₦airaland Forum

Nneka123:
Okay.

So you're 23 and you fear you will never get married because of all the things you listed? How about i tell you that you are worrying over the issue quite early. I mean do you want to get married now?

You may be right...i guess each time i meet a guy and things fall apart it makes me worry..

and no not now, but maybe like 25/27, if i want to be married by 27 then i should at least be dating someone by 23-25, i cant imagine marrying someone i haven't dated for a few years.

and it's more so because i've never had a serious relationship.

but yes i'm probably worrying for no reason

Arami92:
what does"achikota ekwee onu" mean?

U re not igbo? Ask an igbo friend around u, they will explain better.
























Sorry I will not tell u.I just do it in almost all my posts, so dat none igbo person, will always ask the igbo people around dem for d meaning ,thus, learning one or two igbo words.

Arami92:
You may be right...i guess each time i meet a guy and things fall apart it makes me worry..

and no not now, but maybe like 25/27, if i want to be married by 27 then i should at least be dating someone by 23-25, i cant imagine marrying someone i haven't dated for a few years.

and it's more so because i've never had a serious relationship.

but yes i'm probably worrying for no reason

Exactly! You're worrying for no reason. The fact that you think that you're not approachable by some guys, another guy won't think that way, or that you're a virgin another guy will appreciate and wait till you're ready.

So i think you should let your ego down for the next guy that will come your way, don't let your beauty get in your head. Try to let your guard down, it might actually help.

Arami,
Can u differentiate btw pride $ arrogance?

For u to av identified ur weaknesses, it is a gud start. No guy wld like to be wit a lady dat nags, a lady dat is proud, a lady dat feels she knws too much, a lady dat is heady or wit a sense of superiority no matter how beautiful u are.If a guy shows more attention wit all dat, jst bliv it is because he is yet to meet anoda lady.

About being a virgin, forget woteva has been d trend among ladies nowadays trading dis punny for love. Love $ sex are two different feelings.Giving a guy sex doesn't mak u special neither will he carry u for head like burger. Just maintain ur self worth nd patiently wait for a man dat is gonna appreciate ur standard afta u must av worked on ur weaknesses.

At age 23, I fink u shld av less worries abt how som dudes av bhaved to u or handled relationship wit u buh concentrate on how to b a better woman wen dat man eventually surface. *prior proper preparation prevents poor performance*

Lastly, commit ur future into God's hand

First off, you're pretty no doubt. I think because you're not in Nigeria, you should try to date other people that are not Nigerians.

There are psyco oyibos but there are good ones too. Don't limit yourself to your country peeps.

Also, make more female friends, yeah I know you can't stand girls and their drama but the dude pals can't be there all the time. Hang with the girls, go out with them that way, you'll be coevering more ground in a short time .

Thirdly, be yourself, don't go all wild and crazy, if you're Christian, go to church more, do other activities with the youth in the church, if you're in school, join the rally, and so on.

Bottom line, you need more people around you. You can meet even more people by getting invites and so on or someone can recommend you.

Arami92:
me

You look like a million dollars but your problem is BIBLICAL.

Hang on Bae.That one guy that will blow your mind off is on his way.

Olami90:
Arami,
Can u differentiate btw pride $ arrogance?

For u to av identified ur weaknesses, it is a gud start. No guy wld like to be wit a lady dat nags, a lady dat is proud or a lady dat feels she knws too much or a sense of superiority no matter how beautiful u are.If a guy shows more attention wit all dat, jst bliv it is because he is yet to meet anoda lady.

Thank you, ummm...

I think pride is taking pride in who you are, not being desperate for attention or just not turning yourself into a doormat for people. You can be proud of who you are without thinking you are better than other people. Value yourself and others equally. I don't think i'm better than anybody.
I know some girls that have this stuck up, mean girl attitude..i'm not like that. when guys approach me, even if i'm not interested i'm never rude or mean.

I think arrogance is a false sense of pride, where in elevating yourself you also try and bring other people down. i see arrogant girls as the ones who i always looking for BIG guys with money, and walk around pretending to be more than what they are. The expect people to fall at thier feet and etc..

um, also..How do i communicate frustration without nagging?

and how am i to be humble without letting men take advantage of me?

As a woman how do you protect yourself from being hurt but still leave yourself open for the right person??

Everyman that enters my life doesn't have good intentions, so my pride and my distancing myself is to see how serious this guy is about me? It's like i'm a really nice person but i feel like i have to have this tough exterior or people will just be abusing you. i see how men lie, cheat,and abuse women and that scares me.

Adaeze003:
First off, you're pretty no doubt. I think because you're not in Nigeria, you should try to date other people that are not Nigerians.

There are psyco oyibos but there are good ones too. Don't limit yourself to your country peeps.

Also, make more female friends, yeah I know you can't stand girls and their drama but the dude pals can't be there all the time. Hang with the girls, go out with them that way, you'll be coevering more great in a short time .

Thirdly, be yourself, don't go all wild and crazy, if you're Christian, go to church more, do other activities with the youth in the church, if you're in school, join the rally, and so on.

Bottom line, you need more people around you. You can meet even more people by getting invites and so on or someone can recommend you.

Thank you, that was very encouraging. lIDK about dating oyibos though :/
lol i'll try sha

Survivor33:
You look like a million dollars but your problem is BIBLICAL.

what do you mean?

Check my modified post.

..

dear..its normal just keep calm...d person who ..loves u...trust u...will come for u..no matter its a sex free relationship...such people exist... keep your virginity for that person...d only person u Will spend your...life with..your life partner .

Arami92:
You may be right...i guess each time i meet a guy and things fall apart it makes me worry..

and no not now, but maybe like 25/27, if i want to be married by 27 then i should at least be dating someone by 23-25, i cant imagine marrying someone i haven't dated for a few years.

and it's more so because i've never had a serious relationship.

but yes i'm probably worrying for no reason

And where did u get dat idea from dat dating ur potential hubby for yrs is wot wld giv u d kind of marriage u av dreamt of(a happy one for dat matter)

If care is not taken, u will fall flat.

B flexible in ur decisions. Not everyfin will go as u expect in life, there are tyms u nid to drop expectations.

Olami90:
And where did u get dat idea from dat dating ur potential hubby for yrs is wot wld giv u d kind of marriage u av dreamt of(a happy one for dat matter)

If care is not taken, u will fall flat.

B flexible in ur decisions. Not everyfin will go as u expect in life, there are tyms u nid to drop expectations.

you make a lot of sense, thanks

You are beautiful dats already an asset but may be you should losen up a little bit. Your attitude of playing too hard to get may scare guys away from you. You just have to learn how to love someone and admit dat fact that you love the person don't try to surpress it, just let it flow naturally coz you can't be too smart for nature or even cheat nature. Trust me most nigerian guys are scared of gals who are so contious of their beauty and I see dat as a problem you have just try and losen up and any relationship u going into try and be positive about it don't just go in with d fear dat you don't wanna be used. Untill u try something serious with a guy you can never get to understand what it really means to be in a relationship coz from your write up its obvious you ve not had a serious relationship coz ur scared of losing your virginity. My dear virginity doesn't even count to most nigerian men these days, its even a turn off for me personally, there are more gals who are not virgins than virgins but are happily married. Would you rather prefer to keep ur virginity and don't get married? Or lose it and get married. Ur choice but don't get me wrong thoug am not sayin been a virgin is wrong, its just an advice. Just try and losen up a bit all d best...

honeygirl17:
I'm a virgin, I only talk about s3x here. I was told guys with biiig penisssss knows how yo f@ck better. is it true? I'm afraid of peniss too, I need your help gozie.

Haaaa!!!!!!!!!!



Me too na virgin oooh,

Big pr!ck good, but depends on how he uses it.

U re afraid of pr!ck? Ee be like say na cuccumber ,candle stick and banana, u de like.


A for helping u? Na I'm be say, na our two go disvirgin ourselves togeda na( if u re a gal).

chigoizie7:
Haaaa!!!!!!!!!!



Me too na virgin oooh,

Big pr!ck good, but depends on how he uses it.

U re afraid of pr!ck? Ee be like say na cuccumber ,candle stick and banana, u de like.


A for helping u? Na I'm be say, na our two go disvirgin ourselves togeda na( if u re a gal).

.







if I'm a girl? I'm done talking to you on Nl

Arami92:
Thank you, ummm...

I think pride is taking pride in who you are, not being desperate for attention or just not turning yourself into a doormat for people. You can be proud of who you are without thinking you are better than other people. Value yourself and others equally. I don't think i'm better than anybody.
I know some girls that have this stuck up, mean girl attitude..i'm not like that. when guys approach me, even if i'm not interested i'm never rude or mean.

I think arrogance is a false sense of pride, where in elevating yourself you also try and bring other people down. i see arrogant girls as the ones who i always looking for BIG guys with money, and walk around pretending to be more than what they are. The expect people to fall at thier feet and etc..

um, also..How do i communicate frustration without nagging?

and how am i to be humble without letting men take advantage of me?

As a woman how do you protect yourself from being hurt but still leave yourself open for the right person??

Everyman that enters my life doesn't have good intentions, so my pride and my distancing myself is to see how serious this guy is about me? It's like i'm a really nice person but i feel like i have to have this tough exterior or people will just be abusing you. i see how men lie, cheat,and abuse women and that scares me.

#check d completed part of my previous post.

For u to communicate ur frustration witout nagging, u just nid to introduce diplomacy in ur approach. Study d man u are involved wit.
For ex, I can b correct or state wot I dnt like witout shouting/yelling @ som1 and stil b firm

For u not to b taken for granted, u av to know who arami is first and wot u actually want in ur type of man.knowing all dis, then u shld stand for woteva u want witout takin chances.

For u not to b hurt, av a free mind $ b flexible. Do not expect too much from people so ur expectation wunt b cut short. Everyone has a sense of self worth(buh som pple lost theirs long tym ago to emotion $ sex), use dis to tackle woteva u aint okay with.
Alwys b ready to rise to d occasion.#if u cannot stand for somfin, u will fall for anything

Arami92:
you make a lot of sense, thanks

U are most welcome.

Arami92, you are still very young, so no need to panic because it can lead to desperation. Perhaps, you need to go out more and socialise with more people. It depends on where you live. Some places in USA are really bad for socialising never mind finding a potential dates.
If you are that worried, then move to a metropolitan city/state like New York, maryland,new jersey, Chicago where you can find a lot of Nigerians.

honeygirl17:
.






if I'm a girl? I'm done talking to you on Nl

I am just taking precautions nah, to avoid nailing a fellow G,













Oya, am sorry, cum, make we disvirgin ourselves.
U know say practice makes perfect.

chigoizie7:
I am just taking precautions nah, to avoid nailing a fellow G,













Oya, am sorry, cum, make we disvirgin ourselves.
U know say practice makes perfect.

its OK, didn't you see my siggy?

Arami92:
So Nairalanders! i Need advice oo!


I'm Nigerian, but i'm very Americanized..(came to America when i was small).

People tell me i'm a very pretty girl, and most of my friends say it won't be hard for me to get married...BUT i can't seem to get a boyfriend talk-less of marriage. At 23 i've never even had a serious boyfriend and i don't know why. i'm starting to wonder if there is something seriously wrong with me that i cannot see.

Here are the things i think may be the problem (based on my opinion and what others have told me):

a) I'm not always super approachable. i'm not mean at all but i don't go out of my way to be talking to everybody. But i always dress well, i smile and act friendly and i'm not mean to people. But my friends still say because guys may be intimidated when they see a pretty girl who has a stuck up appearance they won't approach her. I have pride but it's not arrogance.

b) I'm still a virgin. I get scared when it comes to sexual things because my biggest fear is to lose my virginity with a man that will only leave me or doesn't truly love me. So when i'm dating a guy and he tries to make things sexual i always cut that very short!. My friends say this may be a turnoff to guys because you have to tease them and give them something to hang on to because men are very sexual. (Like i won't even kiss you until i really like you.) BUT my father raised me to never be ashewo! So i try to keep myself as pure as possible for the right person, so sometimes that gets in the way of the natural flow of things.

c) I'm stubborn o! Like sometimes i like to form *Hard-to-get* I was always told as a woman you should never be too easy for a man, that you should let him chase you. And this is usually what i do. And i also don't always show my emotions. Like if i'm starting to really like a guy i'm very scared to express it. I always hold back unless he professes his love for me first. I feel like if you show too much emotion too soon you can scare men away so i let him lead on how much emotion to show.

d) lastly I only like to date Nigerian guys. But i live in a city where there are very few of us. My friends say when i move to a city with more Nigerians the suitors will be rolling in but idk. I still cant help but feel like maybe something is wrong with me.


Words of advice will be appreciated<3

@op Arami, I would love to know you please.No jokes, am just kinda interested in you. Kindly send me a pm. Though I Live in NAija but am a frequent visitor to d US and my next visit will be in September

Arami92:
So Nairalanders! i Need advice oo!


I'm Nigerian, but i'm very Americanized..(came to America when i was small).

People tell me i'm a very pretty girl, and most of my friends say it won't be hard for me to get married...BUT i can't seem to get a boyfriend talk-less of marriage. At 23 i've never even had a serious boyfriend and i don't know why. i'm starting to wonder if there is something seriously wrong with me that i cannot see.

Here are the things i think may be the problem (based on my opinion and what others have told me):

a) I'm not always super approachable. i'm not mean at all but i don't go out of my way to be talking to everybody. But i always dress well, i smile and act friendly and i'm not mean to people. But my friends still say because guys may be intimidated when they see a pretty girl who has a stuck up appearance they won't approach her. I have pride but it's not arrogance.

b) I'm still a virgin. I get scared when it comes to sexual things because my biggest fear is to lose my virginity with a man that will only leave me or doesn't truly love me. So when i'm dating a guy and he tries to make things sexual i always cut that very short!. My friends say this may be a turnoff to guys because you have to tease them and give them something to hang on to because men are very sexual. (Like i won't even kiss you until i really like you.) BUT my father raised me to never be ashewo! So i try to keep myself as pure as possible for the right person, so sometimes that gets in the way of the natural flow of things.

c) I'm stubborn o! Like sometimes i like to form *Hard-to-get* I was always told as a woman you should never be too easy for a man, that you should let him chase you. And this is usually what i do. And i also don't always show my emotions. Like if i'm starting to really like a guy i'm very scared to express it. I always hold back unless he professes his love for me first. I feel like if you show too much emotion too soon you can scare men away so i let him lead on how much emotion to show.

d) lastly I only like to date Nigerian guys. But i live in a city where there are very few of us. My friends say when i move to a city with more Nigerians the suitors will be rolling in but idk. I still cant help but feel like maybe something is wrong with me.


Words of advice will be appreciated<3

Nice ad any way sha will be in Washington in September I will like to see you and gal from what I saw on the pic you are not pretty just a girl with so much make up, will love to see you in the morning without those make ups then I will judge.
www.

Omotayor123:
Op me sef dey fear...

I will marry u, don't worry

Arami92:
So Nairalanders! i Need advice oo!


I'm Nigerian, but i'm very Americanized..(came to America when i was small).

People tell me i'm a very pretty girl, and most of my friends say it won't be hard for me to get married...BUT i can't seem to get a boyfriend talk-less of marriage. At 23 i've never even had a serious boyfriend and i don't know why. i'm starting to wonder if there is something seriously wrong with me that i cannot see.

Here are the things i think may be the problem (based on my opinion and what others have told me):

a) I'm not always super approachable. i'm not mean at all but i don't go out of my way to be talking to everybody. But i always dress well, i smile and act friendly and i'm not mean to people. But my friends still say because guys may be intimidated when they see a pretty girl who has a stuck up appearance they won't approach her. I have pride but it's not arrogance.

b) I'm still a virgin. I get scared when it comes to sexual things because my biggest fear is to lose my virginity with a man that will only leave me or doesn't truly love me. So when i'm dating a guy and he tries to make things sexual i always cut that very short!. My friends say this may be a turnoff to guys because you have to tease them and give them something to hang on to because men are very sexual. (Like i won't even kiss you until i really like you.) BUT my father raised me to never be ashewo! So i try to keep myself as pure as possible for the right person, so sometimes that gets in the way of the natural flow of things.

c) I'm stubborn o! Like sometimes i like to form *Hard-to-get* I was always told as a woman you should never be too easy for a man, that you should let him chase you. And this is usually what i do. And i also don't always show my emotions. Like if i'm starting to really like a guy i'm very scared to express it. I always hold back unless he professes his love for me first. I feel like if you show too much emotion too soon you can scare men away so i let him lead on how much emotion to show.

d) lastly I only like to date Nigerian guys. But i live in a city where there are very few of us. My friends say when i move to a city with more Nigerians the suitors will be rolling in but idk. I still cant help but feel like maybe something is wrong with me.


Words of advice will be appreciated<3

I will marry u.

Arami92:
So Nairalanders! i Need advice oo!


I'm Nigerian, but i'm very Americanized..(came to America when i was small).

People tell me i'm a very pretty girl, and most of my friends say it won't be hard for me to get married...BUT i can't seem to get a boyfriend talk-less of marriage. At 23 i've never even had a serious boyfriend and i don't know why. i'm starting to wonder if there is something seriously wrong with me that i cannot see.

Here are the things i think may be the problem (based on my opinion and what others have told me):

a) I'm not always super approachable. i'm not mean at all but i don't go out of my way to be talking to everybody. But i always dress well, i smile and act friendly and i'm not mean to people. But my friends still say because guys may be intimidated when they see a pretty girl who has a stuck up appearance they won't approach her. I have pride but it's not arrogance.

b) I'm still a virgin. I get scared when it comes to sexual things because my biggest fear is to lose my virginity with a man that will only leave me or doesn't truly love me. So when i'm dating a guy and he tries to make things sexual i always cut that very short!. My friends say this may be a turnoff to guys because you have to tease them and give them something to hang on to because men are very sexual. (Like i won't even kiss you until i really like you.) BUT my father raised me to never be ashewo! So i try to keep myself as pure as possible for the right person, so sometimes that gets in the way of the natural flow of things.

c) I'm stubborn o! Like sometimes i like to form *Hard-to-get* I was always told as a woman you should never be too easy for a man, that you should let him chase you. And this is usually what i do. And i also don't always show my emotions. Like if i'm starting to really like a guy i'm very scared to express it. I always hold back unless he professes his love for me first. I feel like if you show too much emotion too soon you can scare men away so i let him lead on how much emotion to show.

d) lastly I only like to date Nigerian guys. But i live in a city where there are very few of us. My friends say when i move to a city with more Nigerians the suitors will be rolling in but idk. I still cant help but feel like maybe something is wrong with me.


Words of advice will be appreciated<3

plz follow me back let talk or call me 08065500452

Arami92:
So Nairalanders! i Need advice oo!


I'm Nigerian, but i'm very Americanized..(came to America when i was small).

People tell me i'm a very pretty girl, and most of my friends say it won't be hard for me to get married...BUT i can't seem to get a boyfriend talk-less of marriage. At 23 i've never even had a serious boyfriend and i don't know why. i'm starting to wonder if there is something seriously wrong with me that i cannot see.

Here are the things i think may be the problem (based on my opinion and what others have told me):

a) I'm not always super approachable. i'm not mean at all but i don't go out of my way to be talking to everybody. But i always dress well, i smile and act friendly and i'm not mean to people. But my friends still say because guys may be intimidated when they see a pretty girl who has a stuck up appearance they won't approach her. I have pride but it's not arrogance.

b) I'm still a virgin. I get scared when it comes to sexual things because my biggest fear is to lose my virginity with a man that will only leave me or doesn't truly love me. So when i'm dating a guy and he tries to make things sexual i always cut that very short!. My friends say this may be a turnoff to guys because you have to tease them and give them something to hang on to because men are very sexual. (Like i won't even kiss you until i really like you.) BUT my father raised me to never be ashewo! So i try to keep myself as pure as possible for the right person, so sometimes that gets in the way of the natural flow of things.

c) I'm stubborn o! Like sometimes i like to form *Hard-to-get* I was always told as a woman you should never be too easy for a man, that you should let him chase you. And this is usually what i do. And i also don't always show my emotions. Like if i'm starting to really like a guy i'm very scared to express it. I always hold back unless he professes his love for me first. I feel like if you show too much emotion too soon you can scare men away so i let him lead on how much emotion to show.

d) lastly I only like to date Nigerian guys. But i live in a city where there are very few of us. My friends say when i move to a city with more Nigerians the suitors will be rolling in but idk. I still cant help but feel like maybe something is wrong with me.


Words of advice will be appreciated<3

After viewing your profile, all I can say is lose that fear.....

Plus there are a lot of bad eggs (American Nigerian girls) that have spoilt market for the good ones.... Every city I have moved to has had a tale of why we should not near any

honeygirl17:
its OK, didn't you see my siggy?

Maybe I am the African prince.

kpolli:
After viewing your profile, all I can say is lose that fear.....

Plus there a lot of bad eggs (American Nigerian girls) that have spoilt market for the good ones.... Every city I have moved to has had a tale of why we should not near any

The simplest truth.