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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) (2021 Views)
Young Men Should Drop This Attitude. / "After 14 Years Of Dating, He Came To Pay My Bride Price" - Beautiful Lady Says / 10 Silly Things Men Should Stop This Year!!... (2) (3) (4)
Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by TheUpsetGirl(m): 2:14am On Mar 02, 2018 |
Once men pay bride price they think you've automatically become their property especially Nigerian men. This results in a lot of nasty things like domestic abuse and other stuffs. if you two purchases things together he'll use his own name to buy the things which is very ridiculous all because he paid your bride price. Because he paid your bride price he'll think you must not say no whenever he wants to have sex with you, In civilized countries if you have sex with your wife without her consent it is called rape and if she reports you and the case is investigated you may be indicted but here in Nigeria and Africa at large as long as men keep paying bride price you're obliged to always consent to sex I think by stopping men from paying bride price all these nonsense are going to stop. Nairalanders what do you guys think? 1 Like |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Dcholeric: 2:27am On Mar 02, 2018 |
wait.... day break they will come for you. by the way I don't know what to comment, I just heard of birth price this moment , I use to know of bride price... thanks for the enlightenment. modified ..................... give me credit for pointing out a mistake. |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by makkosky(m): 2:29am On Mar 02, 2018 |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by dingbang(m): 3:00am On Mar 02, 2018 |
I think you need to repeat school from the beginning...after than can we tell you what we think 1 Like |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Nobody: 3:07am On Mar 02, 2018 |
............. space booked. Will comment at dawn |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by TheUpsetGirl(m): 3:47am On Mar 02, 2018 |
dingbang: repeated.. I was only sleepy and please broke boys are not allowed to quote me. |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by dingbang(m): 3:50am On Mar 02, 2018 |
TheUpsetGirl:if this mumu come my branch now, na zero Acc balance I go see for her account.. Swerve biko. |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by FluidQueen(f): 6:13am On Mar 02, 2018 |
It is A barbaric custom that needs to be abolished. Women are not properties that need to be acquired. If it's so fantastic a tradition, why isn't it paid on men? Bride price is a very degrading practice, indeed. It gives men this feeling of ownership. It creates an impression that one party was negotiated and paid for, one party was acquired, Why another was the acquirer. It is harmful and simply subtle Slavery. The basis of screwed maragial concept and male superiority complex. It isn't a christian act But a Jewish One. Why then, are Christians propagating this madness? 2 Likes |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Nobody: 6:56am On Mar 02, 2018 |
Ok sis let me explain why I do not agree with your conclusions: The practice of paying for the bride price is erroneously misconstrued as such a dehumanizing practice to women, especially from a Western point of view. Parents perceive that their daughters are being maltreated by wicked husbands on the excuse that they have been paid for, like a “commodity”. And while many blame this derision on families that take advantage of the Bride Price to make outrageous demands, others believe that how a man treats his woman may not necessarily depend on whether or not he paid her Bride Price, but greatly on his personality. Saying men maltreat their wives because they paid their Bride Price is like saying the expensive diamond engagement rings also produce women-beaters in the West. For the christians amongst us, in the Bible Jacob served 14 years as a Price to marry Rachel; a “Bride Service” that portrayed the value he placed on her – which is what the token called Bride Price is all about. In this modern era, it appears many are not aware that the Bride Price serves to protect the marriage from dissolution. It is NOT degrading to women and does not reduce them to slaves; not in any way tantamount to making a man feel like a slave master who owns a slave he has paid for. In actual fact, Bride Price is an instrument to ratify a marriage. It is one of the highest honours confirming a bride’s value and womanhood; giving a husband the full rights to the sexual, economic, or procreative powers of his wife. It fosters a friendly relationship between the two families; providing a material pledge that the woman and her children will be well treated and a level of compensation to her family for the loss of her company and labour. No amount of money can buy a wife; her value is inestimable in human terms. No man can pay for all the input of those who raised a good woman and all the benefits she brings; her love, care, help and companionship far outweigh any monetary value. A Bride Price is a humble demonstration of appreciation, honour and respect to the bride’s family for all the work they put into raising/training “this” gift from God and returning it seems utterly disrespectful to the groom and his entire family. There are no few good men, rather there still are a lot of good men. It's just so unfortunate some women end up with the bad ones. My 2 cents P/S- I am still learning this whole marriage stuff as this dude will be settling down soon 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by don4real18(m): 7:12am On Mar 02, 2018 |
FluidQueen:Jewish my foot... It is our culture and tradition and shouldn't be thrown away for Western ideology. I will be glad to pay the Bride price for my future wife without the feeling of acquiring a property 2 Likes |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by FluidQueen(f): 7:14am On Mar 02, 2018 |
efesodje:Why do the society think they need to affirm a woman's worth and value? If its so thoughtful, why don't women affirm a man's value and worth by Paying the groom price too? Why can't we appreciate you too? Why can't we simply thank the groom's family for bringing up such a handsome, Amazing and kind hearted man? Or are we just equivalent to a purchase? Lol. It's ridiculous, isn't it? Why is the rationale for the concept being tailored to one gender? All it symbolizes is female subjugation, no euphemism can change it! It's the basis for female discrimination, and prejudice. I paid on your head, you must obey me. I married you, you didn't marry me. These are subtle sexist practice that should be removed. 2 Likes |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by FluidQueen(f): 7:20am On Mar 02, 2018 |
don4real18:you're simply acquiring a property. Reason your elders would ask for a return of the bride price when anyone of you want the marriage no more. Same way you'd return something you bought which you're not satisfied with, and you get a refund. Purchase. Slavery. 2 Likes |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Nobody: 7:24am On Mar 02, 2018 |
dingbang: |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Nobody: 7:25am On Mar 02, 2018 |
FluidQueen: At the bold face, a dowry (paid by the bride's family to the groom's family) is practiced in countries like Turkey, Iran,Egypt,Morocco, India,Bangladesh,Pakistan,Nepal,Sri Lanka, Afghanistan et al. So it's done. Your other points are rants of a typical Misogynist 3 Likes |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by derrydinny: 7:28am On Mar 02, 2018 |
efesodje:I support you, the bride will have to leave her parent's house and they will take it (B.P) as a form of consolation since they will miss the care and labour of the lady since in old times, most men lived in their father's compound. In india where women pay dowry, they are still being made to suffer, worse than nigerian women are suffering. 2 Likes |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Nobody: 7:29am On Mar 02, 2018 |
They don't "think" you are property, they Know you are property that they bought with cold cash money 1 Like
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Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Gofwane(m): 7:34am On Mar 02, 2018 |
Don't blame men, blame your parents for selling you out at a price. Sometimes they will even be bargaining with the groom's family as if na Broiler chicken dey wan sell |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by FluidQueen(f): 8:38am On Mar 02, 2018 |
efesodje:Lol. The dowry thingy is a whole different ballgame. It's a gift given to the groom's family. In places like India, it's used to appreciate a man for finding a woman worthy. It's more like a 'thank you for marrying me' thing. Dowry paid by women and bride price paid by men yield the same result. The woman is considered a property. 3 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Nobody: 9:15am On Mar 02, 2018 |
FluidQueen: Yeah you're right, the Bride Price is actually the opposite of a Dowry. My bad The woman being considered a property is new to me. As for The Woman Being Considered a Property, I'll just leave you with sage words from Master Yoda The woman is not the property of the man. She chose to be yours, not vice versa! 1 Like |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Lionessza(f): 9:59am On Mar 02, 2018 |
Bride price( I hate that translation , btw. It's un - african and used to ridicule indigenous African customs ). Anyway , the payment of " bride price " is not the problem, the problem is the kind of man you chose to marry. There are many cultures that don't pay this , but the women still get the same treatment you are complaining about. But I also do understand that some parents these days , use this practice to enrich themselves, making the husband feel he acquired a commodity . Again, the custom is not to blame here , your greedy parents are. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by TheMaleCulture: 10:07am On Mar 02, 2018 |
FluidQueen: Start with yourself. Pay groom price abeg, sensitize all your female siblings and relatives that they must pay groom price. You can start the female activism movement from your house. Charity begins at home, end of discussion. Update the progress here from time to time okay. 2 Likes |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by femolacqua(m): 10:08am On Mar 02, 2018 |
efesodje:You just hit the nail on the head bro, nice point. |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by IAMSASHY(f): 10:09am On Mar 02, 2018 |
dis a very simple issue, simply tell your own man not to pay ur bride price instead of dragging all of us into it. |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by vicben27(m): 11:10am On Mar 02, 2018 |
all ya dumb girls making noise about bride price, if you dont want a man to pay ur bride price dont get married. feel free to keep fuccking every Dick and harry! stupid talk. 1 Like |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by McBrooklyn(m): 11:17am On Mar 02, 2018 |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Nobody: 11:29am On Mar 02, 2018 |
efesodje:
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Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Nobody: 11:37am On Mar 02, 2018 |
FluidQueen:"thank u for marrying me" and "thank u for bringing up such a queen" which one sounds more disrepectful? 1 Like |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by frankkydee(m): 11:38am On Mar 02, 2018 |
FluidQueen: All of that will always leads to gender equality issue in the marriage because no woman want to hear i paid your pride price not you. And the woman will always feel pained by such statements. Bride price it's good in itself but most families sees it as a do or die affair. |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by kpaofame: 11:53am On Mar 02, 2018 |
A violent man is a violent man irrespective of the bride price...they are some 'marriages' where the man did not pay bride price... Cohabiting as some will say, yet violence still ensue, even if the lady pays the money to marry a guy, if he is violent he will still molest her... As for sex in marriage, i feel that is a rant of disgruntled and unfortunate individual... No body force you to say Yes or sign to marry, you should have a mutual understanding or know the fellow you say yes to and what it entails... If you are not ready for the heat dont get into the kitchen... Lack of love and communication between both man and wife result in the above tho |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by Nobody: 3:49pm On Mar 02, 2018 |
wait o, is it by force to get married?? if you can't tolerate such then swerve jor. only an idiot marries a woman he will have to write an application letter for sex anytime he wants it. |
Re: Men Should Be Stopped From Paying Bride Price(reasons) by FeminineSniper(m): 4:42pm On Mar 02, 2018 |
TheUpsetGirl: Dear UpsetGirl, It is obvious u are upset and i guess i understand how you feel. Let me quickly butress this before you choke on this your upset state,are you aware that when you took a vow in marriage it was said that; and two shall become one. let me now ask you, when you are hungry and not in fasting mode nor sick,do you deprive yourself of food? Now tell yourself that it is not by force to get married. now that you have successfully told yourself that, go and masturbate no more |
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