pat077:
so the man can take custody of the child if he's a Muslim, but can't take custody if he marries the lady traditionally?

Unfortunately it is the country we find ourselves. Different laws for "special citizens"

Ybaby:


Even there is shoe of N500 - just that it is rubber.
There is also indomie N100 - in fact the child will bellyful to je pe
There is also public school - but you will supplement with broom and tissue for the teacher
Even at the age of 5 year old the child can start contributing to the family financially hawking one or two things to help the father.

This is your dream/vision for your spurn, for your heir, for your legacy. Clap for yourself!! Infact! well done sir

I am in total support of her action - my first loyalty is to my children, to give them the best footing in life. She is a very wise woman. OP will be fine - I hope he doubles his hustle before impregnating the next woman. It beats me how a poor man can have urges to fccuk a woman .....all you are supposed to be thinking about is where to get the next coin. Fccuuk is not a recreational activity it is a reproduction activity.

What is wrong with a rubber shoe? Hell, i saw an almost 20k rubber shoe on Jumia one time. What is a shoe? It is basically a covering for the foot. Does a rubber shoe not cover the foot?

Am sure you are the type who judges a book by its cover. One has to be rich to mean anything to you. One is a failure as long as he is not rich, abi? Statistically, how many Nigerians are rich, less than 10%. How much is the minimum wage, still N18k? How much the op give, N15k monthly. Remind me if only the 10% of rich Nigerians give birth.

Fuccking is what? Are you for real? Have you fuccked before? How many children do you have from the bleeps? If you dont have any then you should be ashamed you fuccked for nothing. If you have, then i hope you have 1 child per fucck so we know, "fuccking is not a recreational activity but a reproductive activity".

A elderly Pastor in an orthodox church in my area had his church marriage annulled just last month. The church hierarchy up to HQ sat on his matter. He was widowed and had grown up children but remarried. For 3 yrs this man had no sex with his new wife until he could not hold up any longer. Somehow, he discovered that she had a genetic condition where sex was impossible. She knew she was going to be a virgin for her lifetime but didn't tell, the marriage was annulled by the church (so i heard).

During my marriage counseling, we were lectured from the scripture that sex was marriage and marriage is sex. Children are not as important to a marriage as sex is. If this is so, how correct are you that, "sex is not a recreational activity it is a reproduction activity".

If i should go by you, love is totally unnecessary, all a man needs to marry a woman is money. All a woman needs from a man is money. Romeo and Juliet are both fools for falling in love. In fact, the rich and poor should not mingle.

Enough of all that. I think you have the poor man logic. The only thing you need to escape poverty is find a rich guy. You made that a logic and it clouds your reasoning. Am sure you have been to school or still going to school. Why dont you just stop, since you are either married or will marry a rich guy that will take care of all your needs. Why did you go to school when you will marry a rich guy who has money? Are you going to work after school or you went to school only to attract a rich guy?

15k is nothing, do you even earn 15k? Are you responsible to anyone other than yourself for up to 15k?

You even had the effrontery to mention baby formula, do you even know what baby formula is actually for? Is it for every baby?

linnyx:


Unfortunately it is the country we find ourselves. Different laws for "special citizens"

so Muslims are special citizens

citadels:
my dear you are right. If you did not marry a woman before she gave birth for you the child ain't yours it's in my tradition too.

Your tradition is backward.
So if there is no rich man around to marry her and the child need financial support, and the man refused, won't you call him a dead beat?

Ybaby:


My dear, when it comes to Children money is everything - Children are consumers, they donot produce anything in thier first 3 years except emotional gratitude - they just sleep, eat and school fees and repeat. Children are the greatest golddiggers especially boys - have you seen a woman's breastt after feeding a boy for 6 months - it becomes dilapited like bathroom slipper - they suck the milk and the blood. They come hungry from heaven nad if you donot give them food they will scream the house down. Not a poor man's hobby at all. Please if you are poor and want children - go hustle first.

Back to the op. If it were about money, who do you think should have the 2yr old, the guy who works and has been giving the woman 15k monthly or the woman who does not work and is looking for a rich guy who will give her more than 15k a month for doing nothing.

We are talking about of a live baby here, kapish!

Girl, you need to set your mind straight, cause its kinda going brownian.

adanny01:


Back to the op. If it were about money, who do you think should have the 2yr old, the guy who works and has been giving the woman 15k monthly or the woman who does not work and is looking for a rich guy who will give her more than 15k a month for doing nothing.

We are talking about of a live baby here, kapish!

Girl, you need to set your mind straight, cause its kinda going brownian.

You are wasting your time and intelligence on a slay mama without brain.
The way some of them reason, even a cockroach will do better.

It is a fact that the court will normally give the custody of the child to the mother. But immidiately the child reach the age of 8, the judge will allow the child to choose his preference between mum and dad.

Interesting discussion

Asquare84:


Why did Regina Daniel and her siblings did not look for their father

A boy and a girl are not the same. A girl will get married and leave her people but a boy would be interested in knowing who he is and where he came from and his roots. A man is not complete unless he knows these things.

Says the broke bastard that can't take care of his family. Hahahabajahahahahhahaha. I see you're still pained. Stupid woman beater with irresponsible and poor parents.

tydi:



That she male spongeisback is really a useless fellow.
Ignore him!

Ikwerres are not igbos.

Mandeyy:
Ikwerres are Igbos, even though they denied it. Igbo is Igbo. We practise the same culture in Anambra.

Mutemenot:


As if school is your last hope in life... You are probably a student, by the time you get to a certain age you 'll retract your comments here ....

So what is the last hope in life - abi the boy should not go to school ni? You people like to fight everything except poverty

themanderon:


A boy and a girl are not the same. A girl will get married and leave her people but a boy would be interested in knowing who he is and where he came from and his roots. A man is not complete unless he knows these things.

complete fire.... too funny!! A man is not complete if a rich man takes his son because all he has is 15k a month

breezeng:
It is a fact that the court will normally give the custody of the child to the mother. But immidiately the child reach the age of 8, the judge will allow the child to choose his preference between mum and dad.

Fair enough as long as the boy can see his biological father's room and parlor and 15k a month allowance for him before making such a decision. So he can use his hand to choose heaven or hell.

Ybaby:



complete fire.... too funny!! A man is not complete if a rich man takes his son because all he has is 15k a month

Wealth cannot be compared to finding out who you truly are. Many people in motherless babies home would give the world to find out who they really are and where they come from.

adanny01:


What is wrong with a rubber shoe? Hell, i saw an almost 20k rubber shoe on Jumia one time. What is a shoe? It is basically a covering for the foot. Does a rubber shoe not cover the foot?

Am sure you are the type who judges a book by its cover. One has to be rich to mean anything to you. One is a failure as long as he is not rich, abi? Statistically, how many Nigerians are rich, less than 10%. How much is the minimum wage, still N18k? How much the op give, N15k monthly. Remind me if only the 10% of rich Nigerians give birth.

Fuccking is what? Are you for real? Have you fuccked before? How many children do you have from the bleeps? If you dont have any then you should be ashamed you fuccked for nothing. If you have, then i hope you have 1 child per fucck so we know, "fuccking is not a recreational activity but a reproductive activity".

A elderly Pastor in an orthodox church in my area had his church marriage annulled just last month. The church hierarchy up to HQ sat on his matter. He was widowed and had grown up children but remarried. For 3 yrs this man had no sex with his new wife until he could not hold up any longer. Somehow, he discovered that she had a genetic condition where sex was impossible. She knew she was going to be a virgin for her lifetime but didn't tell, the marriage was annulled by the church (so i heard).

During my marriage counseling, we were lectured from the scripture that sex was marriage and marriage is sex. Children are not as important to a marriage as sex is. If this is so, how correct are you that, "sex is not a recreational activity it is a reproduction activity".

If i should go by you, love is totally unnecessary, all a man needs to marry a woman is money. All a woman needs from a man is money. Romeo and Juliet are both fools for falling in love. In fact, the rich and poor should not mingle.

Enough of all that. I think you have the poor man logic. The only thing you need to escape poverty is find a rich guy. You made that a logic and it clouds your reasoning. Am sure you have been to school or still going to school. Why dont you just stop, since you are either married or will marry a rich guy that will take care of all your needs. Why did you go to school when you will marry a rich guy who has money? Are you going to work after school or you went to school only to attract a rich guy?

15k is nothing, do you even earn 15k? Are you responsible to anyone other than yourself for up to 15k?

You even had the effrontery to mention baby formula, do you even know what baby formula is actually for? Is it for every baby?

A poor man's pain - oda 15k a month for a child's upkeep is something. Please stop crying.

I just got back from Ebeano and 15k was not enough to buy groceries but it is what a grown man wants his son to live on for a month.

themanderon:


Wealth cannot be compared to finding out who you truly are. Many people in motherless babies home would give the world to find out who they really are and where they come from.

How do you know this?
Are you in a motherless home now?
Have you ever lived in a motherless home?
Are you 100% certain the man you call daddy is your biological father??
Leave matter for matterias!
A child needs nutrition, education, shelter, love, guidance first before history and family affairs

wirinet:

You that can't get a high paying job for yourself want to give someone else a job.

From what you wrote, you have always leached on others for your survival, even into adulthood. It probably the way you were raised to have an entitlement mentality. I will never raise my children to feel they are entitled to sustainance by anyone else in their adulthood. This is why I spend much on other extra curricular activities for my children, computer and music lessons.

I grew up and schooled on the island - Ikoyi and Victoria Island, so you had nothing special to envy.

How do you rate the best schools? Is it by the fees or by performance in external exams? How many times have students from these schools rated among the best students in common entrance. My children's school was among the best performing students in last year's lagos common entrance exams. My nephew had one of the best result in WAEC and JAMB exams two years ago, and he attended an average level private secondary school, he was denied admission into UNILAG because he was only 15.
Money is important, but raising well balanced anx happy children goes beyond money.

Are your kids in Ikoyi now or Victoria Island??
How do you spend so much on extra curricular studies when you were poor for 3 years - say their mum spends extra
Oga my husband is not complaining about being responsible for me - I am home when my kids are home and have a thriving business but my husband does not depend on me financially - he is a capable and responsible man. Don't complain on his behalf.

My dear. The way we glorify poverty in this country is disgusting. No wonder you will see a man driving okada with four kids and his wife will be pregnant for the fifth.

Kids are bloody expensive. Sometimes when i go to shop for mine i get weak after the cashier adds up everything.

So many kids suffering today is because of irresponsible adults that sees nothing wrong in "just manage". Plan before you have kids. 15k cannot take proper care of a child in a month.

Ybaby:


My father is a great provider and i went to the best of schools i.e Corona

My husband is a great provider and my kids are in the best of schools i.e Chrisland

Are you a provider? Do you want a better job? I can help

Mstick:
My dear. The way we glorify poverty in this country is disgusting. No wonder you will see a man driving okada with four kids and his wife will be pregnant for the fifth.

Kids are bloody expensive. Sometimes when i go to shop for mine i get weak after the cashier adds up everything.

So many kids suffering today is because of irresponsible adults that sees nothing wrong in "just manage". Plan before you have kids. 15k cannot take proper care of a child in a month.

Somebody say Amen!!!!

Oh please! My father's brother left his first son with the mother of the boy and moved on to make another family. Now the boy is a married man with 5 kids,and he's doing really well. When my uncle heard this he decided to go to the man's family house to beg and the man chased my uncle with cutlass.

themanderon:


A boy and a girl are not the same. A girl will get married and leave her people but a boy would be interested in knowing who he is and where he came from and his roots. A man is not complete unless he knows these things.

pat077:
that's for a legitimate child, but in this case, the child isn't because he was born out of wedlock

You're right

Mandeyy:
What do you understand by the word "legitimate children"? It means children born in marriage. There's no marriage here.

That's right, thanks for the correction.

Ybaby:


A poor man's pain - oda 15k a month for a child's upkeep is something. Please stop crying.

I just got back from Ebeano and 15k was not enough to buy groceries but it is what a grown man wants his son to live on for a month.

Been there, done all that but dropped the act for full responsibility. I have passed that and in the phase of training my children. Even building a house is not important to me now, it is my children's future that concerns me.

After doing all that, i do remember i became redundant at my job 3 months after getting married. My salary turned to a quarter of what it was. We managed, i got a deal and in six 6months a hit a deal that was more than my 3yrs salary combined. After then money stopped again.

All through, my wife didnt leave me because i am jobless and earned ¼ of the salary she married me with. I guess you would have since left, jumping from one man to another to keep a standard you set for your self.

I know some men who's wife will not see 10k in a month, once paid they spend the whole sum with girlfriends and booze. Somehow, the wife struggles and manages providing food by a miracle. So i respect the one who gives his baby mama 15k monthly even though she wants nothing to do with him. Someone else with a billion in his account will not give her a dime.

Why am I talking to someone like you who doesnt know jack about being a wife or mother, someone who doesnt know sacrifice or true love. You are at the place you want to be, beach, parties, clubbing, fashion, slaying and probably fuccking. I dont expect reality to down on you now. When it does, please remember the 15k guy.

pat077:
so Muslims are special citizens

It is you that said it. I didn't say so

Legally you have tangible evidence to claim the fatherhood but not the custody for now, but please keep the pictures and any other documents that link you with both your ex and her son.
i will advise don't try lay claim now because the little boy can't recognize you but pay visits intermittently with gifts to your son and bond with him once in a while.
The family want the highest bidder but DNA test will give them away in future when it is sensible to strike

adanny01:


Been there, done all that but dropped the act for full responsibility. I have passed that and in the phase of training my children. Even building a house is not important to me now, it is my children's future that concerns me.

After doing all that, i do remember i became redundant at my job 3 months after getting married. My salary turned to a quarter of what it was. We managed, i got a deal and in six 6months a hit a deal that was more than my 3yrs salary combined. After then money stopped again.

All through, my wife didnt leave me because i am jobless and earned ¼ of the salary she married me with. I guess you would have since left, jumping from one man to another to keep a standard you set for your self.

I know some men who's wife will not see 10k in a month, once paid they spend the whole sum with girlfriends and booze. Somehow, the wife struggles and manages providing food by a miracle. So i respect the one who gives his baby mama 15k monthly even though she wants nothing to do with him. Someone else with a billion in his account will not give her a dime.

Why am I talking to someone like you who doesnt know jack about being a wife or mother, someone who doesnt know sacrifice or true love. You are at the place you want to be, beach, parties, clubbing, fashion, slaying and probably fuccking. I dont expect reality to down on you now. When it does, please remember the 15k guy.

If your wife was also down how will you feed your son Life happens but the landlord, headmistress, supermarket don't care so as a man you got to get up fast again and be assured that it is your sole responsibility to look after your children and may God help you and open your eyes to opportunities. The bible says anytime a man is unable to look after his family he is worse than an infidel - so 3 months of infidel practise is not too bad but it must be rectified so as to be a noble man again.

Dropped the act of full responsibility for who?? Your wife or her sugar daddy??
Be carefull in dropping your full responsibility it is not something to be proud of - ok?? please carry your full responsibility as the father, husband and leader of your home if you dont - don't come here and say someone is enticing your wife and trying to take your kids

Iogobenz:

Bros make your small money no go finish for court oh!
If I were you na to reason with that rich man make em pay me my cut and you can come back after many years to claim your child when he is older.
Otherwise,I'll say;
Nwanne jee chuba ego..
Because you will be needing a lot of it to claim that child with all the strings the rich guy can pull.
Person no dey lose 2 things!
Court no be for person weh never bath well o

lmao, too funny

Mstick:
Oh please! My father's brother left his first son with the mother of the boy and moved on to make another family. Now the boy is a married man with 5 kids,and he's doing really well. When my uncle heard this he decided to go to the man's family house to beg and the man chased my uncle with cutlass.

Beg that what?

The man should come back and take his rightful position in his family, his maternal relations gave him land and he built a very big house, am sure the knowledge of that was what triggered my uncle.

Ybaby:


Beg that what?

Ybaby:


If your wife was also down how will you feed your son Life happens but the landlord, headmistress, supermarket don't care so as a man you got to get up fast again and be assured that it is your sole responsibility to look after your children and may God help you and open your eyes to opportunities. The bible says anytime a man is unable to look after his family he is worse than an infidel - so 3 months of infidel practise is not too bad but it must be rectified so as to be a noble man again.

Dropped the act of full responsibility for who?? Your wife or her sugar daddy??
Be carefull in dropping your full responsibility it is not something to be proud of - ok?? please carry your full responsibility as the father, husband and leader of your home if you dont - don't come here and say someone is enticing your wife and trying to take your kids

My God! You are impossible. Girl, your reasoning is shit. Every time you talk its just shit, shit, shit and shit.

I have an uncle a very intelligent and renowned psychiatrists. He was responsible and had a promising carreer ahead of him. He was accosted by armed robbers and shot 4 times, 2 in the abdomen, 1 in the chest and 1 in the head. He survived physically but not mentally. His carreer stopped right there. He was kept in the government payroll for 15years receiving salary and not doing any job until a government got tired of supporting him and dismissed him. With no pension.

According to you, he is worst than an infidel.

Around 2015 during the recession, a friend who was very comfortable in the construction industry lost his job because his company had no contract. He had no job nor income until this year they company got contracts and resumed then called him back with twice his entitlement.

According to you, he is worst than an infidel.

My father who is retired, his pension is not enough for the kind of standard of living they had while having 2 adopted kids in the university.

According to you, he is worst than an infidel.

A friend who is running a private Building Electrical Service Design and consultancy business got very low patronage during the 2015 recession also say his income come down from a 500k average per month to as low as 50k. There were times when he had to park his car due to a fault and enter taxi for a month. He was broke as hell.

According to you, he is worst than an infidel.

By you, Job in the bible is worst than an infidel. You need a new line of thought.

Mstick:
The man should come back and take his rightful position in his family, his maternal relations gave him land and he built a very big house, am sure the knowledge of that was what triggered my uncle.

Your uncle is a very funny man - I am happy the cutlass did not hit him. He should avoid triggering his son in future abeg. Want to eat where he did not sow?!

My brother I am grateful there are men like you who have a vision for their children and labour hard to achieve it. We praise you and depend on your greatness. Na man you be!!
The human race is moving forward because of men like you - we have less hungry kids because of men like you. If an area father like MC Oluomo's son can be choosen at Harvard and MIT because he was the best in his class in the USA then any man in his right thinking mind should find a way to provide for his children and change the trajectory of his legacy/ generation.

Every roof in this world was nailed there by men - never seen a woman nailing a roof before. Men are the labour face of the human race and we salute provider men ONLY. I respect MC Oluomo for his vision for his family. That boy will finish school now and he will lobby one nice position for him in the Government - a position that MC olumo could never attain to because of lack of proper education.

If an illiterate can have vision for his children then how much more educated people - but some will come here to argue about how Unilag is the same as Havard. I don't get it! As a woman I have a vision for my children and chose a man who can help me achieve it - Na MIT or Havard we dey go so.