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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Pregnant And Depressed. (11894 Views)
Pregnant And Depressed / I'm So Confused And Depressed Over This / Great News For Pregnant And The Soon To Be Mothers(Books) (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 1:47pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
EfemenaXY: Thanks! I had the family here for Christmas. You know how much work that is to have so many people in your house but today we are leaving to visit friends and will stay there for one night so I will be the guest and relax while they will be serving some delicious food. My friend is a very good cook, like Cococandy, so I cannot wait to get there. I need to pack a few things now and we are ready to go. Yay! |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by bennyrazz: 1:50pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Mindfulness:I seriously don't know why you are changing the narrative. She got pregnant the first-time. Oh okay, its fine. it was a mistake but the second wasn't a mistake. she knows exactly what she is doing. The op had very easy labor and she had it easy when raising that one kid all by herself. So why not the second and why not the third? so many posters are encouraging her to keep on getting pregnant and raising children with no father figure, so @op, keep having sex, keep raising babies. it's the life you choose to live 2 Likes |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by EfemenaXY: 1:51pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
bennyrazz: Oh really?? Trying to kick a horse when it's down with vile, degrading words is meant to be corrective action?? Oya clap for yourself. bennyrazz: ...Kudos for getting pregnant and to keep spreading your legs open he says. Did you comprehend any part of her write-up at all? Did you or did you not understand she was in a relationship and had taken precautions?? Why do you think she took precautions? Do you understand the difference between being in a relationship vs having a fling?? Do you? 1 Like |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 1:52pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Mindfulness:You're comparing apples to oranges. Op needs to comprehend the gravity of her actions, we don't want her making the same mistake a third time. Her first child was with a man who didn't marry her, by her post this first child wasn't planned either. Now she's pregnant for another man who doesn't see a future with her either. She should work on her self esteem, stop sleeping with men who don't want a future with her. Opening your legs for a man don't mean he loves you, don't mean he's going to wife you up. Lots of men are going to welcome free pucci if they can get it but that doesn't mean they want to marry the girl. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by zicoraads: 1:56pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
If only I had someone who is pregnant for me. I'll be so glad! Decide on what to do. You abort, know that you are officially a murderer. You keep, know that things might be hell...but not forever. Just trust in Him. Trust that God will pull you through. But whatever you decide to do, almost everyone here won't be there to support you. We can only advice. The cross is yours to hold. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 1:56pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
bennyrazz: Nobody is encouraging her to keep getting pregnant out of wedlock. Nobody! It actually goes without saying. And she has admitted that she made mistakes. It's just that she has already punished herself enough so no need to keep punishing her more. Nobody feels the consequences of her actions more than she does. I am simply of the opinion that constructive criticism (solution oriented) is way better than destructive criticism (putting somebody down who already is in a mess). She has a child to look after and is pregnant. Hurting her won't help anyone. That's all. 2 Likes |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 1:56pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
ephi123:Agreed! The fact that some "occasionally" turn out good doesn't negate the fact that most "often" become unruly Its never a good decision to abort a child but that "school of thought" should only be utilized primarily for "married couples" Having said that i "understand" your stand point, I'm simply just stating that in moments like this its always good to look at the "BIG PICTURE" |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:02pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Alondra:I see! So when a mother is unable to provide for the child, The innocent child should be brought into this world to suffer? Besides "religious believes" where is it written anywhere that "early abortion" is murder "SO MANY" Criminals, Rapist and sick murderers were born into dysfunctional homes (read about them) |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:04pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
23 Amazingly Breathtaking Photos Of Life Inside The Womb!!! www.nairaland.com/3540941/23-amazingly-breathtaking-photos-life#52316563 |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:05pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Incline: No, I am not comparing apples to oranges. The same principle applies here. Do you really believe that she has not been castigated for having the first child out of wedlock? I am sure she has. Did it help? Obviously not. I am sure she has not been careful enough with contraceptives - contrary to what she says because contraceptives are almost 100% if used properly - or maybe she has not been taught to apply them properly because I truly believe that a woman who does not want to become pregnant will not so we need to help her avoid such situations in the future rather than punish her for the sake of punishment or because we know no better. Telling people not to have se.x is like telling someone not to sh.it. The urge is too strong and it is natural. How many of you here preaching abstinence, actually practice what they preach? Abeg! She needs to find a solution now with that she can live and I am here to offer pragmatic solutions not some ideological nonsense based on misled emotions. Then we can talk about se.x education, which she urgently needs. 1 Like |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by bennyrazz: 2:06pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
EfemenaXY:I did not comprehend any part of her story at all. She took precautions in the first relationship and she got pregnant, she took in the second and still got pregnant. She should have raised her precautions a little higher by going for female surgical sterilization but she didn't. But let me ask you a simple question, if the op was your daughter, what will you do? |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:07pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Voice2: You oily piece of work! What do you think we are? 12? You say you put off creating a second Nairaland account - a thought which you claim to have harboured awhile, then all of a sudden you finally decided last night was the most auspicious hour to have the account created. Next time, ensure to paper over the cracks on the walls of your falsehood - even lizards dance within them. You, mister, are a craven. You didn't intend on creating any account, and only did so because you do not wish to quote me with your main account. I can hear all the red flags screaming foul play. In fact, I suspect you are that dude you quoted to appraise – the one you claimed you'd give a million likes. You can't guile me, especially not with this piss-poor performance bearing the hallmarks of a dilettante in the art of disguise and deception. You need lessons!
If there's nothing special about me, why then would you: I.) Shirk from quoting me with your main account. II.) Create a pseudo account in the dead of the night, then proceed to have me quoted with it in record speed. Food for thought, innit?
The toxic drivel you upchuck competes with the foul stench of fecal matter wafting out of your hindquarters.
You say I'm not special, and yet you say you know me. How can you know someone you don't consider worth a thimbleful of your time? Ah! And so the plot thickens...
I never claimed I was perfect, and I never impugned the OP for her lack of perfection. Your dyslexia, acute paranoia, inferiority and persecution complex, is causing you to see skull and crossbones in what really is just a lanner falcon.
I've had a bellyful of your idiocy, and I fear this is where the sun sets on our conversation. Refrain from further darkening my doorsteps with your coward shadows. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by EfemenaXY: 2:08pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
bennyrazz: The narrative isn't being changed. You're uncomfortable with being forced to see your ideology isn't realistic. She got pregnant the first-time. Oh okay, its fine. What was fine about it? it was a mistake but the second wasn't a mistake. she knows exactly what she is doing. How so? She got pregnant deliberately? Is that what you read? Despite everything she got going for her? Why would you say she did it deliberately when she's been as clear as day about not wanting to tell the father so he doesn't assume she's trying to rope him into marriage?? Sorry I don't get what you're driving at here. If she did it deliberately, then she's got something to gain. So please, do tell us what she'll be gaining here as you seem to know so much about her. The op had very easy labor and she had it easy when raising that one kid all by herself. So why not the second and why not the third? What do you know about pregnancy and child rearing?? Have you ever been pregnant to assume labour was easy? Have you got any kids of your own?? so many posters are encouraging her to keep on getting pregnant and raising children with no father figure, so @op, keep having sex, keep raising babies. it's the life you choose to live Pls furnish us with the quotations of these many posters "encouraging her to keep getting pregnant and raising kids without a father figure" And it's not your place to dictate whether or not she should have sex. How is that any concern of yours?? 3 Likes |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:09pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Mindfulness:Agreed! There is something called "planned parenthood" read about it, Having a child is a commitment to a cause Social and Moral developments "require" both parents The fact that "few" escape unscarred doesn't undermine the importance of "doing things the right way" |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by EfemenaXY: 2:18pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Mindfulness: Lol!! Sounds like someone had fun. Same thing here (run up to Christmas) but visited family on Boxing Day - so no cooking on that day. I must say the hols are whizzing past though. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by bennyrazz: 2:18pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Mindfulness:it seems you don't know people like op, after they have passed through the mess phase, they simply don't give a damn again. My own criticism as been very constructive. We beat a child with the right hand and draw the child back closer with the left hand. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:20pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
bbmpin: Planned parenthood is a beautiful thing. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by baby124: 2:20pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
So many judgmental people here. I never have time for essays and dissecting words as I am really busy in real life. But even if OP keeps making the same mistakes in future, it is not your place to judge her. After all she didn't come here asking for money, only guidance. If she begged for money then by all means have a go. But this is a responsible young lady we are talking about here. 3 Likes |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by EfemenaXY: 2:21pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
bennyrazz: Then go back and read her story again. Slowly this time. Re: your question, don't get personal with me. Having said that, I certainly won't dish out your toxic advice to an enemy let alone family. I'm not that insensitive. 1 Like |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:21pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
EfemenaXY: I had a lot of fun. It is good to have your loved ones around. Am I the only person who misses work a little? I think it is weird but I do somehow in the first days of my holidays and at the end I do not want to return again. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:24pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
bennyrazz: Then your insults won't help either but if it makes you feel better, so be it. My own criticism as been very constructive. What is constructive about it? We beat a child with the right hand and draw the child back closer with the left hand. Same ol' story! On and on and on ... Just because you keep repeating what you have been fed, doesn't make it any better. 1 Like |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by EfemenaXY: 2:24pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
baby124: Thank you! Those judging her don't see the positive steps she's taken to turn her life around. All they see is sex. The mere mention of the word gets them all heated up. Abegi. 3 Likes |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by bennyrazz: 2:27pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
EfemenaXY:there is really no need going back and forth with you on this issue. Your position has been stated clearly for everyone to see so there is really no need replying your queries. Have a wonderful day |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Voice2: 2:30pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
DarkRebel101: No be small thing, so all this literature-in-English grammar is on me? I cant even torture myself reading it all - remember i am not intelligent. Anyway, whether u believe me or not, you will be seeing a lot more of this moniker, it isn't a "one night stand". I am new in the family section, I don't know you from Adam, I don't know anybody yet please, so take your over bloated ego elsewhere. And I am not a man, please, thank you. Life is waiting to teach you some sense, carry on. 2 Likes |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by EfemenaXY: 2:30pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Mindfulness: Lol!! I had a little peek at my work phone (email) and wish I didn't. Fancy your boss and boss's boss awaiting your return Now I know what's being thrown my direction (and more). Argghh! Not complaining though, ''tis good to add value to the team. 1 Like |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by baby124: 2:30pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
troubledheart:Ok this is a very vague response. You also told him what you want to do before giving him a chance to decide. I understand you are young but my dear were you thinking he will say no keep it? Well get the scan and update us. It seems like getting rid of the pregnancy has already been decided. I adviced about making fast decisions and trying to force a fast decision on him. Do what is best for you. The final decision is yours to make. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by bennyrazz: 2:34pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Mindfulness:you can keep encouraging her actions under the guise of constructive criticisms, I don't buy that. I have told her what I think, you have told her what you think. We don't have to cruise our Lambor on the same lane. We can cruise at opposite lanes which is quite fine. We beat her, you hug her. That's the balance 2 Likes |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by EfemenaXY: 2:35pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
bennyrazz: Ditto. 1 Like |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:41pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Mindfulness: The foolish solution you're offering is for her to abort. I'm not against your choice or her choice to be having pre-marital sex but if she gets pregnant a third time, you're going to tell her to abort again. For how long is going to be aborting? My solution's for her to work on her selfesteem and lay off the sex, at least till she meets someone ready to walk her down the isle with her. Comparing se.x with shi--tting is sTTUPPID. Shi--tting's a necessity, something we need to be doing, plus its lack can cause death. Se.x isn't a necessity. It's not a necessity in a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship and its lack causes no death as in no one dies from abstaining. She's not a virgin anymore, I get, but she can still become celibate and wait for the right man, someone who's going to marry her instead of continuing to give her body to men who only want to hit and run. If you keep making the same mistake maybe it's time to do something different!! A buddy of mine got a chick pregnant 3 years ago, this was a chop and clean mouth situation. He didn't love her one bit but chick was too blinded too see it, he went to her anytime he wanted sex. He sees the kid and plays his duty as his father now but wants nothing to do with the chick. In fact, he has a fiancee now he's planning to marry next year. You ladies should be wiser. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by 5minsmadness: 2:42pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Mindfulness:Ah, reallllly? Thank goodness say no be me talk am ohhhhh |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by Nobody: 2:57pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Voice2: At least you've tacitly confirmed your acute dyslexia. That's got to count for something.
You are a cretinous fücktard with the brainpower of an abortus. You are Satan's gift to mankind - a constant reminder that Hell is real. You are a boil on humanity's äss, a moonstruck analphabetic lunkhead, and if human stupidity were electricity, you house enough voltage to send Michael Faraday into an everlasting comatose. In the days of Vlad III, retro-cranially inverted pillocks like you would have turbans nailed to your foreheads and your corpse fed to a conglomerate of pagan vultures. The next time you try bandying words unnecessarily with me only to play victim afterwards, you would be impaled upon a bed of hypodermic needles while a blind nurse attends to your wounds, the last thing you'd see before you die would be the ghastly image of a tree trunk piercing your ill-used heart. God's trousers! Here I was minding my own business and this sap-skulled dunce invaded my space, yammering some incoherent nonsense. Scurry away, will you? Before I pick your liver with Longinus' Spear Of Destiny. |
Re: Pregnant And Depressed. by baby124: 2:59pm On Dec 29, 2016 |
Incline:You think your buddy is a sane person by deceiving and hurting another person? Later when calamities start happening you people will open your mouth and start blaming witches. Should it be a crime that a woman loves and trusts that buddy to share her body with him. So she's not sharp because she's being herself with him. Rather she should pretend to be what she's not and play games to get married. Don't you see how crazy it is to marry someone who has to play games to get married. No wonder marriages are like 10 for one kobo these days. What you see in the marriage will not be what you saw during courtship because you are more obsessed with lies and pretence. So dumb 2 Likes |
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