₦airaland Forum

Sometimes i dont know where to draw the line. Crazy comparison - but its like having a new born... you want to give them everything but you know it will be bad in the long run.... n after they are spoiled there is no turning back.

I love him to bits and pieces.... Ive been so torn between what is right(logic) and what my heart is telling me.

I know i havent been the sweetest angel and i do lash out at him when im mad buh i hold in too much.

But what ur saying is true... i always pray and hope he comes to his senses and we can move forward happily, coz after all his not all bad.

ayokellany:
Pure and simple a man that loves you won't take you down this lane. In another tot some of us believe additional care n understanding is part of "loving" maybe your bf just does not.

No man change with your kind of altitude give him space to reevaluate what brought you too together. If he still cherish that he would come back to you understanding you lack the mental strength for his drama. If he walks away, he was always going to walk someday so either way take the bull by the horn.

That is my biggest fear.

I dont even mind leaving South Africa to stay in Nigeria - with me hating the hot Nigerian weather and all

My fear is just ending up in a toxic marriage and having kids in that mess. It would ruin me.

Rokia2:
Poster you are lucky you are in a long distance relationship. Cut it off sharp sharps.

Imagine when you live under the same roof what will happen. Ha you better get out of that hell hole.

Wezma:
That is my biggest fear.

I dont even mind leaving South Africa to stay in Nigeria - with me hating the hot Nigerian weather and all

My fear is just ending up in a toxic marriage and having kids in that mess. It would ruin me.

Yep girl think it through. Many people are suffering in silence in miserable marriages.

Rokia2:
Yep girl think it through. Many people are suffering in silence in miserable marriages.

true. i hate marriage that is poblem. i have promise any woman i will marry the best home ever. i will provide for her

Keketu:
true. i hate marriage that is poblem. i have promise any woman i will marry the best home ever. i will provide for her

lol why you keep quoting me thou?

Rokia2:
lol why you keep quoting me thou?

becore you are beautiful and i wish to marry you

Keketu:
becore you are beautiful and i wish to marry you

Funny

Hi Guys...
I created a WhatsApp page for individuals who had at one time was in a Relationship with a Narcissist Individual, and who is seeking healing... I know it really hurt concerning the things a victims goes through in the hands of Narcissistic individual. Please, feel free to contact me on WhatsApp 08167114856. Let's grow a communities to share ideas on this prevalent issues.

Hi Guys...
I created a WhatsApp page for individuals who had at one time was in a Relationship with a Narcissist Individual, and who is seeking healing... I know it really hurt concerning the things a victims goes through in the hands of Narcissistic individual. Please, feel free to contact me on WhatsApp 08167114856. Let's grow a communities to share ideas on this prevalent issues.

Persons with Narcissistic Personality disorder

- Idealization
- Devaluation
- Discard

And the cycles repeat itself.

You can only Destroy a Narcissist when you go through an Empathic Supernova.


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.

eish.... I have not been here for a min!

So if you have been following my post yall would know that I met an Igbo man via this platform. I have been to Nigeria twice this year and all has been well.

However, we are dealing with some issues of narcissism. Initially i thought it was just an "Igbo" thing but as time went by i realized its actually more than that.

I now find myself in a relationship with a man who blames me for everything that goes wrong in the relationship!
He is very jealous
Sooooo Controlling
Doesn't like me discussing our relationship issues with my mother (but he finds it quite fine to call her to complain)
When i confide in him he uses it against me
He apologies for things and just repeats them the very next day!

I have not been innocent though all this, because before when he irritates me or hurts me i lash out!
And i have tried other methods of fixing issues, even begging him to calm down for the sake of the relationship when HE was the one who messed up!

I love him but im tired. I dont know what to do anymore.

How do i make him see what he is doing to hurt me!

Lets talk people, how do i deal with this matter.

Note, we are in a long distance relationship so frustration is x10 than that of a normal one.

And what will you do if you succeed in changing him

They say " when a woman succeeds in changing her man , he becomes undesirable "

The emotional rollercoaster he gives you is why you are attracted and addicted to him . The day he changes and starts pleasing you is the day you will stop loving him as you do now .

The thing is ....... If you love him with this character he exhibits towards you , don't you think that , if he stops, you will stop loving him ? . Yes, the opposite will happen. Then he will be the one to come to nairaland to cry that the girl he changed for ( pleasing ) has stopped loving him .

Look.... don't even try to change him because the day you succeed is the day what you feel for him will vanish into thin air and you will begin to look for another man that will make you feel the way he made you feel initially because that is what you are attracted to in a man else you wouldn't even love a man you claim to be a narcissist in the first place .







Are you confused and you want to have more idea ??
Ask me questions , I will reply you .

Here is the wrong place to get advice on relationship matters coz youwill end up making mistakes. Many here are going through alot on thier own end and remember they will used thier experience to be advising you which might not be same as them