axglide:


What is wrong with this quote?



Even under common Law, it states "However for custody of Legitimate children, under common Law a father has absolute right to the custody of his legitimate children under maturity."

Like i said before, if he has money and hopefully a good lawyer, he can win the case, but he needs to contend with the TALFORD ACT 1839 and THE CUSTODY OF INFANT ACT 1872, though All these pre-1900 statute recognized the right of either parents to the custody of legitimate child. Also see ABIAKAM AND OTHERS V. ABIAKAM

that's for a legitimate child, but in this case, the child isn't because he was born out of wedlock

VillagePipu:


Story.
That's if the child's father is an idiotic illiterate.

The same Igbo tradition that doesn't allow women inherit property is the one you're referring to.

It's from High Court the mother's people would start receiving judicial beating.

Nigeria's laws supercede Customary laws.

Be guided. Customary laws are part of Nigerian laws. Insofar as he didn't marry the lady, the child is not his. The customary law also supports this. Customary laws are made up of the traditions of people. Male inheritance is not backed up by customary law, but a case such as this one, is backed up by customary laws. In fact, male inheritance is wickedness, and is against natural justice. Also, impregnating a girl without marrying her is still not good, and no parents will agree to give you the child. Even the law supports that a marriage, either customary (traditional) or court (statutory) has to be contracted, otherwise the child is illegitimate. The customary law also gives a backing to the traditions of 'peoples'. You'll see that he'll lose if he goes to court. I've seen such a case in my village. Even when the man hired a good lawyer, he still lost the case.

linearity:


Not totally true, as there are no clear cut victories going into court.

If he gets a good lawyer, the child can even be taken from the mother, if they stress attempted and actual parental alienation on the part of the mother.

The courts favors the kids to have access to both parents...from his story, it appear that the mother in collusion with the step-father and her people have engaged in alienating him from the life of the child and to give the child to the step-father in the name of their tradition.

Obviously the child’s continual stay with the mother under those conditions, will not foster a good relationship with father, which law requires.

I understand fully well that, this is Nigeria and that, the highest bidder can sometimes buy the most favorable outcome in courts.

Does he have the money to prove he is the father medically (DNA)

Ybaby:



Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!! .............looooooool.............You are angry ...... sorry drink some cold water then understand that children do not understand hard times they will just be shouting I am hungry ...... can I have some snacks?? I want tea, Please give me biscuits, can I have cake? and there schools too will be asking for school fees. Kids are a luxury - condoms are cheaper.

You are an idi*t, but you got a point here!

jeyselassie:
bro let me tel you a deep truth may be hard to swallow. Look focus and get yourself and your finances grounded. Ignore all of them totally. Believe me the child will come back. You don't need to disturb or stress yourself. Its a natural law I've seen playing out times without number.

Guy not in all cases... If the baby grows up to become a touts that might want to take revenge on the father... You wouldn't want to associate with him.

The impression of a mother on the narration of who one's father is is very strong

I'm a lawyer, so take my advice.

Don't waste your money on a lawyer, you can't win.

Open an account and pay your child support. Your son will see this thread someday...

Young man get a lawyer and go to court.
You have got to right the paternity issue but custody wiil be granted to the mother except she cannot take care of the child.

Florblu:
Whether you're dead or alive, the child is yours so don't sweat it.

Keep sending the 15k or any amount you can afford and be consistent with it. You will get your child someday, and by then you will be proud of yourself and your decision.

Abeg forget that thing. It is stupidity that will make anyone choose poverty over wealth.

otobasin2323:

She don't even want me to pay a dime on her head . she sees me as a broke ass failure... Talk about me settling down with her she declined.. She has fallen in love with the wealthy man accepting to be second wife.. I just need my Son

Op forget about the child. You too like trouble. Shey someone is taking excellent care of him. And the person is childless. Go and marry another person and born as much as you like, or you have cause to think that that's all the good sperm you've got? Na by force? Leave her alone Oga. You're just a bloody sperm donor. Is that your only wasted sperm??
You want the child yet you have only 15k to offer. Better go and feed yourself. If it was you won't you deny that kind of father? So useless and you still want to drag the innocent soul down with you.
Oga stop unnecessary wahala. if small sense de your head, go and find way to better your life, no time.

Sophiemama:
My dear,there are communities here that will never give you that child without you marrying their daughter, especially in this case where there is a man ready to marry her and become the legitimate father. It is a pity.

Go to their family with your family and pay some dowry on the girl. In my place,there is something you will for the child alone even if you don't want to marry the mother. This is to make the child your legitimate son because in the future you will legitimately marry another woman and this boy will be called a bastard,even by your wife and her children. The mother is doing what is best for her son because the boy will have equal rights as the other children she will birth for the wealthy man.

I am even surprised the op is asking this question and he said he is from Imo state. This custom is not alien to the Igbo's.

SageMK:
This is sad.

Bro, you can't win this legal battle. And that's because a mother has right to the custody of a child born outside wedlock to the exclusion of the father.

Unless maybe you can prove she's unfit as a mother.

NOT TRUE PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!

Ybaby:




Yimu!!!

When did 2 year old boys start eating compatibility I think they prefer to eat Aptamil and 15k a month cannot get them that. Well the boy will have to eat compatibility then. Only a crazy woman will remain with a 15k a month man with a baby in her hands. It does not make any sense.

And the mother? Is she so stupid that she allowed herself to become pregnant when she can't fend for herself? I really don't understand why women will just depend fully on men.

With these evidence you can claim your child with 99% chances. Meet a good lawyer

Your mistakes was that you supposed to pay her bride price during your cohabitation.
nonetheless, you will win the case with this evidence you have

sureteeboy:
So much meaningful comments on this thread so far. Perhaps, Nairaland is starting to change for good

Thought I'm the only observer here.

biacan:
You should have work more had she wouldn't have left you........ Men and brokness nawaooo

hey, don't do the Brokness thing right now, the dude is trying, at least he can send something to his son shows he's a caring father.

SirVintageCock:
Very funny joker you are. She should contribute 10k with all the nanny work and babysitting and childrearing stuffs attached (also working fulltime to make the said money) while the poor ratass sperm donor will contributes 15k without adding any other child chores and at the same time frolicking with different pussies daily.

We are talking about a two year old kid here, my brother. They have long stopped breastfeeding him or her. They can walk and even communicate to some extent. The father is evidently not afraid of all the "nanny work and babysitting and childrearing stuffs attached" that's why he is asking for custody.

It appears as if we think men just dropped from heaven without parents and siblings who can support them in babysitting when they can't do so. And the lady herself has not received any help from people in taking care of this child up till this point.

It's great the lady is not an evening newspaper, but does the man have to become childless?
It appears you are the one who is not happy about the man's happiness. Does he have to suffer for the lady to enjoy her own success? You sound like this is about the lady taking a pound of flesh.

Remember the issue here is not her marrying someone else but another man assuming legal ownership rights over his child without his consent, while he is still alive.

biacan:
You should have work more had she wouldn't have left you........ Men and brokness nawaooo

You never seize to amaze me with your hate for men .

Signed.

Vice President,

Bachelors Club

Ikeja, Lagos Branch.

sedutrice:

And the mother? Is she so stupid that she allowed herself to become pregnant when she can't fend for herself? I really don't understand why women will just depend fully on men.

thank God for your reasoning. I don't understand why some girls think it's a man's job to cater for everything, well make they nor worry, marriage go open their eyes

schumastic:

You never seize to amaze me with your hate for men .
Signed.
Vice President,
Bachelors Club
Ikeja, Lagos Branch.

i don't think she hates men, she's just trolling

tomdon:





Op forget about the child. You too like trouble. Shey someone is taking excellent care of him. And the person is childless. Go and marry another person and born as much as you like, or you have cause to think that that's all the good sperm you've got? Na by force? Leave her alone Oga. You're just a bloody sperm donor. Is that your only wasted sperm??
Oga stop unnecessary wahala if small sense de your head if not you will keep plunging more into the valley of lack

you make sense in a harsh way, but it's not easy leaving ones child, you won't understand the affection for one's child until you are at the brink of loosing yours. I'm typing this cause I'm there right now, only being calm cause my ex and her family are good people and will never deny me seeing my son. we separated because of genotype and nothing could be done about it. a fathers love cannot be explained

wirinet:

Are you telling me you think women add no value to the family beside sex and giving birth to children? Now, tell me what you bring to the table in a relationship. You talk as if women are incapacitated or invalid.

You are just juvenile raised with poor values. Even in wealthy advanced nations, women contribute to the family and don't just sit down depending on men to provide all their need, because of the hole between their legs.

She is telling exactly how she thinks. That she thinks a woman should depend fully on a man. She just explaining to you what she see in the environment where she grows up, of women cheating when their husband can't foot the bill. And she would probably do the same if she is in their shoes or she is just really young. With thoughts like that no wonder some men think women are stupid.
You as a woman, own your body don't bring a child to the world if you can't take care of her.
If you want to train a healthy child you can't just assume someone would just foot all the bills.

Me, I don't care about the men. E just dey pain me when women no arrange their lives.

The woman can marry whoever she likes but the real father, the woman and the rich man should come to a good arrangement on what's vest for the child

otobasin2323:
Good day nairalanders, ( pls ignore my errors, I am not good in typing ) I had a baby with one lady from rivers state(ex girlfriend) and I am from imo state, the baby turns out to be a boy he is 2 years old now. The lady lived with me during her pregnancy and also Gave birth under my roof.. 9months after giving birth, we started having issue. Based on am not well to do.. Cause my hustle ain't paying off. She left the house with my son. Later on she and her family found a man who has been married for so long but no child.. But the man is very wealthy and well to do in the society, the man is also from their town in rivers state ,she agreed to be the second wife so he can claim the child.

on hearing this I rejected it and met with her family so they can release my son to me and she can go ahead and marry whom ever she likes.. To my greatest suprise they all decline to my request but gave her full support that she should go ahead quoting me that in their tradition "any man that marries a lady that is with a child the child automatically answers the man's name"

With this statement it got me sad, angry cause I love my son with all my heart I don't want another man to father him.. Every month I Normally send her 15k for keep up my son... She ain't satisfied.. That am too poor for her liking... How do I take her to court the only documents I have here.. Is my sons birth certificate, his pictures with me. And all the receipt of the money I normally sent to her monthly... Pls I seriously need advice or suggestions. Thank you

join this group on Facebook as it comprises of several legal team...I have read were they have treated several issues like urs...get in touch with one of the admin if the group and they would advise u on what to do.....https://m./133527986816712?group_view_referrer=profile_browser

MANGAM:


U can't claim a child from a woman that traditionally, legally religiously u didn't pay a dine on the mother. U want a child from her and never bothered to do something on her head.

I believe that by now lawyers would have answered your question. If not, get a good lawyer to argue your case in the court. It is your right to stay with your son, irrespective of whether you paid bride price or not.

akp202:
join this group on Facebook as it comprises of several legal team...I have read were they have treated several issues like urs...get in touch with one of the admin if the group and they would advise u on what to do.....https://m./133527986816712?group_view_referrer=profile_browser

Don't join any group please. Go to a lawyer in your city of residence and hire him. Facebook is full of shit and scammers. Beware of fraudsters.

Analysiscorner:

Don't join any group please. Go to a lawyer in your city of residence and hire him. Facebook is full of shit and scammers. Beware of fraudsters.

it's quite unfortunate people don't find out the truth before terming every act to be scam

Iogobenz:

Bros make your small money no go finish for court oh!
If I were you na to reason with that rich man make em pay me my cut and you can come back after many years to claim your child when he is older.
Otherwise,I'll say;
Nwanne jee chuba ego..
Because you will be needing a lot of it to claim that child with all the strings the rich guy can pull.
Person no dey lose 2 things!
Court no be for person weh never bath well o

Gbamsolutely correct Jee chuba ego

biacan:
You should have work more had she wouldn't have left you........ Men and brokness nawaooo

how much v u worked all yr life? He doesn't v now dnt mean he won't v tommoro.

[The only way to be happy wjil
e waiting for the out come is to have cordial with the mother quote author=otobasin2323 post=80207378]Good day nairalanders, ( pls ignore my errors, I am not good in typing ) I had a baby with one lady from rivers state(ex girlfriend) and I am from imo state, the baby turns out to be a boy he is 2 years old now. The lady lived with me during her pregnancy and also Gave birth under my roof.. 9months after giving birth, we started having issue. Based on am not well to do.. Cause my hustle ain't paying off. She left the house with my son. Later on she and her family found a man who has been married for so long but no child.. But the man is very wealthy and well to do in the society, the man is also from their town in rivers state ,she agreed to be the second wife so he can claim the child.

on hearing this I rejected it and met with her family so they can release my son to me and she can go ahead and marry whom ever she likes.. To my greatest suprise they all decline to my request but gave her full support that she should go ahead quoting me that in their tradition "any man that marries a lady that is with a child the child automatically answers the man's name"

With this statement it got me sad, angry cause I love my son with all my heart I don't want another man to father him.. Every month I Normally send her 15k for keep up my son... She ain't satisfied.. That am too poor for her liking... How do I take her to court the only documents I have here.. Is my sons birth certificate, his pictures with me. And all the receipt of the money I normally sent to her monthly... Pls I seriously need advice or suggestions. Thank you[/quote]

The tradition that once a woman remarries, the child she brings into the marriage bears the new husband's name is strange to law. The position of the law will never change when it comes to custody and access to child(ren) when parents have issues. The child(ren) cannot and must not be use as a pawn between parents. Both parents have equal access and custody.

Your best bet is to approach the court for custody and access to your child. All you need is to get an Order from the Magistrate court within your jurisdiction. Provide your lawyer with the evidence and documents you mentioned. Once an order is sought and gotten, the law will provide you the means by way of Court Sheriffs to ensure that the court order is adhered to.

pat077:
I am even surprised the op is asking this question and he said he is from Imo state. This custom is not alien to the Igbo's.

The child right now is even addressed as a bastard in that community and the mother will be shamed.

How can you drag over a living person? Allow anyone who wants to care for your son to care for him . Since his your biological son, you are not losing anything as he will grow up and still answer you as his father.

gud morning bro,to me weather tradition or no tradition,that child belongs to you,so to me since you have accepted the responsibility of that child from wen he is in the womb,even uptill nown ogar go to social werfare with all the evidence you have got,even if the child shud not grow up with you bt let that child not bear another idiots name that dose'nt know the stress it takes a man to produce a baby,because if that baby's name is change that is were it will be difficult for you to get him back.if he wants a child of his own let him go and adopt one not your own