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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. (82781 Views)
I Honestly Think My Boyfriend Wants To Use Me For Ritual / I Honestly Need Your Helps. / Married Man With 7 Wives Gets 22-Year-Old Side Chick Pregnant With Twins. (2) (3) (4)
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Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by OKclothier: 7:15am On Jul 07, 2019 |
You all keep blaming the op. It takes 2 to tango remember? Why cant the lady insist on a condom as well? She also has ulterior motives. She wants it the easy way, else she will also take some precautions too. At 19/20, she isnt a minor, she is an adult, and she knows what she is doing. I'm not supporting the op, but I'm irked by the way some Nigerians reason. Everything doesn't have to end in marriage for christ sake. They both are responsible for the sh.it they are in. No one should tell the op to marry her if he doesn't want to. He also agreed to do the needful where necessary and that's fair enough. So no one should castigate him. To the op, a lot of folks will come on here to input their opinion, some will advice reasonably while several others will sprew thrash. It is left for u to sieve their comments and choose the one that is beneficial to u. U wear the shoe and knows where it pinches. Follow your heart but pls take responsibility if those kids are yours but I repeat, DONT BE FORCED TO MARRY THE LADY IF U DONT WANT TO. 3 Likes |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by lawdrigo: 7:18am On Jul 07, 2019 |
You are so full of yourself, why always condeming an innocent girl you started sleeping with at 19 of age? You deceived her,you have never loved her from your story.. Grow up and be a man, stop the social media ranting,take up your responsibilities,look beyond the present, make things right,make her the woman you dreamt of and stop abusing her loyalty. Look inward,stop the perceptive of negativity, twins are blessing from God.. 4 Likes |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Niceone50: 7:18am On Jul 07, 2019 |
daddytime:Well said 2 Likes |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Niceone50: 7:23am On Jul 07, 2019 |
sirdouglas:Rubbish, good and mature guy indeed. 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Ayoslimzy(m): 7:23am On Jul 07, 2019 |
Op if you don’t marry the girl.....it is obvious you cheated her....why should you have unprotected sex with her when you know you wouldn’t marry her A real man takes responsibility for his actions....you already take part responsibility by making her keep the pregnancy all you have to do is just takes full responsibility by marrying her By the looks of things she loves you so much 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Nobody: 7:24am On Jul 07, 2019 |
I will insult you before i advise u. You are more confused as she is. A weak man. You claim the unborn child is not yours,now becos shes expectin twins u wanna claim ur child. Deep down u know u are responsible for the preggy,its just because u were attracted to her cos she was vulnerable... a relationship started wit no resistance....now that uv had ur fill u wanna dump her... Bro, we attract what we project... u were severally havin intercourse wit no protection,you as the educated professor..what were you thinkin would happen... 3 Likes |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Larbosky(m): 7:26am On Jul 07, 2019 |
Well Staph is not necessarily a STD, he could have contacted through another means. But am still amaze how the OP doesn't thinks he his wrong, with all his story. deltateam: |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by skukimania(f): 7:30am On Jul 07, 2019 |
Joebie: Did you just say it doesn't work like that? Like you know how everything works in this world? The fact that it doesn't work for some people doesn't mean it won't work for some. This kind of thing happened to a Cousin of mine way back and my Cousin ended up loving her even though he was initially irritated by her. They are happily married now with two kids. They are comfortable and he is able to achieve his goals in life. But the wife was the exact picture of the girl this op painted. I will counter you that there is no guarantee that marrying her will not fix the problem only if the op can come a little down to earth and give this girl a trial. If he marries her, he may end up loving her. Marriage is not a bed of roses anywhere. If he marries his fairy-princess, there is still no guarantee that he won't be miserable in the marriage eventually. You see becoming a single mother of two at that age and in this kind of society is not rice and beans. There is no other excuse than to just marry her I beg! 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by intrepidjay1(m): 7:31am On Jul 07, 2019 |
sirdouglas: Reason urself bro... like if u have given her money for abortion.. Oh u r now feeling like a saviour... Bro u r wrong u r wrong.. The problem is u feel like u r saving her life when outrightly u brought her to this mess. The fact is the girl is still young.. u impregnated her and feel u r doing her good by not taking her for abortion.. OGA oooo 2 Likes |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by akejujoe(f): 7:31am On Jul 07, 2019 |
NkemChukwudi:Oga that means madness jam madness be that. What I am saying in essence is that he can't have it easy the way this guy seems to be having it. God forbid bad thing and destiny destroyers like the op for my girls. 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by janejive(f): 7:32am On Jul 07, 2019 |
No human is perfect, she will mature as time passes, marriage isnt a bed of roses. Marry her. |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by emelda86(f): 7:32am On Jul 07, 2019 |
A state u detest and don't want to marry from but u are busy wandering your d!co frolicking around their women odiegwu!!! I fear who no fear una tueh... 1 Like
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Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by RealGOAT: 7:34am On Jul 07, 2019 |
sirdouglas:If you are a man and independent, never have unprotected sex with any girl you don't want to settle down with to avoid this type of issues. 2 Likes |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Larbosky(m): 7:39am On Jul 07, 2019 |
The parent of your wife are really gentle people, if not you won't come here with all this your story. The lady in question might have her deficiencies, but so do you, infact I think you are obviously weaker, yes, I will be judgemental. And from your immature replies to people's good advice, I wonder why you shared this stories. My advice for you is to marry your wife, you called her family disorganized but I think they are friendly people, take her abroad with you and the children, develop her, I believe her deficiencies are due to the society she finds herself, she will come very good. But if you don't marry her as I suspect, I hope you won't regret. May God bless the twins. 3 Likes |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by TanyLoe(f): 7:42am On Jul 07, 2019 |
Well I can't judge you. My ex broke up with me because he said he can't marry outside his trip (IMO state). You would have told her earlier that you won't marry her and then get lots of condoms..what if after all this, your indeed the father? But it's wrong to date someone when you no you can't marry them. 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by jhydosky(m): 7:42am On Jul 07, 2019 |
Sirdouglas. I respect you and hope you find a way outta the mess. My 2 cents is simple. One of the happiness any man can experience in this life is the GENUINE LOVE of a woman. It is the true foundation for peace and progress. What you seek with social status and intelligence may not be the best for you...I think you are putting what people think over your interests. 1. What do you really want in a marriage? 2. Can she give you? If No, Is she trainable/teachable? You think you don't love her enough? Well marriage needs more than love to succeed. It's time to bring out that leader in you. Love is NOT a feeling. LOVE is what you do. LOVE is a verb, an ACTION word. sirdouglas: 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by greatbrian(m): 7:42am On Jul 07, 2019 |
Baba you bite more than you can chew.... Immortal techinque sang a song DANCE WITG THE DEVIL and i can remember the ending lyrics of it. He said WHEN THE DEVIL COMES FOR A DANCE SAY NEVER BECAUSE A DANCE WITG THE DEVIL CAN LAST FOREVER. now a lady you knew you wont marry and you continue dickmatizing what do we call that? Folly or wisdom? I have one golden rule which has help me up till now, i dont touch or go near a fruit am not ready to eat. Like a lady i cant marry i dnt copulate with. And see beyond yourself because you sound so selfish in your post. Now imagine whose kids you wanna make grow without theire dad or mum since you wont be marrying her. GET YOU PHONE DOWNLOad love isnt free by Dolly parton and see who pays for your stupid love and selfishness...... Ps, dnt do what you will that God will be crossed your carrer wont last forever neither your dreams and listen to shattered dreams by Mary smfin.... Perhapa your view abt life will change. Lastly dnt taste what u wont eat. 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Larbosky(m): 7:43am On Jul 07, 2019 |
You never see mad in laws before, pray you don't see one. She can do a whole lot of damage to the man, talking from experience NkemChukwudi: 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Newestman: 7:44am On Jul 07, 2019 |
sirdouglas: And so? If you choose the easy way and endanger her life, do you think you will be free? Do you think your own life will not be in danger too? She gave you gonnoreah, and you started thinking she got it from sleeping with another man. What of you that treated syphilis, did you get it from sleeping with another woman? You knew she's from Onitsha and that her family is disorganized, yet, you keep making love with her. Why? Here's what I can tell you... The problems of this girl are not grave matters. This is a girl that's not too demanding and who's not ready to milk your money dry. When she asks you for money to meet a need, you did as if you didn't hear her, and she will never talk about it again. What a girl. And yet, she keeps opening her laps for you. Her problem is lack of education or exposure. Because of her background, she's timid. She's not outspoken and always confide in her mother. These are not dangerous issues. Please, pick her up and brush her. Send her to school. Send her to special programs. Send her to seminars. I married my own wife when she was 21. At that time, she newly got admission to study Pharmacy. She was timid, not good with English and a mama's daughter. But, I insisted in marrying her. Of course, I never slept with her until marriage. I married her and started paying her school fees. I sent her to seminars in Lagos under Pastor Taiwo Odukoya's wife. I sent her to Daystar Leadership Academy of Pastor Sam Adeyemi. I started encouraging and motivating her to build herself up more and more considering the great future ahead of us. I encouraged her to start following certain people on Facebook and Instagram. I inspired her to have her own NGO for inspiring women and the girl child. Mind you, we married in December 2016. She's still in school. We had our first baby in October 2017. And we are expecting our 2nd child this 2019. She will finish school next year. I got her a good apartment off campus and she's living with my sister's daughter to help her. As for being a mama's daughter, I always put my feet on the ground. I made her understand that I'm now more close and important than any other person in her life. In the same way, she's number one in my life before any other person. Listen, if you see gold for the first time, you will think it's ordinary stone. But, when refined, you will see its glory and beauty. Refine that girl. Build her up. Some girls that are smart and beautiful have horrible habits that will break you and make you miserable. Grasses are not always greener at the other side. As for her family, you can show them an example of lovely and peaceful family from your own new family with their daughter. Are you going to live with all of them? Your own is to be caring for her mother and helping her siblings occasionally. You may be the saviour or the light that her family needs to see the light. Marry her. Take care of her. Come back and take her and your kids to be with you where you are. 5 Likes |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Halo22: 7:47am On Jul 07, 2019 |
If I will advise, try to have a rethink over ur initial decision of not marrying. Already, u have gotten her into the family way and that she did maybe because she loves you. I understand you may think you both are not compatible, but the fact she is in for you after telling her u won't marry her and after sharing STD together tells something is ordained somewhere. Sometimes, what we are planning for in life, is not what really comes to us afterwards. As for not loving her, it is a gradual process cos I have seen couple that were forced into marriage and as such, hated themselves for years, but after sometime, they love themselves than one could imagine. In xyz, don't abandon that girl later. Correct any error in her and remain with her. Have a blessed day. 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Bode91: 7:48am On Jul 07, 2019 |
sirdouglas: Bro, growing up I made a list of qualities my future wife must have, I didn't date some ladies because of some qualities which they didn't have. through the years I have found out that there is no perfect woman, all I got to do is to focus in the good side and help them with their inadequacy( one's I can live with). According to u, this lady loves u when others couldn't, a lady that love's u at ur lowest point is worth upgrading ( developing her). change ur mindset, focus on those qualities that made u kept the relationship in the first place. I was born out of wedlock and it messed me up. I got so much hate for my dad that even when his mum (grand ma) died I never showed up. I beg u in the name of God, pls always be there for those kids don't let them hate u like I did, 2 Likes |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by thegreencoal: 7:48am On Jul 07, 2019 |
madampresident: |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by goc176(m): 7:49am On Jul 07, 2019 |
You had this experience and you still went ahead, karma is a bitch, you simply want to ruin her life. 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Nosib(m): 7:49am On Jul 07, 2019 |
Long story short op, never mind the poo spewers who forgets that even good intentions are never enough in life, its all about delivery and getting your message across constructively. Confirm the paternity of the kids and if they are yours accept everything that comes with it, be in their lives and provide for their upkeep. Never marry out of convenience or pity, rather focus on coparenting your kids. If the Children are not yours cut your losses and move on, however for old times sake you can help her financially, all at your discretion. @sirdouglas accept that this is your destiny and you must take it head on and wholeheartedly. There is nothing new under the sun and whatever you are facing now several people have faced worse and prevailed. I pray God gives you wisdom in these times. Remember this world and everything in it will someday pass away but at the end we all give account of how we spent our lives. Cheers. |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Nobody: 7:49am On Jul 07, 2019 |
Men don't groom their wives to the women they want them to be. Totally and absolutely wrong. Rather, u help groom her to that person she want or desire to be. It's her life, not yours. You don't own her even though you put the ring on it. |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by efficiencie(m): 7:50am On Jul 07, 2019 |
I really do not understand you at all...your case is akin to someone who goes the market purchases a substandard product despite being warned that it is substandard and you used this product and it's acting up and now you intend to return the product...tell me, if you were the seller won't you sue such a buyer for being so stupid...I am sorry I sound insulting but you really degraded and disrespected yourself. Here is a girl you know does not fit your profile from the word go, you slept with her repeatedly, so repeatedly you got her pregnant and now she is pregnant with twins, she requested for an abortion (which is disapprove of) and you declined but you don't want to marry her...you want to force her into single mother hood. Have you considered the consequences of your action? Have you realized that the girl's life going forward is at stake? Have you considered the fate of the children who will be known to be born outside wedlock? Have you considered what impact this has on the next marriage you are targeting? This is the height of irresponsibility. You are a man to screw a girl but you are not man enough to live up to your responsibilities. This is why our world is so terrible. So many of us want to do whatever we like and get away with it...dude you are here because your conscience is dealing with you. Do what you must but realize that whatever you sow the same you shall reap! |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Bode91: 7:53am On Jul 07, 2019 |
happney65:Not every one can turn 100 to 1000 that is why some are entrepreneur. Since the said lady is loyal and loves him ( according to the op) he should marry her. |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by OneKinGuy(m): 7:53am On Jul 07, 2019 |
OP, watch the move 'Plus One'. You don't marry somebody because you love the person to the fullest. You marry to learn toove someone. Nobody is perfect. True love/Love mate/love at first sight doesn't exist. If it does, You should be travelling thousands of kilometers to find them. What am I trying to say? MARRY THAT GIRL AND LEARN TO LOVE HER. Your love bar doesn't have to be 100% before you love her. I rest my case |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by Triniti(m): 7:53am On Jul 07, 2019 |
NkemChukwudi:Are you the op? If not,run along boy 1 Like |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by francisduru: 7:54am On Jul 07, 2019 |
Scammer |
Re: She Is Pregnant With Twins But I Honestly Don't Want To Marry Her. by wolverine1987: 7:55am On Jul 07, 2019 |
sirdouglas:Sirdouglas I'm sure you've have been familiar with nairaland for some time now. If u r seeking advise from nairaland be ready for the rude the childish the broke the matured the intelligent. Then sieve the the advise and pick the one u need n block ur mind from the others. Replying every childish remark or jabbs won't help u. Now back to the matter do what your mind tells you to do. You are the one wearing the shoe u know how it pinches. Buh whatever decision u make just b ready for the repercussions later it may b good n it may b bad. Either u marry her or just accept the kids its ur decision to make lass lass. I cant imagine what u r going tru now buh I wish u all the best sir. 1 Like |
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