kmcutez:


When they tell women to marry from their class, they refuse to listen. Now the wife has married a poor man with poverty mentality. Imagine dragging property with your wife, and you are not ashamed. Tufia!!!.

I dey vex gan. Your wife is too nice in wanting to add your name to the property. If I'm your wife you go hear am. Nonsense and ingredient. As if it's not your children that will inherit the property.

Assuming you die today, your same family with poverty mentality will start dragging the property with your wife.

Nonsense and ingredient. Hahahahahaha!!!! This got me soo baaaaaddd!! Don't mind the fool that calls himself a man. He thought he's wise he doesn't know that his wife is 'wiser' and 'wisest'. Damn!!

Well, in my opinion, they both had some wrong doings, but pride won't allow them concede to each other. They are both contending for who will have the last laugh.
Solution: Husband, love your wife. Wife, submit to your husband.

spongeisback:
It's only a wicked person that would support him. The wife even tried to cover him up and he came to disgrace himself. How can you send your wife packing because of an argument

God bless your wisdom. I noticed how his wife tried to cover him up and how he disgraced himself eventually.

You have a good woman here. Why didn't you ask her to be MR and MRS rather than your name. No sane person will do this.. male or female. Go back and apologise to that woman. Yes, the arguments and fights will be there. You would want respect but remember she is human. If she wouldn't lock you out of her house or tell you to leave, why should you do same. Go back and tell her sorry.

kmcutez:


Assuming you die today, your same family with poverty mentality will start dragging the property with your wife.

Hahahahaha. Dope, doper, dopest.

Zirah:


Whoever you are, you're an ingrate and a fool. Last last this pride that isn't making you reason well will finish you soon. You got yourself an intelligent and resourceful woman who made money for you both yet aren't grateful. Your wife is a good woman, you should be thankful.

You did business. Shared the profit. You used yours to build a house. She used hers to build a house. You gave yours for your parents to live in. She gave hers for her husband and children to live in. There's equity. What's your problem then?

May I ask? In whose name did you build the house you gave your father? Your wife's? Hypocrite!

You nailed it. Women dey suffer.

ExtraExtra:
Women are the backbone of the family, they make or mar the home, since they help bring life to the world suffice it to say they sum up what we call family, 99% of successful, longlasting home or family is the ability of the woman to hold the "forte".

Op, bring your ass here, you have important questions to answer. I intend to call you out on your hypocrisy.

In whose name did you build the house your father lives in?

ExtraExtra.

Acidosis:


The marriage was built on a faulty foundation: The idea of my money, your money, I will spend my money on this, you will spend your own on that . weakened the marriage. No love relationship can function on that platform. It is a mere partnership, and partnerships are bound to break someday.

For some selfish reasons (not love), a lot of couples have embraced this system. This is not entirely bad as far as OP and his spouse share the same ideology about marriage and properties.

As far as marriage is concerned in my own school of thought, all receipts must be in the name Mr. & Mrs (except those gotten before marriage). It doesn't matter who bought them or who paid the children's school fees, it doesn't matter whether you married a sit at home wife or a career woman.

If my wife decides to embrace some selfish interests or make plans for my demise, then she's merely wasting her time. In my lineage, only my grandfather died "prematurely" at age 96. The house he left behind is currently wasting away cos grandmom at age 95+ don't need it anymore. All she does now is sleep and eat. The only way a selfishly acquired property would meet the intended purpose is when a spouse die prematurely (- now this is the message we preach).

@OP, whether in her name or not, if you both see yourselves together in year 2070, there wouldn't be a fight in the first place. However to avoid issues of any form, buy everything in the name - Mr & Mrs and save your marriage.

I prefer reading posts on Nairaland than commenting here and there. But I can't resist the deep wisdom in your post. Marriages these days are viewed more like business partnership,
not as it actual purpose - an unbreakable union and oneness between a man and a woman - which the Creator of the Universe Himself initiated. In a true marriage, nothing like ''yours or mine'', but ours. Thus all properties acquired in marriage should bear Mr and Mrs, no matter who owns it. In a true marriage, no third party - their parents, extended family members, friends, relatives and religious parties etc - should all maintain their lanes.

But unfortunately, the two people involved in this issue have same view on marriage.

The wife was somehow wrong by using only her name, without the husband's consent. She talked to him rudely, which he said was unusual, because she thought he was cheating on her. As if insulting him was not enough, she went far to insult his family, which made him angry. Who would stand having his parents being verbally abused by his own wife? He admitted it never happened before


Op, both of you should forgive each other and continue as one. Try and find a way to reconcile with your wife. It's your marriage, not Nairalanders marriage. All is well

sassysure:
I'm super happy that our women are getting smarter day by day.
They must have learnt a lot from most of our mothers mistakes. Some mothers will tell their female daughters not to make the mistakes they made and to fight for their rights.

I read a lot of hidden meaning in that woman's story but didn't want to dwell on them as we didn't hear from the said husband.

It's only the wife that can describe her husband well. She already knew and envisage what will happen and that made her did what she did.

Yet she married him
See how stupid she is

Cos a day like this will eventually come.
She didn't want to expose her husband more than saying he is a proud man. At a point she said he is a good man.
A competent lawyer will see that this woman want to salvage her marriage and loves her husband except that he has issue with pride and pride and anger are mutually related.

She should leave na and see how easy it is to marry man without pride

If that woman should open her mouth and tell us what caused that said quarrel we will be shocked.

The man has opened it while she was seeking sentiment

A married man that doesn't have regard for his wife and children's welfare, is that one a man?

A man that has no regard for his parents is a ritual killer in waiting

Mr husband, let me ask u, I'm sure u have a car, in whose name did u buy the car? Did u add her name in it?

Who bought her car
Whose name is it in

I will not condemn u but I will advise u.
Ur children are looking up to u 2 as their role models and the things they witnessed at young age makes or Mar them.

The woman making careless accusations and conniving behind her husband back is not a role model abi

Some of the doctrines our parents passed down to us may look normal but they are not healthy and it was because they don't know.

Doctrines that have stood for millenni
Ordinary Half century of feminism and the world in disarray

Also our children will try to change some of the teachings we passed down to them.

The world has evolved much and if u don't evolve with it, u will be left behind.

42% divorce rate is not evolution
It is catastrophe

Sorry my religious brothers and sisters but the holy books dont define happy marriage anymore cos it cage the woman and most women arent happy. When u raise some issues up, instead of the man to look for solutions, he will want to massage his ego by quoting those famous lines from the holy books added with the archaic training received while growing up.
Had u been doing the right thing, this woman would have carried u along.

It's no longer the man's world. Women allowed it to be for peace to reign and mostly because of the kids but they shouldnt always be cowed into submission because of that cos they are humans too.

Did the Bible say you our marry these men
Why not get sperm donor and see how you will end up

Swallow ur pride and make your kids proud by going back to their mama and apologise. ,

No Child can be proud of a man that apologise to woman that insult his parents

Also apologise to us kids. Yes, no matter how small u think they are, they know what is going on.
U want the best from ur wife, treat her like a mistress and queen and she will worship the ground u walk on.

Which wan hasn't he done
Yet she treats him like he's dog
Thunder fire her

How u handles anger when it comes is what makes u a man.
Ur wife can learn from u.
We all are imperfect and should be giving that chance for redemption.

Ur wife suggested joint ownership.
Let it go for now and seek her out, on her own, she will insist on doing that and will even tell u the reason she did it in the first place.
Divorce is not healthy nor separation especially to the kids. U might go and marry another but are U sure it won't be worst than the first?

Then she will also be
disciplinedWe have options
You do not

And the fight among children.
Once u have kids involved, u learn how to be selfless cos they deserve the best from u both.

why
So they can abandon us like you want him to abandon his parents

Respect55:

Dnt get ur self worked up young lady, u might end up going deeper into depression zone. 2hat else could have made her do what she did if not that.
One more thing, whenever u want to throw up, take two cups of water and close ur eyes for 30mins.u will b fine.
I WON'T REPLY U AGAIN

You really need to get a life..like seriously you have quoted practically every single female,bemoaning what only you can explain..

I chose to ignore you initially when you quoted me with your crap..but your endless wailing here is funny if it wasnt so pathetic.

freshvine:


The best investment in life should be her husband other possession is immaterial. she'll die and leave properties behind but her imprint in this life is the husband she raised souls with.

its apparent her marriage is with a cluse. she never believe in marriage and committment.

get out of my house is a phrase commonly used in marriage relationships some women are even daring to lock their husbands out of homes if they misbehave.

in western countries, the man is thrown out regardless.

I think you're suffering from cognitive dissonance, because the person who actually abandoned his marriage and kids and moved to a different state is that person you're defending.

the rest of your post is complete garbage. 'Get out of my house is a commonly used phrase in Nigeria mainly because the husband's viewpoints are actually widely shared by Nigerian men.

it's almost as if you don't know that the phrase 'get of my house' is very often followed by the wife or woman actually being bundled out.

Nobody is that naive to believe that a Nigerian man ordered his wife out of the house in jest, in a country where wives generally have very few rights anyway.

I can see you're female. I hope you never find yourself in a similar situation before the stupidity of your current argument finally dawns on you....

Vicyace:
After reading the husband's part of the story, I could sense pride, dishonesty and no transparency on the part o f both parties.

Mr husband, no one should take sides. You are both wrong and the problem didn't start recently. It started the day you used your part of the money to cater for your parents(justified though) but not carefully thrashing it out with her. She must have felt ambushed and arm twisted by your decision which you likely carried out MANLY of course.

For her to be suspicious of your dealings means something was actually wrong and all you had to do was give her some reassurance. You telling her to pack out just sent shit right to the ceiling.

Bros. You need to rebuild that home. Would you like to have your children grow up in a broken home and exhibit a worse display of character when they are grown ups?

Her family will never support her.( no sane parents would) they want their daughter to remain married so they will oonly castigate her and beg you to reason beyond anger.

See this as a collective fault and tackle it as the head of the house.

Carefully sort this out and live your life away from social media.

She's your wife. You guys allowed the dark spot to grow so big because you fuelled with lack of love and c communication.


Bros do well by talking to your wife and settling thius matter like adults and partners. Don't make her feel she's inferior to you because she's a lady.

You wanna take kids away from her? You both own them. The moment you do that, you create a bad platform for your kiuds and they will suffer most not your wife.

Think smarter and better bros.
Put anger under your foot where it should be
Throw pride into the sewage. It should be there forever
Rise up and filled your home with sweet smelling love and watch her apologise and behave like the lady you married.

if it were her parents that fell sick nko

transformed:
Oga you guys problem is just ego clashes that maturity should sort out...you guys are just two spoiled brat, your wife want to stick with her affluence advantage, while you want to show her that you have arrived. Families with protracted illness, years of infertility, poverty etc. are living in peace but you guys have it all and want to throw it into garbage. Take the lead, heal your home this is just a phase. A real leader must be willing to serve and take a lot of shit...The house you two want to separate on top will be in want of occupants soon as those kids find there bearings. It is going to be just two of you and a lot of empty, stuffy rooms. A devil you know is better than an unknown angel...bottled grievances can be released and forgiven.

angel is angel devil is devil stop saying wrong thing

MizMyColi:


Sassysure, your head dey there.

Some of us women na correct hot plate o.

But the partner makes all the difference cos over time you realize that gra gra is unnecessary given how maturedly your partner handles your crazy moments.

So you will just by yourself advise yourself to be cooler in your approach to things.

why hot plate marry gragra

Daisythof:
You are a thief.
A very big one for that matter.
So you want her to change the name on the property to your name only after you used your share to take care of your family.

Thank God she refused. So if the house had been in your name, you would have chased her out?
Hahahaha she saw through you and did the right thing to protect her future.

If you like, move out. Las las, she will rent out the property and still make money.
You are the loser in all this.

your mates have husband. You have money and unhappy life

Respect55:

Go get 'senseline', it doesn't cost much.

Obviously, the people that own you are living in great regrets right now.
They have done the world a great disservice

What I deduced from the couple's writeups, the husband is full of greed and ego. If he can adjust, the woman seems to be a good hearted woman, then she will dance to her husband's tune. Everything that's happening now is been dictated by the husband. It's not good to be greedy, selfish and proud at the same time.

CioAngels:
He can take your option 2 if he must take any option at all, which i think is better for them Taking transfer and taking your children with you and if she wants she can come to where you are. What makes you think your children will go with you? If you love your children so much, then you should know you will destabilise them over their education, health and other trauma that will associate with it no matter how little they may be. Going away from home is a childish idea. Madam, apologise to your husband and let peace trust rein in your home again for the sake of the untainted love you have for him.

eyinjuege:


Obviously, the people that own you are living in great regrets right now.
They have done the world a great disservice

I'm a role model to u.

Some people are hammering on the agreement between them.
What kind of agreement is that?
For them to have split the money, it's obvious the wife wanted her own share for her own use, and rightly so.
Otherwise she wouldn't have even been concerned about any of the money at all.
For him to slyly make her agree to use her own share of the money (which we all agree was her own share) for their family, and not spend it on her own parents, go on a luxurious vacation, or buy a new car shows that he wants to eat his cake and have it.
For her not to have been in support of that possibly coerced "agreement" is obvious in the next step she took, by not including his name in the property. She never felt it was right, and obviously didn't agree to it.
Why should it be a problem for him to live in his wife's house, when she hasn't ever told him to leave it or ridiculed him for that? He was the one who tried to ridicule her instead.
I'm really not getting why it should be a problem for her to spend her own share of the money on a property with her name on it. It's her hard work for goodness sake.
Why bother to claim we shared the money, and still expect your name on what she decides to do with it? That was an unfair position to put anyone in, by making such an agreement.
Where is the place of honor and integrity in all these?

I have a feeling that dude named 'MIKOLOWISKA' is the same UP. Else, he won't be up in arms attacking everyone whose opinion negates his.

Thank you Zirah for adding another twist to this plot. So, the house the mofo built for his parents is in whose name? Theirs or his? The answer to that question alone will mail his coffin.


To be honest, even I too can't build a house in my father's name when I have none yet. God forbid, if he dies, my siblings who happen to be mostly boys will just easily put me out with the 'You're a woman tag'. Like the yorubas often say; 'Oko o kin je ti Baba t'omo ko ma la'la'. Meaning a farm yard doesn't belong to both the father and child without a boundary.


That guy is simply a thief, crook, rogue and an egotistic fraudster. If he's not, let him settle with his wife and move into the apartment without demanding for a name change. If not for what he has up his sleeve, what has the name on a document (ordinary paper) got to do with marriage? Is the woman collecting tent from him? Is she bringing in other man to the house? Abegi! Most Naija Men are narcist!

PrecisionFx:


I know ur a conehead Afonja from the word go because I had been here long enough to witness Yorubas use Google translate to claim Igbo, A very stupid idea that belittles the Afonja.
We will catch u each time u use Google translate to translate Igbo language because the result is always obviously distorted to the extent that it looks like "Yoruba igbo" .

"" But i cn bet my balls dat u're nt frm Enugu ""

LMFAO, Afonja now claiming to be an online Anthropologist that studies the igbos, U sound too silly.

""Atleast u understood wat i said ""

U used Google translate and it ur translated Igbo looks very stupid and gives u away as a Cone. Simple. .

Seriously, i never knew google translates igbo becos i neva use am b4.

Lemme tel u wat u dnt knw,....

I ws born in Enugu, ogbete to be precise.

I also lived in amawbia, Eke mkt sq rd...Anambra state

I stayed in obinze near Futo in owerri...Imo state

I stayed in Obingwa....Abia State

I stayed in obele....Rivers state

I stayed in bonny....Rivers state.

One tin abt al dese places i mentioned is; dey speak igbo language.

So, wen u said i used Google, i smiled becos i dnt reason lyk a local igbo man lyk u. U knw quite sure dat; no mata hw educated n exposed a typical Igbo may become. 2 things dnt let go of dem

1. Their accent (e.g. Lice, Galli, rove, lepent, blother)

2. Der local way of doing tins.

.......I am frm d south south my blother & very ploud n happy am nt a FLATINOROSKI developer.

God bless you. Why would husbands be treating wives as if women are not human being who don't have feelings (emotions)

Caris77:


My humble submission.

1) marriages pass thru phases and the phase you and your wife is determines the future of the marriage. Pls talk things out with ur wife.

2)probably you acted like most men does when it comes to marriage, which is ; "i can spend money more on my family than yours ". Am not disputing the fact that ur half went on ur dad 's medication but be honest if it were hers would you had allowed her to use her half for her parents medication. You probably would have told her to give some certain amt. And if this were the case , she must have queried herself on what the future holds and did what she did .

3)that she used her name dosent mean she stopped loving you but its for future security should incase what you did or said by asking her to leave ur house comes up.

4)oga , women are moved by what they hear and you stopped telling her how much you appreciate her effort ,started having harmless friends like you said . Some whom you sometimes compliment and of cos she felt threatened of her position and ur Love. So stop all you did or do which made her to question your integrity .

5) you sound like one who doesnt apologise when he is wrong but maybe buys gifts to makeup, and she wil forgive and you wil still do same thing again. Oga things like this can make even the softest, most forgiving woman to harbour resentments ,and the day she will explode, you will marvel at the depth of bitterness from her mouth and i guess this is why you where shocked she insulted you and family members together .
You really pushed her by telling her to leave the house and her full bitterness came up. Show ur wife love and make her fill important again.

6)finally quarel brings out the worst in ppl ,so you showed her what she feared most by telling her to leave ur house and belives putting ur family ,s need most is the reason she did what she did. Pks you guys should make up, dont allow urself think you cant beg her .if this marriage is important to you then put pride aside , call your wife and thrash things out . Let her unburden her years accumulated resentment out and make her know that there is no other her if you claim you dont have another .

Ogwula mu na onu.

MIKOLOWISKA:
yeah
Real men just sit there and endure suspicion and venom till they snap and commit murder. Dumbasss

Well sluggards would rather prefer to live in denial and adhere to stupid rantings of insecure, misogynist, men with over bloated egos. A real man would obtain valid proof of his wives adulterous affairs and not acting on childish impulses. I have seen women who have the worst tongues on the planet, who literally spit fire but you would not believe how gentle and submissive they are when their husbands who are real men are around, because real men treat their women right. Its only an insecure fool that would drag properties with his wife and sees her as a competition because he comes from a poor background and she's well off. And after slaving for the family all she gets in return is to be thrown out empty handed while the alofrate runs around town with scores of women, Unfortunately for him the plan backfired.This is what happens when women get married to little boys who think they can now keep a family after sighting the first strand of pubic hair. But you wouldn't know that would you?

TonyeBarcanista:

Lol I rather stay happily unmarried than in a marriage with someone with the mindset of OP's wife.

The OPs wife apologized and has compromised. She accepted to make it joint but he wants it to himself only! If he can't accept her deal, he shd go and fk himself. May God bless him with a slay queen so that he will appreciate the gem his wife truly is

He doesnt want the house anymore...deal with that

GrammarCheck:


The OPs wife apologized and has compromised. She accepted to make it joint but he wants it to himself only! If he can't accept her deal, he shd go and fk himself. May God bless him with a slay queen so that he will appreciate the gem his wife truly is

Nihilstjnr:


I think you're suffering from cognitive dissonance, because the person who actually abandoned his marriage and kids and moved to a different state is that person you're defending.

the rest of your post is complete garbage. 'Get out of my house is a commonly used phrase in Nigeria mainly because the husband's viewpoints are actually widely shared by Nigerian men.

it's almost as if you don't know that the phrase 'get of my house' is very often followed by the wife or woman actually being bundled out.



I can see you're female. I hope you never find yourself in a similar situation before the stupidity of your current argument finally dawns on you....

i wanted to have a healthy conversation but with the insult you've been hauling its likehood your emotional dysfunctional status have override common sense.i'll excuse your ignorance and juvenile deliquence until a later date its appropriate to interface on a logical periscope. good day!

EgunMogaji:
OP, I really don't care about what two grown up do emotionally and romantically. If you no gree anymore then divorce each other.

However what you suggested to her as in putting the property only in your name is fraud.

Madam, please don't let him browbeat you into doing that.

It makes no sense.

+1000

God forbid, if the man kicks the bucket pematurely, next thing you see some family members laying claim to the house.

You asked her to leave and of course your didn't mean it really!!!?? And u want us to believe u. Nah guy, she tried to paint u a saint and that's her undoing, cos u didn't waste time in painting her as the devil. And of course some bigoted people won't see the underlying in your words.
I believe her not cos am female but cos she tried to respect you in her post.
Now you think u can take the kids and leave, and she can tag along if she wants to. Next you will tell us how bad a mother she is!!!!
Op you better go home and settle issues with your with your wife. Enough of these blames. You guys have kids, she should transfer the property to their names, yes all the kids names should appear on it. Go and build your home, your woman wanted to find ways to mend your home, even in her response that's what she asked for. Yours is for separation and blame game. Living alone doesn't pay when u have a spouse you could have sort things out with. Go home to your family and stop that transfer. Work things out

ExtraExtra:
Women are the backbone of the family, they make or mar the home, since they help bring life to the world suffice it to say they sum up what we call family, 99% of successful, longlasting home or family is the ability of the woman to hold the "forte".

My attention was drawn to this forum and this topic https://www.nairaland.com/4617351/husbands-pride-wants-ruin-home#69371294 and it is sad that most people drew conclusion on a one sided story though i wouldnt blame those involved because they judged based on what was said and the individual involved needed public validation for her wrong doing, a public display i dont approve of but since external persons and relations are already involved i'd like to clear some details.

"Dee" comes from a very well to do family while i dont so when we got married, i made her feel we are in this together, not one above the other but as partners in EVERYTHING. To be fair to her she brought up the business idea we did years ago, in other to put forth money to start up, i made sure i had equal money as her for it, goal was to own a property, build et al. Unfortunately my dad's ailing health deteriorated to the extent that he had to be flown out, when the profit came, i told her and she agreed, she decided we split it into two so she use hers for the initial plan. As the first born i went with my dad, back here she got the property and started building, when i came back the remaining money with me was used to complete it, what was left was used for my parents house. Being a trust worthy person i feel she is, i didnt bother to check documents cos i felt she would do the right thing by putting both our names which she kept in a bank.

Now, i work and own other businesses so i'm always in contact with alot of people from both genders so to her she feels i may have lost guard by cheating which is not true: i dont have password on my phones, i always make and receive calls right in front of her but she still think i'm hiding something and that was the genesis of the problem weeks ago, i rebuked her to cut it out immediately but she was out for blood, she insulted me like never before, when i didnt give her face, she extended her TOXIC words to my parents, my family, my background and my personality, that was when i lost it, if not for my cousin that was there i would have hit her, out of anger i told her to get the hell out of the house which of course i didnt mean, then she shocked me saying the house is ONLY in her name, i was numb and speechless, in other for me not to react in a brutal way i left the house, told her i would never step there again if she doesnt change it to my name ONLY. My cousin who was there when it happened told my people, they called me so i had to explain things, right now her family knows what happened and none is supporting her.

YES i said she should put my name only cos she belittled and betrayed me which tells me if it was in both our names she will raise shoulder and feel above me.YES i requested for transfer and i will go through with it, i cannot be away from my kids and still be in the same state, it doesnt make, when it is sucessful, i will get a place conducive amd comfortable for my kids, they will be with me. I told her recently not to bother with the name change anymore, she can have the house all to herself for all i care.

I wont divorce her because i dont believe in that, once i move with the kids she can come along if she wants but right now we are seperated. I wanted a partner, she displayed stupidity not smartness, what the future holds i dont know, she made her bed she should lay on it.

Op pls if she begs you do forgive as i wouldnt want your kids go through what i'hv been through from my kid days till now. my parent finally own their separate house but my life am trying hard to make better cus i see no one to talk to, lost my front tooth in primary school days both parent didnt know untill 6months, i gat things am good at which only my friends can say am good, No one to tell wat i have in mind, my academics shortcome, health and so on, my dad was the closest to me but lost him 2012 then the rest nah story. if she wants to change the name stating both names(yours and hers) pls do cus the house to me belongs to your children and children children, you both can always build a separate house if ego dey ona body.

Exactly. But I'm not the one assuming here. You are. You should read comments properly before quoting someone.

PrecisionFx:



It's very silly n senseless to assume an apology as weakness.

MIKOLOWISKA:
your mates have husband. You have money and unhappy life

What is wrong with you, are you an emperroor that one can't have a divergent view from yours. You keep attacking everyone who doesn't applaud the man.
The business was even the woman's idea, and am sure most of the 65% money came from her irrespective of what the op said. She started the house, and he just added what he had left from the travel which means 75% funds did come from her, yet she's willingly to compromise, and all she's asking for is how to make her proud man understand and accept joint ownership. Yet you see her as the villain.
Please enough of your tantrums, go and get busy!!!!!

MIKOLOWISKA:
So progress is being accused of infidelity without proof and humility is allowing a shrew to insult your parents. Even zidan didn't take such nonsense at World Cup final

hr should have given her proof and put her heart to rest