EmptyCoconutHead:
useless women.
If not for bearing of children and sexual gratification to kill konji, there's no other use of women in marriage.

EmptyCoconutHead:
useless women.
If not for bearing of children and sexual gratification to kill konji, there's no other use of women in marriage.

111sunshine:
the internet has a way of distorting issues.... there was no jab...just two friends toying with each other... bloggers and their search for content sef

midnighter:


Why I am somehow defending the lady is because I put myself in the friend's shoes and realised that she may not be as sensitive as I am.

How do we know that after the bride said "Go and get boyfriend", some jovial ladies wont quickly reply "Yeye, na you people go dash me na!" and forget about it? Some people dont read meaning into things like you or I may.

People are comparing it with a woman who is looking for pregnancy but you forget that the comment will only pain you IF you are looking for pregnancy or you are having some kind of problem. I have small small cousins who have randomly asked me why I dont have a baby yet; it does not do me anything because I am not CURRENTLY looking for a baby but another lady may rush and lock herself inside the bathroom and cry for hours just because of that random comment because the stuff is already bothering her.

We dont know these 2 ladies to know if the woman is satisfied with her singlehood or not so fruit of the womb stuff doesnt mean anything here.

Where you have a point is where you noticed that there were so many people around when she said it; I may not be offended by your comment itself but I may feel embarrassed that you said it in front of somebody else . That would be the painful or hurtful part of it



You are right that the type of society we are in dictates some kind of sensitivity when making certain statements in public.

Especially as a woman and as a bride, there are some certain characteristics you are expected to suppress in public so that people wont label you proud or arrogant.

You are right to remind people to be mindful of their utterances DUE TO the fact that people can read meaning into something you didnt say with bad intentions.

People can go home and stew about things for days and hours without you knowing. Like you said, some people apart from that friend may take it personally because of the stigma of being a single lady past a certain age

I just dont agree that the woman is necessarily being malicious or spiteful on purpose

dangotesmummy:
if she made that statement during her bridal shower then it's ok, people will even understand it as a friendly banter but to make this statement in public? Noo na

It's like telling a person who is unemployed and still searching for a job when he came to greet you at your place of work or office party and say "you no go go find work" as if he doesn't know he has done that already

In this life the most dangerous thing is having an enemy so close to e who you think is still your friend.obviously the babe will still be smiling at her but that Will be the end of their friendship and depending on the type of person she is,she might take it offensive

No be everything you suppose say outside.people should stop using their mouths to expose themselves or what they hold dear.

Some people will marry and after wedding, strange strange sickness will start for them .moreso Yorubas say iku pa opolo tonrin, anbeletase eyi ton jorae mole

When you are happy or angry,be mindful of what you say because your words can reach and surpass where your legs can't reach

Imagine the girl gets home and tells the mother jokingly ABOUT how the wedding went and she didn't mean it in a bad light but the mother took offense (knowing how emotional African mothers can be) what if the girl is not offended and the mother of the girl is nko?

People need to think deeply and not let the emotional blues make you say what will implicate your future.this is Africa and this terrain is dangerous and volatile.every environment has its own dangers but here talking anyhow is dangerous

Bluntguy:
Sound advice. Who knows how many guys' toastings she has rejected. You can never make omelette without breaking eggs

EmptyCoconutHead:
useless women.
If not for bearing of children and sexual gratification to kill konji, there's no other use of women in marriage.

ijewejones:



That's the problem we have with people that's in the school of thought of saying things the way they are(bluntly).

The video is attracting mixed feelings because its out for public consumption. The ladies involved knows their selves very well to know what one can/can't say in public(bluntly).

I can't vouch for any of them because I can't really infer to why such statement was made either by preconceived discussion hence the wedding outburst & as well,the clip is out in public.

On the other hand did you notice somebody released the clip? Why did the person released such emotional clip? Is the person's reason to gather people's opinion or just to castigate?

That's reason I maintain the other part of the business is best inferred & left to the people involved

dangotesmummy:
people upload anything controversial or out of the norm for likes and clout na.we all know this.same reason why the bride twerking on her husband's dick and giving him a lap dance went viral

If the bride was just a normal bride in which the friend said congratulations and she said thank you,it won't go viral.that aside


Knowing their relationships before is immaterial, that statement is totally unnecessary and uncalled for.what happened to thank you and move on

ijewejones:



Try watch the clip again..the reply came spontaneous oo. It's still reason I feel the outburst is a preconceived discussion between them

EmptyCoconutHead:
useless women.
If not for bearing of children and sexual gratification to kill konji, there's no other use of women in marriage.

dangotesmummy:
lol the face (especially the eyes) exposes the motives or intents of a statement and why must the bride MAKE THAT KIND OF INSENSITIVE COMMENT THAT DAY? Why not other days why that day?

Then you telling me it won't pain her is a lie.why won't it pain her? Please tell me from 21 upwards no single Nigerian lady has not been hearing the Go and marry line at home,work,bank, church or mosque.then from her friend again? Face it and admit it,that statement was uncalled for whether or not she would take offense or not, whether that's how they've been throwing jabs at each other or not.

God forbid,how about after wedding the bride becomes unable to give birth or the husband looses his job or develops a strange sickness,don't you know all fingers will be pointed back to the bride with shoti rinisi.otifenukoba ara e.nobody will face the friend or stuff.even if the situation has nothing to do with the friend, everyone will be like see where your overtalk has landed you

Yorubas say that you don't make statements that will give your closet enemies the justification to say WE TOLD YOU SO ,you see am etc... after all the awws and hoos, why not just say thank you my friend,I will celebrate with you to or give her a hug and Keep it moving

sinaj:
She harsh sha

Ebonygirl1:


Mumu. If not for money and sex, what exactly is a man's use in marriage?

Oreofepeters:
I just went through all your posts I can't help but say "you are part of those fiends who want equal right with men yeah?

dangotesmummy:
I have watched the video and when the bride said "no go find boyfriend" was she expecting her friend to start searching for 'boyfriend' in the party or what brought about that statement now?

Anyway please so back to my previous post and read the last paragraph

EmptyCoconutHead:
said by an old single lady who posted a thread cos she's having doubts of getting married.
thank God u said if not for money cos it shows Men are indispensable since money is Paramount.
your thread I screenshoot below says it all

olamakinde:
you fine sha

EmptyCoconutHead:
said by an old single lady who posted a thread cos she's having doubts of getting married.
thank God u said if not for money cos it shows Men are indispensable since money is Paramount.
your thread I screenshoot below says it all

sinaj:
She harsh sha

luminouz:


Watch how the friend go rush say yes to the nigga she has been friendzoning for a while now.


Is it my eye or is the hubby ermmm...kinda old?

Ladycewhy:
lol , if you mean being acknowledge as a human being and being respected not based on my gender but based on my personality ,then i will say yes.

midnighter:


Exactly! Thats what Im trying to tell you. The intention of a friend who you people just like yabbing each other is different from the intention of some busybody auntie or pokenose church elder. Thats exactly why it should affect the way youre seeing it, even if you think it was uncalled for.

From the "Yimmu" face the woman made I could see that she was just being silly to deflect from the emotional tone of the girlfriend.

Your analysis is coming from a place of sensitivity but you forget that the circumstances surrounding an event matter just as much as the event itself. Wondering "why that day?" "Why TODAY of all days" is what YOU would think and some other people standing there would think, not necessarily what those two people would think.



Yes, people may say that and it would be too bad.

It would have been better for her if she had never said it at all, because everything that happened on your wedding day will be remembered forever however it still depends on whether she is actually an arrogant person or if that was just a poorly-timed comment without any bad motivations behind it

The @emboldened would have been better anyway but people will always have some problem with you and what you say and nobody is perfect.

If she has noticed that people are complaining she can as well ask her friend if she was offended by her "joke" and seek her forgiveness to remove any curse from her marriage that she may have invoked on herself that day.

muyoge:
They must have advised the lady to get into a meaningful relationship but it seems the lady has never taken them seriously. Some will never heed advice if such critically defining psychological moments do not come.

You might say the bride was harsh, but that harshness could provoke the lady into action.

Wounds from a friend are better than kisses from an enemy!

sinaj:
that should be her dad.

Ebonygirl1:

FYI I'm still 22...so marriage isn't even on my mind. And yea the thread is valid. Its the 21st freaking century and women don't have to keep putting up with you toxic zoogerian men anymore.

franugo:



This is obviously two friends joking around....u nairalanders like giving unsolicited advice

ijewejones:


Believe me bro,the action is based on the fact they are close friends & probably their previous discussions. Both knows she can't grab a guy immediately as asked.

Whether the reply is okay or not between them is nothing. The mixed feelings is from we(the third parties). I've reasoned,read through & still having the same conclusion that the matter is best left to them..we're just inferring by assumptions "if"

lexy2014:


Then d bride should have completely refrained from inviting her friend 4d wedding if that is d case. And if what u saying is anything to go by, d friend is a guest of d bride. Is it her wedding that she now chose to be giving advise? Is it her wedding that she just suddenly realised that her friend didn't have a bf?

Christmasdon:
When has boyfriend taking over husband .What is boyfriend. what is husband. instead of her to say go and get your own husband.

lexy2014:


Are u saying that at 22 u have interacted with all Nigerian men to have come 2d conclusion that they are toxic?