kola1930:
We've been married for a year now and blessed with a pretty daughter. My wife feels little or no urge to be intimate. Its been more than a month now since I had s*x. Reason being that, am angry inside of me that she is always not in the mood, so I decided to hold myself and see when she'll realize it that am angry about it and do the needful. But it seems like am just suffering my self because she seems not to realize she needs to do something fast. I am feeling like cheating on her as a way to punish her maybe she'll realize it that she needs to satisfy her husband to keep him away from other ladies outside. I urgently need advice from married nairalanders... Is the situation d same or similar in ur marriage, and how do I resolve this differences. Am really disturbed

smartigo:
^^^ what has it got to do with the issue on ground? Pesin way don born for am? Maybe the man is stinking or not good in bed? These r just 'maybes'.

@op let me know serious with you now. How are you contemplating of cheating on her becos of ONE MONTH abstinence except you are selfish. you need to get real and solve this problem by Communicating your feelings and understand her problem. Should she also apply the same method?
Are you sure she ain't getting it somewhere else.
How are you sure she isnt feeling this same?
Many things could be affecting her like stress, hormonal changes etc.
Lastly, this just started, so try n check you didn't cause it as the first step to resolving it. Cheers!

Ahmed0336:
were her eyes closed when he married her?

Pidggin:
Are you physically attractive?

deen11:
I feel u man! Just keep understudying her,and sure you would get her weakness...

Surprise her with many things...vis-a-vis
Looking good and smelling nice
Assisting with house chores as far as u could
Buying her gifts
Taking her out to whr she hasn't been before
Engaging her with sensational talks and so on
.......the list is endless man.

Don't be discouraged and I hope one will work out except if she is no longer interested in the union. Best of luck!!!!!

Pidggin:
Are you physically attractive?

Pidggin:
Are you physically attractive?

kola1930:
We've been married for a year now and blessed with a pretty daughter. My wife feels little or no urge to be intimate. Its been more than a month now since I had s*x. Reason being that, am angry inside of me that she is always not in the mood, so I decided to hold myself and see when she'll realize it that am angry about it and do the needful. But it seems like am just suffering my self because she seems not to realize she needs to do something fast. I am feeling like cheating on her as a way to punish her maybe she'll realize it that she needs to satisfy her husband to keep him away from other ladies outside. I urgently need advice from married nairalanders... Is the situation d same or similar in ur marriage, and how do I resolve this differences. Am really disturbed

Pidggin:
Are you physically attractive?

halfricanadian:


Exactly my thought

anuma1:
second wife is allowed

Onegai:


Dude, you sound so.....gosh, what's the word...selfish. Yes. Selfish.

Plus you're most going to throw your marriage, peace of mind and happiness away, hurt your child irrevocably, scare your wife away in the near future. All the best, there are a lot of unhappy divorced naija man out there (i used to think they were all balling but strangely they all hate being single).

Seriously.

You didn't bother communicating with her, most likely didn't put any effort into romancing your woman, you're now sulking mentally and decided the best way to "punish" her is by cheating?

She doesn't want to sleep with you because she already is taking care of one small baby, she didn't realise she married another immature baby.

So something has cropped up in your marriage and instead of you to look for a good way to fix it, make your union strong, make society be impressed by your principled stand to keep to your vows and earn your wife's love and loyalty forever, you wrote this??

Mstchewwww.

You better go and get someone to come and carry that baby for a few hours. Then take your wife to a guesthouse and let her sleep for a bit, get your lust satisfied and THEN speak up about how you understand it's exhausting being a new mum and you're here for her but you didn't like being ignored whilst she lost herself in her role because you need her too and will always be willing to support and carry your weight around the house.

Or you can do whatever you want...

tosyne2much:
For your mind you don give advice abi? Your comment reeks of arrogance and insult and you think you have offered the best advice shey?


And to think a man has to undergo all you posted just to be compensated with sex clearly shows how clueless you are. Smh


Op... Well, I'm not married so I'm not experienced in this aspect. I just hope more experienced married men can help you find a solution

kola1930:
We've been married for a year now and blessed with a pretty daughter. My wife feels little or no urge to be intimate. Its been more than a month now since I had s*x. Reason being that, am angry inside of me that she is always not in the mood, so I decided to hold myself and see when she'll realize it that am angry about it and do the needful. But it seems like am just suffering my self because she seems not to realize she needs to do something fast. I am feeling like cheating on her as a way to punish her maybe she'll realize it that she needs to satisfy her husband to keep him away from other ladies outside. I urgently need advice from married nairalanders... Is the situation d same or similar in ur marriage, and how do I resolve this differences. Am really disturbed

Thylord:
y na

assana:
tenk u Austine u just hit the nail on the head, am also a victim. God bless ur comment.

pet4ril:
If you are very sure you haven't done anything wrong to offend her, put her in prayers it may be spiritual husband stuff or better of, you people should visit a man of God for counseling

kachi19:
OMG!! :/ Do u need God to tell u first or do u want somtin to do u first?? You're a Contract mehn, and your wife is a damn GAY!! So... The thing now on board is who'll drop the Divorce jamz first (you can hire yung john as ur advocate)

Acidosis:


Would you ignore your husband for 1 month?

kola1930:
We've been married for a year now and blessed with a pretty daughter. My wife feels little or no urge to be intimate. Its been more than a month now since I had s*x. Reason being that, am angry inside of me that she is always not in the mood, so I decided to hold myself and see when she'll realize it that am angry about it and do the needful. But it seems like am just suffering my self because she seems not to realize she needs to do something fast. I am feeling like cheating on her as a way to punish her maybe she'll realize it that she needs to satisfy her husband to keep him away from other ladies outside. I urgently need advice from married nairalanders... Is the situation d same or similar in ur marriage, and how do I resolve this differences. Am really disturbed

komododragons:
FOOLISH!

if you are married! stop opening your leg to your husband and be giving silly complains. and par adventure he do get what you are closing outside, take a knife and stabbed him on his neck

this is how divorce is everywhere because of you female. you think the world revolve around you shay? you haven't know anything just yet

GogobiriLalas:
l knew one yeye gal will come here to start talking crap and giving advice on matters she can't begin to even grasp the depth of...you bera gerouta here

Pidggin:
Are you physically attractive?

400billionman:


My dear, you dey see how some ladies reason. Defending the indefensible..

A woman starves her huuby for one month and she is not dumb and she cant say what is wrong with her.

hopara1:
My dear some wife are like that,give her money to prepare Ur best meal 4 U,then refuse to it.she will get worried n that will start d emotional reconciliation.Then pour out all Ur mind 4 her to know.I bliv d change will start!

Sheggy13:

Even the Bible says explicitly that wives do not deny your husband intimacy except for when you're both fasting. The husband that has gone out probably since 5am in the face of heavy Lagos traffic, chasing the daily bread both of you will enjoy and comes home late isn't stressed up too abi? How can someone keep turning down the sexual advances of a man you're married to for up to a month without any cogent reason. Later they'll end up in church praying needless prayers about God helping to take control of the husband when they've succeeded in pushing him outside,for those that cannot bear it again. That's why it's important for people in relationships to discuss their sex life and how often they feel like getting it before ending up marriage. Any lady I date, it's usually one of the first things I let her realize so if she can't cope, she can find her way early enough to avoid stories like this. Don't allow the advice of stupid girls who can't keep a marriage for more than a year cos of their warped orientation deceive you into having problems with your husband. They're quite much on this thread. You know them from their comments and the cheap likes they get from their fellow senseless companions. Use your head sis and save your marriage. A word is enough.