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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) (52338 Views)
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Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by CharlesJok3r: 8:49am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Not worth it to me! 2 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by lonelydora: 8:49am On Dec 13, 2019 |
IceColdVeins: Children obey your parents so that your days will be long... Father do not provoke your children to anger... Says the Holy Bible. 3 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Enemyofpeace: 8:49am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Rubbish just because you wa t to travel to village for Christmas to go see your papa we no go hear word again. Na wetin you for do for sey you carry am enter plane travel go Pakistan go do shopping? You go close down nairaland be dat. I ate people showing off 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Bizibi(m): 8:50am On Dec 13, 2019 |
chriskosherbal:yes!!!! I love this comment.....the day I lost my dad was the day I knew what it takes to be in control of a company, battle backbiters and ungrateful souls and the head of a family.many people commenting here don't know life itself is a mystery that we cannot comprehend. 2 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by luminouz(m): 8:50am On Dec 13, 2019 |
chriskosherbal: I feel your points. The scenario you described happens more than often. I had to be very logical too while young or I would have resented my dad. I opened my eyes,saw things from his perspectives and knew that man would sell his soul to make his children prosper. He proved it to us all. Financial downturns sometimes make women very unruly at home and I understood that too. They are still together and waxing strong and I have learnt a valuable lesson. Leave Bratislava alone. Dude or chick is running on emotional fumes and I totally get that. 8 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Sterope(f): 8:51am On Dec 13, 2019 |
How is it contradictory? You can forgive, let yourself heal and still not have a relationship. The forgiveness is not for them, it is for yourself. Afamed: 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Nobody: 8:52am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Afamed:is it ur parents??!! .. Must u have a relationship with the deadbeat father...forgiving him and having a relationship are 2 different things.. I believe u are educated na 6 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Nobody: 8:53am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Sterope:I just tire... Some will just quote without thinking 4 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by crackhaus: 8:54am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Miarose:You're probably one of the only ones here who actually has working neurons in the brain. I've been following this since yesterday and wondering why people were antagonizing the OP. 11 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by bukatyne(f): 8:54am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Miarose: Another angle which would fit into my scenario 1. |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by luminouz(m): 8:57am On Dec 13, 2019 |
crackhaus: Now you see why I most times ignore some comments? Most People here are incapable of well grounded logic. Is it frustration,bile,anger or some emotional bullcrap that drive their thoughts,I dont know. But they just can't reason without clouding their judgement with emotions. You and the Mia bloke can see well. I'm glad people like us are not extinct on NL. 3 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by NoToPile: 8:57am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Loool, so the moral is never ever train your child alone as a woman, las las the they would say they didn't listen to their father's point of view for abandoning them at some point in their lives. A father has no excuse for abandoning his children (even if its just for a few years) irrespective of his issues with their mum. Op you can reconcile with your dad, but dont EVER try to water down the sufferings of your mum. From the comments this thread going the lane of another operation blame the woman thread. 17 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Sterope(f): 8:58am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Inasmuch this could be true. It doesn't remove from the fact that some parents are cruel to their partners and their children. What on earth could his mum have done to have made his father absent from his life, both financially and emotionally? What stopped him from reaching out when he was in the University? You were eight in number. Have you wondered if your dad is one of those men that pressured their wives into shunning family planning? Perhaps, when your dad had money, he behaved badly. Have you asked your mum that question? However, I don't agree with her making the house a living hell in your presence but have you asked her why she acted the way she did? chriskosherbal: 3 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Irore: 8:58am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Romanoff:That's why it's called an sms. 1 Like |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by nams77: 8:58am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Glad you made up with your dad. No matter what, the are the beginning of you. One thing you will note later, as you begin to grow old, you discover that you are beginning to become them( you act, think and may even look like your dad) Looking at myself today, i am startled how so much i resembled my father. In action, thought pattern, looks and even poise. My son has even started surprising me too 3 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by jaxxy(m): 8:59am On Dec 13, 2019 |
BRATISLAVA: I think it’s about being the bigger person than endorsing his bad behavior. We can’t continue to hold a grudge forever. Let’s hope the dad learns and retraces his steps by the sons act. 1 Like |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Sterope(f): 9:00am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Do you know that most women also voice this concern when you ask them to leave abusive men/toxic relationship? They will tell you they cannot train their child alone only for their father to enjoy the benefits. The reason doesn't hold water where lives and emotional well-being are at stake but still taking care of child is not an easy task even for two people. NoToPile: |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by crackhaus: 9:01am On Dec 13, 2019 |
bukatyne:It's not ANOTHER angle Buka, it is the ONLY angle. The OP made it clear that this was a reconciliation after 6yrs. If he's 26 now, he was 20 when he made the decision on his own to stop talking to his father - this probably has nothing to do with the mum. Too many nairalanders make comments based off an idea gotten from comments of other users instead of just reading posts from the person sharing his story to form their own thoughts. 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by cococandy(f): 9:01am On Dec 13, 2019 |
TheArchangel: This part in bold 2 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Angelfrost(m): 9:01am On Dec 13, 2019 |
BRATISLAVA: You have no idea how Nigerian fathers are stuck stubbornly in the belief that giving life to a child is the highest achievement ever... The negligence of this generation of fathers is incredulous. Our generation has got to do much better. 17 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by KanuSE: 9:03am On Dec 13, 2019 |
prizlezzlalasky: We can agree that some broken relationships are irreconcilable. 1 Like |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by anonimi: 9:03am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Graxie: Too much bitterness in one post. Why 6 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Sunsets: 9:05am On Dec 13, 2019 |
My dear, there is nothing that can't be repaired, no matter the length of damage. Just defeat your mindset first. Remember, no one owes you. kallmemrB: 1 Like |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by anochuko01(m): 9:05am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Nice one op. Y'all who aren't happy with what he did can go hug transformer. A friend of mine always scream on his timeline that "separation of two people isn't caused by whatever happened, but by unforgivingness..." 6 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Irore: 9:05am On Dec 13, 2019 |
bukatyne:Thank God you realized fast not to be Moms boy only because those Mom's...…. ehnn. The Bible describes them as the weaker vessel. May you be a good father in Jesus name, amen. |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Nobody: 9:07am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Forgive if you want to forgive, but never blame your mom. Women usually know the inside scoop of the happenings in the family. For long, my mom lied to us that our father was providing for us. When we grew older, we found out on our own, that he lives like a bachelor. Doesn't give a damn about us. If I tell you how that still affects how I see men, you won't believe. Like someone here said, many men misbehave and abandon their kids, cos they know that in a few years those kids will come looking for them. Not me. 20 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Sunsets: 9:09am On Dec 13, 2019 |
You are dead wrong. The young man wants to fix what would become a generational problem and all you see is this. I think you need to fix yourself. You need healing before you can advise someone. dominique: 5 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Afamed: 9:10am On Dec 13, 2019 |
kallmemrB:May God grant him long live. When he has his last breath, the message of having a good relationship with one parent will be clearer to you 2 Likes |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by fuzzywuzzy: 9:10am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Miarose: Madam please keep quiet Thanks I can see that some blockheads are already praising you because they want to insult women and write rubbish about them Read op's post well, 1. he said he suffered a lot due to. paternal negligence and abandonment, let me quote him, ("the effects of parents exhibiting apathetic attitudes towards their wards. Lugubriously, I was a victim of that on the father's part" .) 2. He said he is a graduate at 26 because his mom raised him with limited finances while his dad was building houses up and down. 3. He said he finally decided to go incommunicado with his dad at 200 level because of the issues he had been having with his dad and how he maltreated his mother 4. The dad had always been deadbeat even before the guy stopped communicating, and the dad was a bad husband to the mother as op himself stated. It's not simply an issue between father and child. 23 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Deadbeat Father: How A Nairanlander's Quote Ended My Family's Rift. (photos) by Sterope(f): 9:11am On Dec 13, 2019 |
Single motherhood is not a reason to drag your children into the mental turmoil you suffer because your once true love and father of your children turned into something else. Many mothers do this and it is unfair on the children. There is nothing wrong in single motherhood if it is the best option for the wife and in extension, her children. A mother/parent should always seek the best for herself and her children no matter what might happen in future between the children and the father. Graxie: 8 Likes 1 Share |
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