₦airaland Forum

Good day, Nairalanders.
Please, I need your honest opinion on this matter.

I met this girl about a year ago when I went to purchase some goods at her workplace. She was really caring and even helped me carry some of the goods to the roadside. When I tried to tip her, she refused.

At that time, I was living in Ivory Coast, so after returning there, I chatted her up and expressed my interest in her. She initially agreed to date me but later changed her mind.

When I later visited Nigeria, she came to see me at my hotel. However, she didn’t allow anything intimate to happen. On several occasions when she visited, each time I made a move, she would walk out without even asking for transport fare. I would always call her back to ask why she acted that way, but her reasons were never clear.

Still, I kept supporting her in my own little way, even though I knew deep down she might never accept me. When I started getting tired of the situation, I told her I was moving on.

At this point, I had already rented an apartment close to the Benin Republic border — I chose that location because the electricity is stable and the rent is paid quarterly, with no agency fees.

Last week, she chatted me up asking if I didn’t want her to visit. I told her I did, but that I’d prefer someone who could spend a few days with me. She agreed to spend two days.

However, on the morning of the day she was supposed to come, she messaged me again, saying she had changed her mind and wouldn’t be sleeping over — but that when she came, I could “ask for anything.” Long story short, she eventually came, and that was the first time we had sex.

Now here’s where the issue starts.

She currently lives with her biological sister and a female friend. When she came, she told me that she, her sister, and their friend wanted to move in with me because they didn’t have money to rent their own place. I actually liked the idea and agreed. I even spoke with her sister about it.

But now, her sister and their friend have changed their minds. They say they prefer to move back to the East rather than come live with me. I even offered to pay three months’ rent for them in a similar apartment here, but they still refused.

Mind you, the reason I wanted them to move closer was so they could find something doing here — unlike their current situation, where they’re broke and dependent. Whenever I send my girlfriend ₦15,000, it barely lasts two days because she’s the one taking care of the rest since they’re not working.

How long can this continue?

Now, my girlfriend isn’t really the problem — her sister and their friend are. They don’t want her to move in with me, and she also can’t make any move without their consent. I’ve now decided not to rent any place for them in Lagos.

Nairalanders, what’s your take on this?

😂 😂
You better rent o
Why do you think she finally decided to give you the 🫛… planning on using you.. if you like believe it or not… and now you don’t wanna rent …

Secondly, she’s still attached to those two people.. her sister I get but friend… your girl never mature fully yet .. when she’s ready she will stop footing the bills of lazy people

Thirdly continue to send money as money miss road man o

In 2025AD?

Or maybe you are in a different time

Let her make the decision by herself but tell her your plan for her, because it will definitely drain you if your babe is still with them and you send her money they will always share the money with her...so let her understand that the best thing for her is to allow her friend and sister go back to east and she stay with you..then you can give her d support she need and also get close to her to know her better..but if she insist and think she can't do that den just leave her and forget about her for now because she might love you but not yet mature to make her own decision... because if she keep staying with them self they can virus her to turn you to ATM while another man keep plucking her mangoes steady..bcuz den don know say u dey press money😂🙄...
But come to think of it, d toto Sweet oooo,..with all your stress na only once den give you opue 😂🙄😂..now den say once debe always debe..

jasent:
Good day, Nairalanders.
Please, I need your honest opinion on this matter.

I met this girl about a year ago when I went to purchase some goods at her workplace. She was really caring and even helped me carry some of the goods to the roadside. When I tried to tip her, she refused.

At that time, I was living in Ivory Coast, so after returning there, I chatted her up and expressed my interest in her. She initially agreed to date me but later changed her mind.

When I later visited Nigeria, she came to see me at my hotel. However, she didn’t allow anything intimate to happen. On several occasions when she visited, each time I made a move, she would walk out without even asking for transport fare. I would always call her back to ask why she acted that way, but her reasons were never clear.

Still, I kept supporting her in my own little way, even though I knew deep down she might never accept me. When I started getting tired of the situation, I told her I was moving on.

At this point, I had already rented an apartment close to the Benin Republic border — I chose that location because the electricity is stable and the rent is paid quarterly, with no agency fees.

Last week, she chatted me up asking if I didn’t want her to visit. I told her I did, but that I’d prefer someone who could spend a few days with me. She agreed to spend two days.

However, on the morning of the day she was supposed to come, she messaged me again, saying she had changed her mind and wouldn’t be sleeping over — but that when she came, I could “ask for anything.” Long story short, she eventually came, and that was the first time we had sex.

Now here’s where the issue starts.

She currently lives with her biological sister and a female friend. When she came, she told me that she, her sister, and their friend wanted to move in with me because they didn’t have money to rent their own place. I actually liked the idea and agreed. I even spoke with her sister about it.

But now, her sister and their friend have changed their minds. They say they prefer to move back to the East rather than come live with me. I even offered to pay three months’ rent for them in a similar apartment here, but they still refused.

Mind you, the reason I wanted them to move closer was so they could find something doing here — unlike their current situation, where they’re broke and dependent. Whenever I send my girlfriend ₦15,000, it barely lasts two days because she’s the one taking care of the rest since they’re not working.

How long can this continue?

Now, my girlfriend isn’t really the problem — her sister and their friend are. They don’t want her to move in with me, and she also can’t make any move without their consent. I’ve now decided not to rent any place for them in Lagos.

Nairalanders, what’s your take on this?

lilvicky68:
In 2025AD?

Or maybe you are in a different time

Bro,I non understand your comment o

Emmy000seun:
Let her make the decision by herself but tell her your plan for her, because it will definitely drain you if your babe is still with them and you send her money they will always share the money with her...so let her understand that the best thing for her is to allow her friend and sister go back to east and she stay with you..then you can give her d support she need and also get close to her to know her better..but if she insist and think she can't do that den just leave her and forget about her for now because she might love you but not yet mature to make her own decision... because if she keep staying with them self they can virus her to turn you to ATM while another man keep plucking her mangoes steady..bcuz den don know say u dey press money😂🙄...
But come to think of it, d toto Sweet oooo,..with all your stress na only once den give you opue 😂🙄😂..now den say once debe always debe..

Thank you

jasent:
Bro,I non understand your comment o

Rent the house for her and furnish it..
You will understand

Buy land and build a house for them

Saybal:
Buy land and build a house for them

Lol see comment
You no build house for your mama na ordnary gf you I build house for you go cry

Firstly how old is she

And my advice is that she just don't want her sister and her friend stranded because she was staying them .if you can rent a room just a room for them and tell the girl that if you rent the room for them you will not allow her stay there with them she will stay with you and you will rent room for her sister just to help she can visit them anytime .
Note: if you rent the room for her don't allow her stay with them or else they will teach her and be collecting money from you time to time becaue they will not want to hustle they will all want to depend on you mr nice guy (Mr the boy is good) na mugu be that . Be wise tell her to live with you and you will rent house for the sister and friend just to use to charity help them

You are sending 15k to her. How much have you sent to your mother?
If your father saw 30k from you, won't he be happy?

That 15k is probably x4 of what your brother slaves for a full month before earning.

Avoid dating poor people.
Avoid dating children of poor people.
Avoid dating friends of poor people.
Avoid dating jobless people.
Avoid dating jobless children of poor people.

You are not UNICEF, you are not WFP. You are not Ministry of Humanitarian Affairs.

Your job is not to feed and take care of poor people.

Sammy101111:
Lol see comment
You no build house for your mama na ordnary gf you I build house for you go cry

He has to build house for the girl and furnish it ,is he not sleeping with the girl

And #5000 is too small for the girl and her sister every 2 days he has to increase it

VillagePipu:
You are sending 15k to her. How much have you sent to your mother?
If your father saw 30k from you, won't he be happy?

That 15k is probably x4 of what your brother slaves for a full month before earning.

Avoid dating poor people.
Avoid dating children of poor people.
Avoid dating friends of poor people.
Avoid dating jobless people.
Avoid dating jobless children of poor people.

You are not UNICEF, you are not WFP. You are not Ministry of Humanitarian Affairs.

Your job is not to feed and take care of poor people.

Avoid poor girls especially the jobless ones.

You go carry load tire.

Guys continue to make this mistake in 2025. You are digging your own financial grave, my friend. Rent her a duplex inugo.

How about you pretend like you've lost it all and your job and let's see if the love will still be there?

Tell her you lost your job or your business has crashed. Keep calling her like you use to.

After 1 week, you will notice a change in her.


Use your head!

jasent:
Good day, Nairalanders.
Please, I need your honest opinion on this matter.

I met this girl about a year ago when I went to purchase some goods at her workplace. She was really caring and even helped me carry some of the goods to the roadside. When I tried to tip her, she refused.

At that time, I was living in Ivory Coast, so after returning there, I chatted her up and expressed my interest in her. She initially agreed to date me but later changed her mind.

When I later visited Nigeria, she came to see me at my hotel. However, she didn’t allow anything intimate to happen. On several occasions when she visited, each time I made a move, she would walk out without even asking for transport fare. I would always call her back to ask why she acted that way, but her reasons were never clear.

Still, I kept supporting her in my own little way, even though I knew deep down she might never accept me. When I started getting tired of the situation, I told her I was moving on.

At this point, I had already rented an apartment close to the Benin Republic border — I chose that location because the electricity is stable and the rent is paid quarterly, with no agency fees.

Last week, she chatted me up asking if I didn’t want her to visit. I told her I did, but that I’d prefer someone who could spend a few days with me. She agreed to spend two days.

However, on the morning of the day she was supposed to come, she messaged me again, saying she had changed her mind and wouldn’t be sleeping over — but that when she came, I could “ask for anything.” Long story short, she eventually came, and that was the first time we had sex.

Now here’s where the issue starts.

She currently lives with her biological sister and a female friend. When she came, she told me that she, her sister, and their friend wanted to move in with me because they didn’t have money to rent their own place. I actually liked the idea and agreed. I even spoke with her sister about it.

But now, her sister and their friend have changed their minds. They say they prefer to move back to the East rather than come live with me. I even offered to pay three months’ rent for them in a similar apartment here, but they still refused.

Mind you, the reason I wanted them to move closer was so they could find something doing here — unlike their current situation, where they’re broke and dependent. Whenever I send my girlfriend ₦15,000, it barely lasts two days because she’s the one taking care of the rest since they’re not working.

How long can this continue?

Now, my girlfriend isn’t really the problem — her sister and their friend are. They don’t want her to move in with me, and she also can’t make any move without their consent. I’ve now decided not to rent any place for them in Lagos.

Nairalanders, what’s your take on this?

E get the kind post you go read in the morning, your mood go just change...

Relationship wey una never even define, u never know wetin no xup, you don't even know her in detail.

Just cuz of one kpekus round u wan commit an abominable financial mistake.

That your guy wey dey beg you money since last year, you don help am??

Oya kneel down, raise your hands and say:

Oh Lord, let me not make a financial mistake that would ruin me

Oh Lord, let me be wise to see things that are bad for my finances

Oh Lord, I'm sorry for having this thought, thank YOU for opening my eyes

Mama gave you kpekus as a leeway for her big billing..
Hope say you use my natural herbs when una wan knack sha….
No go Dey two minute ooo

It's very obvious she only allowed you to have access to her pot of beans simply because of the favour she wanted from you.......

Fear bannies and their tactics and you'll definitely live longer than chief Methuselah himself

She gave you opuah just to work on you and you are giving way for such..

Dry carry responsibility way no be your own cos you collect opuahhh.

The red flags 🚩 are enough to start a carnival but it appears the OP used to work in a circus 🎪 and sees absolutely nothing wrong in the flags being displayed everywhere.

Let me advise you like the experienced man that I am. I suggest you save cost and give her the apartment you are already renting. You can move out and live under the bridge, you are a man so you can survive. A woman needs to be pampered. She will see the sacrifice you made for her and that will earn you her love and loyalty. I usually advise this to people like you and today, they are all enjoying their girlfriends. I stand with you my brother.

This man don finally go chop efor, when they tell u to stay away from fornicating u will say “NO”. Now see how a mature man like ursef is torn between Konji and common sense. #confused entity. 😂😂

Please go ahead and rent the house.
SIMPing is allowed.
Captain Ebuka from Anambra saving the sinking shirt

jasent:
Bro,I non understand your comment o

He is trying to wake you up. A broke girl that didn't really like you. Just came to give you opueh when she needed someone to rent house for her and her sister.

Just know that red flags are all over that your narration.

Spend only what you can afford to lose on that girl. Otherwise, you might regret it later.

Don't try it

Some of you guys are funny, she should move to your apartment on what basis, can you allow your sister to move into a guy's house. If you know you like her, then marry her in order to save your self the heart breaking in future, do you think renting apartment for her without doing the needful will make her loyal to you or keep her.

nnamdi640:
Some of you guys are funny, she should move to your apartment on what basis, can you allow your sister to move into a guy's house. If you know you like her, then marry her in order to save your self the heart breaking in future, do you think renting apartment for her without doing the needful will make her loyal to you or keep her.

You didn't read where i said she suggested it?