₦airaland Forum

willibounce1:
Mr. Akpan...oniranu

seizethaBae:
I don't even know where to start or how to explain what my problem is, hopefully i get lucky for the 'problem' to be 'diagnosed'. I'm a 27yrs old lady, finished university very very early and i've been extremely lucky with almost everything in life, but to get a suitor and settle down na palava. Friends/family members keep saying I'm too choosy or not serious.

Honestly, I AM NOT choosy. When the one thing i fast/pray for is for God to link me with the bone of my bone very soon, I even gave up my travelling plans in order to increase my chances of finding a future patner (i know you can meet ur patner anywhere, but na just to shut up people wey don tink say i no dey serious), a close friend even suggested i pend my 'work-from-home business', look for job so i can be leaving the house, and i got lucky within a month or two of dusting my CV i got a fantastic high paid job with no connection (honestly i've always been so lucky when i ask God for anything but i have no idea why he is delaying this). I just dont know how to explain it, the ones i like doesnt like me and the ones i dont have single feelings for will do anything to wife me. I'm not desperate or something, i just want to reach out if I'm the only one having this problem.

There was even a time i made up my mind to accept an ex proposal even tho i have no single feeling for him, i kept hoping/fasting/praying for a miracle to happen so i can at least like him (even if its 20%) bcus hes just too PERFECT, but it didn't just happen. My type of man doesnt need to be extremely rich, tall, handsome like most ladies dream man. He should just be neat, God fearing and have something upstairs biko (i love intelligent guys). Back to the main reason why i created this post; Married women/mature lady out there, has this ever happen to you? I really envy people that love their partners and they are loved back equally. Married women, please, I'm waiting to hear from you.

And for most people that will think I'm looking for a rich guy, believe me i once met a guy that was willing to sponsor my M.Sc in UK if i can be his Mrs, but i will never engage in anything that will bring curse on my head. So my problem is not even money. I'm so sick and tired

seizethaBae:
I don't even know where to start or how to explain what my problem is, hopefully i get lucky for the 'problem' to be 'diagnosed'. I'm a 27yrs old lady, finished university very very early and i've been extremely lucky with almost everything in life, but to get a suitor and settle down na palava. Friends/family members keep saying I'm too choosy or not serious.

Honestly, I AM NOT choosy. When the one thing i fast/pray for is for God to link me with the bone of my bone very soon, I even gave up my travelling plans in order to increase my chances of finding a future patner (i know you can meet ur patner anywhere, but na just to shut up people wey don tink say i no dey serious), a close friend even suggested i pend my 'work-from-home business', look for job so i can be leaving the house, and i got lucky within a month or two of dusting my CV i got a fantastic high paid job with no connection (honestly i've always been so lucky when i ask God for anything but i have no idea why he is delaying this). I just dont know how to explain it, the ones i like doesnt like me and the ones i dont have single feelings for will do anything to wife me. I'm not desperate or something, i just want to reach out if I'm the only one having this problem.

There was even a time i made up my mind to accept an ex proposal even tho i have no single feeling for him, i kept hoping/fasting/praying for a miracle to happen so i can at least like him (even if its 20%) bcus hes just too PERFECT, but it didn't just happen. My type of man doesnt need to be extremely rich, tall, handsome like most ladies dream man. He should just be neat, God fearing and have something upstairs biko (i love intelligent guys). Back to the main reason why i created this post; Married women/mature lady out there, has this ever happen to you? I really envy people that love their partners and they are loved back equally. Married women, please, I'm waiting to hear from you.

And for most people that will think I'm looking for a rich guy, believe me i once met a guy that was willing to sponsor my M.Sc in UK if i can be his Mrs, but i will never engage in anything that will bring curse on my head. So my problem is not even money. I'm so sick and tired

seizethaBae:
if u guys no d level of my seriousness walah iu wont take it as a joke. shams040 im not here to look for patner/husband but to find experience pple to diagnose what could be wrong with me or if it happens to most ladies before they settle down. Experience pple pls respond plsssss

seizethaBae:
I don't even know where to start or how to explain what my problem is, hopefully i get lucky for the 'problem' to be 'diagnosed'. I'm a 27yrs old lady, finished university very very early and i've been extremely lucky with almost everything in life, but to get a suitor and settle down na palava. Friends/family members keep saying I'm too choosy or not serious.

Honestly, I AM NOT choosy. When the one thing i fast/pray for is for God to link me with the bone of my bone very soon, I even gave up my travelling plans in order to increase my chances of finding a future patner (i know you can meet ur patner anywhere, but na just to shut up people wey don tink say i no dey serious), a close friend even suggested i pend my 'work-from-home business', look for job so i can be leaving the house, and i got lucky within a month or two of dusting my CV i got a fantastic high paid job with no connection (honestly i've always been so lucky when i ask God for anything but i have no idea why he is delaying this). I just dont know how to explain it, the ones i like doesnt like me and the ones i dont have single feelings for will do anything to wife me. I'm not desperate or something, i just want to reach out if I'm the only one having this problem.

There was even a time i made up my mind to accept an ex proposal even tho i have no single feeling for him, i kept hoping/fasting/praying for a miracle to happen so i can at least like him (even if its 20%) bcus hes just too PERFECT, but it didn't just happen. My type of man doesnt need to be extremely rich, tall, handsome like most ladies dream man. He should just be neat, God fearing and have something upstairs biko (i love intelligent guys). Back to the main reason why i created this post; Married women/mature lady out there, has this ever happen to you? I really envy people that love their partners and they are loved back equally. Married women, please, I'm waiting to hear from you.

And for most people that will think I'm looking for a rich guy, believe me i once met a guy that was willing to sponsor my M.Sc in UK if i can be his Mrs, but i will never engage in anything that will bring curse on my head. So my problem is not even money. I'm so sick and tired

seizethaBae:
I don't even know where to start or how to explain what my problem is, hopefully i get lucky for the 'problem' to be 'diagnosed'. I'm a 27yrs old lady, finished university very very early and i've been extremely lucky with almost everything in life, but to get a suitor and settle down na palava. Friends/family members keep saying I'm too choosy or not serious.

Honestly, I AM NOT choosy. When the one thing i fast/pray for is for God to link me with the bone of my bone very soon, I even gave up my travelling plans in order to increase my chances of finding a future patner (i know you can meet ur patner anywhere, but na just to shut up people wey don tink say i no dey serious), a close friend even suggested i pend my 'work-from-home business', look for job so i can be leaving the house, and i got lucky within a month or two of dusting my CV i got a fantastic high paid job with no connection (honestly i've always been so lucky when i ask God for anything but i have no idea why he is delaying this). I just dont know how to explain it, the ones i like doesnt like me and the ones i dont have single feelings for will do anything to wife me. I'm not desperate or something, i just want to reach out if I'm the only one having this problem.

There was even a time i made up my mind to accept an ex proposal even tho i have no single feeling for him, i kept hoping/fasting/praying for a miracle to happen so i can at least like him (even if its 20%) bcus hes just too PERFECT, but it didn't just happen. My type of man doesnt need to be extremely rich, tall, handsome like most ladies dream man. He should just be neat, God fearing and have something upstairs biko (i love intelligent guys). Back to the main reason why i created this post; Married women/mature lady out there, has this ever happen to you? I really envy people that love their partners and they are loved back equally. Married women, please, I'm waiting to hear from you.

And for most people that will think I'm looking for a rich guy, believe me i once met a guy that was willing to sponsor my M.Sc in UK if i can be his Mrs, but i will never engage in anything that will bring curse on my head. So my problem is not even money. I'm so sick and tired

Heartibaby:
My dear i understand perfectly how you feel. Ur post sounds like the story of my life. But NL is not the place to get meaningful advice AT ALL. There is a group on facebook called Female In Nigeria (FIN) that will really be helpful to u. I found a particular post there where thousands of Nigerian ladies were advising the younger ones on things they wished they had known before they got married. It was really refreshing to me. If u are interested u can email me ur fb ID so that can add u. U can only be added by a member. But im sure u have hundreds of fb contacts who are members
Many of the ladies there who had married early said they wished they had waited till thier late twenties or early thirties. I was quite surprised and their reasons opened my eyes.

Forget most of the comments people are writing here. They just dont get it. I dont think u are choosy, unserious or a former runs girl as someone here insinuated. I just beleive that everyone's life timetable is different. I too was done with university before i was 21, got a veey good job at 23. I am not perfect but i am not that bad. Have been in only 2 relationships before now, serious church girl, people say im pretty, by God's grace im intelligent, speak well and from a good family. But did marriage come immediately? No. At a point i felt there was something wrong with me. I even had a suitor who seemed perfect but i couldnt love at gun point. It was so bad that my mind will tune out 5 mins into our conversations. I found him that boring. I began to feel guilty, thinking i was passing up a great suitor. But i stood my ground, i cant be bored the rest of my life. I doubled my service to God and refused to be anxious abt marriage. And it happened when i wasnt even thinking abt it or looking for love. Softly someone i had known for a long time (secondary school) came back into my life. We clicked and connected and we are planning marriage. I am same age as u. So my dear i will advise u to get out there, meet people, be nice, be active on social media, pray, trust God and take ur mind off it. It will happen when ure not bothering abt it. I know its hard but force ur mind off it and no matter what dont settle. Its better to marry late than to marry wrong. Pray for God's guidance. There is nothing wrong with u. God bless u.

Cutehector:
Chronique

seizethaBae:
I don't even know where to start or how to

amunkita:
Ogboni
Don't tell me u re looking for sacrifice..

yuzedo:
Ah! The Marriage Topic. Everyone's favorite discourse.

Nne, you know the "what", now you need the "why" to find the "who"...

WHY do you want to get married? Really. Personally, when I thought I wanted to get married, it was on the premise of the Bible passage, "He who finds a wife finds a good thing - and obtains favor from the Lord."

.. I wanted that favor.

But you know what? The same Bible says God makes the sun/rain minister to both the righteous and unrighteous.

So? I had to retreat for increased introspection.

And you know what I realised?

You cannot pour from an empty cup.

Think about that for a second... Who are you? And why should another human being desire what you represent? Are you happy with your life? How can you attract a quality, balanced person if you can't offer as much? How can you make someone else happy if you aren't?? Does another person's child really deserve your less than 100%? Can you, as your Bible advocates, love your spouse as yourself, even as Christ loved the church??

When you are ready to love someone else as much as yourself, committed duly to serving that person forever, and in that light, equipping yourself with the requisite skills, resources and mentality to succeed in your resolve, then, the necessary (i.e. the Who) will manifest, and maybe all will be well with your world.

Salute.

- Yuzedo writes from Ikoyi, Lagos, and despite the many many Biblical references is still the one to fück a bıtch real quick without superogatory double-takes or frivolous moral encumbrances.

Gabby91:
Dear op, I do exactly what you mean. Like you, I finished school early @21 yrs. I'm 25, working and live alone. I am not rich but I can take care of the few needs I have (as long as I don't get greedy, I'm fine). I didn't play games in school for fear they'd come back to haunt me later. Now, I think I'm ready but I have not been fortunate to be 'toasted '. Only guys who want side chicks. I have this uncanny ability to fall for people who don't want me. I also seem to be a great friend, so I'm told, just not exactly the kind that inspires romance. I have friends both males and females, married and single. Just not that one special person. I get sad about it sometimes. Now, mostly I just ask God to turn it off, to turn this need/craving for something I might never have. I just ask for the meekness to learn to be content.

seizethaBae:
I don't even know where to start or how to explain what my problem is, hopefully i get lucky for the 'problem' to be 'diagnosed'. I'm a 27yrs old lady, finished university very very early and i've been extremely lucky with almost everything in life, but to get a suitor and settle down na palava. Friends/family members keep saying I'm too choosy or not serious.

Honestly, I AM NOT choosy. When the one thing i fast/pray for is for God to link me with the bone of my bone very soon, I even gave up my travelling plans in order to increase my chances of finding a future patner (i know you can meet ur patner anywhere, but na just to shut up people wey don tink say i no dey serious), a close friend even suggested i pend my 'work-from-home business', look for job so i can be leaving the house, and i got lucky within a month or two of dusting my CV i got a fantastic high paid job with no connection (honestly i've always been so lucky when i ask God for anything but i have no idea why he is delaying this). I just dont know how to explain it, the ones i like doesnt like me and the ones i dont have single feelings for will do anything to wife me. I'm not desperate or something, i just want to reach out if I'm the only one having this problem.

There was even a time i made up my mind to accept an ex proposal even tho i have no single feeling for him, i kept hoping/fasting/praying for a miracle to happen so i can at least like him (even if its 20%) bcus hes just too PERFECT, but it didn't just happen. My type of man doesnt need to be extremely rich, tall, handsome like most ladies dream man. He should just be neat, God fearing and have something upstairs biko (i love intelligent guys). Back to the main reason why i created this post; Married women/mature lady out there, has this ever happen to you? I really envy people that love their partners and they are loved back equally. Married women, please, I'm waiting to hear from you.

And for most people that will think I'm looking for a rich guy, believe me i once met a guy that was willing to sponsor my M.Sc in UK if i can be his Mrs, but i will never engage in anything that will bring curse on my head. So my problem is not even money. I'm so sick and tired

Gabby91:
Dear op, I do exactly what you mean. Like you, I finished school early @21 yrs. I'm 25, working and live alone. I am not rich but I can take care of the few needs I have (as long as I don't get greedy, I'm fine). I didn't play games in school for fear they'd come back to haunt me later. Now, I think I'm ready but I have not been fortunate to be 'toasted '. Only guys who want side chicks. I have this uncanny ability to fall for people who don't want me. I also seem to be a great friend, so I'm told, just not exactly the kind that inspires romance. I have friends both males and females, married and single. Just not that one special person. I get sad about it sometimes. Now, mostly I just ask God to turn it off, to turn this need/craving for something I might never have. I just ask for the meekness to learn to be content.

Chubhie:
You place premium on intelligence.Has it occurred to you that your ideal husband could be too busy locked away with passion in putting his intelligence to work?

Paths MUST be crossed either through angelic orchestration or self-help.

Dont appear desperate cos an intelligent dude can spot such from one mile radius.

Look for locations or places you feel your ideal intelligent dudes congregate and adapt to such environments.

Iron sharpens iron.you MUST first become that which you desperately seek.

It must be a give and take situation with that which you seek or you end up bored and miserable with them.

Can you be comfortable with a Seun sitting in front of his computer all day and coding in alien languages without having his bath?

You talk of an ex being all perfect yet you can't love him? You must understand that love is a fleeting sensation and barely enough to see you through marriage.

If that your ex ticks all the other boxes why not work on yourself and reconsider him?

You can not have everything on a plater of gold else that's rigging from your maker.

Perhaps,your maker is looking up to you to make this one decision.Such a wise God!

gidjah:
You will some day get married bae,you just need to get a lil bit more less strict and reduce your yard lines drawn.i wanna believe fine men come close,but your feelings ain't there,would you want the kind of person you will have feelings for or vice versa?,
Iife is not most times how we want it to get played,love grows with time too, the person you tend not to have feelings for today,might b d one your feelings gets strongest for with time ,that's how love grows .if it grows with time, it will stay permanent,you will have to let your love grow with some nice guy out there,watch it ,tend it,water it and watch it grow to stay forever.you are pretty young,that's why you are still feeling this way,but mind you ,age is never on your side,you grow old daily,watch it,I pray it does get better with you.gat an older sis who was just
LIke you,she started like you,finished her school very young ,na so we talk to her,she go say,'this one ,I don't have feelings for,''that one he is not minding me'..bla bla bla..to make the short story long,my older sis works with the accountant general of the federation as the head,she is well over fourty today but guys have stopped coming!,she is still there with all the comforts she has,was with 'aunty'few days ago, age no be here o, she told me she gets depressed dail over how she has been,and how she has treated guys,..with all the cars and affluence,na only married guys dey show for her side!.her pastor even asked her to keep her cars at home and start trekking may be boys will show up,...for were !!??

seizethaBae:
I don't even know where to start or how to explain what my problem is, hopefully i get lucky for the 'problem' to be 'diagnosed'. I'm a 27yrs old lady, finished university very very early and i've been extremely lucky with almost everything in life, but to get a suitor and settle down na palava. Friends/family members keep saying I'm too choosy or not serious.

Honestly, I AM NOT choosy. When the one thing i fast/pray for is for God to link me with the bone of my bone very soon, I even gave up my travelling plans in order to increase my chances of finding a future patner (i know you can meet ur patner anywhere, but na just to shut up people wey don tink say i no dey serious), a close friend even suggested i pend my 'work-from-home business', look for job so i can be leaving the house, and i got lucky within a month or two of dusting my CV i got a fantastic high paid job with no connection (honestly i've always been so lucky when i ask God for anything but i have no idea why he is delaying this). I just dont know how to explain it, the ones i like doesnt like me and the ones i dont have single feelings for will do anything to wife me. I'm not desperate or something, i just want to reach out if I'm the only one having this problem.

There was even a time i made up my mind to accept an ex proposal even tho i have no single feeling for him, i kept hoping/fasting/praying for a miracle to happen so i can at least like him (even if its 20%) bcus hes just too PERFECT, but it didn't just happen. My type of man doesnt need to be extremely rich, tall, handsome like most ladies dream man. He should just be neat, God fearing and have something upstairs biko (i love intelligent guys). Back to the main reason why i created this post; Married women/mature lady out there, has this ever happen to you? I really envy people that love their partners and they are loved back equally. Married women, please, I'm waiting to hear from you.

And for most people that will think I'm looking for a rich guy, believe me i once met a guy that was willing to sponsor my M.Sc in UK if i can be his Mrs, but i will never engage in anything that will bring curse on my head. So my problem is not even money. I'm so sick and tired