What Could Be The Cause Of This? - Romance - Nairaland
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| What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 7:43am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Hi guys, happy Sunday to you all. just decided to post this to see if I could get a few differing views. Am a young guy in my late 20's planning to settle down at 30 max. The issue is; I see a girl am attracted to, make moves on her, we start dating, few weeks down the line, every atom of affection fades away. This has consistently happened, and this year alone I have been in and out of 4 relationships. This is not about me being after sex, cos I was never sexually involved with any of them. I am getting bothered because they seem right at the onset but then I realise I don't feel enough to spend the rest of my life with them. Needless to say I am broken by the hurt I might cause this ladies but it's my future and I have got to be careful. Please can anyone relate with this? |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Nobody: 7:50am On Oct 18, 2015 |
You're forcing it. Don't. 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Nobody: 7:50am On Oct 18, 2015 |
You are sentenced to life in singlehood! so u won't break our sisters hearts again! Court!!!! |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Nobody: 7:58am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Neither you nor the girls is perfect, find a good girl and correct are flaws,,, shape her to what you desire 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by FruityLass: 7:59am On Oct 18, 2015 |
I can relate to that.....I think its chemistry we felt the first time and was not necessarily real love. It causes us to step back and realize maybe that it isn’t what we really want. 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by yomi007k(m): 8:00am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Welcome to my world. Who says u must marry at 30yrs max? Why u putting so much pressure on urself wen nobody is pressurizing u? U obviously need 2 relax ntake things slow. #john legend 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 8:02am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Oyind17: Lol, God forbid. |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Beesluv: 8:05am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Prayers and tolerance |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 8:07am On Oct 18, 2015 |
RickRichards: Bros I don't think so, cos my target should make me stick with one and get married asap. |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Nobody: 8:08am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Just get a lady, correct her flaws and you good to go, if not if you looking for the perfect one, then I'm sorry, you will keep looking till you probably grow old.  1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by IamLEGEND1: 8:10am On Oct 18, 2015 |
1 Like
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| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Gibsonworld05(m): 8:11am On Oct 18, 2015 |
I will comment later |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 8:16am On Oct 18, 2015 |
yomi007k: wise post. Thanks, also I noticed that I stuck with one babe throughout my uni days, perhaps because there was no expectation from the relationship and could bear anything. But now that am conscious that whatever I engage in now leads to something bigger makes me sceptical. I guess am having marriage jitters. Abeg our married folks, wetin dey this marriage thing sef? |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by macaranta(m): 8:17am On Oct 18, 2015 |
You're probably looking for a perfect girl.A wife is someone who you can live with their flaws(and probably make them better),not someone who doesn't have a flaw. 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Nobody: 8:18am On Oct 18, 2015 |
It only makes sense to set a time for marriage when you've found the woman of your dreams. Keep looking out for her, that unique lady is out there. 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 8:19am On Oct 18, 2015 |
IamLEGEND1:Please go to church today.  |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by yomi007k(m): 8:26am On Oct 18, 2015 |
gradeA:U welcome. Nothing much dey marriage. Na just another level of life where one will becom responsible 4 a whole lot. Life is in stages  ideally)1.Dependent- neonatal to adolescent 2.Interdependent- adolescent/adult 3.Independent- adult 4."Supradependent"- married. Lol But many people never make it past stage 2 psychologically. They just marry for d title. Dem no knw say d title comes with a price. 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 8:27am On Oct 18, 2015 |
FruityLass: Yeah maybe, so what do you advise, how are we sure it's truly love and not just chemistry? |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Nobody: 8:28am On Oct 18, 2015 |
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| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Exponental(m): 8:30am On Oct 18, 2015 |
1. If you believe in prayer, ask God for a wife. 2. Don't expect a perfect woman, you have a job to redefine her to your taste 3. Deadline is not necessary & advisable, it will cause you to rush which might lead to regrets, your deadline might not give sufficient time to know the needful. 4. Take your time, courtship helps to understand yourselves. Early courtship mostly is full of deceit. You tend to do things to please yourselves. 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 8:31am On Oct 18, 2015 |
firstEVA: hmmmm. Makes sense. but for someone that has always set time-bound targets from adolescence, it could be difficult. |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 8:36am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Beesluv:Ok, thanks. but I dey pray well well sha. |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Beesluv: 8:39am On Oct 18, 2015 |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Beesluv: 8:40am On Oct 18, 2015 |
IamLEGEND1: So he should marry for uku's sake |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Nobody: 8:47am On Oct 18, 2015 |
gradeA:Hehehe..I don talk my own |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 8:47am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Beesluv: I feel there is a limit to what one should tolerate. If I start tolerating trash now, imagine the bulls*** that would be thrown at my face when I marry her. |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by IamLEGEND1: 8:48am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Beesluv:
|
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Beesluv: 8:51am On Oct 18, 2015 |
gradeA: No one is perfect |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 9:13am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Exponental: Noted. very insightful, thanks. |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by FruityLass: 9:16am On Oct 18, 2015 |
gradeA:Well, I think chemistry is just a physical response to one another. Love is about friendship, respect, humor and the feelings of warmth and contentment that come when you are in his/her presence which is more of chemistry. You stop worrying that your partner might change their mind if they see the real you. 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by Nobody: 9:30am On Oct 18, 2015 |
If you are really like that, the only solution is to fall in love, what most Nigerians do when they are ready to get married is just to look for someone, someone they might be temporarily attracted to, without knowing it, even though I have just spent two years in my twenties, I can't fathom the idea of living with ' just a lady' for the rest of my life, drop the conventional method of going out to look for ladies because of pressures and deadlines, as for me, if I don't fall in love, I will never get married but I will still be fulfilled in life. 1 Like |
| Re: What Could Be The Cause Of This? by gradeA(m): 9:40am On Oct 18, 2015 |
Oyind17:Oyind17 if na play, stop am ooo. I love women so much to remain single.  |
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