₦airaland Forum

Konami94:
The legendary HARDDON! I need your help. I play musical instruments, and girls jokingly ask me to come and teach them. I need examples of witty responses I can give them, in order to keep them interested and keep the conversation flowing?

realpoacher:
The Pro has said it all!!

HARDDON:
Derailed much , we have
Roll now , we must

ambs50:
@ HardDon and other love doctors in the house, pls help.
Now my story is this, there is dis lady in my church I dnt know wat is popping between us.
For some months now, if am not around in church, she is d first person I hear looks out for me. Also, my words really make her laugh. Although I know I can be quite humorous. There are times our eyes meet just like that.

Recently, I noticed she always calls on me to either put in a word for her or support her wen we are gisting perhaps after d service because we only see often in church. We dnt live in d same area.
In essence, I am just noticing some unusual chemistry btw us. Even those (youths) around us are always match-making just suddenly.

So pls, is there anything btw us or it just my fantasies? Is it that I am d one reading meanings to things that are normal? And pls, d match-making stuff, is it also just their fantasies cos I knw I do it back then in school? Pls wat do I do?

NB: I don't come from a boxed up background.
I am just a normal guy. Not that active in church. (gave these backgrounds to make known reason am the more confused)

Awaitng many responses.
Thanks

magikalz:
I am not understanding....you are asking as if we are feeling this thing with you. How can we tell? Since obviously you can't see what is in your very before. How can we know what your fantasies are??

Okay...bro, the signs are there even as you have failed to see them. Now make your move.

HARDDON:
This is no Game. It is a way of life of the superior man. Every game eventually comes to an end n bliv u me, when u get tired n decide to hang your boots, that is when d law of retribution sets in n tiny lil ones soft bones start punching you on ur old lane! Then u get irritated, locate n don ur playing boots again N da circle continues.

That said,
We aint made of silicon like Siri: So Yes , we do fall in luv. We flow lines n rhymes even sing to her sometimes, We cud make her brkfast in bed, take her to d bathroom give her her warm bath, help shave her down below( yea, we like it totally clean... winks), take her out to exotic places within our pockets, we spend some quality time with her( chats, calls, physical etc).
The diffrence btw us n average guys in these terrain is that : we dont let emotions/Jrod to dictate our lives. We never get clingy n needy. Infact, we never give them complete seat. The more we luv her, the less seat space we give her. Keep her in check n on her toes.
We cud be rolling on hay one moment, the next we act like she doenst even exist. We create calculated situation that generate heated arguments sometimes just because we miss make up fvck ( oops!) n to push her ova d brim to talk. Silent , peaceful r/ship aint kul. You wud neva get to know each other n bond beyond s3x.

We know where n when to draw d lines. We take up our balls n direct d relationship gallantly. She does anything we dont like, we call her our soundly wit no delay.
We know the different btw singing luv n actually showing luv in the lil daily acts, things that makes her sware her life to us.
We never let fun jab out of our lives. We always sprinkle us.
Average guys get to a point, after labelling d r/ship, they go monitoring her every move, gettinG stuffy n not giving her breathing space. Getting too serious n losing d fun touch. Trying to instil d fear thingy in her heart. Doesnt work.

We know how to punish in different ways( using d d1ck, attention starvation, ignoring, raising our voice in calculated deep decibels, walking out on her, dropping d call on her, not eating her fud, denying her s3x etc.... )
these are not for d feint hearts lover boys


We do things cos we wano, not cos we r shrewdly cajoled to.

In summary, we know how to bring d rain when necessary n how to balance it off with sun shyne smile.

Dare to try! We are no mere men!

DavidTheGeek:
Can one utilize the information from Zodiac signs when meeting a lady?

I'm not a believer of Zodiac Signs. In fact, this year was my first time of looking up Zodiac Signs. I see people post it around and i just be like all this things are "oyinbo" shii.

But February this year, i got tired of seeing it and decided to check mine. Lo and behold almost everything they said about the character of "my sign" was true. It was like they knew almost everything about me! I mean they even went as far as stating "he might have trouble letting go of relationships that are outdated, holding on to shreds of emotion instead of searching for a new partner" Like damn i still secretly want the first girl i told "i love you" even tho she's not the kind of girl i want based on her attitude and character.

I looked up a few friends and based on the things i knew about them, the Zodiac stuff was right! I asked my then girlfriend (ex now) she told me almost everything too was true about her.

Now there's this girl i'm getting to know. We've been talking for some weeks now and "i've got her hooked" - she likes me and i like her too. But she keeps acting like James Bond, she still wants me to tell her clearly i like her.
It's more like she needs to hear it before she starts expressing her feelings.

I looked up her Zodiac sign and they said girls of that sign if they like you, they want you to reciprocate.

Telling her i like her isn't an issue. I can easily say it in a funny way.

The issue here is, i want to test this Zodiac signs stuff. I want to experiment.

Harddon what's your take on Zodiac Signs? Can the information be used?

realpoacher, magikalz what's your take on this Zodiac stuff?

Guys, any and everyone please share your thoughts on this.

N.B: "I like you" is "i like you" NOT "i love you".

DavidTheGeek:
Can one utilize the information from Zodiac signs when meeting a lady?

I'm not a believer of Zodiac Signs. In fact, this year was my first time of looking up Zodiac Signs. I see people post it around and i just be like all this things are "oyinbo" shii.

But February this year, i got tired of seeing it and decided to check mine. Lo and behold almost everything they said about the character of "my sign" was true. It was like they knew almost everything about me! I mean they even went as far as stating "he might have trouble letting go of relationships that are outdated, holding on to shreds of emotion instead of searching for a new partner" Like damn i still secretly want the first girl i told "i love you" even tho she's not the kind of girl i want based on her attitude and character.

I looked up a few friends and based on the things i knew about them, the Zodiac stuff was right! I asked my then girlfriend (ex now) she told me almost everything too was true about her.

Now there's this girl i'm getting to know. We've been talking for some weeks now and "i've got her hooked" - she likes me and i like her too. But she keeps acting like James Bond, she still wants me to tell her clearly i like her.
It's more like she needs to hear it before she starts expressing her feelings.

I looked up her Zodiac sign and they said girls of that sign if they like you, they want you to reciprocate.

Telling her i like her isn't an issue. I can easily say it in a funny way.

The issue here is, i want to test this Zodiac signs stuff. I want to experiment.

Harddon what's your take on Zodiac Signs? Can the information be used?

realpoacher, magikalz what's your take on this Zodiac stuff?

Guys, any and everyone please share your thoughts on this.

N.B: "I like you" is "i like you" NOT "i love you".

realpoacher:
Do you guys really believe in this zodiac mumbo jumbo?... To me it's all guess work

magikalz:
I doubted that stuff too just like you said.........till the day i managed to check it too. I'm a Saggitarian and shockingly enough, I exhibit 90-95% of their character. What really got me somewhat anxious was when I checked the signs of some exes, their characters and even some physical attributes fit exactly what their Zodiac signs described.

That shit is true where characters and attributes are concerned to a large extent but I still don't wanna believe they are absolute.

Like there are Zodiac pairings that fit best and some that don't.....according to astrology. Most of the gals I had good stuffs with were either April or June born...but hey, what do I know?

I think I will look it up again.

realpoacher:
Do you guys really believe in this zodiac mumbo jumbo?... To me it's all guess work

johnpaulbuddy:
great afternoon to every1 here...op I wanted to discuss something with yu...dere is dis very pretty gal at my place of work,although I dnt lyk dating some1 at my place of work but dis gal case is different...nw I want yu to help me with strategy with how I can go abt it,i want to date her but we don't talk much,its just greetings and we pass by

I won't advice you to do it.

The end result if things go sour between you two outweighs the pleasure.

BUT

if you insist.......

Look for a way to strike a conversation with her. It could be when you guys close from work and "accidentally" the opportunity arises to escort each other out of the office. (I used quote to mean you can create this "accidental situation" )

The conversation should be witty and somewhat brief. Your goal is to give her the impression that "there's something interesting about this co-worker".

The next day you see her, maintain the usual normal greeting.

Now let this accidental meetings happen once in a while (depending on how fast/slow you want to move things) and let the conversation be witty and hinting that you might like her.
Let her enjoy those brief moments with you.

Still maintain the usual normal greeting, this will keep her wondering "what's up with this guy".

Once things are flowing well when you guys have this accidental meetings, ask her for her number (preferably Whatsapp number).

You can then complete everything on chat - Deep meaningful late night conversations, naughty chats (don't worry about getting into trouble, girls love naughty talks), be playful, take jabs at her... etc.

Send her sms too while at work. I mean funny sms based on what's happening at work... Something like how she dressed like a queen to work just to seduce you.

The idea is to create a secret, fun and naughty work environment.

You can then proceed with getting physical and the rest.

DavidTheGeek:
The stuff really shocked me the day i checked.

I'm LEO

On that Zodiac pairings, The ex i talked about in the post is Pisces. According to astrology we're not compactable. Funny thing is we experienced some of the issue they stated for Leo and Pisces in a relationship.

I'm sceptic but since the signs are often correct , i think one could use the info when trying to get a lady.

I'm going to test it out, even if it means pulling some nice guy moves.

DavidTheGeek:


That must be one hell of a guess work bro!

I'm not a believer but there seem to be some truth in it.

Check yours out then tell us if they are wrong.

realpoacher:
Oya na, tell me about me. I was born on January 25th.... What's my zodiac and its characteristics?

realpoacher:
@daviddageek and @magikalz have done justice to your issue so I am only going to re-echo what they have said. And I will do this in practical terms.


Never fall in love with a woman, I repeat never fall in love with a woman. OK wait, let me rephrase myself... You can fall in love with a woman, it is allowed BUT NEVER SHOW/SAY IT. If you are wise, you will understand what I am trying to say.
Remember this statement: The day a man falls in love, a new MUMU is born.

I am not trying to make you wicked, NO! I am only trying to make you keep your BALLS by all means necessary. And to do that you have to understand the chemistry, psychology of a woman. A man in love does not appeal to the woman.. EOD!! Why because the woman is built for love/feelings while the man is built for things much more stronger than love, things like Companionship, Security, and Provider of comfort.

Everything you desire from a girlfriend( company, romance, respect, Sex and friendship) is what you are currently enjoying from her. What else do you stand to benefit from her by officially asking her out?... Nothing other than Emotions!... Yes! Emotions will sneak in once you open your mouth like tap telling her your feelings about her. After that, she will be gone with the wind.

I have to praise you for coordinating the relationship very well uptill this point because this type of paroles is what every guy dream of... Why?... 'cos she has more to lose while you have less to lose. She has invested more into the relationship and the last time I checked, girls with more investment in relationships always protect their investments.

Her withdrawal from you is because she wants to turn the table on you by making you chase her. Make no mistake about it, chasing her does not mean that she will accept or that she will come back (that's what your mind will tell you) rather chasing her will increase your investment upto even hers or even to supercede hers, once it gets to that point, Bros you will be booted out, trust me!

Since the both of you are still very young which I guess it's the same for most guys coming here seeking for help on relationships matters, I will take my time to school you guys in details on how to survive relationship issues with Nigerian girls. Notice my emphasis on "Nigerian girls" because Nigerian girls are a special breed and what works with other girls outside Nigeria might not work with Nigerian girls..... So back to your story.


A typical Nigerian girl does not understand what love is so in the process, abuse of it is inevitable. Once in love as a guy they term you nice guy without game. Make no mistake about being called a Mr nice guy because it's not a compliment rather to them its another way of knowing the guys who are wussies and pussies who will do or carry out all their whims and caprices!... Lolz.. Now I know you obviously wouldn't like to be termed that. Well, is there anything wrong with being a nice guy and actually fulfilling all the fantasies and desires of the girl you like/love?..... Erm, nothing wrong with that actually in the real sense but you should only do things on your own terms.

Girls are built to follow while guys are built to lead, deny it as much as you want, it still doesn't change the reality on ground. Leaders are the boss while followers are the staffs. How does it feel like, that as a staff, all of a sudden you start leading the company, office or parastatal and all of a sudden your boss becomes a member of your staff?... Wouldn't you be turned off with him?.. Its the same with allowing girls to lead a relationship while you follow, they immediately resent you because you are supposed to be the one leading them not them leading you. If they resent you how can they love, respect and be loyal to you like it was in the past?... Never it can't work. This is what @HARDDON have been trying to pass across with this thread.

FYI, a girl emotionally blackmailing you is leading you, fulfilling her every desire is; she leading you, putting all her advice to work is; she leading you, making you to fall in love with her is; she leading you. Providing for cash for your upkeep; is she leading you(husbands beware!).

There is only one way to fulfilling her desires and still remain at the top, that is everything you must do or not do should be on YOUR OWN TERMS.

In conclusion, in withdrawing from you, she wants to use reverse psychology on you to spill the beans. She wants you to show her that you love her "on her own terms". Fall for it and lose her forever. Even if she doesn't run away, get ready because it means that she will always emotionally blackmail you to get what she wants even if you guys get married.

Tame your emotions man and refuse to tell her your feelings. Grow some balls bro! By withholding Sex from you she has declared war on not just you but on all male specie, she isn't the first to go down this lane, her other sisters eve, Delilah, cleopatra before now have towed this same path. Don't worry sir, you have the davids, Solomons, mysterys and the styles here to assist you . Ignore her, Go out and catch fun with other girls, drop your jealousy or better still just face your medical books. Your nuts sac is full and your sense of judgment might be blurred. Go fucck some other girls, runs girls, oloshos, I don't care so long as you spill your nuts. Anything other than telling her that you love her is fine by me. But if you dare tell her that you love her, you will not only lose her, you will beg for her love, you will cry and crawl on your knees for her love. I am warning you.

The only iota of respite you will have is if you must say anything, only talk about the future like @magikalz said like you should ask her how many kids she will want to have for you. Bla bla bla.. Just keep questioning her about your future together. Never be definite in your talk, answers and promises with her.. That way, you won't grant her the psychological approval about your relationship that she wants making her to continually keep searching for it thereby will always keep doing things to please you.

Remember this, so long as she keeps searching for your approval about her stand in the relationship, everything will be fine. The day you grant her the approval, she is gone.


So in all these,am I saying that you shouldn't show care, concern, love, affections, feelings at all?..... No!.... I follow and observe the 70/30 quota rule.

Me: Relationship
I don't care attitude 70%
Care and romance 30%.


Me: when I finally marry

I don't care attitude 50%... I can't kill myself with HBP abeg
Care and romance 50%.


Even when showing care, concern and affection, make sure you do it on your own terms.

Do this and see the results.

Thank me later

DavidTheGeek:


Your zodiac sign is Aquarius.

Strengths: Progressive, original, independent, humanitarian
Weaknesses: Runs from emotional expression, temperamental, uncompromising, aloof
Aquarius likes: Fun with friends, helping others, fighting for causes, intellectual conversation, a good listener
Aquarius dislikes: Limitations, broken promises, being lonely, dull or boring situations, people who disagree with them

Aquarius-born are shy and quiet , but on the other hand they can be eccentric and energetic. However, in both cases, they are deep thinkers and highly intellectual people who love helping others. They are able to see without prejudice, on both sides, which makes them people who can easily solve problems.

When this man falls in love, he will not exactly know how to show it. On one hand, he will want to show exactly how exciting and incredible he is, but on the other, he will have trouble communicating how he feels.

He can have sex anywhere, anytime and he needs a partner who can follow. His sexual appetite is big, but he can strangely go without sex for months. Behind this behavior that many might find confusing, hides the strength of his convictions and the entire belief system that most people don’t even connect to sexual experiences. If he believes for some reason it is best to be alone for a while, anyone around him might claim he is insane because the perfect woman is standing in front of him, and he would still stay alone, firmly believing that this woman will wait if she is truly perfect. However, in most cases, he will want to have sex often, and if he is not in a serious relationship, he will like to change partners and not exactly be shy about expressing his sexuality.

I just pulled off a few stuff you can read more @=> http://www.astrology-zodiac-signs.com/man/aquarius/

Samalabz:
Bring it on Boss...

realpoacher:
@daviddageek and @magikalz have done justice to your issue so I am only going to re-echo what they have said. And I will do this in practical terms.


Never fall in love with a woman, I repeat never fall in love with a woman. OK wait, let me rephrase myself... You can fall in love with a woman, it is allowed BUT NEVER SHOW/SAY IT. If you are wise, you will understand what I am trying to say.
Remember this statement: The day a man falls in love, a new MUMU is born.

I am not trying to make you wicked, NO! I am only trying to make you keep your BALLS by all means necessary. And to do that you have to understand the chemistry, psychology of a woman. A man in love does not appeal to the woman.. EOD!! Why because the woman is built for love/feelings while the man is built for things much more stronger than love, things like Companionship, Security, and Provider of comfort.

Everything you desire from a girlfriend( company, romance, respect, Sex and friendship) is what you are currently enjoying from her. What else do you stand to benefit from her by officially asking her out?... Nothing other than Emotions!... Yes! Emotions will sneak in once you open your mouth like tap telling her your feelings about her. After that, she will be gone with the wind.

I have to praise you for coordinating the relationship very well uptill this point because this type of paroles is what every guy dream of... Why?... 'cos she has more to lose while you have less to lose. She has invested more into the relationship and the last time I checked, girls with more investment in relationships always protect their investments.

Her withdrawal from you is because she wants to turn the table on you by making you chase her. Make no mistake about it, chasing her does not mean that she will accept or that she will come back (that's what your mind will tell you) rather chasing her will increase your investment upto even hers or even to supercede hers, once it gets to that point, Bros you will be booted out, trust me!

Since the both of you are still very young which I guess it's the same for most guys coming here seeking for help on relationships matters, I will take my time to school you guys in details on how to survive relationship issues with Nigerian girls. Notice my emphasis on "Nigerian girls" because Nigerian girls are a special breed and what works with other girls outside Nigeria might not work with Nigerian girls..... So back to your story.


A typical Nigerian girl does not understand what love is so in the process, abuse of it is inevitable. Once in love as a guy they term you nice guy without game. Make no mistake about being called a Mr nice guy because it's not a compliment rather to them its another way of knowing the guys who are wussies and pussies who will do or carry out all their whims and caprices!... Lolz.. Now I know you obviously wouldn't like to be termed that. Well, is there anything wrong with being a nice guy and actually fulfilling all the fantasies and desires of the girl you like/love?..... Erm, nothing wrong with that actually in the real sense but you should only do things on your own terms.

Girls are built to follow while guys are built to lead, deny it as much as you want, it still doesn't change the reality on ground. Leaders are the boss while followers are the staffs. How does it feel like, that as a staff, all of a sudden you start leading the company, office or parastatal and all of a sudden your boss becomes a member of your staff?... Wouldn't you be turned off with him?.. Its the same with allowing girls to lead a relationship while you follow, they immediately resent you because you are supposed to be the one leading them not them leading you. If they resent you how can they love, respect and be loyal to you like it was in the past?... Never it can't work. This is what @HARDDON have been trying to pass across with this thread.

FYI, a girl emotionally blackmailing you is leading you, fulfilling her every desire is; she leading you, putting all her advice to work is; she leading you, making you to fall in love with her is; she leading you. Providing for cash for your upkeep; is she leading you(husbands beware!).

There is only one way to fulfilling her desires and still remain at the top, that is everything you must do or not do should be on YOUR OWN TERMS.

In conclusion, in withdrawing from you, she wants to use reverse psychology on you to spill the beans. She wants you to show her that you love her "on her own terms". Fall for it and lose her forever. Even if she doesn't run away, get ready because it means that she will always emotionally blackmail you to get what she wants even if you guys get married.

Tame your emotions man and refuse to tell her your feelings. Grow some balls bro! By withholding Sex from you she has declared war on not just you but on all male specie, she isn't the first to go down this lane, her other sisters eve, Delilah, cleopatra before now have towed this same path. Don't worry sir, you have the davids, Solomons, mysterys and the styles here to assist you . Ignore her, Go out and catch fun with other girls, drop your jealousy or better still just face your medical books. Your nuts sac is full and your sense of judgment might be blurred. Go fucck some other girls, runs girls, oloshos, I don't care so long as you spill your nuts. Anything other than telling her that you love her is fine by me. But if you dare tell her that you love her, you will not only lose her, you will beg for her love, you will cry and crawl on your knees for her love. I am warning you.

The only iota of respite you will have is if you must say anything, only talk about the future like @magikalz said like you should ask her how many kids she will want to have for you. Bla bla bla.. Just keep questioning her about your future together. Never be definite in your talk, answers and promises with her.. That way, you won't grant her the psychological approval about your relationship that she wants making her to continually keep searching for it thereby will always keep doing things to please you.

Remember this, so long as she keeps searching for your approval about her stand in the relationship, everything will be fine. The day you grant her the approval, she is gone.


So in all these,am I saying that you shouldn't show care, concern, love, affections, feelings at all?..... No!.... I follow and observe the 70/30 quota rule.

Me: Relationship
I don't care attitude 70%
Care and romance 30%.


Me: when I finally marry

I don't care attitude 50%... I can't kill myself with HBP abeg
Care and romance 50%.


Even when showing care, concern and affection, make sure you do it on your own terms.

Do this and see the results.

Thank me later

fayded:
boss,thanks a lot.I just saw d write up now.
however,she finally gave in yesterday sha,and we did it.and I haven't told her bout my feelings and not planning to either,but I've been using that future statements ish about marriage,and she has been responding well..thanks boss

ambs50:
@ HardDon and other love doctors in the house, pls help.
Now my story is this, there is dis lady in my church I dnt know wat is popping between us.
For some months now, if am not around in church, she is d first person I hear looks out for me. Also, my words really make her laugh. Although I know I can be quite humorous. There are times our eyes meet just like that.

Recently, I noticed she always calls on me to either put in a word for her or support her wen we are gisting perhaps after d service because we only see often in church. We dnt live in d same area.
In essence, I am just noticing some unusual chemistry btw us. Even those (youths) around us are always match-making just suddenly.

So pls, is there anything btw us or it just my fantasies? Is it that I am d one reading meanings to things that are normal? And pls, d match-making stuff, is it also just their fantasies cos I knw I do it back then in school? Pls wat do I do?

NB: I don't come from a boxed up background.
I am just a normal guy. Not that active in church. (gave these backgrounds to make known reason am the more confused)

Awaitng many responses.
Thanks

ambs50:
@ HardDon and other love doctors in the house, pls help.
Now my story is this, there is dis lady in my church I dnt know wat is popping between us.
For some months now, if am not around in church, she is d first person I hear looks out for me. Also, my words really make her laugh. Although I know I can be quite humorous. There are times our eyes meet just like that.

Recently, I noticed she always calls on me to either put in a word for her or support her wen we are gisting perhaps after d service because we only see often in church. We dnt live in d same area.
In essence, I am just noticing some unusual chemistry btw us. Even those (youths) around us are always match-making just suddenly.

So pls, is there anything btw us or it just my fantasies? Is it that I am d one reading meanings to things that are normal? And pls, d match-making stuff, is it also just their fantasies cos I knw I do it back then in school? Pls wat do I do?

NB: I don't come from a boxed up background.
I am just a normal guy. Not that active in church. (gave these backgrounds to make known reason am the more confused)

Awaitng many responses.
Thanks

realpoacher:
Wow! This is interesting. This is 80% me and 20% not me. If this be an exam score they will get an A. If this be guess work then they are assured as hell to get 100% if they become serious.

I have a fuccking large appetite for Sex, damn, most times its insatiable but seeing a partner to keep up is a big problem.

When in love, I find it very difficult to express it. Infact I am completely clueless as to how to buy gift for my lover. I just get confused whether to buy a dress or a jewelry. Whether doing something big for her or something small. Always wondering what will be befitting for her situation until I get lost and ditch the idea of expression or buying something completely. Honestly it's irritating

Growing up I was shy but spontaneously energetic and eccentric. Today I am a deep thinker and a good listener. Very objective in reasoning and I always seek for diverse views on critical issues. And did I say that solving problems is my specialty?... ...

Erm... Erm... *I don't run away from emotional expression sha*.. Infact I crave for it

Japhet04:
pls this is my exactly situation, only that in mine she has already asked what do I want from her? I really dont know how to reply this... Pls help Davidthegeek, magikalz