₦airaland Forum

"They say you can turn a bad girl good. But once a good girl's gone bad, she's gone forever · I'll mourn forever." - Jay Z

Kobojunkie:
So, why insist OP's wife still had a fault?

I didn't even read the OP's story

For those advising the OP to get her red handed or to ask his wife questions to know the truth.

The question I want to ask you is - after knowing the truth does that solve his problem?

That’s the extravagant story some deluded folks sell to men. A lot of women too sell that to men and only dumbass men suck it in and accept it.

That you monitor your woman doesn’t mean you’re insecure. Women are sexually vulnerable. It only takes a random guy to say what a woman wishes to hear at the right time , and if that guy knows and could read the sign, he would Bleep her.

When your woman knows you’re sensitive to loose boundaries, she would not dare some things. And that reduces her chances of cheating on you. It doesn’t completely stop her though. But it checks her to some extent.

OP, you have to be brutal and please don’t allow your frame shake. Stand your ground, and ensure she feels the impact of her action.

Do this as long as you’re healed of the psychological trauma she caused you. Then you can redefine your marriage contract going forward.

Xso666:
Hello nairalanders, I am new to this forum ...


Till now I don’t just know what to do because I married this woman a virgin but she has turned something else and I don’t know if to tell her parents or handle this like a man within us here although she told me she didn’t do anything with him that he tried to have her but she didn’t but how do I believe that please guys help me move this to front page so I get more suggestions as I am really confused.

Hmmmm,

Here today because of you, Xso666.

The 666 in your name, coincidence or intentional?

First, let it sink into your medula OPOLOganta that virginity is different from virtue. Your wife has one and not the other.

If you are on X (formerly Twitter),

@jon_d_ doe (Agba John Doe) will assert that she HAS cheated on you 💯. He will not even respond to your DM for wasting his precious time.

@wizarab10 (Sir Dickson) will tell you to FLING her.

@Unkleayo (S.A.L.A.K.O🕊) posted a video by @fanta_de_joker (a TikToker) around 10am titled 'Precious & Lies 5&6.' Go and watch the video and you have the answer you are looking for.

So many ladies, very many, protect their chastity because of people like you - Hymen worshippers.

Kpele in advance.

Xso666:
She has sworn with everything that she didn’t do anything with the guy. We promised not to involve 3rd party in our relationship but at this point I am thinking of doing that which is why I came here to seek advice and not to act based on emotions because I love my wife so much

Oga if your wife haven't done anything with the guy she wouldn't have reacted the way she did when you saw two of them together, the guy wouldn't have discharged immediately when he saw you, and they would not be walking together in the streets. Also she's a liar! She told you that she was at home but that was a lie. Well I think deep down you know that your wife is cheating but you're still on the denial phase. My advice to you is start saving money for DNA test, stock up on blood pressure meds and begin to pray that you don't get STDs... Because wahala dey ahead.

jaxxy:
She was a virgin in the village not city. Also She has no discipline like he thought.

It doesn't matter if she was a virgin in the village. Are there not human beings in the village?

The truth is, virginity kept for validation, not conviction, is just delayed confusion. Any discipline practiced for external praise is bound to fail under pressure.

Many virgins hold out, expecting a fairytale, only to realize that marriage isn’t magic. Expectations ruin more than temptation ever could.

Some men treat their wives like donkeys; just piling burdening on them and denying them true value. They assume that rendering them unproductive will tame them.

There’s no clear evidence she’s sexually involved. She might simply be handling her boredom the wrong way.

Merry100:
It doesn't matter if she was a virgin in the village. Are there not human beings in the village?

The truth is, virginity kept for validation, not conviction, is just delayed confusion. Any discipline practiced for external praise is bound to fail under pressure.

Many virgins hold out, expecting a fairytale, only to realize that marriage isn’t magic. Expectations ruin more than temptation ever could.

Some men treat their wives like donkeys; just piling burdening on them and denying them true value. They assume that rendering them unproductive will tame them.

There’s no clear evidence she’s sexually involved. She might simply be handling her boredom the wrong way.

This your conclusion or should I say defence of the OP’s wife is incredibly ridiculous. I suppose you know that the lady in question is not a baby or minor that needs the guidance of an adult.

How then would you say she’s handling her boredom the wrong way.

In fact, even when the guy is already knacking the hell out of her you people will still make excuses for her.

Let me be clear with you - cheating is not until when your man or woman knacks outside.

If you abandon your partner to give full attention to a third party is also a form of cheating.

In short cheating is giving what exclusively meant for your partner to another.

You people should stop encouraging fornication and cheating in the name of claiming woke Abegi

Merry100:
It doesn't matter if she was a virgin in the village. Are there not human beings in the village?

The truth is, virginity kept for validation, not conviction, is just delayed confusion. Any discipline practiced for external praise is bound to fail under pressure.

Many virgins hold out, expecting a fairytale, only to realize that marriage isn’t magic. Expectations ruin more than temptation ever could.

Some men treat their wives like donkeys; just piling burdening on them and denying them true value. They assume that rendering them unproductive will tame them.

There’s no clear evidence she’s sexually involved. She might simply be handling her boredom the wrong way.

They will be straffing this one wife and he will still be defending his own wife

Kobojunkie:
Are you sure you are OK in the head at all?

That question is supposed to be for you going by your username kobo-junkie-head

Kobojunkie:
I am glad someone else posted this and not me. 🥱🥱🥱

It must rain today o
For the first time we agree on a point!

This is good news o!

Shalom!

emynike2001:
True talk ooo, seriously speaking this what am also thinking. She has been in the game for long and have masked herself with the virgin stuff just to deceive her unsuspecting husband to believe what she was not.


Its a game!


How would she just turn promiscuous in just a week or two? And even lied to her husband that she was in the house even when she's absent even saying its battery issues and so on. She has mastered the game.

If truly she is a virgin, she should have been reserved, homely and so on..there are virtues that goes with it.

She doesn't even display any of those virtues.

They want to sponsor a narrative that virginity is not important, hence their fictional cock and bull story!
SMH!

Sit her down and have a heart to heart discussion with her, probably she is having issue staying alone. A woman is not like some men that can sleep with anything, there must be an attraction first. She may need help instead of judgment

FRANCISTOWN:
But the ones who marry community properties are very secure?

Okay then

It's character that matters. Virginity doesn't guarantee character.

Hmmm. This na serious matter ooo. For me, I will discontinue with the marriage and relate the matter to her parents ASAP. The fact that she lied of being at home, no light and others is highly questionable. Also she coming back to her matrimonial home with a man at an ungodly hour makes her even more guilty. Pls sir apply caution and maturity in this matter as everyone isn't the same

Gentledude52:
Hmmm. This na serious matter ooo. For me, I will discontinue with the marriage and relate the matter to her parents ASAP. The fact that she lied of being at home, no light and others is highly questionable. Also she coming back to her matrimonial home with a man at an ungodly hour makes her even more guilty. Pls sir apply caution and maturity in this matter as everyone isn't the same

You should check my next post to see how it all turned out to be

Gentledude52:
Hmmm. This na serious matter ooo. For me, I will discontinue with the marriage and relate the matter to her parents ASAP. The fact that she lied of being at home, no light and others is highly questionable. Also she coming back to her matrimonial home with a man at an ungodly hour makes her even more guilty. Pls sir apply caution and maturity in this matter as everyone isn't the same

Check my recent post to see how it later turned out to be

Xso666:
Check my recent post to see how it later turned out to be

According to Nigerian culture, the moment a woman starts cheating, her husband will also begin to experience misfortune in his finance/business.

Most men who sleep with married women also do it for ritual, in order to steal your favour. I'm telling you from experience because it happened in my street.

If you continue living with the woman, the next thing is sickness & death. She already sees you as a fool because you believe the rubbish she told you.

Make up your mind that you have lost your wife, then immediately return her to her family and expose everything that happened. If you are wrong, you apologize later. But your life is more important than anything else.

You are not better than those guys who were poisoned by their wives. It's only a matter of time that man in your street will convince her to finish you.

You can ignore & learn the hard way

delugadou:
According to Nigerian culture, the moment a woman starts cheating, her husband will also begin to experience misfortune in his finance/business.

Most men who sleep with married women also do it for ritual, in order to steal your favour. I'm telling you from experience because it happened in my street.

If you continue living with the woman, the next thing is sickness & death. She already sees you as a fool because you believe the rubbish she told you.

Make up your mind that you have lost your wife, then immediately return her to her family and expose everything that happened. If you are wrong, you apologize later. But your life is more important than anything else.

You are not better than those guys who were poisoned by their wives. It's only a matter of time that man in your street will convince her to finish you.

You can ignore & learn the hard way

Thank you for your contribution

Gentledude52:
Hmmm. This na serious matter ooo. For me, I will discontinue with the marriage and relate the matter to her parents ASAP. The fact that she lied of being at home, no light and others is highly questionable. Also she coming back to her matrimonial home with a man at an ungodly hour makes her even more guilty. Pls sir apply caution and maturity in this matter as everyone isn't the same

It later turned out to be something else she got pregnant and doesn’t allow me touch her again

Your wife is just crafting plausible excuses to avoid serious consequences of her actions.

Let me be very plain to you. Your wife has been cheating on you, and, she will continues cheating on you if allowed.
1. No cheating woman, cheats once as long as the social dynamics, uncontrollable sexual urge and/or the economic status that triggered that her infidelity, are constant

2. She had been intentionally in her actions. That is why she switched off her phone while engaging in her illicit acts. She didn't want you to disturb her at that material point in time.

You went to visit a man for many hours with your phone switched off, and, you tell me the man did not have his way. Visiting him alone is already enough reason for me to send you packing.

I can give you 100 reasons why she will cheats again. And, I'm not an advocate of forgiveness when it comes to woman cheating.

You have to report her to her parents and, send her packing. She has betrayed the vow she made.

Listen to me. A cheating wife is more dangerous than a poison . Be CAREFULL

Listen to me me you lot. That you married a virgin is not a yardstick to her fidelity. So many things can change a woman's behaviour. Take this to the bank!




Hello nairalanders, I am new to this forum and I was introduced by a friend of mine to this forum to seek advice on how to go about my marital issue.

Here is the problem, I married my wife a virgin and as at that time she was almost done with schooling as I met her when I went to stay with a friend around her school area. So we connected and then I told her I had interest in her and I would like for us to be in a relationship so she agreed and we started dating.

Fast forward to 2024 she was done with school so I went to pay her bride price and then brought her over to Lagos where I stay and then we started living together as husband and wife.

Everything has been moving fine after I disvirgined my wife and I felt like I was the luckiest man on earth and I feel like I already made it in life because I believe as a man if you get a good wife then you have solved 80% of your problem the remaining 20% will be making money to sustain the family.

So of lately I notice my virgin wife became so addicted to sex that she barely can’t go a day without sex and I am ready to give it to her any day any time.

So I traveled for work sometimes around feb 2025 and I stayed 2 weeks over there so when I came back I decided to take a stroll with my wife to get something down the street so I noticed as I was getting something she greeted a guy that sells female stuffs in my street so immediately I turned to talk to her she quickly discharged the guy and then they both acted like they were not talking together well I was unbothered because I mean the guy is just a trader doing his business and maybe she bought something from him and so I suspected nothing. Not until I noticed my wife likes going out to get things and she would spend time outside and this is something she doesn’t like doing before so I thought she is getting used to the Lagos life and so she is enjoying herself now and comfortable now in Lagos. I never had any insecurities whatsoever because I don’t believe she could have anything to do with any man since I married her a virgin although I know she has high sexual drive but I still think she can’t do no such thing.

Fast forward to sometimes around June I traveled again but this time somewhere close to where I live so I told her I would be spending a week or more and so I left to work getting there we lodged and waiting for update as regards to why we are here so on the 3rd day the contractor called and said we should all go and come back that the job has been rescheduled till the next month so I decided to go back home that same day since it was not far from where I stay so I tried reaching out to my wife’s number but she wasn’t reachable so I thought her phone was off, so I boarded a bus home to relax and break the news to her only to find my house locked and my wife wasn’t home and her phone was not going through so I managed to open the door using my spare key and then went inside and took my shower then I went to the kitchen but there was no food to eat so I decided to prepare something for us to eat in the house. I tried reaching my wife again and still not reachable and it was getting late already so I was worried and was curious to know what happened to her because she’s not so conversant with areas in Lagos. So I decided to pray and take some wine while I wait to think of my next action.

Suddenly she messaged me and told me she has not been able to charge her phone and there have not been light in the house, so I asked her where she was and she told me she was in the house and then I told her to come on video call I want to show her something I got for her but she told me the ba3 will die that she managed to use this to call me so I know she’s fine well I told her there was no problem and she should do her to make sure the battery don’t die so we can communicate tonight. So I went outside the compound only for me to find my wife coming back that night with this guy that sells female stuffs down the street and she was so shocked to see me at home she shouted immediately saw me and the guy just disappeared from no where.

Till now I don’t just know what to do because I married this woman a virgin but she has turned something else and I don’t know if to tell her parents or handle this like a man within us here although she told me she didn’t do anything with him that he tried to have her but she didn’t but how do I believe that please guys help me move this to front page so I get more suggestions as I am really confused.[/quote]

HyAccent11:
"They say you can turn a bad girl good. But once a good girl's gone bad, she's gone forever · I'll mourn forever." - Jay Z

Honestly speaking once a good girl turn bad then forget about her

I can't go through stress of reading many comments, but I know this is a cook story

Sirhush:
I can't go through stress of reading many comments, but I know this is a cook story

Bro it is never a cook story I am facing a lot of challenges now in this marriage and when I get a chance I will post my recent happenings now since my wife got pregnant