Hi all,

I'm a single mum to a 2.5 yo girl and I'm about to turn 39.
My baby's father is out of the picture. He bailed on me while pregnant and only came back after 2 years and me taking him to court.
Now he wants to "take things where we left them" but my understanding and gut feeling is he just wants free passes with me.

I made so many mistakes with my dating life that I find myself in this horrible position of being a single mother about to hit the big 4.

I have a great job, a career, enough money to be comfortable, a wonderful child, family and friends but I still feel lonely and depressed at times.
I neve envisioned this life for myself and never imagined never marrying.

I've been working on myself, working out, finding new hobbies, building up my self confidence but I don't know how in the world I would or could find a man.

Is there any chance someone like me could find a decent man to share my life with ?

reach me on 07039763685 .we could talk

Definitely there is but you have to be very careful as a lot of men will just take an advantage to you.. Don't be so desperate to look for the right guy.. Juz go with the flow and u better have a background check before taking him seriously..

Good luck..

QueenSuccubus:


Definitely there is but you have to be very careful as a lot of men will just take an advantage to you.. Don't be so desperate to look for the right guy.. Juz go with the flow and u better have a background check before taking him seriously..

Good luck..

Experience

A man will never ever make you feel complete!

my dear start with loving yourself .. selflove is a powerful thing.. once you don't need a man it will come .. don't get desperate that way you wont allow stray dogs into your home..

you have a beautiful daughter. that is who you should be living for trust me.

there is always someone out there if its meant to be ... go traveling , holidays infact you can relocate your child is still very young. fresh start being a single mum isn't the end of the world

remember life begins at 40

Lalas247:


A man will never ever make you feel complete!

my dear start with loving yourself .. selflove is a powerful thing.. once you don't need a man it will come .. don't get desperate that way you wont allow stray dogs into your home..

you have a beautiful daughter. that is who you should be living for trust me.

there is always someone out there if its meant to be ... go traveling , holidays infact you can relocate your child is still very young. fresh start being a single mum isn't the end of the world

remember life begins at 40

I know you're right. Believe me, my baby girl is the center of my universe. I also know that no man can make me happy. It's not about that. I am happy. I praise God everyday for the life, health and love he allows my loved ones and myself to enjoy. I'm grateful.
It's just that some days, when my baby's sleeping and I'm sitting on my couch alone, I would love to have someone to snuggle up to. Someone to share the details of my difficult day at work or laugh about the last baby tantrum I had to deal with

Gcpc:
Hi all,

I'm a single mum to a 2.5 yo girl and I'm about to turn 39.
My baby's father is out of the picture. He bailed on me while pregnant and only came back after 2 years and me taking him to court.
Now he wants to "take things where we left them" but my understanding and gut feeling is he just wants free passes with me.

I made so many mistakes with my dating life that I find myself in this horrible position of being a single mother about to hit the big 4.


I have a great job, a career, enough money to be comfortable, a wonderful child, family and friends but I still feel lonely and depressed at times.
I never envisioned this life for myself and never imagined never marrying.

I've been working on myself, working out, finding new hobbies, building up my self confidence but I don't know how in the world I would or could find a man.

Is there any chance someone like me could find a decent man to share my life with ?

Our young girls should learn from your plight...Lalas made good points.

Just be careful. Men can be dangerous and may take advantage of your age and use it as a free pass. Making u feel worse

Go on a dating website... put yourself out there. Use Fb insta, market yourself well and drop whatever hang ups you have about your situation, like needing to explain your situation. It comes across as if you have a problem with it which is off putting. Knowing yourself and your wants and where you are in life is attractive so don't feel you need to apologise for it or make any excuses for it. Be unapologetically fabulous and you will find your equal.

First and foremost , love yourself and your kid which I can deduce from your post you are already doing ..
Secondly, don't just go for any man out of desperation, your decision in choosing a man must be based on the man's love for your beautiful kid..The man must love your kid as he loves you..Some men actually find it hard to cope with another man's kid and you know it's a journey that no one knows the end..
Don't discminitate so much about age cos men of your age caliber would have gotten kids or married. You can still see a single man who will love you for who you are..
I wish you luck cos life alone doesn't worth it .. You can reach me for us to talk better ..

is not a mistake jor.. after u don use all d good men do shakara finish.. mitcheeeew.

Be attending churches maybe God go answer ur prayers

Lalas247:


A man will never ever make you feel complete!

my dear start with loving yourself .. selflove is a powerful thing.. once you don't need a man it will come .. don't get desperate that way you wont allow stray dogs into your home..

you have a beautiful daughter. that is who you should be living for trust me.

there is always someone out there if its meant to be ... go traveling , holidays infact you can relocate your child is still very young. fresh start being a single mum isn't the end of the world

remember life begins at 40

another failure

Drchristian:
is not a mistake jor.. after u don use all d good men do shakara finish.. mitcheeeew.

Be attending churches maybe God go answer ur prayers

Yahoo boy, we haff hear

Keep your hopes alive always. Answers to your prayers will come in the most unexpected ways. Someone is looking for someone that fits your profile out there, you doubt?

Let's talk, 08082565513

nwanneni:
another failure

You will not get the attention you're seeking

Gcpc:
Hi all,

I'm a single mum to a 2.5 yo girl and I'm about to turn 39.
My baby's father is out of the picture. He bailed on me while pregnant and only came back after 2 years and me taking him to court.
Now he wants to "take things where we left them" but my understanding and gut feeling is he just wants free passes with me.

I made so many mistakes with my dating life that I find myself in this horrible position of being a single mother about to hit the big 4.

I have a great job, a career, enough money to be comfortable, a wonderful child, family and friends but I still feel lonely and depressed at times.
I neve envisioned this life for myself and never imagined never marrying.

I've been working on myself, working out, finding new hobbies, building up my self confidence but I don't know how in the world I would or could find a man.

Is there any chance someone like me could find a decent man to share my life with ?

love will find you when you focus on improving your self..

LivingFree:


You will not get the attention you're seeking

seeking attention from whom?My dear I'll pass.besides,I am not an entertainer so I don't care about self publicity.thanks

Send me an email, There are things we could possibly be on the same page about

Will drop my comment after my nap

Gcpc:


I know you're right. Believe me, my baby girl is the center of my universe. I also know that no man can make me happy. It's not about that. I am happy. I praise God everyday for the life, health and love he allows my loved ones and myself to enjoy. I'm grateful.
It's just that some days, when my baby's sleeping and I'm sitting on my couch alone, I would love to have someone to snuggle up to. Someone to share the details of my difficult day at work or laugh about the last baby tantrum I had to deal with

I know dear....
it can't be easy .. just be strong and carry on doing the best you can .. I'm a strong believer that God blesses those who strive to do the right thing ....

you will have the last laugh..

LivingFree:


You will not get the attention you're seeking

lols ... mans reaching

Go out more, hang out with friends. Don't be an introvert. You need to go out for you to meet men.

But you also need to be careful. There are too many laid back guys looking for a well to do lady to leech on.

My regards to your kid

Life doesn't begin at 40 it ends at 30. By the time you hit 30 life is done. Let's not lie to this poor woman please

Gcpc:
Hi all,

I'm a single mum to a 2.5 yo girl and I'm about to turn 39.
My baby's father is out of the picture. He bailed on me while pregnant and only came back after 2 years and me taking him to court.
Now he wants to "take things where we left them" but my understanding and gut feeling is he just wants free passes with me.

I made so many mistakes with my dating life that I find myself in this horrible position of being a single mother about to hit the big 4.

I have a great job, a career, enough money to be comfortable, a wonderful child, family and friends but I still feel lonely and depressed at times.
I neve envisioned this life for myself and never imagined never marrying.

I've been working on myself, working out, finding new hobbies, building up my self confidence but I don't know how in the world I would or could find a man.

Is there any chance someone like me could find a decent man to share my life with ?

i am interested in you. You sound matured and women your age know what they want I need a woman like you try me +27768425035

peace of mind and life without stress. your happiness doesn't depend on others.
08183416747 I can only keep your company anything more than that am off

austyn0:
Our young girls should learn from your plight...Lalas made good points.

Yes, if my experience can help any young lady out there, here is my take on it. This will be a long a$$ post (sorry). Forgive my syntax, English is not my first langage. So only for those interested:

IMO I made 3 major mistakes:

1- I waited too long to enter the dating scene. I thought I had to compartmentalize : finish school, get a job, than find a man. I kept pushing away suitors, probably good ones in my 20s because I didn't want any distraction from getting that big flashy degree I wanted. The truth is finding a good match is like anything else. it takes practice. you need to date, to get out there, fall in love, get your heart broken, learn how to act in a relationship, kiss a few frogs in order to find that special person. I'm not talking about sleeping around but dating.
I did not, so when I started a relationship I was clueless and awkward at an age I was not supposed to be. Plus, those college years are your best shot at finding Mr. right. You have a very good social network and the dating pool is endless. Most of my GF met their husbands in college

2- I thought being a successful career women with money, being smart, modest and reserved would land me tones of good suitors.Turns out I was wrong. Most of my GF who made "good" marriages are unemployed, dropped out of college or have low profile jobs. They are very good looking and are very feminine in their demeanor. Most of them are happily married with lot of kids. Me on the other hand, once I left college, I realized most men my age were in relationships. I was working so I didn't have much time to socialize and meet new people. The guys I met were afraid of me because of my job and the kind of money I was making. I guess they thought I had to be bossy or not submissive enough or too much to deal with...

3- I lingered in bad relationships even when I knew deep down it wasn't working.I would tell myself that "everyone has flows" and accept behaviors that I should not have accepted. I thought I would eventually change the guy (how silly right ?). Finally I allowed men to string me along.
I've been in 3 relationships.

The first one was a guy I was so much in love with. He was out of college and unemployed when we started dating. I knew from the get go that he had at least one other woman in is life. I let people convinced me that I could not find any really single guy and that the rule of the game was to get with a guy, be the best girlfriend and get chosen. So for 3 years I waited for him to choose me. I helped him financially until he got a government job and he made me believe he was about to propose. Then one day I got confronted in his house while he was out; the girl tracked us to make sure I was there alone, came and told me she was pregnant for him. I was devastated. I left and he tried to win me back, to apologized etc. He told me she was not pregnant . I was about to cave when HE ghosted me, out of the blue... I later found out that this girl and I were both side chicks. He married his long time girlfriend and had a baby with her. Mind you I was a 100% blindsided. He introduced me to his entire family. His sisters would call me "wifey"; I thought I was the "main girl" and I was OK with that. No woman should never be OK with being 1 among many.

I was still recovering from this mess when a friend set me up for a blind date. I told him I wanted to meet a christian guy with strong religious values. We hit it off at the first date. He was a bit older and mature. he seemed too good to be true. I had this little voice inside me telling me to get out. I didn't listen to my own instinct. He was so pushy and moving so fast that within 6 months we were engaged, getting married in the next month and moving in together. I moved in after our parents met and his family gave mine the traditional dowry. One day my computer just crashed; I had to borrow his. That's when I found out he had multiple accounts set in gay dating sites. I confronted him, he denied but I called of the engagement off and moved out

All this time I was friend with my baby's father. We met at an alumni reunion. We attended the same business school but not the same years.
At the time he hit on me, I told him I had someone so we became "friends". after my breakup. I was a mess and he was there for me. I was not interested in him, not attracted at all but he kept pursuing me for so long that eventually, I convinced myself that he had to be genuinely into me to be that persistent. My GF told me that sometimes you fall in love while dating so I decided to give it a shot. It was terrible. We kept fighting and arguing for everything; I knew I had to break up but I was scared to be alone and I was 33 by the time I realized it was never going to work. I wanted children so I thought it was too late for me to start over with someone new. I thought I would have to settle for this half baked relationship so I decided to cave to all his demands and be the woman he wanted so we could take it to the next level. he kept promising to do just that. He was stringing me along. eventually he told me we should start trying for a baby and that we would get married afterward. Now I know he said that just as another way of stringing me because I found out that I had fertility issues. So he probably thought I would never get pregnant anyway. So when I did he was mad, pressured me to get an abortion and finally left me when I refused.
He went Mia during my pregnancy and until the baby was 6 month. I had to take him to court before he came to see the baby and put his name on her birth certificate. It took 6 more months for him to start paying child support.
He sees her once a month and every time he comes, he tries to sleep with me. I finally told him that if he wanted us back together he had to make it right this time. He had to go to my parents and make it official.
He said he's not ready for that and told me 2 days ago he would not be arround much in the coming weeks...


So now here I am, in the sunken place, trying to get out of my pity party.

Gcpc:
Hi all,

I'm a single mum to a 2.5 yo girl and I'm about to turn 39.
My baby's father is out of the picture. He bailed on me while pregnant and only came back after 2 years and me taking him to court.
Now he wants to "take things where we left them" but my understanding and gut feeling is he just wants free passes with me.

I made so many mistakes with my dating life that I find myself in this horrible position of being a single mother about to hit the big 4.

I have a great job, a career, enough money to be comfortable, a wonderful child, family and friends but I still feel lonely and depressed at times.
I neve envisioned this life for myself and never imagined never marrying.

I've been working on myself, working out, finding new hobbies, building up my self confidence but I don't know how in the world I would or could find a man.

Is there any chance someone like me could find a decent man to share my life with ?

If you are in nigeria chances are really slim unless you are rich. Just be positive don't give it too much attention so you don't appear kinda desperate and be taken advantage of. Just be positive, happy and live your life while leaving your doors open. If it will happen it's sure gonna happen. Cheers. Marriage is not about love well not entirely if you and the father of your daughter understand each other. You should go give him a chance.

Contact me on 07038681462

I'm officially depressed

Op... all you? Every possible cliché, finished

Lol, kids don start to drop their contacts