₦airaland Forum

classicB:
Let assume some girls dress scantily to get raped. What about those underage girls?? What about that innocent housemaid that get raped daily by Oga simply.because Madam isn't available, those men that rapes their own daughters nko??

their mothers failed them

devonpaul:
Rape is real, but u can get raped anywhere. either in a guys house or ur fathers house.. in a pub. anywhere.. befor u visit a guy, u must have known the guy to some extent, know what he is capable of, dont be going to a guys house when u dont have any dealings with him.. u are not his girlfriend and hes not urs too and moreover, bible said, Run away from Devil and his devices.. there are several means deviced by guys nowadays wheneva u visit them to get u aroused once u start seeing some of this trends, u shud know its about time to go back home. Lol, u guys shud not try to discourage girls from visiting some of us that are mature enough to share house with female friends without demanding for sex

What of my friend that almost got raped by her cousin. She went to visit him at home, she never in a million years would have thought that he would try to rape her, what save her was the empty malt bottle she drank- she broke it on his head.



I can not visit a guy alone at his home, I either have to go with friends or he has close family around, other than that, we would sit outside and gist all we want. No time for if I had known. My own experience, my girl friend's man tried to rape me. He came to pick me up so we would together meet up with his babe;my friend, that was the arrangement. It was late at night,he just parked the car and started being aggressive and violent. I was in total shock.



A lot of Men are animals in human skin.

If u are not my boyfriend, I can't be alone with u.

oreos:
What?

Hmm

ahsekeena:
What of my friend that almost got raped by her cousin. She went to visit him at home, she never in a million years would have thought that he would try to rape her, what save her was the empty malt bottle she drank- she broke it on his head.



I can not visit a guy alone at his home, I either have to go with friends or he has close family around, other than that, we would sit outside and gist all we want. No time for if I had known. My own experience, my girl friend's man tried to rape me. He came to pick me up so we would together meet up with his babe;my friend, that was the arrangement. It was late at night,he just parked the car and started being aggressive and violent. I was in total shock.



A lot of Men are animals in human skin.

If u are not my boyfriend, I can't be alone with u.

Im gonna open a thread now about the male organ, if u like dont read and comment then tomorrow come here and scream "men are animals" we are not go read my post that will be visible in ten mins !!!!!!

rubbish trend.
classic B first go tell ur fellow bitches ....fellow girls to stop wearing stupid and provocative dresses on.
then this topic may be relevant..

Pidggin:
Can you live without women, c dis wan

So you have not seen individual (man) that visit eatery alone except being accompany by woman..?

You must not rape
You must not cheat
You must not decieve
You must not be foolish

dfrost:
Hi SirShymexx,
How I wish I could give a glass of chilled Nutri C (wetin you dey expect before? ) for your post. You are among those that have hit the nail on the head. The following are my submissions based on your post:

Third paragraph - I agree totally with you. When I was in my early teens, a family friend (female, in her late teens) came over to our house on a routine visit. As soon as she saw that my elder sister wanted to get something outside, she come over to me and started stroking my private part. I was shocked even as little as I was. I slapped her hand away but couldn't push her away because she was quite bigger than me. Immediately my sister came in, I reported the matter to her. My sister gave her a slap of her life and warned her never to come to our house again and she never did. So boys can also be victimised.

Fourth paragraph - Rape victims are not in the majority, they are also not in the minority. Are you also aware that husbands rape their wives too? It's a consent issue. Probably at that moment, the wife was not in the mood. But the unnecessary noise owes its credit to social media. More people are becoming aware faster than ever before. Like you said and I quote "it can be dealt with in a more effective way, without creating unnecessary suspicions/tensions between both groups". I reasoned on this line with classicB and she quite understood. But you know men, we are so hard-wired that we can only break at the highest level of pressure. So sometimes we sulk it in and pretend nothing happened while women talk about it. Like I mentioned earlier, they are at the receiving end. It's a very traumatising ordeal. One can never feel the pain of another unless you pass through the same treatment. What I understand from the participants of this topic (especially the women folk) is that they need assurance from the opposite gender that they will be protected (excluding those who hunt for trouble on their own) and also the male folk should speak out for them when the need arises.

PS: those who are interested in reading the long post will always read it if they want to learn. No man is an epitome of knowledge. Shalom.

Bottled water will do lol. Thanks for the nice gesture.

Thanks for sharing ya story. It shows it isn't about teenage girls alone - a lot of teen boys also go through the same ordeal. Hence it is problematic to always make it about one sex, while demonising the opposing one. Even when I was a schoolboy, there were a few tutors like that as well.

Yes, the social media can be a tool to create awareness. However, when it is something as old as rape is - there are other effective ways to go about it, to achieve a desired result. You just don't wake up every morning to spam cyberspace with cries about rape, while demonising the opposite and create unnecessary unease for people. Rape is a serious issue. Apart from concerned males who would feel some type of way reading all these unnecessary threads - there are rape victims out there who are still traumatised and would want to forget about the past. Do you think they are doing these folks any favours by spamming rape everywhere?

Honestly, rape in marriages is a different kettle of fish entirely and having an opinion about it is like walking on eggshells. If you have been in relationships, you'd know that it goes both ways...but it seems the agenda is to make men the villains, with women as victims. When you are in a relationship as a guy and probably a day comes when you are not in the mood to have sex with ya partner...do you know how problematic that can be with all kinds of cheating accusations and the innate self-esteem issues coming to the fore about not being attracted to her anymore? Most times, we succumb to the pressure against our will due to the male ego. However, if it were the other way around, it will be termed rape. That is why I believe once you are married - there's an unwritten rule that gives you consent any time you want it. And if folks think they want a rape agenda in marriage as an institution - then it shouldn't be about the men alone, women should also be liable whenever they manipulate/force their partners to have sex with them via emotional blackmail. Let's open the Pandora's box and let everyone get consumed. Men can't be at the receiving end all the time.

P.S: I might sound a tad incoherent - that is basically cos I'm typing from a phone.

poppop:
My dear we live in a terrible world. Let me tell you my own story. Please forgive the long story. At the university then, I had a good friend (or so I thought) We were in the same group in fellowship. We got on well and naturally bonded. I was in a relationship then and he seemed like a guy man who was just running his thing and was not interested in commitment to a particular girl/relationship. There was no indication he was ever interested in me; it was a purely platonic relationship. I mean I am saying this so some one does not begin the blame game later.

We stayed in the same locality off campus so it was not unusual to go home together. The area we lived in was a bit rough so it made sense to go home in a group or with him. After church we would go home together just gisting and laughing - nothing untoward. Sometimes if i left earlier or with another person, he would even call to say 'where you dey? I'm going home now oh or you are a bad girl you left without me today' Naturally he knew my hostel having walked me home several times. One day he showed me his own hostel. Then I made a big mistake albeit an innocent one.

I went to visit him on a rainy Saturday morning. I was actually going to see a friend when I passed by his hostel and went in to greet him. He seemed very cheerful and asked if I came to see him specifically. I said no and even showed him the novel I was going to give my friend. He excused himself and went to the bathroom while I was kept busy looking at his pictures and stuff.

Some minutes later he came in with towel on his waist and water running off his body. I would later realize he did this on purpose perhaps thinking I would find him irresistable and make his work easier for him. Anyway it didnt work on me cos i'm not that type of person. It would take more than a wet man on a towel to drive me nuts. Sha I was a bit taken aback since I thought he would dress in the bathroom since he knew a girl was around. At that point, I decided to leave. I was not annoyed or anything, I just announced it was time to hurry along but he refused. He pushed me back on the bed (I was on my feet then) and locked the door and removed the key.

I nearly died. I thought it was a joke because he kept laughing and pushing me back anytime I stood on my feet. At some point he was over me on the bed holding me back with an arm and laughing. I kept saying 'hey stop, stop it. Its not funny. I need to go'
I was scared but I tried to be brave. My dear, till date I don’t know how I left that room but I did in one piece. After that incident, that was the LAST time in my life I visited any man I was not dating.

By the way I continued to see the boy in fellowship but I gave him long space. I think I even confronted him…long story.

Did the guy fvck you at the end or not? Na wetin i wan know.

Eluwilussit:
First, there's no such thing like "innocently" when u visit a guy in his room. Every girl who has a male friend, knows too well that at the end of the day, the whole talk will drift towards sex. Men want sex. Men like sex. Women too.

If a guy is your male friend, chances are that he admires you. Even sexually. Truth is that the "innocent" visitor is usually not so innocent. The difference is just "timing". The girls wanna take their time to get to know the guys better, use the guys, and not appear cheap, while the guys are always too impatient and can't wait. As for motives, both have the same motive. Sex.

Our girls are gold diggers. When a fellow student buys u drinks, food, recharge cards etc, why do u think he's doing it? Don't forget that guys show their "love" tru gifts and dotting on gals. In return, what do you think they want? "Thank u broda"? Well, they want only one thing. If you can't figure that out, that probably explains why u nearly got yourself into trouble, severally.

There's no such thing as a "good guy" at a certain stage in a guy's life. It's either u are a sharp guy or a magga. Who wants to be a magga? Not my guy.

Solution is very simple. Don't visit a guy in his house, unless you are his girlfriend and ready to "comfort him".Whatever that might be. Goat and yam no dey stay one place. These days sef, goat and goat to stay together fit turn to wahala.

Women should stop playing victims. When a true rape case happens, ehnn, we can all come together to condemn it. On campus, all man na he goat. Konji tins full ground. Most guys are still learners and lack self-control.

99% of the time, u will sleep with oyibo girls same day u meet dem if them dig u. But naija gals, go use u die before u go even know their real names. Lol. If u lay with dogs, you get ticks. Girls should stop assuming that there's such thing as a free meal. Boys just wanna have fun. Ask Sigmund Freud.

[size=15pt]You deserve a presidential award!!!!!![/size]

misspicy:
The crazy kinda bae Btw obontami why are u using anoda moniker

my sister thats not me, he's only using my style of signature

i think i'ma sue him for piracy

Pidggin:
All your insulting will not work, she has said the truth

Have you been raped before?

J

Dragonking:
Have you been raped before?

Have you raped before?

SirShymexx:
Good to hear that, my beautiful Ijebu sis. Happy Sunday.

Firstly, at age 18 and above, everyone should be able to sense danger, when he/she is around one. Minor will get a pass...but once you're over 16, you should start being held accountable. The world isn't a safe place and a lot of folks are out there to take advantage of people.

Secondly, a lot of chics do that all time. I can speak about from my own experience. A lot of chics have slept over at mines, wearing my T-shirt with just panties on, or my tracksuit bottom - and they didn't give in to sex. Apart from the fact that I can't jeopardise my future and everything I've worked hard for, for sex - I knowing losing and not having ya way all the time is part of life. You win some and lose some. And for a chic to feel comfortable enough to sleep over at yours - even if she doesn't let off the first/one time, she'll do another time. It's all about playing the waiting game. However, not every guy understands that - so chics shouldn't be putting themselves in a precarious position like that cos they're just as culpable as the guy in the act.

Thirdly, when chics, especially teenagers, are around perverted older people/extended-family-members (the uncles and aunts) who're potential rapists - they'll know. Don't forget we were once teenagers and these things don't just happen at one fell swoop - these things happen in stages - from the perverted way they look at you, to how they might get touchy from time to time, etc.,except in isolated cases. And in as much as a lot of teenagers do can sense what's going on, I believe parents should endeavour to educate their kids on how to deal with folks who're like that, to avert danger. I've got sisters and a lot of female acquaintances, and we talk about these things all the time. Teenage girls aren't even the only ones who go through this ordeal - a lot teen boys also do.

Fourthly, lol at being unnecessarily at alert. Life is short, and enjoy it to the fullest. Not saying you should drop guard, but being like that can put people in an awkward position. It's just basically similar to how most white people act when they see a black male. As a black male, it will always trouble you for being targeted unjustly for absolutely no reason whatsoever. And I believe if this whole rape noise isn't put in check, it's going to create the same unnecessary suspicions between men and women. Always apply wisdom and be vigilant/observant in a subtle way. Not all men are potential rapists. I don't know how rampant rape is in Nigeria, however, I doubt rape victims are in the majority. So why the unnecessary noise, when it can be dealt with in a more effective way, without creating unnecessary suspicions/tensions between both groups?

Lastly, no guy, no matter how perverted he's would just see any chic on the road and rape her - except nutjobs. Hence I posited that they seldom happen, regardless of how primeval the society is. And when you're victim of a nutjob on the prowl - there's nothing you can do about that. Just basically a victim of circumstance. Anyway, the victim card women play all the time is nauseating - when are they ever going to be responsible for anything? The world doesn't revolve around them alone - men are also out here and we're also victims of a lot of things.

P.S: sorry for the long post.

Happy sunday to you tooo

First paragraph- I agree just a little ooo

2nd paragraph - no comment

3rd paragraph- hmmm thats true and one point I will emphasize is the unnecessary tension it will create between guys and ladies. I have never been harassed but the way it seems a sizeable number of ladies have had near-rape cases is quite alarming

4th paragraph- You think ladies are just playing the victim card unnecessarily?

SirShymexx:
Good to hear that, my beautiful Ijebu sis. Happy Sunday.

Firstly, at age 18 and above, everyone should be able to sense danger, when he/she is around one. Minor will get a pass...but once you're over 16, you should start being held accountable. The world isn't a safe place and a lot of folks are out there to take advantage of people.

Secondly, a lot of chics do that all time. I can speak about from my own experience. A lot of chics have slept over at mines, wearing my T-shirt with just panties on, or my tracksuit bottom - and they didn't give in to sex. Apart from the fact that I can't jeopardise my future and everything I've worked hard for, for sex - I knowing losing and not having ya way all the time is part of life. You win some and lose some. And for a chic to feel comfortable enough to sleep over at yours - even if she doesn't let off the first/one time, she'll do another time. It's all about playing the waiting game. However, not every guy understands that - so chics shouldn't be putting themselves in a precarious position like that cos they're just as culpable as the guy in the act.

Thirdly, when chics, especially teenagers, are around perverted older people/extended-family-members (the uncles and aunts) who're potential rapists - they'll know. Don't forget we were once teenagers and these things don't just happen at one fell swoop - these things happen in stages - from the perverted way they look at you, to how they might get touchy from time to time, etc.,except in isolated cases. And in as much as a lot of teenagers do can sense what's going on, I believe parents should endeavour to educate their kids on how to deal with folks who're like that, to avert danger. I've got sisters and a lot of female acquaintances, and we talk about these things all the time. Teenage girls aren't even the only ones who go through this ordeal - a lot teen boys also do.

Fourthly, lol at being unnecessarily at alert. Life is short, and enjoy it to the fullest. Not saying you should drop guard, but being like that can put people in an awkward position. It's just basically similar to how most white people act when they see a black male. As a black male, it will always trouble you for being targeted unjustly for absolutely no reason whatsoever. And I believe if this whole rape noise isn't put in check, it's going to create the same unnecessary suspicions between men and women. Always apply wisdom and be vigilant/observant in a subtle way. Not all men are potential rapists. I don't know how rampant rape is in Nigeria, however, I doubt rape victims are in the majority. So why the unnecessary noise, when it can be dealt with in a more effective way, without creating unnecessary suspicions/tensions between both groups?

Lastly, no guy, no matter how perverted he's would just see any chic on the road and rape her - except nutjobs. Hence I posited that they seldom happen, regardless of how primeval the society is. And when you're victim of a nutjob on the prowl - there's nothing you can do about that. Just basically a victim of circumstance. Anyway, the victim card women play all the time is nauseating - when are they ever going to be responsible for anything? The world doesn't revolve around them alone - men are also out here and we're also victims of a lot of things.

P.S: sorry for the long post.

Happy sunday to you tooo

First paragraph- I agree just a little ooo

2nd paragraph - no comment

3rd paragraph- hmmm thats true and one point I will emphasize is the unnecessary tension it will create between guys and ladies. I have never been harassed but the way it seems a sizeable number of ladies have had near-rape cases is quite alarming.

4th paragraph- You think ladies are just playing the victim card unnecessarily? I really don't think so.


why am I not seeing my mentions

Real men don't rape girls.

dfrost:
. What I understand from the participants of this topic (especially the women folk) is that they need assurance from the opposite gender that they will be protected (excluding those who hunt for trouble on their own) and also the male folk should speak out for them when the need arises.
.

Can the guys assure the ladies this.

Where is my own nutriC?

dfrost:
Haba EggovinMma , sorry if my post was misinterpreted. So sorry about that. I never insulted you. There is no need to wish me death by lethal injection. I was asking for suggestions on ways to curb the issue. Best regards.

I don't want to believe you're a rapist. I don't have no love for them, sorry if you're pissed.Take care.

dfrost:
Haba EggovinMma , sorry if my post was misinterpreted. So sorry about that. I never insulted you. There is no need to wish me death by lethal injection. I was asking for suggestions on ways to curb the issue. Best regards.

I don't want to believe you're a rapist. I don't have love for them, sorry if you're pissed.Take care.

yetseyi:
Can the guys assure the ladies this.

Where is my own nutriC?

Yes we can. Did you notice that some guys were actually defending ladies on the thread? So we can whenever the need rises.

Don't worry I'll serve yours once the water in the refrigerator gets cold.

emsheddy:
classicB, Some of my brothers have said it already. If these are the kind of guys u always find yourself with, I advice u go for deliverance my dear. no offence meant. I have had too many female friends, even slept in same room alone with lots of them, without even touching their trouser or skirt, let alone trying to force myself on them. someone needs to drill it into ur head that ALL GUYS are not THE SAME. So whatever made u think of admonishing female folks to never visit male folks is rubbish. If u have a male friend who is always looking at u seductively, or is a womaniser, and u throw all cautions to the wind n chose to visit him alone, that doesn't give u the right to label the entire male folks as MOLESTERS. The signs were there. but u chose not to see them. You have heard what ur male colleagues discuss about ladies, atleast that's an insight to the kind of guys they are. My female friends visit me a lot and prefer to even visit me alone because dat way I give them all d attention they enjoy n want when they visit me. there has never been any attempt to molest, neither will there ever be. You haven't befriend all guys, and so not until u do that, plz do not label all of us as MOLESTERS!

My dear speak for yourself. You don't know the heart of many guys out there. Alot of ladies can relate to the op's post

Lol there are some guys u already know their intention from the onset, there's this guy I know I can't even consider him a friend or toaster o, the only time I talk to him on WhatsApp is when he says hi and I reply with hello and that's it, and then one weekend like that early in the morning I received a message from him, asking me to come to his house and because I told him no he blocked me sharp sharp on WhatsApp........

kaeforum:
Just becos a few reckless gals were raped doesnt mean all the guys are dangerous, stop spreading hate on this forum, dont vent your frustrations on the guys , just because they didnt marry u.

Listen to yourself please! A few reckless girls. So when a girl is raped she was reckless? Yes not all guys are rapists but with this mindset, what do want people to think

EggovinMma:
I don't want to believe you're a rapist. I don't have love for them, sorry if you're pissed.Take care.

Apologies accepted. Not pissed though, only surprised. We will all get there eventually.

Please shout it out to the women folk: enrol in a self-defense skill. Karate, judo, jujitsu, taekwondo et al. Make sure you don't use the skills for attacking the male folk. Only for self-preservation.

Shalom.

Apparently many of US are having it so hard to differentiate consensual sex from RAPE.

Pidggin:
J

Have you raped before?

Typical..You cant answer the question. I understand.

soonest:
My dear speak for yourself. You don't know the heart of many guys out there. Alot of ladies can relate to the op's post

Just like I ve met a lot of female whores, does that in anyway mean that all gals are whores? (U can as well speak for yourself if ur ans is NO) @least a lot of guys can relate to some girls being whores.


My point is.


*all guys are not the same, (there are bad ones, but u don't ve to generalize it.


*i can not support rapists, I can not be a party to people who speak for them or who blame ladies for being vulnerable to rape victims. But ONE thing I know for sure is that prevention is better than cure. I want ladies to do their part and leave the rest to God.



I will stop here. Otherwise. Would throw more light on what I meant.

Dragonking:
[size=15pt]You deserve a presidential award!!!!!![/size]

Thanks. Abeg, help me make it happen.

misspicy:
The crazy kinda bae
Btw obontami why are u using anoda moniker

eh eh thats a different moniker too

SirShymexx:
P.S: I might sound a tad incoherent - that is basically cos I'm typing from a phone.

Forget about the coherence. Message passed, message received. I'm not above mistakes either owing to typo.

classicB
soonest
yetseyi

Don't be afraid of all men. Don't loose guard either. Shalom.

opeaceo:
No, I'm not joking, and to answer your question, I didn't say I'll visit everyone of them to know the good from the bad.

.


So how do u know which one is good or bad? You didnt give any clue on how to.

Most rape cases are perpetrated by acquaintances and close friends, people you'd never expect. So my advice is do not put yourself in a compromising situation. If a girl decides to visit a guy, she should ask herself if she's willing to give in to the guy, if he makes advances. If she's willing, she can visit. If she's not, she shouldn't.

I don't know if u hold the bible as an authority, but the story of Diana is a lesson. She was raped by a man whom the bible described as the most honourable in his fathers house. He even had intentions of marrying her. But she was molested by him. So you can't really tell.

I'll go with the ops advice any day, anytime. I sually ask the females I wish to meet to choose a place that is convenient and comfortable for them, so I can come.

draymond:
rubbish trend.
classic B first go tell ur fellow bitches ....fellow girls to stop wearing stupid and provocative dresses on.
then this topic may be relevant..

Your momma is also a bitch_

ireneidiva:
So your classmate will ask you to come and cook 4 him because he is crippled and you will go? Smh

Thank you for this. Dont mind all these stupiid ladies here trying to blame the guys as usual.