Good job.Resistance is the key.u did well by shouting help help help.lolz.

d greatest writer,i salute u..more Ink 2 ur pen

kingcornel:
d greatest writer,i salute u..more Ink 2 ur pen

u mean am?

toluxad:
u mean am?

yes

Tbm, my dearest Tbm, my lofely tbm, my cutest tbm, fanxs for d dedication. I so much love it whenever you do dat. Its like when you.......my center of gravity. I lof you dear. Keep it up.

Tbm, my dearest Tbm, my lofely tbm, my cutest tbm, fanxs for d dedication. I so much love it whenever you do dat. Its like when you.......my G.-spot. I lof you dear. Keep it up.

story is taking too long


visit www.donsimonii.com for other interesting stories.

This is definitely the longest episode on Countless. It has more than 19,000words. I did it to make up for the prolong absence of update. Thanks alot for your understanding.

By the way, the medical facts stated therein this update are purely from the imagination of your amateur writer. Abeg no crucify me for any wrongness you see. Thank you.



143. COUNTLESS.



>>BACK TO PRESENT<<


The memories of every pain I'd suffered right from when I started having those suicidal thoughts, up to the very moment I gained admission into Dreamland started surffing through my mind the instance I finished remembering the ugly incidents of the past 13hours.

Silently, a tear drop escaped from my eyes while I was staring at the white ceiling of the ward. The realisation of the fact that I'd earlier decided to end my own life because of everything I've been through was enough to make me start sobbing quietly on the bed.

'ah, God, please...this pain is too much.... I can't take it no more!....' I cried out mentally in absolute pain as the memories continue to replay in my mind.

To remind me of her presence in the room, Dr Busari, - (the same doctor I'd called to bear me witness two days ago at my wedding, when Chioma had caused trouble for me) - dragged a chair and settled down beside my bed.

"you have no idea how shocked I was when I saw you standing in front of my car." She said. "God forbids, what would have happened if I had not seen you on time? What could have happened? I just can't imagine it..." She paused when she noticed that I was still crying profusely.

"hmmm...." She sighed briefly and checked the hanged drip on the pole. She stood up and removed the niddle connecting the drip to my hand. She then pulled the blanket over my exposed konji and returned to her seat.

"Mr Darous...." She called softly. Her soft voice caught my attention and I turned my head towards her in anticipation of what she wanted to say.

"Mr Darous, whats going on with you?..." She questioned with a confused look and concerned demeanor. "what could be so devastating for you to have prompted you to arrive at taking your own life? Am yet to understand...."

"do..ctor...." I cut in, still with teary eyes and plaintive voice. "you don't...you don't know how I've suffered in the past few days..."

"hmmmm...." She sighed. "while you were still unconscious, I did some tests on you and all I could confirm was that you are really and gravely stressed....whats going on with you? This man lying on the bed is not you, honestly. This thing in front of me is nothing but a dilapitated version of the happy man that graced the premises of this hospital some months ago....whats happening to you? What happened to that man that brought Florence, a victim of a hit and run driver to this clinic? What happened to that man that payed all treatment expenses of Florence? A girl he met due to circumstances? What happened to that man that use to say 'helping people is like reaching an orgasm for him? Do you even consider what would actually happen to those that depended on you? What happened to that MAN!" She said with emphasis on the last word.

"that man....was a liar and a cheat..." I told her with a silent tone.

"I don't know the gravity of what happened to you, and seriously, I don't care about that. All I know is you are very selfish in your decision...yes, selfish! This world would be damn if it looses someone like you! I mean...I mean......am......" She battled for what to say for more than three times before I decided to end her frustration.

"Doctor please, am hungry...."

She stared at me blankly and it was then that I saw the tears that was warming up in her eyes.
"I will talk to you later about this...." She stood up and walked to the other side of the bed. She carried my left hand up and began to untie my hand. She checked the bandage wrapped accross my rib and sighed satisfactorily.

"you promise you will be fine?" She asked with a squeezed look after returning to her earlier position.

"yes doc...." I replied weakly.

"okay...." She proceeded to untie my right hand. I manage to sit upright when she finished. Even though the pain I felt from my rib and elbow tried stopping me from doing so but I didn't allow it.

I wrapped the blanket across my waist.
"can I get down to ease myself?" I asked her as she was just staring at me.
She nodded affirmatively and helped me to get down from the bed.

She led me to the entrance of the restroom inside the ward.

"I can ease by myself doctor..." I told her when I saw that she was preparing to follow me into the toilet.

"I know, I just want to make sure you don't do anything stewpid to harm yourself inside that place. " She pointed inside the toilet.

"here?" I queried and took a quick peep inside the toilet.

"yes..."

"only dettol is inside here na? And its inside a plastic container...."

"and who told you that drinking it is not enough to harm you?" She squinted again.

"and who told you I'm going to drink it?" I countered.

"are you not peeing again?" She asked with a feigned frown.

"not with you standing close..." I said and used my hand to cover my d!ck region.

"ah...see you..." She smiled sheepishly. "do you know how many times, I've bathed and touched that tiny thing in the past ten hours?"

"seriously?"

"do I look like am serious to you?"
"hmmm...." With that, I ignored the funny look on her face and went inside to discharge my liquid loads.

"what would you like to eat?" Dr Busari asked me after I'd returned to sitting on the bed. She stood at akimbo before me.

"can I get garri and groundnut with cold water?"

She maintained an askance gaze at my face after I'd said that. "out of all the nourishing foods in the world, na garri you vote for?"

"why not? If its the only food that can artikulate well with my weakened body...."

"hmmm....okay. Lets get it for you. But, no cold water....its not good for your health, atleast not now..." She explained.

"okay. Moti gbo...(I've heard you.)

She turned around and started walking towards the exit, but she suddenly stopped and turned around. "ehn, ehn lest I forget, I'll arrange a psychoanalyst for you very soon...." She informed from the doorway.

"a psychoanalyst?" I asked with a frown.

"yes...." She answered.

"What for?" I queried frankly.

"you'll know soon.... What do you say?"

I contemplated on whether to question her further but decided to drop it. "okay..." I told her and rested my back against the wall of the ward.

Dr Busari left the ward and returned 8mins later with another nurse - named Abosede - who was bearing the requested garri and groundnut inside a medium size tray in her hands.

_


Two weeks had passed now since I regained my consciousness inside the V.I.P ward of the No Money-No Treatment hospital.

Due to all the sufferings I'd suffered in the hands of women in the past, it was kind of hard for me to believe at first that Dr Busari had no hidden agenda for all the supports and free treatments her and her group of sychopant nurses has been giving me.

I was being treated and handled like a kid.
They were always at my beck and call. Safe for the occasional cries in the day and wailings at midnight - everything was slowly getting back to normal for me. All thanks to Dr Busari, who claimed I was only reaping from the seed of kindness I'd planted in their Hospital through my donation.

Although, on my request, she also promised or better put, swore to me that she will make sure my presence in the hospital remains descreet. Hence reducing the number of nurses attending to my ward to just three instead of the initial six.

***

During the thursday of the second week of my stay in the hospital, promptly at 10a.m the following day, Doctor Busari came inside the ward to announce to me, the arrival of the psychoanalyst she had arranged for me.

She was off-duty on this said day, therefore she was claded in a skirt and blouse ankara attire that exposed every curve on her slender and 56years old body. She wore her hair in plaits and safe for the heavy red lipstick on her lips, she was close to perfection.

I on the other hand was plainly clad in a white overall cloth. I was having a solo fun with the small guitar Dr Busari gave me during the first week when she entered the ward and told me the psychoanalyst had arrived.

I stopped what I was doing instantly and followed her out of the ward.

Two minutes later, I was sitting inside a medium size office and ultimately in front of an office desk that separates the sitting position of a young and beautiful lady that Doctor Busari informed was the psychoanalyst.

"I'll leave you two alone while I attend to other things.... I hope you both have a fruitful session." Doctor Busari stated with an ebullient smile and walked out while the lady in front of me followed her out with a smiling gaze.

A moment of silence followed the departure of Doctor Busari until the therapist decided its time to begin.

During that moment of silence, I seized the opportunity to access properly the appearance of the lady in front of me.

She's chocolate in complexion, probably between the ages of 26 to 29, she can't be more than 5ft tall when standing. I assume.

She's relatively well composed and heavily endowed in the frontal region of her chest.

She was claded in a blue sleeveless dress that was covered at the top by a black jacket that perfectly accentuate her modesty.

She must have noticed that I've been studying her all the while seeing as she opted to coughing gently to get my attention.

"Good morning...." Her voice sounded so cool and accomodating.

"morning...." I replied sharply.

"hmmm....care to tell me why you withdraw the Good from the Morning?" She asked nicely.

"excuse me?"

"I mean, I greeted you with a polite gesture of Good Morning...."

"yes...."

"but you replied with something I percieved as a direct contrast....care to tell me why you did that?" She rested her elbows on the desk and stuffed her jaw inside the comfortness of her palms.

"I..don't know....am...am not just in the mood to be cheerful this morning."

She withdrew her jaw from the palms and readjusted her elbows to a 'L' position on the table.
"okay thanks for your honesty. I think that will help us a lot." She expressed. Every word she said was always accompanied by a smile.

"now, lets get started. Am Adedoyin Sarah, and I'll be your therapist from now till when you don't need me anymore..."

"but what makes you think I need you at all?" I interrupted her quickly. "Tell me what gave you the idea that you are in anyway better than the antidepressants they have been feeding me here since last two weeks?"

Therapist Sarah was caught offguard by my effontery at first but she was able to recover quickly. She interlocked her fingers and gave me another sultry smile before she started talking softly.

"hmmm....I think am starting to like this our session... Thanks for saying your mind out. I really like your style...."

"will you stop beating around the bush and tell me why this whole thing is not a waste of time?" I lamented frustatingly.

"you sound as if you are in a hurry..." With a narrow look at my face, she asked.

"yes, my guitar is all alone inside my room and its waiting for me...am also missing it already!" I slammed hard at her.

However, instead of getting angry, this young therapist just adjusted her posture again to where she can look directly into my frowned eyes and released a grin.

I reclined back on the chair and fold my hands across my chest.

She began to talk afterwards while I maintain my cool and listen on. "To answer your question on why this meeting is better than the drugs you've been taking, well, here is my answer..." I scoffed at that but she continued nonetheless. "In a world in which pharmaceutical companies bombard consumers with adverts for drugs that treat everything ranging from anxiety to ADHD, it's easy to regard a pill as the be-all and end-all to life's difficulties. Meanwhile research on the effectiveness of the most commonly prescribed medications shows that, truly these drugs can alleviate the symptoms in people with severe depression, even ones far worse than whatever you yourself might have been through.... However, this fact didn't stop Dr. Peter Kramer from claiming recently in a highly controversial New York Times article that antidepressants are good for almost all of what ails us mentally, even if we're psychologically normal or perhaps a bit neurotic.
What you might not know is that these drugs are not effective for moderate or mild depression symptoms. Do you want to know what's worse? Eh?"

"yes..." I nodded affirmatively as her words had started to interest me.

"Their side effects and interactions with other medications can make someone's psychological symptoms worse and cause serious health problems. As if this weren't bad enough, the majority of drugs intended to treat psychological disorders are not prescribed by mental health experts, but by physicians who in 15 minutes or less dispense therapy in a bottle without trying to address the patient's thoughts or feelings. The type of which am trying to establish with you here."

"you sure?" I chipped in.
She nodded affirmatively and continued.

"Moreover, the cost of these medications is adding to our whopping health care costs which themselves are tied in with the deficit, the debt ceiling problems, and escalating insurance premiums."

"but who told you that money is my problem in this case?"

"no one, and I never meant that...but for the sake of clarity, am trying to give you the imperative reasons why seeking the help of competent therapist to conquer the dark periods of our lives is far better than opting for antidepressants."

"hmmm, okay...go on..." I nodded.

"thank you... Now for example, in 2010, according to an IMS report, antidepressants were the second highest class of medications prescribed by physicians in Nigeria. Recording an estimated number of 93.6 million prescriptions. The annual total price tag was 11.6 billion U.S. dollars, which was 4% of all spending on prescription medications.
However, am telling you objectively that, psychotherapy is cheaper and more effective than medications for many of the problems that lead people to seek treatment. And again, estimates of psychotherapy's effectiveness, based on hundreds of empirical studies, are that it works approximately 75-80% of the time. And to me, that's a pretty impressive figure."

"really?"

"yes...yes...and believe it or not, psychotherapy is cheaper than prescription medications particularly when you consider its impact on your ability to achieve your long-term life goals....."

"and how do you know that I've got goals?"

"you're quite funny...well, everyone has got one or two goals to pursue in life. The only difference is when and how we approach it....literally speaking..."

"hmmm....thats really really cool...well nice meeting you..." I said with an extended hand placed on the table for a handshake.

She smiled and reciprocated my gesture.

"bingo! The pleasure is mine. But you haven't told me your name yet..." She chipped in after the handshake.

"Darous Emmanuel." I answered instantly.

"wow!.... What a beautiful name... Is that your real name? I mean is that the name you were given at birth?"

143 Countless cONTD...



"nope. My real name is Oluwadamilare."

"really?"

"yeap..."

"awnn..cute names just for you alone...."

"you can say that again..." I smiled.

"i'm happy that you are smiling..." She teased.

"you make it sound as if its a strange thing on my face...." I countered back and the teasing look on her face was quickly replaced with a serious one.

"no, no, not atall...its just that it always makes me feel happier whenever I see smile on the faces of people that has suffered in the hands of this complicated world....you know life is but a pendullum oscillating between fear and hope. When it swings to fear, things that make you happy disappears quickly, likewise when it shifts to hope. Apparently, the smile that just appeared on your face are plain confirmation of a brighter days ahead. Which I strongly see you approaching very soon..."

"you can't be sure of that...."

"trust me...." She stated with a convincing tone.

I released a deeper sigh and settled my gaze back on her face. She gave me this look that makes me feel like pouring my heart and mind all out on her. Although I've doubts that she will possibly hate me once she hears my whole story, but an inside voice was telling me to give it a try.
I coughed gently to prepare myself for what am about to say.

"gesundheit..." She said to wish me well.

"maybe sessions like this have worked on others but the more I look at it, the less I see any brighter future for myself."

"hmmm....but what makes you say that?" She asked softly.

"you see, as I am, am a total failure. I've ruined my own life and future with the things I've done in the past....things I've done, if you hear of it, am afraid you will never want to be seen with someone like me ever again...."

"oh, comon? Why don't you try me...bring it on, you know a problem shared is a problem solved...."

"you sure?"

"I've never been more sure about anything..."

"hmmm....alright. I'll tell you. But one thing you should know is there is no amount of blame you want to give me that I have not tell myself already...."

"I promise, am not going to blame you..." She stated with a convincing smile.

I dragged my seat closer to the table separating us and begin to talk in low but audible tones while she gave me the best attention I've ever received in days. "here is the story of my life......"

__

So it took me more than 1hour to complete the most saddest human experience known to mankind. I started from my meeting with Beatrice through Jide, my relationship with Adedoyin, how I married her, my involvement in her death, how I allowed Chioma to entice me into doing a lot of awful things and so on. The betrayals, unexpected events and dangerous situations were also not left out in my narration. Therapist Sarah, along the line of my narrative, held my palms softly in her hands and was frequently giving me a passionate nod that makes it more easier to open up to her.

"so, how did you arrive at the conclusion to end your own life?" She asked with a concerned tone. I looked at her and started shaking my head. Obviously, her question have opened up the memories of Joke, Doris, Nike and Chris's part that I've been trying to bury deep inside my mind.

I squeez my eyes hard as the memories of the bad things I've did to Joke and her family started pouring in. I tried hard, I tried my best to stop the tears, but they seem to be too strong for my willpower to hold. I started sobbing in that instance. To my suprise, therapist Sarah left her seat and came to me. She gave me a bend-down side hug while I was still sitting down.

"shhh..its okay..just let it out, let it out. Your pain is the breaking point of the shell that encloses your understanding. It is the bitter potion that which the physician within you heals your quickself...dear, just trust the physician and drink its remedy in silence and tranquility. Believe me ,you will be fine..." She ministered those comforting words to me while I continue to sob quietly in her hug.

Eventually, the sobbing subsided all thanks to the pillow comfort that her massive brest was giving my head and cheeks. Gawd forgive me for this.

Instead of returning to her seat, after using the back of her palms to wipe off my tears, she decided to sit on the desk so she was more closer to me.

Everything she did was enough to strenghten me to start talking again. So I explained to her about how I got to start living with Joke, Doris her Mum and Nike. The incident that happened the night Doris sugarcoated me into agreeing to start having sex with her all in the aim of having a male child.

Make I no delay you with every details of all what I told her up till the very day of my wedding and the suicide attempts that followed thereafter.

By the time I looked up to Sarah's face after I'd completed my story, what I saw was an emotion trigger. Her beautiful eyes was indeed an awful one to behold. Heavy tears were roling down her cheeks while the ones still in her eyes were waiting to be born officially.
As you already know from time, seeing tears in the face of a woman has always been my own kryptonite. This tears on Sarah's face are special tears. They didn't get there of their own volition, rather they were there simply because the owner of the eyes they occupied was too moved by the story of my life.

I had no choice than to feel pity for myself and for this woman before me.

That was the reason why I rose up suddenly and gave her a warm embrace which she welcomed with open arms. We started weeping nonsense to eachother's shoulder henceforth.

We stayed like that for more than twenty minutes before our emotional battery shut down. She was the first to withdraw from the embrace. She stretched her hands towards her black handbag and brought out a roll of tissues. She mopped her face first before doing the same to mine. I feel loved again!

"its been long since I felt that way for anyone...." She said after we've both returned to our respective seats. "but your story....hmmm....its quite touching....by the way, how's your wound?"

I placed my right hand below my ribcage where the bandage covering my wound was located in attempt to feel if its still hurting. "I think its getting better. Thanks..."

"nice to hear that..." She paused briefly to check the dial on her wristwatch. "its already past two, I think....." She was still saying when a knock landed on the door.
"come in..." Sarah answered the knocker and seconds later, Dr Busari walked in.

"am I interrupting anything?" Dr Busari exchange glances with both of us. Perhaps she said that after seeing the way our eyes were watery.

I returned my gaze at Sarah expecting her to reply the 50 old woman.

"no....we are just rounding off." Therapist Sarah replied her as she started picking her things and getting up at the same time.

"okay....I take it your time together was sucessful then..." Dr Busari asked again with a questioning brow at Therapist Sarah.

"infact, it was the most sucessful I ever had with any of my clients before now...." Sarah expressed with a satisfactory smile and walked towards me.
"we continue tomorrow, okay?" She asked and I nodded affirmatively. She then exchange pleasantries with Doctor Busari before proceeding out of the door. The latter followed her out while leaving me alone in the office for up to five minutes before she returned.

"lets get you back to your ward, so you can eat before taking your drugs...." Dr Busari informed.

I rose up instantly and followed her out to my private ward.

_

I'd just finished eating and taking my drugs. So I was left alone with my guitar to play in the ward. While playing on the guitar, I remembered my session with Therapist Sarah. It was quite a fruitful one. How everything went emotionally for both of us. I remembered her smiles vividly. Those pleasant smiles that dominated that alluring beautiful face of hers. Her grins also I remember very well. But most importantly, what I will never forget in a lifetime was the tears in her eyes. She shed them on my behalf. The tears caused by my narration. Those tears are special. Yes they are!

I touched my right shoulder where all her tears have landed while we were locked in weeping embrace, hoping to still find it wet but unfortunately, the stewpid ceiling fan inside the ward has done its job. It has dried it without my consent..

I rose up from the bed and headed quickly to the toilet. I got there and stood in front of the wall mirror. I smiled at it and the reflection I got was a slowly rejuvenating Darous. A confirmation that further bolsters the claim of Sarah that Psychotherapy is better than antedepressants with her analysis. I returned to my bed and smiled again at myself.

Odd isn't it? The people that has destroyed me in the past, that has ruined me with overdose of affection and attention were all women but here I was, in a place where its the same sex group that is giving me a glimpse of the beauty of what life can offer. That thought alone is enough to make me smile again.

Apparently, I'm also smiling because I knew I would see her face again. Its only a matter of 24hours.


T.B.C

Ftc.

Soo lucky to jam this update now.

BTW, This update makes me to ask myself, can someone who claimed to have never attended the four wall of a university come up with something sooo mesmerizing as this? Geez! This is brainstorming. Pure talent at work here. No doubt. The sky is your starting point.

nice one,,I gonna gv u accodale 4 dat

Nice one bro.
The story is captiviting,

Gwad Of Thunder

shango will be your muscle.

is quite d best i’ve read since starting dis story dis epistle is heartwarming thanks once more waiting for more updates soon don’t keep us waiting too long.. respect mahn

Wow, so lovely.. I'm happy for Darous, life has given him a second chance.

Kesscy:
is quite d best i’ve read since starting dis story dis epistle is heartwarming thanks once more waiting for more updates soon don’t keep us waiting too long.. respect mahn

Thanks bro, but I'll try my best boss

ChizzyMaris:
Wow, so lovely.. I'm happy for Darous, life has given him a second chance.

Really? So this calls for celebration abi?

donaldphilipizu:
nice one,,I gonna gv u accodale 4 dat

Lols.. I look forward to that ooo..

Icebreeze:
Nice one bro.
The story is captiviting, shango will be your muscle.

Shango wey don dey fork up.....we no get light since the past five months and shango never strike nepa office... That deity is overrated jare

pFolar:
Ftc.

Soo lucky to jam this update now.

BTW, This update makes me to ask myself, can someone who claimed to have never attended the four wall of a university come up with something sooo mesmerizing as this? Geez! This is brainstorming. Pure talent at work here. No doubt. The sky is your starting point.

Hmmmmmmmmmmm, am just lucky to have people like you here. You av no idea of what impacts your comments always have on me. Thanks

TheBlessedMAN:
Really? So this calls for celebration abi?

Yes o

Keep it up sir. God is ur strenght

One thing i like about you..is your time to time inclusion of comedy in your all sweet story....which one is body-strial? Copied from industrial shea....you deserve a knock on the head

This is well constructed epistle
I can't believe this myself that once upon a time a mate in tear hero's reader is entertaining us like this
The setting, choice of words, adjectives used in description, choice of place of events etc all well blended
3 gbosas for you Darous...I am proud of you
Sweet popcorn for you dear

TheBlessedMAN:
Shango wey don dey fork up.....we no get light since the past five months and shango never strike nepa office... That deity is overrated jare

Smiles...
It seems shango is now merciful.

Adesina12:
This is well constructed epistle
I can't believe this myself that once upon a time a mate in tear hero's reader is entertaining us like this
The setting, choice of words, adjectives used in description, choice of place of events etc all well blended
3 gbosas for you Darous...I am proud of you
Sweet popcorn for you dear

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, boss, thank you sha ooo. Na u be the fuel wey dey power my private jet with your comments ooo

Wheezdohm:
One thing i like about you..is your time to time inclusion of comedy in your all sweet story....which one is body-strial? Copied from industrial shea....you deserve a knock on the head

Lols....but i thought knocks are meant purely for doors, which one be my head again?

Great, nice work TBM

In one word, GENIUS...Absolute Genius. Did i say one word? Goddamn it one word is never enough in describing your ability Mr Tbm.

three bgoza for my oga

I just atikulated the whole story...... More thunder ⚡ to you bro

Almost cried for Darous in this episode. Tbm, cntinue please