₦airaland Forum

Fiscus105:
With story you narrated, it's obvious the woman fell for you at first sight and you urself playing* into her manipulation, all the story she is narrating after seeing you are just cock & bull story, giving dog bad names in other to hang it.

Just like someone accused you up thr, your story not consistent.
*How can wife of P A. to pastor locked her wife for going to church program?
*If it's happens, why can wife call pastor, his boss, but prefer to tell a total stranger.
*Wife that claims to be born again, but ready to open legs for total stranger without even stress her an inch.

Did wife tell you she's born again...Did you know the circumstances which they met themselves about a year ago before marriage?.. Does going to church imply that one is born again? This issue does question our impression about who is a born in church regardless if she's a worker or not.
.
Also know that they only married 7 months ago...courted even in lesser month..So obviously they don't know each other completely.
.
And if I tell you the name of the church u will probably not make this rushed conclusion

The OP is narrating the story as if he were with the woman in her house as a witness; he is strongly testifying without recourse to natural justice. His bias for the woman's side shows how emotionally attached he is to this said woman. N/B: In marital issues, you don't take hook, line, and sinker. When a woman narrates an issue to you, it's always laced with bias and errors. When I read where the OP called the husband a broke church dude, I gave up on the OP. He is already fantasizing about replacing the broke church dude." That's when I knew the OP may also be sugarcoating the side of the lady's story.

chiboycue:
If Joseph, the son of Jacob can resist the sexual advances and temptations of Potiphar's wife, then any determined pastor can resist the temptation of any married woman in marriage crisis irrespective of how emotional she is or how pumped up her bust or ass is.

He did not stand there and resist

HE RAN AWAY!

No be by gragra.

Samo and Davo with their gragra still fall

ExudeLoveToAll:
The OP is narrating the story as if he were with the woman in her house as a witness; he is strongly testifying without recourse to natural justice. His bias for the woman's side shows how emotionally attached he is to this said woman. N/B: In marital issues, you don't take hook, line, and sinker. When a woman narrates an issue to you, it's always laced with bias and errors. When I read where the OP called the husband a broke church dude, I gave up on the OP. He is already fantasizing about replacing the broke church dude." That's when I knew the OP may also be sugarcoating the side of the lady's story.

True

FreeSpirited:
Did wife tell you she's born again...Did you know the circumstances which they met themselves about a year ago before marriage?.. Does going to church imply that one is born again? This issue does question our impression about who is a born in church regardless if she's a worker or not.
.
Also know that they only married 7 months ago...courted even in lesser month..So obviously they don't know each other completely.
.
And if I tell you the name of the church u will probably not make this rushed conclusion

Because she didn't tell you she is born again, that's why she couldn't report her husband to his pastor who is a boss to his husband, when husband locked her outside, but prefer to tell all her marital story for a total stranger that she just met, few days ago.


From ur story, I took that out and related it to my point above. Your story not consistent.

tnerro1:
Be careful of woman that carry church on their heads to the detriment of their husbands or families, it doesn’t end well

I tell u Bros that how my own marriage ended almost 4yrs ago
Church is over rated when it comes to relationship
A marriage counselor is far better than getting advice in a church
But now ex wife is full of regrets wanting to come back
But for where over my dead body

Lol

This thread just dey funny me.. lol

Knacking... lol

Funny guy
The bobo wan knack somebody's daughter come dey talk stories

stickle:
Your choice of word, "naking" is nothing befitting an aspiring pastor

UrPapa:
Seems this op will soon fall or has already fallen sef
The way he even palash the “knack” word sef

Person wey go soon fall...

Even me wey no put any restrictions on what I permit my royal self to do when it comes to sex no fit fall for all those kind shakara...

We see this things from miles before they reach us and we already know our course of action before then... So everywhere tight.

People wey need someone to tell them right from wrong, how them no go fall yakata like walls of Jericho?

FreeSpirited:
..
It's like sometimes, a lot of men don't know what they are going into when they decide to give in to societal expectation that they must marry .
..
In this case
- The guys source of income isn't regular
- Guy is mean and unappreciative according to the lady cos she supports the home more often than not..
- Jealous and reactive
- poor communication and little gisting bond time...
.
I'm like why did u guys now marry each other

Oga wait till you hear the man's side of the story. Don't just conclude based on only one side you have heard.

MrOreo:
Oga go in to details na! What's with all this small small gist you're dropping??

🤣🤣🤣🤣

FreeSpirited:
You will never understand what it means to fall into grave sexual temptation until you start living a sexually pure life or until you decide to work for God.
.
I'm not yet a pastor in full time ministry but I can tell you the truth based on series of temptation I get these days, the work of a pastor is one of the hardest when it comes to standing against sexual temptation.
Yesterday I also perfectly understood why pastors fall for married women or ladies whose marriage or relationship is in crises during counseling.
.
The truth is counselling a heart broken woman is a big trap. A big trap that can only take God and courage to not fall into. You will be shocked that the person you are counseling is so vulnerable and sexually primed that the greatest emotions flowing through her at that time is a urge to be touched, cuddled, caressed and knacked. I saw everything last night, and my defence began to crack, wane, weakened and almost dissolved completely while the lady was begging time for me to touch her.
.
It was yesterday I realized that deciding to live a holy life or deciding to be a pastor means that you have only signed yourself into continuous sexual temptation. No wonder most pastors fail! I thought I had won the demon of temptation until I experienced the dimension of counseling a broken married lady.
.
I won't go into the story. It's a long crazy one. But pastors will understand what I'm saying .... And if you have not counselled a heartbroken woman either married or single... You can never understand. How I escaped without crashing totally is a mystery.

Am not advicing you pastors, I don't believe in your God....
But I want to say this generally to men, self discipline and control is very important in a man's life, if you have it you can't fall to any woman's advances....

If given the chance to cheat against her husband with you, she will gladly do it and tame it as a mistake...?

Women are natural cheats and liers, what you should do is to counsel her like you are counselling your fellow man, emotions and lust shouldn't be brought to the picture....

ExudeLoveToAll:
The OP is narrating the story as if he were with the woman in her house as a witness; he is strongly testifying without recourse to natural justice. His bias for the woman's side shows how emotionally attached he is to this said woman. N/B: In marital issues, you don't take hook, line, and sinker. When a woman narrates an issue to you, it's always laced with bias and errors. When I read where the OP called the husband a broke church dude, I gave up on the OP. He is already fantasizing about replacing the broke church dude." That's when I knew the OP may also be sugarcoating the side of the lady's story.

Is a fake story. Though something like this is happening.

FreeSpirited:
The man is also not honest about domestic matters and money according to her. And the lady finds out on a number of occasion. I also noticed another one.. When a relative called... Who narrated how hubby denied to have packed his belongings outside.. Whereas Lady was saying it was a lie

When I told her her man has the potential to be a good hubby being a Christian if she can exercise patients... She says Christian by mouth
.
And the lady finds

You need to learn to keep what is shared in a session private and not shared on social media. Keep it professional . Matters like this should be between you, them and God .

About the temptation , never do sessions without people being around . Have your secretary come in once in a while to show that there is someone else around . If she claims you took advantage of her in her vulnerable state, Wallahi you go explain tire behind bars.

Fiscus105:
Pastor or no pastor,.... people should endeavour to stay distance from opposite sex who is not husband/wife or boyfriend/girlfriend.

Two people who are still sexual active and who aren't blood related, cannot come closer without sexual emotion spring out.

More reason you shouldn't take anyone who insist on opposite bestie serious.

It is written in the holy bible 'flee' and not rebuking

chiboycue:
If Joseph, the son of Jacob can resist the sexual advances and temptations of Potiphar's wife, then any determined pastor can resist the temptation of any married woman in marriage crisis irrespective of how emotional she is or how pumped up her bust or ass is.

It's not as easy if u are one who was once promiscuous and used to taking advantage of women in the past while in the world. That instinct can kick in when you least expect after giving ur life to Christ.
That's why setting boundaries is a must.

FreeSpirited:
..
It's like sometimes, a lot of men don't know what they are going into when they decide to give in to societal expectation that they must marry .
..
In this case
- The guys source of income isn't regular
- Guy is mean and unappreciative according to the lady cos she supports the home more often than not..
- Jealous and reactive
- poor communication and little gisting bond time...
.
I'm like why did u guys now marry each other

At this point I can't understand how you are a counsellor, you just heard one part of the story from the woman and you believed her, knowing women are born liers, have you taken a time to ask the man that married her with his hard earned money, what really happened...?

FreeSpirited:
You will never understand what it means to fall into grave sexual temptation until you start living a sexually pure life or until you decide to work for God.
.
I'm not yet a pastor in full time ministry but I can tell you the truth based on series of temptation I get these days, the work of a pastor is one of the hardest when it comes to standing against sexual temptation.
Yesterday I also perfectly understood why pastors fall for married women or ladies whose marriage or relationship is in crises during counseling.
.
The truth is counselling a heart broken woman is a big trap. A big trap that can only take God and courage to not fall into. You will be shocked that the person you are counseling is so vulnerable and sexually primed that the greatest emotions flowing through her at that time is a urge to be touched, cuddled, caressed and knacked. I saw everything last night, and my defence began to crack, wane, weakened and almost dissolved completely while the lady was begging time for me to touch her.
.
It was yesterday I realized that deciding to live a holy life or deciding to be a pastor means that you have only signed yourself into continuous sexual temptation. No wonder most pastors fail! I thought I had won the demon of temptation until I experienced the dimension of counseling a broken married lady.
.
I won't go into the story. It's a long crazy one. But pastors will understand what I'm saying .... And if you have not counselled a heartbroken woman either married or single... You can never understand. How I escaped without crashing totally is a mystery.

Two simple but not easy ways to escape:
1. Fasting. Fasting helps you subdue the flesh and any Christian who is not fasting often (at least two days a week) will fall easily.
2. Counsel in an open space or have at least one person with you as assistant.

ExudeLoveToAll:
The OP is narrating the story as if he were with the woman in her house as a witness; he is strongly testifying without recourse to natural justice. His bias for the woman's side shows how emotionally attached he is to this said woman. N/B: In marital issues, you don't take hook, line, and sinker. When a woman narrates an issue to you, it's always laced with bias and errors. When I read where the OP called the husband a broke church dude, I gave up on the OP. He is already fantasizing about replacing the broke church dude." That's when I knew the OP may also be sugarcoating the side of the lady's story.

She actually spoke a lot about financial issue. And how she's been supportive and a lot.. I may have used a word you think betrays my intention. I honestly had no intent to take advantage of her.
..
I only narrated what she told me based on my questioning when she said she wanted to go back to being single...

Gbamsolutely lol

TheBreastSucker:
Next time you find yourself in such a situation just suck her breasts and move o because it is not considered as cheating

FreeSpirited:
I know for a fact... And it's not as if I'm stupid enough to discuss it with her neighbors or church members....
And don't we sometimes see pastors use knowledge from counselling to drive points home in some of their sermon without revealing the person?
Nairaland is anonymous..... That's why I left out a lot of details that can link the identity.

How do you think she will feel if she is reading this... Nairaland is not really that anonymous.

baralatie:
And i am not God to judge
What i am saying is the story is not true
It is true that infidelity happens even amongst some ministers I have seen Wella
But to say the wife is a worker in church and the husband is the pastors p.a and the husband is fighting the wife for going to church.tye story get k leg

You may be correct but.
What if he's fighting her because she sleeps with them pastors? For example according to the op, he once threw out her things.

Must be really frustrated picturing his wife giving out her thing to other pastors. And now she's after this pastor op. So even if you're a dj, you will not like your wife coming to the club if she's getting in with other men at the club.

I know girls who are really into religious men.

occfx:
How people get erection for married women is strange to me sha.

Married woman someone pounds every night with venom is what I will be aspiring for. I don't feel anything for married women at all. If you package without ring I may look at you and admire but immediately I found out you are married, I forget you instantly. A married ex ones sent me message one day say make I send her porrn video, I was like, which kind nonsense be that, talk to your husband abeg. She come dey beg oo, I shouted at her, she run. I will rather go for teenagers than any married woman, if you like naked.

married women Toto sweet pass single girls Toto.i no fit lie for u.and tradition no Dey anywhere.all those talk na wash.na mainly people wife I Dey fork

Fiscus105:
With story you narrated, it's obvious the woman fell for you at first sight and you urself playing* into her manipulation, all the story she is narrating after seeing you are just cock & bull story, giving dog bad names in other to hang it.

Just like someone accused you up thr, your story not consistent.
*How can wife of P A. to pastor locked her wife for going to church program?
*If it's happens, why can wife call pastor, his boss, but prefer to tell a total stranger.
*Wife that claims to be born again, but ready to open legs for total stranger without even stress her an inch.

I love your questions...why would the husband lock her outside? It may not be a cock and bull story, because if you are not in the institution called marriage, some truth(s) are stranger than fiction.

- Is the husband suspecting something about the wife?
- Wife claims to be born again, like you said, but "out of frustration", wants to open up her legs easily to a stranger.
- Women are highly manipulative and will pour everything on your head when the deed is done.
- They can paint the husband badly just to ensure they have what they want
- In their narratives, women are not accountable; only the other party does something wrong. Fall for that and you are the biggest fool!

I will attach something I saw when I remember this.

UrPapa:
Seems this op will soon fall or has already fallen sef
The way he even palash the “knack” word sef

If he hasn't done it yet, then it's only a matter of time.
Sexual temptation is not anybody's mate and this guy appears like he is romanticizing the idea.
If you're really serious...then stop putting yourself in that kind of vulnerable position otherwise you're just deceiving yourself boss.

FreeSpirited:
You will never understand what it means to fall into grave sexual temptation until you start living a sexually pure life or until you decide to work for God.
.
I'm not yet a pastor in full time ministry but I can tell you the truth based on series of temptation I get these days, the work of a pastor is one of the hardest when it comes to standing against sexual temptation.
Yesterday I also perfectly understood why pastors fall for married women or ladies whose marriage or relationship is in crises during counseling.
.
The truth is counselling a heart broken woman is a big trap. A big trap that can only take God and courage to not fall into. You will be shocked that the person you are counseling is so vulnerable and sexually primed that the greatest emotions flowing through her at that time is a urge to be touched, cuddled, caressed and knacked. I saw everything last night, and my defence began to crack, wane, weakened and almost dissolved completely while the lady was begging time for me to touch her.
.
It was yesterday I realized that deciding to live a holy life or deciding to be a pastor means that you have only signed yourself into continuous sexual temptation. No wonder most pastors fail! I thought I had won the demon of temptation until I experienced the dimension of counseling a broken married lady.
.
I won't go into the story. It's a long crazy one. But pastors will understand what I'm saying .... And if you have not counselled a heartbroken woman either married or single... You can never understand. How I escaped without crashing totally is a mystery.

I use God beg you, abeg give me her phone number

FreeSpirited:
You will never understand what it means to fall into grave sexual temptation until you start living a sexually pure life or until you decide to work for God.
.
I'm not yet a pastor in full time ministry but I can tell you the truth based on series of temptation I get these days, the work of a pastor is one of the hardest when it comes to standing against sexual temptation.
Yesterday I also perfectly understood why pastors fall for married women or ladies whose marriage or relationship is in crises during counseling.
.
The truth is counselling a heart broken woman is a big trap. A big trap that can only take God and courage to not fall into. You will be shocked that the person you are counseling is so vulnerable and sexually primed that the greatest emotions flowing through her at that time is a urge to be touched, cuddled, caressed and knacked. I saw everything last night, and my defence began to crack, wane, weakened and almost dissolved completely while the lady was begging time for me to touch her.
.
It was yesterday I realized that deciding to live a holy life or deciding to be a pastor means that you have only signed yourself into continuous sexual temptation. No wonder most pastors fail! I thought I had won the demon of temptation until I experienced the dimension of counseling a broken married lady.
.
I won't go into the story. It's a long crazy one. But pastors will understand what I'm saying .... And if you have not counselled a heartbroken woman either married or single... You can never understand. How I escaped without crashing totally is a mystery.

Pastor-in-the-making, were you counselling her in your private room? You must not do things in secret because the devil is always there. Stay in the nook of an open space to do your spiritual work.

I know you can't have sex where two or three are gathered. God bless your ministry.

highchief1:
married women Toto sweet pass single girls Toto.i no fit lie for u.and tradition no Dey anywhere.all those talk na wash.na mainly people wife I Dey fork

I think it's bad spirit... It doesn't make sense to me. Just like saying getting high on Cocaine is sweet pass vegetable and egusi soup with goat meat.

Give me clean overloaded sweet 16, 17, 18....and I no go go work that day.

baralatie:
If the husband locked her out for going to church
Then she did not marry a church man
And you claiming whatever you are reveals you own deficiency when you you wrote a broke church man is an angry man

My mind is telling me that this man has spread the lady's legs.

He is just trying to justify his actions.

dollypi:
When a woman says I’m sad, I need someone to talk to, can I come over…

Just know that heightened emotions —-> Sexual vulnerability/arousal, and Negative emotions —-> a need to feel good, feel wanted.

A woman is In a chaotic or low energy state in such cases and will seek to receive a man’s energy to order her chaos or raise her energy level.

If you succumb, your energetic integrity is compromised and your energy field (life-force) diminishes.

I always avoid such women.

Hmmm

FreeSpirited:
Are you this stvpid or naive to not know many churchy religious men have bad marriage while maintaining fake love in public?.. I have seen many including pastors... This shows u are a baby...
And I never claimed I don't have deficiency.
The fact that I allow her to come to my place is one deficiency cos I could smell from her chats that she needed more than encouragement... I had to battle with my willpower to control my hormone..... Same lady first asked me about where to get hotel for cooling off..... I had to deflect it cos I know the meaning... telling her to come over was a risk... Instead of sit down and learn u are talking trash

Just knack the lady and get it over with. I don't see this whole rom-com drama ending any other way.

eastOFwest:
Pastors PA is also a human being. God forgive me, but I've spent a night with a Pastor's wife before. We are all human

Aha!

eastOFwest:
I have experienced life to an extent and come to certain conclusions. Sadly, there was a time that I viewed married women as easy targets and I wasn't proved wrong

1.Married women who are not happy in the marriage.
2.Married women who are going through midlife crisis.