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Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? - Romance (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralRomanceWhy Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? (10669 Views)

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Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by bigpriik: 10:41pm On Mar 15
Tekashi89:
bro I've done all these I'm tired of letting go every time none seems to click that's why I think it's something spiritual
broski I don see pass all this ones the problem is you are being rejected and it' lowering your selfesteem,work on you mind and physical appearance, to win Nigerians girls now just look rich and have solid Confidence, you will definitely see one that will fall for you just believe.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by kiddaz: 11:56pm On Mar 15
Tekashi89:
so you mean I should go on with single mothers somebody else's left over
Try to read and understand exactly what I wrote. In life, you either learn to master something or you pretend you're a master and keep failing with no real experiences. The choice is yours bro. I won't bother with you anymore. You can as well fake it or use money like some are suggesting or get the lessons you are meant to get from a few older women and move on correct, armed with a wealth of experience to date up the age ladder or down. Like I said, the choice is yours. You have no knowledge about dating women and you're running away from class. You go continue to fail and repeat tire, you never ready. Or still go give fake spiritual mediums money for goat pepper soupundecided
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by BigEnergy16:
Tekashi89:
that normally works for me I've been with girls that we just flow naturally but once I tell them I like them they become distant
There is something I learnt sha. When you verbally tell someone you like them the game is over because they feel they have won you, it you are at their power. I know it sounds foolish or childish but sadly that's how the psychology works. As someone said you have to vibe instead of telling them.

Also you are too skinny for your height.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by dontrulee: 8:51am On Mar 18
Forget ladies for now, fix your life first.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Hungrychicken(m): 1:56pm On Mar 18
Me at 6’’0 and 60kg was skinny and hungry looking. Thats just puberty in Nigeria anyways. Add some weight, level up your drip and socialize more with girls

One important thing:
NEVER tell a girl you like her. Do everything together but never say the four letter words unless the feeling is mutual.
Relationships these days is mind games. So, be smarter!
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Hungrychicken(m): 2:04pm On Mar 18
BigEnergy16:
There is something I learnt sha. When you verbally tell someone you like them the game is over because they feel they have won you, it you are at their power. I know it sounds foolish or childish but sadly that's how the psychology works. As someone said you have to vibe instead of telling them.

Also you are too short for your weight.
It doesn’t sound foolish nor childish. It’s a universal experience. I got to understand that sooner too, after I made the same mistake. It’s more about mind games these days, than actual love and affections : (
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by BigEnergy16: 7:45pm On Mar 18
Hungrychicken:
Me at 6’’0 and 60kg was skinny and hungry looking. Thats just puberty in Nigeria anyways. Add some weight, level up your drip and socialize more with girls

One important thing:
NEVER tell a girl you like her. Do everything together but never say the four letter words unless the feeling is mutual.
Relationships these days is mind games. So, be smarter!
Yeah bro. Your thoughts align perfectly with mine. You can even spend on her when in person, do anything you want but don't utter that word. To make matters worse some guys even tell girl they like them over text which is worse. If she didn't like you before, now she will see you as a spineless piece of shit.

When you tell someone you like them different 3 things can happen.
1. They outrightly reject you because they are not attracted to and you don't have anything to offer them. (This might be the OP case because 60kg at 180cm is obviously a poverty signal)
2. They accept you even though they don't like you but they see that can benefit from you, money or connection etc
3. They accept because they are attracted to you (This is why the some people can get away with telling the opposite sex they like them).

If you are an objectively attractive person you can get lots of women by just telling them directly you like them and 40-70% of the time it will work.
I found out looks also mattered for women but not to the same level as men. They can over-look your looks if you have something else of benefit.

And women are masters of this game.
This is the same reason women always say they don't like to tell guys they like them directly because aside from the fact that rejection hurts, the guy might not real like them but will still agree to date them because of sex (I am guilty of doing this too).
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Peacecore: 10:46pm On Mar 18
Bendeco02:
So, you expect girls to be toasting you? grin

Normally Nigerian type of dating is different. Most girls stick to guys they benefit financially.

Do you think guys dropping comments for you here have good relationship with women either? grin
grin
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Peacecore: 10:51pm On Mar 18
Tekashi89:
Bro I've spent money chasing different girls do their beddings taking them out, there was one I took out only for me to get home to discover she has blocked me, there was also one that I did transfer for and all the nice things a guy normally does for a girl only for her to end up insulting and blocking me this happened early January this year
Doo! grin
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Hungrychicken(m): 12:38am On Mar 19
BigEnergy16:
Yeah bro. Your thoughts align perfectly with mine. You can even spend on her when in person, do anything you want but don't utter that word. To make matters worse some guys even tell girl they like them over text which is worse. If she didn't like you before, now she will see you as a spineless piece of shit.

When you tell someone you like them different 3 things can happen.
1. They outrightly reject you because they are not attracted to and you don't have anything to offer them. (This might be the OP case because 60kg at 180cm is obviously a poverty signal)
2. They accept you even though they don't like you but they see that can benefit from you, money or connection etc
3. They accept because they are attracted to you (This is why the some people can get away with telling the opposite sex they like them).

If you are an objectively attractive person you can get lots of women by just telling them directly you like them and 40-70% of the time it will work.
I found out looks also mattered for women but not to the same level as men. They can over-look your looks if you have something else of benefit.

And women are masters of this game.
This is the same reason women always say they don't like to tell guys they like them directly because aside from the fact that rejection hurts, the guy might not real like them but will still agree to date them because of sex (I am guilty of doing this too).
You're very right. So, better don’t say that four letter words. It gives them power over you.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Tekashi89(op): 9:18pm On Mar 24
BigEnergy16:
Yeah bro. Your thoughts align perfectly with mine. You can even spend on her when in person, do anything you want but don't utter that word. To make matters worse some guys even tell girl they like them over text which is worse. If she didn't like you before, now she will see you as a spineless piece of shit.

When you tell someone you like them different 3 things can happen.
1. They outrightly reject you because they are not attracted to and you don't have anything to offer them. (This might be the OP case because 60kg at 180cm is obviously a poverty signal)
2. They accept you even though they don't like you but they see that can benefit from you, money or connection etc
3. They accept because they are attracted to you (This is why the some people can get away with telling the opposite sex they like them).

If you are an objectively attractive person you can get lots of women by just telling them directly you like them and 40-70% of the time it will work.
I found out looks also mattered for women but not to the same level as men. They can over-look your looks if you have something else of benefit.

And women are masters of this game.
This is the same reason women always say they don't like to tell guys they like them directly because aside from the fact that rejection hurts, the guy might not real like them but will still agree to date them because of sex (I am guilty of doing this too).
alright bro I've read who you've said I'll try and apply them to my day to day life
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by EvilMerodack(m): 2:38pm On Mar 25
Bendeco02:
Do you think guys dropping comments for you here have good relationship with women either? grin
So, all of them dey gather struggle cheesy
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Uchenna10(m): 8:02am On Mar 26
I experience this same tin bro
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Uchenna10(m): 8:09am On Mar 26
OP,let's talk privately on tëlegram,I'm going thru the same tin.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Uchenna10(m): 8:10am On Mar 26
bigpriik:
broski I don see pass all this ones the problem is you are being rejected and it' lowering your selfesteem,work on you mind and physical appearance, to win Nigerians girls now just look rich and have solid Confidence, you will definitely see one that will fall for you just believe.
My guy looks dirty and rough,he doesn't wash, neither does he have swag,but he bags girls...tho he simps alot
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Bendeco02: 10:21am On Mar 26
EvilMerodack:
So, all of them dey gather struggle cheesy
Yes na grin
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Tekashi89(op): 10:54am On May 01
Uchenna10:
OP,let's talk privately on tëlegram,I'm going thru the same tin.
okay drop your telegram handle
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Uchenna10(m): 9:53pm On May 01
Tekashi89:
okay drop your telegram handle
@DURK_90
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by PinkNature(m): 7:09am On May 02
bigpriik:
It happens to all guys not just you but they don't talk about it much nothing spiritual about it. when they tell you that gender in complicated you think it's a joke abi? grin
what you don't know is that by default when you ask a girl out her normal reaction is to start playing hard to get, [b]she will want to prove to you she is not cheap so she will test the hell out of you [/b]this is where most guys quit.
I will advice you not to be desperate she is testing your confidence to see if you are man enough to handle pressure, let women play their mind games, keep toasting her for at least 2weeks then pull out if she is not reciprocating,If she has fallen for you she will come back for you.
she’s playing hard to get because she doesn’t really like you that well and also because she’s already got her heart else where
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by PinkNature(m): 7:10am On May 02
Adasun:
may God help him, gyming gets me Hot AF
esp leg days 🫠
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by PinkNature(m): 7:12am On May 02
Tekashi89:
Hey guys, my dating life sulks, I haven't been really lucky with girls ever since my secondary School days. Since I was born I've only dated two girls and that was way back in 2016 and last year in 2025.
I tend to attract more guys, single mothers or older women (very old women tend to like me).
I don't know what's it with me that tends to push away younger girls (note I'm 180cm 60kg) light skin most people say I'm handsome. But I don't know why I can't attract young single girls.
Where ever I go I tend to attract only single mothers and when a young girl even start getting attracted to me I'll later discover that she acts that way to every other guy around so there's nothing special about me.
I'm thinking of going spiritual but I just thought I should post it here first.
So guys I need your advice on this issue pls
tbh if you’re tall, girls seem to assume you’re a player and won’t want to take you seriously but regardless, you should still be able to bag young girls.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by essentialone(m): 7:26am On May 02
Some vvomen will be in a relationship or marriage and be itching to go back to the streets so b@dly.

‎While they are there with the man, they are waiting for one thing to go vvr0ng, it could be something as simple as her man missing her call, she will pack up her bags and dash back to the streets.

‎They will make up scenarios in their heads that never happened, just to convince themselves that leaving the man was their best option.

‎That's why, when the man is trying to figure out what the pr0blem is and work things out, she is resisting. What he doesn't know is that she was going to leave him anyway, he didn't have to do anything to make her leave.

‎He could be the perfect man for her and she would still leave because he is too perfect.

‎Kaka's vvife left him, not because he çhéátéd or m!$treated her, her only reason was that he was too NICE.

‎You'd hear some vvomen on various podcasts talking about how they left a good man who happens to be the kindest, considerate man that they had ever met but she left him anyway because she needed to find herself.

‎That's OS behavior !

‎And sometimes, how quick these vvomen are able to get back to the streets proves that they weren't loyal in the relationship, to begin with. They were never inside, they have been outside the whole time!

‎Some vvomen want to prove it so b@d that all men are the same that they don't mind sabotaging their own happiness.

‎This is why, a small inconvenience is enough for them to leave. Which is sad for the man cause he thought he was in love , unbeknownst to him, he l0st battle even before it started.

From the streets she came and unto the streets she shall return.

Ladies and patterns are always matched.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Bendeco02:
PinkNature:
tbh if you’re tall, girls seem to assume you’re a player and won’t want to take you seriously but regardless, you should still be able to bag young girls.
Oga that's your mindset.

Nothing like play boy for being tall.

What makes girls sees a guy as a player is his energy and game.

Good looking, confidence and game pattern is what girls fear in a man to start seeing him as play boy.

So far you're not short, height don't matter much in real life.

You think girls will follow you just because you're tall? undecided And tall boys full online hunting for babe.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by lovediehatelive(m): 2:11pm On May 03
Tekashi89:
Bro I've spent money chasing different girls do their beddings taking them out, there was one I took out only for me to get home to discover she has blocked me, there was also one that I did transfer for and all the nice things a guy normally does for a girl only for her to end up insulting and blocking me this happened early January this year
Try hurting them.


Try saying no and don't give a ffck


It's difficult at first but it does work.

Try hurt their feelings and say no to their wants


I'm talking from experience.

The ones I act nicely towards usually take me for a fool and cut me off.

But the ones I hurt and deny their request always try to get me.

Try teraban or so on YouTube. Psychehack or so.

His videos have value
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by udede(m): 2:55pm On May 03
Most advise that people gave you up there are good but check if you have mouth or body odour.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by NwaliE01: 10:40am On May 04
Then, stop telling them
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by enemyofprogress: 11:17am On May 04
Op please check your mouth and body odours.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Sanctecosma(m): 11:18am On May 04
No matter how much you like a woman, the fastest way to kill her attraction for you is revealing it to her.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by Breaker001: 11:20am On May 04
Go for the single mothers, if they are the ones that like you and respect you 😅
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by OpSystem(m): 11:21am On May 04
Tekashi89:
Hey guys, my dating life sulks, I haven't been really lucky with girls ever since my secondary School days. Since I was born I've only dated two girls and that was way back in 2016 and last year in 2025.

I tend to attract more guys, single mothers or older women (very old women tend to like me).
I don't know what's it with me that tends to push away younger girls (note I'm 180cm 60kg) light skin most people say I'm handsome. But I don't know why I can't attract young single girls.

Where ever I go I tend to attract only single mothers and when a young girl even start getting attracted to me I'll later discover that she acts that way to every other guy around so there's nothing special about me.

I'm thinking of going spiritual but I just thought I should post it here first.

So guys I need your advice on this issue pls
I was once in in your shoe, what you need to do is to work on yourself, build yourself financially, in skill and knowledge.

Forget getting attentions from those genders, it won't help your life.
Re: Why Is It That Once I Tell A Lady I Like Her She Instantly Starts Pulling Away? by doncartel: 11:22am On May 04
There’s a charm I will give you. Just whisper the girl’s name whether it is ‘Beyoncé’ or ‘Cardi B’ or ‘Tiwa’, they will come to you.
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