₦airaland Forum

princfred:
Every 1hour 33minutes so i can be free to go fishing but then i rwmember 1 or 2 things she did or she will show another flash or brilliance and humble my rabid head.

UyaiIncomparabl:
No, I don't.

clive2u:
i did so much, i still do btt wetin man go do

IamPlato:
you are just confused

Delaw00:
Yeah m really pained,but wetin man go do.....all i need is a soft way to call it a quit

AmConfused:
you just told me what I needed to hear.
Lil problem is that this guy is good! like really really good. he's nice, caring, hardly ever quarrels, quick to apologize and always fight to keep me in his life.
many times I've tried to let go but he go through great lengths to get me back.

please tell me, what kinda approach should I use to break up with someone like this? it's hard u know, especially as he has done nothing to offend me

Why do you want to break up with him??

princfred:
Every 1hour 33minutes so i can be free to go fishing but then i rwmember 1 or 2 things she did or she will show another flash or brilliance and humble my rabid head.
This girl dont want to give me any plausible reason to break up and am too conscionable to break up with a girl without a good reason. I know the reasons i come up with are just plain stupid. If i quarel with her with some lame sh*t she wont quarel back. Just feeling stuck.

AmConfused:
Awwwwwwwnnnnn.. I love her already. please don't go fishing yet ehh

Jayslicky:
Been single is the best thing that can happen to a man, no worries.

Haha Bros na true

DanDeeBoss:
Why do you want to break up with him??

AmConfused:
exactly. you're very right. You just described perfectly the situation I'm in.
so now I'm supposed to let go of someone that's been completely good to me for two years for no just cause other than the way I feel. Easier said than done ☹️☹️
I actually do love and care for the guy.. just that he loves me more while sometimes I'm just indifferent.

I've tried to be honest to him, giving him reasons why we can't work. for where? every reason I give he gives another to debunk mine. he desperately wants me to stay and the way he treats me right dissolves my defences.

AmConfused:
no valid enough reason.. I just need to use the energy I put in our relationship and channel it to other areas of my life.
He consumes my every thought.. he's a distraction big-time, when we get separated by distance i die mini deaths. I don't see the rship ending in marriage.

Now tell me, ladies aren't confused like this??

@the bolded, .....I have nothing to say

AmConfused:
what exactly is your problem? from what you typed she's a good person.. or you just don't love her anymore??

AmConfused:
no valid enough reason.. I just need to use the energy I put in our relationship and channel it to other areas of my life.
He consumes my every thought.. he's a distraction big-time, when we get separated by distance i die mini deaths. I don't see the rship ending in marriage.

reservd:
Abeg stay with this guy, I dnt really know Wat else u want frm him or Mayb u shld seek professional counselling ,d issue is u I think

DanDeeBoss:
The guy is trying his best to make the relationship work, now she's thinking of breaking up with him..... And we keep hearing stuffs like "we need a good guy".....

princfred:
I know she is a good person but i had/have some uncompleted fishing/unfinished business with some fishes i think can offer more. Now she is a major consumer of physcoflirting energy to combine her and others .

AmConfused:
what has she done wrong or is doing wrong? �

reservd:
Probably nt all need a good guy afterall

True...

AmConfused:
Wakanda advice is dis sef? Ayam not understanding.
person dey date girl for nine years and you're still telling him to take it easy? take what exactly easy?

he should be unpredictable? like seriously?? so he should just keep his lover for 9years guessing his next move? 9years no be 9days o. When did he ever mention the girl was commanding him?

you can love someone absolutely and still be the "man" in the relationship. It has nothing to do with loving her too much. After loving someone for nine years without marriage and you're here telling him to reduce the love. What an advise. I weep

reservd:
Abeg stay with this guy, I dnt really know Wat else u want frm him or Mayb u shld seek professional counselling ,d issue is u I think

Delaw00:
You should know all those yeye word girls say when they are in love,things like i can't do without you,father of my unborn children,if you leave me i will die and so on,those word got me lockdown and i thought we good.i had access to her fb acct so i was just going through some of her messages days ago to get the shock of my life damn...make i nor finish the rest,nvr trust a woman in my life again.

Mcslize:
Too much love is wrong on the part of a man. Now, flash back: have you not at any time take a guy for granted just for the fact that the guy is stocking you every second, minute and hour? Have you not at any time start going for the guy that doesn't give you attention but side line the one that is confessing his love to you every minute? That's the logic.

When a guy stock a girl with so much attention, she will start misbehaving. She will get fed up and will start preferring that guy that doesn't give her attention. The best way to show a girl love is not by proclaiming it to her face. She might lose interest in that process. Humans love what they can't get easily. And that same logic works with ladies. It's not about how many years they've been dating. It is just the way ladies are wired. You don't show them too much love by constantly proclaiming it to their faces. Texting her I love you text messages and doing all kinds of things thinking those stuff will make her love you in return.

Such a guy only end up being cheated on in the end. When a guy is thinking he has the best girl in the world, she may be fantasising about another nigga that doesn't even have her time. That's the law of scarcity. When there is scarcity, demand will rise. And when there is much availability, demand will fall. Same applies to humans.

This is the same thing most guys make use of to get other girls with ease even if they are in serious relationship. A guy doesn't need to proclaim love up and down to a girl to prove his love for her. It will only make her get fed up with him and it will look boring to her. He needs to speak less rather than being all overwhelmed and intoxicated with love. Such kind of guys are easily being chested on they won't know.

AmConfused:
what exactly is your problem? from what you typed she's a good person.. or you just don't love her anymore??

AmConfused:
Eya I get.. but seriously though, she might mean her words..
you know all this harmless flirting we all do on social media? sometimes it might not mean anything.
I've never believed social media flirting and romance is enough reason to accuse one of infidelity.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Mtcheew. What stops you from doing so first?

AmConfused:
it isn't about what I want from him. it's about how I feel

princfred:
You see Op, this your reply is exactly what you need as reply. Somehow i've led you to make the reply for yourself by yourself.

AmConfused:
you people and this "pull out" of an advice ehh.. if you're in a relationship with someone you really love, it's very very hard to call it quits, however ur mind and ur head conceive the idea.

for me, calling off a relationship is hard because I can't just imagine getting to know a new person over again from afresh, getting to know their imperfections and all that, the pretence that comes with new relationship most times, etc.

the stress no be here

mrphysics:
You sound like a feminist.

You want a man that is not too defensive because you want to retain your defensiveness

AmConfused:
you just told me what I needed to hear.
Lil problem is that this guy is good! like really really good. he's nice, caring, hardly ever quarrels, quick to apologize and always fight to keep me in his life.
many times I've tried to let go but he go through great lengths to get me back.

please tell me, what kinda approach should I use to break up with someone like this? it's hard u know, especially as he has done nothing to offend me

AmConfused:
okay actually more than anything else, I want the kind of spiritual life I had before I met him.

Secondly, sometimes I get so carried away with the thoughts of him. and how good he makes me feel that I can't concentrate on nothing else.
In times like this, he consumes my every thought.

Thirdly I've been a firm believer of not been in a relationship till one's ready for marriage, which both of us obviously aren't. so what's the point of everything?

I think I should let go, somehow I know I must, but it's effing hard.. especially as the days go by