How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now - Romance - Nairaland
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| How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Pukkalolo(op): 4:49pm On Feb 09, 2024 |
In order to taste my cup of water you must first empty your cup. Meaning, before you read this post, you need first abandoned everything you think you know about porn/masturbation addiction, and read with an open mind.... because I gathered my wisdom from raw personal experience, not some research scientific bullshit. Mahatma Gandhi once said, "An ounce of practice is worth more than tons of preaching.” And Paul Coelho also said, "The world is changed by your example not your opinion." I try my best to live by example; meaning, before I give advice, I first make sure I have "live" that advice. I quit porn and masturbation over five years ago... This February makes it 6 years... and I never looked back... How? Well, keep reading... This is a bit long post , so I'm gonna divide it into different part. Let's begin quickly... When it comes to quiting masturbation, you know exactly what to do because the knowledge on what to do is scattered everywhere on the internet. Just go to Google and type "how to quit porn or masturbation" you'll see thousands of search results. But despite the battalions of knowledge available to quit masturbation, you still find it difficult to quit. Why? This is because the question isn't really "how to quit fapping" The real question is "why can't I quit fapping?" Bill Walsh said, “If your why is strong enough you will figure out how!” First of all... You need understand how your mind work.. We have two minds: The subconscious mind and the conscious mind. Subconscious mind is more concern with your raw desire, and emotional impulse and habits. Have someone ever piss you off so bad that you were so tempted to punch him in the face or curse him out? That's the subconscious mind (emotional impulse) wanting to punch him in the face or curse him out. As a man, have you walked past a sexy beautiful woman and you are tempted to turn your head to look at a hot ass; that's your subconscious mind (raw desire) wanting to look at her ass. The subconscious mind has the knowledge of pleasure and pain, satisfaction and frustration, excitement or boredom. The subconscious mind always tries as much as possible to avoid an activity that it perceive is going to be painful. And If the subconscious mind perceives an activity to be pleasurable, then it will keep urging you to engage in it over and over again... The subconscious mind will urge you to repeat something, as long as it perceive that thing to be pleasurable. Your porn/masturbation addiction is mostly in your subconscious mind. But after you masturbate, you tend to feel guilt, sad, shame and dejected.... Why? Just like Lil' Wayne lyrics, “It's like when I cum, I come to my senses.” Or better say, "when I cum, I come to my conscious mind" This is because when you come back to your "conscious" mind, it's scolds you immediately. It's tells you that what you just did is bad, dirty and shameful. Your conscious mind is more concern with your ego, moral ethics and social conditioning. This is your analytical and reasoning mind. The conscious mind has the knowledge of good and evil, right and wrong, ethical and unethical, healthy and unhealthy and so on. The conscious mind tries as much as possible to avoid an activity it perceives to be dirty, unethical, wrong, unhealthy.. If the conscious mind perceives an activity to be good, ethical, healthy, uplifting then its going to be drawn towards the activity. Your conscious mind don't want you to masturbate. But your subconscious mind wants you to masturbate. There's an internal battle going on in your head between your two mind. Conscious mind: "masturbation hinder you from developing intimate real romantic relationships with real females." Subconscious mind: "It's better to masturbate than waste time and money trying to sex on all these STD infected females out there." Conscious mind: "It sucks your energy and makes you feel weak, tired and sluggish." Subconscious mind: "It gives you great pleasure and it helps relax your brain." Conscious mind: "Please don't masturbate, it's shameful." Subconscious mind: "Shameful as how? Just do it bro, you are gonna enjoy the experience." The internal debate continues.... This is why you feel that tension when you about to relapse and masturbate. The conscious mind is more logical and long-term focused. But the subconscious mind is totally emotional like a little kid and seek instant gratification. And your subconscious mind is always stronger than your conscious mind that's when you get the urge to masturbate, you find it difficult to resist it. Basically, you are not struggling with mastubation. Masturbation is on it own. The struggle is between your conscious mind and subconscious mind. So how do I trick myself to never masturbate despite all the urges ![]() Is it by applying self-discipline? Well, the answer is NO... Typing.... |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by nicho450(m): 5:35pm On Feb 09, 2024 |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Pukkalolo(op): 5:37pm On Feb 09, 2024 |
Our dominant cultural narrative is that quiting porn and fapping requires astounding levels of willpower, and a massive monk mode self-discipline. But that's not the case. The truth is, relying on self-discipline or willpower to never jerk off is only a guarantee that you will keep jerking off. Here's why: Self-discipline is similar to the muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it becomes. But like any other muscle, if you apply self-discipline often without any rest, eventually you will fatigues and gas out; then you'll find yourself relapsing. I have feelings and mood swings. If I get triggered or I get the urge, my self-discipline might fail me. This is why I don't reply on my willpower or self-discipline to stay away from masturbation.. If you’re serious about quitting masturbation, then self-discipline won’t be enough. Infact, so-called self-discipline is what’s holding you back. Why? Remember, we said, Your porn/masturbation addiction is mostly in your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind is a powerful force that control your life. Everything thing you do on auto pilot without thinking is controlled by your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind making you masturbate is an extremely powerful force, so applying self-discipline to quit masturbation is like bring knife to a bomb and missile fight... It's no wonder that addicts who apply self-discipline might experience some freedom for a couple of days or weeks, and boast saying, "at last I have quit masturbation"...but sooner or later they fall into masturbation again. And they don't just fall weakly, they fall into it furiously, making up for the all masturbation sessions they missed. Self-discipline is for guys who are still uncertain if they truly want to quit porn As Michael Jordan said, “Once I made a decision, I never thought about it again" If you are still struggling with masturbation, then it's because you've not truly and whole heatedly make the decision to quit. If you require self-discipline, that means you haven’t fully determined that you want to quit. I truly believe that the secret to end any addiction is leveraging a system that doesn’t rely on self-discipline. For this happen, your lifestyle in your fapping days must be different from your lifestyle on NoFap days. The problem isn't that you can't quit porn/masturbation addiction, the problem is that you are also addicted to a lot of other behaviors that contradict your goal of quiting porn/masturbation. Typing... |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Pukkalolo(op): 6:11pm On Feb 09, 2024 |
In 1519, Hernán Cortés, a Spanish conquistador, set sail with a fleet of 11 ships and approximately 600 men to conquer the Aztec empire. When they arrived Mexico, Cortés could see that his own troops were scared of the battle ahead. Seeing the fear, doubt and hesitation among his men, he decided to put them in psychological situation where there was no choice of going back. Cortés boldly ordered the burning of the ships. This act left his crew with only one option – to move forward and fight for victory, as going back was no longer possible. They rather win or dying trying. THEY WON! At its core, "burn the boats" is a metaphor for commitment, relentless, and dedication towards a goal... If you have to make a choice between fapping or not fapping, you naturally tend to slide towards the choice of fapping... The reason why Cortés and his men won was because the choice of going back was no longer possible. The reason why you find it difficult to quit masturbating is because you still have the CHOICE to masturbate. The secret is to put yourself in the situation where you don't have the choice to masturbate. Ask yourself "what situation can I put myself that naturally prevent me from masturbating because I DON'T HAVE THE CHOICE?" The goal is to ELIMINATE THE CHOICE to masturbate. Here's an extreme hardcore example: Back then when I still used to live with my big bro(cousin), I showed him my long-term goals, then I told him masturbation might prevent me from achieving those goals, so I needed quit masturbation by all means. Then I took out a few thousand bucks and gave it to him. He was like "what's this cash for?" I replied, "Always look out for me; if you ever catch me watching porn or fapping, keep the money for yourself." The process was kinda like this: If I don't fap after a month, he'll return the money back to me, but I'll tip him a little out of the money. Then the next month again, we'll begin the process again. My big bro was excited about the idea not necessarily because he gives a shit about me quiting masturbation, but rather because he wanted to keep the money for himself; so he brutally secretly monitored me when I'm alone because he was hoping to catch me masturbating or viewing porn. That felt totally crazy, but the crazier thing about it was that it worked. In that situation I don't have the choice: I made sure I never masturbate or view porn, or else I lose my money. Despite the urge and temptations around me I could not fap because I DON'T HAVE THE CHOICE: I needed my money back. Like I said that's an extremely hardcore example of a situation of having no choice. But you don't have to put yourself in that extreme hard situation. I know many other softer situations you can put yourself in. But the idea remains the same: simply look for those situation where masturbating is totally impossible because you don't have the choice. The trick is to design a daily lifestyle that leaves you "no choice" but to “adapt” into your new lifestyle of not masturbate. We’ll look at some ways to achieve that Typing.... |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by KingEarnest(m): 8:42pm On Feb 09, 2024 |
Nice post boss. Learnt something new. |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by RaySimran: 9:11pm On Feb 09, 2024 |
You, a genius bro. |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Pussyisgud: 9:33pm On Feb 09, 2024 |
I decided to quit masturbation because i discovered that it leads me to brothel to girls who could have herpes and if i can make it a habit not to masturbate with time it will stick and be permanent. Just the thought of herpes alone is enough to make me stay away from masturbation. |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Goodmarlian: 10:08pm On Feb 09, 2024 |
Pussyisgud:i dont get this comment. |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by ObalendeCMS: 1:17am On Feb 10, 2024 |
Nice one, bro! Keep it up!! |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Badbunny: 7:29am On Feb 10, 2024 |
Oh no! Not me masturbating while reading this long ass thread ![]() |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Shaneroberts: 7:42am On Feb 10, 2024 |
. |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Collins4u1(m): 8:37am On Feb 10, 2024 |
nice, following. |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by WantsandMore: 8:44am On Feb 10, 2024 |
Badbunny:that's disgusting ![]() |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by IAmHim1: 9:25am On Feb 10, 2024*. Modified: 4:22am On Jan 01, 2025 |
" |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Badbunny: 9:31am On Feb 10, 2024 |
WantsandMore:😝🤪 |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by BBIA: 9:41am On Feb 10, 2024 |
Pussyisgud:try marry |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by okunwaye(m): 9:50am On Feb 10, 2024 |
start having regular sex will reduce your urge for masturbating |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by 247man: 9:57am On Feb 10, 2024 |
All these on top wanking? It is well |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by DestinedForGrea: 10:06am On Feb 10, 2024 |
okunwaye:You have to understand that masturbation is not the main problem here. The problem is uncontrollable sexual urges. Regular sex will not help at all, in fact it'll worsen the situation. Of course, masturbation is a no-no. |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by okunwaye(m): 10:12am On Feb 10, 2024*. Modified: 4:06pm On Jun 25, 2025 |
DestinedForGrea:Start having sex regularly to relief you of your sextual urges, Any other method apart from this is B.S. |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by DestinedForGrea: 10:14am On Feb 10, 2024 |
okunwaye:And how will that help you learn to control yourself? Na until you go rape person naim you go know say you need to tame your sexual urges? |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by okunwaye(m): 10:17am On Feb 10, 2024 |
DestinedForGrea:ok cut off your preek to tame your sextual urge :- ![]() |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by okunwaye(m): 10:19am On Feb 10, 2024 |
some of you forget its not only men that engage in masturbation ![]() |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by IAmHim1: 10:37am On Feb 10, 2024*. Modified: 5:48pm On Oct 16, 2024 |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by IAmHim1: 11:09am On Feb 10, 2024*. Modified: 4:22am On Jan 01, 2025 |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by IAmHim1: 11:11am On Feb 10, 2024*. Modified: 4:22am On Jan 01, 2025 |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by IAmHim1: 11:13am On Feb 10, 2024*. Modified: 4:22am On Jan 01, 2025 |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by PinkNature(m): 11:22am On Feb 10, 2024 |
@pukkalolo, you should book space before comments from us following the thread overcrowd the front page. |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by okunwaye(m): 12:18pm On Feb 10, 2024 |
IAmHim1:who is talking about porn? ![]() |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Ttipsy(f): 1:03pm On Feb 10, 2024 |
IAmHim1:interesting |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Pukkalolo(op): 2:15pm On Feb 10, 2024*. Modified: 4:16pm On Feb 10, 2024 |
Remember, I said the trick is to design a daily lifestyle that leaves you "no choice" but to “adapt” into your new lifestyle of not masturbating. The two key words there is "no choice" and "adapt" Couple of times, guys have met me, asking me ways to help them quit fap and porn In order to help solve their addiction problem, I simply try to understand their daily way of living, then I admister a "no choice" situations that they have to "adapt" to in order to quit masturbation. For example I had a dude who is schooling in a state uni told me he wanted to quit porn by all means. He said he was tired and frustrated with it. Enough is enough. He said “what should I do to put an end to my porn addiction once and for all by all means?” I replied, "have you make every effort to quit?" He said, “I have done everything in my power but every night I still find myself going on the internet and watching porn and fapping when I'm back from lectures...I have no control over this porn addiction. I fap every night.” I said, "well you've make every effort, but you've not try my 'no choice' solution." Then I asked about him his daily way of life and what he does through out the day, so I can give him a solution that ELIMINATE THE CHOICE to masturbate. While he was telling about his daily lifestyle, immediately, I spot the solution that will work out for him. I smiled and said, “ Every night before coming home, leave your browsing phone at your friend's home... Tell your friend you want to be leaving your phone with him every night because you don't want to be distracted or something." He looked at me in a confused manner. I continued, "try that for a two weeks and let me know the outcome.” His mood fell, he replied, "Nah bro, I can't do that." I said, "why so?" He said, "Without my browsing phone with me in the night, I'm going to feel bored." My response was, "you asked what should I do to put an end to my porn addiction once and for all by all means... but you are resisting the solution I'm giving...it's obvious you don't truly want to quit porn." He was like, "common bro, I truly want to quit." I told him, "Think about sleeping as recharging your battery mental energy level and making it go up to 100% level. When you wake up in the morning as your busy day goes on. That energy level start falling down to 70% 40% 20% and by the end of the day, you get 10%. When you come home at the end of the day, that's when you are weak, tired and stressed out and have less willpower and discipline to fight the urge to watch porn. In that situation, if you bring your browsing phone to the bedroom, you are putting yourself in a compromising situation because you could easily fall into the temptation of watching porn. There is a quote that says, don't hang out in a restaurant if you're trying to avoid food. By leaving your browsing gadgets at your friend's place and coming home without it, you've already "burn the ship" because there's no way you could have access to the internet to watch porn... You no longer have the choice to masturbate." Anyways... After much persuasion from me, he agreed to try the idea. A two weeks later, I asked him his experiences. He told me there's good news and bad news. He said, "The good news is that the idea worked like magic; I haven't masturbate or view porn for the past two weeks... The other benefits is that I have more time to study my book at night and do other productive stuffs.... In just two weeks I could already see the positive changes in me. " I said, "then what's the bad news?" He continued, "the bad news is that I'm finding it difficult adapt to the new life style." My response was, "that's still actually a good news. You are used to being a loser. Your new lifestyle of being a winner isn't going to be comfortable or easy at first. Success isn't comfortable. But You will get used to it." Remember, I said your lifestyle when fapping must be totally different from your NoFap lifestyle or else you will relapse. They say, "if you can't convince them, you confuse them." Masturbation is like a being. The reason why mastubation can't leave you is because you're giving it the lifestyle that gives it a chance or the choice to operate. If you want to quit mastubation, then you have simply change few things about your daily lifestyle, so that when the spirit of masturbation come as usual, it going to be confused and go back... Most times, just a little few changes in your daily lifestyle can greatly decreased your odds of fapping. Let me give you another example: Last year November, A dude told me about his fapping addiction and he said I'm someone he respect very well and that he believes I can give give him a realistic advice on how to quit the addiction. Then I asked about him his daily way of life and what he does through out the day, so I can give him a solution that ELIMINATE THE CHOICE to masturbate. I told he should change or do just these two things in his daily lifestyle and mastubation will be over... What are the things? Here's what I told him Typing.... |
| Re: How I Tricked Myself To Never Masturbate Again For Over 5 Years Now by Pukkalolo(op): 4:05pm On Feb 10, 2024 |
IAmHim1:You are totally making sense bro |
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