₦airaland Forum

LadySarah:
sighs.You Dont get it. She was given a dose of her own medicine. Theres nothing to argue here.

You can't make this stuff up mehn. Some of you chics are just comedians.

Isn't the usual sermon around here something like, "a man has no reason whatsoever to lay his hands on his wife."

So you mean to tell me now that there are actually some good reasons to beat women up, especially when she's getting a dose of her own medicine, yes?

crackhaus:

You can't make this stuff up mehn. Some of you chics are just comedians.

Isn't the usual sermon around here something like, "a man has no reason whatsoever to lay his hands on his wife."

So you mean to tell me now that there are actually some good reasons to beat women up, yes?

You are thrilled.Go on until You pratice it

Mrcashman87:
...

As a Christian I'll say pray. Post your story in www.Christianforums.net to get more godly advice.

Guest007:
You really helped me understand the situation and to appreciate love... Op obviously loves his wife because things would never get this far if he didn't love her... Love can make a fool out of us but the children deserve a functioning home, even if it's without the mothers input. I wonder if he has child care in place, and then he can pull away emotionally... even if it's a family member that he trusts. Then he can choose to work with/on her or frankly dump her because nobody can accuse him of not trying.

Lol yes oh. Can you believe on top of all the atrocities the woman committed, the guy can't even name the thread "I regret marrying my wife". He had to put "sometimes". Sometimes?! Na real love be that so what will it take for him to regret it all the time??

Well he has said that she is kind to the kids so I guess that's not the problem. Plus he hasn't really dealt with the issue properly. He just went from some arguments to beating her to apologising for it. Some people will never get the message until they get some actual consequences for their actions so he may have to be harder on her around the house so she can get the gist.

I agree with you that he may need to involve some family members in it since she still doesn't get it

Choi! I hope I can find somebody who will love me like this on top all my grammar

Mrcashman87:
Thanks my dear for your advice , I really appreciate it. The problem with my wife is she doesn’t want to believe there’s something wrong with her. I have tried convincing her several times that she should seek for help , but to her she is perfectly fine. She is mrs perfect she doesn’t see anything wrong in herself but always found something wrong in other people. If she is not ready to get help and what else can I do ?She is great with our kids including her nieces and nephews from her family side , she treats them so well , I have never seen her getting mad at them they way she does with other people children including my nieces . Can u just imagine every Sunday she and our kids goes to church and she will leave my nieces at home because she doesn’t want them inside her car. She will buy the kids clothes and my nieces will be left out , she takes kids out without my nieces but whenever her nieces / nephews are around , I will do everything for them and I don’t treat them any different from my own. I love my wife but I’m tired of her , it’s only my kids that are keeping us together because if it wasn’t for them , I would have abandoned her and the house and move on somewhere else

Beyond everything you mentioned I'm really concerned about how abusive she is to your house helps. That woman can kill in anger if care is not taken. I'll advice temporary separation. Find somewhere close to your work place to live for a few months. Compare your peace of mind when there to how it was at home then decide if divorce is the solution.

LadySarah:
You are thrilled.Go on until You pratice it

Is this your final answer?

babythug:
The issues have eaten deep into
The marriage and are not likely to be resolved without external counsel.

Itemise clearly what the issues are and call two
Matured people in her family. And have a round table with them. If things don’t get better in six months get ready to split up amicably.

She seems unhappy and resentful of a few things in the marriage. What I sense is having
So many children all at once sent her into some
Depression which she never really got treatment for! It can be overwhelming and not everyone can manage and adapt to married life so easily!

She’s also got temper issues obviously to hit the dependants so severely

I wish you good luck

Well said my dear, my best Option could be THERAPY...she needs it urgently.

midnighter:
Lol yes oh. Can you believe on top of all the atrocities the woman committed, the guy can't even name the thread "I regret marrying my wife". He had to put "sometimes". Sometimes?! Na real love be that so what will it take for him to regret it all the time??

Well he has said that she is kind to the kids so I guess that's not the problem. Plus he hasn't really dealt with the issue properly. He just went from some arguments to beating her to apologising for it. Some people will never get the message until they get some actual consequences for their actions so he may have to be harder on her around the house so she can get the gist.

I agree with you that he may need to involve some family members in it since she still doesn't get it

Choi! I hope I can find somebody who will love me like this on top all my grammar

See finishing

Men make women insane and then another man becomes responsible of that insanity

My own is small, I'm aggressive verbally and if I'm honest with myself I haven't been tested to this extent. She's broken and no good to herself or anyone until she is fixed and going by op's narrative, he may not be the one to do it.

Right now he is only responsible for his children (I think)

Mrcashman87:
I am not new to nairaland but I have to use this account for my story . I have met her in 2009 she was calm , doesn’t talk much but easily get angry and I also noticed that she wasn’t a good cook but was good in other things ( chores) , it didn’t stopped me from loving her, I didn’t tell any of my people even taught I have sisters that are good cook but I have decided to take care for catering school to learn how to cook which she went for lessons to practice.

We got married in 2013 , she got pregnant that same month and she became so lazy that I will go to work and come back to found the house very messy with everything’s all over the places , dirty dishes and not dinner yet, and I have to take over cleaning and cooking dinner for us.she claimed she couldn’t not longer clean the house , she is tired and need to rest so I have decided to get a house help for her , a small 14 years old this girl was hard working , very obedient but to my wife she is evil , every single day I comes back from work , this girl is always in tears my wife will beat the hell out of her to the extent of giving her black eye , if I confront her she will start accusing me of sleeping with the girl which is not true, I can never stoop so low to sleep with an underage girl. I have nieces of similar ages what I wouldn’t want another person to do to my nieces and wouldn’t do to another person daughter. One time I came back from work to found the girl in a pool of blood , that my wife hit her with a wooden chair and she had a deep cut on her head , I got angry with my wife even her reasons didn’t make sense to me , all because she asked the poor girl to warmed up the baby milk and she mistakenly left it for too long , the milk was too hot to give to the crying baby so she got angry at her and hit her . I have told my wife she shouldn’t act like that no matter what and here come again you are sleeping with her and that’s why u are siding with her , we had an heated argument that I have left the house to cool down , I came back after 5 hours and next morning I have send for my brother to take the girl back to her parents , I have given her money 30k to manage that was how the girl left the house.

When our first child was 6 months , we found out she was 2 months pregnant she cried that the baby is too small , she can’t keep the pregnancy , I have begged her to keep that everything will be alright . Our twins were born a girl and boy , having 3 children under 2 wasn’t easy for us and I have to go to work while she staying with the kids all alone and she was depressed , I have decided to bring in a house help 15 years old boy , the same thing repeated again , she was maltreated him the same thing she did with the girl , that boy didn’t even stays with us for 2 months , he run away . I came back to found her crying that the boy has slapped her and run away, I was angry for what he did even swear if I catch him , he will regret the day he was born but the other way I knew that boy did it for self defence . After the boy left I said no more e help , she will have to manage alone because I couldn’t help her anymore , but my house become dirty that I wouldn’t even want to bring in visitors because of the state of the house , dirty plates can stay in the sink for 3 -4 days , laundry she has a washing machine but she couldn’t bother to do , cooking we eats take away every single night , imagine I comes back home 9pm due to my job and Lagos traffic , at that time I’m even exhausted but I have to started cleaning , one time I got pissed with her that she didn’t wash the eldest daughter school uniform and all her uniform 5 sets of uniform were dirty and she had no clean one to put on in the morning , I have to wash them at 10pm and for her she didn’t see anything wrong with that.

When the twins were 1 years she told me she is tired of staying at home that she wanted to go to work , I have told her to wait at least for them to be a year and 6 months to start school before she can pursue her career but she disagreed with me, so I gave her money for business , she opened a shop . We had an agreement that she should be closing down her shop at 7pm so she could be home with the kids and take care of the house , she was ok and I got a elderly woman as a help , she doesn’t lives with us , she comes at 6 am and closes at 8pm and I also brought 2 of my nieces 18 and 11 to the house. Every since she started working she has never get home on time , sometimes she stays until 10pm , if I talk she get angry and will start raining insults on me , we haven’t make love in a long time , she always complains of being tired , her stomach is paining her etc etc. I have decided to leave her alone and not bother her about sex anymore , and it doesn’t bother too. She acts as im a nobody to her. So it happened in July I came back home to found my niece 11 years old with a deep cut and blood on her eyebrows and my wife did it just because the girl broke a plate so she hit the girl with the broken plate , first all I had to rush her to the hospital and she had 11 stitches and went back home, all I wanted to sit with her and to talk sense with her but she wasn’t even interested all she could do was shouting at me , accusing me of sleeping with both my nieces and the elderly house help , was so angry that I have beaten her badly which I later regretted and apologise to her. That was the first time I have lay my hand on her something I vow not to do to the woman I love but she pushed me so bad and I have been remorseful but she refuse to forgive me . It’s now 4 months we don’t talk , we don’t sleep in the same room , she just do her own and come home anytime she pleases. I just don’t know what to do anymore , I love my wife and children but her attitudes isn’t right. We have 3 beautiful children 5and twins are 4. Sometime i want to divorce her but when I think about my children I just don’t feel like going ahead with divorce but I’m also a human and can’t stop living like this . Please my brothers and sisters help me with your advices

Brother, the situation is hopeless. No amount of optimism from anyone can save this marriage from where it is heading. It will end in separation. If you don't leave her by choice, circumstances will make you.

Better for you to end it by yourself. For your own sake and for that of your children. Also, remember, the people in your life before you met your wife are important. You being married should not make them suffer.

I wish you the best sir

crackhaus:

You can't make this stuff up mehn. Some of you chics are just comedians.

Isn't the usual sermon around here something like, "a man has no reason whatsoever to lay his hands on his wife."

So you mean to tell me now that there are actually some good reasons to beat women up, especially when she's getting a dose of her own medicine, yes?

You are obviously spoiling for arguments and war of words, when your wife beats your sister's son or daughter to the extent of pool of blood and rushing to the hospital, smile with her and pet her okay.

My brain is paining me

Guest007:
See finishing

Men make women insane and then another man becomes responsible of that insanity

My own is small, I'm aggressive verbally and if I'm honest with myself I haven't been tested to this extent. She's broken and no good to herself or anyone until she is fixed and going by op's narrative, he may not be the one to do it.

Right now he is only responsible for his children (I think)

Yeah that has been my point. She needs a multi-pronged solution to tackle all her issues at once. The OP seems to spoil her a lot so he needs to toughen up on her, then she also needs some social interventions

Well they're both responsible for the children but if it gets to that point then he will have to take them. But not until they have tried to patch things up

Mrcashman87:
I am not new to Nairaland but I have to use this account for my story . I have met her in 2009 she was calm , doesn’t talk much but easily get angry and I also noticed that she wasn’t a good cook but was good in other things ( chores) , it didn’t stopped me from loving her, I didn’t tell any of my people even though I have sisters that are good cook but I decided to take her to catering school to learn how to cook which she went for lessons to practice.

We got married in 2013 , she got pregnant that same month and she became so lazy that I will go to work and come back to found the house very messy with everything’s all over the places , dirty dishes and not dinner yet, and I have to take over cleaning and cooking dinner for us. She claimed she could not longer clean the house , she is tired and need to rest so I have decided to get a house help for her , a small 14 years old, this girl was hard working , very obedient but to my wife she is evil , every single day I comes back from work , this girl is always in tears my wife will beat the hell out of her to the extent of giving her black eye , if I confront her she will start accusing me of sleeping with the girl which is not true, I can never stoop so low to sleep with an underage girl. I have nieces of similar ages what I wouldn’t want another person to do to my nieces and wouldn’t do to another person daughter.

One time I came back from work to found the girl in a pool of blood , that my wife hit her with a wooden chair and she had a deep cut on her head , I got angry with my wife even her reasons didn’t make sense to me , all because she asked the poor girl to warmed up the baby milk and she mistakenly left it for too long , the milk was too hot to give to the crying baby so she got angry at her and hit her . I have told my wife she shouldn’t act like that no matter what and here come again you are sleeping with her and that’s why u are siding with her , we had an heated argument that I have left the house to cool down , I came back after 5 hours and next morning I have send for my brother to take the girl back to her parents , I have given her money 30k to manage that was how the girl left the house.

When our first child was 6 months , we found out she was 2 months pregnant she cried that the baby is too small , she can’t keep the pregnancy , I have begged her to keep that everything will be alright . Our twins were born a girl and boy , having 3 children under 2 wasn’t easy for us and I have to go to work while she staying with the kids all alone and she was depressed , I have decided to bring in a house help 15 years old boy , the same thing repeated again , she was maltreated him the same thing she did with the girl , that boy didn’t even stays with us for 2 months , he run away . I came back to found her crying that the boy has slapped her and run away, I was angry for what he did even swear if I catch him , he will regret the day he was born but the other way I knew that boy did it for self defence .

After the boy left I said no more e help , she will have to manage alone because I couldn’t help her anymore , but my house become dirty that I wouldn’t even want to bring in visitors because of the state of the house , dirty plates can stay in the sink for 3 -4 days , laundry she has a washing machine but she couldn’t bother to do , cooking we eats take away every single night , imagine I comes back home 9pm due to my job and Lagos traffic , at that time I’m even exhausted but I have to started cleaning , one time I got pissed with her that she didn’t wash the eldest daughter school uniform and all her uniform 5 sets of uniform were dirty and she had no clean one to put on in the morning , I have to wash them at 10pm and for her she didn’t see anything wrong with that.

When the twins were 1 years she told me she is tired of staying at home that she wanted to go to work , I have told her to wait at least for them to be a year and 6 months to start school before she can pursue her career but she disagreed with me, so I gave her money for business , she opened a shop . We had an agreement that she should be closing down her shop at 7pm so she could be home with the kids and take care of the house , she was ok and I got a elderly woman as a help , she doesn’t lives with us , she comes at 6 am and closes at 8pm and I also brought 2 of my nieces 18 and 11 to the house. Every since she started working she has never get home on time , sometimes she stays until 10pm , if I talk she get angry and will start raining insults on me , we haven’t make love in a long time , she always complains of being tired , her stomach is paining her etc etc. I have decided to leave her alone and not bother her about sex anymore , and it doesn’t bother too. She acts as im a nobody to her. So it happened in July I came back home to found my niece 11 years old with a deep cut and blood on her eyebrows and my wife did it just because the girl broke a plate so she hit the girl with the broken plate , first all I had to rush her to the hospital and she had 11 stitches and went back home, all I wanted to sit with her and to talk sense with her but she wasn’t even interested all she could do was shouting at me , accusing me of sleeping with both my nieces and the elderly house help , was so angry that I have beaten her badly which I later regretted and apologise to her.

That was the first time I have lay my hand on her something I vow not to do to the woman I love but she pushed me so bad and I have been remorseful but she refuse to forgive me . It’s now 4 months we don’t talk , we don’t sleep in the same room , she just do her own and come home anytime she pleases. I just don’t know what to do anymore , I love my wife and children but her attitudes isn’t right. We have 3 beautiful children 5and twins are 4. Sometime i want to divorce her but when I think about my children I just don’t feel like going ahead with divorce but I’m also a human and can’t stop living like this .

Please my brothers and sisters help me with your advices

You saw these traits (get angry easily and couldn't cook) but you turned a blind eye.

Most ladies who hate cooking or can't cook are lazy when it comes house chores.

Advice: I think you should call both families to sit her down but if she refuses to change I will just free style. My only concern is making sure my kids are well taken care of but the day she cheats I will divorce her.

Brothers leave beauty ooo, character is more important. A lady who will give you peace of mind; look at how our brother is being frustrated. Don't pet your spouse too much because she "go see you finish", once she does that, it can never be undone.

I don't encourage divorce but if it ever comes to mind please do it. No man will keep her if she's single, because of her attitude.

franchasng:
You married a very violent and wicked woman!


Any lady that beats and maltreat other people's kids is a wicked woman that does not deserve any mercy from God and from man!

You married the wrong woman, and I doubt there is solution in sight other than divorce or separation.


Your wife was bad before you married her just that you were carried away and didn't pay attention to how she treat other people of lower class around her.

Before you marry any lady, even man, observe how they treat other people below them; their younger siblings, their nephews, nieces, young neighbors, their family help, etc.


Honestly I pity your situation, may God help you oh

Most naija woman only love their kids,they maltreat any other kid who is not theirs.

midnighter:
Yeah that has been my point. She needs a multi-pronged solution to tackle all her issues at once. The OP seems to spoil her a lot so he needs to toughen up on her, then she also needs some social interventions

Well they're both responsible for the children but if it gets to that point then he will have to take them. But not until they have tried to patch things up

Miss Seamstress, which patching you dey talk

Thanks to all of you that have replied, made useful comments ,suggestions and some good advice. I am 99% sure that my wife is not having an affair. I trust her with my life and she has no Male friends or even contact with any men ( that I know of anyway). She also doesn't seem that interested in other men.

Guest007:
Miss Seamstress, which patching you dey talk

Lol love patching oh, very effective

midnighter:
Lol love patching oh, very effective

This one pass love or you really see a happy ending

You're refreshing sis... It's been a pleasure chatting with ya.

We'll derail if we continue oooo

Guest007:
This one pass love or you really see a happy ending

You're refreshing sis... It's been a pleasure chatting with ya.

We'll derail if we continue oooo

Lol e pass love but him love pass too... the guy has already tolerated so much so it means he is ready to go through more for a solution. Plenty of men would have driven her out a very long time ago. I believe it can work if he tackles it strategically.

Thank you dear, and you too

Lol you call this derailing? The thread just hit FP....we go see real madness this night

Just pack out from the house stay away from her for some months or years ignore her she will have sense by force . Thank me later

[quote author=contumely2 post=83366334]So you can't use paragraphs?
What kind of muddled up tosh is that?[/quote
How does it answer the qst, oga lecturer

Mrcashman87:
I am not new to Nairaland but I have to use this account for my story . I have met her in 2009 she was calm , doesn’t talk much but easily get angry and I also noticed that she wasn’t a good cook but was good in other things ( chores) , it didn’t stopped me from loving her, I didn’t tell any of my people even though I have sisters that are good cook but I decided to take her to catering school to learn how to cook which she went for lessons to practice.

We got married in 2013 , she got pregnant that same month and she became so lazy that I will go to work and come back to found the house very messy with everything’s all over the places , dirty dishes and not dinner yet, and I have to take over cleaning and cooking dinner for us. She claimed she could not longer clean the house , she is tired and need to rest so I have decided to get a house help for her , a small 14 years old, this girl was hard working , very obedient but to my wife she is evil , every single day I comes back from work , this girl is always in tears my wife will beat the hell out of her to the extent of giving her black eye , if I confront her she will start accusing me of sleeping with the girl which is not true, I can never stoop so low to sleep with an underage girl. I have nieces of similar ages what I wouldn’t want another person to do to my nieces and wouldn’t do to another person daughter.

One time I came back from work to found the girl in a pool of blood , that my wife hit her with a wooden chair and she had a deep cut on her head , I got angry with my wife even her reasons didn’t make sense to me , all because she asked the poor girl to warmed up the baby milk and she mistakenly left it for too long , the milk was too hot to give to the crying baby so she got angry at her and hit her . I have told my wife she shouldn’t act like that no matter what and here come again you are sleeping with her and that’s why u are siding with her , we had an heated argument that I have left the house to cool down , I came back after 5 hours and next morning I have send for my brother to take the girl back to her parents , I have given her money 30k to manage that was how the girl left the house.

When our first child was 6 months , we found out she was 2 months pregnant she cried that the baby is too small , she can’t keep the pregnancy , I have begged her to keep that everything will be alright . Our twins were born a girl and boy , having 3 children under 2 wasn’t easy for us and I have to go to work while she staying with the kids all alone and she was depressed , I have decided to bring in a house help 15 years old boy , the same thing repeated again , she was maltreated him the same thing she did with the girl , that boy didn’t even stays with us for 2 months , he run away . I came back to found her crying that the boy has slapped her and run away, I was angry for what he did even swear if I catch him , he will regret the day he was born but the other way I knew that boy did it for self defence .

After the boy left I said no more e help , she will have to manage alone because I couldn’t help her anymore , but my house become dirty that I wouldn’t even want to bring in visitors because of the state of the house , dirty plates can stay in the sink for 3 -4 days , laundry she has a washing machine but she couldn’t bother to do , cooking we eats take away every single night , imagine I comes back home 9pm due to my job and Lagos traffic , at that time I’m even exhausted but I have to started cleaning , one time I got pissed with her that she didn’t wash the eldest daughter school uniform and all her uniform 5 sets of uniform were dirty and she had no clean one to put on in the morning , I have to wash them at 10pm and for her she didn’t see anything wrong with that.

When the twins were 1 years she told me she is tired of staying at home that she wanted to go to work , I have told her to wait at least for them to be a year and 6 months to start school before she can pursue her career but she disagreed with me, so I gave her money for business , she opened a shop . We had an agreement that she should be closing down her shop at 7pm so she could be home with the kids and take care of the house , she was ok and I got a elderly woman as a help , she doesn’t lives with us , she comes at 6 am and closes at 8pm and I also brought 2 of my nieces 18 and 11 to the house. Every since she started working she has never get home on time , sometimes she stays until 10pm , if I talk she get angry and will start raining insults on me , we haven’t make love in a long time , she always complains of being tired , her stomach is paining her etc etc. I have decided to leave her alone and not bother her about sex anymore , and it doesn’t bother too. She acts as im a nobody to her. So it happened in July I came back home to found my niece 11 years old with a deep cut and blood on her eyebrows and my wife did it just because the girl broke a plate so she hit the girl with the broken plate , first all I had to rush her to the hospital and she had 11 stitches and went back home, all I wanted to sit with her and to talk sense with her but she wasn’t even interested all she could do was shouting at me , accusing me of sleeping with both my nieces and the elderly house help , was so angry that I have beaten her badly which I later regretted and apologise to her.

That was the first time I have lay my hand on her something I vow not to do to the woman I love but she pushed me so bad and I have been remorseful but she refuse to forgive me . It’s now 4 months we don’t talk , we don’t sleep in the same room , she just do her own and come home anytime she pleases. I just don’t know what to do anymore , I love my wife and children but her attitudes isn’t right. We have 3 beautiful children 5and twins are 4. Sometime i want to divorce her but when I think about my children I just don’t feel like going ahead with divorce but I’m also a human and can’t stop living like this .

Please my brothers and sisters help me with your advices

you are a man

Dem suppose lock you and your evil wife for prison.

I don't care about the foolishness that transpired between you both, but the day she assaulted her first victim was the day you should have done something.

I despise foolish, spineless husband like yours. How could you let that slide all because of your weak feelings of love? Now, she'd done it to your niece, lobatan

Wait till one day she kill all your 3 children

Didinrin apoda

Let her know what you want, and I hope you have evidence of all the atrocities she had committed to all those minors. That way you can present it to the court should incase you need it to fight for the custody of your children in the future.

I won't advocate for a divorce cos it's hard when children are involved but call her and her family into a meeting, and express your feelings, forgive her of her past and let her know there won't be second chance.

Man up Brother, and pls always fight for little children from being abused.

May God help you and your family

Is she from edo?

This case is really simple, can you try to take all your kids Borden house maybe for just one team only, after that you will tell your wife that you want to marry a second wife, but women are really dangerous for hearing of marry another wife because he might kill you, but option you can find just a room self and stay for that 3 months that your kids was going to spend in the school, but if she didn’t change for that 3 months best things is to divorce her is the best solution

Divorce

You married a lazy wife,she pretended she was good at house chores,she's bringing out her real and lazy character now. Maybe you frighten her you are getting a new wife,dont ask her for food,come back late and sleep immediately.maybe her brain will reset small

I have texted twice to say we need to talk for her to ignore the text. I am feeling really down dont know what I have done to her to deserve this treatment. I'm going to try talking to her one last time I think and if I dont get any form of positive response then i will call for family meetings and I will have to end marriage.

Mrcashman87:
I am not new to Nairaland but I have to use this account for my story . I have met her in 2009 she was calm , doesn’t talk much but easily get angry and I also noticed that she wasn’t a good cook but was good in other things ( chores) , it didn’t stopped me from loving her, I didn’t tell any of my people even though I have sisters that are good cook but I decided to take her to catering school to learn how to cook which she went for lessons to practice.

We got married in 2013 , she got pregnant that same month and she became so lazy that I will go to work and come back to found the house very messy with everything’s all over the places , dirty dishes and not dinner yet, and I have to take over cleaning and cooking dinner for us. She claimed she could not longer clean the house , she is tired and need to rest so I have decided to get a house help for her , a small 14 years old, this girl was hard working , very obedient but to my wife she is evil , every single day I comes back from work , this girl is always in tears my wife will beat the hell out of her to the extent of giving her black eye , if I confront her she will start accusing me of sleeping with the girl which is not true, I can never stoop so low to sleep with an underage girl. I have nieces of similar ages what I wouldn’t want another person to do to my nieces and wouldn’t do to another person daughter.

One time I came back from work to found the girl in a pool of blood , that my wife hit her with a wooden chair and she had a deep cut on her head , I got angry with my wife even her reasons didn’t make sense to me , all because she asked the poor girl to warmed up the baby milk and she mistakenly left it for too long , the milk was too hot to give to the crying baby so she got angry at her and hit her . I have told my wife she shouldn’t act like that no matter what and here come again you are sleeping with her and that’s why u are siding with her , we had an heated argument that I have left the house to cool down , I came back after 5 hours and next morning I have send for my brother to take the girl back to her parents , I have given her money 30k to manage that was how the girl left the house.

When our first child was 6 months , we found out she was 2 months pregnant she cried that the baby is too small , she can’t keep the pregnancy , I have begged her to keep that everything will be alright . Our twins were born a girl and boy , having 3 children under 2 wasn’t easy for us and I have to go to work while she staying with the kids all alone and she was depressed , I have decided to bring in a house help 15 years old boy , the same thing repeated again , she was maltreated him the same thing she did with the girl , that boy didn’t even stays with us for 2 months , he run away . I came back to found her crying that the boy has slapped her and run away, I was angry for what he did even swear if I catch him , he will regret the day he was born but the other way I knew that boy did it for self defence .

After the boy left I said no more e help , she will have to manage alone because I couldn’t help her anymore , but my house become dirty that I wouldn’t even want to bring in visitors because of the state of the house , dirty plates can stay in the sink for 3 -4 days , laundry she has a washing machine but she couldn’t bother to do , cooking we eats take away every single night , imagine I comes back home 9pm due to my job and Lagos traffic , at that time I’m even exhausted but I have to started cleaning , one time I got pissed with her that she didn’t wash the eldest daughter school uniform and all her uniform 5 sets of uniform were dirty and she had no clean one to put on in the morning , I have to wash them at 10pm and for her she didn’t see anything wrong with that.

When the twins were 1 years she told me she is tired of staying at home that she wanted to go to work , I have told her to wait at least for them to be a year and 6 months to start school before she can pursue her career but she disagreed with me, so I gave her money for business , she opened a shop . We had an agreement that she should be closing down her shop at 7pm so she could be home with the kids and take care of the house , she was ok and I got a elderly woman as a help , she doesn’t lives with us , she comes at 6 am and closes at 8pm and I also brought 2 of my nieces 18 and 11 to the house. Every since she started working she has never get home on time , sometimes she stays until 10pm , if I talk she get angry and will start raining insults on me , we haven’t make love in a long time , she always complains of being tired , her stomach is paining her etc etc. I have decided to leave her alone and not bother her about sex anymore , and it doesn’t bother too. She acts as im a nobody to her. So it happened in July I came back home to found my niece 11 years old with a deep cut and blood on her eyebrows and my wife did it just because the girl broke a plate so she hit the girl with the broken plate , first all I had to rush her to the hospital and she had 11 stitches and went back home, all I wanted to sit with her and to talk sense with her but she wasn’t even interested all she could do was shouting at me , accusing me of sleeping with both my nieces and the elderly house help , was so angry that I have beaten her badly which I later regretted and apologise to her.

That was the first time I have lay my hand on her something I vow not to do to the woman I love but she pushed me so bad and I have been remorseful but she refuse to forgive me . It’s now 4 months we don’t talk , we don’t sleep in the same room , she just do her own and come home anytime she pleases. I just don’t know what to do anymore , I love my wife and children but her attitudes isn’t right. We have 3 beautiful children 5and twins are 4. Sometime i want to divorce her but when I think about my children I just don’t feel like going ahead with divorce but I’m also a human and can’t stop living like this .

Please my brothers and sisters help me with your advices

I wish u ll hear me out.


Divorce that bitch u call a wife, u knw why

Cos one day u might bring in anoda maid nd she will so beat that maid that it will get to court. Once it gets to court u re doomed.

Speaking from experience. I had a neighbor at my office plaza that his wife landed him into trouble of this kind and till 2day almost all his properties re gone due to court orders.

Pls be guided

Frankly speaking lots of men are passing through hell in marriage all in the name of children are involved and don't want to divorce.

My case looks like yours but mine is different because my woman have nobody to fight or injured, occasionally she spit venom on the two kids we have, by maltreating and reluctant to cook for them.

But my case have long have solution, because my religion allowed me to take another woman as wife which I did and am happy and left her with her altitude.

No communication, no food, no sex, nothing between except living in my house to look after our kids.

My second wife live in another apartment.

Conclusively, am planning of divorcing her finally, to set her free but I still love my two kids and the kids love me.

Just last week I got a call from my brother of their plan with her mother to visit our house for settlement which am not happy about, because I have made up my mind.

God, please save and protect married men out there.