₦airaland Forum

I will not even bother you with long stories.

I'm navigating a complex situation regarding an unplanned pregnancy. Despite initial considerations for termination, medical professionals have strongly advised against it due to potential health risks to the mother, given her previous Cesarean section. As a result, I'm faced with the prospect of having another child, which adds to the complexity of our relationship dynamics.

The relationship with the mother of my child began in 2022, and while we've had some time to adjust to parenthood, our relationship is still evolving. Furthermore, my relationship with her family is strained, which adds another layer of complexity to our situation.

Given the current economic uncertainty, I'm concerned about the financial implications of raising another child. I'm nearing 40, and the mother is 32; we're at different stages in our lives, and I hadn't planned on expanding our family further.

I'd appreciate guidance on potential co-parenting arrangements, financial planning strategies, and support systems that could help us navigate this situation. Specifically, I'd like to explore options for ensuring the well-being of both the mother and our children while also addressing my own concerns and responsibilities.

Confused right now

1phone:
Given the current economic uncertainty, I'm concerned about the financial implications of raising another child.

Nope! I don't think so.
Nope! I don't think so...
Nope! I don't think so.....

Wait?? U dey dis Nigeria?? Re you a graduate?? You never heard of family planning before??

So back to solutions, you no choice than double your hustle, sit down and reason other way money fit come, I hope she also working??

You should have thought about all this stories before you use your device without umbrella.
Abeg start buying baby things joor.
Congratulations

Strive and add another source of income.

So you are good in writing big big grammar but for you to search family planning is a big deal for you..

Don't be scared. Just plan forward. Prepare for your baby's delivery

Yen yen yen yen....


My question is, did you cum inside or not...


No be by Cho Cho Cho....

You go do the wo wor work...



As e dey pain you, e dey sweet me....😂😂😂

I no go lie this kain matter no easy at all. E choke. You dey face real wahala wey touch mind, body, and pocket. But first make I yarn you.These thing wey dey sup, you no dey alone. Many men dey go through things like this, dem just no dey talk am.

Firstly, E dey Okay to Feel Confused, No shame to feel lost or broken. Life no dey follow script sometimes, and you get every right to feel how you dey feel. But make you no let fear freeze you oh! small small, you go find clarity.

Secondly, The Mama Health Na Number One. Since doctor don talk say make una no remove the belle because of her CS before, na her life and health we go first protect. Do your best to support her during this time. Even if una relationship no too strong, make she no feel abandoned. Show up where you fit because some men go run no capping.

The idea of co-parenting Na Better Way, make she too know as e dey go. You fit no dey sure about love or future with her, but two of una fit still co-parent like mature people. Sit down talk the matter. Who go dey responsible for wetin? How una go share time and care for the pikin dem? How money go be even if e hard?
If talk dey hard, involve neutral person or no go dey claim I be man oh! E dey important say una put the children first, not wahala or ego.

Thirdly, You see money matter E No Easy make I no lie you, Plan Small Small. Make we no deceive ourselves belle and children no be beans. E cost. But e still get way wey you fit take balance things. Do budget, focus on wetin dey important like food, hospital, and school. Cut down on jaye-jaye spending and all these urgent 2k side chicks wet most guy men dey get. Check NGO or government help wey fit support parents.

If you fit, run small side hustle based on your skills not betting or Yahoo I mean legit. Communicate with her about money well avoid assumption, talk straight because some women fit get money lock up.

Your Life Never Spoil, You don near 40, and I sabi say e go dey feel like, “wetin I dey do again?” But bros, you still get power to shape your story. Children no mean your dreams don die e just mean say you gats walk wiser and plan better.

You no be failure. You be man wey dey try hold things together. And that alone deserve respect. Wetin Her Family Feel No Go Define You Dem fit no like you now, but no let that one scatter your focus. Just dey do your part with respect and responsibility. Let your actions speak louder than mouth.

Lastly, Life throw you one serious curveball, but you still dey stand. Take am step by step. Focus on and always use leather cover your device because after sometime you go still want lubricate amm.

Now watin you suppose focus on na, Peace of mind, Welfare of the children, Clear communication with their mama, Building back your own life.

You go dey alright. No rush the solution just no give up on yourself or the people wey depend on you.

Na real man dey show up even when e no easy. And bros, you dey show up.

One love and strength to you always.

If she's not good enough for a wife, why turn her to a baby making machine by impregnation her a second time? This is unfair on her and her parents.

Let me ask, would you be happy if your daughter is pregnant the second time for a man who doesn't deem it fit to make her a wife?

Please go and triple your hustle and ensure that you plan your limited resources wisely.

She wey dey do without protection for person wey no wan pay her bride price, she get mind and no be say na obelego.......

But you were not concerned about the economic and financial implications when you was doing kerewa?..Well the truth still remains you must do what you got to do bro..It could have been worse but it’s all good..I still Dey help my friend shed tears cause last month his wife delivered triplets and baba already get 2 for down before..He said just last one but na 3 come outside so we Dey cry together..

1phone:
I will not even bother you with long stories.

I'm navigating a complex situation regarding an unplanned pregnancy. Despite initial considerations for termination, medical professionals have strongly advised against it due to potential health risks to the mother, given her previous Cesarean section. As a result, I'm faced with the prospect of having another child, which adds to the complexity of our relationship dynamics.

The relationship with the mother of my child began in 2022, and while we've had some time to adjust to parenthood, our relationship is still evolving. Furthermore, my relationship with her family is strained, which adds another layer of complexity to our situation.

Given the current economic uncertainty, I'm concerned about the financial implications of raising another child. I'm nearing 40, and the mother is 32; we're at different stages in our lives, and I hadn't planned on expanding our family further.

I'd appreciate guidance on potential co-parenting arrangements, financial planning strategies, and support systems that could help us navigate this situation. Specifically, I'd like to explore options for ensuring the well-being of both the mother and our children while also addressing my own concerns and responsibilities.

Confused right now

Son,
you see these your embellished Cambridge questions of how to go abt co-parenting , financial planning strategies and support system is not a question dat you should ask first.
the very first question you shud ask is how do I formalize my relationship with this woman dt has one child for me and anoda one on the way.
Let's assume the first preg was a silly mistake on ur part because you dint see her as ur spec for marriage.Then why do you keep sleeping wit dt lady? probably you have been lying to her dt you will marry her maybe dts why she kept hope alive and continue keeping in touch with you but alas you were nt sincere with your promise.

Your qtn is wat makes me to assume so.

Let me ask, is it the person you feel you dnt wnt to get married to you will be consistently dropping allowance for mother and child if at all the financial support you desire comes in?

you are torturing dt lady mentally in this situation you both put yourself esp you as the major culprit.
Go back and meet dt woman and clear her doubt as regards her status. That is the first step to your emancipation. You will get a breakthrough in Jesus name.

Children will bring you blessing. Learn to use ovulation time table after this one. Go and look for extra income.
Uber,
Plumbing ,
Digital Marketing,
Distributor of FCMG ,
RealEstate Agent.
Home lesson teacher, the list is endless.

Having two children is not a bad idea.

Oga you give girl belle come here the do chochocho with grammar. Na wetin the baby worn shop be that ? Better go the price diaper, show workings no be chochocho.

Bro use the matchet on the source, put it off immediately, no pleasure no seed.

Kutunban:
I no go lie this kain matter no easy at all. E choke. You dey face real wahala wey touch mind, body, and pocket. But first make I yarn you.These thing wey dey sup, you no dey alone. Many men dey go through things like this, dem just no dey talk am.

Firstly, E dey Okay to Feel Confused, No shame to feel lost or broken. Life no dey follow script sometimes, and you get every right to feel how you dey feel. But make you no let fear freeze you oh! small small, you go find clarity.

Secondly, The Mama Health Na Number One. Since doctor don talk say make una no remove the belle because of her CS before, na her life and health we go first protect. Do your best to support her during this time. Even if una relationship no too strong, make she no feel abandoned. Show up where you fit because some men go run no capping.

The idea of co-parenting Na Better Way, make she too know as e dey go. You fit no dey sure about love or future with her, but two of una fit still co-parent like mature people. Sit down talk the matter. Who go dey responsible for wetin? How una go share time and care for the pikin dem? How money go be even if e hard?
If talk dey hard, involve neutral person or no go dey claim I be man oh! E dey important say una put the children first, not wahala or ego.

Thirdly, You see money matter E No Easy make I no lie you, Plan Small Small. Make we no deceive ourselves belle and children no be beans. E cost. But e still get way wey you fit take balance things. Do budget, focus on wetin dey important like food, hospital, and school. Cut down on jaye-jaye spending and all these urgent 2k side chicks wet most guy men dey get. Check NGO or government help wey fit support parents.

If you fit, run small side hustle based on your skills not betting or Yahoo I mean legit. Communicate with her about money well avoid assumption, talk straight because some women fit get money lock up.

Your Life Never Spoil, You don near 40, and I sabi say e go dey feel like, “wetin I dey do again?” But bros, you still get power to shape your story. Children no mean your dreams don die e just mean say you gats walk wiser and plan better.

You no be failure. You be man wey dey try hold things together. And that alone deserve respect. Wetin Her Family Feel No Go Define You Dem fit no like you now, but no let that one scatter your focus. Just dey do your part with respect and responsibility. Let your actions speak louder than mouth.

Lastly, Life throw you one serious curveball, but you still dey stand. Take am step by step. Focus on and always use leather cover your device because after sometime you go still want lubricate amm.

Now watin you suppose focus on na, Peace of mind, Welfare of the children, Clear communication with their mama, Building back your own life.

You go dey alright. No rush the solution just no give up on yourself or the people wey depend on you.

Na real man dey show up even when e no easy. And bros, you dey show up.

One love and strength to you always.

My guy, I won't mind if we can know ourselves more better, I've not read a pacifying writeups like this in nairaland forum for some years now.
The brotherhood is solemnly proud of you
Thumbs up 👍 Agba baller

Amen
I appreciate.

gerizzim:
Son,
you see these your embellished Cambridge questions of how to go abt co-parenting , financial planning strategies and support system is not a question dat you should ask first.
the very first question you shud ask is how do I formalize my relationship with this woman dt has one child for me and anoda one on the way.
Let's assume the first preg was a silly mistake on ur part because you dint see her as ur spec for marriage.Then why do you keep sleeping wit dt lady? probably you have been lying to her dt you will marry her maybe dts why she kept hope alive and continue keeping in touch with you but alas you were nt sincere with your promise.

Your qtn is wat makes me to assume so.

Let me ask, is it the person you feel you dnt wnt to get married to you will be consistently dropping allowance for mother and child if at all the financial support you desire comes in?

you are torturing dt lady mentally in this situation you both put yourself esp you as the major culprit.
Go back and meet dt woman and clear her doubt as regards her status. That is the first step to your emancipation. You will get a breakthrough in Jesus name.

You claimed to be confused, but your gbola isn't confused . Your gbola is still attacking and scoring goals you claim you don't want . You have a strained relationship with your baby mama's family all because you keep impregnating their daughter without any plan. You keep acting as if it all happened by accident . An healthy man sleeping with an healthy female without protection should expect pregnancy, especially when it has happened before!!!

If you don't want the baby please bring it to me i will take care of the baby

Your relationship with her family is strained? Lol. You impregnated someone’s daughter and refused to marry her and you expect a cordial relationship? Lol
Oga go and propose to her and prepare for introduction/wedding. Make the union official. Marriage comes with so much Favour and lots of open doors you’d begin to wonder why you didn’t do it sooner. Don’t delay your blessings.

Take plenty pictures.

Kutunban:
I no go lie this kain matter no easy at all. E choke. You dey face real wahala wey touch mind, body, and pocket. But first make I yarn you.These thing wey dey sup, you no dey alone. Many men dey go through things like this, dem just no dey talk am.

Firstly, E dey Okay to Feel Confused, No shame to feel lost or broken. Life no dey follow script sometimes, and you get every right to feel how you dey feel. But make you no let fear freeze you oh! small small, you go find clarity.

Secondly, The Mama Health Na Number One. Since doctor don talk say make una no remove the belle because of her CS before, na her life and health we go first protect. Do your best to support her during this time. Even if una relationship no too strong, make she no feel abandoned. Show up where you fit because some men go run no capping.

The idea of co-parenting Na Better Way, make she too know as e dey go. You fit no dey sure about love or future with her, but two of una fit still co-parent like mature people. Sit down talk the matter. Who go dey responsible for wetin? How una go share time and care for the pikin dem? How money go be even if e hard?
If talk dey hard, involve neutral person or no go dey claim I be man oh! E dey important say una put the children first, not wahala or ego.

Thirdly, You see money matter E No Easy make I no lie you, Plan Small Small. Make we no deceive ourselves belle and children no be beans. E cost. But e still get way wey you fit take balance things. Do budget, focus on wetin dey important like food, hospital, and school. Cut down on jaye-jaye spending and all these urgent 2k side chicks wet most guy men dey get. Check NGO or government help wey fit support parents.

If you fit, run small side hustle based on your skills not betting or Yahoo I mean legit. Communicate with her about money well avoid assumption, talk straight because some women fit get money lock up.

Your Life Never Spoil, You don near 40, and I sabi say e go dey feel like, “wetin I dey do again?” But bros, you still get power to shape your story. Children no mean your dreams don die e just mean say you gats walk wiser and plan better.

You no be failure. You be man wey dey try hold things together. And that alone deserve respect. Wetin Her Family Feel No Go Define You Dem fit no like you now, but no let that one scatter your focus. Just dey do your part with respect and responsibility. Let your actions speak louder than mouth.

Lastly, Life throw you one serious curveball, but you still dey stand. Take am step by step. Focus on and always use leather cover your device because after sometime you go still want lubricate amm.

Now watin you suppose focus on na, Peace of mind, Welfare of the children, Clear communication with their mama, Building back your own life.

You go dey alright. No rush the solution just no give up on yourself or the people wey depend on you.

Na real man dey show up even when e no easy. And bros, you dey show up.

One love and strength to you always.

Baba, three gbosa for you. You have a fan now bro. I like the way you ginger and encourage some. More grace and wisdom and money to you bro

Not good for a wife,but good enough to dive in raw with…
It has happened niyen ooo,man up and face life..

When you are doing push up without protection, you should expect that result in your mind.

Double hustle and don't think of terminating any pregnancy

Just get married to her already

Don’t y'all know about family planning? You know how to construct your problem with good English ( e fit be ChatGPT) but you don’t know how to save yourself from unnecessary financial burden of caring for extra mouth by just ensuring family planning or abstinence sef.

Again, just get married. Because who you wan leave single mother of two for?

You may be confused but your dick is not because it will go back for the third child later. Enjoy fatherhood jare. Children are blessing from God so enjoy them. Pampers is expensive but you guys can use napkin or even wrapper to tie the child, you will not be the first. Baby milk is expensive but your baby mama has breast naa. All you lose over a baby is night sleep and hospital fees. If she breastfeeds baby well, it will not fall sick easily so you will not to spend too much on medicine. All I'm saying is keep your head up brother and congratulations

You say wetin ?😂😂

Dzzzz:
But you were not concerned about the economic and financial implications when you was doing kerewa?..Well the truth still remains you must do what you got to do bro..It could have been worse but it’s all good..I still Dey help my friend shed tears cause last month his wife delivered triplets and baba already get 2 for down before..He said just last one but na 3 come outside so we Dey cry together..

Oga, face your fears, na man you be.