i got a new job through someone i just met. it was 4 days ago, i make photocopies of my CV and was summiting round some companies and offices. lucky for me i walked in somewhere while talking to the security man at the gate, the manager came out, called me and we got talking. he said he just like me immediately he saw me. that am going to be his wife. that i should leave all my boyfriends and get serious with him. i was just looking and smiling. so after all the talked, he went through my CV and ask me to go to one organization and summit. so i went. lucky for me again i went straight to the place and was able to see the manager. after much conversation, she employed me immediately. although i did not tell the manager someone directed me there. that was how she took me to HR. and i was asked to resumed the following day.
I've resumed and i appreciate God and the first manager guy who directed me to this job.
the problem now is, he called me yesterday to come and spend the night in his house after work. he desperately want sex and i dont want to sound rude or ungrateful and at the same time i hate such nonsense.
Sis in the house, how do you handle such without looking ungrateful?
men in the house, how do you think i should treat this guy?
He calls me like mad with all manner of stu.pid love names. getting me angry but i want to be polite.

Tell him no.

Oh .....and stay away from him too.

Your topic is misleading.

The man already told you of his intentions the moment he met you. Heck, maybe you were the reason he came out of his office to see what this pretty damsel wanted. Now he is being direct and pressuring you, its not as if he was the one who gave you the job or you work in his organisation or that he is trying to blackmail you.


Do what you ladies do best. Let him down the way you have let down other toasters you didn't like.

Abi, or is there something else?

Be polite but UPFRONT. Make him understand that there is no way you will sleep with him.

Men like him make me angry.

All these girls go dey form anger...

5minsmadness:
Your topic is misleading.

The man already told you of his intentions the moment he met you. Heck, maybe you were the reason he came out of his office to see what this pretty damsel wanted. Now he is being direct and pressuring you, its not as if he was the one who gave you the job or you work in his organisation or that he is trying to blackmail you.


Do what you ladies do best. Let him down the way you have let down other toasters you didn't like.

Abi, or is there something else?

Nothing else. just met him 4days ago. thanks

carefreewannabe:
Be polite but UPFRONT. Make him understand that there is no way you will sleep with him.

Men like him make me angry.

thanks sis. i've even told him am in a serious relationship, but he's not hearing me.

yorex2011:
All these girls go dey form anger...

form anger? not at all.

Have sex with him and chop his money

shelter4luving:
form anger? not at all.

Anyways.. The way he referred you.. Refer him to one cheap olosho joint and tell him to speak with the manager there...

shelter4luving:
thanks sis. i've even told him am in a serious relationship, but he's not hearing me.

Change your number.

courtesy is reciprocal.
A man that has respect for himself won't go about this the way he is, if at all.
me thinks you've been polite enough.
Tell him to stick his raging hard on where d Sun don't shine (not yours obviously) and leave u alone to concentrate on ur New job.

some legs u cut without hesitation n consideration.





am basing dis on the assumption you hadn't played along wen u met in order for his help...in which case, ur oyo.

@OP

It is unfortunate that you want to eat your cake and still have it . I loathe pretenders . The truth is that you owe obligation to the said manager that directed you to the organization where your bread is now temporarily buttered . From now onward , never enter into an agreement formally/informally on anything you are not sure of fulfilling in the long run . Always be diplomatic when doing so , by immediately creating a clause that can guarantee you blameless exit route should you find it inconvenient to pally along in such association . It's always better to be on the offensive side of the world that to be of the defensive side ... This is one secret of long life .

Your silence when he laid down his condition(s) equaled to affirmation to his given terms to you , thus his assumed right of ownership of committed relationship with you now . Should you insist in reneging from the agreement you had with him without finding a way to placate him , then you have got every reason to be afraid of your life and job . Except if he has a heart of gold to forgive and not forgetting of course .

My advice to you should be to try by all means possible to have a meet with him , in an open place of course . Try to bear your mind to him and let him know that you are very grateful for his kindness toward you and that you would ever remain grateful to him . However , that you have scrutinized his request for relationship with you , but that in all sincerity you don't have same feelings for him as he had for you . But wait , if you are not married and still searching , and the guy in question possesses some good traits you would consider in a man for marriage , while not give him a chance to date him , not minding how blunt he was in his approach . Never say never . You can date him without allowing him to shine your " kpomo " .

Allow him chance for date with you . Within the first week of dating him , try to be sensitive whenever you are with him , in the process should you observe any ill-character he posses that you won't tolerate from a potential suitor , then you should use such as " banana peel " , to terminate your relationship with him . In summary , never push away someone that does good of this magnitude to you , without giving him/her justifiable reason for doing so , else you would be putting your life and future in line for bad things .

^^You must be kidding.

Shelter4luving, don't you date this man under no circumstance. You don't owe him anything.

yorex2011:
All these girls go dey form anger...

5minsmadness:
Your topic is misleading.

The man already told you of his intentions the moment he met you. Heck, maybe you were the reason he came out of his office to see what this pretty damsel wanted. Now he is being direct and pressuring you, its not as if he was the one who gave you the job or you work in his organisation or that he is trying to blackmail you.


Do what you ladies do best. Let him down the way you have let down other toasters you didn't like.

Abi, or is there something else?

I wonder oO if com 2 ma house means com let me bleep u. Smh
@Op. Read d above comment again.

shelter4luving:
i got a new job through someone i just met. it was 4 days ago, i make photocopies of my CV and was summiting round some companies and offices. lucky for me i walked in somewhere while talking to the security man at the gate, the manager came out, called me and we got talking. he said he just like me immediately he saw me. that am going to be his wife. that i should leave all my boyfriends and get serious with him. i was just looking and smiling. so after all the talked, he went through my CV and ask me to go to one organization and summit. so i went. lucky for me again i went straight to the place and was able to see the manager. after much conversation, she employed me immediately. although i did not tell the manager someone directed me there. that was how she took me to HR. and i was asked to resumed the following day.
I've resumed and i appreciate God and the first manager guy who directed me to this job.
the problem now is, he called me yesterday to come and spend the night in his house after work. he desperately want sex and i dont want to sound rude or ungrateful and at the same time i hate such nonsense.
Sis in the house, how do you handle such without looking ungrateful?
men in the house, how do you think i should treat this guy?
He calls me like mad with all manner of stu.pid love names. getting me angry but i want to be polite.

This is the point at which you should have walked away, but you stood there smiling.
You gave him your phone number and you proceeded to go to an interview that he told you about
What exactly were you expecting to happen afterwards dare I ask?

If I were you, I will start looking for another job, because this man may decide not to leave you alone or may even find ways to get you fired
Not everyone who does favours doesnt expect something in return . . sadly thats some people for you
You may also need to change your number

There is a saying, dont smell what you wont eat
Next time when a man starts sniffing round you, curtly tell him that you have come looking for a job and not a relationship/sexx and walk away.
Worst case scenario, he will tell you to get out of his office . . .abi shotan, thats the worst they can do.
Gods blessings dont come with wahaha and stress.

Let your No be No and stand by it.

@empero1 its not enough for her to fear for her life and job abeg. Haba.

Op its just 4days like you said. Give it time and he will cool down. I don't think its a good idea to go out with him at all so you don give him unnecessary hope.


Unless of course you like him? Is it possible that you guys would have actually clicked if not for the awkward ways u met? Maybe you don't want to have a relationship so he doesn't use this job stuff as a kind of IOU?

If that is the case then it is complicated. I would still say stay away from the guy unless you don't mind a roll in the hay with him cos he would definitely bring it up when the time comes and it would actually seem ungrateful of you somehow although you would be morally right if you refuse.


Anyway sha. Its still your choice.

,

Op, you're funny o when he was telling you how he liked you and stuff, you were smiling like a chesire cat because you wanted a job. At that point you should've have told him point blank that you aint interested or leave and don't come back.

Your initial silence and smile gave him the green card. Now you went along with his plan and with his help got a job, dude is calling you to reciprocate, na now you sabi talk abi.

shelter4luving:
Thank you all for your contributions.
well, when i said i was smiling. i do not mean anything serious. i was just be nice. and i wasn't nice because i wanted anything from him. i didnt even know him as the manager then.
as for the job i got, i didnt go there in his name. as a matter of fact, i went there to try my luck. i was even ask if someone directed me and i said no one. the manager told me she like my confidence, the manner of approach and boldness.
@sir Empero, i do not enter any contract relationship with this man pls. u sound as if am defrauding him.

lol stop trying to justify yourself, you wouldn't have known about the place had he not informed you and besides he might've called them to let them know about you.

My point is you encouraged it by 'smiling' , giving him your contact details and of course the almighty silence.

shelter4luving:
Thank you all for your contributions.
well, when i said i was smiling. i do not mean anything serious. i was just be nice. and i wasn't nice because i wanted anything from him. i didnt even know him as the manager then.
as for the job i got, i didnt go there in his name. as a matter of fact, i went there to try my luck. i was even ask if someone directed me and i said no one. the manager told me she like my confidence, the manner of approach and boldness.
@sir Empero, i do not enter any contract relationship with this man pls. u sound as if am defrauding him.

Listen to yourself go, are you a child?
Or have you been living in a cave and just got released into the world?


You typed this, didn't you?

lucky for me i walked in somewhere while talking to the security man at the gate, the manager came out, called me and we got talking. he said he just like me immediately he saw me. that am going to be his wife. that i should leave all my boyfriends and get serious with him. i was just looking and smiling. so after all the talked, he went through my CV and ask me to go to one organization and summit. so i went.

So when all of this was happening, what exactly was going on in your mind?
Even a 16year old will sense that the man was coming on to you and making passes.

It's either you're naturally naive due to lack of exposure, or just faking it to gain sympathy.

I have a feeling your intent was just to start a thread...

Is it not better you give d pomo to someone who added value to ur life than one stupid NFA dat has added nothing to u and will still dump u at the end of d day .

carefreewannabe:
^^You must be kidding.

Shelter4luving, don't you date this man under no circumstance. You don't owe him anything.

This.

Don't go anywhere with him.

Don't date him.

Stop picking his calls or change your number.

But prepare your mind to lose the job.

You're dealing with a predator here (who's probably 'happily married' too). He will likely try to get you fired if you don't give in but you shouldn't do it. That would be akin to prostitution.

You shouldn't have given him your phone number though after what he told you. Or did he take it from your cv himself?

hmmmmmmmm @crackhaus. you try.

OP, clean your lips, the bunkum you're spewing has stained them. He's not asking for sexx as appreciation, he wanted to sleep with you before you got that job, a job he helped you get, by the way.

He did you a favour in the hopes of falling in your good graces, apparently, he's made a wrong investment.

Instead of acting all "offended" at his advances which, by the way, are par for the course, you should call him and tell him point blank that you're not interested in coming to his house and thank him for his help. If you lose the job as a result move on, however, if you don't want to lose the job you know what to do.

@carefreewanabe, @dbard, @ charcover, @mintayo, @sminsmadness and @ilebatojo. Thank you so much. i got your points.

.

shelter4luving:
hmmmmmmmm @crackhaus. you try.

I know, I'm nice like that.

5minsmadness:
Your topic is misleading.

The man already told you of his intentions the moment he met you. Heck, maybe you were the reason he came out of his office to see what this pretty damsel wanted. Now he is being direct and pressuring you, its not as if he was the one who gave you the job or you work in his organisation or that he is trying to blackmail you.


Do what you ladies do best. Let him down the way you have let down other toasters you didn't like.

Abi, or is there something else?

Don't mind her.

Yeye dey smell.

Why was she smiling and leading him on? Nothing goes for nothing in that godforsaken hell hole of a country. Someone you hardly know gives you a job literally on the spot without doing any background checks and / or references?

Pretenders everywhere.

shelter4luving:
Thanks. he can not fire me. he is not the person that employ me either. he only heard of a vacancy somewhere and told me to go and summit my cv. just that am grateful to him and i dont want to be rude.

Then this thread isn't necessary.