It is common knowledge that many beautiful marriages in Nigeria, collapse few months or years after the families move to the western world. We equally read stories of men thrown out of their homes by their wives they brought over from Nigeria.

To be successful in your marriage in the western world, a man must manage his Nigerian wife that moved to the western world, the same way he handles his adolescent child. The moment a woman gets her Permanent Residence, it is natural that she begins to see life differently, and begins to express herself differently. Some of the things she kept within her heart that she had been tolerating because of her dependence on your visa, will no longer be tolerated. She will feel like a person who has gained her freedom from your influence. It is natural.

She will definitely have a lot of misconceptions about becoming an independent person that is not attached to your visa. She will try to explore so many things she may have been told by friends. She will want to press you sometimes aggressively or silently to adopt what she perceives to be the western approach to marriage. At that point, she is just like an adolescent who has just reached puberty. She will begin to express herself differently, and YOU MUST ACCEPT THAT.

She may stop cooking for you or doing the domestic things she used to do in the home. She may begin to live almost an independent life. Her general attitude towards you may change. She definitely feels like an independent being, and will begin to challenge you even in the most common things. She may begin to make certain demands that are strange to you as per how things are done in the home. She obviously would want to practise what she perceived to be the western style of doing things, which she believes to be superior. It may even worsen the moment she finally gets her naturalisation and passport. She may believe that she no longer needs you.

As a man, you must be careful in how you manage her during that period. You must allow her to enjoy the new found freedom. Any attempt for you to go head on or try to control her excesses, results to an accident, which may include getting yourself arrested or thrown out of your home. Common sense is required, the same you would apply when managing your teenage kids. Adolescence is a phase that comes and goes, same applies to her.

You must apply extreme self control, accept the changes, and give her time to find out some of her misconceptions she had about marriage in the western world. She will gradually begin to readjust to reality over a period of time, and return to her default state.

As a man, it requires emotional intelligence, especially self control and tolerance. If you don't manage that period properly, your marriage will collapse.

You the man must ensure that you are a role model to your wife in several ways. If possible, resist the temptation of sharing bills. Ensure that you earn enough to avoid dragging who pays what bill. Try and earn enough to foot your family's bills. She will naturally ask you to allow her pay a few.

Always improve yourself to make her see you as a go-to person, and that includes education and earnings. Allow her the choice to choose what she wants to take care of in the home. Never interfere in the choice of friends she wants to make; however, subtly advise her of the dangers you perceive. Never dictate for her, it will backfire.

Above all, try to be transparent with your finances. You don't expect her to be transparent with her finances, while she doesn't have a clue about what you earn. Also ensure that you play the role of a father to your children effectively. Don't also forget that her parents and siblings carry equal weight as your parents and siblings. You must balance your attention and spend on both families, almost equally.

Allow her the freedom she desires, she will come back to make you her best friend. Control will never work...can work for a short time, but will boomerang later.

https://www.facebook.com/1525879707/posts/pfbid02gFRufqsFTQCF9GaXTb5CJfhiA4LszrHFwPzeJJvVPBCuS41MJnEaTiy6Hr2VYTel/

You they crase

Darevofpeace:

It is common knowledge that many beautiful marriages in Nigeria, collapse few months or years after the families move to the western world. We equally read stories of men thrown out of their homes by their wives they brought over from Nigeria.

To be successful in your marriage in the western world, a man must manage his Nigerian wife that moved to the western world, the same way he handles his adolescent child. The moment a woman gets her Permanent Residence, it is natural that she begins to see life differently, and begins to express herself differently. Some of the things she kept within her heart that she had been tolerating because of her dependence on your visa, will no longer be tolerated. She will feel like a person who has gained her freedom from your influence. It is natural.

She will definitely have a lot of misconceptions about becoming an independent person that is not attached to your visa. She will try to explore so many things she may have been told by friends. She will want to press you sometimes aggressively or silently to adopt what she perceives to be the western approach to marriage. At that point, she is just like an adolescent who has just reached puberty. She will begin to express herself differently, and YOU MUST ACCEPT THAT.

She may stop cooking for you or doing the domestic things she used to do in the home. She may begin to live almost an independent life. Her general attitude towards you may change. She definitely feels like an independent being, and will begin to challenge you even in the most common things. She may begin to make certain demands that are strange to you as per how things are done in the home. She obviously would want to practise what she perceived to be the western style of doing things, which she believes to be superior. It may even worsen the moment she finally gets her naturalisation and passport. She may believe that she no longer needs you.

As a man, you must be careful in how you manage her during that period. You must allow her to enjoy the new found freedom. Any attempt for you to go head on or try to control her excesses, results to an accident, which may include getting yourself arrested or thrown out of your home. Common sense is required, the same you would apply when managing your teenage kids. Adolescence is a phase that comes and goes, same applies to her.

You must apply extreme self control, accept the changes, and give her time to find out some of her misconceptions she had about marriage in the western world. She will gradually begin to readjust to reality over a period of time, and return to her default state.

As a man, it requires emotional intelligence, especially self control and tolerance. If you don't manage that period properly, your marriage will collapse.

You the man must ensure that you are a role model to your wife in several ways. If possible, resist the temptation of sharing bills. Ensure that you earn enough to avoid dragging who pays what bill. Try and earn enough to foot your family's bills. She will naturally ask you to allow her pay a few.

Always improve yourself to make her see you as a go-to person, and that includes education and earnings. Allow her the choice to choose what she wants to take care of in the home. Never interfere in the choice of friends she wants to make; however, subtly advise her of the dangers you perceive. Never dictate for her, it will backfire.

Above all, try to be transparent with your finances. You don't expect her to be transparent with her finances, while she doesn't have a clue about what you earn. Also ensure that you play the role of a father to your children effectively. Don't also forget that her parents and siblings carry equal weight as your parents and siblings. You must balance your attention and spend on both families, almost equally.

Allow her the freedom she desires, she will come back to make you her best friend. Control will never work...can work for a short time, but will boomerang later.

https://www.facebook.com/1525879707/posts/pfbid02gFRufqsFTQCF9GaXTb5CJfhiA4LszrHFwPzeJJvVPBCuS41MJnEaTiy6Hr2VYTel/

You might as well just hand over your testicles to her, saying "I won't be needing these anymore"

Darevofpeace:

It is common knowledge that many beautiful marriages in Nigeria, collapse few months or years after the families move to the western world. We equally read stories of men thrown out of their homes by their wives they brought over from Nigeria.

.........................

Allow her the freedom she desires, she will come back to make you her best friend. Control will never work...can work for a short time, but will boomerang later.

https://www.facebook.com/1525879707/posts/pfbid02gFRufqsFTQCF9GaXTb5CJfhiA4LszrHFwPzeJJvVPBCuS41MJnEaTiy6Hr2VYTel/

Your article is skewed towards becoming a SIMP for the woman in the western world.

This is completely against some men's culture, personality and orientation. You will find it difficult to change those orientation and culture in the African man.

Hence, it is better decision, though it has its own cost because someone could be sleeping in your bed while away in the western world hustling, for the man alone to travel to the Western world and hustle, leaving his wife and children behind.

If you go there with your family, just have a provision in your mind that you could loose your family and resources; you could live in regret afterwards when your wife change am for you.

OP, there's nothing there to "manage" ...

Women in general, are naturally ungrateful and will at the slightest moment bite the fingers that fed them - this is a fact that every man must come to realize, accept and act accordingly ...

This is why I advice men, NEVER TAKE A WOMAN ABROAD (especially women from broke homes, IF SHE WANTS TO GO LET HER GO ALONE WITH HER OWN MONEY ...


Someone that is so broke that she hasn't even left her village, how do you expect her to act when you take her across the continent? ...

The way that woman will act when their men take them abroad is the same way a spoilt brat will act when you give them small power - ABUSIVE! ...


And ask yourself, why is it that the news of women who do this to their men when they go there are ALWAYS NIGERIAN WOMEN? ...

Why not other nationalities, like Asian countries, why always Nigerians? ... Why is it so easy for the African society (Nigeria in this case) to conform to western ideologies? ...

Omorr...
This is something we need to ask ourselves o ...
Cause I believe that there is something fundamentally wrong with the ideology of females - Nigerian women in this case ...