OP na true you talk jawe ... Respect is resipocal

Ori ko ju ori lo ....... As we born slave ... We born Prince like dah

#Greetings

Rapzino:
My mum raised all four of her sons alone, ever since our dad passed away in 1998. You can misbehave in the daytime, but be ready for her koboko @4a.m; she won't wake you but her cane will. There is no dish we can't prepare, hehehe it was hard for us getting girlfriends then. Now we understand and love her, she's the best!

God bless your mum.

Had 3 different canes when I was a kid. The offence committed determines which one will be used. Thank God for that because it made me stronger.

Me: *nearTears** Dad, i had 3/3... 80 persons were withdrawn out of 190...

Dad: why didn't you have distintion??

Me:
....story of My Life... that is how he has always been with me... he has created an over-achiever

Hahahahaahehehehehehohohohohoho.
Nja parents exhibit their care with strict measures.
I remembered, my dad's favourite proverb "spear the rod and spoil the child" chai, "my body hear am ooo"
No kind of koboko my body didn't tasted,ranging from 1 mouth,2 mouth and 3 mouth.
I was so stubborn that my dad out of frustration used a hot pressing iron on me.Up till now,d marks are still visible.

I remembered, a day when my dad and I was working on our generator,one of the electrical part of the gen was exposed.
Me: daddy,no touch that side.
My dad:shut up,wetin you know.
As my dad touched it, he vibrated for some seconds.
Chai,na so I just dey laff am for inside my mind.
Nja parents rocks jor.

its funny how most Africans can resonate with these kinds of parents not just Nigerians...
Ghanaians can also attest to this

its funny how we Africans claim to train children best yet generations grow to be the most corrupt and dirty ever whiles European societies relatively grow better and cleaner despite not going thru this rigorous stuff

so ironical.....

When I was a kid I travelled to the village,and when some group of elders where having a meeting I sat in a corner and was listening,suddenly an old man beside me gave a loud fart to my greatest surprise he accused me and slapped me on the back.i fought back by saying he is the one that did it of which everyone knew.the end of the mate was that my mum did not bring us up well.my brother the next day I couldn't sit on my bumbum

When I was a kid I travelled to the village,and when some group of elders where having a meeting I sat in a corner and was listening,suddenly an old man beside me gave a loud fart to my greatest surprise he accused me and slapped me on the back.i fought back by saying he is the one that did it of which everyone knew.the end of the mate was that my mum did not bring us up well.my brother the next day I couldn't sit on my bumbumw

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my mum: Uzoamaka do you have a boyfriend?
me: no
2 months ltr
mum: do you have a boyfriend?
Me: no
1 week ltr
Mum: do you have a boyfriend
Me: no
3 days ltr
Mum: do you have a boyfriend?
Me: yes
Mum: *pulls my ear* let me tell you something Aids is real,that your boyfriend may have Aids,do you hear me?
Me:speechless

that's the story of my sex education

r33d:


God bless your mum.

amen and thank you bro

IbokUtoroh:










gBES

Ki o dobale!
Gbes!
Ki o fo soke!
Last Bullet
Aiit!
Stand well!
Gbes!
Go down low!

nanajec:
its funny how most Africans can resonate with these kinds of parents not just Nigerians...
Ghanaians can also attest to this

its funny how we Africans claim to train children best yet generations grow to be the most corrupt and dirty ever whiles European societies relatively grow better and cleaner despite not going thru this rigorous stuff

so ironical.....

True...very ironic. Food for thought.

One day i made eba for my Dad and i added so much water so it was really soft
Dad: Uzoamaka,come here?
wash your hand
After washing my hand he took it and dipped it into the eba
Dad: what is it?
Me:i made it really soft
Dad: don't come back to his house from your husband's house to tell me "Daddy he doesn't love me anymore".
lol.

daddy:chika!!!Chika!!!Chika!!!Chika
me:daddy iam coming
daddy:ha!i am calling you and you telling me you are coming.my friend will you come here!!!!!
can u imagine am in my mid twenties oh,i shocked that day.
i love my parents to the moon and back.

Nigerian mothers are stricter than the average health inspector. Lol,interesting

When such a child accepts things in a good way,it will help the situation. In future,you may come to like all of your parents antics if it affects you postively.

Chai, I do almost all these to my kids oo and I said I wouldn't train my kids the way my parents trained me but I don't flog sha, I spank. Na Dem papa dey trash them mercilessly when they misbehave.

I will never ask an outsider to beat my kids o, my father once, after flogging my lil bro seriously at home, told his teacher in school to continue cos he had to catch a flight out of the country. My brother fainted that day, and they rushed him to my mom. From where my dad travelled to, he kept calling and asking how my brother was doing, he felt bad but he never apologized!

caught a glimpse of my fathers report card one time, na 9th I see o, but everytime he will be saying he always came first.

anyway my lil daughter can greet well sha, she greets everyone including strangers when walking on the street, haba! I have told her to limit the greeting only to people in the house or anyone she sees me greet.

1.When Mummy sends you on an Errand and You dare Frown, she goes "You are all Ingrates in this Family, Iya Monsuru's Children will ALWAYS BEG for Chores to carry out for their Mummy, always fighting themselves to be the First to do the Chores" (Jeez! I'm yet to see such a Perfect Child)

2. My Mum was a "Consultant General Practitioner"!
The Smell of your Stool is enough for you to be subjected to a 3 Day Herbal Therapy(Agbo) to "clean your Spoilt Stomach!" Refusal to Eat is ofcourse "Confirmed Malaria!"
Even when I finished Med Sch and Criticized her Treatment Regimen, she went "It was this Treatment I gave you from childhood till you went to this your Dokita School and it didn't kill you, now you know more than me abi?" Hence even as a Doctor, I dare not antagonize her "Malaria" diagnosis and take her medication without a fuss to this day!

3. Daddy will NEVER compliment you on a good Result, yet ALL THE NEIGHBOURS, RELATIVES, FAMILY FRIENDS keep telling you how Proud your Dad is of your Results!

4. You fail any Exam (JAMB, WAEC etc) and you are caught watching TV (My God, You are finished !!!)

5.You have a Female Visitor, Mum comes to Sit in the Living Room with You and keeps quiet staring at you both!

6. You find a Girl to marry, Mum dishes out Thousands of Naira(despite complaining of no Money) to Various "Rapid Reconnaisance Squad" Village Aunties who embark on extensive Intelligence gathering over Long Distances looking out for family History of divorce, mental illness, infidelity, etc! on your Fiancee's side. Only an "ALL CLEAR" from them can get the gears rolling!

7. My Father was always "Generous, Kind, Funny,Warm" to all other Kids EXCEPT his Own!

Nigerian Parents are the most Charming Slave Drivers in the World!

vikel2104:
When your father calls you 'my friend' it is not good

Lol. He woon change am for you bi dat.
If you break a plate ahhh you are done..naija parents
If I look gal too much,na slap I go chop.
If while watching a movie and they start kissing na too fast forward o if not the will carry the player n lock it up till further notice.lol

kuuljay:
When I was a kid I travelled to the village,and when some group of elders where having a meeting I sat in a corner and was listening,suddenly an old man beside me gave a loud fart to my greatest surprise he accused me and slapped me on the back.i fought back by saying he is the one that did it of which everyone knew.the end of the mate was that my mum did not bring us up well.my brother the next day I couldn't sit on my bumbum

what the hell where you thinking? sit behind a fat elderly man? they fart "fartuitiously" (permit me to use that word.) never make that mistake again bro

IdomaLikita : Quote Post 1.When Mummy sends you on an
Errand and You dare Frown, she goes
"You are all Ingrates in this Family, Iya
Monsuru's Children will ALWAYS BEG for
Chores to carry out for their Mummy,
always fighting themselves to be the First to do the Chores" (Jeez! I'm yet
to see such a Perfect Child) 2. My Mum was a "Consultant General
Practitioner"!
The Smell of your Stool is enough for
you to be subjected to a 3 Day Herbal
Therapy(Agbo) to "clean your Spoilt
Stomach!" Refusal to Eat is ofcourse "Confirmed Malaria!"
Even when I finished Med Sch and
Criticized her Treatment Regimen, she
went "It was this Treatment I gave you
from childhood till you went to this
your Dokita School and it didn't kill you, now you know more than me abi?"
Hence even as a Doctor, I dare not
antagonize her "Malaria" diagnosis and
take her medication without a fuss to
this day! 3. Daddy will NEVER compliment you on
a good Result, yet ALL THE
NEIGHBOURS, RELATIVES, FAMILY
FRIENDS keep telling you how Proud
your Dad is of your Results! 4. You fail any Exam (JAMB, WAEC etc)
and you are caught watching TV (My
God, You are finished !!!) 5.You have a Female Visitor, Mum
comes to Sit in the Living Room with
You and keeps quiet staring at you
both! 6. You find a Girl to marry, Mum dishes
out Thousands of Naira(despite
complaining of no Money) to Various
"Rapid Reconnaisance Squad" Village
Aunties who embark on extensive
Intelligence gathering over Long Distances looking out for family History
of divorce, mental illness, infidelity,
etc! on your Fiancee's side. Only an
"ALL CLEAR" from them can get the
gears rolling! 7. My Father was always "Generous,
Kind, Funny,Warm" to all other Kids
EXCEPT his Own! Nigerian Parents are the most
Charming Slave Drivers in the World!

If my mom lays her hands on you ,you'll begin to wonder if you were adopted.Even as an adult she can't just resist spanking me on the back if I misfire and when I pretended it wasn't painful the old lady will grab my arm and bite me just to get even

My Dad will only use one proverb to destroy your day.

Sometimes I look at them as age catches up with them and I feel so bad especially when they complain about being weak and body aches .I know they love me and wouldn't want me making mistakes hence the military drilling to instil self control,respect ,fear and self contentment.
Woe betides you if you dare take a gift from a stranger without seeking for their unspoken but silent approval or disapproval by looking into their eyes while they pass that silent and subtle coded message.
But I can clearly remember my Dad telling me not to allow anyone to bully me into submission and he clearly told me to fight for myself and not to come back home crying to them to do my fighting and I when ask him what I should do if the aggressor is stronger and bigger and he clearly ask me to use my teeth
Omo! When I bite two to three kids for the neighborhood with bitter parents coming to our house for a showdown,na so the man advice me to limit my biting to certain peeps.

Nigerian parents will beat you back to normalcy if you think that abnormalities are fun.

and my dad will call u from the innermost of rooms just to give him the television remote on the center table!

u offend during the day and receive the punishment 2:30 am when you are in dream land!

they threaten you with curse! and for our mind we be like... curse if u wan curse! I don't believe in curse and wat I don't believe in can't work in me!

Lol....i dint even know "milo" was a hot chocolate. Tot hot chocolate was all dem janded tins e.g milk shakes. Nairaland can quite educative.

i remember failing english in high school, maybe js1 or 2 and i got home and my dad said, "how come you failed english?" and I said "Only one person passed it; we all failed". Oh, my. come and see vexing. "what kind of nonsense is that? The boy that passed it, does he have two heads?" After chopping beating tire on top 'red' (failures) in my report sheet, omo, na tippex sure pass o.

i go don buy am down before the day wey we dey vacate. lol.

The most annoying part of doing poorly in school apart from the beating was that whenever his friend comes to visit, he'll say "oya, go and bring your report card and come and show your uncle. He is getting zero in school (odo lo ngba ni school)"

back I then I remember when I do wrong and my mum will wait till midnite to flog me so nobody would interrupt her and I can't run away.
also wen I used to play ball and tell my friends to stay close to the gate and tell me whenever she's coming..
it was fun though, the running and all.... but I thank her for making me who I am today....

dis is a hype-hilarious post characterized wit sincerity;great respect to my lovely parent:u can nt celebrate a gud meal in my house,my dad wil ask u why u are hapi,God helpn u,u might be flog 4 dt.u can go and play wit frnds,it is equvalent to missing ur dinner.u must finish ur home chore b4 u can eat. U cant collect food frm neighbour without first looking at mum or dad,if u do u lose both neighbour food and mum's food,in additn caning and lambastement follows.even wen u are reading my dad will stil say"oo kawe eee,olodo"no mata ur positn u are an olodo" to my dad. I lov my parent,they are d best.thanks my late dad,i will 4 ever appreciate being ur child.