₦airaland Forum

teresafaith:
You are a wicked, selfish, and a self centered person.

Sit there and be looking for pity party

Wicked man

you harsh ooo.... You sure say no be you be op wife?

czarina:
you harsh ooo.... You sure say no be you be op wife?

teresafaith:
You are a wicked, selfish, and a self centered person.

Sit there and be looking for pity party

Wicked man

My sister, I tire for the man o. How can a grown man be making serious plans, leaving his family in the dark?. Op, are u really married to this woman or u were just co-habiting? If u are, pls act like a man-go to ur wife and talk things out,don't leave till u sort ur differences out-she has a right to know where she stands in ur life. Pls, stop being childish

czarina:
you harsh ooo.... You sure say no be you be op wife?

leave her alone she's my wife's friend i know she's among those misleading her. Her name is Teresa

Avsegzy:
leave her alone she's my wife's friend i know she's among those misleading her. Her name is Teresa

lol...so all of una dey nairaland and una tell each other una usernames, Bad Idea! ....just sort issues with ur wife pls..

You are a wicked, selfish, and a self centered person.
Sit there and be looking for pity party
Wicked man


Why na, Wetin be ya own

This institution called marriage! May God help us.



Op I'll only say one thing, you need to man up and handle that woman you call a wife.

What nonsense did I just read.

I think I can understand the reason for this dudes action....I can't really judge sha...I don't know ur wife or if all these allegations are legit...but if wat u typed above is true...den dude leave the woman na...its clear she doesn't even love u so y are u forcing urself....u guys don't even stay together. So u are not even in marriage... U are just married

She is never the right woman for you....just take good care of your child. But as for her is not a wife.

@OP, for how long will you be running from your wife and home ?

You have to decide if you still want the union to continue,
you can't abandon your wife and at the same time expect her
to take you serious.

Mend fences or let her go.

Find what you like and let it kill you

I can't seem to figure out why she is behaving like this..... No love ,at all. if she does love you, she is far from showing it. maybe you guys should see a counselor. That one when she say you never see anything so, I just tire.
First try to talk to her.
Book an appointment with a counselor if possible.
Pray
Meet your family members and maybe Pastor too.

Avsegzy:
I agree i abandoned her physically but financially is a big NO and that can never be part of her problem now cos i sent money every month and some time twice in a month

the first problem a man would always have, is the ability to let go. When u cannot let go of that which you think you cannot do without, then, you are in bondage.

I understand the issue about your child, but believe me, the issue would resolve itself.

Let that evil lady go and you'll be surprised how easy you fogot her!

Avsegzy:
The most shocking things was that without informing her of what happened or my coming home she handed over a boxers " you're welcome this is what i bought for you" i asked how did she know i was coming she said she just feel like buying it. Later i told her what happened and how she was the cause but she wasn't remorseful rather she said i was lying against her and I've never seen anything this is just the beginning.

You are married to powers that is bigger than you bro.

Sounds like u r happy having her as a concubine dan a wife. cos u cant live with her under same roof and smile. well it is said dat marriage is a tribulation,na like dis ur own tribulation take come. But to be frank with u, not living with ur family (in fact intentionally running away) is like u r already on d path to crashing ur marriage. i suggest u speak with her and ask her abt d future. wats her plan for d child, hw does she want u both to secure d child' future? cos if she is just a spender, den u r in deep shit(sorry for d language).
You dont just need advice, u ve to seriously work on ur wife' attitude and objective in life. Warri say "Its not just by praying to GOD for help, u need to also make sure u secure ur goat make e for no lost".
Wish u d best in ur situation

Avsegzy:
I'll try to make this brief. I met her in 2005 got married in 2010 but everything i knew about her characters Changed after that... From nagging to making life very difficult for me to cope...

I tried to adjust and told myself "this is what it to be called a real man" then i was in the force mostly posted on night guard 6pm to 6am so when i got home i would try to relax when it's 7am my wife will tell me to leave the bed cos she wanted to rearrange the bed neatly so I'd stand but she wouldn't let me use the bed back claiming I'd rough it lol... After few minutes she'd tell me to get up from the chair in the sitting room that she wanted to sweep. Hehe i was like " i don enter one chance ohhh".

Sometimes if i got annoyed before i said one she'd already said four but one mistake i made was that i used to tell her that i can never ever beat my wife even for once. Sometimes she would even tell me that I was only scared of being beaten by a woman not that i didn't want to beat her, if I'm a man enough i should let us give it a trial lol.

I tried to do an inter state transfer just to be far away from cos after our first child things only get worse but then there was an embargo on transfer, i tried to be transferred to another local government but it wasn't successful. I took it as a shame on me to drive her out even with my little kid so i decided to travel out of the country after my visa came out i resigned but i felt guilty with the idea of leaving without informing her so I told her 2days to my departure though she was happy about it but insisted i must give her money to rent another house before i left, i pleaded with her to continue living there that later I'll send her money to rent another place but she said NO... I gave her the money, later to the market and buy foodstuffs that i knew could take them up to 2months at least, i also gave her what i could afford as "pocket money". It's not even up to 2weeks over i left that she started calling me that they were hungry and no money to buy food i was shocked "so i never escape?" I was annoyed "after you almost finished all my money back home?" hmmm "ok no problem use out of the money i gave u to rent another apartment" she said no she'd already given it to her friend to keep it.

She didn't even ask if got a job or not every time she called it'd be argument about money. I told her to go to my mum then to collect money but she refused saying my mum wasn't the one that came to marry her...

Later i stop to pick her calls and later changed my number but the more i tried to ignore her the more i missed her and my kid who i love to hear her voice always. I called her back after 2months, sent money to her(a big mistake) and that made her to demand more and more with hot pressure. I got tired of life didn't know what else to do and I've not been earning much work permit and co. Still under processing i decided to go do some casual works(labour work) the money i got 1st and 2nd day in the 3rd day luck ran against me and and i was arrested for working without permit i had the option to pay fine though but i couldn't afford the amount so i came back to Nigeria.

The most shocking things was that without informing her of what happened or my coming home she handed over a boxers " you're welcome this is what i bought for you" i asked how did she know i was coming she said she just feel like buying it. Later i told her what happened and how she was the cause but she wasn't remorseful rather she said i was lying against her and I've never seen anything this is just the beginning.

Backed in Nigeria no more work, things was hard but I'm not a lazy type but i refused to live with her but not willing to leave her. I decided to stay in another state, found something to do, got enough money years later and travelled out again but this time i didn't tell her anything up to a year now but i do send money. She sent a message through social media that she heard I'm living with a woman somewhere else so if i don't show up in 3months an end will come to our marriage.

I forgot to hard she works, has a shop. What should i do cos i can go home now and i love her and don't want to have 2nd wife in my record I've not even cheated just for once.

You sound like you are in a very dysfunctional relationship.

And based on the premise that your account is true and unblemished, breaking up may not actually be a bad thing.

I can't apply for Visa without my wife knowing let alone travel and not tell her or call her every day of atkeast every week. Most especially when a kid is involved.

Avsegzy:
I'll try to make this brief. I met her in 2005 got married in 2010 but everything i knew about her characters Changed after that... From nagging to making life very difficult for me to cope...

I tried to adjust and told myself "this is what it to be called a real man" then i was in the force mostly posted on night guard 6pm to 6am so when i got home i would try to relax when it's 7am my wife will tell me to leave the bed cos she wanted to rearrange the bed neatly so I'd stand but she wouldn't let me use the bed back claiming I'd rough it lol... After few minutes she'd tell me to get up from the chair in the sitting room that she wanted to sweep. Hehe i was like " i don enter one chance ohhh".

Sometimes if i got annoyed before i said one she'd already said four but one mistake i made was that i used to tell her that i can never ever beat my wife even for once. Sometimes she would even tell me that I was only scared of being beaten by a woman not that i didn't want to beat her, if I'm a man enough i should let us give it a trial lol.

I tried to do an inter state transfer just to be far away from cos after our first child things only get worse but then there was an embargo on transfer, i tried to be transferred to another local government but it wasn't successful. I took it as a shame on me to drive her out even with my little kid so i decided to travel out of the country after my visa came out i resigned but i felt guilty with the idea of leaving without informing her so I told her 2days to my departure though she was happy about it but insisted i must give her money to rent another house before i left, i pleaded with her to continue living there that later I'll send her money to rent another place but she said NO... I gave her the money, later to the market and buy foodstuffs that i knew could take them up to 2months at least, i also gave her what i could afford as "pocket money". It's not even up to 2weeks over i left that she started calling me that they were hungry and no money to buy food i was shocked "so i never escape?" I was annoyed "after you almost finished all my money back home?" hmmm "ok no problem use out of the money i gave u to rent another apartment" she said no she'd already given it to her friend to keep it.

She didn't even ask if got a job or not every time she called it'd be argument about money. I told her to go to my mum then to collect money but she refused saying my mum wasn't the one that came to marry her...

Later i stop to pick her calls and later changed my number but the more i tried to ignore her the more i missed her and my kid who i love to hear her voice always. I called her back after 2months, sent money to her(a big mistake) and that made her to demand more and more with hot pressure. I got tired of life didn't know what else to do and I've not been earning much work permit and co. Still under processing i decided to go do some casual works(labour work) the money i got 1st and 2nd day in the 3rd day luck ran against me and and i was arrested for working without permit i had the option to pay fine though but i couldn't afford the amount so i came back to Nigeria.

The most shocking things was that without informing her of what happened or my coming home she handed over a boxers " you're welcome this is what i bought for you" i asked how did she know i was coming she said she just feel like buying it. Later i told her what happened and how she was the cause but she wasn't remorseful rather she said i was lying against her and I've never seen anything this is just the beginning.

Backed in Nigeria no more work, things was hard but I'm not a lazy type but i refused to live with her but not willing to leave her. I decided to stay in another state, found something to do, got enough money years later and travelled out again but this time i didn't tell her anything up to a year now but i do send money. She sent a message through social media that she heard I'm living with a woman somewhere else so if i don't show up in 3months an end will come to our marriage.

I forgot to hard she works, has a shop. What should i do cos i can go home now and i love her and don't want to have 2nd wife in my record I've not even cheated just for once.

Why am i thinking you are not saying the whole truth? All you ve told us is what and what your wife has done. Are you saying you have no fault in all these?

u love her, yet u don't wanno stay in the same place with her, Op u are lustful come to your senses, u are also lost, be found. That's all I have got to tell ya.

teresafaith:
You are a wicked, selfish, and a self centered person.

Sit there and be looking for pity party

Wicked man

Seriously do you have issue with this guy?I mean personal beef how you call him names after all he narrated is beyond the ordinary.

teresafaith:
You are a wicked, selfish, and a self centered person.

Sit there and be looking for pity party

Wicked man

looking for cheap attention, you have gotten it oya run along

Yours don't sound like a married person's tale. Are you sure the two of you are married?

czarina:
lol...so all of una dey nairaland and una tell each other una usernames, Bad Idea! ....just sort issues with ur wife pls..

lol just joking...

Maximus85:
Why am i thinking you are not saying the whole truth? All you ve told us is what and what your wife has done. Are you saying you have no fault in all these?

Let's say he has a fault init,is that enough reason for the woman to make life unbearable for him ? In all thy getting get a God fearing wife not all these slay queens everywhere.

zicoraads:
Yours don't sound like a married person's tale. Are you sure the two of you are married?

YES

henryhemon:
Seriously do you have issue with this guy?I mean personal beef how you call him names after all he narrated is beyond the ordinary.

What are you saying? Does OP sound like a serious person?

Avsegzy:
lol just joking...

nice sense of humor.... I almost believed

If this story is really true, first of all do a DNA to find out if the child is really yours.
After that make plans to come and join you aboard. thirdly break up with her before she breaks you.

Avsegzy:
YES

Then man up and take control. Most of the people talking to you here won't solve your problem. You too are part of your problem.

zicoraads:
What are you saying? Does OP sound like a serious person?

Do you know him?

Your presence in their lives is much more than the money you send. Your daughter needs you! What do you expect your wife to do while you keep being unstable? Get your acts together! If you want to make it work you have a sit down with her, be real with her a 100, and if u dont allow her make plans for herself too.

Stop running away from your problems it wont make them go away