₦airaland Forum

millie0:
Long Post Alert;

Please pardon the multiple grammatical errors and disorganization, i wrote this with difficulty in my heart. Please read it and advice me.
Hello everybody. Happy New Year.

I'm in a dilemma and I need help. I have been feeling down and almost depressed for the past few days.

There's this girl that I met in school last semester. I go to a university in the US. So, I met her in like September. It was a school event and someone introduced us together. She's mixed, Nigerian and Asian (blasian). She's also relatively tall and she's older than me. She'll be 22 this year and I just turned 19 a few days ago. but i told her i was 21 as well She's also noticeably taller than me. She was a first year student and I'm in a higher year...

KingEarnest:
Please can the bosses in the house give this post attention. I'll need the answers too.

KingEarnest:
Please can the bosses in the house give this post attention. I'll need the answers too.

millie0:
Long Post Alert;

Please pardon the multiple grammatical errors and disorganization, i wrote this with difficulty in my heart. Please read it and advice me.
Hello everybody. Happy New Year.

I'm in a dilemma and I need help. I have been feeling down and almost depressed for the past few days.

There's this girl that I met in school last semester. I go to a university in the US. So, I met her in like September. It was a school event and someone introduced us together. She's mixed, Nigerian and Asian (blasian). She's also relatively tall and she's older than me. She'll be 22 this year and I just turned 19 a few days ago. but i told her i was 21 as well She's also noticeably taller than me. She was a first year student and I'm in a higher year (or should be).

When I met her, we just introduced ourselves and talked for a few minutes. I told her I was 18 then when she told me my age but she kinda forgot down the line. But basically I saw she was kind of attractive but I was not really interested. I didn't even try to get her socials or anything.

A week or two later, I was on campus and came to the residence dorms because I was bored. It was night and I lived in apartment off campus. I met her in the lobby of a building and she was leaving to go to her room. This was around midnight or past midnight. I decided to go to her room with her but I didn't ask directly. I just told her to use her keys to open the common lounge for me so we walked to her part of the residence and she opened the lounge. Some people were inside and I was like there's too many people. So we came out and I found myself walking to her building. We got in and she took me to her room, offered me drinks of my choice ( I picked shots of vodka), and we both took shots while we chatted. I didn't want to make a move because I was nervous and it was the first time. I left to my apartment later. But I got her snap here.

I didn't put too much interest in the situation because at first I genuinely wasn't that interested. We met again during another event and I sat beside her and we talked. She vapes and I picked up the habit during the summer so we vaped as well when we were in her room. I noticed that she asked me about two or three times to go buy vapes together. I wanted to go but I was kind of broke back then and also I wasn't sure if those were signals (how wrong i was). But basically, i kind of turned her down. I just told her how to get it because it was a new town for her as a first year while I've been schooling there for some time.

Skip, skip.... we were sending snaps and she sent me pictures of shots she was having. I asked her where mine was and she responded and said "COME!!!!!" enthusiastically. i was like okay, I'm in. So, I went to her to her room and took some more alcohol and she showed me some videos on her computer and we talked about a bunch of things. She even asked what kind of girls I was interested in and all that. I knew that I should have made a move on her but I was shy and nervous (story of my life).

i'll back track here to give you some background info. I've always been a nice guy with girls for the most part. I have these idea that they are like innocent and I should take things very slow with them. But, on average despite being short I've not had problems getting girls attracted to me. I always seem to Bleep things up though. Also, my first experience with a girl in uni in my first year went badly so I had some kind of trauma that I needed to unpack. Basically, it was the first time i got high off weed and it was with this girl in her room. I tried making a move when we were under the covers watching a show on her laptop but she removed my hand from her thighs the first time and I freaked out. I started imagining sexual assault charges and I actually started pleading with her in the room. She was giving me reassurances but the effect of being high amplified everything in my head. I couldn't leave my room for three days because I told she told everyone i tried to rape her. it was fine at the end though, she didn't tell anyone but that bleeped me up for a long time. i was always afraid to make a move on girls because i didn't want to come off as creepy and all. There was also another girl i used to hang out with. we'll be on my bed or hers watching but i never made a move or tried even though i wanted to.

Also, I used to watch a lot of porn and became insecure about my dick. erect size is 5'7 inches and 4'7 in girth. I always thought it would be too small and thin and girls would be dissapointed. so that also factored into my insecurity and anxiety.


Back to where I was. So, after about four hours in her room (yes, i know i was such a pussy) she made the first move. She faced me and put her legs in between mine and was basically giving me the greenest green light ever. In my head, i was like okay she wants it. so i put my hands on her thighs and started caressing it. after some time she went to her bed and called me to her bed. she told me to come to the bed. I laid beside her and after some time we started kissing and making out. at some point she went on top of me and was rubbing her pussy against my dick but we were wearing clothes. i was also a virgin too so i wasn't confident to have sex because I knew i would be rusty and coupled with my insecurity too. but we basically made out for a while and i touched her and all but we didn't have sex. i think she tried giving me a Mouth Action but i didn't react so she didn't do much. i was still insecure about my dick size and that's why i didn't whip it out.

I left and I went back to tell my best friend about it. he was saying i finally scored some and said he was happy for me and all. we're actually very close and share almost everything with each other, we share texts with girls we're talking to, ask for advice and run strategies and all. we talk about everything and everyone knows we're close. i'll link this later on.

So, i found out that i wouldn't be able to take classes for last semester because i had some unpaid tuition debt. so, i would be going to the nearby city to stay with a family friend until the fees were paid i could register for classes. this was last semester (september to december). i told her about it and i was sad because i actually to spend more time with her in school and all. she told me to stay a few more days and i did but i left finally.

i should have seen the signs, she drinks a lot of alcohol and has daddy issues. she actually hates her father. this will make sense soon.

i visited her twice while she was in school. i came to campus to meet her the first time. at first, she said nothing would happen but i still wanted to come cos i felt something would happen. And if nothing happened, i would just hang out with my other friends.

when i came i told her i wanted to see her. at first she said only in the day time and in a public place lol but at night when i texted her i told her i wanted to come see her. she went drinking with some friends but i later met her room and we hung out in her room and she gave me some weed that she bought. we got high and had sex that night. i think it wasn't special and i didn't do a fantastic job. i even couldn't come but i think she liked it because when we talked the following morning she said she enjoyed it.

but before i left, she told me we have to stop having sex and all that because she wanted to focus on another guy (he's taller and has beards and she likes beards, i don't have beards). she did tell me when we first kissed that she kissed another guy and that was him. i was surprised but i just assumed that maybe the sex wasn't good enough. i didn't tell her i was a virgin and i told her my body count was like 4.

When she said that to me, i was like okay. i told her my real age was 18 and she said she felt like i liked her and she didn't want to lead me on. she was interested in someone else. she was surprised about my real age but she said it was fine that her best friend that was the same age had a boyfriend who was 19 too.

i left and went back to the other city. we were still talking on imessage and facetime. and i discovered that things didn't go too well with the other guy because she kept telling me she was single and nothing happened.

So some weeks later she asked me to come see her. she wanted me to come and i said okay and i made some time. i came and we had sex again but i think this was worse than the first time. i was very lethargic and i didn't last very long. it seemed like she was disappointed and i tried going for a second round but i was too lazy and ended up not doing it. she wore her clothes and we slept together (we've slept together like three times). the following morning, after disturbing her sleep lol we did it again but i didn't last very long again. i was angry with myself but i knew it was a mental thing and also because i didn't have much experience. i knew if i was on campus with her taking classes and seeing her frequently the sex would be much better because there would be room for improvement and learning since we'd do it multiple times. but just doing it once in while places more importance on the sex and for me to deliver. i was honestly inexperienced and still insecure about my dick. we did it raw the two times i had sex with her too (thought i'd mention that). when i was leaving i asked if we'd still have more sex cos i remember the last time when she said we wouldn't but we ended up doing it again. she said yes.

another thing concerning the sex was that she liked me fingering her and she stops me multiple times when i do it because she says she doesn't want to squirt and mess the sheets. she also told me she likes rough sex and being submissive, dirty talk and all that. she even calls me daddy when we have sex but because i'm inexperienced and was a virgin before i met her it's not easy to do all that. i treat her gently and give her the girlfriend treatment but i think it's the nice guy in me. it was hard for me to treat her roughly but now i realize my mistakes. i remember telling her that at first i thought she was innocent but she laughed and said no. i also told her i liked bdsm and there's a chance that i would do it when next we Bleep.

Now, the point of this post is that she is dating my best friend now. i don't know how to feel. he knew every single thing about me and her but he still made a move. he's said he wanted to hit her but i didn't expect them to be dating. i know all this is happening because i wasn't in school so i barely even knows what goes on. to be fair, i didn't tell my best friend i liked her but even if he shouldn't have gone behind my back to date her. i don't even know how long he's been planning this behind my back and he didn't even tell me they were dating. usually if it was any other girl i would know but he kept quiet about this one and stopped talking to me much.

i noticed something was off but i didn't know this was the reason. and also her, i remember when she used to tell me when my best friend would hit on her but she told me she was never interested. there was even a time when she asked me if she should accept his invite to watch a movie in his apartment and i said no. but at the end of the day, we weren't dating so she's free to do whatever but it still hurts. she didn't know that he (my bf) knew about us having sex but the guy knew and still went to Bleep her and cuff her. This is soemone that used to advice me on how to move to her and all that. No, it hurts like hell. I used to consider this guy my blood and i trust him becuase since i'm not in school he's with my ps5 and tv. that's how much i trust him. we tell each other everything (him more than me tbh) but i can't believe he would do this. i haven't even talked to him about it and i don't know if i should. i asked him and he said they are dating but he never goes into detail.

another sad thing is that i can't come to school this semester as well becuase i have unpaid fees but they would be paid before next session in september. so, it makes sense if she's fucking someone else especially since i'm not around in school. I'm in the UK with my family now and I have to stay for about four/five months before going back to the US in the summer but it's like hell because that's all i think about. and since i'm with my parents and can't really talk to other girls i can't move on. i'm stuck with these thoughts.

like why did she have to date my best friend (she knew we were close), it would have been any one else and i wouldn't have cared as much and the guy is a snake because he knew about all my movements with the girl and still did this. he knew my intimate details about the sex with her and still made a move. when i told the girl about how he knew we were fucking, she said it was her fault for going for best friends and she was ass. Basically, she's sticking with him. I wish I was in school because this wouldn't have happened. It's all because I'm not in school but I'll be back in a few months.

At this point, i need advice on multiple things:

1. I'm tired of being a nice guy and insecure. I want to be more confident and improve my frame. Some girls i've messed with in the past say I'm too emotional and can't be a fuckbody because I attach emotions to it. This blasian girl said something similar, she said i was a loverboy. She's also told me to be more confident, stop second guessing myself and when we text, and i get pissed or something she says i act like a girl.

I need to stop being this nice guy. How do I erase it from the fabric of my soul because I've struggled with it for years and it has hindered me multiple times. That's also why I couldn't Bleep her the way she wanted even after she told me.

2. How do I improve my sex game? Genuinely like how to Bleep (do we use the waist/hips to control thrusts or it's the full body) properly. How do I last longer and get better erections ( I know this is cliche but i need something that works for you), how do i stop being insecure about my dick size (already told you measurements earlier)? But, if i bleeped her three times, that means it should be fine. I want to get good sex game so when i Bleep a girl she would always want me back.

3. How do I handle this situation? She was asking me how to make me feel better and asking if i was mad when she told me she was dating him. at first i thought it was a joke but they are serious but not too many people know about it. i messed up yesterday and let my emotions get a hold of me and i blocked her. but i unblocked her and she started acting angry to me and cold but i apologized. i've been acting needy though and doing too much and she complained today so I said i'll back off. if she doesn't text me first, i'll talk to her when i get back to the US in a few months. I'll still see my best friend (or ex best-friend) when I come back because we have the same friend groups and I can't avoid him.

4. How do I remedy this situation and still Bleep her again? I know it sounds stupid but my mind is made up. She's my first and she was actually good and I enjoy spending time with her when we Bleep. i don't necessarily want to date her but at least I still want to hit that. Also, it's a matter of pride to me because if they're still dating when i come back and i can Bleep her while she's dating some of my hurt will reduce. Also, i know i'm attached to her but I also want to right my wrongs and give her mind blowing sex to redeem myself and my sanity. How do I remedy the situation and still keep her on the cards? To be honest, even if you say not to try to Bleep her my mind is made up. I have to try at least, so please advice me accordingly.

5. How do I stop being emotional and acting like a girl. I react to things too much, take things personally and I'm insecure.

6. How can I keep myself sane and stop thinking about it? It's hurting my soul and staying here for months basically doing nothing is going to be torture for me?

7. Give me some general advice about game? How do I improve and go on from here.

Please I need comprehensive responses, I don't need a band aid on my wound but a full body surgery. I want to change this few months I'm here before I go back.

Thank you again for reading and forgive the errors and improper structure. I've been writing straight for two hours.

Pukkalolo:
luminouz, here is the interesting and counterintuitive thing...

Those trolls always dropping hate comments on this threads are actually playing an important role in making this thread successful...

Here's why... please read carefully. There's a big lesson to be learned here:

We are in "attention age".

Meaning, in this current age and time, getting attention is the secret sauce to being relevant and successful, and sadly it doesn't even matter if it's positive or negative attention.

Nairaland algorithm doesn't give a shit about negative comment/attention; as long as there's engagements, it will keep pushing the thread to the top.

I watched an interview with an American rapper who get millions of view on his songs and cash out on them. He said something very interesting. He said that, "half of the people that watch his music videos on youtube and stream his songs are mostly his haters..."

That's basically saying, "half of his music revenues and income are coming from his haters."

Most Celebrities understand that attention, both negative and positive attention, is the secret to staying relevant in the industry.

Think of it: Andrew Tate became a billionaire and became one of the most googled man on Earth strictly from his ability to garner attention to himself. The funny thing is, many of the attention are even negative attention, i.e criticism and hate...

Your ability to handle trolls, haters criticism, negative reactions is the secret to your success in any areas of life.

Using interaction with women as example, one of the major differentiators between me and the nice guy is that the nice guy is so much scared of being criticize, disliked or rejected by the women he desires, while I on the other hand I'm very "comfortable" with getting criticism or rejection.

How do the women cash out on the nice guys? Because when a nice guy is getting criticize by a girl or he sense that he might be losing a girl, he assumes he is the cause. So he try is best to impress her and do more and more bigger nice things for her.

I embrace criticism, rejection, drama, tension, randomness, uncertainty that why I'm never lacking pussy....

The nice guy is scared of criticism, rejection and being disliked.... and that's why women easily manipulate and exploit him.

It doesn’t matter how smart, intelligent or educated you are . The difference between the winnner and the loser is the ability to handle criticism, haters, trolls, rejection, failure and negative reaction.

I'm not affected emotionally by criticism, rejection, setbacks, trolls, negative reactions because I already expects those things to happen. I've already included them in my calculations for getting success..

You have to lose the battle to win the war. If you want to be admired by some people, then you must be willing to be disliked by some other people. No two ways about it.

Running from criticism and negative reactions only means that when you finally lay your head down at the end of your journey on earth, your life would be empty and filled with regrets. In order to prevent that, you need to ride above trolls, rejection and negative opinion of people -- and live life on your terms.

Anytime you choose to do something that is worthwhile, and you begin to climb up the ladder of accomplishments, the amounts of individuals who wish to bring you down increases. You'll certainly upset some people by trying to move higher.

Youll upset some people by trying to improve yourself. Some people would feel threatened when they see that you are making moves to upgrade yourself; they would criticize your moves.


One of my mentor once told me, "the best way to kill something or make it irrelevant is to simply ignore it."

Our goal is to continue ignoring the trolls but also to make sure they don't ignore us, because in a counterintuitive way, the more hate comments they drop and the more they don't ignore us, the more they make me, you and this amazing thread even more relevant and bigger.

Happy new year to everyone and God bless you all.

millie0:
Thanks for this.

millie0:
Thanks for this.

adambeatz:
Omoh², bro your case is strong, very strong strong, you'll need 2 virgin chicken eggs, albino ram, and pure ethanol as sacrifice to the gods to solve your problem, lol who am I kidding, let's get to business shall we...

You are 19, a very young age and as such have a long line ahead of you, from what you've said about her she loves badt guys and sadly you don't qualify to be in her books, if I were you I'd thank my friend for hooking up with her cause if she wanted you she'd have stayed. Brotherhood should remain your top priority and for no reason should a man make enemies cause of a piece of waist.

What you need ma boy is to invest in yourself, since your in the UK look for any tech skill and learn, apply for remote jobs and make some money, hit the gym regularly if were you. A wise man makes from his enemies than a fool from his friends, this should be your motto from today hence forth. Look for hookers around you and smash(use protection). Look at it from this angle if you were having side hustles that pay you'd have stepped up your fees and be able to hang out more. As for your guy who is shagging her, don't make enemies with him, it's obvious he is a player, why not fein the role of a fool and learn some tricks from him or don't tell me you see yourself marrying her if it is,i pity your descendants.

Love is war and in order to excel you have to learn the extremes of love and hate, then create your balance in order to win. I don't know which part of UK you are but I can link you up with a proper yoruba demon let him spoil you small. Remember; A wise man makes more from his enemies that a fool from friends, the ball is in your court now.

millie0:
Long Post Alert;

Please pardon the multiple grammatical errors and disorganization, i wrote this with difficulty in my heart. Please read it and advice me.
Hello everybody. Happy New Year.

I'm in a dilemma and I need help. I have been feeling down and almost depressed for the past few days.

There's this girl that I met in school last semester. I go to a university in the US. So, I met her in like September. It was a school event and someone introduced us together. She's mixed, Nigerian and Asian (blasian). She's also relatively tall and she's older than me. She'll be 22 this year and I just turned 19 a few days ago. but i told her i was 21 as well She's also noticeably taller than me. She was a first year student and I'm in a higher year (or should be).

When I met her, we just introduced ourselves and talked for a few minutes. I told her I was 18 then when she told me my age but she kinda forgot down the line. But basically I saw she was kind of attractive but I was not really interested. I didn't even try to get her socials or anything.

A week or two later, I was on campus and came to the residence dorms because I was bored. It was night and I lived in apartment off campus. I met her in the lobby of a building and she was leaving to go to her room. This was around midnight or past midnight. I decided to go to her room with her but I didn't ask directly. I just told her to use her keys to open the common lounge for me so we walked to her part of the residence and she opened the lounge. Some people were inside and I was like there's too many people. So we came out and I found myself walking to her building. We got in and she took me to her room, offered me drinks of my choice ( I picked shots of vodka), and we both took shots while we chatted. I didn't want to make a move because I was nervous and it was the first time. I left to my apartment later. But I got her snap here.

I didn't put too much interest in the situation because at first I genuinely wasn't that interested. We met again during another event and I sat beside her and we talked. She vapes and I picked up the habit during the summer so we vaped as well when we were in her room. I noticed that she asked me about two or three times to go buy vapes together. I wanted to go but I was kind of broke back then and also I wasn't sure if those were signals (how wrong i was). But basically, i kind of turned her down. I just told her how to get it because it was a new town for her as a first year while I've been schooling there for some time.

Skip, skip.... we were sending snaps and she sent me pictures of shots she was having. I asked her where mine was and she responded and said "COME!!!!!" enthusiastically. i was like okay, I'm in. So, I went to her to her room and took some more alcohol and she showed me some videos on her computer and we talked about a bunch of things. She even asked what kind of girls I was interested in and all that. I knew that I should have made a move on her but I was shy and nervous (story of my life).

i'll back track here to give you some background info. I've always been a nice guy with girls for the most part. I have these idea that they are like innocent and I should take things very slow with them. But, on average despite being short I've not had problems getting girls attracted to me. I always seem to Bleep things up though. Also, my first experience with a girl in uni in my first year went badly so I had some kind of trauma that I needed to unpack. Basically, it was the first time i got high off weed and it was with this girl in her room. I tried making a move when we were under the covers watching a show on her laptop but she removed my hand from her thighs the first time and I freaked out. I started imagining sexual assault charges and I actually started pleading with her in the room. She was giving me reassurances but the effect of being high amplified everything in my head. I couldn't leave my room for three days because I told she told everyone i tried to rape her. it was fine at the end though, she didn't tell anyone but that bleeped me up for a long time. i was always afraid to make a move on girls because i didn't want to come off as creepy and all. There was also another girl i used to hang out with. we'll be on my bed or hers watching but i never made a move or tried even though i wanted to.

Also, I used to watch a lot of porn and became insecure about my dick. erect size is 5'7 inches and 4'7 in girth. I always thought it would be too small and thin and girls would be dissapointed. so that also factored into my insecurity and anxiety.


Back to where I was. So, after about four hours in her room (yes, i know i was such a pussy) she made the first move. She faced me and put her legs in between mine and was basically giving me the greenest green light ever. In my head, i was like okay she wants it. so i put my hands on her thighs and started caressing it. after some time she went to her bed and called me to her bed. she told me to come to the bed. I laid beside her and after some time we started kissing and making out. at some point she went on top of me and was rubbing her pussy against my dick but we were wearing clothes. i was also a virgin too so i wasn't confident to have sex because I knew i would be rusty and coupled with my insecurity too. but we basically made out for a while and i touched her and all but we didn't have sex. i think she tried giving me a Mouth Action but i didn't react so she didn't do much. i was still insecure about my dick size and that's why i didn't whip it out.

I left and I went back to tell my best friend about it. he was saying i finally scored some and said he was happy for me and all. we're actually very close and share almost everything with each other, we share texts with girls we're talking to, ask for advice and run strategies and all. we talk about everything and everyone knows we're close. i'll link this later on.

So, i found out that i wouldn't be able to take classes for last semester because i had some unpaid tuition debt. so, i would be going to the nearby city to stay with a family friend until the fees were paid i could register for classes. this was last semester (september to december). i told her about it and i was sad because i actually to spend more time with her in school and all. she told me to stay a few more days and i did but i left finally.

i should have seen the signs, she drinks a lot of alcohol and has daddy issues. she actually hates her father. this will make sense soon.

i visited her twice while she was in school. i came to campus to meet her the first time. at first, she said nothing would happen but i still wanted to come cos i felt something would happen. And if nothing happened, i would just hang out with my other friends.

when i came i told her i wanted to see her. at first she said only in the day time and in a public place lol but at night when i texted her i told her i wanted to come see her. she went drinking with some friends but i later met her room and we hung out in her room and she gave me some weed that she bought. we got high and had sex that night. i think it wasn't special and i didn't do a fantastic job. i even couldn't come but i think she liked it because when we talked the following morning she said she enjoyed it.

but before i left, she told me we have to stop having sex and all that because she wanted to focus on another guy (he's taller and has beards and she likes beards, i don't have beards). she did tell me when we first kissed that she kissed another guy and that was him. i was surprised but i just assumed that maybe the sex wasn't good enough. i didn't tell her i was a virgin and i told her my body count was like 4.

When she said that to me, i was like okay. i told her my real age was 18 and she said she felt like i liked her and she didn't want to lead me on. she was interested in someone else. she was surprised about my real age but she said it was fine that her best friend that was the same age had a boyfriend who was 19 too.

i left and went back to the other city. we were still talking on imessage and facetime. and i discovered that things didn't go too well with the other guy because she kept telling me she was single and nothing happened.

So some weeks later she asked me to come see her. she wanted me to come and i said okay and i made some time. i came and we had sex again but i think this was worse than the first time. i was very lethargic and i didn't last very long. it seemed like she was disappointed and i tried going for a second round but i was too lazy and ended up not doing it. she wore her clothes and we slept together (we've slept together like three times). the following morning, after disturbing her sleep lol we did it again but i didn't last very long again. i was angry with myself but i knew it was a mental thing and also because i didn't have much experience. i knew if i was on campus with her taking classes and seeing her frequently the sex would be much better because there would be room for improvement and learning since we'd do it multiple times. but just doing it once in while places more importance on the sex and for me to deliver. i was honestly inexperienced and still insecure about my dick. we did it raw the two times i had sex with her too (thought i'd mention that). when i was leaving i asked if we'd still have more sex cos i remember the last time when she said we wouldn't but we ended up doing it again. she said yes.

another thing concerning the sex was that she liked me fingering her and she stops me multiple times when i do it because she says she doesn't want to squirt and mess the sheets. she also told me she likes rough sex and being submissive, dirty talk and all that. she even calls me daddy when we have sex but because i'm inexperienced and was a virgin before i met her it's not easy to do all that. i treat her gently and give her the girlfriend treatment but i think it's the nice guy in me. it was hard for me to treat her roughly but now i realize my mistakes. i remember telling her that at first i thought she was innocent but she laughed and said no. i also told her i liked bdsm and there's a chance that i would do it when next we Bleep.

Now, the point of this post is that she is dating my best friend now. i don't know how to feel. he knew every single thing about me and her but he still made a move. he's said he wanted to hit her but i didn't expect them to be dating. i know all this is happening because i wasn't in school so i barely even knows what goes on. to be fair, i didn't tell my best friend i liked her but even if he shouldn't have gone behind my back to date her. i don't even know how long he's been planning this behind my back and he didn't even tell me they were dating. usually if it was any other girl i would know but he kept quiet about this one and stopped talking to me much.

i noticed something was off but i didn't know this was the reason. and also her, i remember when she used to tell me when my best friend would hit on her but she told me she was never interested. there was even a time when she asked me if she should accept his invite to watch a movie in his apartment and i said no. but at the end of the day, we weren't dating so she's free to do whatever but it still hurts. she didn't know that he (my bf) knew about us having sex but the guy knew and still went to Bleep her and cuff her. This is soemone that used to advice me on how to move to her and all that. No, it hurts like hell. I used to consider this guy my blood and i trust him becuase since i'm not in school he's with my ps5 and tv. that's how much i trust him. we tell each other everything (him more than me tbh) but i can't believe he would do this. i haven't even talked to him about it and i don't know if i should. i asked him and he said they are dating but he never goes into detail.

another sad thing is that i can't come to school this semester as well becuase i have unpaid fees but they would be paid before next session in september. so, it makes sense if she's fucking someone else especially since i'm not around in school. I'm in the UK with my family now and I have to stay for about four/five months before going back to the US in the summer but it's like hell because that's all i think about. and since i'm with my parents and can't really talk to other girls i can't move on. i'm stuck with these thoughts.

like why did she have to date my best friend (she knew we were close), it would have been any one else and i wouldn't have cared as much and the guy is a snake because he knew about all my movements with the girl and still did this. he knew my intimate details about the sex with her and still made a move. when i told the girl about how he knew we were fucking, she said it was her fault for going for best friends and she was ass. Basically, she's sticking with him. I wish I was in school because this wouldn't have happened. It's all because I'm not in school but I'll be back in a few months.

At this point, i need advice on multiple things:

1. I'm tired of being a nice guy and insecure. I want to be more confident and improve my frame. Some girls i've messed with in the past say I'm too emotional and can't be a fuckbody because I attach emotions to it. This blasian girl said something similar, she said i was a loverboy. She's also told me to be more confident, stop second guessing myself and when we text, and i get pissed or something she says i act like a girl.

I need to stop being this nice guy. How do I erase it from the fabric of my soul because I've struggled with it for years and it has hindered me multiple times. That's also why I couldn't Bleep her the way she wanted even after she told me.

2. How do I improve my sex game? Genuinely like how to Bleep (do we use the waist/hips to control thrusts or it's the full body) properly. How do I last longer and get better erections ( I know this is cliche but i need something that works for you), how do i stop being insecure about my dick size (already told you measurements earlier)? But, if i bleeped her three times, that means it should be fine. I want to get good sex game so when i Bleep a girl she would always want me back.

3. How do I handle this situation? She was asking me how to make me feel better and asking if i was mad when she told me she was dating him. at first i thought it was a joke but they are serious but not too many people know about it. i messed up yesterday and let my emotions get a hold of me and i blocked her. but i unblocked her and she started acting angry to me and cold but i apologized. i've been acting needy though and doing too much and she complained today so I said i'll back off. if she doesn't text me first, i'll talk to her when i get back to the US in a few months. I'll still see my best friend (or ex best-friend) when I come back because we have the same friend groups and I can't avoid him.

4. How do I remedy this situation and still Bleep her again? I know it sounds stupid but my mind is made up. She's my first and she was actually good and I enjoy spending time with her when we Bleep. i don't necessarily want to date her but at least I still want to hit that. Also, it's a matter of pride to me because if they're still dating when i come back and i can Bleep her while she's dating some of my hurt will reduce. Also, i know i'm attached to her but I also want to right my wrongs and give her mind blowing sex to redeem myself and my sanity. How do I remedy the situation and still keep her on the cards? To be honest, even if you say not to try to Bleep her my mind is made up. I have to try at least, so please advice me accordingly.

5. How do I stop being emotional and acting like a girl. I react to things too much, take things personally and I'm insecure.

6. How can I keep myself sane and stop thinking about it? It's hurting my soul and staying here for months basically doing nothing is going to be torture for me?

7. Give me some general advice about game? How do I improve and go on from here.

Please I need comprehensive responses, I don't need a band aid on my wound but a full body surgery. I want to change this few months I'm here before I go back.

Thank you again for reading and forgive the errors and improper structure. I've been writing straight for two hours.

millie0:
cc pukkalolo and others, please come to my aid

millie0:
Long Post Alert;

Please pardon the multiple grammatical errors and disorganization, i wrote this with difficulty in my heart. Please read it and advice me.
Hello everybody. Happy New Year.

I'm in a dilemma and I need help. I have been feeling down and almost depressed for the past few days.

There's this girl that I met in school last semester. I go to a university in the US. So, I met her in like September. It was a school event and someone introduced us together. She's mixed, Nigerian and Asian (blasian). She's also relatively tall and she's older than me. She'll be 22 this year and I just turned 19 a few days ago. but i told her i was 21 as well She's also noticeably taller than me. She was a first year student and I'm in a higher year (or should be).

When I met her, we just introduced ourselves and talked for a few minutes. I told her I was 18 then when she told me my age but she kinda forgot down the line. But basically I saw she was kind of attractive but I was not really interested. I didn't even try to get her socials or anything.

A week or two later, I was on campus and came to the residence dorms because I was bored. It was night and I lived in apartment off campus. I met her in the lobby of a building and she was leaving to go to her room. This was around midnight or past midnight. I decided to go to her room with her but I didn't ask directly. I just told her to use her keys to open the common lounge for me so we walked to her part of the residence and she opened the lounge. Some people were inside and I was like there's too many people. So we came out and I found myself walking to her building. We got in and she took me to her room, offered me drinks of my choice ( I picked shots of vodka), and we both took shots while we chatted. I didn't want to make a move because I was nervous and it was the first time. I left to my apartment later. But I got her snap here.

wasn't special and i didn't do a fantastic job. i even couldn't come but i think she liked it because when we talked the following morning she said she enjoyed it.

but before i left, she told me we have to stop having sex and all that because she wanted to focus on another guy (he's taller and has beards and she likes beards, i don't have beards). she did tell me when we first kissed that she kissed another guy and that was him. i was surprised but i just assumed that maybe the sex wasn't good enough. i didn't tell her i was a virgin and i told her my body count was like 4.

When she said that to me, i was like okay. i told her my real age was 18 and she said she felt like i liked her and she didn't want to lead me on. she was interested in someone else. she was surprised about my real age but she said it was fine that her best friend that was the same age had a boyfriend who was 19 too.

i left and went back to the other city. we were still talking on imessage and facetime. and i discovered that things didn't go too well with the other guy because she kept telling me she was single and nothing happened.

IAmHim1:
people dont change with time. they do so with basic understanding of themselves. the basic understanding of themselves is then wrapped in time. thats why you hear phrases like "time heals" NOPE TIME DOESNT HEAL. if not all politicians @ 40yrs would have been veerry wise

Being a man isnt the addition of more man-like qualities. lolzzz do this and do that. NOPE!

being a man means FIRST severing ties that makes you a woman
see it this way: Being cold isnt the addition of adding more cold BUT BY REDUCING THE HEAT. stop what hurts you first. i keep singing this like an anthem. even wrote something about it. titled 'The equation to Happiness'

what are the qualities that makes a man a woman you might ask
look around you observe women what are they known for
complaining, inability to lead, shyness(cant maintain eye contact), ask for permission for being women, easily agreeable, etcetera etcetera. Observe all the traits you see in women that makes you act like woman AND WORK ON ENDING THOSE TRAITS IN YOURSELF FIRST!!!!


as for the sex, work on the food you eat. what gives erections is blood flowing through blood vessels properly. If at any point in time this blood flow is affected due blockages in blood vessels, then youre left with premature ejaculation and inability to maintain erections. heart pumps blood BUT the blood must have free flow to the penis else youll be having stop and start which cause weak erections and quick ejaculation problems

see sex like a swimming pool. when you go swimming, you dont immediately jump into the pool. nope. you gotta feel the water first with your legs thats why you see girls hanging around the edge of the swimming pools first before they swim. NOPE testing the temperature of the water doesnt make you a girl. YOU THINKING OTHER PEOPLE WILL THINK YOURE A GIRL IF YOURE TESTING THE POOL WITH BOTH LEGS MAKES YOU A GIRL!!

the penis is sensitive especially the cap. mostly sensitive to temperature. the pussy is most times warm n moist. so you see. THE PENIS IS MOSTLY OUTSIDE THE BODY. sometimes the penis is cold other times its neutral. now introducing the a cold/neutral SENSITIVE penis inside a warm vagina without making the penis adapt to the warm vagina is the reason why most men dont last Apart from poor diet issues of course



when you get inside a woman, make your penis adapt to the temperature of her vagina for some few minutes first before you start stroking if not you may not last that long.
thats why you see stores selling cream to help men last longer. this cream takes away the sensitivity in the penis cap making men last longer in bed
so GOOD DIET (cut away refined sugar, soft/hard drinks, butter) etc. try eat natural. + making the penis adapt in vagina first

refined sugar, coke, chelsea, heineken, guilder...theyre all bullshit. the reason they tell diabetic patient to not eat much carbohydrates is because the end product of carbohydrate is sugar. so you see. the end product of carbohydrates is still sugar so why d fvck will you be drinking garri(sugar) and still using sugar again. lolzzzzz

i hear people still saying "ill just use a lil sugar make e sweet" or " its just one bottle of alcohol per week. it shouldnt hurt"
lolzzz. for those reading this, if its addiction, i have been there too. im out now and i managed to write how i got out of my addiction "The One Guide to ending your addiction"
one core tenet of redpill is discipline. if you dont have control over yourself, others( people and things) will easily have control over you. its more of an aura thing

sex styles are also important. theres a relationship between gravity and erection. thats why styles like missionary most men dont last long while other styles like cowgirl and reverse cowgirl makes men last long. its all on the angle at which the penis enters the vagina AND STAYS so youd be wise to check out sex styles that can make you last long not necessarily the ones youre comfortable with


work on your mindset. it seems easy typing this on the yellow chair im sitting on right now but it pays. Ill reveal something to you right now that will change everything for you

you wanna fvck a girl that chosed you friend over you so you can regain your lost masculinity right. you come online looking for advice on how to Bleep this girl really good so she can realise the captivating penis she wasnt so patient with and almost missed.
its all cool. we all think we got something to prove but by doing that youre reinforcing the image placed on you

by fvcking her, youll be reinforcing her image of a cold heartless bitch you placed on her.

HOW!

In your mind youll be thinking "yeah, this girl made me a better man. ive fVcked her and she seems happy. now shell know who's the boss"

BUT IN HER MIND, SHES FEELING "so all i had to do to make millie0 a better man in bed and in life general WAS TO SLEEP WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. lolzzz. so the next time i want millie0 to perform better in bed and fvck me senseless, ALL I HAVE TO DO IS FVCK ANOTHER OF HIS FRIEND AND PURPOSELY MAKE HIM FIND OUT. and if i want the best of the best sex from millie0, i have to fvck 3 of his friends at a time and make him find out about the affair. ill make him think he has something to prove to me while enjoying myself in the process"

now that up there is the difference between emotional thinking and logical thinking. women are emotional, men are logical

and women chase relationships. it gives them an opportunity to form a bond with that stranger that makes their pvssy dripp.
if you as a man start chasing relationship, it robs women of the opportunity to form a bond with you. focus on your purpose.
YOUR PURPOSE HAS TO BE HIGHER THAN YOURSELF. if you make a woman your purpose, what then happens when such a woman dies. you crave to remain purposeless huh

your friend has taught you a lesson? and what did you pay him with. you lent him your play station n chillz lolzzzz
hating your friend would be the most stoopid thing to ever do to yourself. learn your lesson and dont try to repeat it another person. you know how you felt when someone did it to you unno

the girl doesnt respect you.
when man and woman have sex, the man disrespect the pussy and the womans body in general while the woman RESPECTS THE MAN DISRESPECTING HER PUSSY AND HER BODY IN GENERAL. its the madonna LovePeddler complex thingy. the madonna is respected but isnt fvcked well while the LovePeddler is disrespected and is fvched the way she craves.

what am i saying.
respect is looking up while Disrespect is looking down

to fvck a girl in a mind blowing way, you have to see her in a disrespectful way. men claim they hate prostitute but when they fvck prostitutes, they swalllow truck loads of tramadol to get erect and teach that nasty prostitute a lesson. lolzzzz while their respected wives at home is denied a proper sexxing.

for a girl to want to be fvcked in a disrespectful way by you, SHE HAS TO RESPECT YOU.

hope you see it clearly now millie0

PureFace1:
Read the ten commandments


https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/the-ten-commandments.56631/

Philosopher1979:
This thread IS VERY VERY IMPORTANT
because it explains inter gender relations, human nature and sexuality
which are some of the basics of humanity.
I learn many things from this thread.
Every one needs to know how to relate with the opposite gender.
Pastors even need it as we need to understand why women are attracted to religious figures
and how pastors can run away from this temptation.
Even women (who may criticize the thread) need it because it explains their nature and pathologies to them.
By the way UBUNJA writings are VERY VERY IMPORTANT. They are not misogynistic as some people may
claim but shows both genders for what they are. It explains so many things to me and i learnt a lot.
THIS THREAD IS HERE TO STAY.
I once told a female friend of mine about the ideas in this thread and she said it is true.
It takes a radical feminist or extremist to take down this thread

Wotowotoman:
Now tell me this is not one of the blogs that these idiots that claim to be successful with women get their contents from.

PureFace1:
It is not a blog but an international forum for men

Wotowotoman:
It is a PUA site. It has been around for several years..

Wotowotoman:
It is a PUA site. It has been around for several years..

millie0:
Beautiful advice. Thanks boss.

What you've said is true. I'll just let things go beside we are all in the same friend group and when I come back during the summer we'll all see each other again. So no point beefing anyone.

Lol, no I never planned on marrying or even dating her to be honest. I just felt emotional because my guy moved in and started dating her without letting me know. Did it behind my back. She was into me at first, made the first move and everything but I guess my lack of masculinity drew her away.

Can you elaborate on this sentence: Love is war and in order to excel you have to learn the extremes of love and hate, then create your balance in order to win.

I'll be in the UK until summer. I'll leave back to school by June or May. I'm down to have fun for a bit besides I'm not doing much. I stay in Reading at the moment, so you can link me up with your guy.

Thanks in general bro. I'll fix up and learn.

I also have this that's bugging me right now. Any advice?:

I know I'm not mature when it comes to my emotions. I get emotional easily and let it overwhelm me most times. A lot of women (even this one) I've been with have told me I'm emotional and act girly sometimes. It's the one thing I wish I could change in my life, I keep trying but it's hard because that's how I've always been. And I think my mum is more dominant than my father so it probably affected me somehow growing up. How do I stop being overly emotional, how can I control my emotions? I also lack masculine energy and self awareness. I want to be a confident man who is aware of himself and not impulsive. I want to stop being a nice guy.

IAmHim1:
people dont change with time. they do so with basic understanding of themselves. the basic understanding of themselves is then wrapped in time. thats why you hear phrases like "time heals" NOPE TIME DOESNT HEAL. if not all politicians @ 40yrs would have been veerry wise

Being a man isnt the addition of more man-like qualities. lolzzz do this and do that. NOPE!

being a man means FIRST severing ties that makes you a woman
see it this way: Being cold isnt the addition of adding more cold BUT BY REDUCING THE HEAT. stop what hurts you first. i keep singing this like an anthem. even wrote something about it. titled 'The equation to Happiness'

what are the qualities that makes a man a woman you might ask
look around you observe women what are they known for
complaining, inability to lead, shyness(cant maintain eye contact), ask for permission for being women, easily agreeable, etcetera etcetera. Observe all the traits you see in women that makes you act like woman AND WORK ON ENDING THOSE TRAITS IN YOURSELF FIRST!!!!


as for the sex, work on the food you eat. what gives erections is blood flowing through blood vessels properly. If at any point in time this blood flow is affected due blockages in blood vessels, then youre left with premature ejaculation and inability to maintain erections. heart pumps blood BUT the blood must have free flow to the penis else youll be having stop and start which cause weak erections and quick ejaculation problems

see sex like a swimming pool. when you go swimming, you dont immediately jump into the pool. nope. you gotta feel the water first with your legs thats why you see girls hanging around the edge of the swimming pools first before they swim. NOPE testing the temperature of the water doesnt make you a girl. YOU THINKING OTHER PEOPLE WILL THINK YOURE A GIRL IF YOURE TESTING THE POOL WITH BOTH LEGS MAKES YOU A GIRL!!

the penis is sensitive especially the cap. mostly sensitive to temperature. the pussy is most times warm n moist. so you see. THE PENIS IS MOSTLY OUTSIDE THE BODY. sometimes the penis is cold other times its neutral. now introducing the a cold/neutral SENSITIVE penis inside a warm vagina without making the penis adapt to the warm vagina is the reason why most men dont last Apart from poor diet issues of course



when you get inside a woman, make your penis adapt to the temperature of her vagina for some few minutes first before you start stroking if not you may not last that long.
thats why you see stores selling cream to help men last longer. this cream takes away the sensitivity in the penis cap making men last longer in bed
so GOOD DIET (cut away refined sugar, soft/hard drinks, butter) etc. try eat natural. + making the penis adapt in vagina first

refined sugar, coke, chelsea, heineken, guilder...theyre all bullshit. the reason they tell diabetic patient to not eat much carbohydrates is because the end product of carbohydrate is sugar. so you see. the end product of carbohydrates is still sugar so why d fvck will you be drinking garri(sugar) and still using sugar again. lolzzzzz

i hear people still saying "ill just use a lil sugar make e sweet" or " its just one bottle of alcohol per week. it shouldnt hurt"
lolzzz. for those reading this, if its addiction, i have been there too. im out now and i managed to write how i got out of my addiction "The One Guide to ending your addiction"
one core tenet of redpill is discipline. if you dont have control over yourself, others( people and things) will easily have control over you. its more of an aura thing

sex styles are also important. theres a relationship between gravity and erection. thats why styles like missionary most men dont last long while other styles like cowgirl and reverse cowgirl makes men last long. its all on the angle at which the penis enters the vagina AND STAYS so youd be wise to check out sex styles that can make you last long not necessarily the ones youre comfortable with


work on your mindset. it seems easy typing this on the yellow chair im sitting on right now but it pays. Ill reveal something to you right now that will change everything for you

you wanna fvck a girl that chosed you friend over you so you can regain your lost masculinity right. you come online looking for advice on how to Bleep this girl really good so she can realise the captivating penis she wasnt so patient with and almost missed.
its all cool. we all think we got something to prove but by doing that youre reinforcing the image placed on you

by fvcking her, youll be reinforcing her image of a cold heartless bitch you placed on her.

HOW!

In your mind youll be thinking "yeah, this girl made me a better man. ive fVcked her and she seems happy. now shell know who's the boss"

BUT IN HER MIND, SHES FEELING "so all i had to do to make millie0 a better man in bed and in life general WAS TO SLEEP WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. lolzzz. so the next time i want millie0 to perform better in bed and fvck me senseless, ALL I HAVE TO DO IS FVCK ANOTHER OF HIS FRIEND AND PURPOSELY MAKE HIM FIND OUT. and if i want the best of the best sex from millie0, i have to fvck 3 of his friends at a time and make him find out about the affair. ill make him think he has something to prove to me while enjoying myself in the process"

now that up there is the difference between emotional thinking and logical thinking. women are emotional, men are logical

and women chase relationships. it gives them an opportunity to form a bond with that stranger that makes their pvssy dripp.
if you as a man start chasing relationship, it robs women of the opportunity to form a bond with you. focus on your purpose.
YOUR PURPOSE HAS TO BE HIGHER THAN YOURSELF. if you make a woman your purpose, what then happens when such a woman dies. you crave to remain purposeless huh

your friend has taught you a lesson? and what did you pay him with. you lent him your play station n chillz lolzzzz
hating your friend would be the most stoopid thing to ever do to yourself. learn your lesson and dont try to repeat it another person. you know how you felt when someone did it to you unno

the girl doesnt respect you.
when man and woman have sex, the man disrespect the pussy and the womans body in general while the woman RESPECTS THE MAN DISRESPECTING HER PUSSY AND HER BODY IN GENERAL. its the madonna LovePeddler complex thingy. the madonna is respected but isnt fvcked well while the LovePeddler is disrespected and is fvched the way she craves.

what am i saying.
respect is looking up while Disrespect is looking down

to fvck a girl in a mind blowing way, you have to see her in a disrespectful way. men claim they hate prostitute but when they fvck prostitutes, they swalllow truck loads of tramadol to get erect and teach that nasty prostitute a lesson. lolzzzz while their respected wives at home is denied a proper sexxing.

for a girl to want to be fvcked in a disrespectful way by you, SHE HAS TO RESPECT YOU.

hope you see it clearly now millie0

millie0:
Beautiful advice. Thanks boss.

What you've said is true. I'll just let things go beside we are all in the same friend group and when I come back during the summer we'll all see each other again. So no point beefing anyone.

Lol, no I never planned on marrying or even dating her to be honest. I just felt emotional because my guy moved in and started dating her without letting me know. Did it behind my back. She was into me at first, made the first move and everything but I guess my lack of masculinity drew her away.

Can you elaborate on this sentence: Love is war and in order to excel you have to learn the extremes of love and hate, then create your balance in order to win.

I'll be in the UK until summer. I'll leave back to school by June or May. I'm down to have fun for a bit besides I'm not doing much. I stay in Reading at the moment, so you can link me up with your guy.

Thanks in general bro. I'll fix up and learn.

I also have this that's bugging me right now. Any advice?:

I know I'm not mature when it comes to my emotions. I get emotional easily and let it overwhelm me most times. A lot of women (even this one) I've been with have told me I'm emotional and act girly sometimes. It's the one thing I wish I could change in my life, I keep trying but it's hard because that's how I've always been. And I think my mum is more dominant than my father so it probably affected me somehow growing up. How do I stop being overly emotional, how can I control my emotions? I also lack masculine energy and self awareness. I want to be a confident man who is aware of himself and not impulsive. I want to stop being a nice guy.

DieRich5:
Happy new year red fam


Yesterday 2nd, I saw my girlfriend with another boy going out and dem pass my street nd I was just going out to meet my aunt, luckily I came back cus light just come so I need to drop my fone at home, on my way home, I saw dem Nd I was shock Nd she greeted me, I didn't answer, I just pass dem...

The thing pain me, I'm not calling her and I'll just break up with her if she call me

I don't know why I'm sad Nd funny thing I've had sex with more than 6 girl in this our 1 yr+ relationship

Wotowotoman:
Guy I am here to advise you again to run away from anyone that says he wants to meet you or that he wants to introduce you to anyone.
You must be a big bollo if you think say people wey dey here are your friends.

That idiot asking you to meet his friend is a fukking hustler that sells stolen phones. Check his posts. Wetin those kind people wan contribute to your life? Dem don hear say Mugu dey UK and yankee, and you think say they have your best interest at heart? If you still dey feel say na your paddy be that then you must be a real bollo.

adambeatz:
You see this is my problem with ignorance, because you can't do it equals no one else should do it. The same you who insulted him whrn he needed advice is now dishing out half baked advice. I know you have a poverty mentality and as such a bitter human being, I've graduated from selling gadgets to owing my own company, id have dropped my company nairaland account name for you to see but honestly, your not worth rubbing minds with.

All you see is poverty all I see is opportunity, you are not on my level boy, i ship gemstones and mineral ores even to UK for other Nigerians there to sell and make money, I can understand poverty has eaten deep into your soul that you can never be happy for yourself or anyone but it's okay I guess, we all have our paths to go. When I said don't let Nigeria happen to you, you happen to be a living example, so broken you can't bring up arguments to counter what I said, for the fact you took your time to go through my post when I don't even know you exists is a Testament to the kind of sound that resides within you, broken and bitter because Nigeria has happened to you,lolz

One Love

Wotowotoman:
Trust me. You don’t want to go there with me. You hungry hustler wey dey find mugu to chop say he be business man. Selling stolen phones na business? Tueh!