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GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently - Romance (3) - Nairaland

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Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 2:02pm On Jun 24, 2016
covbrand:



you always speak like a kid that knows nothing about emotional discipline. who tells their next that their ex was their true love? NOBODY IS IRREPLACEABLE. and op, people only hurt you when you give them that power, learn to love with a healthy level of detachment. when I was younger I always felt showing people how much you loved them was the trick to keeping them,but the older you grow the more you realise that NOBODY loves an over expressive person. Op as for that lady, leave her because she has already lost respect for you, no amount of begging can correct that. this is the best time to find yourself and know what you want, pain is one of the fastest way to aquire maturity. I pray God gives you the fortitude to grow. more grace.
thanks a lot dear
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by foolinlove(f): 2:09pm On Jun 24, 2016
covbrand:



you always speak like a kid that knows nothing about emotional discipline. who tells their next that their ex was their true love? NOBODY IS IRREPLACEABLE. and op, people only hurt you when you give them that power, learn to love with a healthy level of detachment. when I was younger I always felt showing people how much you loved them was the trick to keeping them,but the older you grow the more you realise that NOBODY loves an over expressive person. Op as for that lady, leave her because she has already lost respect for you, no amount of begging can correct that. this is the best time to find yourself and know what you want, pain is one of the fastest way to aquire maturity. I pray God gives you the fortitude to grow. more grace.

I disagree. I don't think people are commodities and can just be "replaced". Example: my parents can't be replaced. And I feel sorry for anyone who keeps such a detachment from others that you really don't get to know what makes a person UNIQUELY THEM. An irreplaceable individual who is special.

I'm not saying be over-expressive, I'm saying be honest - you don't want someone to get the wrong idea about how you feel. If you are not honest then you intentionally hurt someone that doesn't deserve to be hurt.

3 Likes

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by murphyibiam15(m): 2:21pm On Jun 24, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise
you dont need advise dude...u prefer pussy pass your life.....just look at yourself.
is obvious u are sick....!

1 Like

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by murphyibiam15(m): 2:25pm On Jun 24, 2016
amaraedec:
I really appreciate Bro, I have got a job. I don't want this to affect my carreer.
dude get a life....i personally no de pity u.....u prefer pussy pass ur life...just negodi.
affect your work ko,affect your balls ni

1 Like

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 3:15pm On Jun 24, 2016
murphyibiam15:

dude get a life....i personally no de pity u.....u prefer pussy pass ur life...just negodi.
affect your work ko,affect your balls ni
thanks Bro

1 Like

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by oodua1stson: 3:27pm On Jun 24, 2016
You wanted to end your life because of a girl who would be smashing another guy even before you are buried?



I have nothing to tell you because i may end up insulting you

3 Likes

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by naniawini(f): 3:52pm On Jun 24, 2016
torqque7:
Hmmm I feel your pain tho..we've all been through heartbreaks and it's no fun at all but you need to understand that she is NOT worth it..you are not even dead yet and she is cheating and hurting you already so do you think it will get better when you kill yourself?my brother she will be under another guy screaming his name on the day of your burial so ask yourself who is at a loss here?

Maxti is right..unfortunately never fall in love completely with ANY woman as a man cos you'll get burnt badly..love is sweet but our girls have turned it into a cat and mouse game of survival of the fitest..be smart meet other females,get laid,hell fvck prostitutes if necessary just get other females in your life so you can forget the bi.tch and you'll be OK,trust me when I tell you there are tons of females out there FAR better than her in EVERY aspect of life,and you will meet one again that will make you believe in love again dn't worry,it's just a matter of time. .

Remember no sentiments attached o if you want to survive this game of emotions..drop that idea that you can't cheat on her and stop the good boy routine cos that's your major problem..Good luck Bro.
lol! U harsh ooo! Good boy routine ke?
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by naniawini(f): 3:57pm On Jun 24, 2016
Op u've heard it all. An adage says d ear dat will hear shud nt be as big as a house. Dnt eva try taking ur own life 4 any reason. As 4 d gal 4get abt her wen I mean 4get, 4get anytin dat concerns cos she's nt gonna change instead she'll hurt u d more. Move on wit ur life it's nt d end, u'll stil find beta gals out dia dat wil return ur luv ok!

And always pray 2 God 2 lead u 2 d ryt one.


Bless u!
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Richy4(m): 3:59pm On Jun 24, 2016
I seriously hate advising people on relationship issues..... The reason why u were in it was to be happy isn't it? If she cheats on u and makes u sad.. why are u still holding on....

You just finished NYSC and u have already started drinking antidepressant drugs at this age. so how long will u continue...

All I kind of feel is that u are looking for someone that will replace your mum or someone that will "mother u" once again but news flash!! there is no girl out there that is ready for that... the best u can get is a best friend who will maybe later be your future wife.

I am really not happy with u for trying to kill yourself.
imagine going for lectures for 4yrs, doing all the horrible assignments in school, all the stress on everyday life. only to throw it away for some girl who is not even miss world or even miss nairaland.
Biko move on...

5 Likes

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 4:20pm On Jun 24, 2016
naniawini:
Op u've heard it all. An adage says d ear dat will hear shud nt be as big as a house. Dnt eva try taking ur own life 4 any reason. As 4 d gal 4get abt her wen I mean 4get, 4get anytin dat concerns cos she's nt gonna change instead she'll hurt u d more. Move on wit ur life it's nt d end, u'll stil find beta gals out dia dat wil return ur luv ok!

And always pray 2 God 2 lead u 2 d ryt one.


Bless u!
Bless you dear
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by torqque7(m): 4:24pm On Jun 24, 2016
naniawini:
lol! U harsh ooo! Good boy routine ke?

Lol..not harsh,just plain truth..when a woman sees you as a goodboy she automatically believes you are weak and can be used anyhow. Only grown mature females that are reasonable appreciate good guys,you self know,una no the try for guys at all at all lol..

2 Likes

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by idu1(m): 4:40pm On Jun 24, 2016
amaraedec:
thanks, thanks a lot. I appreciate.
so, you really want to kill yourself?
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by nnamdi1993: 4:41pm On Jun 24, 2016
Idiot, u shld av died

1 Like

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by naniawini(f): 4:43pm On Jun 24, 2016
Na tru u talk. Sum gals sha
torqque7:


Lol..not harsh,just plain truth..when a woman sees you as a goodboy she automatically believes you are weak and can be used anyhow. Only grown mature females that are reasonable appreciate good guys,you self know,una no the try for guys at all at all lol..

3 Likes

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 5:04pm On Jun 24, 2016
nnamdi1993:
Idiot, u shld av died
thanks Bro. I appreciate
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by schumastic(m): 5:05pm On Jun 24, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise


OP YOU ARE A VERY BIG FOOL FOR TRYING TO TAKE YOUR LIFE BECAUSE OF A LADY...can one imagine the rubbish he is saying..gosh to think is a whor that is driving you nuts is an embarrasment to manhood..is either you cut of those balls of yours or you grab them and get yourself another lady, this time around make sure you have side chicks(lots of them)..i wish i was your bro bro, I would knock some sense into you.

5 Likes

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 5:06pm On Jun 24, 2016
idu1:
so, you really want to kill yourself?
just needed an advice. Think I have heard enough
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 5:08pm On Jun 24, 2016
schumastic:



OP YOU ARE A VERY BIG FOOL FOR TRYING TO TAKE YOUR LIFE BECAUSE OF A LADY...can one imagine the rubbish he is saying..gosh to think is a whor that is driving you nuts is an embarrasment to manhood..is either you cut of those balls of yours or you grab them and get yourself another lady, this time around make sure you have side chicks(lots of them)..i wish i was your bro bro, I would knock some sense into you.
thanks Bro
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by W3irDo: 5:10pm On Jun 24, 2016
Oh
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Silas0(m): 5:11pm On Jun 24, 2016
If life can take away someone you never thought of losing then life can definitely replace them with someone you never thought of having.

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by W3irDo: 5:11pm On Jun 24, 2016

1 Like

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by nnamdi1993: 5:14pm On Jun 24, 2016
amaraedec:
thanks Bro. I appreciate
am sorry bro...u jst made me look like a fool.ur indeed mature so y did u even attempt suicide.from wat u say d gal na flirt,so is ur life less valued dan a flirt ?b wise brro

3 Likes

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Chuksemi(m): 5:15pm On Jun 24, 2016
amaraedec:
I have not spoken to anyone about my ordeal but I sincerely hope your advice will go a long way towards healing me and restoring back my sanity.

I started dating this lady whom I still love so much February 2013, few months before I lost my mummy. I was so cautious of the affair at first, knowing that it was the first time I am getting so emotionally entangled to a lady, but after I lost my mum, I was so hurt and the fact that she was the only person very close to me then, I threw caution to the wind and fell helplessly in love with her, hoping that it would help alleviate the pains of losing My mum and praying deep inside my heart that the relationship will lead to marriage. It did to a reasonable extent alleviated the pains of losing my mum.

Even while I was in school, I gave her everything that I somehow lived in deprivation. Her friends were complaining to me that I spend a lot on her and it might backfire one day. I ignored their advice. I buy her handouts, clothes, Mobile gadgets and even give her certain amount of money on monthly basis to add up to her feeding money, I made sure she lived above her peers in school .

The whole problem started late 2014, when I was about leaving for my NYSC. she started acting quite strange, I respected her privacy that I don't even touch her phones, even though I give her the freedom to handle my phones and answer my calls. I noticed she wouldn't pick up her calls while with me. Like I said, I respected her privacy that I never gave so much thoughts into her actions, I loved and gave her my all believing that she will never cheat on me. Then on her birthday, I had got lots of surprising gifts for her and even arranged a little get together without her knowledge. To my greatest surprise, she surfaced at the venue of the party with the excuse that she was going on an errand for her parents. I handed over to her the gifts I got for her, she collected them and left the venue. Little did I know she had gone to see her erstwhile lover. Depression had started creeping in and I was losing my sanity apparently.

To cut the whole story short, when her girlfriend opened up to me that my girl was having affairs elsewhere, I never believed her at first, but after I confronted her, then I was looking so sick and pale, completely lost in thoughts and pains. She eventually opened up and was really sorry to the best of my knowledge . I couldn't help the pains, I. Started taking anti depressants, I have already vowed never to cheat in my life, knowing that prosperity has a way of rewarding Fidelity.

After I was mobilized for NYSC, I left for my Camp, but the ghost of a failed relationship was already hunting me, I had lost interest in living. Shortly after I returned back from my Orientation camp, everyone knew something was wrong with me, I only told them that it was the stress from Camp. Well, I was battered emotionally, that on 31st December 2014, I hit the rock button and decided to end my life and end the pains, I took insecticides and collection of anti depressants in over dose and battery acid, I cheated on death as I was in Coma for 4 days, I was referred to a psychologist for rehabilitation after I was discharged on the 12th of January 2015. I spent 6 months in rehabilitation Center here in Lagos State, where I was also serving then.

After the whole incident, I made up my mind to forgive her and give her a second chance since she was really sorry. The whole scenario started replaying itself, that she started acting strange again, already my friend had told me that she was seeing someone else. My family knew I was slipping into depression again and had wanted to fly me out of the country, but I was denied Visa when I least expected it. I had to leave Enugu for Lagos so as to keep away from her and the environment. but she still calls me on phone, saying that she still loves me, I truly love her so much. Am totally lost of words, lost of ideas. Am terrified to say the least. Am losing my sanity again. Please friends, depression is getting better of me at the moment.. I need a sincere advise

Op. Get another girlfriend.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 5:19pm On Jun 24, 2016
nnamdi1993:
am sorry bro...u jst made me look like a fool.ur indeed mature so y did u even attempt suicide.from wat u say d gal na flirt,so is ur life less valued dan a flirt ?b wise brro
depression, I will shake it off, you guys are really wonderful

1 Like

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by schumastic(m): 5:29pm On Jun 24, 2016
amaraedec:
thanks Bro

don't thank me yet till you come back and tell me you have gotten another lady..incase you don't know, ladies r 3x if not more than the guys around..

2 Likes

Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Ugogabriel(m): 5:38pm On Jun 24, 2016
you are a man and you need to be strong. don't allow ur emotions to play down on you. try to see if you can make anoda gal jst a Frnd. it will help u a lot.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 6:10pm On Jun 24, 2016
Chuksemi:

Op. Get another girlfriend.
thanks Bro, I appreciate
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 6:11pm On Jun 24, 2016
Ugogabriel:
you are a man and you need to be strong. don't allow ur emotions to play down on you. try to see if you can make anoda gal jst a Frnd. it will help u a lot.
thanks Bro. May you find happiness
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 6:12pm On Jun 24, 2016
schumastic:


don't thank me yet till you come back and tell me you have gotten another lady..incase you don't know, ladies r 3x if not more than the guys around..
funny, you guys are really wonderful
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 6:37pm On Jun 24, 2016
Richy4:
I seriously hate advising people on relationship issues..... The reason why u were in it was to be happy isn't it? If she cheats on u and makes u sad.. why are u still holding on....

You just finished NYSC and u have already started drinking antidepressant drugs at this age. so how long will u continue...

All I kind of feel is that u are looking for someone that will replace your mum or someone that will "mother u" once again but news flash!! there is no girl out there that is ready for that... the best u can get is a best friend who will maybe later be your future wife.

I am really not happy with u for trying to kill yourself.
imagine going for lectures for 4yrs, doing all the horrible assignments in school, all the stress on everyday life. only to throw it away for some girl who is not even miss world or even miss nairaland.
Biko move on...
thanks so much. I greatly appreciate
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by pennytration(m): 6:37pm On Jun 24, 2016
amaraedec:
I really appreciate Bro, I have got a job. I don't want this to affect my carreer.
U'll get over it, its just a matter of time trust me. I've been there b4. D mistaake u made was falling in love and trusting a woman. Learn frm it. Dont repeat such mistake, and u'll be fine.
Re: GOING THROUGH A DEVASTATING BREAK UP. Please Help Me Friends!! Am Dying Silently by Nobody: 6:41pm On Jun 24, 2016
pennytration:
U'll get over it, its just a matter of time trust me. I've been there b4. D mistaake u made was falling in love and trusting a woman. Learn frm it. Dont repeat such mistake, and u'll be fine.
thanks a million

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