the job. How long will I work to clear a loan of 320k that keeps adding interest daily.

Thoughts of suicide have been crossing my mind today. I really need help

What can I do? I don't even have the energy to pray. Has anyone ever been in my shoes? If yes how did you come out?

Did you just say you don't have the energy to pray? That's why you have been failing.. Now I see where your problems are coming from, you think it's by your own strength..
Mind you that if you commit suicide, you're finished both spiritually and physically. Better run to JESUS CHRIST, He alone can save you from this mess.

I once lost 1million naira to bet9ja, I nearly killed myself but only Jesus Christ saw me through, today everything is now a story and a big lesson to me.

samuelson06:
Yes

Please your email sir

samuelson06:
You're welcome bro. Maybe I hurt you with my words earlier, I wish to say I'm sorry. Usually, I'm that blunt but you can filter off some of the things I said that you may see as offensive and take the good stuff. I hope we can call it even now?

Well, I don't think I've really done much for now. However, if you give yourself to humility, focus, and determination, you'll see yourself. You have what it takes already. What you need now is to indulge yourself mightily. Like I said earlier, every big thing starts small. I know exactly what I'm doing with you. Look beyond today.

Avoid distractions and just focus on building your life. It's easy to become rich.

Did you block me on WhatsApp?

Antihypocrite:
Did you block me on WhatsApp?

No.

samuelson06:
Thanks so much for finding wisdom in my comment even though some have chosen to condemn it.

I may sound arrogant but I love everyone and most times, I talk in a manner that'd make you feel bad at first, and later you realize that what I said was the blunt truth. And I also talk regardless whether we are meeting on- or off-line.

I'm in my middle thirties and still single and it's not as if I wouldn't have loved to be married but considering the background that I'm coming from, I've chosen to wait a little longer so I don't end up reinforcing poverty that I came to see in my family.

I feel if that's the sacrifice I'd have to make for my unborn children, then so be it. I've tasted poverty and I hate it with everything within me. I don't wish my children experience it. But glory be to God because I'm winning the battle.

I don't see any sense when people in my age bracket say they want to get married early so they can still be strong to take care of their children. And I ask, what's wrong in having your first child at 40? Won't that child be 30 when you turn 70? Can't a 30-year-old comfortablly take care of his or herself even if I die at 70? BTW, a 70-year-old can still be very strong if he takes good care of himself, especially if he keeps to his fitness routines.

You'd agree with me that even an 18-year-old can take care of his or herself alone having received the right the right parenting and having everything needed to navigate through life. What's the point of jumping into marriage and ending up giving birth to children you can barely take care of and eventually losing them to the society? You end up suffering for nothing. And the you lose your children to the society, you are automatically a failure. I can go on and on but let me stop here.

The youths just need to sit up because the beginner is not always the finisher.

boss man oil full ya head...nice one...infact I don follow you...hope to communicate with you sometime someday...love to be friends with you.... you be got positive mindset and vibes....tuale baba...

Orgym:
Sorry, I later realized I quoted the wrong guy. However, since you are connected to him, you can link him up to me. Thanks.

Were you looking for me?

Wizywiz:
boss man oil full ya head...nice one...infact I don follow you...hope to communicate with you sometime someday...love to be friends with you.... you be got positive mindset and vibes....tuale baba...

You're welcome bro. I'll be on the platform for a long time. Holla at me when you want.

samuelson06:
You're welcome bro. I'll be on the platform for a long time. Holla at me when you want.

no p bro... thanks...I will mail you...or better still drop your mail address so we can link up from there

samuelson06:
No.

Sir I lost my fone. I retrieved my sim yesterday. I am using some ones fone now.
I will try and type the remaining ones anyway

Antihypocrite:
Sir I lost my fone. I retrieved my sim yesterday. I am using some ones fone now.
I will try and type the remaining ones anyway

Ete, you're full of excuses. Keep some to yourself.

samuelson06:
Ete, you're full of excuses. Keep some to yourself.

Boss, u are my best bet to come out of this predicament. Don't give up on me. Please I have devised a means to get a fone and continue the job. But I will need a favour. Could you pay me after every 10 jobs? Please. Just to raise cash and pay d guy bit by bit as we have agreed. Please

Antihypocrite:
Boss, u are my best bet to come out of this predicament. Don't give up on me. Please I have devised a means to get a fone and continue the job. But I will need a favour. Could you pay me after every 10 jobs? Please. Just to raise cash and pay d guy bit by bit as we have agreed. Please

Why do you choose NL as our communication platform? So, you expect to drop a message here for me and I'd come and answer you? Please, don't quote me here again if you can't talk to me on WhatsApp or phone call.

samuelson06:
Why do you choose NL as our communication platform? So, you expect to drop a message here for me and I'd come and answer you? Please, don't quote me here again if you can't talk to me on WhatsApp or phone call.

Boss. Please forgive me, I got a driving job, it's taking my time. I dropped my acct number via text. Andrew samuel

samuelson06:
Why do you choose NL as our communication platform? So, you expect to drop a message here for me and I'd come and answer you? Please, don't quote me here again if you can't talk to me on WhatsApp or phone call.

Happy Sunday og. Just want to confirm if u got my text

[quote author=ublight post=115517563]Endtime123 has said nothing yet [/quo

See guys, i wish i can use voice note to explain critical aspect of marriage, typing for Nairaland explaining e know easy..

See last week or so, a guy on Nairaland said he broke up with his babe because the babe didn't have his time because of her busy schedule( SHE JUST STARTED ANOTHER JOB), I laughed i swear, That guy is heading for disaster.... Ohhk, he want to settle for a ladies that is not working, ladies doing nothing, all he is interested in is, make the lady always dey avail for him to Bleep abi? because the babe know dey avail he break up, I SWEAR A BUSY LADY IS THE BEST LADY TO DATE AND PLAN YOUR LIFE WITH.....So when you finally marry that babe when know get skill, that babe when know get work, and you need financial help in marriage, whom go help you? your wife only sabi roll waist on top prick, so she cant help you. One big mistake most men make is, you want to be the sole provider for the family, this is good, but remember you are not God, Also even if you can provide, still make sure your woman has money, her money should serve as RESERVE.

Now as a 30 Year old man, you can marry, you can start small, if you earn 100k, look for a woman that earns 100k or more. Combine your wealth and grow your family. Dont have that mentality of, you want to have more money than your wife so you can control her. I repeat, you don't need to have the whole world before you can marry, the reason you are having difficulty in settling down is because the choice of woman you TOAST are those type that there parents didn't train. When you won TOAST, your criteria should be her background first, not her beauty or curves, beauty and curves don't pay school fees. Am 40 years this year, my first child is in JSS1, my second child is in Primary 2, my greatest mistake in marriage was me over spacing my 1st and 2nd child. 99 percent of my mates, there first child dey Pry 4.

The koko is, date a girl when her papa spend money on her, date a girl when her papa train very well, when you marry such kind of woman in your 30 Years of age, before una enter 10 years in marriage una go done get like two houses or more, traveling out of the country would even be easy because you married a very and highly educated woman, but when you marry woman when her papa know even get garri to give her, the only thing she go get to give you na pussy and to dey move from one prayer house to another. This message is for you @samuelson06. know use old age train your pikin ohh

Antihypocrite:
I have been married for 3 years now, I have known my wife for 5 years altogether. She was and is still the best thing that ever happened to me.

I don't know where to start from, I can't come to terms with the fact that my wife is leaving.

Guys, I think the problem started last year after some hoodlums stole my bike. That was my major source of livelihood apart from some home lessons that I used to do, but stopped due to health reasons.

It's been difficult financially and I honestly don't know what else to do.

Shortly after my bike was stolen, I got a loan from lapo and added with my little savings to enter palm oil business. I wish I had not done so as I ended up losing about 80k because the guy I worked with cheated me whole heartedly.

My wife had to get a job as a teacher in a private primary school. I told her it was just temporary as I was working to raise money for her start a poultry.

In order to clear the lapo loan, I had to do odd jobs and take loan from loan apps. My wife's little salary of 20k became the major source of feeding while I battled to clear the loan.

Sometimes I would borrow from friends to pay the loan app to be able to borrow a higher amount from the loan apps again. This was a mistake and a trap cos now I am so much indebted to these loan apps. I am even owing some friends and right now I am unable to pay back.

I have been in debt for over 8 months now to these loan apps. They have tarnished my Image to all my contacts.

I even stopped going to church because most of my church members who received messages from these loan apps did not even care to hear me out. They believed the loan apps that I am a fraudster on the run.

My wife started feeling ashamed of me. She stopped associating with me in public spaces. I know she has tried. Nobody deserves to pass through what she is passing through.

This afternoon when she came back from work, she told me that she would be going back to her parents house

She said that it is best she goes back to her people until I am able to sort my self out.

Guys I have tried to be strong for so long. Right now I don't think I can hold on anymore. I have always believed that things would turn out well, but right now I am in a low place. I don't know how long I can hold on again.

Last month I tried to even get a security job that pays 25k monthly. But I feel so discouraged to do the job. How long will I work to clear a loan of 320k that keeps adding interest daily.

Thoughts of suicide have been crossing my mind today. I really need help

What can I do? I don't even have the energy to pray. Has anyone ever been in my shoes? If yes how did you come out?

Are you a graduate?
If yes,let me know so that I can foward a company email for a quick interview

okine4real:
The koko is, date a girl when her papa spend money on her, date a girl when her papa train very well, when you marry such kind of woman in your 30 Years of age, before una enter 10 years in marriage una go done get like two houses or more, traveling out of the country would even be easy because you married a very and highly educated woman, but when you marry woman when her papa know even get garri to give her, the only thing she go get to give you na pussy and to dey move from one prayer house to another. This message is for you @samuelson06. know use old age train your pikin ohh

Thanks for your concern bro. When you say don't use old age to train your children, can you define old age of the man and the age range of the children in this regard? And when talking about dating a girl that can contribute to the marriage, what if you can't find one?

samuelson06:
Thanks for your concern bro. When you say don't use old age to train your children, can you define old age of the man and the age range of the children in this regard? And when talking about dating a girl that can contribute to the marriage, what if you can't find one?

Observe this senerio, most parents from 60 years are not doing well financially. Am not saying there are not some that has money ohh, but what am saying is, majority are not doing well, so if you have a children you are nursing in school at this age, it means as you dey husle for the child, the child also dey hustle for himself. Now if you give birth at 30 years, Normally on worst case senerio, at 25, your child suppose to done finish university and should be able to stand on his or her own. 30 years plus 25 years, you are 55 years, worst case, at 60 years all your children done comot for your hand. At 30 years, as a father you have strenght to hustle and good mental ability to lead your family, but from 45 years, it's decreases, at 50, it's decreasing, at 60 mostimes, you don't even care if your children done eat or not, at that stage, most parents are tired of 9ja wahala, so they leave the children to go face there problem themselves. So imagine when at 40 years your children done dey enter secondary school, another good advantage of marrying early is, you become more focused, no matter how body dey sweet you, before you spend money to do faji, (groove)you go done put into consideration your family and school fee, I can go on and on..

Girls that can contribute to marriage, brother them plenty well well. Even Inside getto, there are still people that came out successful. You see, a man attracts what he wants, leave flasher girls alone, marriage na different ball game, there are constant bills to pay, forget babe with curves, curves know go help you solve money issue for marriage mostly when you get rent to pay and business dey messup? That babe when dey work and dey drive her, na that type you need, but search for the humble one. There are plenty ladies looking for a responsible man, if they see am say you dey responsible, them self go relax, it's not easy too, but I have one saying, START EARLY, YOU WOULD MAKE MISTAKES EARLY AND YOU WOULD CORRECT YOUR MISTAKE EARLY, BUT START LATE AND YOU KNOW THE REST.

If you stay in Lagos, make we sit down and discuss, I guarantee you, you go change your mind.. it's not easy ohh, if I look at myself, sometimes I go dey vex, I go make money, but I know fit groove my money, sometimes I go dey say, which kind family wahala I done enter, but again when I see my Son, my Daughters, I go just dey happy. You hardly see a man of 40 years and him child dey secondary school, but it's more common for a woman. I started early...I didnot marry a working class woman, infact my wife na opposite of me, the truth is, I dey feel the effect of not marrying a working class or a woman that can help me financially, but luckily for me, myself and my family know lack...

okine4real:
Observe this senerio, most parents from 60 years are not doing well financially. Am not saying there are not some that has money ohh, but what am saying is, majority are not doing well, so if you have a children you are nursing in school at this age, it means as you dey husle for the child, the child also dey hustle for himself. Now if you give birth at 30 years, Normally on worst case senerio, at 25, your child suppose to done finish university and should be able to stand on his or her own. 30 years plus 25 years, you are 55 years, worst case, at 60 years all your children done comot for your hand. At 30 years, as a father you have strenght to hustle and good mental ability to lead your family, but from 45 years, it's decreases, at 50, it's decreasing, at 60 mostimes, you don't even care if your children done eat or not, at that stage, most parents are tired of 9ja wahala, so they leave the children to go face there problem themselves. So imagine when at 40 years your children done dey enter secondary school, another good advantage of marrying early is, you become more focused, no matter how body dey sweet you, before you spend money to do faji, (groove)you go done put into consideration your family and school fee, I can go on and on..

Girls that can contribute to marriage, brother them plenty well well. Even Inside getto, there are still people that came out successful. You see, a man attracts what he wants, leave flasher girls alone, marriage na different ball game, there are constant bills to pay, forget babe with curves, curves know go help you solve money issue for marriage mostly when you get rent to pay and business dey messup? That babe when dey work and dey drive her, na that type you need, but search for the humble one. There are plenty ladies looking for a responsible man, if they see am say you dey responsible, them self go relax, it's not easy too, but I have one saying, START EARLY, YOU WOULD MAKE MISTAKES EARLY AND YOU WOULD CORRECT YOUR MISTAKE EARLY, BUT START LATE AND YOU KNOW THE REST.

If you stay in Lagos, make we sit down and discuss, I guarantee you, you go change your mind.. it's not easy ohh, if I look at myself, sometimes I go dey vex, I go make money, but I know fit groove my money, sometimes I go dey say, which kind family wahala I done enter, but again when I see my Son, my Daughters, I go just dey happy. You hardly see a man of 40 years and him child dey secondary school, but it's more common for a woman. I started early...I didnot marry a working class woman, infact my wife na opposite of me, the truth is, I dey feel the effect of not marrying a working class or a woman that can help me financially, but luckily for me, myself and my family know lack...

Seriously, I respect your guts but you see me like this: I don't like stress. I grew up suffering with my parents. I suffered through school. Everything about me growing up has been suffering. When I look back today, I usually bad. My father just allowed all of us to suffer.

We are over nine in the family and it's been really tough for my siblings. Out of the nine, only two or three are trying, the rest are battling poverty.

I strongly believe that if someone should ask my father to name some of his regrets in life, he'd most likely mention giving birth to many children without the ability to take care of them. Again, how many of us now can he boldly say this one is a man or that one is a woman? He's clearly seen that most of his children have failed in life. By the way, he had us in his prime.

Having gone to school; having tested raw suffering, I don't want any of my children to suffer. It doesn't make sense to me. Instead of my children joining me to hustle, let me keep hustling alone, at least for now. Once I start, and God helping me, I come get twins at once, I don log out be that.

I'm someone that believes in quality over quantity. Sure, time is going but I can't just risk it. What commands respect is money and once your children see the sacrifice you've made to give them a good life, they'll respect you. I've witnessed a child calling her dad a useless father. Guess what? The man lived with his family in a single room with shared toilet and bathroom. The child had seen everything about him and knew her father was indeed useless. Meanwhile, he had them (3 children) in his prime, yet he wasn't able to balance up before the children became adult and became aware of his situation. I can tell you for real that none of those children are living responsibly today. All three have gone astray. The parents are technically childless because those children can't take care of them. And this is the reality in most homes in Nigeria. I don't want that.

Sure, it's not easy and we don't really have a choice but to make children. But making children without preparing for them can complicate issues and render the whole family and essence of living useless.

Am seeing the issue from angle, i will use my father as an example, my father, fathered 5 children, all through i knew my father, he was a driver, my father know get shi shi, till my father died, his salary was 20k. we don't eat in the morning, we only eat at night. But let me tell you whom help the children balanced the equation a little bit, my MOTHER. My mother was a Tailor, she learnt sewing when she was carrying either her 2nd or 3rd child. She was working with UTC abi na UAC then before she lost her job, it was though for her, but she learnt it and became very good in sewing. If my father had married a slay woman, we the children and my father for hear am well well. My nother was more industrious than my dad. Now my father, fathered 5 children, yet he know fit send any of us go university, i remember in those days, even after secondary, all man go dey house because my father didn't even know if the children go go learn work, as JAMB dey jam him children.

Now you are smarter, you know that marrying a slay women cant help you in paying school fee. You know that Marrying a woman without a skill and degree is a recipe for disaster. Look for a way around it, the most likely logical way is, go marry better woman, forget those babes when e be say if them wear cloth all there shape go show and your dick go dey stand, guy those babes are what i call party babes, they are only meant for grooving, for marriage you need a woman that can be as strong as you. a woman that can even provide as much as you, normally a man would say you want to take care of 100 percent of house bills, guy that na lie, even God himself get Angels... You need a woman that would be your reserve, so when injury come, she takes over, guy inside marriage, you go see TOTO, i swear you go tire, everyday you would be spending money, look for a babe that is always busy, that is the kind of babe you have to date, the one always planning, working, improving on herself, not the once thinking of party and how to acquire IPhone 14...

Think like a woman, 99 percent of women falls in love with a guy that is rich not a man that has long dick, a woman falls in love with a man that is ready to settle down not a man that wants to be fucking her daily without proposing marriage. A woman falls in love with a man that can take good care of her first, before dick.

A man falls in love with a lady that is sexy, a lady that is jobless so that she is always avail for sex, a man falls in love with poor woman, so he can intimidate her with his little money.

Change the story of a man, Date a lady that is rich, Note you cant control her unreasonably. Date a woman that her priority is how she would improve on herself educationally, financially and at the same time, pulling her family upwards, Date a woman that has fear for her family(extended family) when issues dey between you and yourself, her family go put her in check....

Have you ever considered this situation, while being married, you need to add money to buy a house, i mean you get houses ohh, but opportunity just come say someone wants to sell a house and you dey short of like 3-5M in purchasing the house, all you just did was you called your wife and she loaned you the money.... Guy no marry any kind woman......

You and your siblings went through that stage because your dad gave birth to 9 children..... If na one you fit born, born am, start early... most important, know marry any kind woman.....

The Major message am passing to you is, don't marry any kind of woman.... marrying any kind of woman dey drag marriage back.... there is know point having a slay queen at home, yet nothing dey inside her head, she go even pass that empty brain inside your children head.

The reason while when woman discover say there husband dey cheat, the reason while them dey fight the side chick be say, them know say there husband na machine, the man dey provide for the house, the man dey take care of the house, so she doesn't want to lose the man, but when a man see say him wife dey cheat or dey try cheat, the man is ready to throw the woman outside, do you know while the man is ready to throw her away? BECAUSE THE WOMAN NO DEY CONTRIBUTE SHI-SHI FOR THE MARRIAGE. If the woman dey contribute wella for the marriage, the man o think am twice.

When my Son is old enough to get married, if the bride price of the wife to be na 1.5M and the woman dey work and her salary dey range of like 1M-3M. I go tell the woman family say make them increase the pride price to 3M, i go pay the money myself not my son, i go pay because the justice that lady salary go dey do for my Son house ehh, even baba God go dey see the effectiveness.

Peace out bro.

Just think am brother.

@ okine4real

I read every word bro. In other words, you are saying it's better to be a gold-digger than to just fall in love sheepishly Sadly, my girl isn't earning much and we are very committed to each other. It'll be very tough to break up with her at this time. I understand you perfectly and I wish I wasn't in a serious relationship. I for take my time dig am out. But this one like this, if she pray for me, my life go scatter because I don promise am marriage even though we never chop belle full for now. Seriously, you are making sense here. And the funny thing be say na when you no get choice again or when you don enter your eye go come open.

you are saying it's better to be a gold-digger than to just fall in love sheepishly. This part made me laugh so loud, i laugh well well. You are not trying to be a Gold digger my brother, its called making a good decision. Falling in Love is good, but the point is, before you fall in love, the lady must meet certain criteria. Dont just fall in LOVE because say, your spirit like her, NOPE. You can like her because she is sexy, because she is funny, but when you talking of love and settling down, she must meet that high criteria, I always tell people something, and its, ALWAYS KNOW YOUR FAMILY HISTORY, SO THAT WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FOREFATHERS WOULD NOT HAPPEN TO YOU. My father marry woman when dey try small, but myself i married a complete poor woman, i loved her because say she fine and was very good to me, but inside the marriage i discovered, she been BEAUTIFUL has nothing to do with happiness in marriage, i discovered that she been nice to me got nothing to do with how i go pay house rent and pay children school fee. In fact, inside the marriage all those love and care she had for me was ONLY beneficial to me personally not to the marriage, In marriage what mattered first is Money then love or what ever follows. If you have money then your wife love and care go come rhyme with the marriage. But if you get money and your woman also get money like you or more than you, your marriage go be like honey moon daily.... but there is a price, she might be arrogant. So you need also check say the woman know be woman when go dey try be little you because she get her own money. As you done get woman when you won marry e good ohh, but know the result of your decision.

kaziblake:
Are you a graduate?
If yes,let me know so that I can foward a company email for a quick interview

No. I'm not

I need your contact abeg

okine4real:
Am seeing the issue from angle, i will use my father as an example, my father, fathered 5 children, all through i knew my father, he was a driver, my father know get shi shi, till my father died, his salary was 20k. we don't eat in the morning, we only eat at night. But let me tell you whom help the children balanced the equation a little bit, my MOTHER. My mother was a Tailor, she learnt sewing when she was carrying either her 2nd or 3rd child. She was working with UTC abi na UAC then before she lost her job, it was though for her, but she learnt it and became very good in sewing. If my father had married a slay woman, we the children and my father for hear am well well. My nother was more industrious than my dad. Now my father, fathered 5 children, yet he know fit send any of us go university, i remember in those days, even after secondary, all man go dey house because my father didn't even know if the children go go learn work, as JAMB dey jam him children.

Now you are smarter, you know that marrying a slay women cant help you in paying school fee. You know that Marrying a woman without a skill and degree is a recipe for disaster. Look for a way around it, the most likely logical way is, go marry better woman, forget those babes when e be say if them wear cloth all there shape go show and your dick go dey stand, guy those babes are what i call party babes, they are only meant for grooving, for marriage you need a woman that can be as strong as you. a woman that can even provide as much as you, normally a man would say you want to take care of 100 percent of house bills, guy that na lie, even God himself get Angels... You need a woman that would be your reserve, so when injury come, she takes over, guy inside marriage, you go see TOTO, i swear you go tire, everyday you would be spending money, look for a babe that is always busy, that is the kind of babe you have to date, the one always planning, working, improving on herself, not the once thinking of party and how to acquire IPhone 14...

Think like a woman, 99 percent of women falls in love with a guy that is rich not a man that has long dick, a woman falls in love with a man that is ready to settle down not a man that wants to be fucking her daily without proposing marriage. A woman falls in love with a man that can take good care of her first, before dick.

A man falls in love with a lady that is sexy, a lady that is jobless so that she is always avail for sex, a man falls in love with poor woman, so he can intimidate her with his little money.

Change the story of a man, Date a lady that is rich, Note you cant control her unreasonably. Date a woman that her priority is how she would improve on herself educationally, financially and at the same time, pulling her family upwards, Date a woman that has fear for her family(extended family) when issues dey between you and yourself, her family go put her in check....

Have you ever considered this situation, while being married, you need to add money to buy a house, i mean you get houses ohh, but opportunity just come say someone wants to sell a house and you dey short of like 3-5M in purchasing the house, all you just did was you called your wife and she loaned you the money.... Guy no marry any kind woman......

You and your siblings went through that stage because your dad gave birth to 9 children..... If na one you fit born, born am, start early... most important, know marry any kind woman.....

The Major message am passing to you is, don't marry any kind of woman.... marrying any kind of woman dey drag marriage back.... there is know point having a slay queen at home, yet nothing dey inside her head, she go even pass that empty brain inside your children head.

The reason while when woman discover say there husband dey cheat, the reason while them dey fight the side chick be say, them know say there husband na machine, the man dey provide for the house, the man dey take care of the house, so she doesn't want to lose the man, but when a man see say him wife dey cheat or dey try cheat, the man is ready to throw the woman outside, do you know while the man is ready to throw her away? BECAUSE THE WOMAN NO DEY CONTRIBUTE SHI-SHI FOR THE MARRIAGE. If the woman dey contribute wella for the marriage, the man o think am twice.

When my Son is old enough to get married, if the bride price of the wife to be na 1.5M and the woman dey work and her salary dey range of like 1M-3M. I go tell the woman family say make them increase the pride price to 3M, i go pay the money myself not my son, i go pay because the justice that lady salary go dey do for my Son house ehh, even baba God go dey see the effectiveness.

Peace out bro.

Just think am brother.

lhino:
I need your contact abeg

I have sent you a mail.

You aint replying

okine4real:
I have sent you a mail.

Simple financial education and spousal egalitarianism would solve this.

I suspect that your wife, in her own way, has been helping.

First of all, let this be a lesson to everyone that both spouses should be working, unless with kids in some cases.

People should also learn not borrow from Peter to pay Paul. With the explosion of loan apps (and their evil rates), and betting, I fear for our people. Every week, I read of someone offing themselves because of a loan app. It's terrible.

Finally, there is much more to life beyond your house, your immediate community, or your wife/family members.

Do not beg to stay in a marriage. Focus on working every odd job for the enxt 2 years, living on the barest minimum, to pay off all loans.

Antihypocrite:
I have been married for 3 years now, I have known my wife for 5 years altogether. She was and is still the best thing that ever happened to me.

I don't know where to start from, I can't come to terms with the fact that my wife is leaving.

Guys, I think the problem started last year after some hoodlums stole my bike. That was my major source of livelihood apart from some home lessons that I used to do, but stopped due to health reasons.

It's been difficult financially and I honestly don't know what else to do.

Shortly after my bike was stolen, I got a loan from lapo and added with my little savings to enter palm oil business. I wish I had not done so as I ended up losing about 80k because the guy I worked with cheated me whole heartedly.

My wife had to get a job as a teacher in a private primary school. I told her it was just temporary as I was working to raise money for her start a poultry.

In order to clear the lapo loan, I had to do odd jobs and take loan from loan apps. My wife's little salary of 20k became the major source of feeding while I battled to clear the loan.

Sometimes I would borrow from friends to pay the loan app to be able to borrow a higher amount from the loan apps again. This was a mistake and a trap cos now I am so much indebted to these loan apps. I am even owing some friends and right now I am unable to pay back.

I have been in debt for over 8 months now to these loan apps. They have tarnished my Image to all my contacts.

I even stopped going to church because most of my church members who received messages from these loan apps did not even care to hear me out. They believed the loan apps that I am a fraudster on the run.

My wife started feeling ashamed of me. She stopped associating with me in public spaces. I know she has tried. Nobody deserves to pass through what she is passing through.

This afternoon when she came back from work, she told me that she would be going back to her parents house

She said that it is best she goes back to her people until I am able to sort my self out.

Guys I have tried to be strong for so long. Right now I don't think I can hold on anymore. I have always believed that things would turn out well, but right now I am in a low place. I don't know how long I can hold on again.

Last month I tried to even get a security job that pays 25k monthly. But I feel so discouraged to do the job. How long will I work to clear a loan of 320k that keeps adding interest daily.

Thoughts of suicide have been crossing my mind today. I really need help

What can I do? I don't even have the energy to pray. Has anyone ever been in my shoes? If yes how did you come out?

As for the loans, write to each loan company to freeze the interest and work out a plan to pay back over 2 years with half the interest accrued gone.

Write even to the people you owe.

If they refuse, advise that you may have to file for bankruptcy. If you file for that, they get nothing.

Antihypocrite:
I have been married for 3 years now, I have known my wife for 5 years altogether. She was and is still the best thing that ever happened to me.

I don't know where to start from, I can't come to terms with the fact that my wife is leaving.

Guys, I think the problem started last year after some hoodlums stole my bike. That was my major source of livelihood apart from some home lessons that I used to do, but stopped due to health reasons.

It's been difficult financially and I honestly don't know what else to do.

Shortly after my bike was stolen, I got a loan from lapo and added with my little savings to enter palm oil business. I wish I had not done so as I ended up losing about 80k because the guy I worked with cheated me whole heartedly.

My wife had to get a job as a teacher in a private primary school. I told her it was just temporary as I was working to raise money for her start a poultry.

In order to clear the lapo loan, I had to do odd jobs and take loan from loan apps. My wife's little salary of 20k became the major source of feeding while I battled to clear the loan.

Sometimes I would borrow from friends to pay the loan app to be able to borrow a higher amount from the loan apps again. This was a mistake and a trap cos now I am so much indebted to these loan apps. I am even owing some friends and right now I am unable to pay back.

I have been in debt for over 8 months now to these loan apps. They have tarnished my Image to all my contacts.

I even stopped going to church because most of my church members who received messages from these loan apps did not even care to hear me out. They believed the loan apps that I am a fraudster on the run.

My wife started feeling ashamed of me. She stopped associating with me in public spaces. I know she has tried. Nobody deserves to pass through what she is passing through.

This afternoon when she came back from work, she told me that she would be going back to her parents house

She said that it is best she goes back to her people until I am able to sort my self out.

Guys I have tried to be strong for so long. Right now I don't think I can hold on anymore. I have always believed that things would turn out well, but right now I am in a low place. I don't know how long I can hold on again.

Last month I tried to even get a security job that pays 25k monthly. But I feel so discouraged to do the job. How long will I work to clear a loan of 320k that keeps adding interest daily.

Thoughts of suicide have been crossing my mind today. I really need help

What can I do? I don't even have the energy to pray. Has anyone ever been in my shoes? If yes how did you come out?