₦airaland Forum

U dey tell me now make i come warn or beat am 4 u or what? Next.........

bianconerriii:
Dear All,

I have been dating this girl for over a year and everything was wonderful until I moved into my own place about 6 months ago from where I was squatting.

I started noticing some things. Most times she is at my place, she turns her phone face down, chats on WhatsApp only when I’m not so close to her and on two occasions I caught her deleting text messages. Confronted her about it and she said it’s was nothing, she was trying to manage space, mind you she uses a 64G ‘iPhone 7’.

On this lovely weekend, she comes over to my place and a call came through, she hesitated to answer until I insisted. I asked who the guy was and she said he was just a friend calling to check up on her and he was married. My suspicion grew.

The following day I went through her text message with this same guy only to find out they have been seeing each other for a while even going to hotel together.

The sad part is we have planed formal introduction in about 3 months. I can honestly swear by my life, I have never cheated on her before. At this point I am in a delimma, what do I do? I have considered breaking up and moving on. What do you advise?

Many thanks.

I almost didn't wan to reply but after seeing some immature replies I think I should reply you.
First of all, if she is actually dating a married man, then she is so wrong on every level. Then again, who is perfect? I myself do not condone cheating for anything but hey! Everybody is different and to some extent has a level of wrongs he/she can condone. Besides, who said there is a manual for relationship?
I noticed you said you were squatting somewhere before you moved yo your own apartment. I want to believe that you were having some problems with finance and as such, you were not helping her with some finance. A man must not carry all the responsibilities of his woman but to some extent, you should be able to help. Seeing that you were/are still lacking in that department, some things has got to give. I am a woman, a hard working woman at that but to be honest, every woman needs some sort of financial assistant especially from her man. It might not necessarily be for materialistic things, I for one isn't a fan of those but one has responsibilities especially if you are the first child and have lots of siblings looking up to you. Again, that is not an excuse to cheat...
Someone once said that if all married men should be faithful then most single ladies will have to starve. That is unfortunately, the sad reality. Please notice the word "most", this doesn't apply to all single ladies though...


From the truth, you can make your decisions as it fits you.

bianconerriii:
Dear All,

I have been dating this girl for over a year and everything was wonderful until I moved into my own place about 6 months ago from where I was squatting.

I started noticing some things. Most times she is at my place, she turns her phone face down, chats on WhatsApp only when I’m not so close to her and on two occasions I caught her deleting text messages. Confronted her about it and she said it’s was nothing, she was trying to manage space, mind you she uses a 64G ‘iPhone 7’.

On this lovely weekend, she comes over to my place and a call came through, she hesitated to answer until I insisted. I asked who the guy was and she said he was just a friend calling to check up on her and he was married. My suspicion grew.

The following day I went through her text message with this same guy only to find out they have been seeing each other for a while even going to hotel together.

The sad part is we have planed formal introduction in about 3 months. I can honestly swear by my life, I have never cheated on her before. At this point I am in a delimma, what do I do? I have considered breaking up and moving on. What do you advise?

Many thanks.

Forget her bro, don't monitor her, she will delete every evidence. Catch her red handed and cancel the introduction.
You 're about getting married and you are cheating with a married man who will fall back to his wife if everything goes sour perhaps for material gain.

rame18:
What league again?

justice league

lexy2014:
does d lady in question play in afghanistan league?

uefa champions league bro

AHCB:
funny how you always pin this on the man.

I guess polygamy = man.

Quality20:
u can still keep ur cool, she isn't gonna jilt u, since d men are already married. Maybe she is trying her fantasy out of sleeping with an old married man who can give as much as 500k or more for just a nyt. who knows, d men might even bankroll ur wedding

How can a human being have this thought?�����

Like your mother right?

Rextizzle:
I always say this, most of this Naija girls are worthless and whóres, they are never satisfied, they are like Oliver twist, just dump the bitch and move on.


Or you can go for a foreign girl and have rest of mind, good luck.

Just forget that girl. No need to rush into a marriage that you already have doubts about.

Don't confront her just keeping fuuccking with no plans until she gets tired of u!

You are lucky my brother God has saved you from disgrace !!


You better run for your life !

Black men with black hearts. Useless cretins.

DaddyNimo:
dude just keep forking that biitch and delay her till she's 29 and get a new babe of 22 to marry... why u stressing yourself over a cheat?

ShedLuc:
I would advice you end the relationship and search for
someone that'd love and respect you. That girl doesn't have any respect for you, neither does she loves you

No one can serve two masters at same time; if she does loves you, she should keep you and you alone.

Thank God you were able to discover that on time.Nonetheless, If you really don't wanna lose her
irregardless of her misdemeanors so to speak, sit her down and discuss it with her. Try to resolve it and see where the problem lies......it may be you ain't taking good care of her generally......

Why must he take care of her
This is the nonsense u all tell dem DAT makes dem entitled

Slikbae:
Like your mother right?

No. like your mother bitch!

Chai. Sometimes, this thing makes me scared of relationships. The thought of someone you intend to give your all to doubling up on you, can make trusting a herculean task. You start fearing that the next person could turn out like that. No thanks to all those who have succeeded in messing up our minds and psyche.

CookieLaVee:
I almost didn't wan to reply but after seeing some immature replies I think I should reply you.
First of all, if she is actually dating a married man, then she is so wrong on every level. Then again, who is perfect? I myself do not condone cheating for anything but hey! Everybody is different and to some extent has a level of wrongs he/she can condone. Besides, who said there is a manual for relationship?
I noticed you said you were squatting somewhere before you moved yo your own apartment. I want to believe that you were having some problems with finance and as such, you were not helping her with some finance. A man must not carry all the responsibilities of his woman but to some extent, you should be able to help. Seeing that you were/are still lacking in that department, some things has got to give. I am a woman, a hard working woman at that but to be honest, every woman needs some sort of financial assistant especially from her man. It might not necessarily be for materialistic things, I for one isn't a fan of those but one has responsibilities especially if you are the first child and have lots of siblings looking up to you. Again, that is not an excuse to cheat...
Someone once said that if all married men should be faithful then most single ladies will have to starve. That is unfortunately, the sad reality. Please notice the word "most", this doesn't apply to all single ladies though...

Again, during my service year, I was opportune to meet a big politician who gave me my first #100k at his office after telling me he found me interesting. I knew he could have wanted to go to the next level with me if I wanted but alas, my future is too valuable to play into the hands of these diabolical politicians. I ran home with the money and never looked back. Even though there wasnt any need to share this with my bf, I told him out of trust and joy of getting some big money I never worked for or imagined to get at that time, but until after two years, I didn't know he never believed me. He told everybody that cared to know that I slept with a politician and he gave me money....
What am I driving at? Where there is love, there must be trust. If you do love her, trust her to tell you what is actually going on. Don't just deduce your conclusion from what you aren't sure about. I heard you say she has been going to hotels with the married man, confront her and trust her to tell you the real truth. I know the world has stereotyped most women as whores and what not but you you have to find out the real truth.
From the truth, you can make your decisions as it fits you.

Bias advise coming from a lady, he has moved to his new apartment why is she still seeing him. What is bad is bad, there is no how you want to paint/play around it. He's about to go see her parents wouldn't that be a enough reason to cut ties.

So, if they finally get married and there are some financial constraint she should fall back on cheating (just because she didn't sleep with him doesn't justify her action).

If she needed the cash she would have told her bf and connive to spend his money but some guys aren't open to it.

Tizu:
How are you sure she has not infected you with stds and HIV? She is a harlot and a vector. God truly loves you that's the reason for this revelation, other men didn't have this opportunity and are finished today. You will regret if you continue. But go for a medical test.

most married people that indulge in this extra Marital affairs have all these stds especially HIV... he better go and do test o

that's how they all are...holes...

This is all I've been saying.

pocohantas:
Men are polygamous in nature, most adulterous men do so with ladies, not men. So, what is surprising here?

My problem now is that, you will become an alpha-male (aka anti-feminist/fear women crew) and start spitting venom all around NL. Women stop hurting men biko, we have enough angry men on our hands.

dingbang:
justice league

.

CookieLaVee:
I almost didn't wan to reply but after seeing some immature replies I think I should reply you.
First of all, if she is actually dating a married man, then she is so wrong on every level. Then again, who is perfect? I myself do not condone cheating for anything but hey! Everybody is different and to some extent has a level of wrongs he/she can condone. Besides, who said there is a manual for relationship?
I noticed you said you were squatting somewhere before you moved yo your own apartment. I want to believe that you were having some problems with finance and as such, you were not helping her with some finance. A man must not carry all the responsibilities of his woman but to some extent, you should be able to help. Seeing that you were/are still lacking in that department, some things has got to give. I am a woman, a hard working woman at that but to be honest, every woman needs some sort of financial assistant especially from her man. It might not necessarily be for materialistic things, I for one isn't a fan of those but one has responsibilities especially if you are the first child and have lots of siblings looking up to you. Again, that is not an excuse to cheat...
Someone once said that if all married men should be faithful then most single ladies will have to starve. That is unfortunately, the sad reality. Please notice the word "most", this doesn't apply to all single ladies though...

Again, during my service year, I was opportune to meet a big politician who gave me my first #100k at his office after telling me he found me interesting. I knew he could have wanted to go to the next level with me if I wanted but alas, my future is too valuable to play into the hands of these diabolical politicians. I ran home with the money and never looked back. Even though there wasnt any need to share this with my bf, I told him out of trust and joy of getting some big money I never worked for or imagined to get at that time, but until after two years, I didn't know he never believed me. He told everybody that cared to know that I slept with a politician and he gave me money....
What am I driving at? Where there is love, there must be trust. If you do love her, trust her to tell you what is actually going on. Don't just deduce your conclusion from what you aren't sure about. I heard you say she has been going to hotels with the married man, confront her and trust her to tell you the real truth. I know the world has stereotyped most women as whores and what not but you have to find out the real truth.
From the truth, you can make your decisions as it fits you.

100k cos you're a Nigerian? wow that's a touching story.

ceejay80s:
that's how they all are...holes...

holes? zero chill.

dollyjoy:
Must you comment?

That is his view and it depends. Let him air it sir.

bianconerriii:
Dear All,

... I can honestly swear by my life, I have never cheated on her before.

The above is not valid enough to castigate her. Have you not been unfaithful and cheating on God by committing formication with her ALONE?
You are in the same business together, its only that you're unduly pained more than your Creator.

zicoraads:
Really?!

No going all mad about how ladies are scum and whatnot? I can only imagine what you would have typed if this was the other way.

the thing is, it’s quite obvious what the man should do. I don’t agree with the lady’s actions at all

BiggyB242:
Bias advise coming from a lady, he has moved to his new apartment why is she still seeing him. What is bad is bad, there is no how you want to paint/play around it. He's about to go see her parents wouldn't that be a enough reason to cut ties.

So, if they finally get married and there are some financial constraint she should fall back on cheating (just because she didn't sleep with him doesn't justify her action).

If she needed the cash she would have told her bf and connive to spend his money but some guys aren't open to it.

Void of insults, very good.
Well, I simply told the poster to follow his mind, I am not imposing decisions on him like most people are doing here. It is his life and he is an adult, at the end, it is his decision to make after finding out the real truth. I will not condone a cheating partner and I don't think I will carry on with my plans after finding out the truth, but my principles and beliefs may not be same with another person, hence my advice of him taking decisions that he best sees fit.

One question, if I was a man, would you have seen my advice as bias? I don't claim to know it all but I have seen a lot in this life to know that life isn't black and white... Thank you

What does she do? How does she make her personal ends meet? Are you the one sponsoring or somepersons somewhere? Stop dating liabilities, they end up as liabilities forever. Note: I am not saying it is wrong to support or your partner solicits support elsewhere. What I am saying is study your partner very well. Anyone comfortable with gifts from anyone, who can’t say No to some things, don’t have clear goals and you can’t set goals with are a red flag. Move one dude. It’s gonna be problem for you forever. You will keep dealing with issues as this as you two won’t agree on anything.

bianconerriii:
Dear All,

... I can honestly swear by my life, I have never cheated on her before.

The above is not valid enough to castigate her. Have you not been unfaithful and cheating on God by committing formication with her ALONE?
You are in the same business together, its only that you're unduly pained more than your Creator.

CookieLaVee:
I almost didn't wan to reply but after seeing some immature replies I think I should reply you.
First of all, if she is actually dating a married man, then she is so wrong on every level. Then again, who is perfect? I myself do not condone cheating for anything but hey! Everybody is different and to some extent has a level of wrongs he/she can condone. Besides, who said there is a manual for relationship?
I noticed you said you were squatting somewhere before you moved yo your own apartment. I want to believe that you were having some problems with finance and as such, you were not helping her with some finance. A man must not carry all the responsibilities of his woman but to some extent, you should be able to help. Seeing that you were/are still lacking in that department, some things has got to give. I am a woman, a hard working woman at that but to be honest, every woman needs some sort of financial assistant especially from her man. It might not necessarily be for materialistic things, I for one isn't a fan of those but one has responsibilities especially if you are the first child and have lots of siblings looking up to you. Again, that is not an excuse to cheat...
Someone once said that if all married men should be faithful then most single ladies will have to starve. That is unfortunately, the sad reality. Please notice the word "most", this doesn't apply to all single ladies though...

Again, during my service year, I was opportune to meet a big politician who gave me my first #100k at his office after telling me he found me interesting. I knew he could have wanted to go to the next level with me if I wanted but alas, my future is too valuable to play into the hands of these diabolical politicians. I ran home with the money and never looked back. Even though there wasnt any need to share this with my bf, I told him out of trust and joy of getting some big money I never worked for or imagined to get at that time, but until after two years, I didn't know he never believed me. He told everybody that cared to know that I slept with a politician and he gave me money....
What am I driving at? Where there is love, there must be trust. If you do love her, trust her to tell you what is actually going on. Don't just deduce your conclusion from what you aren't sure about. I heard you say she has been going to hotels with the married man, confront her and trust her to tell you the real truth. I know the world has stereotyped most women as whores and what not but you have to find out the real truth.
From the truth, you can make your decisions as it fits you.

So sorry as a female I beg to differ...did you hear him mention the type of phone she uses? That doesn't look like someone that needs money for much more pressing issues but a GLUTTON that isn't satisfied..

I keep saying this, why date a guy that you feel or know you cant be content with his financial status? I must say this, most ladies are very vain with misplaced priorities here and there. Most of us demand for things from our boyfriends same things our parents haven't and couldn't provided for us. Neither can we provide for ourselves.. Isn't that absurd?

Be good in bed bro, train your waist.

CookieLaVee:
I almost didn't wan to reply but after seeing some immature replies I think I should reply you.
First of all, if she is actually dating a married man, then she is so wrong on every level. Then again, who is perfect? I myself do not condone cheating for anything but hey! Everybody is different and to some extent has a level of wrongs he/she can condone. Besides, who said there is a manual for relationship?
I noticed you said you were squatting somewhere before you moved yo your own apartment. I want to believe that you were having some problems with finance and as such, you were not helping her with some finance. A man must not carry all the responsibilities of his woman but to some extent, you should be able to help. Seeing that you were/are still lacking in that department, some things has got to give. I am a woman, a hard working woman at that but to be honest, every woman needs some sort of financial assistant especially from her man. It might not necessarily be for materialistic things, I for one isn't a fan of those but one has responsibilities especially if you are the first child and have lots of siblings looking up to you. Again, that is not an excuse to cheat...
Someone once said that if all married men should be faithful then most single ladies will have to starve. That is unfortunately, the sad reality. Please notice the word "most", this doesn't apply to all single ladies though...

Again, during my service year, I was opportune to meet a big politician who gave me my first #100k at his office after telling me he found me interesting. I knew he could have wanted to go to the next level with me if I wanted but alas, my future is too valuable to play into the hands of these diabolical politicians. I ran home with the money and never looked back. Even though there wasnt any need to share this with my bf, I told him out of trust and joy of getting some big money I never worked for or imagined to get at that time, but until after two years, I didn't know he never believed me. He told everybody that cared to know that I slept with a politician and he gave me money....
What am I driving at? Where there is love, there must be trust. If you do love her, trust her to tell you what is actually going on. Don't just deduce your conclusion from what you aren't sure about. I heard you say she has been going to hotels with the married man, confront her and trust her to tell you the real truth. I know the world has stereotyped most women as whores and what not but you have to find out the real truth.
From the truth, you can make your decisions as it fits you.

does she have to collect from her man? How about her father, brothers and sisters? Does she have to date a married man since the guy can’t help meet her needs? How about she leaving the guy and finding a guy who is financially better? Why make a guy miserable when you know you can’t love him truthfully and completely. If you are looking for someone to meet your financial needs, date someone you know can. Why date a guy you know cannot and then cheat on the person? Is this not wickedness? I disagree with your line of thought. True love doesn’t compromise.

ok, lets fry lemon