₦airaland Forum

Show your dad some love, no matter what. Bringing personal matters online doesn't really make sense. Truth is, nobody get your time.

DaddyRochie1642:
Hope this is not superstory

Nothing strange in the story. Similar stories are very familiar.

Pootle:
another tori to play down a gender

u dey mind d op
she won't talk abt all d wicked things her yeye gender has been doing..come here with her cock nd bull story

Orlu13:
u dey mind d op
she won't talk abt all d wicked things her yeye gender has been doing..come here with her cock nd bull story

we know them

Greenfaces:
these things are too long. 2023 is almost finished. Please let's try not to do long long writeups again in 2024.

You just had to quote the entire post to spew this crap

LadyRosa2:
As the topic implies, this is a true life story.

Although my knowledge of this family started around when I was 19 years old.

I will call this friend of mine Sarah, the first child and daughter of her father. This true life story appears sad, and in my quiet times, especially recently, I'm beginning to feel sympathetic to both sides of the coin.

A few days ago, around 6 am, Sarah called me, and our conversation went like this;

Me: Babe, how far, this one you dey call by this time?
Sarah:I'm going to drop my papa at the park.
Me: for what na? Person wey just enter town yesterday? You for allow the man rest small...

Sarah: no be for my house, I don drop am, pay him transport, and still give am 5k to hold the body for the road.

Me: Babe, I dont support this one, in less than 24 hours your dad dey the Road for like 12 hours.

Sarah: That one no concern me, no be me invite am come.

A day earlier her father had called her from their previous location, he must have gotten there only to find out his 'ex-wife' had moved out. He decided to call Sarah, and she picked up, accommodated him for the night and bundled him back to the next available bus to Makurdi.

Truth be told, the ex-wife no longer lived in the slum he visited. She is now in a duplex, paid for by his first son. Let's call him David. David is in Europe and through one of my kinsmen, had secured a 3-bedroom duplex for his mom. His father is not aware of this.

Those children suffered men!

Big Mama, Sarah's mom was abandoned by her husband when Sarah was just 12 years old. The same year, Sarah was brutally raped by a neighbour because of 20 naira, while her mother was bedridden in the hospital after child evacuation. The father left while she was pregnant with the 5th child. Sarah would hawk all manner of foodstuffs to put food on the table. When she doesn't sell, she sells her body for peanuts to buy pepper and oil to make even the cheapest dried akro soup.

Her father had remarried and stopped caring about their welfare, a federal government worker in a good money-spinning ministry. He got transferred to another state and started a new life.

When I knew Sarah, she already had a child, a small saloon and four more mouths to feed. She would work in the morning and at night she would visit lounges. Life was hard, and so cigarettes and drinks became her god.Sarah till date is a chimney and she does so even in the presence of my husband, he no longer minds.

One cold night a couple of years ago, after we shared drinks at my place. She narrated how she and her siblings suffered.

" Sis, say my brother travel abroad, no be my power,na say God don look us say we don too suffer. David go gather wound for his body, from one Lebanese and Indian company to another, na so machine go dey cut cut his body. So so blue ink full him body"

I watched with tears how she broke down completely, spilling her wine all over my tiles.

"Sis, na 20 naira e take to lose my virginity, 20 naira!"

", My father...Wetin' we do am?!"

Two years ago and some months , she got a huge break. She called me to follow her to Transcorp Hilton and made me promise that I 'behave' myself.

We met this man, well groomed. We were half into the conversation when she looked at me with a forced smile, and said to me
" Sis, this is the man that raped me"

The spring rolls in my mouth turned into vinegar, my heart began to pound, and I could only see everyone but the man blurry. I eventually kept my cool but was silent the whole evening even as the man apologised profusely. My baby was beginning to cry, and I took the opportunity to leave their table because I was feeling sick and nauseated.

In less than 6 months after that encounter, he had secured a bigger and well-equipped saloon for her and had given her enough to travel out to buy hair.

Let's talk about David. David suffered oooo. I remembered one time I was going through her old pics and saw a younger version of David, sickly with his tummy protruded.

" My sister, na poison. My father come one day,, carry am go makurdi, na so person call my mother say make she come do carry her pikin before them kill am.My mother enters Moto, and as she stops for Keffi, she stand for Road dey beg for Moto wey go carry her reach makurdi, no money na. We carry am waka from one church to another before God just save that boy. "

I looked at the picture again and gently dropped it, still overwhelmed with internal grief. The first time I saw David in person after he graduated from the University ( he sponsored himself with the help of his sisters), I asked in bewilderment,

" So na this boy your father abandoned?"

Standing before me was a young man, fair, built and with a height I reckoned would be above 6. In inches. No wonder white women couldn't get off him as soon as he landed in Europe. He got married to one and life in that family changed in a flash. I enjoyed it for I got a cut from my father's kinsman when he bought a property.

Their father is no longer with the second wife, as she left him after three kids. He married a third and is now a retired pensioner.

Last night, while shopping together, Sarah was laughing and I asked, " Babe why you dey laugh"?

" When my father comes to my house, him dey ask me why I leave one bedroom go enter 3 bedrooms with my son. I tell am palee, this house no be rent o, na my house be this o."

" So wetin' him come talk?" I inquired.

"Wetin' him one talk again? Shebi waist pain wey my mama dey go through na say he left her when she was in her twenties. The woman has not seen Preek 4ck till today, because she carries church for the head. Woman wey him marry when she dey 17 years."

I choose to use the word ex-wife, but they never really divorced because the bride price paid is still binding. The fact that this woman who has suffered so much will soon be a mother-in-law to a German BMW Engineer in a few days is overwhelming. I wasn't surprised their last girl will end well, she's always looking like something out of foreign red carpets all the time. Like David, she is tall slim, surprisingly Conservative and intelligent.

Palee will be coming again to grace the marriage of one of the daughters he abandoned. Can't imagine his regret when he sleeps in a well-furnished duplex, away from the slum where he abandoned his children and wife many years ago, only to find out the first son from his loins bought that for his mother.

E go to pain am.

But one thing is certain or I think I noticed, David and Sarah still bear the hurt. The other kids have moved on, and don't mind being in their father's life.

You're a good story teller.
Momsy is the heroine of this story and Pman clearly is the villain.

Time always justifies. In due time we all reap what we sow in this life and hereafter.

Nollywood no do reach like this

I and my wife just finished quarreling before I opened this thread and I must say being old In Nigeria as a man is kind of scary.

Now, I had to call my daughter to be present before I before my confronted my wife. Cos through her action and words she believe if we get separated it will be my lose, cos she believe she will win the children's favor.

Now, this is a woman that will never accept her fault no matter how big or small the issue is.
I send her Whatshapp msg twice today and she didn't read nor reply the msg, this someone that's always on tiktok and always with her phone. I decided not to call till I get home, only for me to meet her probably on tiktok and I got angry, that's when I called my daughter to the seating room and guess what she got angry telling me she didn't see my msg and she wanted to deny but I reminded her that she was with her phone when I sent the first msg, cos I was home then.

If or when I eventually leave the house, what will be my fate in the future?

Listen attentively

Human beings live their lives at different levels of CONSCIOUSNESS and EXPERIENCE, and for most people Sense Happen to them at the evening of their lives unfortunately. Life is always in a constant state of change; when you were young you think your experience and positions at that time is the ultimate truth, but as you grow older you realize that you were actually foolish, like this, our conclusions and assumptions change over time.
I bet that the Man in that story had no intention of not taking care of his family, he only acted according to his level of consciousness and experience at that time.

For the wife and her children, let them do for the man what he could not do for them: forgive him, accept him and give him the chance to die a changed Man.

F*ck! Someone copied my life's story.

Dizzyyish:
I remember when a moniker, TheGidRedpiller, made a thread about his deadbeat mom and the issue he had with her. Most people on that thread kept calling him a bad son despite his tellings of the whole situation.

The truth is there's a natural bias in this types of matters, so much so the term 'deadbeat mom' sounds unnatural.

If a guy does something terrible to a girl you'll see all manner of threats towards him (whether that's appropriate is a different topic) from males and females alike, but there's rarely the same level of intolerance for a woman who does something similar (or worse) to a guy.

You see, our women are funny...I mean they're comedians.

I saw a video earlier this year about a notorious deadbeat mum. The lady absconded, left her 1yr old son with her mother-in-law and hubby. According to her, she wasn't prepared to suffer/struggle with her husband. The mother-in-law volunteered to help raise the little boy, so that allowed the dad to fend for the family. No one knew the whereabout of this lady, even though they enquired from her own extended family, no one heard from her.

Suddenly, this notorious deadbeat mum showed up after 8 or 9 yrs demanding to now have the little boy she dumped. She actually eloped with another man, got married secretly but couldn't bear him a child, so she remembered having a child somewhere...lol. 😂

Grandma who's uneducated & of little financial means struggled raising the child, tried enrolling the little boy in the village school. Grandma refused to release the child to her, even the deadbeat mum's family took sides with grandma. She wailed so much, the whole palaver was very emotional.

Here's the funniest part, they asked the fool if she would be able to identify her son if they met....she couldn't answer. 🤣🤣

Tales by moonlight.

Thephilosopher1:
Listen attentively

Human beings live their lives at different levels of CONSCIOUSNESS and EXPERIENCE, and for most people Sense Happen to them at the evening of their lives unfortunately. Life is always in a constant state of change; when you were young you think your experience and positions at that time is the ultimate truth, but as you grow older you realize that you were actually foolish, like this, our conclusions and assumptions change over time.
I bet that the Man in that story had no intention of not taking care of his family, he only acted according to his level of consciousness and experience at that time.

For the wife and her children, let them do for the man what he could not do for them: forgive him, accept him and give him the chance to die a changed Man.

You nailed it!!

Check my present situation just above your comments

Very interesting write up especially the interweaving of pidgin and the king's English.
Wow, a 6am call to gist is real friendship.😁

omooba969:
So the woman's bones would be very strong in old age ehn.

*Baba n dagbe at 70* ( 70 years papa going up and down, grounding pepper, wash dish, wash cloth with his spine not able to straight again)

70 years old woman can still effectively does that at 70.

Meanwhile, I haven't seen any female boasting, she doesn't need HUSBANDS but KIDS here , unlike several despair male urchins here.

Deadbeat children don drop quote

tete7000:
This is not comparable to Joseph's story. This story is rather about a woman who made a bad choice that left her children abused and traumatised. People can always choose right. If you can't choose right, stay single; marriage is not compulsory.

Did you read the story or the urge to blame the woman was stronger?

LadyRosa2:
That is what I'm most certain of.

But how the man who raped Sarah managed to escape justice is what I don't get.
But one thing is certain that if he escaped human justice,he can't escape Divine Justice.

Thephilosopher1:
Listen attentively

Human beings live their lives at different levels of CONSCIOUSNESS and EXPERIENCE, and for most people Sense Happen to them at the evening of their lives unfortunately. Life is always in a constant state of change; when you were young you think your experience and positions at that time is the ultimate truth, but as you grow older you realize that you were actually foolish, like this, our conclusions and assumptions change over time.
I bet that the Man in that story had no intention of not taking care of his family, he only acted according to his level of consciousness and experience at that time.

For the wife and her children, let them do for the man what he could not do for them: forgive him, accept him and give him the chance to die a changed Man.

I agree with your last paragraph but let's stop playing the devil's advocate for he man. Didn't he have people that would have advised him about cause and effects or are there no wise person around him. This looks like a man who seemed soooooo sure of his future that he felt he was very safe never knowing that life is full of uncertainties.

Thephilosopher1:
■ Listen attentively Human beings live their lives at different levels of CONSCIOUSNESS and EXPERIENCE, and for most people Sense Happen to them at the evening of their lives unfortunately. Life is always in a constant state of change; when you were young you think your experience and positions at that time is the ultimate truth, but as you grow older you realize that you were actually foolish, like this, our conclusions and assumptions change over time.
I bet that the Man in that story had no intention of not taking care of his family, he only acted according to his level of consciousness and experience at that time.
■ For the wife and her children, let them do for the man what he could not do for them: forgive him, accept him and give him the chance to die a changed Man.

He had no intention of not taking care of his family yet he took the following actions:

▢ Walked out on them without care as to how they would feed or fend
▢ Refused to step back in even after his daughter was raped
▢ He married another woman and even had children with her.....

Come on! The man intended not to care. What he did not realize was that it would all backfire on him in the end as it has done in the case of many before him.

2. Why? Why should they give him any of that? He left of his own will so they owe him nothing after that.

eepeepook:
I no read, abeg. E too long.

Na why una they fail for school.

LadyRosa2:
As the topic implies, this is a true life story.

Although my knowledge of this family started around when I was 19 years old.

I will call this friend of mine Sarah, the first child and daughter of her father. This true life story appears sad, and in my quiet times, especially recently, I'm beginning to feel sympathetic to both sides of the coin.

A few days ago, around 6 am, Sarah called me, and our conversation went like this;

Me: Babe, how far, this one you dey call by this time?
Sarah:I'm going to drop my papa at the park.
Me: for what na? Person wey just enter town yesterday? You for allow the man rest small...

Sarah: no be for my house, I don drop am, pay him transport, and still give am 5k to hold the body for the road.

Me: Babe, I dont support this one, in less than 24 hours your dad dey the Road for like 12 hours.

Sarah: That one no concern me, no be me invite am come.

A day earlier her father had called her from their previous location, he must have gotten there only to find out his 'ex-wife' had moved out. He decided to call Sarah, and she picked up, accommodated him for the night and bundled him back to the next available bus to Makurdi.

Truth be told, the ex-wife no longer lived in the slum he visited. She is now in a duplex, paid for by his first son. Let's call him David. David is in Europe and through one of my kinsmen, had secured a 3-bedroom duplex for his mom. His father is not aware of this.

Those children suffered men!

Big Mama, Sarah's mom was abandoned by her husband when Sarah was just 12 years old. The same year, Sarah was brutally raped by a neighbour because of 20 naira, while her mother was bedridden in the hospital after child evacuation. The father left while she was pregnant with the 5th child. Sarah would hawk all manner of foodstuffs to put food on the table. When she doesn't sell, she sells her body for peanuts to buy pepper and oil to make even the cheapest dried akro soup.

Her father had remarried and stopped caring about their welfare, a federal government worker in a good money-spinning ministry. He got transferred to another state and started a new life.

When I knew Sarah, she already had a child, a small saloon and four more mouths to feed. She would work in the morning and at night she would visit lounges. Life was hard, and so cigarettes and drinks became her god.Sarah till date is a chimney and she does so even in the presence of my husband, he no longer minds.

One cold night a couple of years ago, after we shared drinks at my place. She narrated how she and her siblings suffered.

" Sis, say my brother travel abroad, no be my power,na say God don look us say we don too suffer. David go gather wound for his body, from one Lebanese and Indian company to another, na so machine go dey cut cut his body. So so blue ink full him body"

I watched with tears how she broke down completely, spilling her wine all over my tiles.

"Sis, na 20 naira e take to lose my virginity, 20 naira!"

", My father...Wetin' we do am?!"

Two years ago and some months , she got a huge break. She called me to follow her to Transcorp Hilton and made me promise that I 'behave' myself.

We met this man, well groomed. We were half into the conversation when she looked at me with a forced smile, and said to me
" Sis, this is the man that raped me"

The spring rolls in my mouth turned into vinegar, my heart began to pound, and I could only see everyone but the man blurry. I eventually kept my cool but was silent the whole evening even as the man apologised profusely. My baby was beginning to cry, and I took the opportunity to leave their table because I was feeling sick and nauseated.

In less than 6 months after that encounter, he had secured a bigger and well-equipped saloon for her and had given her enough to travel out to buy hair.

Let's talk about David. David suffered oooo. I remembered one time I was going through her old pics and saw a younger version of David, sickly with his tummy protruded.

" My sister, na poison. My father come one day,, carry am go makurdi, na so person call my mother say make she come do carry her pikin before them kill am.My mother enters Moto, and as she stops for Keffi, she stand for Road dey beg for Moto wey go carry her reach makurdi, no money na. We carry am waka from one church to another before God just save that boy. "

I looked at the picture again and gently dropped it, still overwhelmed with internal grief. The first time I saw David in person after he graduated from the University ( he sponsored himself with the help of his sisters), I asked in bewilderment,

" So na this boy your father abandoned?"

Standing before me was a young man, fair, built and with a height I reckoned would be above 6. In inches. No wonder white women couldn't get off him as soon as he landed in Europe. He got married to one and life in that family changed in a flash. I enjoyed it for I got a cut from my father's kinsman when he bought a property.

Their father is no longer with the second wife, as she left him after three kids. He married a third and is now a retired pensioner.

Last night, while shopping together, Sarah was laughing and I asked, " Babe why you dey laugh"?

" When my father comes to my house, him dey ask me why I leave one bedroom go enter 3 bedrooms with my son. I tell am palee, this house no be rent o, na my house be this o."

" So wetin' him come talk?" I inquired.

"Wetin' him one talk again? Shebi waist pain wey my mama dey go through na say he left her when she was in her twenties. The woman has not seen Preek 4ck till today, because she carries church for the head. Woman wey him marry when she dey 17 years."

I choose to use the word ex-wife, but they never really divorced because the bride price paid is still binding. The fact that this woman who has suffered so much will soon be a mother-in-law to a German BMW Engineer in a few days is overwhelming. I wasn't surprised their last girl will end well, she's always looking like something out of foreign red carpets all the time. Like David, she is tall slim, surprisingly Conservative and intelligent.

Palee will be coming again to grace the marriage of one of the daughters he abandoned. Can't imagine his regret when he sleeps in a well-furnished duplex, away from the slum where he abandoned his children and wife many years ago, only to find out the first son from his loins bought that for his mother.

E go to pain am.

But one thing is certain or I think I noticed, David and Sarah still bear the hurt. The other kids have moved on, and don't mind being in their father's life.

The father no try at all, is not good to be treating people badly talk more of your offspring. The fact remains he will forever be there Dad and their root.

nairalanda1:
Better learn to read long things...because one day, it might be useful to you.

Where is long writeup useful

@OP
I feel sad for your friend. She's really had a rough life along with her mum and siblings. I pray that she comes across a man who will show her true love to soften her heart and live a more balanced life especially for the sake of her kid. Mum and the other kids seem to have moved on but they all need to avoid being too bitter and to heal properly. Health is wealth.

As for their dad, he still has a family he lives with. Good luck to him. As he laid his bed, so shall he lay on it. Hopefully, his other children love and care for him.

This happened to someone I know.
I was told this man left his wife and toddlers and eloped with another woman. His siblings even supported him when his wife complained.
Now that the children are grown and married, he was brought back by some of his siblings, down with paralysis from stroke, pleading for forgiveness and asking to stay with the woman he abandoned.
He was rejected, though forgiven.

U no get work to know person own story like this,mtcheeeeww,I no even read sef.
Amebo,mind ur business and ur family

GreatAchiever1:
In 2024, try dey read books, it will give you the ability to speed read.

In what approach, reading silently or mutteringly?

Gentleman001:
In what approach, reading silently or mutteringly?

In whatever way you're comfortable with. But silently may be preferred so as not to disturb others with the muttering sound except if you're staying alone at that moment.

Ubanz:
I will wait until I hear the man's side of the story. Women dey always claim saints.

No matter how badly a woman treated me, once i can comfirm her children is mine, they will never lack my fatherly affection, guide and protection. Bad woman will only keep to herself

GreatAchiever1:
In whatever way you're comfortable with. But silently may be preferred so as not to disturb others with the muttering sound except if you're staying alone at that moment.

Gracious!!

erniok:
Did you read the story or the urge to blame the woman was stronger?

If I didn't read the story, I wouldnt comment. About the urge to blame, I wouldn't understand what you meant. What I know is that in life our choices shape our future, and when we make bad choices, we should always be humble enough to take responsibility. There are millions, if not billions of men in this world, and a good proportion of those are responsible too. When people marry bad, they ought to reflect and take some responsibility, they need to take a chunk of the blame and use the lesson learnt to advice the young ones to be wise in making their own choices. In as much as the man is bad, the woman too equally made a bad choice and her choice left her children with trauma. The children rather than allow resentment consume them should learn from the bad choice their mother made, and use that as a yardstick to prevent themselves falling into the same trap. The truth is that there will always be bad people, intact there are plenty of them, ours is to be good and be circumspect in choosing who we roll with. If we choose badly, we and our children will leave with the consequences. Just like Nigerians are living with the consequences of the bad choice of 2016 which has spilled into 2023.