If u are a young lady reading this,pls avoid any guy who thinks that as soon as he marries u,u will automatically become his servant for life. If u go ahead with such marriage,u will certainly regret all ur decision.

The man should be a helper and not see u do all the work like a Saudi Arabian nanny,many are already in regrets today because they all jump and scream only to be married and to face the ugliest part of marriage.

Marriage is sweet until ur husbands start seeing u as a partner and not a servant or a nanny. This is because,if u make this mistake now,it would be very difficult to correct it honestly.

All the best for those who will read to understand only.

But they all want equal right and a man who solely shoulder all the family responsibilities

Thewrath:
But they all want equal right but a man who solely should all the family responsibilities

Any woman who also think,the man should shoulder all the responsibilities must be evil minded,especially if she is working.

I don’t do domestic work as a single sef so it’s when I’m married I’ll start doing it? If I’m providing then she should handle her domestic work to the fullest as well.

Mitchewww.Trash as usual from a man being fed by his wife.

The people disagreeing are the same people that will kill their wives because of tea and bread.

Justbehave:
Mitchewww.Trash as usual from a man being fed by his wife.

If I don't have money at all,at least I have close to sweated and worked for.

Be calming down. I am not ur mate both in marriage and in real life.

For my wife,she will surely feed u and ur entire family add to it.

Last warning,if u don't know what to say,reading and not making a comment can help u greatly.

ibechris:
If u are a young lady reading this,pls avoid any guy who thinks that as soon as he marries u,u will automatically become his servant for life. If u go ahead with such marriage,u will certainly regret all ur decision.

The man should be a helper and not see u do all the work like a Saudi Arabian nanny,many are already in regrets today because they all jump and scream only to be married and to face the ugliest part of marriage.

Marriage is sweet until ur husbands start seeing u as a partner and not a servant or a nanny. This is because,if u make this mistake now,it would be very difficult to correct it honestly.

All the best for those who will read to understand only.

You Are Right, This Will Be Good If We Share The House Expenses Equally Too.

talk2hb1:

You Are Right, This Will Be Good If We Share The House Expenses Equally Too.

Modern families share financial responsibilities except some greedy woman who learnt their greeds from their home before getting married.

ibechris:



Modern families share financial responsibilities except some greedy woman who learnt their greeds from their home before getting married.

Eh No Wahala, at least we will share the family responsibility equally.
If You Can Help Find any Lady Who Will Agree To That , please recommend her at least I am still single.

talk2hb1:

Eh No Wahala, at least we will share the family responsibility equally.
If You Can Help Find any Lady Who Will Agree To That , please recommend her at least I am still single.

The problem is that,most guys like marrying women who are complete liabilities,I mean women who have nothing to offer in marriage except child bearing.

This,most times makes me wonder what most of these men were discussing during their courtship.

ibechris:



If I don't have money at all,at least I have close to 100million I sweated and worked for.

Be calming down. I am not ur mate both in marriage and in real life.

For my wife,she will surely feed u and ur entire family add to it.

Last warning,if u don't know what to say,reading and not making a comment can help u greatly.

Shatap dia. Audio millionaire. I believe you because here for naira land everybody na millionaire.

Thewrath:
But they all want equal right and a man who solely shoulder all the family responsibilities

No they don't all want that.

Instead, what is more likely is that you continue to engage women from lower economic class than yourself rather than your peers majorly because of low self confidence.

talk2hb1:

You Are Right, This Will Be Good If We Share The House Expenses Equally Too.

That will happen if you marry a woman who will share the expenses this instead of letting a lack of self-confidence on your part cause you to choose a woman of lower economic status in order to soothe your ego. Major regrets are what follow those who do that.

Kobojunkie:
No they don't all want that.

Instead, what is more likely is that you continue to engage women from lower economic class than yourself rather than your peers majorly because of low self confidence.

Will you force engagement on a woman? Or would you force a lady of higher class to relate/mingle with you?

Well,its a faceless forum,anyone can comeup with unfounded opinions about marriage without being married…you may not be married,so i don’t expect you to see things from the perspective of one who is married….marriage is practical and not theory.

Okay.

ibechris:



If I don't have money at all,at least I have close to 100million I sweated and worked for.

Be calming down. I am not ur mate both in marriage and in real life.

For my wife,she will surely feed u and ur entire family add to it.

Last warning,if u don't know what to say,reading and not making a comment can help u greatly.

I be talk am say na wetin make you create thread the last time dey ask whether N100m networth can be classified as rich in Nigeria.
I could see right through you
I go like ask ooo no vex,how many years you dey?

SeaTrade:
I be talk am say na wetin make you create thread the last time dey ask whether N100m networth can be classified as rich in Nigeria.
I could see right through you
I go like ask ooo no vex,how many years you dey?

That shouldn't be the issue man..but I am not am old man.
U are just following my topics around.

Keep it up since there isn't any insult.

ibechris:



That shouldn't be the issue man..but I am not am old man.
U are just following my topics around.

Keep it up since there isn't any insult.

There's no need for any insults.
Well ,I'd say middle aged.
And I'm not following you,that's a very outrageous claim chief.
About the topic,most times as an accomplished man who is sure of keeping his status for a long time,it's pointless to marry any woman because of financial support.
When women start supporting homes financially,they start demanding so much from you that you possibly adhere to.
They start feeling like they can lead/be independent and should have so much say in your activities.
This is not good .
A woman should be under the leadership of ab intelligent man for a home to work.
All that partner talks and equality is unafrican.
I will always advise men to marry intelligent women who are a step lower than them in the food chain and keep that gap till eternity.

.

Thewrath:
■ Will you force engagement on a woman? Or would you force a lady of higher class to relate/mingle with you?
■ Well,its a faceless forum,anyone can comeup with unfounded opinions about marriage without being married…you may not be married,so i don’t expect you to see things from the perspective of one who is married….marriage is practical and not theory.

1. You don't, same way hypogamy isn't forced on you. So, you have no sensible reason to choose hypogamy only to turn around and complain about the choice you made for yourself.

2. The forum is not to blame for the foolish choices of many Nigerian men. And it does not matter whether I am married or not. The point here if you choose a life of regret for yourself don't turn around and whine about it thinking we won't call you out your foolishness..

Marriage should be "practically" approached by way of common sense, not foolishness

Kobojunkie:
1. You don't, same way hypogamy isn't forced on you. So, you have no sensible reason to choose hypogamy only to turn around and complain about the choice you made for yourself.

2. The forum is not to blame for the foolish choices of many Nigerian men. And it does not matter whether I am married or not. The point here if you choose a life of regret for yourself don't turn around and whine about it thinking we won't call you out your foolishness..

Marriage should be "practically" approached by way of common sense, not foolishness

What kind of common sense tells you not to marry a woman of lower economic class because you think she expects you to shoulder most responsibilities?
Are you marrying out of common sense or love?

What every man should do if you have the capacity is to assist in establishing your wife to be supportive…..even if you marry a woman of higher or same economic class as you,a woman’s money is for her ALONE,while a man’s money is for the home…this is not something you learn just anywhere,thats why there is marriage course…man up to your responsibilities.

With the shortage of men put there ??

Thank God my mister is well Domesticated
He sees no reason to foist chores on anyone,but e get days wey his head dey touch sha

ahnie:
Thank God my mister is well Domesticated
He sees no reason to foist chores on anyone,but e get days wey his head dey touch sha

Na man wey get too much time in his hands dey get time for domestic work.

Imagine a man going to work before 8am and coming back by 8pm to come and cook or do dishes.
Yet the wife will still open mouth to ask for money to stock the house

No kill men abeg.

Contributions of some men here just show why they find it difficult to survive in marriage both home and especially abroad. She is not your maid. Women are contributing economically to households now. A lot are doing just as well as you are and have capacity to catch up sooner or later if they aren't up to you at the moment. Treat each other with respect and all will be well. You want good convos, good sex, beauty and brain, good organizer, good values, good education and good representation....yet you want to marry down as if you have attained above qualities yourself.
How will you find them steps behind you when you hardly have them simply because you want to maintain the old culture that favored your forefathers? They were peasants and married fellow or lesser peasants that didnt have the opportunity today women have! Women can now acquire education, properties, travel, have children outside the confirms of marriage, provide for themselves, attain the highest peak in the corporate world/politics, divorce without stigma.... times are different!

If you like, marry down the ladder. There will be a time when she meets you up there and the matrix changes. Unless you are Ned Nkowo, Razak Okoya, etc who married way below the ladder and make it a point to pamper them. They have maids/drivers for them, dazzle them with trips around the world, gifts them money like it's going out of fashion, completely provide for their households and gets doted on/respected in return. Even the most modern woman will be happy to settle into that routine. But If you dont have the means to keep your lower status wives in their places, dont think you can talk your walk through it. Sooner or later, the smallie go wise up. Ask Abraham Maslow how dey go dey go.

LINSAR:


Na man wey get too much time in his hands dey get time for domestic work.

Imagine a man going to work before 8am and coming back by 8pm to come and cook or do dishes.
Yet the wife will still open mouth to ask for money to stock the house

No kill men abeg.

You dont know women who leave their houses by 5am and return by 9pm for work purposes, yet they have children, husbands and household to tend? The scenario is normal in Lagos fa.... imagine them having husbands who wouldn't lift a finger in the house. The house will fall sooner or later, hence the reason for majority of failed marriages. One day, carmel go breakdown fa.

LINSAR:


Na man wey get too much time in his hands dey get time for domestic work.

Imagine a man going to work before 8am and coming back by 8pm to come and cook or do dishes.
Yet the wife will still open mouth to ask for money to stock the house

No kill men abeg.

Like really?

OP sir...

The truth remains that there will ALWAYS be gender roles in ANY relationship involving man and woman and I don't see that changing anytime soon ...

In an ideal setting, your ideals would be valid, but in the context of the society we find ourselves? Nahhhhhhh ...

Just as no matter how much money a woman makes, the man is still expected to foot the bills regardless...

No matter how much "free time" a man has on his hands or how busy his wife is, the woman will still be expected to do the chores...

It's the way it has always been and I don't see this changing anytime soon...

But alas!
Every married folks should figure out what works for them and not conform to societal standards especially on marital issues...

sisisioge:


You dont know women who leave their houses by 5am and return by 9pm for work purposes, yet they have children, husbands and household to tend? The scenario is normal in Lagos fa.... imagine them having husbands who wouldn't lift a finger in the house. The house will fall sooner or later, hence the reason for majority of failed marriages. One day, carmel go breakdown fa.

Omo nor be small quarrelling for that house?
Some men can really be lazy chores wise n also annoying

sisisioge:


You dont know women who leave their houses by 5am and return by 9pm for work purposes yet they have children, husbands and household to tend? The scenario is normal in Lagos fa.... imagine them having husbands who wouldn't lift a finger in the house. The house will fall sooner or later, hence the reason for majority of failed marriages. One day, carmel go breakdown fa.

This is why I can't marry bankers, doctors and the likes. If your job will affect your wifely and motherly roles, I'm not doing.

ahnie:

Like really?

I don't know what that means.