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I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody: 10:32am On Nov 23, 2017
MissWrite:
Sometimes when a girl says she wants to see you upset, she's only looking for honesty. It's impossible for a human being to keep piling up another person's trash without eventually snapping under the pressure. Those who vent regularly, get mad and get done with it. But someone like you, the moment you eventually crack, it would be epic. Not in a good way. And that day, she would realize she done enter one chance. She wants to know what it would be like when you get mad, and if she can handle it.

But then again, she might just be looking for flaws to justify dumping you. You know her better than we do.
I agree 100% with this point
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Khonifer: 10:33am On Nov 23, 2017
Lol... This one is madness cheesy

My man is calm and gentle and respectful and I like him that way biko. Before somebody will comman be formin dominant nonsense on top my head
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by tosyne2much(m): 10:37am On Nov 23, 2017
Khonifer:
Lol... This one is madness cheesy

My man is calm and gentle and respectful and I like him that way biko. Before somebody will comman be formin dominant nonsense on top my head
But that doesn't change the fact that many ladies do not appreciate the kind of man God has blessed you with
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by vicben27(m): 10:40am On Nov 23, 2017
E be like say you never understand women! man women are complicated beings, a relationship where is all sweet without little quarrels once a while is no relationship because you both are not really getin to know the other side of each other. a woman wants a man who is in control, a man that can handle her emotionally, not a wicklin. I intensional look for trouble once in a while just to see how my boo will react that as helped us in understanding each other. Do yanga once in a while n let are pounder, wen sort it out don't let it exceed that very day! it will help you understand her better! above all there is no standard formats or formula wen it relationship. different stuf works for different folks
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by tosyne2much(m): 10:49am On Nov 23, 2017
vicben27:
E be like say you never understand women! man women are complicated beings, a relationship where is all sweet without let it exceed that very day! it will help you understand her better! above all there is no standard formats or formula wen it relationship. different stuf works for different folks
But what if you purposely initiate a quarrel but her reaction is what you never bargained for? cheesy
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by MrHenshaw: 11:01am On Nov 23, 2017
antysocial:
I was chatting with my gf yesterday and was really priding myself on how I was a perfect guy for any woman. I couldn't believe it when she said I has a flaw. She told me I'm too gentle and Calm. She said I have never we gotten angry with her before . I was like what's wrong with that and she said she doesn't like that . She said she doesn't like me talking nonsense from her even after apologizing and all that. She was like she would just like to see me angry with her , shout on her or smthing. She told me whenever there was an agreement between us and she apologises , she wasn't expecting me to forgive her so easily, at least she expected me to snub her and all that. I have been very confused since yesterday after those statements. I mean : what do girls really want.?
Your Moniker is working against you.
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by vicben27(m): 11:13am On Nov 23, 2017
tosyne2much:
But what if you purposely initiate a quarrel but her reaction is what you never bargained for? cheesy
a real man should naturally know how to calm his woman down with some level of psychological/emotional control. infact it should be both ways. the love you both shear should be proportional. if you show a woman you love her excessively, some of them interprets it as wickness, so there should be a form of balance. be sweet, be loving, but if you observe some characters you naturally can't condone call her attention to it, it should be the bases wic you will want to quarrel a little, that shows you know wat you want n that your also in charge. no matter how hard we try a good woman knows her man well enough n if she really loves you, both of you will definitely always work things out. NOTE: this little quarrels should not be always ooh or done excessively (which could make you appear as the nagging type), women are different if she the understanding n well behaved ,then it won't be necessary. it should only be done if you notice some adnormalises.
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Gofwane(m): 11:34am On Nov 23, 2017
Enough of all this bull crap. Women want a guy who will bla bla bla..... is it a one way thing? They will always complain that they want a guy that is so so so.... but if we complain that they are fat, they begin to take offence.

@op, tell your girlfriend that you don't like a girl that doesn't expect you to behave like the gentleman you truly are.
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody: 11:37am On Nov 23, 2017
tosyne2much:
But what if you purposely initiate a quarrel but her reaction is what you never bargained for? cheesy
It is natural for weedsto grow without any form ofwork done on the ground, but for crops, cultivation is needed, if we channel our strengths to cultivating our relationships rather than subjecting people to tests, it will flourish, character will be revealed and improved, Bottomline Tosin, weallshould work towards cultivating relationships and not engage in activities that may lead to strain, tension and unecessary hassles.
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody: 11:38am On Nov 23, 2017
Gofwane:
Enough of all this bull crap. Women want a guy who will bla bla bla..... is it a one way thing? They will always complain that they want a guy that is so so so.... but if we complain that they are fat, they begin to take offence.

@op, tell your girlfriend that you don't like a girl that doesn't expect you to behave like the gentleman you truly are.
Too much heat cheesy
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by tosyne2much(m): 11:39am On Nov 23, 2017
vicben27:
a real man should naturally know how to calm his woman down with some level of psychological/emotional control. infact it should be both ways. the love you both shear should be proportional. if you show a woman you , women are different if she the understanding n well behaved ,then it won't be necessary. it should only be done if you notice some adnormalises.
Nice one bro cool
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by antysocial(op): 11:41am On Nov 23, 2017
I just concluded that there is no perfect way to a woman's heart. Sm actually njoy being molested. Imagine
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Gofwane(m): 11:42am On Nov 23, 2017
Jupxter:
Too much heat cheesy
i don't understand what you mean
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody: 11:44am On Nov 23, 2017
antysocial:
I just concluded that there is no perfect way to a woman's heart. Sm actually njoy being molested. Imagine
If it's this serious you're notin a relationship. A relationship should be 50/50, if a lady lovesyou let her meet you in between, don't go begging. Stop calling or communicating with her. Since she feels you are replaceable, leave her let her go.You will meet better ones after a while. You're enslaving yourself. Get your self esteem back and move on ! Only say hello once in a while but keep her that way ! End the relationship now !
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by antysocial(op): 11:53am On Nov 23, 2017
Altho she doesn't do what can actually make me get angry with her. Infact d highest she does is like sleepn off while we are chatting in d nyt and then waking up in d Morning to say good morning and apologise. I can't get angry cos of that and I can't even feign anger.
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by walepackage(m): 11:58am On Nov 23, 2017
BiggyB242:
When you find yourself in so many abusive relationship, you finally thinks that's the norm.

Many MATURED ladies are looking for you type of person, don't become a monster because you want to impress a lady.
that was when a lady i met in benue also told me if a man has never hit her during the period of dating, its a sign that he dnt really love her.I was like'you mean it'.Some of these ladies are just confuse, or due to their past abusive relationship which has reshape their thinking faculty to see it has normal.Thou,i dont support 'weakling' as a man,you should react to some certain issue but dont hit,abuse or inflict physical pain to her.If she didnt apprechate you for who u are, someone else will do.
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody:
walepackage:
that was when a lady i met in benue also told me if a man has never hit her during the period of dating, its a sign that he dnt really love her.I was like'you mean it'.Some of these ladies are just confuse, or due to their past abusive relationship which has reshape their thinking faculty to see it has normal.Thou,i dont support 'weakling' as a man,you should react to some certain issue but dont hit,abuse or inflict physical pain to her.If she didnt apprechate you for who u are, someone else will do.
They see abuse as the norm,which is why when they meet a gentleman, they feel like i don't deserve such niceness. What is it? What does he see in me? What does he want to do with me? But one attribute of nice guys is they have sharp eyes and see what other guys don't see in a lady. They don't just understand. Any lady that has this issues should be left alone, they've been bastardized by the bad guys in their past relationships and no matter how nice they're treated, they want to return home, " to receive the bad guy's treatment". Leave them bro when we see such species, let them go, imagine going through 7 men and all seven are bad, and the eight treats the lady nice, it will feel unnatural, like he wants her for her goodies, money, beauty, sex and whats not. In the end, the good guy if he tarries a bit, will find a lover that would reciprocate all his acts of love and gentility. This is how it has always been !Every one with what works for him/her !
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by walepackage(m): 12:07pm On Nov 23, 2017
Jupxter:
They see abuse as the norm,which is why when they meet a gentleman, they feel like i don't deserve such niceness. What is it? What does he see in me? What does he want to do with me? But one attribute of nice guys is they have sharp eyes and see what other guys don't see in a lady. They don't just understand. Any lady that has this issues should be left alone, they've been bastardized by the bad guys in their past relationships and no matter how nice they're treated, they want to return home, " to receive the bad guy's treatment". Leave them bro when we see such species, let them go, imagine going through 7 men and all seven are bad, and the eight treats the lady nice, it will feel unnatural, like he wants her for her goodies, money, beauty, sex and whats not. In the end, the bad guy if he tarries a bit, will find a lover that would reciprocate all his acts of love and gentility. This is how it has always been !Every one with what works for him/her !
true said
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody: 12:19pm On Nov 23, 2017
walepackage:
true said
One thing that astonishes me is our character, it's not a woman problem, we pray to God for a kind of person, somehow we meet them, when we meet them, we don't do what we ought to do, when things start deteriorating or the opportunity has passed, we remember the person was exactly what we prayed for. We start rushing to make amends because we were blinded all through the relationship lasted. We become victim of missed opportunities and chances. It has happened to me twice so i know it's an issue that affects both genders. We need to be smart in relationships so we can make the right calls at the right time, other we soon fall out of love even after finding it.

On the other hand, people are victims of their past relationships, my next one will seal the deal i'm sure. But i'll ask how many past relationships have you been in. Once it's more than 5 i may bounce, many of these ladies have been spoilt and damaged by their past relationships and tag along with them, one would end up dealing with alot of needless baggage !
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody: 12:32pm On Nov 23, 2017
walepackage:
that was when a lady i met in benue also told me if a man has never hit her during the period of dating, its a sign that he dnt really love her.I was like'you mean it'.Some of these ladies are just confuse, or due to their past abusive relationship which has reshape their thinking faculty to see it has normal.Thou,i dont support 'weakling' as a man,you should react to some certain issue but dont hit,abuse or inflict physical pain to her.If she didnt apprechate you for who u are, someone else will do.
Never be a weakling in relationship, I can't be in a relationship when I'm not the one in control, and still I haven't hit a woman during my years of dating.
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by LordKO(m):
@OP

You're in a relationship with a very honest, outspoken and smart girl. What she pointed out is your inability to maintain balance between tolerance and pretense - stop being servile towards her. Embrace conscientiousness and eschew unconscientiousness. While the former will make you to always act spontaneously the latter will always make you to act premeditatedly/prejudicially. The truth is that behind every unconscientious person is a hypocrite personified - people of this leanings can always be counted for their servility but the least to expect from them in the long run/when the chips are down is loyalty. There's a thin line between a good guy who's nice attitude and a servile guy who exhibits nice attitudes. She simply needs a good guy and her action showed that she's the cognitive ability to know one when she sees one. However, she's not longing for a bad guy as many contributors above on this thread have erroneously asserted.

Every altruistic, honest, sane and sound person from both genders always long to be in a relationship with a good but no non-sense partner. What they don't long for as a partner is neither a servile nor a bad person.
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody: 1:00pm On Nov 23, 2017
LordKO:
@OP

You're in a relationship with a very honest, outspoken and smart girl. What she pointed out is your inability to maintain balance between tolerance and pretense. Embrace conscientiousness and eschew unconscientiousness. While the former will make you to always act spontaneously the latter will always make you to act premeditatedly/prejudicially. The truth is that behind every unconscientious person is a hypocrite personified - people of this leanings can always be counted for their servility but the least to expect from them in the long run/when the chip is down is loyalty. There's a tiny line between a good guy who's nice attitude and a servile guy who exhibits nice attitudes. She simply need a good guy and her action showed that she's the cognitive ability to know one when she sees one. However, she's not longing for a bad guy as many contributors above on this thread has erroneously asserted.

Every altruistic, honest, sane and sound person from both genders always long to be in a relationship with a good but no non-sense partner. What they don't long for as a partner is neither a servile nor a bad person.
Brilliant perspective. I think we missed it, this is it. Excellent LordKO. I'llimbibe this counsel in my relationships. Loyalty for the long term..Loyalty. Nice. Sounds familiar. Now i understand
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Moranc(m): 1:14pm On Nov 23, 2017
Bro please do as she said my Ex ones told me this. Some ladies dont like guys that pamper them. A word is enough for the wise so that you wont regret.
antysocial:
I was chatting with my gf yesterday and was really priding myself on how I was a perfect guy for any woman. I couldn't believe it when she said I has a flaw. She told me I'm too gentle and Calm. She said I have never we gotten angry with her before . I was like what's wrong with that and she said she doesn't like that . She said she doesn't like me talking nonsense from her even after apologizing and all that. She was like she would just like to see me angry with her , shout on her or smthing. She told me whenever there was an agreement between us and she apologises , she wasn't expecting me to forgive her so easily, at least she expected me to snub her and all that. I have been very confused since yesterday after those statements. I mean : what do girls really want.?
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody: 1:17pm On Nov 23, 2017
ubunja:
THATS WHAT IM ALWAYS TELLING THESE N!GGARS
my brother allow me to explain the issue at hand here:
you argue with your GF and then aim to resolve the quarrels as fast and as painless as possible? good for u,but...
HOW U SEE YOURSELF:"im a gentleman i never make my woman suffer" cool
HOW SHE SEES YOU:"this guy cant even defend his opinions and beliefs against me,a poor weak woman angry angry how the hell is he gonna protect me from the big bad world if he cant defend himself against me huh huh huh angry angry "
and so she begins to resent you.
women are always testing a man to see if he is strong enough to count on.AND MOST GUYS ALWAYS FAIL THESE TESTS.
example: u go on a date and u order different foods. then as u begin to eat she leans over,scoop some of your food from your plate.
WRONG RESPONSE FROM YOU:u chill and laugh and think she is being cute.
RIGHT RESPONSE FROM YOU:u stop her or u scoop some of her food from her own plate.for goodness sake,do something to indicate u are not a 12yr old.
WHY SHE TOOK YOUR FOOD? :she is testing boundaries.how far u will tolerate her daring.testing the limits.your responses will indicate if later on u will tolerate worse things from her.strong men will challange her and indicate they are not a walk over.and by so doing earn her respect.

your crime is that you seem unable to stand up for yourself and bargain to get your way.in her mind that spells LOSER. now she is wondering CAN THIS GUY EVEN STAND UP TO HIS BOSS TO NEGOTIATE A BETTER SALARY SO THE FAMILY DOESNT STARVE? CAN THIS GUY EVEN STAND UP TO THE LANDLORD AND PREVENT US BEING THROWN INTO THE STREETS HOMELESS?CAN THIS GUY CHALLANGE ROBBERS AT NIGHT AND PROTECT THE CHILDREN?
and so far she thinks u cant grin grin
coz u are unable to stand your ground against a weak gal like her
Three Gbosa for u cheesy
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by Nobody: 1:20pm On Nov 23, 2017
Jupxter:
If it's this serious you're notin a relationship. A relationship should be 50/50, if a lady lovesyou let her meet you in between, don't go begging. Stop calling or communicating with her. Since she feels you are replaceable, leave her let her go.You will meet better ones after a while. You're enslaving yourself. Get your self esteem back and move on ! Only say hello once in a while but keep her that way ! End the relationship now !
correct man, u nailed it. I deleted my girlfriend number off my phone and due to some quarrel and she hasn't call me. so I don dey look for another girl and I know I will get better person Dan her
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by TheManofTomorrow(m): 1:25pm On Nov 23, 2017
What I have to say is that most young and immature girls prefers a guy that will verbally and sometimes physically assaults them in the name of catching fun, oh, he is so unpredictable, he acting like a man. When they grow older like 30sometin and are looking for who they will marry, they all now start running to good as gentle guys as marriage materia. I will advice to disregard this Yeye advice's I have been reading all along. Don't pretend to be what you are not and stay real. True it will get u a gal, but both of u won't be able to sustain ur marriage or relationship at the long run. Check all sane men like fashola, adeboye, etc and see how they treat their wife.

If your girlfriend insist on ur attitude towards her, dump her ass before she dumps urs and concentrate on self development. U will meet the ryt one for you

Thatz why there is a high rate of domestic violence and divorce these days.

Peace
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by collins1895: 1:39pm On Nov 23, 2017
the way she wants to be treated is the way u shud give it to her
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by tosyne2much(m): 1:53pm On Nov 23, 2017
walepackage:
that was when a lady i met in benue also told me if a man has never hit her during the period of dating, its a sign that he dnt really love her.I was like'you mean it'.Some of these ladies are just confuse, or due to their past abusive relationship which has reshape their thinking faculty to see it has normal.Thou,i dont support 'weakling' as a man,you should react to some certain issue but dont hit,abuse or inflict physical pain to her.If she didnt apprechate you for who u are, someone else will do.
This is the same thing I'm saying.. Some of them are already used to abuse and any man who can't follow that same way of treating them with abuse is who they will never pay loyalty and respect to
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by walepackage(m): 1:56pm On Nov 23, 2017
BiggyB242:
Never be a weakling in relationship, I can't be in a relationship when I'm not the one in control, and still I haven't hit a woman during my years of dating.
nice one.There are better approaches to solve issues with one's spouse.Cheers
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by tosyne2much(m): 2:05pm On Nov 23, 2017
Jupxter:
They see abuse as the norm,which is why when they meet a gentleman, they feel like i don't deserve such niceness. What is it? What does he see in me? What does he want to do with me? But one attribute of nice guys is they have sharp eyes and see what other guys don't see in a lady. They don't just understand. Any lady that has this issues should be left alone, they've been bastardized by the bad guys in their past relationships and no matter how nice they're treated, they want to return home, " to receive the bad guy's treatment". Leave them bro when we see such species, let them go, imagine going through 7 men and all seven are bad, and the eight treats the lady nice, it will feel unnatural, like he wants her for her goodies, money, beauty, sex and whats not. In the end, the good guy if he tarries a bit, will find a lover that would reciprocate all his acts of love and gentility. This is how it has always been !Every one with what works for him/her !
This is where you nailed it bro... Sometimes, I do not blame guys who treat ladies badly because some ladies'characters actually warrant such treatment. I have personally come across ladies who say they can only be handled by guys that can use resounding slap to call them to order cheesy cheesy

Nice guys are mostly taken for granted for their calmness and gentility and that's why ladies often take advantage of many of them
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by walepackage(m): 2:07pm On Nov 23, 2017
tosyne2much:
This is the same thing I'm saying.. Some of them are already used to abuse and any man who can't follow that same way of treating them with abuse is who they will never pay loyalty and respect to
walahi i was shock when this girl said that.You are right,but i still believe abusing ones spouse/gf in a relationship dont makes someone though.Thou,i told her i have my reservations and limits.It will take along period for these type of ladies to change this kind of impression they has formed in thier subconscious.
Re: I Couldn't Believe It When My Gf Told Me This by rman: 2:12pm On Nov 23, 2017
kay29000:
I don't know o! Women are so complicated. I can never forget this girl I liked so much (as a friend) back in my teen days. She had this guy that used to beat her anyhow. One day, I saved her from the guy's beating, and she was so thankful and all. The next day, I saw her on Okada with the guy, holding tightly to the guy and smiling. I swear, the Gala I was eating fell out of my mouth.

It is like that movie, The Last American Virgin... The virgin guy helped the girl get an abortion when her 'bad boy' boyfriend abandoned her. He cared for her till she got better, and the next thing he knew, she was back with the bad guy at the end. The nice guy cried his eyes out. The movie was actually based on a true story. Most women don't like nice guys. #Fact


To be honest, I don't understand women, and I am not trying to understand them. I would rather try to understand money better.
Very good example of how ladies run back to guys that treat them badly "LAST AMERICAN VIRGIN"

The sound track "OH NO" by Lionel Richie is a very good song....
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