₦airaland Forum

To those who warned me about "dating" on this site,, thank you but don't worry. I won't fall for that.
I can't get myself to start online dating in general. I would rather find someone in a more organic way

lefulefu:
ur madam dey around?

. .she dey oo, she nor wan go sleep oo

maybe she just wan observ my movement na

Pat081:
d guy is telling u d bitter true n u re here crying why can u carry ur own cross by ur self

What bitter truth..... not surprise

How is you doing? You come across as a free spirited person. Have you ever been a feminist??

Lalas247:
OK ...I forgive you go and sin no more

Gcpc:
To those who warned me about "dating" on this site,, thank you but don't worry. I won't fall for that.
I can't get myself to start online dating in general. I would rather find someone in a more organic way

...


my dear try those who have applied na,

DonPiiko:
How is you doing? You come across as a free spirited person. Have you ever been a feminist??

lol dunno what that means ... is it a money making venture this your feminism .....

Martin0:
.
.she dey oo, she nor wan go sleep oo


maybe she just wan observ my movement na

she no trust yu na

My wife said it was canvassing for equality for both sexes but we have the online version, that preach anti-men

Lalas247:
lol dunno what that means ... is it a money making venture this your feminism .....

U dnt hv to tell us wot u have n wot u dnt hv n hope u re nt d type that always do am too big to b under any man so far I have my own money no man can order mi arund like little kids ,so work on ur self 1st n my prayer for you is dat God will do d best 4u [color=#006600][/color]

Gcpc:
Hi all,

I'm a single mum to a 2.5 yo girl and I'm about to turn 39.
My baby's father is out of the picture. He bailed on me while pregnant and only came back after 2 years and me taking him to court.
Now he wants to "take things where we left them" but my understanding and gut feeling is he just wants free passes with me.

I made so many mistakes with my dating life that I find myself in this horrible position of being a single mother about to hit the big 4.

I have a great job, a career, enough money to be comfortable, a wonderful child, family and friends but I still feel lonely and depressed at times.
I neve envisioned this life for myself and never imagined never marrying.

I've been working on myself, working out, finding new hobbies, building up my self confidence but I don't know how in the world I would or could find a man.

Is there any chance someone like me could find a decent man to share my life with ?

DonPiiko:
How is you doing? You come across as a free spirited person. Have you ever been a feminist??

feminist ke?
u see any bitter bone in her?
she"s just a strong indenpendent boss lady

Yeah, I saw someone up there referring to her as one, I was genuinely surprised. I like Lalas she's different and friendly

lefulefu:
feminist ke?
u see any bitter bone in her?
she"s just a strong indenpendent boss lady

DonPiiko:
My wife said it was canvassing for equality for both sexes but we have the online version, that preach anti-men

what's my business with that...I don't have time for such .. ...
going to bed you just bored me night night dear ...

lefulefu:
feminist ke?
u see any bitter bone in her?
she"s just a strong indenpendent boss lady

u know me ... work hard play harder
night night

lefulefu:
she no trust yu na

.
hahahah hahahahaha hahahahaha guy make anybody nor trust me oo I dey come make I do small romance video make she for sleep abeg

DonPiiko:
Yeah, I saw someone up there referring to her as one, I was genuinely surprised. I like Lalas she's different and friendly

hmm someone list lala as nl feminist?
na waoh...

Hmmmm, sober reading.
Anyways, you sound exposed and enlightened. I wish you all you wish yourself.

biacan:
What bitter truth..... not surprise

that u should talk for urself only , nt every gals ,wot make u sad can make others happy ppy

Martin0:
.
hahahah hahahahaha hahahahaha guy make anybody nor trust me oo I dey come make I do small romance video make she for sleep abeg

haha

Lalas247:
u know me ... work hard play harder
night night

sleep tight

Pat081:
that u should talk for urself only , nt every gals ,wot make u sad can make others happy ppy

Are you girls
Is girls you
You we girls
Girls we you..... That's how sound right now

Martin0:
.
hahahah hahahahaha hahahahaha guy make anybody nor trust me oo I dey come make I do small romance video make she for sleep abeg

Greet her for me

DonPiiko:
but we have the online version, that preach anti-men

nairaland version

biacan:
Are you girls
Is girls you
You we girls
Girls we you..... That's how sound right now

dnt ve time dis night but ............c u tomorrow

Goodnight with tears in my eyes and a deep pain in my heart

Lalas247:
what's my business with that...I don't have time for such .. ...
going to bed you just bored me night night dear ...

That Donstan chic na the ringleader

lefulefu:
nairaland version

DonPiiko:
That Donstan chic na the ringleader

eh?..donstan na guy oo
u dey call am chic?

Nope dem get 1 chic wey 2 of them dey always tackle themselves, no she be the leader of the feminist gang for NL, that hiighqueen friend, I can't remember her moniker again

lefulefu:
eh?..donstan na guy oo
u dey call am chic?

DonPiiko:
Nope dem get 1 chic wey 2 of them dey always tackle themselves, no she be the leader of the feminist gang for NL, that hiighqueen friend, I can't remember her moniker again

Gcpc:
Yes, if my experience can help any young lady out there, here is my take on it. This will be a long a$$ post (sorry). Forgive my syntax, English is not my first langage. So only for those interested:

IMO I made 3 major mistakes:

1- I waited too long to enter the dating scene. I thought I had to compartmentalize : finish school, get a job, than find a man. I kept pushing away suitors, probably good ones in my 20s because I didn't want any distraction from getting that big flashy degree I wanted. The truth is finding a good match is like anything else. it takes practice. you need to date, to get out there, fall in love, get your heart broken, learn how to act in a relationship, kiss a few frogs in order to find that special person. I'm not talking about sleeping around but dating.
I did not, so when I started a relationship I was clueless and awkward at an age I was not supposed to be. Plus, those college years are your best shot at finding Mr. right. You have a very good social network and the dating pool is endless. Most of my GF met their husbands in college

2- I thought being a successful career women with money, being smart, modest and reserved would land me tones of good suitors.Turns out I was wrong. Most of my GF who made "good" marriages are unemployed, dropped out of college or have low profile jobs. They are very good looking and are very feminine in their demeanor. Most of them are happily married with lot of kids. Me on the other hand, once I left college, I realized most men my age were in relationships. I was working so I didn't have much time to socialize and meet new people. The guys I met were afraid of me because of my job and the kind of money I was making. I guess they thought I had to be bossy or not submissive enough or too much to deal with...

3- I lingered in bad relationships even when I knew deep down it wasn't working.I would tell myself that "everyone has flows" and accept behaviors that I should not have accepted. I thought I would eventually change the guy (how silly right ?). Finally I allowed men to string me along.
I've been in 3 relationships.

The first one was a guy I was so much in love with. He was out of college and unemployed when we started dating. I knew from the get go that he had at least one other woman in is life. I let people convinced me that I could not find any really single guy and that the rule of the game was to get with a guy, be the best girlfriend and get chosen. So for 3 years I waited for him to choose me. I helped him financially until he got a government job and he made me believe he was about to propose. Then one day I got confronted in his house while he was out; the girl tracked us to make sure I was there alone, came and told me she was pregnant for him. I was devastated. I left and he tried to win me back, to apologized etc. He told me she was not pregnant . I was about to cave when HE ghosted me, out of the blue... I later found out that this girl and I were both side chicks. He married his long time girlfriend and had a baby with her. Mind you I was a 100% blindsided. He introduced me to his entire family. His sisters would call me "wifey"; I thought I was the "main girl" and I was OK with that. No woman should never be OK with being 1 among many.

I was still recovering from this mess when a friend set me up for a blind date. I told him I wanted to meet a christian guy with strong religious values. We hit it off at the first date. He was a bit older and mature. he seemed too good to be true. I had this little voice inside me telling me to get out. I didn't listen to my own instinct. He was so pushy and moving so fast that within 6 months we were engaged, getting married in the next month and moving in together. I moved in after our parents met and his family gave mine the traditional dowry. One day my computer just crashed; I had to borrow his. That's when I found out he had multiple accounts set in gay dating sites. I confronted him, he denied but I called of the engagement off and moved out

All this time I was friend with my baby's father. We met at an alumni reunion. We attended the same business school but not the same years.
At the time he hit on me, I told him I had someone so we became "friends". after my breakup. I was a mess and he was there for me. I was not interested in him, not attracted at all but he kept pursuing me for so long that eventually, I convinced myself that he had to be genuinely into me to be that persistent. My GF told me that sometimes you fall in love while dating so I decided to give it a shot. It was terrible. We kept fighting and arguing for everything; I knew I had to break up but I was scared to be alone and I was 33 by the time I realized it was never going to work. I wanted children so I thought it was too late for me to start over with someone new. I thought I would have to settle for this half baked relationship so I decided to cave to all his demands and be the woman he wanted so we could take it to the next level. he kept promising to do just that. He was stringing me along. eventually he told me we should start trying for a baby and that we would get married afterward. Now I know he said that just as another way of stringing me because I found out that I had fertility issues. So he probably thought I would never get pregnant anyway. So when I did he was mad, pressured me to get an abortion and finally left me when I refused.
He went Mia during my pregnancy and until the baby was 6 month. I had to take him to court before he came to see the baby and put his name on her birth certificate. It took 6 more months for him to start paying child support.
He sees her once a month and every time he comes, he tries to sleep with me. I finally told him that if he wanted us back together he had to make it right this time. He had to go to my parents and make it official.
He said he's not ready for that and told me 2 days ago he would not be arround much in the coming weeks...


So now here I am, in the sunken place, trying to get out of my pity party.

it is well with you.

briandaman:
i am interested in you. You sound matured and women your age know what they want I need a woman like you try me +27768425035

After letting out that trash u put up there you now drop your number asking her to call you shay.. If according to you, life ends at '30', why ask a 39 yr old to get in touch with you, or did you not read that part in her post? You will make her life worse

To be honest with you,start looking for white men. They will be easier It will be difficult to find a Nigerian man to date or marry.

MadamedeBosse:
To be honest with you,start looking for white men. They will be easier It will be difficult to find a Nigerian man to date or marry.

lol..... you think so?