Ubunja while you were away oloshos don collect our boys finish for nairaland . I think i fall in the category of PREY. My girlfriend cannot match the girls i roll with real life and online in terms of beauty and standard, but i'm stuck with her because she respects me (i may be wrong sha) and would do anything for me. And For that reason i reciprocate the love .

The king is back. All hail the king!!!!!

Ariza:
I feel pity for the young lady but then she made her choice just like every other women out there who remain in abusive relationships/ Marriages.
It all about Self esteem. They believe the partners in their lives are the best they can get.

Why do you women always like to play the victim?Do you know how many men are suffering in toxic relationships?It's not a gender specific thing ,so don't come here and play the victim card
Men have lost money and properties for loving these women and we end up getting mocked by these same women ,so please everyone suffers and it's not a gender specific thing

Wow this wow!!!

Shout out to Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW).

It's rainning
It's buzzling



quote author=ubunja post=83890777]How To Get A Girl To Put You On A Pedestal.

PROLOGUE.
You have seen it before in your hood. A pretty girl has all the men hitting on her and trying to impress her with money and things. She ignores them. Or plays them. Because she's got her eye on some insignificant nonentity of a Guy. As hard to get as the girl is for other men, this nobody of a Guy gets her attention easy. He makes her laugh easy. He impresses her easy. Much to the anger and confusion of all the other men who know they are better by far than the Guy.

Now, what does the Guy have that all the other men don't have that has cast a spell on the girl?

nothing.

The guy is simply chosen.

MOYO MUTI UNOMERA PAUNODA.
In the Zimbabwean Shona language we have a saying: "Moyo muti unomera paunoda" - The heart is like a tree that grows where it chooses.

We can't predict where a plant will grow. A plant will grow in the most favorable places like river banks and rain forests. But it will also grow in the least favorable places like deserts and cracks on a pavement and against all odds thrive.

Same with love.

Love is emotions and emotions are Unpredictable. Like the Unpredictable growth of plants.
Love flourishes in the most favorable places but it will also flourish in the least favorable places. "Moyo muti unomera paunoda" - The heart is like a tree that grows where it chooses. In other words, "The heart wants what the heart wants". And whom the heart wants is the Prize.

GET A GIRL TO RESPECT YOU.
So much has been said about how women no longer respect men. How women no longer submit and put men in their rightful place as the Head.

Women were born to follow. Men were born to lead. But, remember followers choose the leader. Not the other way round. We vote for our leaders. Our leaders don't vote for us.

It's the same with women and respect.

If your girl doesn't respect you there's precious little you can do to make her respect you. You played the game backwards. You were supposed to find a girl who respected you already then make her your girl. But instead you found a girl, made her your GF then tried to make her respect you. It doesn't work that way.

You don't make a girl respect you. That's impossible. Girls respect whoever they think is worthy of respect. What you do is You find a girl who respects you already and make her your girl. This way there's no struggle to earn anything because everything is already given. Just like how God loved us before we were born and there's nothing we did to earn His love. God loves us because He CHOSE us. That is true love. A girl must love you because she chose you. Not because you did anything to earn her love. Love must not be earned.

Same with respect.

If a girl already thinks you're respectable then you're a thousand steps ahead of every other guy trying to earn her respect because in love NOTHING must be earned.

Men do many things backwards... A man will meet a Scantily Dressed girl, fall in love then try to make her wear long dresses. It won't work. She'll tell you it was the miniskirts and minidresses that made you love her, why must she now change. What you must do is find a decently dressed girl if you want a decently dressed wife. Anyways, it will be far easier to make a decent girl dress sexy than to make a ho dress decently. You can't turn a ho into a housewife but you can turn a housewife into a ho. Remember every girl is looking for a guy she can be bad for.

MY STORY.
I found my babymama a virgin at about 23.

She was strict and many guys had tried their luck with her and failed. But when she met me she practically handed herself to me. Winning her heart was so effortless. And she's still the easiest girl I ever fvcked. And I fvcked her so much that within months she gave me a baby.

One day a friend visited us and was shocked to see my GF kneel down to serve me food. (God is my Witness) When we were alone my friend said I must be hitting my GF that's why she served me food kneeling. I was offended. Because I never asked anyone to kneel for me. And I explained this to him but I could see he was not convinced.

Two years after breaking up I met my babymama and I wanted to check something on her phone but there was a password (she never used to put passwords). I asked for the password and she replied "it's your name". I didn't believe it but typed it anyways. And the phone unlocked!!!. I was surprised.

A few months ago this year, I went to see her because I missed my daughter and she (my babymama) said, "Whatever you're doing, when you get tired of it, I will be waiting for you". I didn't reply. Then she told me our daughter was grown and she needed a brother. Guess what? I will give her another baby soonest!

We have an inside joke where I tell her she can't move on cause I cast a spell on her. She laughs hard at it.

Why am I telling you all this??

I'm telling you this Because I did NOTHING to get this girl to fall so deep in love with me. I didn't campaign. I didn't spend a cent. I didn't buy her anything. Not even. What happened is one simple thing that was beyond even my control: I FITTED THE DESCRIPTION OF THE TYPE OF GUY SHE WANTED. Simple.

Whatever this girl saw in me she liked it. I didn't put any effort to make her like me. She just liked me. I was her type. Was she my type? No. She was from the wrong tribe. And was too reserved for my liking. BUT I WAS HER TYPE. That was what mattered. And I ran with that. I didn't even know she was a virgin. She kept it a secret until the moment I took out my dick.

The moral of the story is this:
If a girl loves you first you are the Prize. If a woman likes you first you are the Trophy. And there's very little you can do wrong in her eyes. She'll always excuse your behavior. Someone who likes you without you doing anything to impress them, is someone who'll find it hard to stop liking you when you do something to disappoint them. If your actions didn't create the love, your actions can't destroy the love. Because it's never about your actions, but about YOU.

UNDERSTANDING WHAT IT MEANS TO BE THE PRIZE OR TROPHY.
Any guy can be the Prize or the Trophy to a girl. But there's a very particular way of going about it. You have to play the game right.

There are three things that make a trophy a trophy:

1. A Trophy Is Perfect As Is.

This is the most important thing. The less you do yet the more you impress a girl, a girl you impress the most by doing the least to the point that you impress her TOTALLY by doing TOTALLY NOTHING is the girl with whom you have a realistic chance of being the Prize.

The only girl you should give a chance
is that girl so breathtaken, so infatuated with you that she thinks you are the Prize, for simply breathing. And nothing more. The way a trophy is seen perfect AS IS. So also a girl must see you perfect AS IS. That way there's no spending, pretending, lying and campaigning to earn her affection.

In love NOTHING must be earned.

2. A Trophy Doesn't Choose Who Wins It.

Take for example a football trophy. It doesn't choose what quality of teams get to compete for it. Or what quality of team will take it home. The only way the trophy can get itself won by a decent level team is to be a trophy of a decent football league.
A minor league trophy will be won by minor league teams unless it becomes a major league trophy then it will be won by a major league team.

As a trophy you attract your level. If you don't like the level of women you're attracting then improve and elevate to a higher level. Then higher level women you'll attract.

3. A Trophy Loves No One.

A trophy or a prize may be dreamed of and fantasized about by many, but itself it fantasizes and dreams of no one. A trophy doesn't compete for anyone. It is competed for. A trophy doesn't love anyone. It is loved.

In love, the one who loves less is the trophy.

In all my dealings with women, the breakups that have hurt the most and made me cry the longest were with those women I myself chose, pursued and won. I was too invested. I begged the most and accommodated the greatest. I was the trophy holder. And when the trophy left - as all trophies do when a better competitor appears - I was left devastated.

Look back at all your Exes and you'll see a pattern: The girls you were hurt the most to breakup with were the ones you chased and pursued the hardest. While the girls who brought themselves to you, it was easy not only to get them but also to breakup with them, because YOU were the prize.

UNDERSTAND YOU ARE THE PREY.
The greatest reason guys don't become trophies is guys have made themselves the Hunters.

A hunter can never be a trophy.

Do you know something called Trophy Hunting? (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trophy_hunting) It is the hunting of animals for sport . And the ANIMALS that are hunted and shot are the trophies. Not the hunters. The Prey is the Trophy.

The Lion is king of the Jungle but who hunts? The Female lion. The hunter is not the King. The hunter is the chaser and the chaser has no value.

WHO'S THE TROPHY?
It's always easy to see who's the trophy and who's the hunter in any couple.

Who is more "needy"? On the streets, In photos who is always grabbing the other? Who always has their hand or arm around the other person? That's the hunter. The hunter has no value.

Look at any pictures of rich men or male celebs and stars and you'll see the WOMAN is always the one grabbing the man. Because the woman is the hunter and the man is the trophy.

Whereas pictures of ordinary couples have the MAN grabbing the woman, because the man is the hunter and the woman is the trophy.

WOMEN ARE THE PREDATORS.
The easiest way to get that girl who will worship and put you on a pedestal is for you to understand Women are the Hunters. Not men.

Girls are the Predators and boys are the Prey. God brought Eve to Adam. Eve was the hunter. Adam the prey.

Also Women have the pussy and the Womb. Lovemaking and babymaking are their jurisdiction. Weak as they are it is they who ultimately decide who gets to have sex and who gets to be born.

As a man understand and allow for that.

THE PREY IS THE PRIZE.
Seek and you shall find. And that which you'll find is the Prize. Not you. You are not the Prize. People go looking for treasure. Treasure doesn't go looking for people. We compete for a trophy, the trophy doesn't compete for us.

Whatever you seek/search for/look for, is the Prize. Whether that's a job, a place, an item or a person. It's the Prize. It's more important than you. And you can lose it to a better person than you.

Once you search, once you hunt, once you seek, the other person becomes the Prey. And the Prey is the Prize.

Remember the Prey can live without the Predator but the Predator needs the Prey to survive. The lion needs the gazelle and the kudus or it perishes. The gazelle and the kudus just need grass. So what's valuable? The prey or the predator? The Prey. The Prey is the Prize.

LET GIRLS CHOOSE.
We all have a "type". Or a "kind". Of a person who always catches our eye. We know what turns us on when we see it. That image of what turns us on is what we fantasize about and even masturbate to. Especially women. Women daydream a lot about love.

As a man, your security and longevity with a girl depends on how closely you fit the "type" and kind" of the guy she fantasizes about. The closer you align to her desire, the nearer you are to what she daydreams about, the smoother things will be for you because the more satisfied she'll be with you and the less inclined she'll be to cheat.

But you can't read minds and you don't know what a girl's fantasy is. You can't read hearts and you've no clue as to her desire. So how do you achieve the impossible and match a girl's fantasy and desire?

It's simple: YOU WAIT TO BE CHOSEN.

Wait for the girl whose fantasy matches what you are. Wait for the woman who desires a man like you. Wait for her to choose you. This way you are chosen AS YOU ARE. Without any need to do anything to impress anyone.

VIDEO.
The Pastor in the video below knows and understands the game. He knows women must choose. Watch and see how things must be done. See how much easier it is for men when women do the choosing:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbuquJHtTuY

That's how things must be done.

The attention and affection of a woman must never be earned, bought, paid for, fought for or struggled for. It must come freely WITHOUT you doing anything but breathing.

VIDEO ANALYSIS.
Now, on the video above, WHO IS THE PRIZE? The women who did the choosing or the men who waited to be chosen? Its the men of course. The men are the Prize because they are the women's fantasy. By choosing, the women got their fantasy. But by choosing they lost their power. The women lost their power because they are the ones who are in love. Not the men.

When you love someone, that person automatically has power over you. Because when you love someone you can lie, steal, pay, toil, slave, kill or kill yourself for that person. That's the power they hold over you.

In love, you are either the Hunter who identifies, pursues and acquires your Fantasy, or you're the Fantasy identified, pursued and acquired by the Hunter. The Hunter chases and possesses the fantasy ("she's the girl of my dreams and I finally won her heart" / "he's the guy of my dreams and I finally won his heart" ). But the Hunter who gets the fantasy has LESS power because he/she is the one infatuated, in lust and in love. Not the fantasy.

The fantasy, the person you call your dream guy or dream girl, while you can't live without them, they can live without you because you are not their dream anything.

The guys in the video above, they have more power because they are chosen. The women have less power because they chose. In quarrels the women will always be reminded, "You chose me. I didn't choose you!" - The most disempowering words you can say to anyone.
But the power each man holds over his woman comes at a cost to the man: By being someone else's fantasy you deny yourself your own fantasy. Each side of the equation has its good and bad.

THE CHOSEN IS THE PRIZE.
You have power over anyone to whom you're a fantasy. And you can only be a fantasy if you're chosen.

But how do you know a woman is choosing you? Green Lights of course. No Green lights no approach.

#TheRedPill
#MGTOW [/quote]

kurupt1:
Why do you women always like to play the victim?Do you know how many men are suffering in toxic relationships?It's not a gender specific thing ,so don't come here and play the victim card
Men have lost money and properties for loving these women and we end up getting mocked by these same women ,so please everyone suffers and it's not a gender specific thing

Ermm Bros, I'm not Op's babymama , how did I play victim?

Good point, now if you had written this thread and used your story as a case study, then same judgement and measures would have been used in vindicating you. Simply put, the case study is about a man using woman's loyalty and love against her and not the other way round. Wouldn't it a bit off point or out of context to dive into "a woman do it too" rebuttal in this case?.

You are right about being taken advantage of. Men take advantage of women and vice versa, But then that doesn't justify the action. That everyone does it doesn't make it right.Finally it is very insane of any being be it man or woman to remain in a toxic relationship.

Boss!! Have been reading your miseducation for a while now. My situation is peculiar and related to this topic. My present galfriend chose me, she went out of her way to get me and she's my type of gal. But of late have discovered am the one now to attach. B4 now she will do anything I ask go out of her way to please me, but recently I find out am the one trying to keep her. making her feel to comfortable.
How do I get her back to default??

Agp19:
Boss!! Have been reading your miseducation for a while now. My situation is peculiar and related to this topic. My present galfriend chose me, she went out of her way to get me and she's my type of gal. But of late have discovered am the one now to attach. B4 now she will do anything I ask go out of her way to please me, but recently I find out am the one trying to keep her. making her feel to comfortable.
How do I get her back to default??

Who keeps a banana peel after eating the banana?.

Great expository write-up. I wanna say, for the same reason a man gets his heart broken chasing after a woman who doesn't like him, a woman also gets treated like trash by the man who doesn't like her too.

That reason is compatibility, which sadly, is only based on luck and probability when it comes to love and relationship. It is usually very rare to see two people love each other equally, for no reason( according to the op). That of course, would always be the perfect relationship, any day.

So 50:50 love is super rare. Other ratios are more often, the reality. That's where compromise and tolerance would be needed to stay together. Though compromise and tolerance would only be effective if the 'love ratio' isn't so tilted to one side. Otherwise, we see the vulnerable party getting taken advantage of or better still, pitied, which would inevitably lead to them getting hurt.

For a player, who doesn't want to settle down, the OP's essay is a perfect game strategy. But if you're serious or done playing, then find someone with whom your affection ratio is closer to 50:50, say 60:40 or 55:45, and make up for the deficits with compromise and tolerance.

tintingz:
Even though this is a popular title known for Lions.

1. Lion is not the king of the jungle, they don't stay in jungles.
Sometimes u need to read to widen ur knowledge and not to criticize in other to sound intellectual... traditionally, it's believed that a lion is the king of the jungle, so u coming here to refuse that , doesn't mean you're right or they are wrong. U even failed to mention where lions can be found ( even if u do, how sure are you, cos I'm sure you dont leave with a lion and I know u will only argue based on nonsense you're reading on google)
2. Comparing "all" animal traits to humans[b] is ridiculous[/b], animals strictly follow how they are engineered and they vary, humans bypass some. A hunter(worker) In human society can be a leader and be valued.

Brother stop exposing ur ignorance ok, the man is trying to use what every one can traditionally relate with ok

3. Using your animal analogy, in the ant colony who's the leader? [/quote] can u see that you've fumbled?, if u really meant ur point 2 up there, there will not be any need for this rhetorical questions...
Cc. Ubunja

[/quote] finally your type always want to refute a palpable facts without replacing it with a concrete evidence just for public validation

I go up my game again for this...ubunja is the 6th most intellectually endowed person I've come across in my life

Ubunja my mentor welcome back sir.... Unbehalf of nairaland boys association, i welcome you back officially.

Mad one Ubunja, this is an eye opener

Kudos

Keep them coming bro... let it rain!
Following the miseducations bumper to bumper.

Redpill for life! I will take overdose sef

seanwilliam:
Brother stop exposing ur ignorance ok, the man is trying to use what every one can traditionally relate with ok

There's difference using clichés and logic.

if u really meant ur point 2 up there, there will not be any need for this rhetorical questions...

Why not tell us why the ant colony is headed by the queen?

finally your type always want to refute a palpable facts without replacing it with a concrete evidence just for public validation

I just refuted his post with logic and evidence.

Lion is not the king of the jungle in reality and in general in the animal kingdom. Ubunja tries to tell us a female is a hunter therefore not valued, in the human society it's not the case.

The animal kingdom strictly follow how they are naturally engineered, there are where the male specie head and there are where the female specie head like the female Elephants.

In the human society, we create social myths, we construct how the society should be and it changes from time to time.

Rilwayne001:


You can't stop looking for argument where there's non, can you?

Or rightly, you can't exist on nairaland without arguing, can you?

Smh

Red herring.

Ariza:
If only mothers would pay more attention on their wards psychological needs like they do their physical needs. A mother will focus more on teaching the female child body anatomy but the male child mental anatomy. When a mother talks to her female child, You hear things like, don't let a man touch you, you will get pregnant, don't play with boys because you will become like boys, sit well so your pants won't show and boys will laugh at you. Learn to cook so that you will get husband, Learn to wash so that you will have a husband, don't talk anyhow no man will marry you etc.Right from the beginning this girl child's life has been mudded to revolve around , boys, Men and what men think. She's has been caged to live her life for men's validation and she can't be blamed for not knowing Self worth, Self value, Self esteem and Self Love because she wasn't taught.


On the other hand, When a mother lectures her son. You hear things like: Be strong, Don't cry, Work hard so you can buy a house for me and your father, Marry a beautiful wife, Be rich, You can be anything when you have money. You must be brave, strong willed and disciplined, Never let anyone pull you down. All these just to build up her son's mental health. And you expect the child to grow into a Man of integrity?A man who is chaste and prides his body? A man who values and respect his body so much that he wouldn't do the next available hole? No way! He was never taught. Most men were trained to act like dogs, only the self disciplined one acts otherwise.

Nice points and write up

Ariza:
A very long way! I added more to my previous post. The equation has never been balanced. Just as a female child is trained to be a puppet, the male child is trained to be a robotic slowpoke who has been programmed to see his ability to provide as his only sense of value. He will continue to be relevant as long as he can make money and provide, he can do anything as long as he has the cash. When a man's sense of value is attached to what he has to offer, not only has he being partially condemned, he stand a chance of greater condemnation and humiliation when he is unable to deliver. The pains a male child suffers. For a male child he has no chance or excuse to fail, and we all can see where that has led the society so far.

We all have a very long way to go, but the first step is elevating SELF LOVE. Preach Self Love across all genders, no one deserves to be caged.

Hmmmmmmmm

sirvvy:

Bro u dey jot down important points?

Grandlord:
Great expository write-up. I wanna say, for the same reason a man gets his heart broken chasing after a woman who doesn't like him, a woman also gets treated like trash by the man who doesn't like her too.

That reason is compatibility, which sadly, is only based on luck and probability when it comes to love and relationship. It is usually very rare to see two people love each other equally, for no reason( according to the op). That of course, would always be the perfect relationship, any day.

So 50:50 love is super rare. Other ratios are more often, the reality. That's where compromise and tolerance would be needed to stay together. Though compromise and tolerance would only be effective if the 'love ratio' isn't so tilted to one side. Otherwise, we see the vulnerable party getting taken advantage of or better still, pitied, which would inevitably lead to them getting hurt.

For a player, who doesn't want to settle down, the OP's essay is a perfect game strategy. But if you're serious or done playing, then find someone with whom your affection ratio is closer to 50:50, say 60:40 or 55:45, and make up for the deficits with compromise and tolerance.

Beautiful write up sir, more grace.

Finally! Lemme go and watch united match first, i'd come back and read the latest mised.

Agp19:
Boss!! Have been reading your miseducation for a while now. My situation is peculiar and related to this topic. My present galfriend chose me, she went out of her way to get me and she's my type of gal. But of late have discovered am the one now to attach. B4 now she will do anything I ask go out of her way to please me, but recently I find out am the one trying to keep her. making her feel to comfortable.
How do I get her back to default??

To go back to default, simply pretend to withdraw the attention and love you’re showing her, act uninterested in her. If she still genuinely loves you, she will come back to her senses and shower you with love and attention. My woman also tried doing the same thing, she fell in love crazily and I also loved her in return. Later she started acting like a goddess that must be worshipped, so I withdrew my love for her and started acting like I’m no longer interested in the relationship. Trust me, within a week she became worried due to my attitude towards her and asked if she offended me. I told her point blank that I changed towards her because of her recent attitude and she apologized intensely. She’s back to being all loved up now, although I don’t intend to reciprocate it openly like I did before.

Ariza:
A very long way! I added more to my previous post. The equation has never been balanced. Just as a female child is trained to be a puppet, the male child is trained to be a robotic slowpoke who has been programmed to see his ability to provide as his only sense of value. He will continue to be relevant as long as he can make money and provide, he can do anything as long as he has the cash. When a man's sense of value is attached to what he has to offer, not only has he being partially condemned, he stand a chance of greater condemnation and humiliation when he is unable to deliver. The pains a male child suffers. For a male child he has no chance or excuse to fail, and we all can see where that has led the society so far.

We all have a very long way to go, but the first step is elevating SELF LOVE. Preach Self Love across all genders, no one deserves to be caged.

so much sense in this one. At the end of the day we are all screwed. The equation has never been balanced.

We are all recovering from the damage society has done to us

ericsmith:




Yu knw even if God himsef had given adam lecture to liberate him from pussy .. that would av been Gods 1st n only failure.
Don't get it twisted i don't think anyone can or ubunja is trying to liberate men from pussy ... d scope here is all about liberating men from women's games, tactics & deciet ... life its a game n men needs to keep possession of the ball if they must win, becos @ d end no lady wants to go home wit a loser.
OnLy gays are immune to pussy nobody can liberate u frm where u came out

even gays are out here having sex with women. Those gays are shifty crooks

Duggedised12:
So let me get this straight,you have a lady you met a virgin ,she has a daughter for you ,love you effortlesssly and even kneels down to serve you ,yet she is still your babymama? Wow you see why i said humans are insatiable? You just like every ingrate out there are the reason many women have had to borrow themselves sense and built up a defense mechanism so wicked men like you will not take advantage of them.

A man says he doesn't want a ho yet he cant wife a decent one who respects him, can you tell my why i should not call you a hypocrite ? Men like you are the ones who treat women anyhow because in their minds "she is not going anywhere,she will be waiting for me when i am done having fun with these hoes out here".

I must say you got yourself a perfect prey who isn't leaving your net any time soon ,so enjoy.

being chosen has its perks.

Duggedised12:
So let me get this straight,you have a lady you met a virgin ,she has a daughter for you ,love you effortlesssly and even kneels down to serve you ,yet she is still your babymama? Wow you see why i said humans are insatiable? You just like every ingrate out there are the reason many women have had to borrow themselves sense and built up a defense mechanism so wicked men like you will not take advantage of them.

A man says he doesn't want a ho yet he cant wife a decent one who respects him, can you tell my why i should not call you a hypocrite ? Men like you are the ones who treat women anyhow because in their minds "she is not going anywhere,she will be waiting for me when i am done having fun with these hoes out here".

I must say you got yourself a perfect prey who isn't leaving your net any time soon ,so enjoy.

I've learnt a lot from the dude. He's world class!!

Oriyomin25:
Ubunja while you were away oloshos don collect our boys finish for nairaland . I think i fall in the category of PREY. My girlfriend cannot match the girls i roll with real life and online in terms of beauty and standard, but i'm stuck with her because she respects me (i may be wrong sha) and would do anything for me. And For that reason i reciprocate the love .

well if her looks are not up to standards you've to upgrade. And you upgrade by upgrading yourself. Dress better talk better walk better. Hit the gym. You'll be chosen by higher class of women.

Self-improvement is key in the game of choosing.
The Animal Kingdom totally runs on the Females choosing the males. Thats why among animals the males are more beautiful than the females.

Ariza:
If only mothers would pay more attention on their wards psychological needs like they do their physical needs. A mother will focus more on teaching the female child body anatomy but the male child mental anatomy. When a mother talks to her female child, You hear things like, don't let a man touch you, you will get pregnant, don't play with boys because you will become like boys, sit well so your pants won't show and boys will laugh at you. Learn to cook so that you will get husband, Learn to wash so that you will have a husband, don't talk anyhow no man will marry you etc.Right from the beginning this girl child's life has been mudded to revolve around , boys, Men and what men think. She's has been caged to live her life for men's validation and she can't be blamed for not knowing Self worth, Self value, Self esteem and Self Love because she wasn't taught.


On the other hand, When a mother lectures her son. You hear things like: Be strong, Don't cry, Work hard so you can buy a house for me and your father, Marry a beautiful wife, Be rich, You can be anything when you have money. You must be brave, strong willed and disciplined, Never let anyone pull you down. All these just to build up her son's mental health. And you expect the child to grow into a Man of integrity?A man who is chaste and prides his body? A man who values and respect his body so much that he wouldn't do the next available hole? No way! He was never taught. Most men were trained to act like dogs, only the self disciplined one acts otherwise.

Wow touché!, apart from the one like Nairaland limit us to give, I'm giving you 100 additional likes.

You just stated the social myths I talked about, I hope ubunja get this now.

Agp19:
Boss!! Have been reading your miseducation for a while now. My situation is peculiar and related to this topic. My present galfriend chose me, she went out of her way to get me and she's my type of gal. But of late have discovered am the one now to attach. B4 now she will do anything I ask go out of her way to please me, but recently I find out am the one trying to keep her. making her feel to comfortable.
How do I get her back to default??

subtract the love and affection. Create drama. You have created a comfort zone for her and she's now taking you for granted.

Always keep a woman on her toes.

look at them''

anyway be rich, have plenty moiney and fresh toto go fall on you all day errday


all dee long epistles na jussss trash

Grandlord:
Great expository write-up. I wanna say, for the same reason a man gets his heart broken chasing after a woman who doesn't like him, a woman also gets treated like trash by the man who doesn't like her too.

That reason is compatibility, which sadly, is only based on luck and probability when it comes to love and relationship. It is usually very rare to see two people love each other equally, for no reason( according to the op). That of course, would always be the perfect relationship, any day.

So 50:50 love is super rare. Other ratios are more often, the reality. That's where compromise and tolerance would be needed to stay together. Though compromise and tolerance would only be effective if the 'love ratio' isn't so tilted to one side. Otherwise, we see the vulnerable party getting taken advantage of or better still, pitied, which would inevitably lead to them getting hurt.

For a player, who doesn't want to settle down, the OP's essay is a perfect game strategy. But if you're serious or done playing, then find someone with whom your affection ratio is closer to 50:50, say 60:40 or 55:45, and make up for the deficits with compromise and tolerance.

yes sir. Anyone can be a Prize, male or female. What people need to understand is as long as you're chasing you will be hurt.

We need to stop chasing.