₦airaland Forum

Ijoba85:
Feminists are filled with entitlement mentality . I don't know who bewitched them . Ole jatijati . No toto no money .Period !

There is nothing feminist about the girls from his description. You can easily continue to pay money for your toto, but what OP is looking for is where he does not have to pay money at all for a relationship.

OP keeps getting into relationships with women who are looking for financial help. That is it! And when it is revealed that he is not what they want after all, he complains that his relationships are to blame when he is the one who keeps dating these girls.

jimmyolasun:
I have come to realize that if you are broke, your relationship won't last no matter how good a lady is.. except she is a long time girlfriend or a desperate one..

Not necessarily you spend lavishly or stupidly on a lady but be financially available at a point.. be discreet on spending.. but if not, just work on your financial stability first before getting into anything serious

this is not how it is in other countries. Have you wondered why Nigeria girls are lonely overseas but Nigeria men are hot cake.?

No one wants Nigerian girls for serious relationship. We set and allow such standard here and it's very wrong from all shades

Rearealki:
I know myself I am not STINGY.
I am feel I am been manipulated be these ladies

Craze dey worry you, I swear. You even told her you're breaking up when you need to block her pata pata for ur life.

You sound like one of dem simp.

She wants to be taken care of by a man, and she left her father!
Yeye!

A girl that loves you won't bill you.
A girl that bills you will eventually dump you when you stop giving or when she meets a wealthier person.
A girl that loves you will even buy things for you with her money.

Sorry for the disappointment.

What I deduced is that she called you to be in relationship with you so that you can start taking care her responsibilities. Unless you have special connections with her and you feel something great for her, that's just a big red flag.

Someone who does not see you as partner and sees you as only responsibility carrier is a NO for me. Love yourself first, be kind in your little way with people, and keep hoping for the best to come.

Nothing is wrong with you op. The success of a relationship is not in how long it lasts. Long lasting relationship costs a lot so it's better for you when it doesn't last.

Go and follow Geh Geh, listen to his advices and your mentality will change.

Didn't you read the part where op said they haven't had s*x but the girls were demanding for money all the time. No girl who satisfies a man sexually would be denied money when she request for one.

Kobojunkie:
There is nothing feminist about the girls from his description. You can easily continue to pay money for your toto, but what OP is looking for is where he does not have to pay money at all for a relationship.

OP keeps getting into relationships with women who are looking for financial help. That is it! And when it is revealed that he is not what they want after all, he complains that his relationships are to blame when he is the one who keeps dating these girls.

Rearealki:
I am really concerned about this.
My last relationship ended like my first.
Billing!
Ok, so this lady called me that we should be in a relationship. I was excited about it and we started dating.
We haven't had sex we are both Christians.
This particular week she started testing me financially. First she said she is hungry, later she said her phone spoilt then she said she needs a new laptop.
What made us breakup was when she said she needed airtime. And as at then I didn't even have any available money except my savings I said I don't have
She then told me she deserves to be taken care of that she hasn't asked me directly of anything than this airtime. It shows I am stingy...and if it's happening like this this early we might have to cutoff. She said is it because we both work in same place and we earn same salary? ,she said I should take care of her
So I thought about her statements and I told her we should break up. That I am not ready.
I

This same scenario happened to me in my first relationship. I really loved my first love. But she pressured me financially. Which led me to all end it.

It seems your Leo

fineboynl:
this is not how it is in other countries. Have you wondered why Nigeria girls are lonely overseas but Nigeria make are hot cake.?

No one wants Nigerian girls for serious relationship. We set and allow such standard here and it's very wrong from all shades

I understand it is not so in other countries but the standard had been set already. It is rare to see a different lady here in this country. And I don't think it is possible to come across a lady who will want to Dutch in a relationship except as I said in my first post, a long time girlfriend ( someone you both grew together) or a desperate one.. I believe you can understand what I post because I am such a lazy person when it comes to typing...

Wadoh:
Yes, it’s true that some women enter relationships hoping to escape poverty, and some do treat their partner like an ATM. But to say that’s the "average Nigerian girl" is an unfair and lazy generalization.

Let’s be honest, many men also chase relationships for sex, status, or convenience—should we then call that the average Nigerian man? Nigeria is tough—but love doesn’t have to be.
Stop saying “that’s how all girls are.”
Start saying: “That’s not what I want—and I’ll wait for what I deserve.”

Not every woman wants your pocket. Some genuinely want your peace, your vision, and your presence.

You have no idea what some of us have been through in the hands of these women. Unfortunately they still act the same way here in the UK.
So when I say average Nigerian girl. I no Wetin I dey talk. The average Nigerian girl is not interested in your growth, those who are are 3 out of 10 which is below average.
I can go out of my way and break my rules for a woman who gives me peace but you see these ones who just want to sit in front of a RangeRover and order food then complain about the food they can't even make for me. Hell no.

Women! How can you be earning same salary as a man and still expect him to spoil you. Like he doesn't have needs or families that invested in his education or what?

This is witchcraft. Nothing else. If you like let her gaslight you and steal your salary. She will still leave you once a richer man comes along and will tell you, is it from the small salary that you want to settle down? My brother, focus of self development. You will be the one to chase them when you're doing well for yourself. Bunch of Almajiri.

Father's should do better when training their daughters, all these armed robber orientation needs to be curbed. Haba.

potent5:
Stop going all over the places looking for relationships. Get money and you will get a stable relationship.

Money alone can't be one stable in relationship.

Rearealki:
I know myself I am not STINGY.
I am feel I am been manipulated be these ladies

Most nigerian ladies are like that the fault is not actually from you but just the normal nigerian culture where ladies feel entitled once you are in a relationship with them white ladies don't behave like this. This is the reason why they always fall victim to evil men like ritualists and yahoo boys who meet their immediate needs but later used them for rituals.

Shawarmagirl:
OP, you have issue with commitment. If you don't learn how to spend on your woman while in a relationship, you'll never spend on your wife when you get married. The prove of love is given. For God so loved the world that He GAVE (commitment).

He said he is not a stingy person do u want him to spend beyond his income or go steal to meet up with the demands of the lady?

columbus007:
Lolz, bto the same thing happened to some of us, what can one do, at the very end you will have to pick the one you can manage. It is in their mentality. 😁

How do you guys end up with these kinds of ladies. I used to think it only happens with guys chasing after girls showcasing themselves on social media media. None of the few girls I'd dated before marriage had been billing me. Yes there's that occasional explanation of a challenge they have that needs financial assistant but they won't even feel comfortable to make a request,talk less of feeling entitled. I choose to help on my own when I want to. And they appreciate when I do and don't complain when I don't.

safarifarms:
How do you guys end up with these kinds of ladies. I used to think it only happens with guys chasing after girls showcasing themselves on social media media. None of the few girls I'd dated before marriage had been billing me. Yes there's that occasional explanation of a challenge they have that needs financial assistant but they won't even feel comfortable to make a request,talk less of feeling entitled. I choose to help on my own when I want to. And they appreciate when I do and don't complain when I don't.

then you must be the lucky one, bro I tell you, this being a thing I haven't told anyone, I have never meant with a girl who went friendly with me for who I am, never., at a time in my life I was praying to God to lessen the body in me, maybe because I look it to them, of which I am still managing. I have been very unlucky kind of.

columbus007:
then you must be the lucky one, bro I tell you, this being a thing I haven't told anyone, I have never meant with a girl who went friendly with me for who I am, never., at a time in my life I was praying to God to lessen the body in me, maybe because I look it to them, of which I am still managing. I have been very unlucky kind of.

No, I'm not the only lucky one. I used to feel my best friend had better luck as his then girlfriend (now his wife) used to support him so much financially. My friend spent on her too. When my friend bought a car she helped balance the money. When he bought an uncompleted building for about 2m at that time his woman contributed 600k. I'd wished I was as lucky. But that could happen because besides loving him, she also had the money.

I suspect you may be going after a woman who is not interested in you. If a woman is interested in you she will want to spend on you if she has.

safarifarms:
No, I'm not the only lucky one. I used to feel my best friend had better luck as his then girlfriend (now his wife) used to support him so much financially. My friend spent on her too. When my friend bought a car she helped balance the money. When he bought an uncompleted building for about 2m at that time his woman contributed 600k. I'd wished I was as lucky. But that could happen because besides loving him, she also had the money.

I suspect you may be going after a woman who is not interested in you. If a woman is interested in you she will want to spend on you if she has.

I have learn my humble lessons not to ever attempt to any too flashy, I guess the problem started from there, all my exes ate always very beautiful but most times pocket draining too.

safarifarms:
No, I'm not the only lucky one. I used to feel my best friend had better luck as his then girlfriend (now his wife) used to support him so much financially. My friend spent on her too. When my friend bought a car she helped balance the money. When he bought an uncompleted building for about 2m at that time his woman contributed 600k. I'd wished I was as lucky. But that could happen because besides loving him, she also had the money.

I suspect you may be going after a woman who is not interested in you. If a woman is interested in you she will want to spend on you if she has.

If all ladies are like that, none of them would have remained unmarried, we see most ladies around us now as a non too serious type, and seeing that they are also after your wallet it's soo worrisome bro,. I like to give, but judiciously.

Ijoba85:
✓ Didn't you read the part where op said they haven't had s*x but the girls were demanding for money all the time. No girl who satisfies a man sexually would be denied money when she request for one.

Oh, and you take that to mean that IOP would have bought the gal a laptop if they had been having sex? 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

columbus007:
I have learn my humble lessons not to ever attempt to any too flashy, I guess the problem started from there, all my exes ate always very beautiful but most times pocket draining too.

In the 1st instance I'm not attracted to flashy ladies. They usually appear as wayward to me. I'm more attracted to ladies that are homely.

For instance the 2nd thing that drew me to my wife aside her intelligence (which was first) was her decent dressing. I also observed that while still a student at the time (in her final year) I never saw her on trousers. I deduced that she really honoured her church doctrine or parents objection to trousers even while away from her parents eyes. I didn't know it wasn't really the case, she actually had trousers but just wasn't a fan of wearing trousers. Also she was using a simple button phone which I replaced with a better phone. She later dashed the phone to her younger brother who needed a phone that can browse for school research and managed her old button phone. You see, she isn't really materialistic. I still got her another even much better phone. And all these were not requested by her. I did them on my own. We are now happily married for years now.

If you go after flashy ladies then you must join with other guys they have to fund their lifestyle.

Strictly for my Nigerian Women
If you are HUNGRY go and look for food
If your are CASHLESS and JOBLESS kindly go and look for work
If you have nothing doing please go and learn skills or hand work of your choice
You love him and him loves you too but you are telling the man to prove his love to you by giving you gift if we ask you to prove yours you said nah your body
Are you guys are f**LS or something
Our ladies stop billing
What your father and your brothers can't do for you is what you are pressuring another person son to do for you.
An average Naija girl is hungry yes we know because you are looking for boyfriend to Bill instead of work to do
Zuzuwenu

safarifarms:
In the 1st instance I'm not attracted to flashy ladies. They usually appear as wayward to me. I'm more attracted to ladies that are homely.

For instance the 2nd thing that drew me to my wife aside her intelligence (which was first) was her decent dressing. I also observed that while still a student at the time (in her final year) I never saw her on trousers. I deduced that she really honoured her church doctrine or parents objection to trousers even while away from her parents eyes. I didn't know it wasn't really the case, she actually had trousers but just wasn't a fan of wearing trousers. Also she was using a simple button phone which I replaced with a better phone. She later dashed the phone to her younger brother who needed a phone that can browse for school research and managed her old button phone. You see, she isn't really materialistic. I still got her another even much better phone. And all these were not requested by her. I did them on my own. We are now happily married for years now.

If you go after flashy ladies then you must join with other guys they have to fund their lifestyle.

Lolz, you are absolutely very correct and as well too truthful., just like they where sent from somewhere to deal with me, now I am babe less. It wasn't easy for while I got out. Its been a funny tales

Shawarmagirl:
OP, you have issue with commitment. If you don't learn how to spend on your woman while in a relationship, you'll never spend on your wife when you get married. The prove of love is given. For God so loved the world that He GAVE (commitment).

U sabi tvvist scriptures oooo..impressive welldone!!
.but hey!!! .God gave his son.....You too spread naa let me give u son or adopt one for you.

which one is laptop, wig, money for food, money for airtime, money for phone, transport money, birthday money all after a brief period of meeting each other...?

£ntitlement m£ntality, g®€€d and £#ploit@tn of peoples feelings r not attractive moves when you just met.

I don't know how y'all confidently justify these things... Butt when it involves your sons or brothers, then yall become more rational ...

Rearealki:
I know myself I am not STINGY.
I am feel I am been manipulated be these ladies

Continue feeling like that and you'll be counting breakups. It's not that deep jarey, if u find d one you like, give her shit even she asks

Wadoh:
Dear Guys,

If a woman starts "testing" your love with money early in the relationship—run.

Love is not a billing system. It’s not a constant demand for airtime, phones, or laptops—especially when you’re just getting started.

You’re not stingy for protecting your peace and your pocket. You're wise.

Real love supports, not drains. It builds with you, not off you.

You deserve someone who sees your heart, not your wallet.

Choose peace over pressure. Always.

#KnowYourWorth #MenDeserveLoveToo #NotAnATM

Most ladies who are genuinely in love find it hard to burden their partner financially, especially when they know he's going through tough times. But if a man has money and still makes no financial effort toward his partner, it can come across as a lack of love or emotional investment because most men who are truly in love naturally go out of their way to show it, including through giving.

At the same time, a woman who is truly in love will also give in her own way. She may buy her partner gifts or even support him financially during hard times; not out of obligation, but because she genuinely cares. Love is never just about receiving; it's about mutual effort and care.

It's actually a good thing he left her. He should find someone who genuinely loves him. At the same time, love shouldn't be one-sided. He needs to be kind and emotionally present too.

Many women are emotionally expressive, and once they're in love, it becomes quite visible. A relationship shouldn't just exist for the sake of it; it should have depth, meaning, and mutual care. It is important to put in effort to nurture the relationship. Often, it's the little things a man does that make a woman feel loved and secure.

When two people are truly in love, they tend to understand each other almost effortlessly. Even the standards they initially set can naturally soften over time. More often than not, it's external factors; like jealousy, gossip, or third parties; that create conflict between them, not the absence of love.

Wadoh:
It’s not lack of money that ends most relationships. It’s the lack of purpose, direction, and effort that often comes with being broke for too long without a plan to grow. Don’t lead with your bank account. Lead with your drive, your honesty, and your ambition.
The right woman won’t mind starting small—if she sees you’re going somewhere.

Wadoh you dey whine??

My ex babe asked me for 500kpa to rent house told her i have mad expenses but will give you the money in bits till she it gets competed cos i had a bad experience previous year all in the name of renting house for babe, she got the money from someone else and started giving attitude till relationship packed up

This was a babe i asked you wan rent house how much you get she talk say she no get anything but she dey expect ajo soonest.


You see this our generation ehh na money for hand back for ground.

Merry100:
Most ladies who are genuinely in love find it hard to burden their partner financially, especially when they know he's going through tough times. But if a man has money and still makes no financial effort toward his partner, it can come across as a lack of love or emotional investment because most men who are truly in love naturally go out of their way to show it, including through giving.

At the same time, a woman who is truly in love will also give in her own way. She may buy her partner gifts or even support him financially during hard times; not out of obligation, but because she genuinely cares. Love is never just about receiving; it's about mutual effort and care.

It's actually a good thing he left her. He should find someone who genuinely loves him. At the same time, love shouldn't be one-sided. He needs to be kind and emotionally present too.

Many women are emotionally expressive, and once they're in love, it becomes quite visible. A relationship shouldn't just exist for the sake of it; it should have depth, meaning, and mutual care. It is important to put in effort to nurture the relationship. Often, it's the little things a man does that make a woman feel loved and secure.

When two people are truly in love, they tend to understand each other almost effortlessly. Even the standards they initially set can naturally soften over time. More often than not, it's external factors; like jealousy, gossip, or third parties; that create conflict between them, not the absence of love.

True

You see this our generation, e get as e be. But make we dey reason am well.

You talk say you no gree drop the 500k at once because of past experience — which make sense. Person wey don burn hand before suppose dey cautious.

But make we also talk true — if babe tell you say she no get anything and dey expect ajo, and you still no sure say you go fit help her sharp sharp, wetin make you dey hold her down? E no go dey fair like that too.

E fit be say as she see say you no really ready to support her fully, she find another way. No be say na attitude she give you, maybe na survival instinct kick in.

This life no balance, but make we no always dey quick talk say "money for hand, back for ground" — sometimes na misunderstanding, sometimes na mismatch of expectations.

At the end, everybody dey find who go show up for dem without stress or delay. Make we all learn, no carry bitterness enter next level. Life still dey ahead.

zanshi:
Wadoh you dey whine??

My ex babe asked me for 500kpa to rent house told her i have mad expenses but will give you the money in bits till she it gets competed cos i had a bad experience previous year all in the name of renting house for babe, she got the money from someone else and started giving attitude till relationship packed up

This was a babe i asked you wan rent house how much you get she talk say she no get anything but she dey expect ajo soonest.


You see this our generation ehh na money for hand back for ground.