Reference:


So how do you take her to see a doctor without telling her the reasons for seeking medical help.

Please, anyone you cannot have a frank and open discussion with cannot be considered a relation to you. What kind of thinking is this.

By the way she should have informed the husband a long time before that. I just cannot understand what marraiges are becoming these days. Folks just live anyhow with enamored secrets and useless agendas. The mum's burden is her burden and so becomes the burden of the husband automatically. What is there to hide.

A adult woman can decide to spoil her mother with a routine medical check-up, its a sign of love. Plus, apart from reproductive matters, women of a certain age need to keep an eye on their blood pressure, cholesterol and other stuff. So she probably needs to see the doctor anyway

Yeah maybe she could have informed the husband beforehand, she probably found it too embarrassing or she was already used to it and forgot that other people outside of her family wouldnt understand.

Better to do something now before one of those kids says something out of pocket and bursts the whole thing

Its your mom, you have to find Some way to talk to her about it, especially since you can't keep lying about the foul smell your husband or visitors will keep catching in your home! This talk should center on how to get help for the situation once and for all!!
Meanwhile...
Are you a teacher?
Get FREE access to the best compilation of school lesson notes/plans, curriculum and exams. Visit my signature for details...

Make her to know more about Tacha, from there she will figure out the rest.

bleskid:
you don't love your mom... f***k you is not every thing u bring on Media ,,, f***k you again find a solution and cover her up ... I hate nonsense why must u bring it on media don't you have respect for your mom, so you don't love your privacy

u r talking like ds because u r not in her shoes. Perhaps u have a good and levelheaded woman as mother. Lucky you!
I can relate wella with d op.

Some women are just toxic and unadviceable, irrespective of ur relationship with them. They ate just dt way. Take a look at a being like tacha for size.
I don't envy d op one bit.

Respeckk:
Matured advice please.....

Ever since i was small my mum have always have this unpleasant smell.she baths often but this smell have choose to not go away, i heard she got an infection after a miscarriage because we do discuss it amongst ourselves,we her children. The smell comes from her private and i dont know if she is aware of it. She baths often but after sometime the smell starts again.

She came to my house for visit and i was embarrassed when my husband passed and was asking what was stinking up the kids room, i know it was my mum but i told him something else.

She is someone that always like tying wrapper without any under and you can imagine how it is.

I dont want to embarrass but i know it has always been an issue with my dad(they have seperate room coz of this).she get angry easy too but i really have to.

Ps she has treated infection often and on but this smell is what i dont understand.doctors should help too.
Why is it that the smell refuse to go away because she bathes morning and night(rule while growing up in our house)

Go together with her to see a Gynecologist

grace008:
Make her to know more about Tacha, from there she will figure out the rest.

weree re o

Met a doctor who would help you come up with a plan

It nt a big problem.u need wirdom to deal with this. 1.get a doctor n i dnt mean quack doctor.explain everything to the doctor. 2 plan with the dobtor to pretend to be ur frnd.then pretend to be sick.during dis period be sure ur mum is around then tell her u need to see a doctor and let her knw the doctor is ur frnd then tell her she plz go with u that u feel weak to go alone. Then when u guys there u n d doctor stay away frm her for a while later bout 30mint u n doctor will go meet her where she was sitting,then pretend like u tru n u guys r can go home. Now the doctor will say b4 u guys can leave he/she will like to do a favour for mama has her frnd mother,then the doctor will tell mama that he/she wat to run a general text for her for free and if there is any need for treatment it will be done for her for free also. So she shud worry bout payment. Plz take this steps u won't regret it. From there her healing process has began. Then u take up frm there. God bless u all. And always pray.

HRHQueenPhil:
Abeg call family meeting & tell her. But u need to get a doctor advise not nairaland doctor oh

what is wise about calling a family meeting biko?

Respeckk:
Matured advice please.....

Ever since i was small my mum have always have this unpleasant smell.she baths often but this smell have choose to not go away, i heard she got an infection after a miscarriage because we do discuss it amongst ourselves,we her children. The smell comes from her private and i dont know if she is aware of it. She baths often but after sometime the smell starts again.

She came to my house for visit and i was embarrassed when my husband passed and was asking what was stinking up the kids room, i know it was my mum but i told him something else.

She is someone that always like tying wrapper without any under and you can imagine how it is.

I dont want to embarrass but i know it has always been an issue with my dad(they have seperate room coz of this).she get angry easy too but i really have to.

Ps she has treated infection often and on but this smell is what i dont understand.doctors should help too.
Why is it that the smell refuse to go away because she bathes morning and night(rule while growing up in our house)

Had miscarriage, please consult a doctor. The possible solution will be surgery. Mind you, she is aware of it but she does not know the solution. I am sure she will be happy to hear from you having a solution. But before you have a talk with her, consult a doctor and have idea of the cost involved.

To have brain (ako na Uche) is a gift. Tell her that you want to take her to hospital for medical checkups . tell Dr what the Matter is. And take her there. Let Dr tell her in ur present and treatment shld start immediately.

Nkan nbé!

Respeckk:
Now she is visiting i want to do treat it,my dad is the last person she will listen to because she will see it as insult(always cat and dog) .

No try tell am o...

NO JUST TRY AM...

e too heavy 4 ur mouth. I don talk ma own

This might be a solution. You have to be creative. First, you go to a doctor, narrate to him, tell the Dr to be ur friend at the moment, tell him to visit you in ur home, when Dr come to the house on seeing ur mom he will say ah mommy what happened to ur eye, this is not healthy. Dr will face and tell u to bring mommy to the hospital tomorrow to run a test on her. From their the Dr know what to do, it will womb scan. I hope you read this. Best of luck.


The truth is that something has decay in her womb and needs urgent flushing.

Respeckk:
Matured advice please.....

Ever since i was small my mum have always have this unpleasant smell.she baths often but this smell have choose to not go away, i heard she got an infection after a miscarriage because we do discuss it amongst ourselves,we her children. The smell comes from her private and i dont know if she is aware of it. She baths often but after sometime the smell starts again.

She came to my house for visit and i was embarrassed when my husband passed and was asking what was stinking up the kids room, i know it was my mum but i told him something else.

She is someone that always like tying wrapper without any under and you can imagine how it is.

I dont want to embarrass but i know it has always been an issue with my dad(they have seperate room coz of this).she get angry easy too but i really have to.

Ps she has treated infection often and on but this smell is what i dont understand.doctors should help too.
Why is it that the smell refuse to go away because she bathes morning and night(rule while growing up in our house)

no too worry yourself ur own go soon begin smell.every woman smells once they approach 50.let her be more hygienic that odour no get cure.

Respeckk:


Family meeting would involve 9 people oooo

Does she have any other minor health issue: Like may be recurrent headache, poor sleep or just anything?

If yes...

Then u can use dat as a cover up to take her to a doctor.

But u would have discussed d REAL ISSUE with d doctor - but d doctor won't tell her abt it.

Respeckk:

I alone,but its just too sensitive a topic dont want to sound insulting,evrything is a trigger.

that makes it easy for you. Besides, you're a woman so it's easier to connect with her. I'm shocked that you have not studied your mom for years and understood her psychology so you can know where to soften her so that you can talk to her without creating problem.

Appreciate her beauty...tell her how you want her to still feel young in and out. Then tell her you found out something that will improve her health and why she must visit a doctor. Her brain must have adopted that smell that she's now indifferent or does not know it exists. If you kick that into her and instances people noticed the smell , but didn't know where it's coming from(like in the case of your husband), she will become conscious and willing to find solutions.

Pray before talking to her.

Since you're all grown up why not you, your siblings and your dad if he's an understanding type seek medical help for her. Only after that can you talk to her.

You'll marvel the sacrifices she made just to see her children doing great.

yvelchstores:
This is strange. I am guessing there will be a discharge as well to warrant the smell. Doctors, what could cause this? Is it spiritual?

spiritual Wetin ur own go soon start.

Respeckk:
Matured advice please.....

Ever since i was small my mum have always have this unpleasant smell.she baths often but this smell have choose to not go away, i heard she got an infection after a miscarriage because we do discuss it amongst ourselves,we her children. The smell comes from her private and i dont know if she is aware of it. She baths often but after sometime the smell starts again.

She came to my house for visit and i was embarrassed when my husband passed and was asking what was stinking up the kids room, i know it was my mum but i told him something else.

She is someone that always like tying wrapper without any under and you can imagine how it is.

I dont want to embarrass but i know it has always been an issue with my dad(they have seperate room coz of this).she get angry easy too but i really have to.

Ps she has treated infection often and on but this smell is what i dont understand.doctors should help too.
Why is it that the smell refuse to go away because she bathes morning and night(rule while growing up in our house)

it's a medical case it might need surgery & antibiotics

Imagine! No be you get family but see where you don analyze matter reach?

richie240:

A person that no one can talk to/advice. is ft one a person?
I just pray she does not cause crack in d daughter's marriage cos, one way or d other, d son in law will put 2 and 2 together and figure out dt d smell pervades anytime his mother in law is around.
The mama cuts across as not only toxic and odious underneath but in personality.

bukatyne:
Take her to the hospital for general body checkup as per her age.

Tell the doctor forehand and then take it from there.

Best Advice so far...

@ Respeckk
Here is a simple way to tell but you have to be blunt.
Have this discussion when its just you and her

1) mum, how will you feel if someone talks or insult you and i can't do anything.
Mum: i will feel bad

2) mum, do you knw i love you much that i can't anything bad happen to you
Mum: yes i know dear but why all these talks.

Here lies the blunt part but you have to be mature about it.

You: Mum, i feel age is telling on you and its beginning to cause some changes in your system but since i want the best for you, i have arrange a meeting with the doctor to give you a proper checkup and possible treatment to keep you for us..

Mum: believe me, she knows where you are headed to but will smile and tell you no problem.

Finally the treatment starts, and i hope medically it gets better... Good day ma.

Since you and her are 5&6 then open up to her and let her know that you will be taking her to see a doctor... Pls let her know that infection cause it and nothing else... Cos she might be taking it that she's dirty and women don't like to be told such...

whitering:
This is one of the shortcomings of some Africa parents. they instill fear into their children, therefore, Children don't see them as friends that they can freely relate with. ... Since you are now married, Just boldly tell her. or tell her to accompany you to see a Gynecologist that you are feeling some how with your own body... after the fake checkup, just tell the doc that your mum is ageing and you want her to do general checkup... pls don't forget to meet the doc beforehand.

It has nothing to do with African parenting. All over the world nobody just jumps up to tell their parents such things, except the person has issues. It's a parent, not a sibling or friend!

Respeckk:

I alone,but its just too sensitive a topic dont want to sound insulting,evrything is a trigger.

If you don't tell her, one day one of your kids might blurt it out and offend her. You know how kids don't have a filter for such things. Why don't you just do it, but do it lovingly or, as people have suggested, in a hospital with the agreement of a doctor?

Respeckk:
Matured advice please.....

Ever since i was small my mum have always have this unpleasant smell.she baths often but this smell have choose to not go away, i heard she got an infection after a miscarriage because we do discuss it amongst ourselves,we her children. The smell comes from her private and i dont know if she is aware of it. She baths often but after sometime the smell starts again.

She came to my house for visit and i was embarrassed when my husband passed and was asking what was stinking up the kids room, i know it was my mum but i told him something else.

She is someone that always like tying wrapper without any under and you can imagine how it is.

I dont want to embarrass but i know it has always been an issue with my dad(they have seperate room coz of this).she get angry easy too but i really have to.

Ps she has treated infection often and on but this smell is what i dont understand.doctors should help too.
Why is it that the smell refuse to go away because she bathes morning and night(rule while growing up in our house)

How to tell her she smells?

Just say - Mum, you Tacha!

u nor well!
On a more serious note, going thru d op's post, one can't but deduce dt d woman na ceecee+tacha combined.
If for decades, ur family can't tell u d truth for fear of backlash, who wan come tell u?

pjosh1:
Imagine! No be you get family but see where you don analyze matter reach?

Pls I will advice you has a medical personnel here try to go see a doctor ahead of time before taking her there preferably a private hospital were she can properly taken good care of

HRHQueenPhil:
Abeg call family meeting & tell her. But u need to get a doctor advise not nairaland doctor oh

atoh this case no b for nairaland ... we nairaland we handle cases like break up and make up relationship ehennn how I got my job how to maintain your phone ,, not body odor ...

hmm, maybe its the house thats smelling, get air fresheners and perfumes.