Kobojunkie:
Praying for what exactly? You both went to school.... your husband a former medical student... and are both aware it is mental illness, yet you believe that claim that it is an attack? Are you saying that your husband is not currently getting treatment for the mental illness?

You would have faired better if you had both first focused on making sure he got his daily treatment instead. It is not too late to start. And it will help should your kids ever encounter similar.

True talk.

The husband may not be in the right frame of mind to even remember there is something called psychiatrist and this is where a good wife steps in and does the research on his behalf.

By helping / steering her husband in the direction of the correct psychiatrist help instead of looking for SHORTCUTS and consulting illiterate clerics and their ilk, she will gain knowledge that will help her husband beat this illness and if God forbid her children inherit the same genes from him and it manifests in them then she would have enough knowledge to help her children beat it also.

If she had done some free research on Google, she would have realized that mental illness is treatable and is not madness nor is it a death sentence.

Jewessgratitud3:
Madam, if you truly love him like you claim, don't leave him. He's now a part of you.

You know it's not his doing that he has mental health issues, the best you can do is help him get through this phase until he gets back on his feet again cos if you leave him, you may regret the outcome of your actions if he plunges deep into depression and it gets out of hands
Or leads him into the street. The shame will be on you and your children.

Don't think it is Rosy out there. Every one has one thing or the other they are passing through that even when you hear it, you'll thank God. It is not better out there.

So it's better you try and look for help and find something to do in the meantime. cover your shame/man until he can bounce back again. Lastly, don't forget to pray.

I

Na them. Account opened 2weeks ago watch how he roams everywhere.

Kobojunkie:
The man is not at fault for being mentally ill and most of the world's brilliant minds struggle with at least one mental illness or another meaning that if properly treated, many mentally ill can in fact excel even beyond the level of their peers.

Again, I second the above and I once read that mental illness is the price we pay for intelligence and like you rightly alluded to above, a great many of the inventors and the super intelligent across the WHOLE world have one mental illness or the other afflicting them with some of them perpetually relapsing in and out of mental illness and in their remission periods some of them do their best works ever at times creating master pieces that have never been beaten to this date.

Some European Kings and Queens that had one form of mental illness or the other include :- Charles VI of France, Henry VI of England, Eric XIV of Sweden, Philip V of Spain, Maria I of Portugal and George III of Britain.

So, its not spiritual but a medical condition.

Konjiboii:
All I can make out in this story is that you are tired because there's no money, all that mental illness talk na just excuses to justify your separation.

Well said.

Ilekokonit:
■ True talk. [b]The husband may not be in the right frame of mind to even remember there is something called psychiatris[/b]t and this is where a good wife steps in and does the research on his behalf.
■ By helping/steering her husband in the direction of the correct psychiatrist help instead of looking for SHORTCUTS and consulting illiterate clerics and their ilk, she will gain knowledge that will help her husband beat this illness and if God forbid her children inherit the same genes from him and it manifests in them then she would have enough knowledge to help her children beat it also. If she had done some free research on Google, she would have realized that mental illness is treatable and is not madness nor is it a death sentence.

Indeed!

I expected her to have done pretty much all of that and hence my initial line of questioning is to ascertain how far they have both come in their search for the best approach as a couple. We are in 2023 when much of this information and lots of support groups are online, right at her fingertips if she ever needs others to talk to, nothing like back when I was growing up when no one pretty much knew anything.

OboOlora:
Sell the storyline give Zeb Ejiro make una use raise some money carry am go Aro😩

Actually na this kind of situation Daddy Freeze dey raise money for.

airsaylongcome:


Pharmacist. Developed country. This person is completely not listening to dialogue.

They’ll lose their license

I think that’s part of their fear. The medication is a controlled substance and requires more scrutiny

Draw a game plane of how to get treatment without affecting their profession and show them. If not it could get worse and hard to treat with time. If possible take a vacation and come to Naija to treat under a consultant psychiatrist

Medications are associated with identities in developed countries. The Pharmacy council might likely put him on compulsory break if he is in any psychotropic drugs

jeromestarks:
Handle your problem alone.
You rejected good men who approached you when you were younger and beautiful to marry this mentally retardant.
You chose your destiny. You should suffer it alone.

Never pity a woman who is suffering in her home. Good men came for her but she rejected them saying "he's too short, he doesn't have money, he's to tall, he doesn't have a car etc" and settled for a guy who used suya to bribe her.

Many women wished the men they rejected came back. But guess what, none will come back.

Are u sick?

jeromestarks:
Handle your problem alone.
You rejected good men who approached you when you were younger and beautiful to marry this mentally retardant.
You chose your destiny. You should suffer it alone.

Never pity a woman who is suffering in her home. Good men came for her but she rejected them saying "he's too short, he doesn't have money, he's to tall, he doesn't have a car etc" and settled for a guy who used suya to bribe her.

Many women wished the men they rejected came back. But guess what, none will come back.

This is one of the worst comment, I have read in July... how can you conclude things like this, do they write good man on someone's head?

bigtt76:
Encourage him to go see a doctor or if he has medications, continue with it. You can't abandon him now that he needs you more.

True talk.

Its treatable as long as he takes his prescribed medication DAILY for at least 6 months and gets at least 8 hours undisturbed sleep DAILY into perpetuity to prevent relapse.

I have a feeling that if the poster leaves her husband for another man, it may be a case of jumping from frying pan to fire as her husband has NOT wronged her in any way. He just happened to inherit those genes from his parent.

I am sure that IF God forbid their son who has half of his Dads genes were to go through a similar fate the poster will not be happy if his wife wrote an article on the net stating :- I'm Tired, My Husband Is Mentally Challenged just because he lost his job.

Losing his job may actually be a direct result of his untreated mental health issue which the poster wrongly claims is a family / spiritual problem instead of the simple common treatable mental illness that it is that requires seeing a Psychiatrist to sort out once and for all.

So, the poster should treat her husband the same way she prays her son will be treated by his future wife 'cos what goes around comes around. Its time for the poster to show her husband that she has human feelings especially since by her own admission he is a GOOD DAD.

jeromestarks:

She can't deny it.

don't be quick to make assumptions

Kobojunkie:
Got healed or rather exchanged one mental delusion for another? Where those family members cleared of mental illness by a psychiatrist or you all assume that because they have embraced religion they are now healed?

Religion is like opium to the mentally ill, I am afraid. It is like masking one problem with a multilayered delusion while your brain continues to deteriorate.

You are spot on.

Religious Experiences Shrink Part of the Brain
A study links life-changing religious experiences, like being “born again,” with atrophy in the hippocampus
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/religious-experiences-shrink-part-of-brain/

Religion can have the same effect on the brain as taking drugs, study finds
Researchers looked at how 19 young Mormons' brains were affected when they 'felt the spirit'.
When studying their brain scans, the researchers noted certain brain regions consistently lit up when the participants reported spiritual thoughts.

These are the same parts of the brain which have lit up when participants in previous studies have listened to music, experienced feelings of love and taken recreational drugs.

This section of the brain, the nucleus accumbens, is known as the the brain's "reward centre" which controls addiction and plays a role in the release of dopamine – one of the chemicals which control a person's mood.
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/religious-effect-brain-drugs-mormon-utah-reward-centre-nucleus-accumbens-a7446301.html

bravehost4u:
Just because he is now jobless and you are the breadwinner then he is mentally deranged.
Women and their attitude.
Madam you are the person pushing him to that point.
From the way you sounded here with statements like; he wasted all his resources pursuing abroad dreams, how you have been handling all finances, it his obvious you have denied him peace and pushed him to the point of depression with your mouth.

I have seen similar situations and almost nearly experienced one myself.

This your own side of the story is designed to paint you the perfect one and him the useless one. Remains his own side and the truth,
Until then stop frustrating the guy man.

Valid points you make above.

If only the poster knew what couples are going through worldwide in their privacy, then she will know that her affliction is common.

airsaylongcome:
What kind of mental illness could be characterized by extreme paranoia and beliefs that people close to you are actively seeking to harm you.

It may be Paranoid personality disorder.
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9784-paranoid-personality-disorder
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paranoid_personality_disorder

Passionate1:
Don't believe everything a woman says. .
Stress can cause mental health problems and people cope with stress differently. .

Actually Stress is a major cause of a myriad of illnesses including Cancer and Mental Health issues.

beautifulsoul12:
Good morning everyone. I can't even sleep at night lately.

I noticed that your post was timed at 4.41am !!!!!

You have to force yourself to sleep as lack of sleep can actually trigger erstwhile dormant mental health issues in some people.

You don't want a situation where Daddy and Mummy both succumb to mental health issues and there are 2 young children to care for.

beautifulsoul12:
Good morning everyone. I have to create this account to post this.
I can't even sleep at night lately.

I'm so tired and I need help right now. I have been doing this all by myself for so long now, without much complain but now, I need help.
Before I got married to my husband, I didn't know he had a seasonal mental health challenge, but not violent.

I met him in the university, he was in medicine, he had dreams, very ambitious, one of the best in his department, Working his way to travel abroad to continue his education. We were just friends, but I liked him. He kept on asking me out, but I declined. I wanted to graduate first.
We parted ways in year two. He changed school, so, I knew nothing about him again till years later.
Reconnected with him years later after graduation, to my greatest surprise, he didn't graduate, wasted all his resources and couldn't travel out. We still love each other, so we got married.
after the birth of my first child, I wanted to leave him, but I couldn't because he was a good man, but with too many changes and I was the only one who truly care and was there for him.
Three years ago, he became much better. He got a small job, Started bringing in little for upkeep. I saw change and I was happy. We had our second child last year after 8yrs.
Since early this year, the whole thing came up again. Since then, he became jobless again.
The financial burden is all on me. Right now, we can't afford to renew our rent.
I lost my business capital some times ago in wrong business, since then, it has been so much struggles.

I'm trying hard but it's not enough.
I'm thinking of working away, but to where? what about my children? Who will be there for them? What about him? But I'm tired of being in a marriage where I have to struggle for everything, where I can not depend on my man.
Pls, help us renew our house rent.

What do I do?

Reconnected with him years later after graduation, to my greatest surprise, he didn't graduate, wasted all his resources and couldn't travel out. We still love each other, so we got married. What was he doing at this junction before you decided to marry him? You know it that your school fees weren't cowries, so how did you intend to pay the bills?

BigIyanga:
you chose to marry a man who is unable to complete his studies as medical student.

Him not completing medical school is most likely because he had a nervous breakdown whilst in medical school (very common in Nigeria) and he chose his life over completing medical school. He who fights and run away lives to fight another day.

You will be surprised that if he finds a way to relocate to the UK, Australia or Yankee he will complete medical school with Top grades since he was top of his class at Naija medical school before mental health issues forced him to quit to save his life.

The situation in Nigeria generally is not helpful to peoples mental health especially if the person inherited genes prone to mental health issues from their parents (very common) and if the guy had been in the UK, the system there will have ensured he got the best medical help plus counseling when he fell ill and there would have been no need for him to leave medical school as the UK Government gives Uni students loans through out their courses with medical students being given the biggest loans since they can not afford to combine schooling with working.

If the original poster is reading this, she should not lose hope 'cos IF her husband manages to relocate to a country such as UK, US, Canada or Australia, then her family will smile 'cos he can then complete his medical school with ease and the family will then benefit from his huge pay.

In the interim, since he is a bright chap, he can enrol for ICAN, buy the textbooks and read for the exams at home and with his medical school study discipline, he can finish ICAN in roughly 3 years or less and then start applying for Accounting jobs.

Medical school worldwide has a high drop out rate and those who did not complete medicine (especially those who left due to health issues) should not be seen as failures 'cos most times they excel in their later substitute careers and they probably entered Med school because one of their parents or both forced or brain washed them into studying medicine.

Kobojunkie:
Synagogue of all nation don heal all the many people who don dey show up there for the very same year after year with nothing still to show for all that? Na to continue hooking others into the same lie una mind dey.

For your mind come and witness the power of God in Actions a trial will convince you.

beautifulsoul12:
Good morning everyone. I have to create this account to post this.
I can't even sleep at night lately.

I'm so tired and I need help right now. I have been doing this all by myself for so long now, without much complain but now, I need help.
Before I got married to my husband, I didn't know he had a seasonal mental health challenge, but not violent.

I met him in the university, he was in medicine, he had dreams, very ambitious, one of the best in his department, Working his way to travel abroad to continue his education. We were just friends, but I liked him. He kept on asking me out, but I declined. I wanted to graduate first.
We parted ways in year two. He changed school, so, I knew nothing about him again till years later.
Reconnected with him years later after graduation, to my greatest surprise, he didn't graduate, wasted all his resources and couldn't travel out. We still love each other, so we got married.
after the birth of my first child, I wanted to leave him, but I couldn't because he was a good man, but with too many changes and I was the only one who truly care and was there for him.
Three years ago, he became much better. He got a small job, Started bringing in little for upkeep. I saw change and I was happy. We had our second child last year after 8yrs.
Since early this year, the whole thing came up again. Since then, he became jobless again.
The financial burden is all on me. Right now, we can't afford to renew our rent.
I lost my business capital some times ago in wrong business, since then, it has been so much struggles.

I'm trying hard but it's not enough.
I'm thinking of working away, but to where? what about my children? Who will be there for them? What about him? But I'm tired of being in a marriage where I have to struggle for everything, where I can not depend on my man.
Pls, help us renew our house rent.

What do I do?

When things were okay, you didn’t want to run o. Now he has lost his job and things are not so well you want to run. You both are to depend on each other. There’s no written rule that the man must provide everything. You both should work hand in hand and work things out…..what if it was him that wanted to leave you because you lost your job and don’t contribute to the family?? How will you feel?

Coronavirus1:
■ For your mind come and witness the power of God in Actions a trial will convince you.

Power of which God?

▢ Jesus Christ's miracle success rate was at 100% when He was on earth — no one went away without being healed
▢ The healing/miracle success rate noted for His disciples is also 100% as there is no record of them not being able to heal anyone after the Spirit of God came on them

The miracle/healing success rate exhibited by all of your church pastors and mogs combined does not even come close to that of doctors. The infrequent and random pattern of healing observed in your churches mirrors that observed in the lives of unbelievers, pagans, and other religious folks. So tell me, how can any of the many churches out there be said to be of God?

beautifulsoul12:
I can be verified Sir. It take courage to come to the public and tell your life story. So many will love to hear the whole thing, just to laugh at you.

You don't have to use your known account to tell your story. Stay lowkey. People are wicked here.

beautifulsoul12:
Good morning everyone. I have to create this account to post this.
I can't even sleep at night lately.

I'm so tired and I need help right now. I have been doing this all by myself for so long now, without much complain but now, I need help.
Before I got married to my husband, I didn't know he had a seasonal mental health challenge, but not violent.

I met him in the university, he was in medicine, he had dreams, very ambitious, one of the best in his department, Working his way to travel abroad to continue his education. We were just friends, but I liked him. He kept on asking me out, but I declined. I wanted to graduate first.
We parted ways in year two. He changed school, so, I knew nothing about him again till years later.
Reconnected with him years later after graduation, to my greatest surprise, he didn't graduate, wasted all his resources and couldn't travel out. We still love each other, so we got married.
after the birth of my first child, I wanted to leave him, but I couldn't because he was a good man, but with too many changes and I was the only one who truly care and was there for him.
Three years ago, he became much better. He got a small job, Started bringing in little for upkeep. I saw change and I was happy. We had our second child last year after 8yrs.
Since early this year, the whole thing came up again. Since then, he became jobless again.
The financial burden is all on me. Right now, we can't afford to renew our rent.
I lost my business capital some times ago in wrong business, since then, it has been so much struggles.

I'm trying hard but it's not enough.
I'm thinking of working away, but to where? what about my children? Who will be there for them? What about him? But I'm tired of being in a marriage where I have to struggle for everything, where I can not depend on my man.
Pls, help us renew our house rent.

What do I do?

In your heart of hearts, if you were in his shoes and he's exhibiting the signs of rejection you're exhibiting, would you be happy? You're being selfish...

He didn't choose to be mentally unstable, stand by him as his wife.

This is why I say love is fictitious. If love is strong, why do you even get to think like this of your partner?

As for his mental issue, maybe there's a spiritual stuff he's to take after in his father's house and he's not been doing that because he's forming the educated to touch such. He should consult more.

.

.

Jewessgratitud3:


Ehen? What problem do you have with that? Or has she dipped hands into your pocket to pay the rent? I don't understand.

If you can't help her, pass. before you spoil other people's mind towards her because that is what you're trying to start here now.

Until we find ourselves in certain conditions, we will never show empathy to others.

Do not mind him, irresponsible follow.

Yankee101:


You see a GP when you don’t know your problem
She says they have no money
Go straight to a specialist, we have whole hospital units dedicated to mental health in nigeria or an entire hospital like yaba. A GP will cost money, if unlucky , wrong diagnosis before going to see a specialist you should have seen all along

He is not a doctor to know his problem.
GP is the first point of contact for any medical illness. What if he doesn't really need a psychiatric review?
GPS are the owner of the patients,even if a psychiatrist will discharge him,its should be to his GP.
NIGERIA Health system just doesn't make sense.we will get there one day

Basic123:

He is not a doctor to know his problem.
GP is the first point of contact for any medical illness. What if he doesn't really need a psychiatric review?
GPS are the owner of the patients,even if a psychiatrist will discharge him,its should be to his GP.
NIGERIA Health system just doesn't make sense.we will get there one day

Just because you see a system in the UK doesn’t mean everyone must adopt it

In the US you go straight to your problem’s solution, if you know your problem

Referrals happen when you don’t know what ails you. A pregnant women goes to her O&G, etc

That’s why the UK system is backed up with untenable waiting lists

Kobojunkie:
1. Audio believers .... we know una. Na religion full una head and nothing of Jesus Christ.

2. So how many times will you invoke or rebuke before this imaginary foul spirit vanishes then? When Jesus Christ and His disciples did it, na immediate things e be. But when it comes to you Audio-Jesus-believers na daily things that never come to pass, abi?

3. LOL...

Hahahaha. E Dey pain you say some people still love JESUS wholeheartedly.
I love Jesus darling and I will follow Him all my life!
HOLY GHOST FIRE PURSUE THE WORKS OF DARKNESS!!!

dealslip:


Abeg!! Run for your life. This person you are engaging with is a proper psycho!!! He is possessed. I have engaged him before. He will be asking you only one question repeatedly.

Honestly, some nuts holding his brain have fallen off or rusted badly. I wish him the quickest recovery

Kobojunkie:
Power of which God?

▢ Jesus Christ's miracle success rate was at 100% when He was on earth — no one went away without being healed
▢ The healing/miracle success rate noted for His disciples is also 100% as there is no record of them not being able to heal anyone after the Spirit of God came on them

The miracle/healing success rate exhibited by all of your church pastors and mogs combined does not even come close to that of doctors. The infrequent and random pattern of healing observed in your churches mirrors that observed in the lives of unbelievers, pagans, and other religious folks. So tell me, how can any of the many churches out there be said to be of God?

Come and see for yourself a trial will convince you

beautifulsoul12:
Good morning everyone. I have to create this account to post this.
I can't even sleep at night lately.

I'm so tired and I need help right now. I have been doing this all by myself for so long now, without much complain but now, I need help.
Before I got married to my husband, I didn't know he had a seasonal mental health challenge, but not violent.

I met him in the university, he was in medicine, he had dreams, very ambitious, one of the best in his department, Working his way to travel abroad to continue his education. We were just friends, but I liked him. He kept on asking me out, but I declined. I wanted to graduate first.
We parted ways in year two. He changed school, so, I knew nothing about him again till years later.
Reconnected with him years later after graduation, to my greatest surprise, he didn't graduate, wasted all his resources and couldn't travel out. We still love each other, so we got married.
after the birth of my first child, I wanted to leave him, but I couldn't because he was a good man, but with too many changes and I was the only one who truly care and was there for him.
Three years ago, he became much better. He got a small job, Started bringing in little for upkeep. I saw change and I was happy. We had our second child last year after 8yrs.
Since early this year, the whole thing came up again. Since then, he became jobless again.
The financial burden is all on me. Right now, we can't afford to renew our rent.
I lost my business capital some times ago in wrong business, since then, it has been so much struggles.

I'm trying hard but it's not enough.
I'm thinking of working away, but to where? what about my children? Who will be there for them? What about him? But I'm tired of being in a marriage where I have to struggle for everything, where I can not depend on my man.
Pls, help us renew our house rent.

What do I do?

Hello ma'am...

I can imagine what things looks like right now around you..

First, you need to see there is a problem on ground and be super ready to solve it.
Try sit your man down and ask him if he truly wish to be financially independent and will be ready to bounce back.

Or better still, try and involve his family members (his mum as well) so he can be talked to as well.

Fixing your rent is something that can be crowd funded... But you know how online guys are, they will drag you well before help will eventually come.... But be strong and intentional for the result to come