QuitNotice:
Both your mum and your grammar are at fault. This is about the worst post I've ever read on this platform

0ubenji:
to ask this question after reading the story, your brain definitely dey leak oil.

Ardar:


Because their shops are close to each other making them neighbors.

Ardar:


Really? what mistakes did I make?

QuitNotice:
Sorry I was so harsh, but you need to pay more attention to English. A couple of novels would be great

oluwaahmed post=7456[b:
8083]Was it ur mum that creampied her[/b]? If no, den ur mum is not to blame

thorpido:
Not exactly your mom's fault but if you bring a girl from the village to stay with you,you should have spent time educating and counselling her.
The moment you notice anyhow waka,you put her on the next night bus.

Boys for city tear eye and 'bush meat' dey quick fall.

The milk is spilt and there is little you can do now.Your mom has to take part of the blame.When someone is staying with you,you are responsible for that person's care and guide.

QuitNotice:
Sorry I am so harsh, but you need to pay more attention to English. A couple of novels would be great.

Talking about your mum, you only take people in when you have the time to groom them. She didn't pay much attention to the girl's activities. Women know women even after a mere glance. Your mum didn't put in enough effort to check mate that girl

Ardar:


The lady never showed any signs of been wayward, she was always so humble and respectful. My mom never thought she was like that, I guess she was good at pretending.

EbukaHades10:
Mummy Ebuka wey no dey collect nonsense.

The one that stayed with us was sent back to the village when she begin dey show signs of waywardness.

In Mummy Ebuka's words,"if u want to be wayward,go and be wayward where ur parents can see u"

Abortions:
i don't like the kind of English u speak this days. Which one be KEEP CONTINUE

Ardar:
Hi everyone,

I have a very serious family problem, my parents decided to take a female relative of ours from our home town to come live with us in Port Harcourt, due to the fact that she couldn't continue with her education and had to learn a skill.

This lady was enrolled in one of these computer centers to at least be a computer literate since non of my family members had the time to teach her and she wanted to learn.


she is not at fault



26 years not bad.. Where it will be bad is if the girl does not know who impregnated her.. And also if the guy concerned will not denh the pregnancy.. The man responsible accepts the pregnancy, fix introduction for her and let her start life with the guy.... Instead of the blame issue from the mum...

Every morning she goes on an errand for my mom before moving along to learn in the computer center, not knowing she was dating and sleeping with a guy.

My mom never thought she would ever behave in such a stupid way, I mean coming to an unknown place for the first time and already dating a guy within a short period was something my mom never expected.

She got pregnant a month before Christmas, she told no one and waited till we all travelled back home to tell her mother. All of a sudden we started hearing rumors of how the girl we brought back home got pregnant and my mom was to blame for it.

This girls mother took out the all the blame on my mom and not her daughter, this woman said that my mother neglected her daughter to fall prey to men in the city but took care of me because am her own child, till today my mom and the ladies mother are not speaking to each other.

For Christs sake this lady is 26 years old and 4 years away from clocking 30, am younger than the lady and due to my introvert nature i tend to stay indoors and out of trouble not even because of my mom, if I wanted to become wild i would have, a long time ago.

So pls is my mom truly at fault here?

sinaj:
Did your mum arrange any man or drugged her into sleeping with any man?

If no, then your mum is not to be blamed.

QuitNotice:
She might be good in pretending, but I think your mum's experience should beat her in that. For example, a lady that is involved with a man is not in total control of her time, and can easily be found out whenever she uses more time than she should have. There are other traceable elements whose signal your mum should have picked. She simply didn't pay enough attention

Ishilove:

She was sent to school and there is no way they can monitor her from home to school and back. Her guardians felt she was going to school, not going to collect deek.

From the narrative, she was able to conceal her wayward lifestyle perfectly while still collecting the deek. This shows planning. It also shows that the lady knew exactly what she was doing.

I still reiterate that the 26 year old woman and her mother are idiots, the mother especially. She is blaming someone else for the actions of her wayward and irresponsible daughter. A daughter that is of marriageable age o. Mscheeew

Op's mother is too nice. Lord knows you can't try this with my mum.

Organs:




I disagree with you, "Ishilove".

"Thorpido" You are on Point. @Ardar, there are some details you left out. Now, why was she in a Computer school and not a conventional University, Polytechnic, etc? like, maybe you are in or attended? Also, you mentioned she ran errands for your mum and later goes to the computer school, i'd like to believe these are those low rated computer schools that people go to to get some computer education and not a realistic skill that can get you employed which goes to say she was just a househelp period. From Ishilove and Ardar's comment you will understand the average Nigerian mentality and the "help" they profess. Now, does this lady want to learn computer skills? most probably No, cos she never got to choose! Was Ardar's mum asking her questions about her progress, her concerns, relationships, dreams, ambitions etc, most probably, NO! Now does this lady have the privileges that Ardar enjoys? of course not, because she is from the village naa, and she is being helped and has to do as they say period. Now, does she feel different, ofcourse Yes, she is away from home remember, is she getting love and care from all the people around her? Now, if a man should come around professing Love, care and giving her attention, tell me why she will not be vulnerable. In most Nigerian middle class homes, the poor relation, househelp, driver, etc are just tolerated. In worst cases they are the witches and wizards, even eating the same food as oga and madam is a privilege to be grateful for. You guys should go and watch "Blind Side" and understand why we are just different from Oyinbos. A white family took in a black kid. One of the first questions the woman asked the kid was if he liked being called "Big Mike" because that was what they all called him, guess what, he does not like it at all. Now, tell me which Nigeria mother will even ask if you like the general Ekaete name? person wey we dey help......Also, watch "The Butler" and see how JFK, a President will sit down with a slave servant to understand his concerns and what is going on in his mind. @Ardar, i'll say, thank you for asking, I will say to you, this is majorly a failure from your mum, however, its not her fault. She truly does not know how. We need to change our attitude and mindset. I was lucky, (i considered it unlucky then, cos all my friends used to laugh at me and make fun of I and my siblings) in my mums house, everything was by seniority. Househelps, relations used to discipline us and order us around. It was best, however, it affected the relationship between my sister and my mum cos she accused my mum of disliking, even hating her and putting relations and househelps before her. Now, though, she knows better and it helped curb some of her excesses.

Ishilove:

And I disagree with your disagreement. Are we forgetting here that this lady is an adult who should know better?? She is responsible for her poor choices, nobody else. Did Ardar's mother tell her to go deek hunting? Did Ardar's mother tell her not to comport herself? Do you need education to have common sense? Was she a virgin when she began dating who got her pregnant?

Please, stop passing the buck here. The lady is 4 years away from 30, not a naive teenager. She is solely for her predicament.

andyanders:


Exactly on point. SHe is an adult and should be held liable for her action.Nobody can force a dig into her without her consent at 26.

Ardar:
Hi everyone,

I have a very serious family problem, my parents decided to take a female relative of ours from our home town to come live with us in Port Harcourt, due to the fact that she couldn't continue with her education and had to learn a skill.

This lady was enrolled in one of these computer centers to at least be a computer literate since non of my family members had the time to teach her and she wanted to learn.

Every morning she goes on an errand for my mom before moving along to learn in the computer center, not knowing she was dating and sleeping with a guy.

My mom never thought she would ever behave in such a stupid way, I mean coming to an unknown place for the first time and already dating a guy within a short period was something my mom never expected.

She got pregnant a month before Christmas, she told no one and waited till we all travelled back home to tell her mother. All of a sudden we started hearing rumors of how the girl we brought back home got pregnant and my mom was to blame for it.

This girls mother took out the all the blame on my mom and not her daughter, this woman said that my mother neglected her daughter to fall prey to men in the city but took care of me because am her own child, till today my mom and the ladies mother are not speaking to each other.

For Christs sake this lady is 26 years old and 4 years away from clocking 30, am younger than the lady and due to my introvert nature i tend to stay indoors and out of trouble not even because of my mom, if I wanted to become wild i would have, a long time ago.

So pls is my mom truly at fault here?

Organs:




I disagree with you, "Ishilove".

"Thorpido" You are on Point. @Ardar, there are some details you left out. Now, why was she in a Computer school and not a conventional University, Polytechnic, etc? like, maybe you are in or attended? Also, you mentioned she ran errands for your mum and later goes to the computer school, i'd like to believe these are those low rated computer schools that people go to to get some computer education and not a realistic skill that can get you employed which goes to say she was just a househelp period. From Ishilove and Ardar's comment you will understand the average Nigerian mentality and the "help" they profess. Now, does this lady want to learn computer skills? most probably No, cos she never got to choose! Was Ardar's mum asking her questions about her progress, her concerns, relationships, dreams, ambitions etc, most probably, NO! Now does this lady have the privileges that Ardar enjoys? of course not, because she is from the village naa, and she is being helped and has to do as they say period. Now, does she feel different, ofcourse Yes, she is away from home remember, is she getting love and care from all the people around her? Now, if a man should come around professing Love, care and giving her attention, tell me why she will not be vulnerable. In most Nigerian middle class homes, the poor relation, househelp, driver, etc are just tolerated. In worst cases they are the witches and wizards, even eating the same food as oga and madam is a privilege to be grateful for. You guys should go and watch "Blind Side" and understand why we are just different from Oyinbos. A white family took in a black kid. One of the first questions the woman asked the kid was if he liked being called "Big Mike" because that was what they all called him, guess what, he does not like it at all. Now, tell me which Nigeria mother will even ask if you like the general Ekaete name? person wey we dey help......Also, watch "The Butler" and see how JFK, a President will sit down with a slave servant to understand his concerns and what is going on in his mind. @Ardar, i'll say, thank you for asking, I will say to you, this is majorly a failure from your mum, however, its not her fault. She truly does not know how. We need to change our attitude and mindset. I was lucky, (i considered it unlucky then, cos all my friends used to laugh at me and make fun of I and my siblings) in my mums house, everything was by seniority. Househelps, relations used to discipline us and order us around. It was best, however, it affected the relationship between my sister and my mum cos she accused my mum of disliking, even hating her and putting relations and househelps before her. Now, though, she knows better and it helped curb some of her excesses.

Organs:




I disagree with you, "Ishilove".

"Thorpido" You are on Point. @Ardar, there are some details you left out. Now, why was she in a Computer school and not a conventional University, Polytechnic, etc? like, maybe you are in or attended? Also, you mentioned she ran errands for your mum and later goes to the computer school, i'd like to believe these are those low rated computer schools that people go to to get some computer education and not a realistic skill that can get you employed which goes to say she was just a househelp period. From Ishilove and Ardar's comment you will understand the average Nigerian mentality and the "help" they profess. Now, does this lady want to learn computer skills? most probably No, cos she never got to choose! Was Ardar's mum asking her questions about her progress, her concerns, relationships, dreams, ambitions etc, most probably, NO! Now does this lady have the privileges that Ardar enjoys? of course not, because she is from the village naa, and she is being helped and has to do as they say period. Now, does she feel different, ofcourse Yes, she is away from home remember, is she getting love and care from all the people around her? Now, if a man should come around professing Love, care and giving her attention, tell me why she will not be vulnerable. In most Nigerian middle class homes, the poor relation, househelp, driver, etc are just tolerated. In worst cases they are the witches and wizards, even eating the same food as oga and madam is a privilege to be grateful for. You guys should go and watch "Blind Side" and understand why we are just different from Oyinbos. A white family took in a black kid. One of the first questions the woman asked the kid was if he liked being called "Big Mike" because that was what they all called him, guess what, he does not like it at all. Now, tell me which Nigeria mother will even ask if you like the general Ekaete name? person wey we dey help......Also, watch "The Butler" and see how JFK, a President will sit down with a slave servant to understand his concerns and what is going on in his mind. @Ardar, i'll say, thank you for asking, I will say to you, this is majorly a failure from your mum, however, its not her fault. She truly does not know how. We need to change our attitude and mindset. I was lucky, (i considered it unlucky then, cos all my friends used to laugh at me and make fun of I and my siblings) in my mums house, everything was by seniority. Househelps, relations used to discipline us and order us around. It was best, however, it affected the relationship between my sister and my mum cos she accused my mum of disliking, even hating her and putting relations and househelps before her. Now, though, she knows better and it helped curb some of her excesses.