₦airaland Forum

bukatyne:
It takes two to build a healthy, mutually satisfying home.

edoairways:
That is not an excuse.

bukatyne:
Why are you doing all these?

Why do you think you don't deserve better? Better here might not even be another man; it might be having peace on your own.

Why are you doing all these

Newborn27:
I myself.....I don't understand..... I've got everything and every reason to be alone and have peace..... some said I have low self-esteem.... others said I'm charmed while few said I'm dumb.


But the fact is, I don't understand why I committed myself this much?

Maybe it's because I entered this institution as a teenager.... Maybe my mind ain't healthy or maybe I'm too churchy.... I'm stock .....I just hope I'd survive All this and write a triumphant story.

guobe:
Are you not happy in your marriage.what is the issue.

Johnnyposh:
Plz I need advice from matured people here:
Am 25 and my girlfriend is 24,I met my girlfriend around late 2020 like October,we loved ourselves so much but am a kind of guy that don’t trust ladies and I don’t like relationships but I fell in love with her and we started dating,around February 2021 she got pregnant for me but am not sure am the owner of the pregnancy but the love I have for her overwhelmed me,she said am the owner of the pregnancy cos she don’t date or meet any other guy since we started dating,and I accepted the pregnancy as my own,her parent get to k know about her pregnancy after 3 months and she was asked to bring the guy that got her pregnant,I went to thier house for the first time with my mom to introduce myself as the owner of the pregnancy and her parent was kindda disappointed because they taught the person that impregnated thier daughter is a standard guy and am just a hustler that lives in a one room,her parents insisted that before we can come to take her away and take care of the pregnancy,we have to do an introduction before they release her,and I am a very broke ass nigga,like my phone engineer work is not functioning well,am just managing but I do some online Fraud hustle to survive,we told her parents that we should take her soon to care for the pregnancy first so after that,we can do whatever they want,but the mother refuse to leave her,after two months,I hustled up to get some money and I agree to do the introduction,by then the pregnancy is about 5 months,I called her mom that am ready to do the introduction and we fixed date for the introduction,then two weeks to the introduction the mother called me again that after the introduction I have to go to the registery to get married to her legally,I was so depressed and devastated,I regret impregnating her,I cursed myself that I wasn’t serious with my life and it ended up with suffering for me,I declined that I can’t go to the registry,I inform my mom and she declined too,but after another week I don’t know what happened to me,I then agree to do the introduction and the registry too,cos the woman refuse to release her to us and she is the first child in thier family, we did the introduction and got married in October
2021 and welcome a baby girl in November, I hustled up again and I secure a room and parlour self contain around may 2022 and I furnished it to my taste,I tried all my possible best to make sure that we are doing much better than before but still my phone engineering work is not bringing food to the table untill now and I don’t believe in this my online yahoo fraud activity to provide for the family,each time that I remember that I was forced to get married to her and I don’t have a good work that is bringing food to the table just this online fraud ,am always depressed and not happy.
And after my wife gave birth in November 2021,we use to have issue about her exes calling her and we use to fight about it and I feel like ending the marriage,I’ve reported her to her parents about her exes and I don’t want her to have anything to do with other men,but she has changed a little better now but it’s hard for me to trust her too.
Please am just a 25 years old guy and am so depressed and need help on what to do,my life is shattered with depression and I don’t see a good future for myself or the marriage,help me please,I have made a great mistake of my lifetime, please help me people,I need a good advice on what to do thanks �

okewumi:
Don't be carried away with what you read online. You are taking a good step and your marriage will work, Marriage is sweet, as far you don't do more than your self. That baby needs your love, Assuming your blood sister is doing her ÑYSC and she needs accommodation, will you push her away? Avoid having any baby in the next seven years and both of you should work hard

guobe:
A trend is now occurring in our society with most marriages crashing within 2 to 3 months of getting married.

All what most young couples care about is getting married but not staying married. They go about sharing asoebis and spending millions of naira to get married but will quickly run away from the marriage within a twinkle of an eye.

Most of the girls still have someone that they love more but choose to marry the guy that is ready to get married immediately.

Most guys get their fingers burnt out of desperation to just get married without properly dating.

I know a recent case study now as the new wife just left him as he complained to me that the wife was picking the calls of her ex boyfriend in their matrimonial home.

He said she even goes to visit her ex when he is at work.

It is such a shame what marriage is turning to nowadays.

Johnnyposh:
Plz I need advice from matured people here:
Am 25 and my girlfriend is 24,I met my girlfriend around late 2020 like October,we loved ourselves so much but am a kind of guy that don’t trust ladies and I don’t like relationships but I fell in love with her and we started dating,around February 2021 she got pregnant for me but am not sure am the owner of the pregnancy but the love I have for her overwhelmed me,she said am the owner of the pregnancy cos she don’t date or meet any other guy since we started dating,and I accepted the pregnancy as my own,her parent get to k know about her pregnancy after 3 months and she was asked to bring the guy that got her pregnant,I went to thier house for the first time with my mom to introduce myself as the owner of the pregnancy and her parent was kindda disappointed because they taught the person that impregnated thier daughter is a standard guy and am just a hustler that lives in a one room,her parents insisted that before we can come to take her away and take care of the pregnancy,we have to do an introduction before they release her,and I am a very broke ass nigga,like my phone engineer work is not functioning well,am just managing but I do some online Fraud hustle to survive,we told her parents that we should take her soon to care for the pregnancy first so after that,we can do whatever they want,but the mother refuse to leave her,after two months,I hustled up to get some money and I agree to do the introduction,by then the pregnancy is about 5 months,I called her mom that am ready to do the introduction and we fixed date for the introduction,then two weeks to the introduction the mother called me again that after the introduction I have to go to the registery to get married to her legally,I was so depressed and devastated,I regret impregnating her,I cursed myself that I wasn’t serious with my life and it ended up with suffering for me,I declined that I can’t go to the registry,I inform my mom and she declined too,but after another week I don’t know what happened to me,I then agree to do the introduction and the registry too,cos the woman refuse to release her to us and she is the first child in thier family, we did the introduction and got married in October
2021 and welcome a baby girl in November, I hustled up again and I secure a room and parlour self contain around may 2022 and I furnished it to my taste,I tried all my possible best to make sure that we are doing much better than before but still my phone engineering work is not bringing food to the table untill now and I don’t believe in this my online yahoo fraud activity to provide for the family,each time that I remember that I was forced to get married to her and I don’t have a good work that is bringing food to the table just this online fraud ,am always depressed and not happy.
And after my wife gave birth in November 2021,we use to have issue about her exes calling her and we use to fight about it and I feel like ending the marriage,I’ve reported her to her parents about her exes and I don’t want her to have anything to do with other men,but she has changed a little better now but it’s hard for me to trust her too.
Please am just a 25 years old guy and am so depressed and need help on what to do,my life is shattered with depression and I don’t see a good future for myself or the marriage,help me please,I have made a great mistake of my lifetime, please help me people,I need a good advice on what to do thanks �

HITsquad:
Lol Marriage no be by false... Even Elon Musk and Mayweather with all their money are still not married.

Una dey copy western culture but una no dey copy the best part of it.

Marriage is just a pressure from the society... There is nothing fun about it, just stress!

As man just Hustle for your money and father as many children as you want outside wedlock. That's it.

Life is very simple... Don't let culture, traditional, social trend or environmental mentality pressure you into doing what you don't really want to do.

Life is too short... Shorter than you know... Use that short period and live a life that is best for you.. Not for others.

I got 2 beautiful kids out of wedlock and number 3 is on my to-do list next year.
3 kids is all I need. marriage is the last thing i think about.

If my parents or kinsmen want otherwise, well they should go and marry on my behalf. That's their business...

Amarisco:
force*

Amarisco:
Many of us will experience a deep, true, and profound love + marriage. Don’t be angry at the world if you carelessly threw away the opportunity to have yours

HITsquad:
Lmaoo I will try and correct that one, not cos I give a fvck.. But for old time sake!

coming from a co captain who abandons a ship in the middle of a storm without saying goodbye at least...

Leaving the other captain wondering where the hell to start...

Well it all turned out perfect...

Blessedmercy8:
It will crash before now. When it's runs girls and boys that are going into marriage these days ,what do you expect?

The kind of places they meet themselves will determine how long it will last.

Most of these couples come from dysfunctional homes where there was no proper home training and are launched into the society with no character and end up with birds of same feather.

Gone are the days a girls mother will call her before marriage and draw her ears telling her to respect and obey her husband. You know, giving her advice from her experience and how to manage the home. Even the men no longer sit their sons down to advise them on how to take care of their wife's and homes. Everyone is after, "my child is a graduate and they go ahead and bill the husbands huge sums for bride price. That's all!

Clubers getting married. How e wan be? Tufia!

DonroxyII:
That's Marriage Built on "Dorime" and "Trabaye" ... Everything is On BamBam and If E no BamBam again Everywhere go scatter to Find Another Club where BamBam dey Trabaye ....

Once there is Economic Hardships, Morality get losts ... Humanities are not Supposed to Suffer for Economic Means because Our Mother Planet Can Feed us to Stupor and then We can Regulate Ourselves to Behave Normal:

But Once there is Self Imposed Economic Hardships by Big Men at the Top due to Our Greed, Everyone is affected because Everyone just want to Be Raving at the expense of Another then the Chain Reactions Begins across Humanities!

Only Few are Sane Even Me self I'm just semi-sane because You can't be Sane in an Insane World where you need to Constantly Check Your Back, Watch Your Folks, Friends, Frenemies, Businesses, Environments Even the Sky so Make Plane no fall for Your Head ... Then Watch God for Mercies ....

You can't just close your eyes and conclude everything is OK in this Era Marriage is not a Scam but the responsibility is just much to bear viz-a-viz trends in the Society ... Society doesn't even care anymore unlike before because Everybody gets dem own breakfast we dem dey chop

fairlyisabel:
why wouldn't it crash when men has refused to repent from cheating? Why wouldn't it crash when men has refused to censor their eyes and minds and focus on the women they took out of their parents houses? He who must come to equity must be clean

MNDY:
Nice one
On this quarrel, you and I know your gender to be the one to love drama/trouble more than the other gender.
A lot can be settled amicably if your gender chooses the peaceful approach to settle matters.
Even cheating can be handled by a woman behaving unworried, it will keep the man scared and ultimately make him change.

Trottle:
The trend is very worrying to be sincere.

However, when we choose to discard the old-age wisdom of doing in-depth background check and ensuring the necessary virtues and qualities are in place, and 'true' love/lost is not the main motivation to marry this is what we'll keep getting.

As youths we should also stop marrying to 'pepper' anybody, you'll be doing your mental health a disservice and also putting undue stress in your nascent marriage because you'll keep have to try to keep measuring up and ensure that the false picture you painted is not tainted.

Marriage is not a 100x100 metres relay race, you don't have to rush or go into it for flimsy reasons. Returning to the old (gold) standard will reverse this madness.

CC: MalignantGuest

BigMamaNaija:
Our forefathers and foremothers hardly dated or did it decently and had lower breakups compared to what we have these days.

This new pattern of 'dating' that encourages young people to taste and taste and taste different people and then go into marriage with numerous body counts; how can they stick with one person for the rest of their lives?

Na wa oh.

Nehyooh:
Bro, even with two body counts, only God knows how any times she did it. She may not even know the number of times herself.

So, the best is to find a virgin.
I can't waste my resources on a left over that now turned saint just to manipulate one simp to wife her after she don shared herself finish.

DonroxyII:
Virgin Doesn't Mean She will tolerate Your BS or You Will tolerate her BS ...

Work on Your Maturities and Reasonableness Bro ...

As per Your Believe that Only Virgin can make up a Good Wife Already Casted Your Maturities and Casted Your Home Self

Even if You married A Virgin, Once she misbehaved e mean say she no be virgin when you met am Shikom as per you head oo

livinbygrace:
The modern day marriage is nothing but a scam and that’s why it doesn’t last any longer.
Most of our girls now are not marriageable (No difference between them and road side prostitute) .
Go to higher institution ,hardly you see a lady without numerous uncountable boy friends .
And the worst part is that economy is not encouraging at all.I just got married after frolicking with plenty uncountable ladies in my mid forties but will tell you categorically,that I enjoyed my bachelorhood days than what am experiencing now.

Nehyooh:
Well, is not that i have the mind-set that non-virgin can't make a good wife.
But my personal wish is to marry a virgin, I've my reasons bro. Thanks

Nehyooh:
Bro, even with two body counts, only God knows how any times she did it. She may not even know the number of times herself.

So, the best is to find a virgin.
I can't waste my resources on a left over that now turned saint just to manipulate one simp to wife her after she don shared herself finish.

DonroxyII:
There are too many Virgins Around and Abound But You May Complain Dem no "Wake", Bookish, Nyanshless, Percky Boobs, Etc .... There can never be 100% Specs in One Woman so, Reason am well well and no demand Jupiter from person Daughter

All na Managements e requires

BABANGBALI:
you and this your made in aba English. You no go take gun kill us for here

DonroxyII:
You are Being Emotional now:
Trust me, You can't Bear the Masculinity of a Full Fledged Man ... He will run you till You run out of the House or He Kills You ...

You surely needs Help from Your Sisterhoods ...

This is not Always the Case But Mostly the Case with Most Men who is on Full Manly Nitro e.g Pursuit of Wealth and Powers as well as Maintaining Wealth and Powers is Very Draining:

The More his Body Demands from Him, the More He Demands from You, I doubt One Single Woman, With Home Care Responsibilities and the Kids, can Supply the Oils necessary to Cushion His Systems .. you Either Run Out or He runs out and Comes Home Chilling!

Can You Bear it

That's the Scientific-Facts not Emotions, That's Why Most Great Men are Gamers na person wey Cast be Thief !

That's another Crash to Marital Home !

The Only way is for him to Control his Masculinity which will also Affects his Life Affairs in Other Stratas of Life Hitheto Affecting the Home Front too:

Nevertheless, I blame men for the Bane in the Societies because these women are either Someone's Wife or Someone's Daughter whose Men have Failed them in their Masculinity and Manly Duties towards them:

The Courses of the failure Might be Either Objective or Subjective But Societies' Rottenness and Marriage Collapses Because Men can handle their Women

lomaxx:
Blame men for everything. What a way to take responsibility

fairlyisabel:
The type of a man you described above is not a full fledged man but a half beast- half human. Full fledged men are kind, patient, perseverance, faithful, loving.. I don't where you got your definition from

fairlyisabel:
English professor, if you are still cheating on your partner you are shameless.

BABANGBALI:
leave my cheating alone and focus on your English grammar.

DonroxyII:
Check Around the World and see for yourself The Life of Most Billionaires and Global Powers ....

If He Maintains Single Wife, He is Gaming Models Somewhere which His wife as Reckoned with ....

Or Some Marries Many Women with Numerous Girlfriends Join ....

You gree or no gree .... I no Concern !

If You are seeing Chain Reactions across men Over the Globe, that should tell you there is a Science behind it and that's Nature doing Her Things on Men to Balance their Workload and Relaxations if not Most men will die of stress without Fulfilling their Dreams Aspirations:

Women cushions Men's Stress

Just Marry the one not running on much Testosterone(Moderate Man) ... then Both of you will Come to terms if not .... Oyo is Your Case oo .. Single mom is just Loading!

Know Your Man and You would know what to Expect