Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,167,068 members, 7,867,040 topics. Date: Friday, 21 June 2024 at 09:58 AM

Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? - Romance (5) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? (57367 Views)

Man Blames His Fiancee After She Caught Him Cheating, See His Reason (pics / Man Stares Under His Fiancee's Legs As She Opens Them Wide In Pre-wedding Shoot. / Man And His Fiancee's Bum In Doggie Pre-Wedding Photos (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (12) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by adanny01(m): 12:18am On Aug 22, 2015
freecocoa:
You didn't even condemn what he did, if that's not hypocrisy, I don't know what is.

I am not of the opinion that she tells, because I believe the lady he is about to wed knows, but that doesn't mean he's not an a$$hole.

You see yourself. I didnt condemn his actions is what bothers you but not the question she asked. I simply answered her. Condemning his actions is pointless since he is not here to hear it.

My comment didnt say i support his actions so why are you judging me?
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by UyiIredia(m): 12:20am On Aug 22, 2015
eme40rald:

Kind hearted nairalanders please what do I do? should I expose him to the girl or not.

He has almost married the girl so why spoil it for him. Love him enough to forgive and let go.
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Swagt101(m): 12:22am On Aug 22, 2015
*puffs weed on thread* The guy is a scumbag.Bae I know its hard but try to forgive n forget.There's no need crying over spilt milk. Gear up,there are better guys out there #Peace cool
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by UyiIredia(m): 12:23am On Aug 22, 2015
eme40rald:
virginity sir
Just wondering. Do you think the guy was with you just for $ex ?
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Nobody: 12:33am On Aug 22, 2015
eme40rald:
Hello nairalanders

It is with sadness and hurt that I decided to ask guidance on what action I should take with regards to the event that happened in my life.

I met a guy two years ago and fell in love with him wholeheartedly in fact he is my first love. the relationship was fun and romantic. I lost my innocence to him. Although there were times I had suspicions and I would confront him about it but he always found a way to clear my suspicions. One issue I always felt bad about was that he never took me to his family. As at the beginning of the relationship about a month into it his sister got married and I was not invited I felt maybe it was too early and shrugged it off. he never used my pictures as dp claiming he doesn't feel its proper until we are married. apart from all these he was a sweet and loving man. we were like best friends.

Fast forward to two years later I did something I had never done before. I searched his phone while he was asleep and what I discovered was a blow for me. He was in another relationship!!! I stole the girl's contact and disguised as his colleague just to get information from her with time she was free with me. I discovered they had been dating for seven years and she lived in another state. just last week he said he was travelling for a business event only for me to find out he went for his introduction to her family.

confronted him and he has been begging me to forgive him.

Kind hearted nairalanders please what do I do? should I expose him to the girl or not.

Honestly you exposing him to the girl will not make the marriage stop, she wont throw 7 years relationship away because of a fling (ur relationship unfortunately), he will manage to convince her and they will move on. Babe, its a loss you will just have to conceed to, if telling will make you happier do so (but it wont spoil anything )
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Swagt101(m): 12:33am On Aug 22, 2015
adanny01:


You see yourself. I didnt condemn his actions is what bothers you but not the question she asked. I simply answered her. Condemning his actions is pointless since he is not here to hear it.

My comment didnt say i support his actions so why are you judging me?
Guy don't waste ur time replying dat babe abeg, na all these bogus e-feminism activist, they just wanna score cheap points tarnishing men's images @ the slightest opportunity
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by tohpahz(f): 12:36am On Aug 22, 2015
cry cry when i want to swear.. someone would say i shouldn't..

How will he waste 2yrs of someone's life like that.. embarassed

Gal.. move on jare.. am so sorry.!

2 Likes

Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by nuelyoyo(m): 12:36am On Aug 22, 2015
eme40rald:
Tnx everyone for ur advices
now let me ask u some questions. What were the terms of ur relationship wif this guy? Did he promise u marriage or u just assumed he will marry you? This are the factors that can make me concluded if he played u or not.
I am very careful when I meet ladies whom i know I won't get married to, even if I like them, I always tell them from the onset that it won't lead to marriage, so she understands what she's up for. Sorry though, and I must say, u are pretty.

1 Like

Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by InvertedHammer: 12:39am On Aug 22, 2015
What exactly are you exposing?

That you are his side chic?

I don't think the fiancee would mind. She may think na bad belle dey worry you.

It will take a lot more than that to break a marriage in this era of scarcity of eligible bachelors. If you are his baby mama, that will be a different case. You were just a fling Next time apply due diligence in your relationship(s).

4 Likes

Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Nobody: 12:43am On Aug 22, 2015
Expose the bastard den move on or you could just bone and leave him to his folly its not worth it
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by amozrano(m): 12:44am On Aug 22, 2015
eme40rald:
Hello nairalanders

It is with sadness and hurt that I decided to ask guidance on what action I should take with regards to the event that happened in my life.

I met a guy two years ago and fell in love with him wholeheartedly in fact he is my first love. the relationship was fun and romantic. I lost my innocence to him. Although there were times I had suspicions and I would confront him about it but he always found a way to clear my suspicions. One issue I always felt bad about was that he never took me to his family. As at the beginning of the relationship about a month into it his sister got married and I was not invited I felt maybe it was too early and shrugged it off. he never used my pictures as dp claiming he doesn't feel its proper until we are married. apart from all these he was a sweet and loving man. we were like best friends.

Fast forward to two years later I did something I had never done before. I searched his phone while he was asleep and what I discovered was a blow for me. He was in another relationship!!! I stole the girl's contact and disguised as his colleague just to get information from her with time she was free with me. I discovered they had been dating for seven years and she lived in another state. just last week he said he was travelling for a business event only for me to find out he went for his introduction to her family.

confronted him and he has been begging me to forgive him.

Kind hearted nairalanders please what do I do? should I expose him to the girl or not.

U entad d maturity bus,ma dear pls alight at ur bustop,and let d bus go!!!
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Eluwilussit(m): 12:46am On Aug 22, 2015
eme40rald:
Hello nairalanders

It is with sadness and hurt that I decided to ask guidance on what action I should take with regards to the event that happened in my life.

I met a guy two years ago and fell in love with him wholeheartedly in fact he is my first love. the relationship was fun and romantic. I lost my innocence to him. Although there were times I had suspicions and I would confront him about it but he always found a way to clear my suspicions. One issue I always felt bad about was that he never took me to his family. As at the beginning of the relationship about a month into it his sister got married and I was not invited I felt maybe it was too early and shrugged it off. he never used my pictures as dp claiming he doesn't feel its proper until we are married. apart from all these he was a sweet and loving man. we were like best friends.

Fast forward to two years later I did something I had never done before. I searched his phone while he was asleep and what I discovered was a blow for me. He was in another relationship!!! I stole the girl's contact and disguised as his colleague just to get information from her with time she was free with me. I discovered they had been dating for seven years and she lived in another state. just last week he said he was travelling for a business event only for me to find out he went for his introduction to her family.

confronted him and he has been begging me to forgive him.

Kind hearted nairalanders please what do I do? should I expose him to the girl or not.

Forgive him. Forget him. Delete yourself from their affair. grin grin grin
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Boyooosa(m): 12:52am On Aug 22, 2015
MY CANDID CONTRIBUTION IS THAT U R WELCOME ON BOARD I.E. IF UR STORY IS TRUE BUT IF NOT, ENJOY URSELF AS USUAL... BETTER EXPLAINED, WHAT IS THE BIG DEAL HAVING S*X FOR D FIRST TYM. ONE STORY OR THE OTHER WILL DEFINITELY COME, SO WHY D 'I WILL REPORT HIM TO D WORLD', I WILL GO AND TELL HIS MUMMY', HIS FIANCEE MUST HEAR ABOUT DIS'. C'MON, DONT SOUND LIKE A 'SMALL GIRL' AFTERALL AFTERALL U R NOT A VAG 'AGAIN'. GO AND SIT DOWN AND FIND THE NEXT ENJOYER grin. ONE DAY U WILL BORN AND UR BABY WILL B LIKE U!
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by 2scorehigh(m): 1:04am On Aug 22, 2015
delishpot:
If say na man post this topic about what his woman did to him now....... NL boys for don arrive to abuse women like vultures wey see dead body...........God dey measure una punishment with heavenly scale.

A dey tell u! Nairaland boys eh, fear us dem!
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by 6fit(f): 1:27am On Aug 22, 2015
eme40rald:
Hello nairalanders

It is with sadness and hurt that I decided to ask guidance on what action I should take with regards to the event that happened in my life.

I met a guy two years ago and fell in love with him wholeheartedly in fact he is my first love. the relationship was fun and romantic. I lost my innocence to him. Although there were times I had suspicions and I would confront him about it but he always found a way to clear my suspicions. One issue I always felt bad about was that he never took me to his family. As at the beginning of the relationship about a month into it his sister got married and I was not invited I felt maybe it was too early and shrugged it off. he never used my pictures as dp claiming he doesn't feel its proper until we are married. apart from all these he was a sweet and loving man. we were like best friends.

Fast forward to two years later I did something I had never done before. I searched his phone while he was asleep and what I discovered was a blow for me. He was in another relationship!!! I stole the girl's contact and disguised as his colleague just to get information from her with time she was free with me. I discovered they had been dating for seven years and she lived in another state. just last week he said he was travelling for a business event only for me to find out he went for his introduction to her family.

confronted him and he has been begging me to forgive him.

Kind hearted nairalanders please what do I do? should I expose him to the girl or not.


may b u dont know...let me inform u da u are a victeem. Unfortunately, it too late to raise alarm cos if u do, u will sound like a wet parot seeking attension. Yur best option is learn from d situation and move on.....never allow a man yet to show comitment by introducing u to friends n family as wife to b or wife to enter yur Jerusalem. Now d gate to yur Jerusalem has been broken open. Is a pitty
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by goodgate: 1:54am On Aug 22, 2015
delishpot:


Its all good brother. Its just that the double standard thing is *paining me* tomorrow it will be our daughters going through this. When we have failed to caution our sons. Many NL topics encourage nen to handle wom3n exactly as this man treated the poor girl.


OP.... worry not every day your heart remembers the pain karma will visit him.
Pkele, move on. I know its not easy but you have to try for your own sake.
There's absolutely nothing wrong in what the guy did, the girl should have known that Men are Polygamous in nature, and not all relationships lead to marriage. Exposing him will amount to wickedness, since he has asked for forgiveness.
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by RexTramadol1: 2:00am On Aug 22, 2015
If he can't take care of you, I WILL grin grin grin
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by goodgate: 2:01am On Aug 22, 2015
tohpahz:
cry cry when i want to swear.. someone would say i shouldn't..

How will he waste 2yrs of someone's life like that.. embarassed

Gal.. move on jare.. am so sorry.!
Story!!! Any Curse now is Empty and furtile, like there was any binding agreement. You ladies do it to guys too,so let her live with it.
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by ayokellany: 2:05am On Aug 22, 2015
Babe ndo but it's time to move either on with the cheat or over with the cheat bearing in mind the risk therein. Either way the conviction and justification you seek to make or mar the dude's secret love affair is within you so decide. Depending on how slighted i feel I might chose to mar it to the best of my ability but have it in mind the guy would never be yours to marry unless the other lady is no more.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by repogirl(f): 2:06am On Aug 22, 2015
Cheats in the.house dont wanna be exposed I guess undecided

I think the OP should move on anyway....if the fiancee is dumb enough to marry the cheat, let her.

1 Like

Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by nairalife2013(m): 2:07am On Aug 22, 2015
Atlantian:
Move on. You were a side chick. Dont ruin it for your fellow woman. She invested 7 years. No be joke. I am sure he wanted to find a better alternative, but you couldnt be better than what he already had. Sorry.
with this, the op should find solace and work harder next time. Op pls never think tennis and taekwando and chess are the only games in the world, courting also is. Take it easy, forgive him and move on. He probably put u on tests within the time u hanged out with him and... unfortunately, well, allah giveth allah taketh as they say in times like this, u failed. Just smile and go home. I did worse things in a bid to get the best material for a wife. God forgive me. I took meaner steps and more serious risks! Go and read some of my posts. Perhaps u will find what u are looking for there. Once again, sorry and Good luck.
Ps. Well, let me just open up. One of the agrieved ladies spilled it to my wife(she was my girlfriend then). "He promised to marry u too?!" My wife queried. "No," she answered labourously, "not that he promised me marriage. He once spank me. I cursed him and left. I was sure and i told him to his face no lady will ever marry him" She concluded, straight faced. "Ok. He once spanked u, right? Forgodsake he spank me several times! Well, I'll talk to him abt it and have him apologize meaningfully to u."
Itz not today guys started having more than 1 fiancee. U wont believe my wife talked to this girl at length and adviced her on the ways of men. Men are fathers, she told her. U follow them like u follow yur dad, if u love him and thatz what he craves and u want to stay a goodwife! They became freinds, a lady far older than her. She also is married now. She has long come to terms with the fact that she was not the best for me. She calmed down and used my wife's words to get a big catch for her self angry
Only a few women are ever wise to use what they have in a calm and collected way to get the best of what they want, tho atimes luck, time and chance determines it all.
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by repogirl(f): 2:11am On Aug 22, 2015
Boyooosa:
MY CANDID CONTRIBUTION IS THAT U R WELCOME ON BOARD I.E. IF UR STORY IS TRUE BUT IF NOT, ENJOY URSELF AS USUAL... BETTER EXPLAINED, WHAT IS THE BIG DEAL HAVING S*X FOR D FIRST TYM. ONE STORY OR THE OTHER WILL DEFINITELY COME, SO WHY D 'I WILL REPORT HIM TO D WORLD', I WILL GO AND TELL HIS MUMMY', HIS FIANCEE MUST HEAR ABOUT DIS'. C'MON, DONT SOUND LIKE A 'SMALL GIRL' AFTERALL AFTERALL U R NOT A VAG 'AGAIN'. GO AND SIT DOWN AND FIND THE NEXT ENJOYER grin. ONE DAY U WILL BORN AND UR BABY WILL B LIKE U!
just because you must talk doesnt mean you should talk rubbish.....now you just insulted her unconceived kid, maybe even cursed it, be watchful of your words, boy before they turn on you!

Gosh some idi'ots on this forum indeed have as's for brains!

1 Like

Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by AreaFada2: 2:21am On Aug 22, 2015
Oyind17:
this guy is a bad player

My brother, ehn. Serious John Player Gold Leaf I swear.

@OP, sorry o. Such is life.

But after two years together, you should have known some of his family members, haba!

You didn't want to accept reality because you certainly suspected things were not straight.

But when in love, one ignores many things.

Better for you to move on, albeit painfully.
Do you want to ruin another lady's joy? Would it stop her marrying him? He can claim you were just "his mistake". Why hurt yourself even more? Luckily you're not like 7 months preggy or already have a kid. Dust yourself up and move on.
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by AreaFada2: 2:28am On Aug 22, 2015
eme40rald:
Hello nairalanders

It is with sadness and hurt that I decided to ask guidance on what action I should take with regards to the event that happened in my life.

I met a guy two years ago and fell in love with him wholeheartedly in fact he is my first love. the relationship was fun and romantic. I lost my innocence to him. Although there were times I had suspicions and I would confront him about it but he always found a way to clear my suspicions. One issue I always felt bad about was that he never took me to his family. As at the beginning of the relationship about a month into it his sister got married and I was not invited I felt maybe it was too early and shrugged it off. he never used my pictures as dp claiming he doesn't feel its proper until we are married. apart from all these he was a sweet and loving man. we were like best friends.

Fast forward to two years later I did something I had never done before. I searched his phone while he was asleep and what I discovered was a blow for me. He was in another relationship!!! I stole the girl's contact and disguised as his colleague just to get information from her with time she was free with me. I discovered they had been dating for seven years and she lived in another state. just last week he said he was travelling for a business event only for me to find out he went for his introduction to her family.

confronted him and he has been begging me to forgive him.

Kind hearted nairalanders please what do I do? should I expose him to the girl or not.

Wait o. In November last year, you said you have been dating for 6 months. When you were in doubt if to ask for financial help from him. 16 months is not quite up to 2 years ma. grin
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by inote: 2:44am On Aug 22, 2015
Hi for you to spy on his phone while he was sleeping, and for you to lie about your identity, makes you a bigger lier and u just lost your place in his life. Fine if you expose him, it will or may cost more harm, and you already know that they have been dating for like seven years now so they might not break up as you think. So my honest advice is that leave them alone God should be the judge. But please don't hid your identity next time.
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by clockwize: 3:02am On Aug 22, 2015
You gat no standards and requirement and you did nt made him leave with ur set of rules bt d other lady did that's y he played by her rules. U dnt really knw wot u want. U were lawless. The lady that was still far away still got him becus she made the rules and set some standards that worked for her even on her behalf. We'll for me jst work away quitely n learn from ur mistake. Cus men value standard please go get some Thanks
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Nobody: 3:07am On Aug 22, 2015
He probably kept you as a side chic! Sorry babes, you were his backup plan! Just move on, karma will catch up with him!!!!
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Nobody: 3:08am On Aug 22, 2015
witnezHD:
what's her innocence.... dead curious

LMFAO... I wonder oh....it means her virginity!!!! I guess she ain't innocent no more!!!
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Classicman47(m): 3:10am On Aug 22, 2015
On Nov. 6, 2014 this same lady posted a topic asking if it was right to request money from her then boyfriend. In the post she claimed to have been dating the guy for 6months which means, according to my calculation, that they met sometime around June dat year.

Now, today Aug. 21 2015 she is here again with a bigger question, asking if it is right to expose the man for having been playing with her. Now she says she has been with the guy for 2 YEARS!

My question to her, and of course to Nlders is, is it the same guy you are talking about If yes, then how does the timing correspond to two years Or do you have a way of "fast-forwarding" time But if your answer is NO, then I put it to you that you lack the moral ground to complain bcuz you have been cheating too. My reason being that considering the time frame, if this incident happened this year, then obviously you have been with this guy you wish to expose long before you met the other man you were considering begging money from(in order for the timing to be correct since you said 2 years ago. 2 years ago shld be like Aug, 2013). And you dated the two simultaneously. So you are also a cheat.

This is my analysis. You can sue me if you are offended. Thank you.
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by likila: 3:18am On Aug 22, 2015
YES
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by Evarock(f): 4:01am On Aug 22, 2015
Begging u to stay or what?
Re: Should I Expose Him To His Fiancee? by delors(m): 4:04am On Aug 22, 2015
But then search yourself, u knew all along something was wrong. For 2 years, he never introduced you to his parents, kept the relationship secret, you guys were banging your brains out, etc something, somewhere at some point would have told you this guy had nothing for you. But u kept in deceiving yourself? It amazes me.

If you expose him, it benefits no one but actually benefit him and his fiancee. If they v been together for 9yrs(?) or so, she would def forgive him and still marry him although it may be delayed.
So I'll advice you let it go. He may come back at some point if you guys are meant to be together (but I doubt that).

Leave him and move on sis. It's all a lesson.

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (12) (Reply)

10 Reasons Why Most Ladies Will Never Remain Virgins Till Marriage / I Gave My Boyfriend N500k, Has He Duped Me? / The 7 Most Common Lies Women Tell In Relationships

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 79
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.